Bella made a strange sound in her throat. It was somewhere between a cough and a groan, and Jake gave her a questioning look. She returned with a sheepish one, fluttering her hand at the skin of her neck to gesture.
"My throat…"
Jake worried that perhaps there was some internal damage the venom hadn't repaired. "Does it hurt?" he asked, reaching over to press his hand gently to the place where the deadly wound had been three days ago.
"I… Yes?..." she answered, confused, wondering if they were talking about the same thing. She pursed her lips in determination. "It burns. It always burns," she explained. "But I… They – the Cullens… they told me it's always like that. The burning. Even after you… drink…" she winced at the word, "…it never really goes away."
"Oh." Jake pulled his hand away when he realized what she was referring to. "What… Do you…?"
Bella looked away from him, before answering quietly. "…I need to hunt, Jake. It's the only thing that could help."
He blanched, his face turning a chalky, sickly shade at the idea. "You… you can't…"
Bella closed her eyes. "I need to. If I don't… I might lose control and hurt someone… Thirst… the thirst could drive me to do something… and I couldn't stop."
Jake debated silently. 'Take her now, and watch her become an animal… or make her wait, and watch her become a monster…' There wasn't much choice, so he nodded. "I'll take you hunting."
She jerked her eyes open and turned to stare at him. "No… It'll be dangerous…" She recalled… his reaction the first time she'd mentioned joining him on a hunt.
Jake laughed, and Bella was sad. He no longer laughed like he used to. He sounded so jaded. "I can hold my own against you, Bells. And I can make sure you don't hurt anyone."
Bella sighed and nodded. "…Thank you, Jake…" she said quietly.