So... I know a few people didn't quite agree with where the last chapter ended... sorry about that, but it was necessary. Now, here you go, the consequences to Steve's and Peggy's revelation and request... and really, it all goes from there.
The song for this chapter is "Safe and Sound", now, while I love Taylor Swift's and Civil War's interpretation of it (and already used it in another fic...), this time I'm recommending Jackie Evancho's version. You should look it up in youtube, it's a bit different, and very beautiful (the vid too), and I think it fits the feels in this chapter a bit better than the original version.
Also, not sure if I've remembered to do this, this fic yet, so if I haven't, forgive me please: I don't own Avengers, Captain America, anything of the MCU really, and while Nightingale is all mine (the actress that portrays her in my head and fanarts is certainly not mine)... What wouldn't I give to own Loki though...?
Safe and Sound
One day the war would end, one day we'd all be safe.
So apparently Steve Grant Rogers, the Captain America had been dating Margaret Carter, SSR Agent for... stars knew how long. It was hard to wrap my head around it, not because I had anything against it, not at all; but because I'd gotten so used to Steve being totally oblivious to the women making passes at him, to the potential between him and Peggy... only, apparently he'd only been faking, they both had, to keep their relationship in the down-low.
"Who did you think gave him that picture?" Peggy asked flippantly.
She was talking about the picture of her Steve kept in her compass; of course, we should have realized that a man like Steve wouldn't be keeping a gal's photo without her permission, in particular when it was no secret that he had it (the picture had even appeared in one of the reels, from what I remembered). But since they'd never spoken about it, most people had simply assumed; I knew better than to make assumptions (people made such about me all the time), and yet even I had fallen for it.
"We had a plan." Steve tried to explain. "As soon as the war was over I was going with her to meet her family, to ask for her hand, and then we'd go back to the States and live there. Make new lives for ourselves with the money of my commission and her own service. Perhaps we might even work for Howard..."
"It's a good plan." I offered, not quite sure what else I could say.
"Bucky was going to ask Sia to marry him." Steve said, very quietly (he knew, better than most, how good Sia's hearing was, and didn't want his words to hurt her further. "He didn't have a ring but he thought that would be alright, she could choose one she liked and he'd buy it for her. Even though they had never made any promises to each other, Buck knew she was the girl he wanted. He asked me if I'd be his best man..."
I had no words to reply to that. In my eyes James Barnes had always been a bit of a wild-card, not only as a soldier, but also as a man. He flirted with every woman on base, even after he began 'seeing' Sia; I'd thought that meant that whatever was between them wasn't serious. Then again, I should have realized Sif wasn't the kind of woman to allow a suitor to stray, not without dumping him (and quite possibly beating him up before it was all said and done). Even then, the idea that he'd been contemplating marriage... Had their relationship really gone that far? Was it possible... Could they actually be a match?!
Sif had told me, not long after we'd all recovered our memories of Tinúviel, that after seeing Loki and I together she'd decided to never settle for anything less. She'd seen how a match was supposed to be and simply couldn't see herself with someone who didn't see her a their whole world, and whom she saw in the same light. But was that even possible? What were the chances? Sif was an Aesir, and James a man who belonged to a time when Asgard had hardly had any contact with Midgard... until our little time-jump. It was all too twisted to contemplate.
Still, none of that changed what Steve and Peggy had already said, about their plans, and what they wanted from me, from us.
"It was a good plan." Peggy agreed. "But what if that moment never comes? We might be making headway against Schmidt and HYDRA, particularly with Zola's capture... but that might still not be enough. And even if... when we manage to defeat them, there is no guarantee we will survive. I don't want either of us to go into the next life with such a regret."
"That's understandable." Loki nodded, understanding, probably better than many, where she was coming from. "That doesn't explain what we have to do with anything."
"We cannot call a justice of peace, or go to a chapel and simply marry." Steve explained sheepishly. "Or, I suppose we could, if we wanted, and if we didn't care about our superiors finding out... but we do care. If Col. Phillips, or even worse, his own superiors, find out about what we're planning, even that we're together... well, there are fraternization rules for a reason. They would split us up, send Peggy away, they might even use our relationship as an excuse to demote her. I will not allow that."
"It's also more than that." Peggy added for good measure. "When you told us your story... you said that the vows you had used to marry, they were stronger than conventional marriage, they were about forever. We want that."
"You understand that when we speak about forever, we mean that literally, and not in a figurative sense?" I tried to make them understand. "For us, for a marriage done by the Ancient Vows, forever isn't simply a concept, or a pretty word; it's a reality. We will be together to the end of time, till the last star falls from the sky..."
As poetic as the last phrase sounded, it was also quite literal, and the way Ljósálfar chose to express the sentiment.
