How To Save A Life

by EarthhAngel

Cole Singer seemed to have everything going for her. She was a trained hunter with a life and a college degree but when someone she trusted takes advantage of her it shakes her to the very core. Who can she trust after that? Who will help her put her life back together again?

6. Holy Water (Dead in the Water)

Somewhere there's a stolen halo
I used to watch her wear it well
Everything would shine wherever she would go
But looking at her now you'd never tell

Someone ran away with her innocence
A memory she can't get out of her head
I can only imagine what she's feeling
When she's praying
Kneeling at the edge of her bed

And she says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water

Dead in the Water

---

Cole's POV

The Lynnwood Inn: Hotel and Café

John, Dean, Beth, and I were eating breakfast in the café located in the center of the hotel parking lot, we had a copy of the Manitoc Wisconsin newspaper, and were doing some fact checking. Well at least Beth, Dean, and I were doing some fact checking, pouring over hand written notes; John was rereading the obituary pages.

John glanced up from the paper with Sophie Carlton's obit circled on it when our waitress stopped by. She was a pretty little blonde with dark eyes and way too many teeth.

"Can I get you anything else?" She asked John, using a too sugary fake voice that was about to get her nose broken. She leaned forward to gather up our plates, practically baring her breasts to the entire table.

To his credit John's gaze didn't drop once, however he did smile at her, cocking his head to the side and swiping his tongue across his lips; now in my experience that was his signature pick up line, the man didn't even need words. "No, thank you, sweetheart," he said softly in a voice that typically made me putty in his hands. His grin widened as she blushed.

I slightly narrowed my eyes before reminding myself that I wasn't supposed to play the jealous girl for everyone to see, no, that had to be for me and me alone. Still I couldn't help myself when I turned my gaze to 'Wendy' and narrowed my eyes. "Just the check please," I said cattily. She turned her gaze to me, and her smile faltered for a minute.

"Okay," she replied rolling her eyes as she walked away. Only Beth and I caught the nasty glare she shot at me. John and Dean were too busy contemplating her other 'assets'.

"Eww. Dad!" Beth exclaimed capturing everyone's attention. She glanced at me for the briefest of moments, actually I may have been imagining it. "She's got to be more than half your age," Beth said emphatically. "Plus, she's blonde."

John snorted. "Yeah Bethie, Mary was blonde," John replied, completely ignoring the whole age comment.

"Hey! I'm blonde," I said taking a slight offense to the fact that blonde jokes were about to be thrown around.

Dean chuckled looking at me. "Yeah short stack we are all aware of just how blonde you are," he said, unable to resist taking a stab at me.

I narrowed my eyes at him, sticking out my tongue. "Jerk," I snapped.

"Bitch," he quipped. Replying with our long standing acknowledgment of love in the Winchester family unit.

"What's your point Cole? Not like you're sleeping with Dad. She on the other hand practically laid everything out on our table, and I personally don't want a piece of that," Beth said exasperatedly. John and Dean both looked off in opposite directions, while Beth shot me a wink and a quick grin. That's my girl.

I wrinkled my nose in disgust. She had a point, that woman appeared way too easy. And her easy eyes were on my man. "She's right you know. You might want to use protection if you decide to hit that. You could catch something, and at your age you'll have a harder time fighting off an infection," I said in John's direction.

John simply cocked an amused eyebrow at me, a delicious half smile on his face.

Dean rolled his eyes, hanging his head. "You know girls we are allowed to have fun once in a while," he said, trailing off when Wendy came back with the check. Dean and John's eyes both followed her progress back into the kitchen, in her skank short shorts. "That's fun," he said indicating her with a sharply pointed finger.

John sighed, bringing us back to the matter at hand, our case. "Okay so let's recap," he said drawing the page of notes I had been going over into the middle of the table. Dean, Beth and I leaned forward into the conversation. "The latest victim was?" John asked.

"Sophie Carlton, of Lake Manitoc, Wisconsin. She was 18 years old. Walks into the lake doesn't walk out," Dean answered.

"I'm telling you, nothing good happens in Wisconsin," Beth muttered, she had a long standing aversion to the state since that was where she'd been when she'd been possessed by a demon and stabbed her father. "Authorities dragged the lake, and found, nothing. Sophie Carlton was the third Lake Manitoc drowning this year. None of the other bodies were found either."

"They had Sophie's funeral two days ago," I said noticing the date on the obituary John had been looking at.

"A funeral?" Dean questioned looking shocked and confused. After all why have a funeral if there was no body to bury?

"Yeah it seemed kinda strange to me too, they buried an empty coffin," I said with a shrug.

"You'll find funerals, or memorials, are often held for those who are missing, or where the bodies are never recovered. They say it brings closure," John said shifting restlessly. He glanced at me the meeting of our eyes so brief no one but us caught it.

Beth scoffed. "Closure? What closure? People don't just disappear Dad, other people just stop looking for them. Or they never start," she said her eyes narrowed.

I grimaced, taking a sip of my coke.

"What's that supposed to mean?" John asked in a quiet but stern tone.

"Beth, let's not start on this again..," Dean said cautiously, glancing nervously between John and Beth.

"No Dean, let your sister speak her piece," John said and he turned to stare at her. She swallowed and sat back a little.

"Well you know Sam's been gone for weeks now and none of us have heard a thing from him. He doesn't take my calls, neither does Bobby, for all we know he could have got an infection and damn well died!" Beth said, biting on her lip after she'd said her piece.

I exchanged a look of trepidation with Dean, holding my tongue. Beth had clearly been stewing on this for some time and needed to get it out. She'd been holding in a lot lately, what with her worry over Sam, the secret of John and I, then her own secret romance with Dean: not to mention she'd only just started to recover being tossed out a second-story window by a pissed off poltergeist. She deserved to let off some steam, especially since John was pretty much the sole reason she was feeling it.

"Sam reckons he's a big boy now, let him take care of himself," John shot back at her, and she frowned at him.

"Whatever! You know, you could have shown him a little more support. Not everyone gets a full ride to Stanford!" She snapped back at him. John looked conflicted, but he wasn't about to give in to her.

"Beth, we already went over this. Sam's made his decision. This family isn't good enough for him, he has no need for us – now we have a job to do, and by god you are going to get your head in the game and do it young lady!" John's words were harsh, but they were nothing we hadn't all heard before. He rubbed a hand over tired eyes, the first time he'd shown any chink in that armor. Beth missed it, crossing her arms and staring out the window, silently simmering.

"I'm sure Dad is taking care of Sam, Beth," I offered softly, trying to calm everything down. I said it for her as much as I said it for John, he might not be admitting to it, but I knew he was still worried about his son, probably more than Beth was.

"Don't go bringing that ass into things!" John muttered, shaking his head and I looked at him a little offended. That's my Dad you're talking about! I thought, but then I remembered our parting words to each other and sighed. John and Dad were way too alike for comfort, his standoff with me wasn't all that different to John and Sam.

Beth huffed, but seemed to simmer down a bit at what I'd said. Dean was gnawing on his lip, clearly biting back words that he wanted to say. He was still stewing over Sam's exit too, and had been arguing with Beth over it since it happened.

