Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner
"Pete?!" Her voice was full of shock, disbelief and most of all realisation of what would come up in just seconds. Lucas saw Pete's brown eyes glide to his girlfriend's belly, his eyes widened and also Peyton had noticed were her boyfriend's eyes rested. Immediately she wrapped her arms around herself, somehow she wanted to protect herself for his endless amazed gaze. "Hi." She simply said and tried to touch his arm but he turned around, walked away and whispered something that sounded like: "Unbelievable."
There she stood, she was one tense figure, all stiff, that was all that Lucas saw when he stood across the room, only looking at her back. She was too shocked to even cry, thoughts sprinted around in her head, but not as many as you would think, only three. 'Pete is here?' and 'Why is he here already?' and 'He just saw what he wasn't supposed to see before I could tell him in a descent situation.'
Lucas walked over to her, laying his hands on her shoulders, making her stir out of not excepting his sudden touch but directly relax under the comfort he brought.
After a few minutes Peyton moved away from Lucas protective arms, took her dressing-gown and Lucas saw how she walked away from him, through the door into the hallway. "Joe, do you know where Pete is?" He heard Peyton's voice, he could easily hear she was about to burst out in tears. "I don't know Peyton, he said something of 'going out for a long walk'." Lucas stepped into the hallway and saw Peyton standing there, looking helpless and uncomfortable. "Does anyone know where he went?" Joe shook his head. "I won't wake up Patrick if I were you, he's really tired and kind of pissed off, you know? Maybe Andy does know where he is. Something wrong Peyt?" She shook her head, waved the issue away. "No. Where's Andy?" "Downstairs." Joe answered and than left her behind with his suitcases in his hands.
Lucas held her company in the elevator, he could see how Pete's reaction, walking away from her without saying a descent word, was making her feel miserable. The feeling loved to eat her away, replacing every single thing about trust and confidence with endless fear and being afraid about what would come up in just a minute. Feelings like those loved Peyton, loved how easy it was to caught her off guard, just with one forceful breath you could pull her off her feet, smacking her on the ground, make her cry, make her die a little inside.
When the doors of the elevator opened she immediately ran to Andy who was talking with someone. Polite she patted on his shoulder. "Do you know where Pete is?" Her voice asked shakily. "Isn't he with you? He was so excited to see you back, he really longed for you …" Andy saw the upcoming tears in her eyes. "Hey, what's wrong Peyt?" Apparently the other band members called her 'Peyt' Lucas noticed when after Joe, Andy did the same. "Nothing." She murmured when Andy pulled her to him with one hand, locking her up into his embrace. After a few seconds he let go of her and looked in her eyes. "I don't know here he is Peyt." He said and looked worried to her.
"I'm going to call Jerry." Peyton said and walked off, leaving Lucas standing there, not knowing how to act. "Have we met before?" Andy asked towards Lucas. "I don't think we have, but I'm Lucas Scott." And offered Andy his hand and both men shook hands. "Andrew Hurley, member of Fall Out Boy." He said, proud shining through the glasses before his shining eyes. "So you're the famous Lucas Scott Peyt is always talking about." Lucas nodded by this strange note for him.
"Jerry is on his way looking for him, he knows this city like no other. He's our Chicago homeboy." Peyton said when she returned to Lucas and Andy. "So he's that famous Lucas you're always talking about?" Andy asked and Peyton nodded. The look on Lucas' face must have been awful. "Don't look like that Luke! I just told them a lot about you." She said, Lucas saw her struggling on the edge of her mixed feelings.
"Why did you guys come home so early? You were supposed to say until next week Sunday." She said, her hands going straight to the pocket of her sweatpants. "Pete reported himself sick and it were only side activities we had to cancel, not something major so they let us go. But now I really want to go upstairs, I'm exhausted. See you later Peyt." He hugged her once more. Lucas began to wonder why Andy and Joe didn't went further asking Peyton why Pete stormed off and left to God knew where.
Balancing with her opposite feelings, Lucas saw the blond girl on the edge of a breakdown. "I need to find him." She sobbed and hided her face into his chest. "I need to explain things." She cried and Lucas' blue eyes were aware of the meanest woman on earth was coming their way. "Let's get you upstairs." Lucas whispered and this time he dragged her upstairs.
Back in her room Peyton curled up in a ball on the exact spot where Lucas had laid her on her big double bed. She was wasting her breath with crying and trying to speak on the same time. "I've messed up." She sobbed. "Again!" Lucas took place on the bed, tried to caress her hair, and for the first time since he remember she rejected his touch, letting Lucas lose his breath for one second. She had never, never had rejected his touch!
"Peyton?" He asked, trying to push away these sudden strings of inner pain, but he actually hadn't to do it, her eyes shined from the bitter, salt tears, her vision was blurry, she wouldn't see how his bright blue eyes turned darker.