"This is no 'until death do you part'." My match added. "You will be bound for this life, and for every life that comes after this."
"Is it possible that we might have been bound before?" Steve asked suddenly, it looked as if the thought had just occurred to him.
"It could be." My Maverick actually stopped to think it over before answering. "There's no way of knowing for sure, of course. People, mortals in particular, hardly ever remember their past-lives. And that's when they have them, not all souls are willing to go through the hardships of life more than once, not after they've known True Peace."
Thankfully neither of them asked if it was possible to bind themselves to different people in different lives; my love wouldn't have taken such suggestions kindly. There was only one match, ever, after all. That was something we'd fought tooth and nail to prove when Odin had refused to accept me by Loki's side. Eventually we'd managed, but still.
"We understand that this is something serious." Steve assured us solemnly. "It's still what we want. More than anything."
"It gives me hope." Peggy added, very quietly. "Hope that even if the worst might happen, if the war might take one or both of us... we'll find each other again."
Memories rushed through my head, hard and fast: I remembered dying, in the middle of the New Mexico desert, in my beloved's arms, after having unlocked the deamarkonian, to keep Thanos from using me against him... I remembered standing in the middle of the Throne Room, in Asgard, revealing myself during my match's trial, to speak for him, and to give him a reason to keep on living when he was pushing himself into a self-destructing path (again)... I remembered being a she-elf, pregnant, and dying as a consequence of a curse from the Enchantress. I didn't quite remember what I'd been feeling that day, thankfully the memories of my life as Tinúviel were distant enough they didn't hurt as much as some of my current one did (I couldn't imagine getting over the loss of my baby, days before I'd have given birth... somehow it seemed much more traumatic than the miscarriage I'd gone through in my current life, months after marrying Loki, at nineteen)... but most importantly of all, I remembered waking up after spending a night regaining the memories of a past life, to find my match by my side, and realizing we were meant to be, in ways I could have never begun to imagine; that we were a match, and beyond life and death, we'd always be together...
"We'll do it." I said simply, there really was nothing else that needed to be said.
xXx
Two days later everything was ready. Luke and I had managed to convince the higher ups that Steve and the Commandos needed a few days off, to get over the loss of Sgt. Barnes. Peggy too had filed for a short leave at the same time. Then, in the evening, Steve, Peggy, Howard, Sia, my love and I gathered together in the same clearing where we'd said our goodbyes to Bucky.
"So, with this ceremony, you'll be married forever and ever?" Howard, who was the last to learn everything we were planning, asked. "You die, I die, kind of deal?"
I was just about to answer in the affirmative, when Sia interrupted unexpectedly.
"That won't be enough." She blurted out.
"What...?!" None of us were expecting that.
"It takes a century for a bond formed by the Ancient Bonds to become strong enough to allow for a 'you die, I die', as Howard put it." Sif elaborated. "You know this, you've been through it, remember? When Tinúviel was lost to us..."
The memory came fast and hard, and while it wasn't the first time I'd remembered recently, it still felt just as sharp. It was true, Loki and I (Tinúviel) had been married for over ninety years... not quite a hundred, and it hadn't been enough. I had died, and my love hadn't... it was precisely that which pushed him to the edge of his sanity, which made him act so self-destructive; he'd wanted to die, in order to follow me.
"She's right..." I breathed out in shock.
"Then how?!" Peggy demanded.
Steve didn't say a word, though I could sense the desperation in him. He really wanted the kind of bond my love and I shared, the knowledge that they would be able to find each other, no matter what might come their way, who or what might try to get between them...
I didn't quite realize it, as I reached for my right wrist with my left hand, but when my fingers grazed the marks on the tender skin there... they were like scars, or perhaps birthday markings, but their significance went much deeper. The marks had been left on my skin by an object of great power, a unique relic... and I wasn't the only one with such symbols engraved on the skin of my wrist; my love had them too, only on opposite sides.
*I really don't know if that's a good idea my Nightingale...* My Maverick murmured quietly into our bond, he'd been able to follow my line of thought.
*It's their only chance, my love.* I mind-whispered. *And we both know it.*
As one, we turned to face Steve and Peggy, hands extended as a pair of golden (though they were not gold, but rather another much more durable, Asgardian metal) wrist-cuffs materialized.
"What's this?" Steve asked, not quite touching one.
"They are called deamarkonian." My love began the explanation. "A set, completely unique... you see, I created them."
"You've heard our story, or at least the short version of it." I stepped in. "You know there are things we've never told you; some because they're personal, others because they simply aren't important... this is a little bit of both. I was sick, very sick, when I was fourteen. So much it should have killed me. The demarkonian is the only reason I'm alive."
"How does it work?" Peggy inquired, thoughtful.