Wendy walked by again, drawing John's gaze and Beth kicked me under the table, scowling at John. "Get your head in the game, Dad..," she said to him, still obviously a bit pissed. Dean nearly spat his drink all over the table, choking back his mouthful of coke.

"Enough with the attitude Beth! I'm not gonna warn you again," John said sternly.

Beth sighed and sat back, looking at Dean who had reached under the table. She seemed to settle down and I figured maybe he'd had something to do with that – amazing what a simple touch could do from someone you loved.

"Sorry Dad," Beth said softly, biting her lip. John nodded.

"Can we just get out of here? Please?" Dean asked. "Before we all end up in freaking family counseling?!"

"Fine," John conceded wearily. "Beth, Dean you guys go speak with the police. Cole, you and I will go talk to the vic's family."

We all nodded in agreement at our assignments. John reached a hand into his inside jacket pocket and extracted ID badges for U.S. Wildlife Service. He flipped them open and handed them out respectively. John kept hold of Hammill's ID, passing Mayhew to me, Ford to Dean, and Fisher to Beth. I flipped it open gazing at the picture of me. My hair had been a mess the day dad had taken this picture and it was on every single one of my identities.

"God my hair," I said in embarrassment. "It was a mess."

Dean chuckled at me. "I know why do you think you got Mayhew?"

I widened my eyes giving him a confused look. I was lost I didn't get it.

He opened his mouth letting out a strange sounding roar that was vaguely familiar, but I couldn't quite pla…. "Hey!" I exclaimed in outrage. "Asshole! I am not Chewbacca… Jeez Dean. Freaking Chewie really?!" I huffed out an irritable breath. While Dean chuckled away looking very pleased with himself.

Beth sniggered behind her hand. John had an amused smile on his face when I met his gaze. He knew better than to actually laugh.

My levity was short lived as I turned my thoughts back to Sam and my dad. Which ID would Sammy have gotten if I'd been where I was supposed to be, and he was where he was supposed to be?

I rose quickly exiting the booth fast as Wendy walked past carrying a tray load of dirty dishes. And to think twenty minutes ago she had been my biggest worry. What was I going to do about my family?

---

When I realized I'd be traveling with John, I'd flipped through my contacts in the area – well, mostly Dad's contacts, but that was splitting hairs. Olivia Lowry was on the way, near Cleveland, Ohio. A quick phone call to her and I'd arranged to leave my car with her for the duration of the hunt.

John and I had been quiet as we'd left Olivia's, not saying much, both of us lost in our thoughts. I sighed dejectedly, leaning my head against the cool glass of the window feeling uncharacteristically down for the first time since I joined the Winchesters.

"Penny for your thoughts?" John said glancing at me. I tore my gaze away from the green landscape flying by out of the window to meet John's eyes. He wore a concerned expression.

"Nothing," I said lightly with a small smile. "Just enjoying the company," I said reaching my hand across the seat to intertwine our fingers together.

"Come on Nicole. You've sighed five times in the last mile. Talk to me," he said squeezing my hand sharply in a reprimand.

"Do you ever wonder if you did the right thing?" I asked vaguely. John glanced at me his brow furrowed in confusion. "Raising the boys as hunters," I clarified. "Do you ever wonder if they may have wanted something more, something better than a life hunting?" I asked softly.

John's expression changed, becoming mask like. "We are not getting into this," he said sharply, warning me not to go there. However whenever I got my teeth into something I tended to grab a bigger bite and keep a better hold, like a damn pit bull.

"John, I know you're worried about Sam. But the truth is you did the best you could do as a parent. I'm sure he knows that," I said trying to keep him calm and still be able to speak my mind. "And besides, baby he's just going off to college, not war. He has plenty of combat training. He'll be fine," I said reassuringly.

"Yeah," John said glancing at me. "Just like you were fine?" He asked.

I dropped my gaze. "We aren't talking about me. We are talking about your son," I said avoiding his question. "Sam will be fine. He's strong so much stronger than me," I said my voice rising to show my conviction.

I was silent for a moment before continuing. "By the way you were totally flirting with that waitress," I said arching an eyebrow at him and changing the subject.

He smiled, while giving me a small shake of his head. "Nah, I wasn't flirting I swear," he said in denial, bringing our combined hands to his lips so he could kiss my hand.

"Uh huh," I said unimpressed. "So then what were you doing?" I asked challenging him, although I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer.

He remained silent glancing ahead of him at the road. "I was covering my tracks," he said cautiously.

I raised my eyebrows. "Seriously? Covering your tracks? From what?" I asked incredulously.

"Well I don't know if you think the kids have noticed anything off, however I have been spending a huge amount of my time all wrapped up in you," he said, giving me a salacious grin.

I couldn't help but grin back at him, after all it was the truth.

---

Lake Manitoc, WI

Carlton Residence

John and I pulled up outside the Carlton residence. He turned to me, "Let me take the lead, anything you feel needs to be covered go ahead and ask it," John said reiterating what he expected of me. Fall in line, don't spook the family. I nodded my head at him. Show time.

When we knocked on the door a young man answered. "Will Carlton?" John asked.

The young man looked slightly shocked. "Yeah that's right," he answered.

"I'm Agent Hammill. This is Agent Mayhew. We're with the U.S. Wildlife Service. We're here about what happened with your sister," John said in an authoritative voice, flashing his badge at the kid.

The kid stepped out of the house and walked down off the porch and out towards the lake, leading us away from the house. "She was about a hundred yards out," he said turning to face us, a pained expression on his face. "That's where she got dragged down," he said glancing at John.

"And you're sure she didn't just drown?" John clarified.

"Yeah she was a varsity swimmer. She practically grew up in that lake. She was as safe out there as she was in her own bath tub." Will said looking out across the lake.

"So no splashing, no signs of distress?" I questioned.

Will shot me an aggravated glance. "No that's what I'm telling you," he said.

John looked at me as I pressed on. "Did you see in shadows in the water? Maybe some dark shape breached the surface?"

He turned his gaze back to Will, who responded with, "No, again she was really far out there."

"Did you ever see any strange tracks by the shoreline?" John asked.

"No, never. Why? Why what do you think's out there?" Will asked nervously.

"Well we'll let you know as soon as we do," John said moving away and pulling out his cell phone as he went heading back towards the truck.

"What about your father?" I pressed. "Can we talk to him?" I asked softly, not wanting to push our luck.

Will glanced back out towards the dock behind him where his father was seated. He turned back to me with a sigh. "Look, if you don't mind, I mean, he didn't see anything and he's kind of been through a lot." Will said softly.

"We understand," I said sympathetically. I turned away to follow John back to the truck.

He was on the phone when I entered the passenger side. "Yeah well the kid said he saw something grab his sister."

He listened for a minute while either Dean or Beth clarified some information. "That's right Will Carlton. He wasn't sure what but he was positive there was no way she drowned," John said.

"Okay, Beth. We'll meet you at the station. I think I saw a motel right around the corner. Uh. Hey what was the name of that motel?" John asked looking at me and raising an eyebrow. He reached out a hand to me and brushed aside the collar of my jacket, touching a small bruise I had noticed earlier this morning.