"I screwed up." She sobbed, but this time Lucas held his distance. "Don't say that." He said softly, trying to comfort her from a further distance. "He's going to hate me forever." She sobbed, Lucas wrapped his arms around her but she immediately began to punch with her little fists in his chest. "I … I love him, I … I can't loose him." She sobbed.
From the one moment to the other she jumped out the bed ran into the hallway, for her sake Lucas was quick enough to catch before the elevator doors opened. Suddenly Peyton's legs gave out and she fell right into Lucas' arms. He quickly carried her back into her room, trying to repress his panic that got lost in his head. He carefully lay her down under the sheets and quickly took a washing-glove drowned it into tepid water and lay it on her forehead. "Are you okay Peyton?" She murmured something with a painful expression on her face. "Peyton?" He let his fingers ran along her cheek. "What happened?" She asked, her eyes a little opened, trying to block out the light in the room. "You blacked out for a minute. Are you okay now?" He smoothed the sheets under his hands. "Just tired." Than realisation hit her again, Pete walked away from her.
"I need to find Pete." She said and tried to escape the bed again but Lucas didn't let her. He placed his arms on both sides of her so she couldn't get away that easy. "You need to rest Peyton." Their faces were so close, he could just bridge the distance by kiss her, just a little, soft, loving peck on her perfect, velvet lips. But he didn't, than he would take advantage of a very messy situation, he would screw up her mind even more than it already was. He wasn't that type of guy, and she loved Pete, loved him so much.
"Jerry is looking for him, he'll come back soon, it was just unexpected Peyton." He said and his fingers played with the soft sheets. "You need to sleep, you know what the doctor said about the baby, you need to avoid stress or pressure. "But I can't sleep without him here, knowing he is out there, angry at me." She said, her voice near to break.
"I'll stay up and listen to the phone and I'll wake you up as soon as I hear something." Lucas promised her, hoping she would get some sleep and nothing of this would affect her pregnancy. The painful memories of his mother lying on the floor rushed back again, this guilt of what he had done, that this time Dan didn't had the full blame. The empty hours alone in that hospital room, he wouldn't do it over again.
Hours crawled by, so slow and painful. Somehow Lucas felt guilty for Pete not being there besides Peyton right now, like he was a part of this strange puzzle that didn't want to fit. It was around 04 A.M. when Lucas saw a screen light up blue in the dark, vibrating against the hard, cold wood and Fall Out Boy's 'The Take Over, The Breaks Over' played. As quick as he could he grabbed Peyton's cell phone and answered it.
"Miss Sawyer." He heard the voice who had to be Jerry's. "No it's Lucas. Peyton is sleeping." Jerry continued on a whisper tone the conversation. "Say to Miss Sawyer I found mister Wentz, he's in the Chicago Theological Seminary." Lucas thanked Jerry told him goodbye and than woke up Peyton.
"Peyton." He whispered in his ear, the warm breath heated her ear. "Peyton." His hands lay on her shoulder, very softly letting his fingers sink her flesh. "What's wrong? What time is it?" She asked sleepy when she saw Lucas' face in the near darkness, only the light from the bedside light was able to make his face shine into a soft glow.
"After four, Jerry has found Pete, he's at 'our church'. So he called it." Lucas answered, Peyton almost jumped out her bed to get dressed. "Take it slow Peyton!" He yelled at her but she didn't listen, five minutes later she was ready to leave. Her blond, playfully curls forced after a diadem, wearing sweatpants and an oversized T-shirt again. She took her purse from the table and left the hotel room, Lucas right beside her.
The drive to where Pete was, was long, too long. Lucas had fallen asleep but Peyton didn't, her green eyes were wide open, what was she going to do now or say? She would face him soon, maybe too soon.
Jerry stood before the huge building, waiting for Peyton to arrive. As quick as she could she made her way out of the cab and walked over to Jerry. "How bad is it?" Lucas heard Peyton ask Jerry. "Very bad, he's totally drowned under." Lucas saw her face darken, the last spark of hope was vanished from her green eyes. "I'm sorry Miss Sawyer." Jerry said and you could see how his face also had darkened. There must be something about Pete, something bad that made her hope vanish, put out the last not so bright flame.
Very slowly, full of hesitation Peyton opened the big, heavy doors of the huge building and walked in, the dull noise which filled the enormous space was made by her footsteps on the floor. Lucas followed her but after a few seconds Jerry was besides him. "Let her deal with him alone." He said and Lucas saw her walking further and further away from him. Each step made his heart hurt, ache, long, want.
Peyton found Pete sitting on a bench, his elbows on his knees, fingers laced, his head resting on his fold hands, muttering words she didn't understand because his voice was barely audible.