"They bind life-forces." My match took over. "Basically, you share energy, what is at your core. In our case, the sickness kept Ari weak, but when my energy became hers... that strengthened her, it allowed her to recover. The demarkonian didn't cure her, it just allowed her to live with the illness... it also affected us when we took the Ancient Vows, our bond became tighter much faster than it should have..."
"But, wait a second." Howard called in. "You're not sick anymore, are you? Because you aren't wearing those things right now, and you just said they were unique so..."
"They are unique." My husband cut him off. "And no, we're not wearing them anymore. She..."
He couldn't say it, and I understood it, of course I did. My death (both of them, in fact) would always be traumatic memories for the both of us.
"Things happened," I said, somewhat vaguely. "The demarkonian were no longer necessary. And in any case, that's irrelevant right now."
"What you need to focus on, is the effect the super-soldier serum might have with this." My love commented thoughtfully. "If it were two normal humans wearing them, the effect would be so small as to be considered irrelevant. If it were a healthy human trying to help a sick one... it's unlikely they'd manage... in our case, my power compensated for my match's weakness, and the differences were considerable enough that she didn't gain any great advantages... at least nothing that was immediately notorious." The magic had come later. "In your case... well, Peggy is perfectly healthy, and Steve has been altered to his core. It's likely that would slip into the bond."
"So, what? Peggy would gain some of my abilities?" It was completely understandable that Steve wanted to understand before committing to anything.
"It probably won't be obvious straight-away." I offered. "It certainly wasn't with me. But yes, Peggy will gain some of what the serum has given you, and it's possible that you'll loose a small degree as well, to balance out."
Considering they had no idea what the super-soldier's limits were, exactly... well, I wasn't actually sure if that made the side-effect something we didn't need to worry about (because it wouldn't really affect Steve) or if we should be very worried about it (we'd technically be gaining a second super-soldier when we still didn't know fully what one was capable of).
"This will guarantee that we will stay together, or manage to find each other, no matter what?" That was the deal-breaker for Peggy, for them both, probably.
"Yes." I could guarantee them that much, I'd benefited from it, after all.
It wouldn't occur to me until much, much later, on the effect the use of the deamarkonian would have on Peggy, after a certain plane went down...
xXx
The final mission took place exactly a month after Steve and Peggy's secret wedding. Phillips had questioned Zola extensively and with a lot of help from various spies, and a little of my match's magic they'd managed to make a decent plan. It was beyond insane, what with Steve pretty much walking to Schimdt's door and knocking (figuratively, he'd be on his bike, and there would be less knocking on a door, and more knocking some skulls... but still). Most agreed that the insanity was the reason why it'd probably work.
It was an all or nothing kind of deal. If we succeeded Schimdt would be defeated and one of the greatest threats to the allies would be dealt with... if we failed, the whole world would feel it. So, of course, there was no way we could fail.
I even managed to convince them to let me tag along. In the end even my husband had agreed that it would be useful to have a healer of my 'talent' along, and someone who would be able to communicate with prisoners (both ours and HYDRA's) that might not speak English.
The first part went easy enough. Steve took down as many as he could in his entrance, before 'surrendering' and allowing the enemy to take him in. Sia and a number of Commandos broke through a window and straight into the room where Schmidt had been trying to question the Captain, in the nick of time. And then, at a signal, the remaining Commandos and Luke burst in through what looked like a wall (thanks to some of my Maverick's magic). Another signal and the Colonel lead all the soldiers we'd been able to gather in the last two days, through the front door; Peggy and I were with him. I was no good with a handgun, though I still had my training with knives, and that was good enough.
Several soldiers were vaporized around us by HYDRA's weapons, and while the shock was great, I forced myself not to focus on that, to keep moving, we had a battle to fight, to win. And yet when I actually noticed one of the enemies fire their gun, pointing at a soldier running right beside me, I couldn't help myself, I was waving my empty hand before I knew it, and then the ray was hitting a whiteish-lilac translucent barrier (Which lasted for barely a fraction of a second, and yet that was enough), before bouncing back to its origin point, vaporizing the HYDRA goon instead. The soldier beside me turned wide eyes at me for a moment, but there simply was no time to focus on that.
"Peggy!" I called, making my mind in a second. "I need you to cover me!"
She was not blind, she'd seen what I'd just done, and I was quite sure she was able to follow my line of thought. She didn't doubt, in a second she was running in front of me, making sure to keep any possible enemies off me, while I began waving my hands, throwing up shields everywhere I saw soldiers being targeted. I didn't manage to protect them all, but I did my best.
Once inside the base things went even more insane. Peggy went looking for Steve right away, and while the original plan was for us to stick together, the moment I heard the cry of someone injured I couldn't help but follow it. It was my instinct as a healer, I had to help, so we ended splitting up. Some soldiers actually ended following me around, bent on keeping me safe while I looked after their comrades.