"Lakefront," I supplied batting his hand away and returning my jacket collar.

"Lakefront. Okay, meet you at the station we can go from there," he said grinning at me. "Yeah baby girl, bye," he said before hanging up the phone.

---

Police Station

When we got to the station Dean and Beth were just leaving. Beth waved us over and introduced us to the Sheriff and his daughter Andrea. "This is another team working with us. Agents Mayhew, and Hammill," Beth said as we exchanged pleasantries.

"So we need to find that motel you were talking about Nicole," Beth said to me. I raised an eyebrow at the use of my full name. "Lakefront? I think you said it was," she resumed ignoring the look I'd given her.

I nodded at her responding. "That's right."

Andrea spoke up. "It's just around the corner," she said pointing in the direction we were meant to go. "It's about two blocks South."

Dean spoke up. "Two…," he trailed off. Almost attempting to look lost. "Would you mind showing us?" He said with a small smile to her.

"You want me to walk you two blocks?" Andrea said with a smile. She seemed really sweet.

"Not if it's any trouble," Dean replied.

I smiled attempting to hide a chuckle. "He's special," I replied quietly under my breath. John glanced down at me, a confused expression on his face. Beth stepped on my foot and shot me a warning glance, just the same she didn't look real impressed with Dean. It didn't appear that anyone else had heard me.

"I'm headed that way anyway," she said, her smile still in place. She turned to Sheriff Devins, "I'll be back to pick up Lucas at three," she said bending down to kiss a young boy on the head. "We're going to the park, okay sweetie?" She asked the boy. He didn't respond and just kept on coloring.

"Thanks again," Beth said to the Sheriff, turning to follow Dean and Andrea out the door.

Dean followed Andrea closely while John, Beth and I strolled at a more leisurely pace.

"So... cute kid," Dean said with a smile.

"Thanks," Andrea said with a quick glance over her shoulder.

We were crossing the street as Dean made some crack about kids being the best, I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. What the hell did Dean know about kids?

He glanced back at John who was bringing up the rear. I caught his eye giving him two thumbs down.

"There it is. Like I said, two blocks," Andrea said, turning to Dean with a knowing smile.

"Thanks," John said with a nod attempting to hide his grin. It was no use I could see the dimples.

"Must be hard with your sense of direction," she said with a slight shake of her head. "Never being able to find your way to a decent pick up line."

My mouth fell open and I clapped a hand over it while my other hand shot to Beth's arm gripping painfully as I fought not to fall in the middle of the street in rolling waves of laughter.

I think I did really well too. I only made one small sound of humor as Andrea left with a small wave. "Enjoy your stay!" She called out making her way back down the street.

John was facing Dean with a slight smile on his face. "Kids are the best? Son surely I've taught you better than that," he said raising an eyebrow at Dean.

Beth shook me off, crossing her arms. "You don't even like kids," she said.

"I love kids," Dean said with a frown.

I finally laughed. "Name three children that you even know," I challenged. Dean was thinking really hard, his brow was even creasing. He looked at me shrugging and coming up empty. I shook my head, walking past John and Dean towards the motel.

"I'm thinking!" I heard Dean say to my back. I just laughed. God the Winchesters were a blast.

---

Lakefront Hotel

I was sitting at the small table by the window in the hotel. On my laptop I was researching the other drowning victims from previous year's Manitoc Newspaper. "So there's the three victims this year…" I said trailing off.

Dean was behind me rummaging through clothes while John and Beth had gone off to get us some food. "And before that?" He questioned.

"Yeah, six more spread out over the past thirty five years. Those bodies were never recovered either. If there is something out there it's picking up its pace," I said still reading through past articles.

"So what do we have, a lake monster on a binge?" Dean asked.

"This whole lake monster theory just bugs me," I said licking my lips.

"Why?" Dean asked moving closer to look over my shoulder at the screen.

I couldn't help the whole backward glance I gave him. It was creepy I didn't like people sneaking up behind me. "Loch Ness, Lake Champlain. There are literally hundreds of eye witness accounts, but here nothing. Whatever is out there, no one is living to talk about it," I said with a frustrated sigh.

"Wait. Barr, Christopher Barr. Where have I heard that name before?" Dean asked pointing over my shoulder at the screen.

"Christopher Barr, was the victim in May, oh. Christopher Barr was Andrea's husband, Lucas' father. Apparently he took Lucas out swimming, and Lucas was on a floating raft, it was about two hours before anyone rescued him," I said with a frown, disturbed.

There was one thing that Dean, Beth and I had in common. We all knew what it was like to watch someone you loved die first hand by evil. "Maybe we have an eye witness after all," I said with a sigh running my hand through my hair.

"No wonder that kid was so freaked out," Dean said, his voice sounding far away as though he was caught in a memory. I knew I was. The moment of the night my dad stabbed my mom and Uncle Rufus had burst in. "Watching one of your parents die isn't something you just get over," Dean finished sadly.

I sighed leaning back in my chair. "We would know that better than anyone," I said quietly, letting him know that he wasn't alone and if he wanted to talk about it I was there.

Dean sighed and moved away, going to sit on the end of the bed.

"You know I barely remember that night, just images really, feelings. The fire, the heat... then carrying Sam down the stairs and outside," he said quietly. I nodded, I could relate, I'd been a lot older than Dean when my mother was possessed and Dad had to kill her in self-defense; I had been nine, it was a little clearer to me; I just hadn't understood what had happened at the time.

I'd walked in on my mother trying to stab Dad with a knife; she'd slashed through his arm and then come at me when I screamed. Dad never had a choice, he had to wrestle the knife from her himself, and then turned it on her. But that hadn't made her stop, she'd just laughed, her eyes turning black as the night sky, pulling it from her stomach and coming at us again.

Dad had grabbed me, pulling me into the pantry and we'd stayed there until Rufus saved us.

The memories were fading with time, I found. "Yeah, I know what you mean," I said to him.

"I don't know what's worse," Dean said suddenly, frowning.

"What do you mean?" I asked, sitting next to him.

"Well Beth, she was a teenager when it happened to her, and it still haunts her. The amount of times she's woken up screaming from a nightmare..." he shook his head sadly. "But at least she remembers, you know? Half the time, I don't even know why I'm still fighting."

I frowned at him. I'd been on the receiving end of one of those nightmares; I'd seen the terror in Beth's eyes as she relived stabbing her father and being unable to do a thing about it. I was fairly certain it was better not to remember.

"You know I've had one job and one job only since that night. Take care of Sammy. When Beth came, she got added to the list, but it's not the same – she takes care of me too, you know?" Dean said. I nodded and he looked up at the wall. This was not a normal conversation with Dean; this case had obviously rattled him. Or maybe Sam leaving for college had?

"You're allowed to let him go," I said quietly, taking a stab in the dark.

Dean looked at me and I knew I'd hit the nail on the head. "I'm not sure I know how," he confessed. "Beth keeps saying he's still just a kid, and I argue with her, he's nineteen years old! But she's right. He is just a kid to us, he always will be."

"He'll be okay Dean," I said, leaning against him in a friendly manner.