"Pete?" Her voice was nothing more than a few lost syllables in the air. "Pete?" She asked again, she bended down in front of him, hoping she could catch a look from his amazing eyes. She did, she caught a look, gaze full of terrible, sad, painful and betrayal feelings.
"Pete?" For the third time her voice made invisible tracks in the cold air inside the building. He didn't react, he was just like a stone, cold and hard, something that wasn't able to feel. "Pete, please talk to me." She pleaded. "I don't know where to begin." She said, her voice full of sorrow and hurt.
"Maybe with this." He whispered harshly or at least the words should have sounded like that. A piece of paper fell out his hands. 'Is Peyton Cheating on Pete?' Was the title above it in big red letters, a photo from her and Lucas was placed beside the text. And more pieces fell, all articles out of different magazines, speculating about who Lucas was.
The last article that fell out of Pete's hand. Peyton picked it up, the words on it, leaving her with mouth wide open, she felt numb, how could he ever believe those words, those terrible words, those countless lies, this everything that wasn't her?
'Pete's Girlfriend Has a New 'Secret' Lover!' A photo from Lucas and her was on the page. A close up from their tangled hands. Fast her eyes increased a few lines, the first ones. Her rage grew spectacular, if the voice in her head didn't insist that she should keep herself in control she would just have hit something.
"Do you really believe that?!" She yelled quietly. It was noting more than a heated whisper for where Lucas and Jerry stood. "I can't believe you, you don't trust me! You'd rather believe a stupid lie in some lame magazine then me, here standing before you, expecting …" He quietly finished her sentence. "My child."
Even Peyton knew he had seen her, seen her growing belly. He knew from hours before she was expecting a child, his child. And suddenly she realised how she had been yelling, that she actually was in fault, she dropped on her knees, felt a flood of heavy hormones race in her veins, she began to sob with her head on his knees.
"I didn't mean to yell at you. Please forgive me, I understand you're hurt and shocked, you have every single right to. But I didn't know how to tell, I was fault to hide it but I love you so, so, so very much." She made out between her sobs and cries and tears which flooded and made dark, wet spot on his trousers.
There followed a long silent pause, no words were spoken, only the sound of her heartbreaking crying was auditable. Lucas dared to walk closer to where she and Pete were, just close enough to hear their voices clear enough so he could understand the different words they spoke.
"And I love you too." Pete whispered and ran a hand through her golden hair. Lucas just stood there, shocked, his heart began to break into tiny pieces. He had to own this word that came out of her and his mouth. He longed for those words. Pete pulled Peyton on his lap, slowly rocked her while she cried and whispered words in her ear which made her smile, a little faint smile he caused her.
An awkward, long silence followed. Only four people in this huge building. Seconds filled with burdensome silence, which lifeless stretched out in painful minutes. Lucas was happy when Jerry finally broke it after he came back, he had walked away when his cell phone went off.
"Mister Wentz, can I go home? My father just called and told me that my mother isn't feeling well." Pete helped Peyton stand up and Peyton immediately ran over to Jerry and hugged him. "Sure you can go Jerry." Peyton said and then looked back at Pete for confirmation. Lucas had noticed she was really close to the people of the crew around her, the bodyguards, people of the management, …, just everyone. He wondered what made her change, he almost had to damage her to break down her walls back in Tree Hill and a few days ago again, but here she just let everyone in. It was confusing, so strange, she had changed so much. "This stays between this walls Jerry." Pete said and Jerry nodded. "I know, I won't say a thing." He promised. "I know you won't slip a word." Peyton answered. "And I like you for that."
"You can go Jerry, we'll get back." Pete reassured him. "I hope your mother will get better soon." He said and took Peyton's hand in his own. Lucas felt how the jealousy inside him was punching in his stomach, making him feel sick inside. A hard, painful inner punch hit him hard when Pete pulled Peyton closer and kissed her lips softly.
In the meantime Jerry had left the building, only Pete, Peyton and Lucas were in there. The tension was sharp and cutting, the way Pete looked at Lucas and the hostile look flew back from Lucas' side. Peyton felt and saw the tension flying around before her eyes. "We should head back to the hotel, I'm so tired." She said and tugged at Pete's sleeve who nodded in agreement.
The cold wind of a dark, shiny night embraced them with all his icy power. Peyton shivered and Pete pulled her closer to him, Lucas was forced to the background, walking behind them, observing Peyton when she was with Pete. He heard their voices dance around. "We really have to talk about things Peyt." He said and rubbed her arm. She nodded. "I know." She answered, guilt was hidden just under the soft tone of her girly voice.