When I found Peggy again she was sitting before a communications console in the command room of the base. Phillips seemed to be guarding the entrance, keeping everyone out while giving her space, giving her and Steve the chance to say goodbye... I paid him no mind, ignoring both his sharp look and his half-whispered half-shouted orders as I slipped past him and into the room, going to my knees beside Peggy.
"Peggy... this is my choice." I could hear Steve through the radio, from somewhere on the North Atlantic, on board of Schmidt's plane, the Valkyrie. "Peggy..."
"I'm here." She half-whispered half-sobbed.
I placed a hand above hers, trying to offer some silent support.
"I'm gonna need a rain check on that night of dancing we've been planning." Steve said suddenly. "I know we've been planning it for a while now, and you even taught me how to dance, and I've finally stopped stepping on your feet..."
"That's alright." Peggy mumbled, so low Steve probably could only hear her because of his enhanced senses. "We'll go as soon as you get back. We have our whole lives... just come back..."
"We'll ask the band to play something classy, something slow." Steve stated. "We'll show everyone how it's done."
'How the marriage dance is done...' I couldn't quite remember where or even when I'd heard those words, but they'd stuck with me, and they seemed to be made for that moment...
"We'll find each other again." He reminded her.
"Yes we will." Peggy agreed wholeheartedly. "No matter how long it takes." She made a pause before adding, very quietly. "Mo Anam Cara..."
Her pronunciation wasn't the best, but still, it was the thought that counted.
"Mo Anam Ca..." Static.
Steve's voice cut off before he could finish the phrase.
"Steve...?" Peggy called, refusing to believe the obvious truth. "Steve? Steve!"
There was no answer, of course they wouldn't be, because Steve Rogers had crash-landed the plane somewhere in the North Atlantic... possibly even the Arctic, and between the water and the ice, there was no way he could answer (it was also quite possible that the radio had been ruined in the crash).
However, I couldn't allow my mind to wander through that particular line of thought. Peggy was fast approaching hysteria, and I needed to make her focus, otherwise she would hyperventilate and lose consciousness. And that wouldn't be good, not for us, but especially not for her.
"Peggy..." I called her, softly but authoritatively. "Peggy, look at me."
It took a while, but eventually she did.
"I need you to focus Peggy, just a moment." I told her kindly, before grasping one of her wrists with both my hands... or more precisely, the object there. "Look at this? Do you remember what this is? What it means?"
"The dea-marko-nia-n..." She breathed out brokenly.
"Exactly." I nodded. "Do you remember what it signifies?"
She didn't answer. I didn't know if she just couldn't find the words, or if her grief was so strong she really couldn't remember in that moment.
"It's a symbol of your bond to Steve." I reminded her anyway. "Your love, your commitment..."
"Yes..." Peggy's tears stopped falling, her breathing became less labored and, ever so slowly, her eyes regained their spark.
"Once put on, the deamarkonian are sealed, they can only be released when they're no longer needed." Usually at the moment of death, but I knew I didn't need to go into that. "As long as that stays on, you know Steve is alive."
"We'll meet again." Peggy finished for me. "With our bonds... we'll find our way back to each other, no matter how long it takes..."
Even if it took them decades...
I didn't mention there had been a time when a key had existed, for one of the deamarkonian (and unlocking one would release both). That key had been lost in the New Mexico desert the same day I'd died as Silbhé, the day when I'd left my human life behind, to then make a choice between the peace of a human death, and an eternal life by my match's side... I'd never hesitated. In any case, there was no longer a key; the deamarkonian would only be released when they were no longer needed, and in no other way.
I had no idea how Peggy and Steve would actually get to meet again. And while I had met Steve in the future (my past), I couldn't remember having ever seen Peggy in that time. Did that mean that something would happen to Peggy before Steve woke up? Or had we changed history, in a way we hadn't managed on that train? I was afraid to ponder too long on those questions. We'd be finding the answers sooner or later.
xXx
At the end of March, almost four weeks to the day since Steve had gone down with Schmidt's plane Peggy seemed to fall sick for the first time. She'd been somewhat depressed ever since the mission; she'd go on missions with the Commandos, work at the SSR HQs, sleep a lot and hardly eat, she had no social life whatsoever. We believed it to be normal, perfectly natural; she'd just lost her match, after all. He wasn't dead, of course, and she knew they'd meet again, but he wasn't there with her, and the absence hurt. However, what truly shocked us into action was when she fell asleep and then didn't wake up (no matter what we tried) for 24 hours straight.
That was the start, but certainly not the end. In the following weeks she'd sleep more and more, and every week or so she'd take a 24-hour nap.
"It's her connection to Steve." I told Sif and Loki privately one day.
"Are you sure?" Sif inquired.