"Yeah... maybe," he said. "But will we?"

"Well, you know, maybe you guys need some time, just the two of you – you've got this new relationship to explore, Sam has college to explore, maybe it'll be good for everyone. Figure out what Beth means to you now the pair of you don't have to watch over Sam all the time. Have some fun!" I was talking out my ass, I wasn't sure I believed a word I was saying, but it seemed to comfort him, or at least give him food for thought.

"Yeah, thanks," he said, looking down at his hands.

"Just don't go hurting my girl!" I warned him. He looked at me in surprise.

"You kidding?" He asked.

"Well, you don't exactly have the reputation of a virginal saint," I said to him, smirking.

Dean nodded, looking down at the floor again.

"Don't go pushing her away anymore," I said to him and he looked at me with an amused expression.

"Me? You think I've been the one pushing away?" He asked. I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Dude you have so got that backwards," he said with a short laugh. "I've loved that girl since she was seventeen years old, god maybe even earlier than that, she's the one who's been running away all this time," he said quietly.

"Did Dean Winchester just use the word love?" I teased him and he shoved me playfully.

"Shut up!" He said, getting up and going to pour himself a drink from the mini-bar.

"Have you told her?" I asked, he shook his head negatively. "Has she said it?" I questioned, pushing further. He turned to look at me, a slight nod of his head.

"You need to tell her Dean," I said, coming over to get my own drink.

"She knows," he said stubbornly.

"God what is it with you Winchesters and your damn inability to tell people how you feel?" I muttered, taking a gulp of whiskey.

"What?" Dean asked.

"Nevermind," I said dismissively, kicking myself mentally for nearly giving away my secret. "Just trust me Dean. You need to tell her, say the damn words."

He looked at me thoughtfully and took a long drink from his own glass.

John and Beth came back through the door at that point, and it was time for pizza.

---

Park

John's POV

When Beth and I had arrived back at the hotel with the food, Dean and Cole had filled us in on the case. Talking to the boy seemed like a long shot to me; however Cole and Dean so very rarely agreed on anything, I was willing to give their combined opinion the benefit of the doubt.

I spotted Andrea sitting on a park bench watching her son play. Dean and I crossed the distance to her. "Can we join you?" I asked softly not wanting to alarm her.

She glanced away then back at Dean and I. "I'm here with my son," she said. Great, the 'I'm here with someone else' card. Granted that someone is about seven or eight.

Dean glanced over in the direction where the boy was coloring. "Oh great, mind if I say hi?" Dean asked not waiting for an answer and striding off.

Andrea turned to me with a smile as I sat down beside her on the bench. "Tell your friend this whole Jerry McGuire thing isn't going to work on me," she said with a grin.

I offered her a small humorless smile. "Oh, I don't think that is what this is about," I said playing the devil's advocate.

"And you know your work colleague well enough to vouch for that do you?" She asked with a smile.

"Pretty well, I practically raised him – he's like a son to me," I said with a chuckle.

"Oh," she said, not sure how to answer that.

"Has Lucas said anything about what happened to his father?" I asked Andrea, as we watched Dean approach Lucas.

"No. He hasn't said a word, not even to me. Not since…. his dad's accident."

"Dean went through a similar thing when he was four years old," I said with my eyes on my son as he sat down and started trying to engage Lucas in a chat.

Andrea looked at me, a curious expression on her face.

"His mother died in a house fire and after that, he sort of shut down for a long time," I commented. Dean had stopped talking after Mary died, he just sat there, staring at Sam and watching over him. He wouldn't leave the baby alone, saying it was his duty now to take care of Sam. He'd been doing it ever since.

"What changed?" She asked, nodding at Dean and indicating that he was obviously a talker now.

"Oh, well he had to look after his brother. The baby was only six months old when they pulled him out of the fire, Dean sort of took him on as a responsibility when their dad was having a hard time of things," I said. I looked down at my hands and wondered if perhaps I hadn't been a little too hard on him, expected a little too much. I pushed the thought out of my mind as soon as it came up, there was no use second guessing myself, I'd done what I had to in order to keep the boys safe, to keep Beth safe.

"Well... it does sort of give me hope," Andrea said, looking over at Dean with new eyes.

Dean was walking back toward us, having finished his talk with Lucas. He grimaced as he reached us.

"Kid just talked my ear off," he said with a grin, shaking his head at me a little.

Andrea laughed. "Yeah, he's been the real chatterbox since his father's accident," she said sarcastically.

"Yeah we heard," Dean said, glancing at Andrea. "Sorry."

"Thank you," She said quietly.

"What do the doctors say?" I asked curiously.

She sighed. "That it's a kind of Post-Traumatic Stress."

I nodded sympathetically. I knew something about that. "That can't be easy for either of you."

"We moved in with my dad. He helps out a lot," she said with a small sad smile, glancing back at Lucas. "It's just when I think about what Lucas went through. What he saw…" she trailed off.

Dean and I exchanged a small look of understanding.

"Kids are strong. You'd be surprised what they can deal with," he said, attempting to reassure her.

"You know he used to have such life. He was a little hard to keep up with actually," she said looking to both of us with a smile. "Now he just sits there, drawing those pictures and playing with those army men. I just wish…" She trailed off as Lucas came to us holding out a picture to Dean. "Hey sweetie."

Dean took the picture. "Thanks. Thanks Lucas," he said and we exchanged another look.

Andrea watched him go, a sad expression on her face.

---

Motel Room

Cole's POV

The boys were off interviewing Andrea about Lucas, and so I took the time to look around the motel room, contemplating.

Beth came out of the bathroom, toweling off her hair from her shower.

"What's up?" She asked, seeing my look of concern.

"So, where are we all sleeping tonight?" I asked, raising my eyebrow at her.

Beth stopped and looked around too, chewing on her bottom lip.

"Guess you and I are sharing," she said with a grin. We always shared, so it was kind of a given.

"Yeah," I sighed. "Damn."

She laughed at me and shook her head. "You've been spoiled; try living like this for a few years every damn day then you can talk to me about sexual tension."

"I don't know how you do it," I muttered, shaking my head, I looked over the layout of the room, making a decision. "Okay, I want the side facing John then," I said with a grin.

"Done," she laughed, and tossed her bag between our bed and the wall.

"Will Dean sleep in with John? Why does that seem just... wrong?" I asked her.

Beth laughed. "He'll probably take the couch," she said, gesturing to the three seater couch shoved in the corner of the room. "It's long enough."

She went about setting the bed up for him, getting some spare sheets and a pillow out of the closet. She topped it all off with a blanket and I shook my head.

"You're like their mother hen," I commented with a smirk.

Beth shrugged and looked at me. "Should see us on laundry day," she laughed and I shook my head. The Winchesters had the strangest family dynamic in the world.

"Soooo... you and Dean?" I asked her, and she glanced over at me.

"Yeah?" Beth asked, shrugging. "What about us?"

"Anything you want to tell me?" I prodded, and she looked at me confused.

"Not really, why? Anything you think I should be telling you?" She asked with a smirk.