"How far are you?" Pete asked, Peyton laid her head on his shoulder. "Thirteen weeks." She answered quietly. "Do you know I've been thinking about names when I walked away this night?" Pete said, Lucas walked a little faster, this he had to hear. Peyton had told him yesterday that if she would have a daughter she would like to call her Anna-Elizabeth and as nickname Ellie and if it was a boy she would like to call him Scott or Larry or Keith. "Well I was thinking about the songs from the band, and if we have a son, what about we call him Parker? You know, our song Parker Lewis Can't Lose But I'm Gonna Give It My Best Shot. And if we have a little girly girl we name her Roxanne after our song with her name." He said, happiness dripped off his voice, in invincible drops on the concrete ground. "That's great Pete!" She cried and threw herself in his tattooed arms. Lucas could feel his stomach twist, what about her names, why didn't she say anything about them? Did she just let him roll over her? He was stunned by how easy she let herself control by him. She turned into a depending puppy when he was around, what about the independent lady she used to be?
"But this still means we have to talk Peyt." Pete said and tightened his grip, she nodded into his chest. Jealousy was such a worse feeling, it was feeding itself with Lucas extreme feeling to protect Peyton and to have her only for him, that she would only be his. His girl.
It was almost 06 A.M. when they finally arrived back at the hotel, the dark blue sky was mixed with very bright light blue. The bright blue was taking over, forcing the dark blue to disappear into worthlessness. The clouds turned from dark and sad to light and satisfied.
Lucas wanted to enjoy this beautiful event of nature a little longer but sleep had him in a stifling embrace, so he needed to sleep this over again like every other people, like he didn't care about what was beautiful.
Pete went straight to Peyton's room and placed himself before the door, carefully following his girlfriend's movements, she must have felt it because when she hugged Lucas 'goodnight' she barely touched him. It were just two arms who barely made an embrace, nothing from the usual warmth and the cosy, familiar closeness was there.
For another two hours Lucas found himself drowned under in a strange trance, he couldn't sleep, he had knocked off the sleep without wanting it. He was writing in this weird trance, but it wasn't this intense trance that made him happy and satisfied as usual, no this trance made him feel odd and useless. The fake silence in his room irritated him, his heart began to hurt from his longing, and he longed for so much, too much maybe. Carefully he began to write is longings down, his longings about Peyton on a paper, he began:
I long for:
- Peyton to be next to me
- Peyton to fully open up to me and never build walls again
- Peyton to open my heart with the key I gave her many years ago and let me do the same with her
- Peyton to accept her sad life, her flaws, the mistakes she made but also accept everything that's good about he and her life
- Peyton to forgive me for the brainless things I did in the past
- Peyton to be my wife
- Peyton to be Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer-Scott
- Peyton to be the mother of my child, or maybe children
- Peyton to be a part of my family
- Peyton to be back in Tree Hill
- Peyton to be best friends with Brooke Davis again
- Peyton to be best friends with Nathan Scott, Haley James Scott, Skills Taylor, Bevin Mirskey
- Peyton to meet Chase Adams and realise Brooke will never be a barrier between us and our love for each other again because my pretty girl has moved on with her new guy
- Peyton to open her eyes and return to me
- Peyton to accept the fact I'm her only true love and come home with and let me be the father to her son or daughter which is growing in her belly now
- Peyton to love Lily like her sister or like her daughter, to be a big part of my little sister's life
- Peyton to accept my mother again and give my mother the change to replace her loss from her own two mothers
- Peyton to reunite herself with Larry again and hold him closer instead of pushing him away
- Peyton to hate my father Dan Scott as much as I do
- Peyton to love 'my father' Keith and respect him because he gave his life to save hers
- Peyton to pick up her special bound with Whitey
- Peyton to never lose her personality, her special being, to push away this fake version of her
- Peyton to be happy and let me protect from her every single bad thing that could happen to her
- Peyton to return the places were her mothers are buried and tell them everything she would have told them if they were still alive
- Peyton to face Jimmy Edwards' grave and forgive him for what he couldn't control
- Peyton to finished her high school and show the world she is destined for greatness, but the greatness she makes herself and not the greatness she enjoys now because other made her a part of their greatness
- Peyton to be everything I wanted, everything I prayed for, everything I wished for, everything she ever can be for me, that she just be everything and everything only for me
Lucas heard doors slammed shut and he stood up, after he was sure there wasn't anyone down the hallway anymore. He opened the door very slowly and cursed himself because is heart was beating so out of control. He walked over to Peyton's door, ready to comfort her, take away her pain, heal her. But he was brutally interrupted by screaming and laughter, he silently lay his ear against the cold wooden door and heard Peyton's voice scream and beg.
"Pete, don't do it, it tickles!" He heard her voice scream in laughter. "God Pete." He heard a moan. "You feel so good." She groaned and those words made Lucas shrunk inside. He felt how black anger with Pete's face was beating him up inside.
He returned to his room, took his ballpoint pen again and scratch on his list:
- Peyton to see my face when she making love to … 'him'