"What do you know of this time?" My husband asked almost at the same time.
"Steve froze in the Arctic." I blurted out. "I don't know the exact location, I'm not sure anyone does. Howard spent... will spend, decades looking for him, only to never find him."
"Never, but then..." Sif didn't understand.
"Someone else found him, completely by accident, from what I know." I explained. "In 2010 or 2011... not sure the exact date. He was encased in ice, and somehow still alive."
"Cryostasis..." My Maverick murmured thoughtfully.
I nodded.
"The serum allowed him to survive in the ice." My sister realized. "In suspended animation..."
Her eyes widened as she came to the same conclusion my love and I had reached.
"The bond is what's causing this to Peggy." I whispered. "Steve has no energy, and no way to produce more, so it's pulling on hers. It's why she eats more, and sleeps for so long. The bond is still strengthening, which I think is the only reason that she didn't drop into a coma the moment Steve froze."
"We have no way of knowing for sure that he froze completely right away." My love reminded me grimly. "Even if he did fall unconscious right away, there's a chance his body took longer to fully freeze." He shook his head, probably hating the thought as much as I did. "The point still remains, though."
"But that means that Peggy's condition will keep getting worse, until..." Sif broke off, not daring to finish the thought.
We all knew it though.
"There's no way to know for sure if she'll truly sleep until Steve himself is found and awakened, or if she'll wake up sporadically until then." Loki said quietly. "We have no way of knowing how she'll react to all of this."
"We were preparing for her developing Steve's super-soldier abilities, but not for how it might affect her, if something were to happen to him." Sif nodded.
Which had probably been stupid, at least my beloved and I had known it was coming. And it's not like we didn't have at least some basis of comparison, I'd never forget learning that my love was being sent to the Pit, and weeks later going to sleep, and not waking up. I'd been in a coma for a month, before waking up in a hospital, with Darcy and my Maverick by my side. And there was no way of knowing how much worse things might have gotten, if Thor hadn't pushed for his brother being released from that cell, after learning of what had happened to me.
"We need to make plans." Sif stated, in a tone that allowed for no opposition. "Right now... the world simply isn't ready for Peggy Carter to disappear."
No, it wasn't, I wasn't sure it would ever be. Which meant we definitely needed to make plans, and they'd need to be good... really good.
xXx
Several meetings took place through April, top secret meetings, the contents of which only Peggy Carter, Howard Stark, the Serrures, and three other people were privy to.
In the first days of May, the last mission of the Howling Commandos happened. Peggy and Sia were there for that one. They captured Werner Reinhardt, one of the highest-ranked HYDRA members that had survived after the fall of Schmidt. They released a good number of prisoners, including the inhabitants of a small village in China (some of which had already been killed by Reinhardt during some experiments). They also confiscated a strange object of unknown origin, which Reinhardt referred to as the Obelisk (and tagged it with the code 0-8-4, to make it harder for their enemies to find it, if they were to ever come looking).
The next day, the Commandos were celebrating. The final 'head' of HYDRA had been cut off. Reinhardt had attempted to cut a deal, and failed; Peggy had felt an inordinate amount of pleasure in locking his cell personally. WWII wasn't quite over yet, though I knew it wouldn't be long (and I really didn't want to think about what was missing...).
While Peggy had never been one for drinking, or at least not in public (her standing as a woman in the military was precarious enough, the last thing she'd needed was for her to get drunk in the presence of comrades, or worse, superiors); she chose to make an exception that day. She handled herself quite well, according to everyone who saw her. She never turned down a drink and, by the end of it, she'd consumed at least as much as most of the Commandos (more than Sia even), and while the soldiers kept laughing at stupid jokes and it was unlikely that they'd manage to so much as get on their feet without toppling down, Peggy didn't seem to have such problems. She stumbled a bit when getting on her feet, and didn't complain when Serrure went to help her walk, but she didn't make a fool of herself either.
She only half-heard as the seriously drunk Commandos offered their respects to her and called for 'one last toast' for their Captain and his Agent... she didn't say a word, just walked away.
The moment we all stepped back home (Howard had insisted on buying a townhouse right there in the outskirts of London when realizing what was coming, and that we'd need a private place) Peggy straightened up, moving away from Luke without a second's hesitation. It still took us a moment or two to fully process what it meant.
"You're not drunk." Sia blurted out in realization.
"Not in the slightest." Peggy deadpanned. "The most I got was a slight buzz at some point, probably some lightheadedness, but it didn't last. I haven't felt anything in the last hour."
We all knew what that meant, her bond with Steve was fully formed and her body was adapting to the changes the serum caused (she might be getting them second-hand, but still). A lack of ability to get drunk wasn't the only side-effect, not even the most important:
"I could barely get up this morning." Peggy declared rather bluntly. "I know I won't be waking up tomorrow morning, or the day after... even now it's hard for me to stay awake."