"Oh I don't know, just seemed like you'd tell me when you go and say 'I love you' to the man of your dreams," I said with a grin, sinking down on the bed.

"What? He told you that?" Beth asked, looking a little flushed.

"Well, I had to practically drag it out of him," I told her. She looked over at me, a curious expression on her face.

"What about you and Dad?" Beth asked, crossing her arms and turning the tables on me.

"What about us?" I asked coyly. She came over and pushed me back on the bed, pinning my arms above my head while she sat on my waist, grimacing a little at the pain that shot through her side at the action, she still hadn't fully recovered from her two-story dive.

"Tell me!" She laughed and I giggled.

"I told him okay?" I said with a big goofy grin.

"And?!" She asked, exasperated.

I rolled my eyes. "First time he said it was on a drunken phone call to me three nights ago, why do you think I'm here?"

She sat back, thinking, but she didn't get off me. I felt like all the air was being pushed out of me.

"Can't... breathe…" I over exaggerated to her; she grinned and eased up a little.

"So tell me," I said with a grin. "How does Dean like this position?" She gasped and rolled off me, coming up to look at me with a red flush across her face.

"I wouldn't know," she said coyly, raising her eyebrow.

"What, you guys haven't...?" I trailed off and she shook her head.

"Damn girl, what the hell are you waiting for?!" I asked, thinking she was a little mad.

"Well, we've kind of not really been alone to take advantage of the fact, and whenever we have been, well, I was in too much pain from the fall, or we were interrupted," Beth said, reaching to her side and tentatively touching it with a sharp intake of breath.

"Ouch," I said to her, grimacing. "Well that sucks, John and I pretty much go at it like rabbits whenever we're around each other."

"Ewwww! I don't need to know that!" Beth said with a screwed up nose. I grabbed her arm and pulled her gently back on to the bed, rolling her over so that this time I was pinning her down.

"John likes it like this," I said with a smile.

"Oh my god Cole, you're scarring me for life here!" Beth said closing her eyes as if to block out the image I had just put in her head.

"Suck it up sunshine! I gotta talk to someone about this or I'm gonna die!" I laughed.

"Looks like you'll be lonely tonight, can't say Dad has a plausible excuse for getting you in his bed," Beth chuckled and I groaned.

"I'm sure we'll figure something out," I said with a smile after careful consideration.

I looked at her, wondering at her aversion to thinking about John in that way. It's not like he was her real father or anything. Sure, they had that kind of a relationship now, and I genuinely thought she saw him as her father; still, the man was hot!

"You can't tell me you haven't looked at John and thought about how freaking hot he is at least once," I said to her. "Maybe when you were first with them? Before he became more like your dad?"

Beth averted her eyes and shifted a little uncomfortably under me, grimacing.

"You did!" I said triumphantly and she looked back at me.

"Shut up!" She said with a laugh. "Well he is like an older version of Dean you know. Oh I'm so going to Hell for even thinking that!"

The door opened and Dean came in, his eyes widening at the sight before him. He glanced back at John and chuckled.

"Well, hello ladies... when the boys are away, the girls will play..." he grinned, winking in our direction.

John frowned and shook his head, the slightest smile on his face.

"That would be slightly amusing Dean if it weren't for the fact that you're ogling off your sisters," he said to Dean, slapping him upside the head.

I grinned, and raised my eyebrow suggestively at him. He watched me and licked his lips, that one little motion telling me everything I needed to know. He wanted me, he wanted me bad.

"Ladies," John said with a grin, passing us on the bed and putting a bottle of whiskey on the table.

I rolled off Beth and helped her to get up. Dean paused and gave her a concerned look when she groaned at the over-stretching of her side where she'd been partially impaled by a piece of timber. John silently handed her a glass of whiskey at the groan and she took it, knocking it back with a grimace.

"Thanks Dad," she said with a smile, he nodded and smiled back.

"Easy duties for you this case Bethie," he said to her. "I don't want you re-opening that wound or doing anything worse," she nodded and sat down at the table, helping herself to a piece of pizza.

A few hours later and we were all getting ready to settle in for the night. Beth and I were in one queen sized bed, while John had claimed the other, just as we'd suspected. Dean had taken the couch and was currently tossing and turning trying to get comfortable. I lay on my side staring at John, and he was doing his best to ignore the fact that I was.

His eyes flicked to mine a couple of times and I smiled, licking my lips. I wasn't sure how I was going to get through tonight without feeling him against me for at least part of it.

I heard Dean's breathing even out and turned my head to the side to see Beth's face peaceful and sleepy. I flicked my eyes to John who had gotten up to pour himself a drink from the mini bar.

He returned to the side of my bed and leaned down, brushing his lips across my own, his kiss strong and warm, the taste of whiskey on his breath.

"Go to sleep," he said simply, and returned to his bed. He took a final drink from his glass and then turned out the light. "Good night Nicole," John said softly, and I sighed. Damn him.

The house I was in looked so much bigger than I remembered it, the doorways so much taller, the hallway so much longer. I ran down it, the floorboards beneath my feet seeming to stretch out forever. My heartbeat echoed loudly in my ears, the sound of blood rushing as I fought to stay ahead of my predator.

I turned and she was following me, her eyes as dark as night. I fell, tripping over a rug, and scrambled back as she brought out a knife, looking at me with those big black tar pits. I saw the knife come down toward me, the silver glinting in the moon light. I screamed as the blade entered me...

I sat up in bed with a start, gasping for air. It took me moment to get my bearings, and then I realized I was in a motel room with the Winchesters. Beth rolled over sleepily, reaching a hand out to me.

"You okay?" She whispered.

"Yeah, go back to sleep baby girl," I said to her. She closed her eyes and rolled over again.

The room started to close in on me and I was starting to find it hard to breathe. I had to get outside. Slipping my feet into my shoes, I pulled a sweater on over my pajamas and stepped outside, taking the room key with me, just in case I locked myself out.

Once outside, I was able to breathe again, the world opening up to me. I was never good in tight places after that night in the pantry, hiding from my possessed mother.

I leaned against the Impala, looking up at the night sky and breathed deeply.

"Are you okay?" John's voice sounded behind me and I turned around sharply. I hadn't heard him follow me.

"Yeah, just a nightmare," I said to him, smiling softly.

He came over and pulled me into his arms, holding me against his warm body. I leaned into him gratefully, listening to his slow beating heart under my ear. Without saying a word, John brushed his hand under my chin, lifting it to nip softly at my bottom lip, smoothing the tiny little indent over with his tongue.

I moaned, leaning in to the kiss, my head tilted at an impossible angle. I felt his hands slide around my waist, lifting me to sit on the trunk of the Impala so I was the same height as him. I grinned, pleased with this arrangement, and wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him in close.

His lips kissed their way along my neck and down my collarbone, pushing back the jacket slightly so he could slide his hands under my pajama top, coming up to caress my breast. I moaned, leaning back slightly as he pushed the top all the way up to take a nipple in his mouth, his tongue lavishing it with attention.

I wondered how practical it was to make love right now on the Impala, and almost giggled at the thought of Dean's look of horror if he were to see. As it was I was in a fairly inappropriate position, my hands wrapped around John's head as he continued to suckle at me, sending shockwaves down my body. God, what couldn't this man achieve with his mouth?

