Sooo I just noticed when I type too many ha's it types out Hashanah so….don't think that's what I meant. I don't know what that means. {hopefully nothing bad} but it was intended to be a series of ha's!

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BPOV

I felt as if my heart had stopped beating. Why did Edward have a picture of Ian? And who the hell was Ian if it was all just a dream? Just a part of my imagination?

I reached down to grab the picture, but realized it was part of an album. I flipped to the next picture and saw myself, with Ian, smiling. I felt sick. Oh my god, could this really have happened? Had I really hurt Edward like this? Panic filled me, when I suddenly heard the door open behind me.

"Bella," I could hear Edward's smile in his voice, "What are you doing here?" I turned towards him than, clutching the photo album.

"Edward, what is this?" I whispered, and his smile quickly faded as he stared at my fists around the black book.

"Bella, I can explain…" he began, and I broke down into sobs than, "Bella, Bella what's wrong," he asked, as he rushed to my side.

"Explain what Edward?! Explain how I'm such a horrible, horrible person," I sobbed, as I tried to hide my face from him in my hands, dropping the album to the ground with a soft thud.

"Bella, no," he said as his arms wrapped protectively around me, which only made me feel worse knowing that I had subject him to so much hurt.

"I just don't understand," I whispered, staring at the offensive book. "Who is that? Why do you have pictures of him? Why are there pictures of me with him?" I asked, but Edward didn't seem to mind my bombardment of questions.

"You really don't remember," he asked, as if there were something to actually remember. I shook my head at him as he continued, "Bella that was your husband."

My mouth fell open in shock and my eyes grew wide. "What?" I whispered in a grainy voice. "If he was my…than why don't I…?"

"I don't know," Edward responded as he gently picked me up off the floor and carried me over to his leather chair.

"But he can't be my…husband, he was in my nightmares but they were just…." I was talking to myself than, trying to make a rational explanation as to what was going on. But my memories of Edward has started out as dreams, until I realized that they were memories from my previous life. Why couldn't this be true. It all started to click, but the more that made sense the more I detested myself. I hated Ian. How could I have married him and made a life with him when all I had ever desired was Edward?

"You were in one of my dreams though….did that really….?" I stopped, biting my lip not wanting to have to go into too much detail, in fear it would remind him of my worst betrayal.

"No Bella…well at least I wasn't there. You started dating Ian after I left," he said, a pained look in his eyes. Oh.

"Do you mind if I look through these?" I asked, curiously, as I pointed towards the book on the floor, afraid I might offend Edward in some way if I picked it up.

"Of course," he said, grabbing the book from the floor and placing it in my lap. "I'll give you some time alone," and kissing my head he left the room before I could protest. I stared at the book in my lap, afraid to open it, afraid to see what was inside. Finally with a deep breathe I closed my eyes and turned to the first page, and willed myself to look.

It was Ian and I, it looked like we were going to some school dance thing. Maybe prom. There were dark circle under my eyes and I looked absent, as if it was my body that had attended the prom and nothing else. But than again that must be it, the dance would've only reminded me of Edward and make me desire to be in his arms, not the offending ones in the pictures. But Ian looked happy, as he beamed at the cameraman, apparently proud that even this trodden me was on his arm that night. I turned the page, it was Ian and I after graduation. His arm was around me with a huge grin, and I was slightly smiling but the dark circles were still ever present under my eyes, and once again I could see the glint missing from my eyes and I knew I had been missing Edward once again.

Picture after picture I looked through my life with Ian. My wedding picture in which the dark circles had finally receded, but the glimmer in my eyes that was only for Edward had not returned, and I vaguely remembered wishing it was Edward vowing his eternal love to me and not Ian. There were pictures of births, my pictures of my children as they grew, pictures of their own proms and than their weddings and the birth of their children. In each picture my smile grew a little wider but the glimmer never returned.

My fingers traced over every line of the faces I saw, but my heart no longer held the attachment to them that they used to, and finally I closed the book to a past life and sighed. Everything seemed so clear now, how could I not have realized.

"Edward," I whispered, but I knew he heard me, had probably been waiting anxiously for me to make some sort of noise to indicate that I would desire his return. Just as I thought a moment later he was through the door, but he didn't say a word, only stared at me as he waited for me to speak. "Why do you have these?" I asked, curiosity getting the best of me.