It was what we'd been waiting for, for a little over a month; that didn't make us any less nervous though. Even with all the plans we'd made, there was no guarantee things would go well. But there was no going back, decisions had been made, the bond had formed. Both Steve and Peggy had known, from the start, there would be consequences for putting the deamarkonian on; now they needed to deal with those consequences (we all needed to).
"I'll phone the others." Howard announced, suddenly all business. "Make sure they'll be ready."
Final arrangements were made. Peggy took a long, relaxing bath before getting dressed in her favorite nightgown, a beautiful ivory-white sleeveless piece that I'd given her as a wedding present (and which Steve apparently had loved, both on her and on the floor...).
Peggy laid on the center of the bed (the same bed where she and Steve had consummated their marriage, as a matter of fact), allowing me to tuck her in, while my husband went around the room, making sure the wards were in place.
It was part of the plan, something we all considered very necessary, to make sure Peggy would remain safe while she slept (it wasn't like we could be there to guard her for the following sixty-six years or so). It was quite possible we'd need to move her at some point; and we'd definitely need to recharge the wards every so often, but she'd be safe, Loki and I would make sure of that. We'd promised Steve, after all.
"All arrangements have been made." Howard announced as he stepped into the room. "I've spoken to Dugan, Sholto and Miss Cartier. We shall meet them tomorrow morning to deal with any final details and put everything into effect."
"You will make sure Marge's alright, will you?" Peggy asked quietly.
"We will make sure everything's just fine with her, and with everyone." I assured her.
"I also promise to you, I will keep looking for Steve, and I will find him Peggy." Howard assured her. "Trust me on that."
"I trust you Howard." She nodded. "If anyone can find Steve, you all can."
"Who knows, maybe you'll be waking up next week, with your dear husband by your side." He offered as an option.
I knew that wasn't going to happen and I think deep down, instinctively, so did they. None of us said a word anyway. We let the feeling of hope remain.
"Will you sing for me?" Peggy asked me suddenly.
She had settled down, finally, a picture of her and Steve in their 'secret wedding' was on her bedside table, and she'd laid just in the right angle to keep it in her line of sight; the picture was also spelled, anyone who didn't know about the wedding would just see a picture of Steve Rogers before the super-soldier serum (they'd probably believe Peggy to be the nostalgic kind, but not much more than that).
"Like you sung in Sgt. Barnes's memorial?" Peggy insisted. "There are few things that I'd like to take into my sleep with me. I have the memory of Steve's love, my family... and I'd like to hear you sing one more time..."
How could I ever say no to that? (Not like I ever actually planned on saying no to her anyways, so...). So I settled more comfortably by her side, right on the edge of the bed and, after thinking it over for several seconds, I began humming softly, and then finally singing:
"I remember tears streaming down your face
When I said, "I'll never let you go"
When all those shadows almost killed your light
I remember you said, "Don't leave me here alone"
But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight..."
I couldn't help myself, the moment the second sentence passed my lips, memories filled my mind, and I was sure they weren't just mine. I could see my love, and myself, in a memory that began double before fusing into a single image; with Princess Tinúviel laying half on the marble floor of the Asgardian Palace, half on her husband's lap, blood staining her beautiful gown. There were tears in both their eyes, for the life already lost, of the little one that wouldn't be born, and for the life that even then was slipping from in between the prince's fingers, he was losing his wife and there was nothing he could do to stop it from happening. And all she herself could do was sing, try and pass on as much of her love as she could to her match, let him know that he was loved, he would always be loved, and one day they'd be by each other's side again (and it had happened, even though back them neither of them had known for sure such a thing was even possible).
"Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound."
And that hadn't even been the only time. By far the most traumatic death in my memory (if mostly because it was the one I could fully remember) was the one that had taken place in the dessert. That time too I'd died in my love's arms, with the taste of our last kiss on my lips, after having chosen death over being used by Thanos as a pawn to make my beloved hurt. It'd been an easy choice to make, so-to-speak; if only because I refused to allow myself to think about the consequences of my actions, not for myself, but for those I was leaving behind: my aunt, the woman I loved like my own mother (and who'd been such for most of my life), my father (we might have become estranged, but he was still my father), my friends, and most important of all: Loki the love of my existence. I'd never be able to stop thanking the spirits, the stars, whatever Higher Power that might exist, that I'd gotten a choice in the end, a choice to be with my love. Regardless of what I might have had to give up in the end, it'd been worth it. Nothing would ever be more important than the love I felt for that man (god... jotun... the race didn't matter, never had and never would): Loki, Luka, Luke, my Maverick, my husband, my match... my everything.
"Don't you dare look out your window darling
Everything's on fire
The war outside our door keeps raging on
Hold onto this lullaby
Even when the music's gone..."