"Oh!" Beth's startled voice stopped us in our tracks. I swear John went a shade whiter. He pulled back hastily, covering me up. "I was coming out to check on you... Oh, no, I so didn't just … oh! God!" Beth covered her face and shook her head. "Man! You guys should give someone a little warning."

"Sorry," I laughed at her. I wasn't really. John shifted uncomfortably next to me.

Beth looked at us both and waved her hand in the air. "Carry on..," she said with a sigh, and she walked back into the motel room, shutting the door.

John was frowning at the door. "She took that rather well..." he said quietly, turning to look at me.

"Yeah..." I said, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. "About that...she's kind of known for weeks now." John's mouth dropped open.

"You told her?" He asked with a frown.

"What? No! She saw us in the garage kissing," I told him.

"Oh... well, I have to say, the attitude might be starting to make a little more sense now," he said thoughtfully. He pondered the last few weeks a bit and then shrugged. "Well, nothing I can do about that now," he said with a grin. He moved in close again, his hands sliding up under my top, running along my lower back as he kissed me again. I moaned and wondered how comfortable the back seat of the Impala was, I had the feeling we were about to find out.

---

Hotel Room, Lakefront
Next Morning

Cole's POV

I stepped out of the shower and toweled off, slipping into a fresh pair of underwear and new jeans and a button-down top. Using the towel to dry off my hair, I stepped back into the motel room. Dean and Beth had disappeared at the crack of dawn, before either John or I had woken. He had still been sleeping soundly in bed when I went to take a shower.

By the time I had finished, Dean and Beth were back, dressed in sweatpants and hoodies like they'd been for a jog. They looked a little flushed and I wondered if it was from a jog or something else. Beth wasn't giving anything away when I looked at her.

"So I think it is safe to say we can rule out Nessie," Beth said as she and Dean stepped into the room.

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused. John shot them both a questioning glance.

"We just ran by Will Carlton's house, there was an ambulance outside. He drowned," Dean said glancing between me and John.

"Did uh we mention he drowned in the kitchen sink and uh, not the lake?" Beth commented.

I raised my eyebrows. "Wow and uh here I used to believe no one could actually drown in a kiddie pool. But a sink? Just wow," I thought I did really well, because I desperately wanted to laugh, I had a sick sense of humor.

"I know right? What the hell!" Beth exclaimed.

"So you were right Cole, this isn't a creature; we're dealing with something else," Dean said to me.

"Yeah but what the hell could it be?" I asked in frustration.

"I don't know. Water wraith maybe?" John offered. "Some kind of demon? I mean it's got to be something that controls water."

"Wait a minute," Beth said thoughtfully. "Water that comes from the same source."

"The lake," she and John exchanged an excited look. "Which would explain why it's upping the body count; the lake will be dry in a few months," John said.

"Yeah. Whatever this thing is, whatever it wants it is running out of time," Beth reminded us all.

"Here's a comforting thought," I said jumping into the middle of their brainwave. "If this thing can get through the pipes. It can get to anyone, anywhere," I said soberly. "This is gonna happen again soon," I said as Dean moved to one of the chairs at the table.

"And we know one other thing for sure," John said stepping up to let him by. "We know that this has got something to do with Bill Carlton," he said glancing at me.

"Yeah it took both of his kids," Dean said.

"I think it's going after anyone Carlton cared about," I said suddenly. "Yesterday, Beth and I were asking around while you guys were out. Chris, Lucas' father, was Bill Carlton's godson," I explained.

Dean and Beth exchanged a look. "Well what do you say you and I go and pay Bill a visit?" Dean asked Beth soberly. She nodded in agreement. They both took a few minutes to change into their street clothes and gather a few things and then Dean grabbed the keys to the Impala, slipping his leather jacket on.

"Ready?" He asked Beth and she nodded. "Okay, well, we'll see you guys later; we'll call if we find anything."

"Stay safe," John said with a nod, barely even looking up from his journal. They left and I crossed to the door, waiting.

I listened for a minute before dead bolting the door, adding the chain to it for extra measure. The minute I heard the Impala roar to life, I turned around with an excited grin. Alone at last.

I made my way to John. "So what now?" I asked quietly. For some reason my mouth felt unbelievably dry. I licked my lips nervously. I'd done more with this one man than I had dared to with any other. He loved me and I loved him. Why was I so nervous now?

I had been excited at the prospect of some alone time with him two seconds ago now I felt scared to death. What was I expected to do?

John tossed his journal aside, standing up and taking a step forward to frame my face with his hands. "Whatever you want to do. This is your time," he said softly, quietly.

I rose up on my tiptoes to press a kiss to his mouth. He didn't attempt to take control, or teach me. He simply allowed me free reign.

I pressed kisses down his jaw line, slow methodical experimental kisses. The fervor and hunger that was always present when John and I got together wasn't there this time. I almost felt like I was doing something wrong, because I felt almost nothing. No all consuming passion, no elemental hunger, no animalistic lust: just quiet acceptance and devotion.

I raised my eyes to John's; he didn't appear to be in any hurry. Just willing to be there for me, whatever I needed. I was so sick of needing him to numb the pain. For once I wanted him because I was in love with him not because I was damaged or broken. "I love you," I declared in a small voice barely above a whisper, but I was certain he heard me. "Make love to me," I said; not a question but a request. I loved him, with everything in me.

He brought his hands up to cup my face, and I swear my skin tingled and electricity arced between our bodies everywhere he touched me. He tangled one hand in my hair, gently pulling my head back so he could take possession of my mouth. This kiss was so sweet, I moaned into it, whimpering softly. I brought my hands up to cup his face one hand rubbing along his bearded jaw, reveling in the friction it created.

His hands moved to the shirt I was wearing. I didn't move a muscle, afraid to break the spell we were under. He slipped one button out of its hole placing a kiss where the fabric had been, his thumb brushed along my skin, sending shivers down my spine at the slightest touch. Another hot kiss, another button, moving his way down my body. John peeled off his own shirt between kissing me and removing the final button, both falling to the floor forgotten.

When he reached the top of my jeans, I shuddered. He slipped them over my hips and down my legs, his hands tracing every inch of skin as they fell. He removed his own jeans before standing to kiss me again. His mouth moved a tiny bit more possessively over mine.

I was feeling it now, the urgency and hunger was picking up steam. John walked us backwards to the nearest bed: thankfully it was his. Beth might be a bit peeved if she knew we'd done this in the bed she and I shared.

John followed me down to the bed, his larger body blanketing mine. He kissed me again urgently. I moaned, baring my throat to him as he kissed his way down my neck to my breasts. The electricity was going straight to my center, long slow delicious tendrils of heat.

I gasped in delight as his mouth found my breast, his tongue and teeth teasing my nipple into a taut peak. His skilled mouth was suckling so strongly I was sure I would have bruises when we were done today.

His hands roamed my body sending my sensitive nerve endings into overdrive, as his hand trailed down my abdomen, to my core. I stiffened in anticipation, ready, and waiting. John drew back. "Are you okay?" He asked in concern.

