I came in from school, threw my books onto Ponyboy's bed, and headed straight for my bedroom. I opened my desk drawer and started digging through it. That was where I threw the contents of my pockets every night. It was full of coins, pens, half-eaten packs of gum, hair elastics, and lots of scraps of paper. I barely remembered what the piece I was searching for looked like, but, finally, I found it. In tall, scrawly writing, not unlike Pony's, it said "Tim S." and had a phone number on it. I hoped he had meant what he said when he told me not to hesitate to call him. I had considered asking Two-Bit for help, but I knew if I did, he would feel like he had to tell Darry. I sort of felt like this was the kind of help Tim had been offering, the kind of help I knew nobody else would give me, so I gathered my courage and dialed.

After a few rings, someone picked up. It sounded like it might be Tim.

"Shepards!"

I hesitated. "Tim?" I offered.

"Naw, this is Curly."

"Oh, hey Curly. Uh…this is Scout Curtis, Ponyboy's sister. Is Tim there?" I had no idea if Curly even knew who I was. At the least, I was pretty sure he might know me as Ponyboy's kid sister.

"Hang on." I heard him yell for Tim, then hand him the phone saying "It's that Curtis kid, the girl. What, you screwin' middle schoolers these days?"

"Shut your fuckin' mouth, asshole." I could hear Curly's pained reaction as Tim clearly struck out at him in some way. "Get the hell out of here," he said, then,

"Hello?"

"Tim? It's Scout Curtis. I'm…uh… sorry to bother you."

"No problem. What's up, kid?"

"Well, I wanted to ask you a favor… actually, I kinda, well, I wanted to talk to you about something. Do you think maybe you could meet me somewhere?"

"Now?"

"Well, no, I mean, whenever you have time. Whenever."

"Everything alright, kid? You sound kinda upset."

"Yeah, everything's okay. I just need some help with something, and I'm not really sure who else to ask… but you offered, before… I mean, well…I guess it's the kind of thing I maybe would have gone to Dallas about." I could hear quite a commotion in the background and he covered the receiver as I heard him call "Christ, Curly, would you cut that shit out? I'm on the phone."

He uncovered the receiver. "Then I'm your man. I'm kinda tied up at the moment, but how about later tonight. Eight?"

"Uh…" I was going to have to think of a way to get Darry to let me out. "Okay. Could you meet me at our lot?"

"Sure thing, kid. See you there."

"Okay… Tim?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"You bet."

Now I had to come up with a way to get out of the house to meet him. It didn't take long. I ran out the back door and over to Ben's house.

His Mom answered the door.

"Hi Mrs. Cummings. Is Ben home?"

"He just got back from practice, honey. You can go on back, I think he's in his room." Darry was making me take another week off from going to the gym after school to let my ribs heal. Usually I stayed anyway, and watched either Pony at track or Ben, but today I had made Two-Bit drive me home right after school so I could get some time alone in the house. I'd had to promise Two-Bit about ten times that I would lock the door and stay inside before he finally let me stay alone.

I went back to his door and knocked.

"What, Mom? I'm doing homework."

I cracked open the door. "Please don't think of me as your Mom," I said. He looked up from the bed and smiled. "Hey," he said, motioning me in.

I lay on the bed next to him and kissed him. "You don't do that with your Mom, do you?" I asked.

He looked me in the eye, making a face. "That's kinda sick, Scout. Guys really don't want to think about that."

"I know. Sorry. I couldn't resist."

"So, to what do I owe this pleasure?" I didn't usually come to his house; he usually came to mine.

"Well, I have to ask you a favor."

"Really?" he seemed intrigued.

"I need you to go to the lot with me tonight."

His eyes opened wide. I realized what he was thinking, which was a little funny because both of us knew that neither one of us was anywhere near ready for that kind of stuff. I slapped him lightly on the thigh.

"Don't even think it, Ben. I need to you wait with me there because I need to meet someone and I don't want Darry to know. I need you to cover for me. I'll tell him I'm coming over here to help you with homework."

Suddenly he looked a little upset. "Who are you meeting? A guy?"

"Not really. Nobody you have to worry about."

"Cut the crap, Scout. Who?"

"Tim Shepard."

Ben looked confused. "What do you want with Shepard?"