"I'm sorry," he said, staring deeply into my eyes, with his own that were filled with regret. "I couldn't help it. I always had to come back and check on you, but sometimes I would hire a private investigator to take pictures of you. Just proof that you were happy…that I had made the right decision. At first it was hard, you seemed so desolate and lost and I wanted to rush to your side and comfort you. But than Ian came along, and slowly you warmed to him, and your smile returned….Sometimes I would take the pictures myself though," he continued on, though his voice had nearly failed him, "some of those, I snuck into your house when you were away…I took some pictures I knew you had doubles to. I would smell your pillow, that wonderful smell of strawberries….just to feel like I was close to you…like it was me instead of him," both of our eyes were pooled with tears now as I stared at a man who loved me more than I could have ever realized until that moment.

"Edward," I replied slowly, "I'm not mad at you. I could never be mad at you. I'm not even upset that you have these. I'm glad actually, because they've made me realize so much," I paused than, as I stared at the cover of the book and I heard Edward take a sharp breath of air as he waited for me to continue, "My dreams have been so horrible Edward. I was so unhappy when you left. I refused to accept Ian, because he wasn't you. I hated him, all I thought was that I was betraying you. Now that I've seen these, I think that…I never stopped hating him. I just accepted that he was the best I could get. Because I knew I couldn't get what I wanted…what I needed. I couldn't get you. And I think that night we made love, Edward, is what set this off. Not because it was a mistake," I added, as his eyes darkened in what I assumed was guilt, "because it reminded me that every time Ian touched me. Every time he held my hand, or kissed me, or…made love to me…I felt like I was betraying you. And now we get a second chance, and I still feel like I betrayed you." A sob stuck in my throat as tears began to flow freely down my cheeks, "I should've waited too," I whispered, as I finally gave into my tears letting them wash over me thoroughly.

Edward didn't move, as I sobbed, and I wondered if he too finally realized just how I had betrayed him in everyway.

Finally my sobs slowed and I looked up at Edward, prepared to see fire and anger, but instead I saw he too was sitting on the floor crying.

"Bella," he croaked, through his own tears, "I was so wrong." My heart stopped, as I wondered what he meant by that statement. "I should've never let you go."

"Oh Edward," I cried as I flung my arms around his neck, he sobbed into my shoulder before lifting his eyes to meet mine.

"I would never see your happiness as betrayal my Bella, I wanted it for you. But now I have you, and I know you are fully mine, I have no doubts about that. Please do not doubt yourself. This is our fresh start," he whispered, and his words filled my heart with hope as I pulled his neck towards me, crushing his lips to mine.

His lips met mine with the same eager force, as his fingers slowly traced up my back causing me to shudder. My fingers moved through his hair as our tongues slowly entwined eliciting a tiny moan from me. He gently laid me back on his chair so that I was laying down as one of his hands slowly traced down my side, causing my back to arch.

"Edward," I moaned, "make me yours."

EPOV

Bella had just opened up to me so much, and I couldn't believe it normally I would've had to try to per sway her to let me in, but now she was willing to share everything with me. Than she had kissed me with such force, I couldn't resist kissing her back. But it was those words she had spoken that sent me over the edge.

Make me yours.

Desire filled my body as I stared into her pleading eyes, begging me to make her completely mine again. To let her know that I still wanted her just as badly, even though she felt as if she were tainted. How could I tell that perfect angel face no?

My lips molded to hers than as my fingers reached the hem of her shirt. I ripped it off of her, in one fell swoop, and smiled inwardly at her sharp intake of breath and obvious arousal at my method of disrobing her. She was so easy to read.

I kissed my way down her chest, feeling her breasts rise and fall with every rigid breath she took. I kissed her gently, staring into her eyes the entire time, which seemed to be turning her on even more, as she moaned lightly at the feel of my cool lips on the top of her breast while her fingers worked their way through my hair.

Just as with the shirt, I grabbed the soft material of Bella's bra, as I gazed into her eyes. She seemed to beg me to do it, so again with ease I ripped the material from her body, still amazed at how gorgeous she was without clothes. My lips trailed lightly over her nipples, and I watched as her eyes rolled back into her head. I liked teasing her, the fire that it ignited in her eyes was a turn on by itself. It did this a few more times, before her fingers tightened in my hair, and I knew she was trying to keep herself from trying to push my head into her breast. Without warning I grabbed her nipple gently between my teeth.