"I'm fine, if you stop what you're doing, you're going to die," I said a little harshly. No more of this teasing bullshit. I wanted him, without one of us having a complete meltdown. He paused hesitating.

I bucked my hips into his distracted hand, whimpering, urging him to continue.

My phone started ringing. "Oh my god are you freaking kidding me?" I complained as I rolled away from John's hand to answer it.

"Hello?" I growled into the phone. This damn well better be life or death.

"Cole, hey, we think we found something. We went to see Bill Carlton and got nowhere, so then we decided to go and see Lucas again," Beth said explaining, well more like rambling. I was only half paying attention.

John was pressing kisses down the center of my neck to the top of my spine. He snaked one arm around me, drawing me back into him. His hand found my center wet and ready for him, I fought back a moan, tossing my head back onto his shoulder.

"Well Lucas helped Dean out a bit but we are kind of searching for a needle in a haystack. We could use your guys' help," Beth said apologetically.

"Uh huh," I said, to show I was almost listening. I panted and bucked my hips into John's hand as his thumb worked my clit, pushing a finger inside of me.

"Um Cole, what are you doing?" Beth asked curiously. It must have dawned on her. "Ewww! You know what don't tell me. Yuck!" She said in a whisper, apparently Dean was within hearing distance.

"Oh gross. God. Oh nasty! OK um you guys just um carry on or whatever, and uh Dean and I will call you when we know something, anything else." I muttered my agreement and something inside Beth seemed to change. "Ya know what? No both of you come help us – Dad wouldn't let Dean and I get away with this, if he knew about us. What the heck happened to my light duties on this case?" Beth said hurriedly, getting irritated.

John adjusted the angle of his hand hitting a sweet spot inside me, and I moaned, right into Beth's ear, she made noises of protest while John pressed his mouth to my ear. "Get off of the phone," he growled at both of us.

"Oh my God!" Beth said, mortified. "I'm scarred for life here!" I whined as he pressed his thumb harder into my clit. "Get your asses out here and help us!" She snapped at me hanging up the phone.

---

Unknown Residential Neighborhood

I picked up my phone and called Beth. We'd found the church and the yellow two storey house we were searching for.

The Impala pulled up where we were sitting on the tailgate. Beth and Dean got out and walked up to us. "Cole and I are going to talk to the boy. You guys canvass the area see what else you can find," John said glancing between Dean and Beth.

Dean had pulled out the picture Lucas had drawn, while I moved in to get a better look. It was definitely the house. Right down to the church across the street and the play fence in the yard.

John and I walked together up to the house. I knocked on the front door and pulled out my badge.

An elderly woman came to the front door smiling at us. "Can I help you?" She asked kindly with a slight smile.

"Yes ma'am, my name is agent Mayhew, this is agent Hammill. We're with US Wildlife Service. Would you have minute to answer some questions for us?" I asked the woman kindly.

"I do believe I can spare a few moments," she said curiously, letting us in and showing us into her living room. "Now, what can Martha Sweeney do for the US Wildlife Service?" She asked with a smile.

"We're sorry to bother you ma'am, but does a little boy live here by chance? Might wear a blue ball cap, and ride a red bicycle?" John asked the woman gently. It was never easy to question family. We never knew what we were stepping into.

"No sir, not for a very long time," the woman said shakily. "Peter has been gone thirty five years now," Mrs. Sweeney said moving to show us a picture. "The police never…I never had any idea what happened. He just disappeared," she said sadly turning to us with wide eyes.

John shifted beside me, his gaze turning to some small army men toys; he nudged me to get my attention, nodding at them. I'd seen Lucas pulling them out at the police station. Odd coincidence.

"Losing him, you know it's worse than dying," she said tearing up. I moved to stand next to her taking her hand in a silent gesture of attempted comfort. How did one ever get over something like this?

"Did he disappear here? From this house?" John asked pressing on. I shot him a warning glance, which he pointedly ignored as Mrs. Sweeney answered.

"He was supposed to ride his bike straight home after school. And he never showed up," she said her voice getting pitchy with unshed tears.

John moved away to examine a few pictures, plucking one off of a mirror, of two boys one I recognized as Peter Sweeney, the other I didn't. John was reading the back while I looked over the front of the picture.

"Peter Sweeney, and Billy Carlton 1970," John said in resignation.

John and I made our way back outside to talk with Dean and Beth.

"Anything?" I asked. Beth shook her head in the negative. "Hon, are you okay you're looking a little green," I asked.

"Yeah I'm not feeling my best," she said with a small shrug. "But it doesn't matter, there's work to be done," she said resolutely, gazing at John with a stern look to indicated she was not impressed with the earlier phone call. "What did you guys find out?" She asked.

"Ok so this little kid Peter Sweeney vanishes, and somehow all of this is connected to Bill Carlton," I said repeating the next puzzle piece John and I had found.

"Yeah Bill sure as hell seems to be hiding something huh?" Dean said glancing at Beth as I finished. She nodded in agreement with Dean's statement.

"And Bill, the people he loves, they're all getting punished," Beth chimed in.

"So what if Bill did something to Peter?" Dean asked.

"What if Bill killed him?" John countered.

"Yeah well then Peter's spirit would be furious, it would want revenge, it is possible," Dean said in agreement.

John looked at Beth worriedly. "Beth you really do look a little pale. Why don't you go ahead and take your sister back to the motel Dean? Cole and I can handle Carlton. We'll call you if we need you guys for anything," John said.

---

Carlton Residence

John walked up to the door of Bill Carlton's place and knocked so loudly I was afraid he'd beat down the door. When we got no response, I glanced around towards the dock of the lake. Carlton wasn't anywhere in sight.

"Mr. Carlton!" John called out, walking around the side of the house. I remained by the windows looking in through them attempting to spot him, nothing.

I heard the revving of an engine, and glanced around, out towards the lake, I spotted Bill Carlton steering a small speedboat out onto the lake.

"John, check it out. He's lost two kids and a godson to water and he's steering out onto the lake. He might deserve to die," I said dryly as John and I glanced at each other then took off towards the dock. We pounded down toward the end of the pier as far as we could go, calling for Carlton to come back.

He looked back at us, and the next thing we knew his boat was blasted sky high out of the water by something neither of us saw.

John sighed in frustration at losing another victim to this damn spirit. He turned and narrowed his eyes at me. "You were saying?" He said through clenched teeth.

My eyes widened in disbelief. I raised my arms in a dismissive shrug. "What I'm not the one who freaking set Tahoe Tessie on him. Besides the more we learn about this guy the less I like him. He's looking less and less innocent and more like a monster himself," I said exasperatedly.

John sighed. "Whatever it's all probably over now, the spirit got his revenge on Carlton. He should be at rest now," I nodded in agreement.

"We need to call the Sheriff out here before some nosy neighbor does and we are painted as the last people to see him alive," I said tiredly. As glib and sarcastic as I tended to be, I hated losing innocents too, although I was pretty sure that Bill Carlton was no one's innocent.

---

Sherriff's Office

John and I walked tiredly into the police station as Dean and Beth were rounding the corner walking up to the station from the motel, Sheriff Devins in front of us. I spotted Andrea and Lucas sitting behind the counter, apparently she'd been waiting for her dad.

