A/N: I was going to post the contents of the letter as a separate chapter but decided to just insert it here. Just so you know what Soda wrote.
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Dear Sandy,
I know I was scared and worried about Ponyboy and Scout being missing when you left (I reckon you heard they're home now, and okay) but I still can't believe you really left. I just don't understand what happened. I get it, that there could have been someone else, but like I told you, I don't care. Was it something else I said, or did? I hope you know that if it was, I surely didn't mean it. I meant what I said. I love you anyway. I still want to be with you, no matter what.
I love you, Sandy. I love you so much and I thought you loved me, too. I know I was a mess with the kids gone, but now they're back, and I feel like just as bad a mess without you. Now I can give you all my attention again, but you ain't here. I can't think about anything else. At work, I make dumb mistakes all day, because I am thinking about you, and wanting to be with you, and wondering why you left me, instead of thinking about carburetors or oil changes or whatever I should think about at work.
I just want to talk to you. We'll make it work. Baby, I swear, I'll do whatever I have to do to make it work. Please, just write to me, or call me. I miss you something terrible, and now that things are okay at home, there's nothing I want more than a letter or a call from you. Talk to me, Sandy. Please. I miss you.
Love you always,
Sodapop Curtis
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I walked over toward the phone, where Soda was still talking.
"Sorry," I said, going over to Two-Bit. "You know I didn't say anything. He just figured it out."
"I know. I was right there."
"What'd he say to you?"
"I got what I deserved," he said. "I wasn't very sympathetic."
"You never are."
"Well, in this case, I shoulda been."
"Then you wouldn't 've been you."
"You dig me okay, Scout," he said.
"Well it isn't always easy, but I try," I responded. He reached out and squeezed my shoulder.
"Scout?" Soda called to me. I looked over.
"Darry wants you, again," he said.
I walked over and took the phone.
"Hi, Dar."
Two-Bit made you cry?" he asked.
"He told you that?" God, Two-Bit, I thought, way to be honest. He must have known that I would never tell, but, still, he told anyway.
"It wasn't really him, Darry. I just wish … I mean, you know, I just miss Mom. She was supposed to still be here, for all this stuff."
"I know, baby. So don't let the boys make you feel bad, okay? I mean it. I know I'm not Mom, but I'll make sure you have somebody to talk to, okay?"
"I know," I said, softly. "Thanks, Darry, again."
"You're welcome," he said, and I thought – again - that if I had to lose my folks, at least I still had Darry, who was doing a pretty job in their stead.
I kept the phone up against my ear, assuming that he had something else to say, since he hadn't said goodbye. There was silence for a few seconds.
"Scout?"
"Yeah?"
"How's it going, with Soda and Sandy?"
"Good, I think. You know she's coming back with us?"
"Yeah. I'm not so sure that's the best idea, but Soda insists it's what they both want. He knows she can't stay with us."
There was another short silence, then he asked,
"Did you get to talk to her? About what you wanted to?"
"Yeah, a little bit. I was right, she felt the same as I did."
"Well, I hope it helps you to have her around, then … Soda says you're starting back this afternoon?"
"Yeah, I think so."
"Look, Scout, you make sure they pull over before they fall asleep driving, okay? I even told Soda he can use that money for a hotel somewhere. Then at least you can all get some sleep. I know you want to get back, but I don't want Soda driving through the night."
"Are you sure?" I was surprised. I knew we needed that money for other things.
"Yeah, then you'll at least have a bathroom and a shower and everything." It occurred to me that he was probably taking into account my current situation, and, again, my appreciation for him swelled to new heights.
"Darry?"
"Yeah?"
"You're a good brother," I said.
"Well, remember that the next time you're upset with me."
"I'll try."
"Alright, well, I guess I'll see you sometime tomorrow then. It's supposed to rain, so I'll probably be home when you get back."
"Okay. See you then. Bye, Darry."
"Bye."
I turned to find that Soda had gone back to the car and Two-Bit was wandering around down by the water, skimming stones. Soda saw that I was off the phone and called me over.
"How'd you get this letter?" he asked.
"I picked it out of the trash."
"Why?"
"Because I was mad at Sandy for hurting you, and I was gonna write a mean letter to her. But I never did. But I still kept it, anyway, and after I found out what happened to her, what really happened, I thought she should have it."
Soda just stared at me.
"You certainly are full of surprises," he said.
"I'm real glad you saved it, Scout," Sandy said, leaning in to Soda.
"So are we going back now?" I asked. "Don't you need to get your stuff, Sandy?" I asked. She looked at her watch.
"My Nana goes to bridge club at one. So we can go back then and I can get a few things. I'll just send for the rest later."
"You hungry?" Soda asked us both. I hadn't thought about it, but I was.
"I could definitely eat something," I said. Soda yelled at Two-Bit to come back, and he took his sweet time making his way back over.
"We're gonna go eat," Soda said, climbing into the driver's seat. Two-Bit and I hopped in the back, and Sandy directed us to a diner a few blocks away. By the time we finished lunch, it was just past one, so we headed back to Sandy's grandmother's house and she and Soda went into the house to get some of her things. Two-Bit and I stayed in the car.
"So, I guess that's it," I said. "Mission accomplished."
"Right," Two-Bit countered. "Only fifteen more hours of driving to go."
I had to admit; I was not looking forward to that, either.
"Don't you think it was worth it, though?" I asked him. "I mean, do you see how they look at each other? They were both miserable, and it wasn't even either of their faults."