"Look, Ben, he's doing me a favor. He's been really nice to me since Dally died, and he offered to help me out if he could after… you know… I got hurt. I just need to talk to him."

"Why can't you talk to me?" He looked upset, and suddenly I wondered if asking him had been a mistake.

"I am talking to you, Ben. I'm asking you to go with me to meet him because I don't want to wait alone and I trust you the most not to tell Darry about it. You're the only one I'm telling about meeting him."

"Why can't you tell me what you want to ask him?" Ben wasn't gonna just give in to me.

"I just can't. It's something I need Tim's help with, and that shouldn't be upsetting to you, because I'm not even telling my own brothers I'm meeting with him. I'm telling you, only. If you can't just accept that, I guess I'll just go wait alone. But I would rather have you with me. I'll feel safer if you go with me."

He studied me. "You're a hard person to say no to, Miss Curtis," he said.

"So you'll do it?"

"With reservations," he said.

I pulled him in and gave him a kiss on the lips. Just as he started to lean in to me, I jumped up. "Thanks! I'll come over at seven-thirty! Get that homework done!" I winked and headed back home. I could hear him groaning at me as I went down the hall.

I got my homework from Pony, and showed it to Darry after dinner. He was impressed with my math; I had two pages and hadn't made any mistakes. I guess Pony had forgotten he was supposed to mess some up. Darry seemed to be in a pretty good mood, so I gathered my courage and went for it.

"Darry?" He was making lunches for the next day.

"Yeah?"

"Can I go over to Ben's for a while? I know it's a school night, but he needs help on his English essay. He can't spell for crap. His Mom is home."

He looked at the clock. It was seven-fifteen. "You be back by nine." He was too focused on separating cheese slices for our sandwiches to even turn around.

"I will. Bye." I ran out the door and heard Pony asking Darry, as I left,

"Where's she going?" He's so nosy.

Ben and I walked to the lot together, and sat on the big rock at one side.

"I don't like this, Scout. I don't like lying for you to Darry."

"You probably won't have to. Don't worry about it."

"Well, I am."

I put my hand on his chin and turned his face to mine. "Don't." I said. "Last time I did something bad, I didn't let you take any of the blame. And, if I get caught, I won't this time, either."

He leaned forward and kissed me. We were caught in the act as headlights turned the corner and just about blinded us. Tim pulled up right in front of us. I stood up.

"Thanks, Ben. You don't have to wait. I'll have him drop me off by the house after."

He looked decidedly skeptical and eyed Tim in the car. "Are you sure?"

"Ben, he's fine. He looks out for me. Think of him as Dally. He's scary, but he's not gonna hurt me."

"I don't like it," Ben said, "but I trust you. If you're not home by nine-thirty, I'm telling Darry, though." He'd know I was home by my bedroom light being on.

"I will be!" I yelled and I ran around and jumped into Tim's front seat.

Tim turned to me. "That ain't the guy who beat you up, I hope."

"No way," I said. "That's Ben. He's my best friend."

Tim looked at me and laughed. "Well, I got a best friend too, but we ain't never kissed, and I'd fuckin' kill him if he ever tried!"

"Yeah, well…" I couldn't even begin to explain my relationship with Ben to Tim. I was kind of wondering who his best friend was, now that Dallas was gone.

"Thanks for meeting me," I said. He graciously accepted my changing of the subject.

"I'm glad you called me, kid. Whaddaya need?"

"Can we go somewhere else?" I asked. "Darry doesn't know I'm meeting you. If anyone sees me, I'm in trouble."

"Where you wanna go?"

"Anywhere but here," I said. He started the car and peeled out of the lot. Before I knew it we were across town at Buck Merrill's.

"You know, I'm not supposed to be anywhere near here," I said. I remembered the last time I had been there, following Pony and Johnny.

"Well, apparently this whole meeting is a big secret, so we might as well make it a good one." He shot me a mischievous glance.

I tried to size him up. "Tim, everyone I know thinks I should be afraid of you. So, should I?"

He laughed, and it sounded like a real laugh. "No." He was believable. "I ain't gonna take you inside."

"Good," I said, as I noticed a fight spilling out the front door and a large crowd coming outside to egg them on. "So, about that favor," I said.

"Let's talk."

"I want you to get me a weapon. I'll pay you for it, I just can't buy it myself, I'm not old enough." I had money saved up from birthdays and stuff.