So much was unknown in that moment. Had we actually changed history by allowing Peggy to survive, giving her a chance to be with Steve in the future, like she couldn't be in the 40s? Or would something happen in the following decades that would keep her from being there by the time Captain America was thawed out? If we had actually changed history, did that mean the future was no longer the one we remembered, had we missed something, or had we created a new world by changing things? And if we hadn't changed anything, what then? So many questions, and no answers at all... and no way of getting them, not until the years had actually passed.
"Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound."
After a little over four years in the past, we were no closer to finding out what had happened, how we had ended traveling to the past, than we'd been when first arriving to 1941. We had our theories of course. The favorite was that somehow we'd come in contact with the Time Stone at some point, it was the only proven way to break down time barriers. Especially considering the fact that Hakon and I had traveled back to a time when we didn't actually exist yet. Were it to be proven true, my match thought it was either an amazing coincidence or the Norns intervening; because what were the chances of yet another Infinity Stone being on Midgard/Earth?!
"Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh
Lala Lala
Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh
Lala Lalaaaaa..."
And following that same line of thought. What were the chances that, upon traveling to the past, we'd landed in the general area of the Tesseract? We'd been in Norway after all, and while no history book had ever been too concise on the exact location of the Cube before it'd ended in Schmidt's hands, it was generally accepted that it'd been hidden somewhere in Norway... That hadn't occurred to any of us at the time, not when we'd first arrived, not until much later. Especially considering that upon arrival (and upon realizing what time it was, exactly) our first priority had been to get to the safest place we could think of... New York had seemed like a good idea at the time. Not like we could have done anything about it, anyway. In the end the fate of the Space Stone had never been in our hands. Schmidt had gotten it, and in that moment it was somewhere in the North Atlantic Ocean. I knew Howard would be finding it soon, while in the search for Steve. I also knew the kind of consequences finding it would have in the long run, and while a part of me considered telling him the truth about the artifact, the danger it was, to make him change his mind about what was to be done with it... I wasn't sure anything could be done to keep it truly safe. And if anything could be done, what would that mean for me (for my past-self, for the future)? What would that mean for my love? And for the Avengers? Somehow, changing that particular piece of history seemed much more dangerous than anything else we might have attempted (and the situation with Bucky and that train had been enough of a mess).
"Just close your eyes
You'll be alright
Come morning light,
You and I'll be safe and sound..."
Peggy fell asleep as I was going through the last lines of the song. No one said a word, everyone simply taking turns to silently kiss the woman's forehead. Saying their goodbyes. Much as we might want to be hopeful, there were simply no guarantees that we would all be together when she finally got to wake up. Though she would be waking up one day; one day she and Steve would be reuniting, they would get their chance to be together like they couldn't during the war. I promised that silently to her, and it was one promise I'd fight like hell to keep. We all would...
"Oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh oh oh..."
xXx 3rd Person POV xXx
Almost four months after the last mission of the Commandos, and three days after the official end to World War II, a very important meeting took place in Washington DC. It was to celebrate the Allies' victory, and the heroes who'd been part of it all. Both those living and dead.
Howard Stark received a medal, both for his work in Projects Rebirth and Manhattan. Col. Chester Phillips and a number of other soldiers received medals and special commendations (and some were promoted as well). The Howling Commandos received the highest medal for valor, as well as special commendations, and job offers (they'd all be needing them, with the end of the war). Agents Sia Serrure and Luke Serrure and Nurse and Interpreter Arianna Stark-Serrure received special commendations and the highest medal that could be given to civilians.
The last person to be called to the stage was Agent Margaret 'Peggy' Carter, both to be recognized for her service to the SSR and the Allies as a whole during the war, and to receive the medals intended for Captain Steve Rogers, Captain America.
It'd been a subject of contention, for a while, as the Captain (officially declared as MIA, though most believed him to be dead) had no next of kin. The closest one had been reported as KIA almost two months before the Captain himself had disappeared in the Arctic. There was no mother, wife, no sisters, no one who could claim a blood relation to Steve Rogers. In the end, the closest he'd had to family had been the Howling Commandos, Howard Stark, the Serrures, and Agent Carter... and they'd all agreed that if anyone was to receive a medal meant for him, it should be Margaret Carter.
And so Margaret Carter climbed on the stage. A medal was pinned to her chest, before another was handed to her in a beautiful case, along with a carefully folded flag. All the authorities in place were treating her like a widow, and while that made her somewhat uncomfortable, she did not complain, simply received the objects, thanked everyone and went back to her place, in between the Commandos, right behind Howard Stark and the Serrures.