"It was definitely worth it," Two-Bit said. "Soda deserves to be happy. I just wish Pensacola and Tulsa were a little bit closer together. I mean, I could do without ten plus hours in Mississippi and Alabama right now."
"Me too," I agreed. "Hey, but guess what?"
"What?"
"Darry said we can stay in a hotel tonight. We don't have to sleep in this wreck."
"You kidding me?"
"No, seriously. He is worried about you and Soda falling asleep driving, so I have to make sure we stop to sleep."
"Well, I'm more than happy to take him up on that offer, then," Two-Bit said, smiling.
Just then, Soda and Sandy emerged from the house with a couple of bags. Soda put them into the trunk and the two of them climbed into the front seat. He turned to face us.
"Next stop: Tulsa, Oklahoma." He turned the key in the ignition, put it into first, and we were off.
We were all in a much better mood this time than we had been on the way there. The uncertainty about what was going to happen had ridden in the car along with us on the trip down. But now even Sandy, who was the only one of us who didn't know what was going to happen, seemed surprisingly happy. She sat in the middle in the front, leaning against Soda, the whole time. Every once in a while she would whisper something to him and he would laugh. Yeah, the drive had definitely been worth it. I couldn't wait to get home so Pony and Darry could have the old happy Soda back, too.
Two-Bit and I played stupid games in the backseat, making up stories about people in the cars passing alongside us, just like Ben and I had made up stories about the rich parents at Darry's football game the past fall. That seemed like it had been a million years ago- a completely different time. Dally had still been alive, and Johnny… Steve had been nothing more to me than an annoying pest… and Ben had been just my friend, nothing else. Things could just change so much, so fast. I decided to think about the one good thing that had happened since then… Ben. I was looking forward to getting home and seeing him.
We made it through Alabama and two-thirds of the way through Mississippi before I finally got Soda to pull off the highway. We found a hotel with a restaurant right across the street, and Soda pulled to the back of the parking lot.
"What are you doing, Soda?" I asked.
"Scout, think about how this looks. Two teenage guys, a teenage girl, and a twelve year old? They would never give us a room."
I guess it did look a little… questionable…
"Plus, Two-Bit's the only one over eighteen," Soda said. "He has to do it." Soda handed him the envelope with the money and Two-Bit walked over to the hotel office. A few minutes later, he was out, waving us over to a parking space near the far end of the line of rooms. Soda started the car and pulled over, parking in front of the door that read fifteen. We all climbed out as Two-Bit put the key in the door and opened it.
"Home sweet home," he said, and I felt a little sad, remembering how Pony had said that when he and Johnny and I had first gotten to the church. I banished the thought and followed the others into the room.
"Two-Bit, there's only one bed."
"Cheaper," he responded. That made sense. He knew we needed the money for other things every bit as much as the rest of us did.
"Girls get the bed," Soda said.
"Where are you gonna sleep?" I asked. They both looked at the one armchair in the room.
"I'll sleep on the floor," Soda said. "You can have the chair, Two-Bit."
"Or we could just snuggle up together," Two-Bit suggested, batting his eyelashes at Soda, who immediately swatted at him.
We brought our stuff in, and wandered across the street for a late dinner before bed. I stopped at the phone to call Darry again. I wasn't taking my assignment lightly.
"Scout?" he must have known it was me, calling so late.
"Yeah, hi, Darry. I just got them to stop. We're getting some dinner, then we're gonna go get some sleep."
"Good girl."
"Yeah, that makes me feel real tough, Darry, when you say that…"
He laughed.
"Okay, well y'all get some sleep, and I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"'Kay, Darry. G' night."
"Night, Scout, and, thanks for calling."
"I do what you tell me to, you know that."
He laughed again. "Bye."
"Bye."
We ate dinner quickly and went back to the hotel. I think we all just wanted to get sleeping over with, and wake up and have it be morning so we could get back home. Sandy and I shared the bed, and Two-Bit got the chair. Soda took a pillow out of the closet and slept on the floor next to the bed.
The boys fell asleep almost immediately, while Sandy and I both tossed and turned. Finally, both of us lay still.
"Sandy?" I whispered. "You awake?"
"Yeah," she said.
"Did you get nightmares… about him?"
"Yeah, for awhile. They stopped, though."
"That's good."
"You still have them?"
"Sometimes. I hope they stop soon."
"Me too," she said. "They will, Scout."
Sometime after that we both drifted off, but then I was jolted awake by an enormous crack of thunder. I sat straight up in the bed, just in time to see lightning, followed by another deafening crash.
"Well ain't that a fine wake-up call," Two-Bit complained from his side of the darkness.
Soda sat up from where he had been sleeping on the floor next to the bed. Sandy hadn't even moved, which amazed me. Nobody in my family ever slept that soundly.
"That scare you, Scout?" The second he asked the question, another simultaneous flash and crash occurred. I could hear the rain beating against the window in torrents.
"Yeah, of course. Didn't it scare you?"
"You know what I mean." It was a well-known fact in the Curtis household that I was not particularly fond of thunderstorms, and, in fact, up until when my parents died, I would climb into their bed with them if a storm got really severe. "You wanna come down here with me?"
"No, I'm okay," I said, jumping slightly as another clap of thunder roared, then lying back down. I was less bothered by the storm than by the thought that the safety that I had felt in their bed, surrounded by both parents, was gone forever. I had thought more about them on this trip than I had in a long time.
As the storm moved on, it left just the steady beating of rain against the window, lulling us all back to sleep. As I drifted off, imagining the warmth of my parents bodies and their whispered words of comfort, I could feel my tears soaking the pillow.