"Whoa, little Curtis. What are we talkin' about, here? A gun?"

"I don't know, maybe. What do you think? That's why I called you."

"'Xactly who you tryin' to kill, kid?"

I turned to face Tim straight on.

"Look, you know what happened to me. I am scared out of my mind, Tim. All the time. Ever since it happened, I can't sleep. I lay awake all night, every night, and I crawl into the kitchen and sleep on the floor outside Darry's door, because I am so scared he'll come back and hurt me again. I fall asleep all day, in school, since I can't sleep at night."

He was looking at me, and I continued.

"I feel helpless, because he hurt me, and scared the life out of me, and I feel like if he comes back he's gonna be able to do exactly the same thing again, because I'm not big enough or strong enough to stop him. I don't want to be helpless. I want to feel like I have a chance, Tim. Like I have a fair shot to make him stop, at least long enough to scream and get my brothers to come help. I just want some help, to give me a fighting chance if he comes back. Because he didn't get what he was after the first time, and I'm scared to death he's gonna come back! I don't want to get hurt again!" I was almost yelling. "I can't stand it anymore! I'm going out of my mind, being scared all the time! He's gonna come back, I know it! And I can't even defend myself! He's gonna be able to do exactly the same thing!"

I had vowed never to cry in front of Tim Shepard, but I was dangerously close. I looked away, calming myself down.

"Look, I ain't in the habit of handin' out weapons to little kids," he said. "I ain't so sure it's the best idea. And your brother sure ain't gonna like it."

"I know he won't," I said, "That's why I am asking you, not him. I guess I'll just have to ask somebody else, then." I didn't know who else there was to ask, though, really.

He shifted in his seat, still looking at me.

"I just thought…Dally woulda helped me," I said, looking down at the seat of the car. "He woulda done anything I needed to make sure I didn't get hurt again." I wasn't lying, either. Dallas would have.

"Look, kid, I didn't say I wouldn't help you, just that it's gonna take some special consideration. Don't you worry," Tim said, and he put his hand on my shoulder and turned my chin to face him. "I'll figure out somethin' for you. Won't be able to get it to you 'til tomorrow though. You gonna be OK for tonight?" I felt like if I had said no, he would have stood guard outside my window for the night. It seemed like that was how earnestly he meant that he intended to look out for me as Dally would have.

"Yeah, I'll just sleep in the kitchen, as usual."

"I wish you could just tell me who hurt you, so I could put an end to all this shit for you."

"Me too." I really did. I just couldn't.

"So, that it? Anything else?" Tim was sincerely offering.

"Just don't rat me out to Darry. And don't say anything to Curly, 'cause he'll tell Ponyboy."

He chuckled. "I keep my mouth shut, girl," he said. "I wouldn't be who I am if I didn't." He was right about that.

"I better get back," I said. "If I'm not back by nine, Darry calls out the cavalry."

"Well let's get you home then." I couldn't even believe how nice Tim was to me. His reputation made him out to be such an asshole. I was wondering if I was seeing the real Tim, or what.

He dropped me off a block from home, as I asked, and didn't leave the curb until he saw me go safely into my house. All three of my brothers were in the living room watching TV. I saw Darry check his watch. It was only eight forty-five.

"How'd the essay go?"

"He can't spell, but the ideas were okay. I'm pretty tired, I'm just gonna go to bed, okay? Goodnight."

"'Night."

I went into my room and changed into my pajamas. I lay there and read books until I heard everyone else going to bed. I knew Darry would check in on me so I shut out my light and feigned sleep for a few minutes. He cracked open my door and peeked in, waiting 'til his eyes adjusted in the light and he saw my form asleep on the bed. He always left it a tiny bit open after he checked on me, I assumed so he could hear if anyone ever came for me in the night again.

Thankfully, so far, nobody had.

..........................

A/N: So, I apologize if Tim is a little OOC here. I know Dally hated kids, but for some reason I see Tim as being a little more sympathetic, since he has younger siblings... Not that he's not still the baddest badass ever, because he is. ;-)

Thanks for all the awesome reviews, they definitely keep me going. I don't mind anonymous reviews at all, in fact I love all reviews :-) but just keep in mind that if you ask me a question in an anonymous review, I can't reply to you (because I don't know who you are or how to reach you! I'm not ignoring you!) Happy MLK Day, all!