The rest of the ceremony proceeded without problem, and soon they were all being guided to another room, were dinner was being offered, and a band was already playing. The presence of so many high-ranked militia meant that the Howling Commandos had to keep themselves in check, unlike the times when they went celebrating to whatever bar they were favoring at the time; but in the end they did it without complaint, the last thing they would do was embarrass each other, or the memory of their fallen comrades.
After the party Howard Stark, the Serrures, as well as Peggy Carter drove together to one of Howard's houses. Agent Carter was staying with them until she found her own place, or went back to London, she hadn't quite decided yet. The Commandos themselves were staying on a hotel before going down separate paths the following morning.
Right before taking leave for the night (though it was actually past midnight already), Peggy turned to Arianna, taking the medal off her jacket before offering it, along with the Captain's, and the folded flag, to the auburn-haired woman.
"I believe you can take this to where it belongs." She offered as an explanation.
"You should keep the medal." Luke said, signaling to the one that had been pinned to her chest. "The world will expect you to have it, possibly to wear it on special occasions. It will be easy enough for you to justify keeping Steve's elsewhere, but not one that's meant to be yours."
"I'm just not quite comfortable with it, you know?" She explained, shifting a bit, even as she returned it to her jacket. "I don't feel like I earned it."
"You did your own part in the service of your country, and us all." Luke assured her. "And if we hadn't had to report Marguerite Cartier dead for this ruse to work, the world would know."
"And my reputation would be forever ruined." 'Peggy' finished for him. "It's why I filed for asylum after the last mission... and they denied it to me. Regardless of what I might have done, your superiors simply didn't believe it to be enough."
"Even right now they're trying so hard to bury us." Sia muttered. "All the women who enlisted, who fought as hard as men, or even harder... they're trying to bury us, what we did; like it never happened, like we never existed."
"But they cannot do that to Peggy." Howard reminded them. "The whole world know who she is, what she's done."
"They cannot erase her, but even now they're doing all they can to make her less." I murmured. "Ignoring her actions as an Agent, and making the public focus more on her relationship with Captain America. Turning her into a 'damsel in distress' when Peggy was anything but."
"How true that is..." The woman playing the part of Peggy Carter: formerly known as Marguerite Cartier. "I don't know how I'll ever be able to fill her shoes..."
"You don't have to, Marge." Howard assure her. "Just be the best you can be. You're a wonderful woman, we all know that. Make the best of this chance, and above all remember..."
"No one is ever to know I am not Margaret Carter." She finished for him. "I know, I remember." She made a pause before adding. "Will she be alright, the real Peggy, I mean?"
"She will be just fine." Luke assured her. "You need not worry about her. Just focus on living your life, on enjoying it."
Marge nodded before finally taking her leave. She might not know where the real Peggy Carter was, or what had happened to her exactly, to make it necessary for someone else to take her place. In the end, Marge chose not to focus on that, instead she focused on the opportunity she'd been given, of a new life, one where she was respected, appreciated, where she didn't have to sing to men who only cared about undressing her with their eyes, where everyone called her a whore even though she'd never slept with a man. A life where she could be with the man she truly loved, and who loved her in return. Aside from the people in that house, Dum Dum Dugan and Jacob Sholto were the only ones who knew the truth, and it would stay that way. Marge had no idea of what might come in the future, what might happen if the real Peggy Carter ever returned, but she chose not to focus on that. Instead she'd do as the others had recommended and enjoy her new life: her life as Margaret Carter.
So... there you have it. What do you think?
I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but the whole time-travel thing... it was originally going to be one of the AUs... also, the original focus? Not Captain America, but X-Men. Then I added CA into the equation, and began planning how the StevePeggy would be possible, and when I decided on that, it hit me: this verse is all about matches, soulmates. Which meant I couldn't possibly pair Steve with one person in one fic, and someone else in the rest, it didn't follow with what I myself was saying. And because, in the end, I love StevePeggy too much to do the easy thing and trash the idea... this became the main timeline...
Also, before someone points out that a certain someone isn't dead (because if one of you doesn't right now, you will in the next couple of chapters... I need you all to remember something: Nightingale and company traveled back in March of 2016 (my timeline is nothing like Marvel's, remember that too); in other words, they went back in time around chapter 12 or so of AoS, at least two months before certain events took place so... They Don't Know! That is very important, and will be for this fic. So, remember it please.
Next chapter we will go a bit into X-Men, not too much, only superficially in this fic (yes, that's important too, though I will be addressing that detail two weeks from now, you'll see). However, why do I bring this up now? Because I'm putting my warning for slash right here. You should be used to it by this point really, I have several homosexual couples, and the main ones all seem to connect to X-Men somehow... I won't be going into depth with those relationships just yet, or in this fic even, but I just thought it should be mentioned (I was flamed once for not warning people about one such relationship so, yeah).
Now, that's that. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, don't forget to review, see ya next week!