"Oh," she moaned, as I repeated the action, and her hold on my head became even stronger, causing my own eyes to roll back into my head. I released them than slowly as I kissed my way down her stomach, my fingers pinching the nipples my lips had left behind.

When I came to the top of her pants, her breath hitched, and I smiled than, knowing this would drive her wild. I grabbed the top with my teeth and slowly unbuttoned her pants with my mouth, as her eyes were wide with shock and desire. I gently squeezed her breast before letting my fingers slowly trail down her stomach, as I pulled her jeans off.

Her panties were soaking I could tell by the smell, but I shoved my nose right where I knew her nub was and inhaled deeply, making sure to rub quickly against her clit. "Edward," she moaned, and her fingers gently kneaded my scalp. I looked up at her again, a devilish grin on my face as I grabbed the top of her panties with my teeth, and she whimpered this time.

Slowly I pulled them from her body, tossing them to the floor as I appreciated the view in front of me. Bella naked, and she was leaking, on my couch. It was my wildest fantasy, but I knew I had to stay in control. I was doing this for Bella.

My attention turned back to her slit, as I slowly slid a finger along it, making sure to add more pressure when I came to her nub. Her eyes flickered as they threatened to close, but she made them stay open, wanting to watch me touch her. God, she had to know how damn sexy she was.

I slipped my finger into her without warning and she moaned appreciatively. Watching my finger disappear into her from this angle, was even better than before. I looked up at her, and her eyes were still on me. Always curious, my Bella. My tongue quickly flicked out hitting her clit, causing her to moan louder. I did it again, greeted by the same sound.

"You're so sexy when you moan for me," I whispered, unable to stop the words from falling from my lips. She didn't seem to mind though, and only moaned louder. My tongue flicked out again, but this time with more pressure, and she grabbed the back of my head, shoving me fast first into her sex. I groaned at the smell and taste that surrounded my mouth, and she moaned back in appreciation of the vibrations. My finger continued to work it's way in and out of her, and I wanted her to lose control for me. I sped up, and her legs wrapped around my neck. I felt her muscles tighten around my fingers and I knew she was almost there. With one last hard thrust of my hand, and flick of my tongue I felt her muscles began to spasm as she repeatedly moaned my name. I realized I was rock hard, and before she could fully come down from her orgasm I was naked, and slowly pushed my throbbing member into her.

She groaned in a throaty voice, and her eyes met mine, as I began to thrust into her. Her orgasm still hadn't stopped and I knew the friction I was causing was only prolonging it, which made me smile. Bella wrapped her legs around my hips, as I reached up to squeeze her breasts, gently pinching her nipples. "Edward," she was still moaning my name as she grabbed my hand, taking the finger that had been inside of her she slowly brought it to her mouth and began sucking on my finger.

The sensation of being inside of her and the feel of her mouth on my finger was almost too much, and I began thrusting into her harder. She didn't seem to mind as her moans quickly turned to half screams.

"Oh Edward," she moaned loudly, "you feel so good inside of me." Oh my god. Did she know what she was doing to me? My head began to spin as I continued my thrusting. My free hand reached down as my thumb easily found her swollen clit and began to rub it, her hips bucked involuntarily against me, causing me to groan.

I was so close when Bella reached her tiny little hand between us, gently cupping my balls in her hand. "Oh my god Bella," I groaned as I thrust into her one last time, as she continued to ride her orgasm. Our muscles clenched in rhythm as I lay gently against her.

"I don't care how many guys you've been with," I panted against her chest, "you are always mine, and nobody will make you feel like that." I said cockily.

"You're right," she whispered, in a sexy husky voice, "I am always yours."

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Of course they had to have welcome home, make up, I'm glad it was a dream sex!!! lol

Yea so you do not get another chapter….well tonight. I need sleep. Lol maybe when I wake up I can provide you with something. Although I'm assuming it'll come out as more smut right now. Would you guys mind? Did you mind the sex after all this drama nonsense? Give me some feedback people! Love you all, that's why I gave you a three chapter update!!! Haha longest chapter so far.