"Nicole. John. Dean. Beth," she said looking at us curiously. "I didn't expect to see you here," she said offering us a smile.

Devins turned his back to us waving a hand in our direction. "So now you're on a first name basis?" He asked his daughter. I shot a dark glance at his back. Dick. "What are you doing here?" He asked Andrea in a low voice.

"I brought you dinner," she responded.

"Oh I'm sorry sweetheart; I don't really have the time," Devins apologized shrugging out of his jacket. John and I shot each other a quick glance that said it all. How were we going to get out of this one?

"I heard about Bill Carlton. Is it true is something going on with the lake?" She asked her dad worriedly.

"Right now we don't know what the truth is," Devins responded wearily. "But I think it might be better if you and Lucas went on home."

I was only half listening to their conversation, my eyes were on the boy. Apparently I wasn't the only one, Dean was looking worriedly at Lucas too. The boy looked upset, his brow was furrowing, and suddenly he shot out of his chair launching himself at Dean, tugging wildly on his arm and whimpering.

"Lucas, hey, what is it?" Dean asked worriedly. He wouldn't get a response, whatever was up with this kid, and I was beginning to think he had some psychic abilities, whatever this kid had seen had messed him up for a good long while. "Lucas, Lucas. It's okay, it's okay, hey Lucas it's okay," Dean said trying to reassure the kid.

"Lucas." Andrea said worriedly coming to wrap her arms around her son, trying to get him to relinquish his hold on Dean. Lucas let go of Dean and allowed his mom to lead him out of the police station but his eyes remained on Dean all the way out of the door.

I glanced worriedly at Beth. If the kid really was some kind of psychic and he was tapping into what was happening around the lake, if Peter's spirit had gotten revenge on Bill, shouldn't his psychic tendencies be slowing up a bit now? Beth gave a small shrug at the unspoken question in my mind.

I glanced at Beth and Dean and both looked troubled by the display of fear shown by the boy. I knew I was disturbed by it. The only reason for him to show that much fear was if this case wasn't over yet.

Sherriff Devins looked upset by the sudden emotional display by his grandson too, and it showed when he threw his jacket onto a chair and stalked into his office.

I grimaced at Beth moving into the office behind John and Dean, I refused to take a seat preferring instead to keep my back against the wall where no one could come up behind me. John took the seat I refused while Beth took the other and Dean remained standing by me, back against the wall and arms crossed in a defensive position.

Devins took a seat on the corner of his desk, facing the four of us. "Okay just so I'm clear," he said looking between John and I, "You two see, something, attack Bill's boat. Sending Bill, who is a very good swimmer by the way, into the drink, and you both never see him again?" He questioned.

John glanced back at me and we both nodded our heads in agreement. "Well, yeah," I said quietly.

"That about sums it up," John finished a heartbeat behind me. Devins gave us a look of mock surprise.

"And I'm supposed to believe this even though I've already sonar swept that entire lake, and what you're describing is impossible, and none of you are really wildlife service," he said knowingly.

Shit! I glanced at Dean, and he looked at me. God I wish we could see the Beth and John's faces although they probably mirrored our own. John and Beth glanced at each other too.

"Yeah, see I checked with your superiors, or who would have been your superiors. The department has never heard of any of you," he said softly to us.

"See now we can explain that," Dean said speaking up from beside me. I glanced at him incredulously, he shot me a look that clearly said feel free to chime in any time Cole.

"Enough," Devins said quietly. "Now the only reason any of you are breathing free air is because a neighbor of Bill's saw him steering out that boat just before you did." Jake Devins said giving us all dark looks. Beth shot me a glance over her shoulder.

"Now we have a couple of options here. I can arrest you all on principle for impersonating government officials and hold the four of you for material witnesses to the Carlton disappearance, or we can chock all of this up to a bad day. You get in your cars, you put this town in your rearview, and you don't ever darken my doorstep again," Devins said getting testy and using some hand gestures that would have gotten his finger broken if he'd dared to jab it in my face.

Dean and I shared a look, clearly on the same page. Door number two sounded great, but why in the hell was Lucas so freaked? We couldn't leave yet, not until we were certain of the fact that he was safe.

John thankfully had a bit more patience with people getting in his face than I did and he nodded considering our options. "Door number two sounds good," he said in a low voice.

Beth pursed her lips glancing back at me over her shoulder. The three of us were in agreement, but John seemed to think the case was done. This was going to turn into a mutiny.

"That's the one I'd pick," Devins said with an edge to his voice.

---

Lakefront Motel

We all headed back to the motel to pack up our things. "Dad, I really don't think this case is done," Dean said rounding on John the minute the door had closed behind us all.

"Dean," John said wearily. "I'm certain his case is closed. Cole and I saw Carlton get blown to kingdom come. The spirit got his revenge for whatever Carlton did to him," he said stating facts that we all knew.

I glanced at Beth as we packed our bags, then turned to try and help Dean state his case. "Yeah John that's all true but…" He turned on me, his mouth set in a stubborn line. Oh great, this was gonna be good. I wonder if this would double as our first couples argument…

"Look Sweeney got his revenge on Carlton. Carlton and everyone he cared about is dead. They all drowned. Case closed, goodbye, the end," John said.

"Plus we've been officially run out of town by the authorities if we stay we'll all be in a world of trouble," John said glancing at each of us in turn. He had us there, there was no denying it.

"Dad, so what happens if we take off and this thing isn't done?" Dean said his voice held an underlying current of worry.

"Lucas was really scared. Dad," Beth said trying to back Dean up, pleading with their father to just give them a chance to make sure the kid was going to be all right.

John sighed, glancing away and going over the possibilities. His gaze rounded on me. "What's you're take on things Nicole?" He asked me.

I had to go with my gut, I wasn't going to lie and put an innocent boy in danger because I didn't want to wound my….John's pride. And Lord knows the man has an ego. "I think that realistically, if this thing with Lucas is some kind of psychic ability that is tapped into the spirit, it would have stopped the minute Sweeney got his revenge." I said going for the offensive instead of defensive tactic. "It clearly hasn't, John that kid was freaking out back at the police station." I said worriedly.

"Okay, okay, but pack your bags because the minute we find out everything is fine we're leaving," John said in a gruff voice, he rounded and looked at his son. "Who the hell are you and what have you done with my son?" He said to Dean, who smiled in response.

"Yeah Dean that was practically a hallmark moment." I said jumping on board and blowing over the fact that we'd totally just mutinied our drill sergeant.

"Shut up," Dean said to me then he turned, grabbing his bag and stuffing clothes into it.

We were outside of the Devins residence thirty minutes later. Dean was ringing the doorbell.

"Okay, so are you sure about this Dean?" John asked trying one more time to talk him out of it.

Dean just glanced at his father not answering. The next instant the door was flung open and Lucas was in front of us looking terrified.

"Lucas?" Dean said reaching out to the terrified boy who evaded his hands and turned tail and ran. Dean and John pounded after him, Beth and I exchanged a frantic look then followed not even two paces behind.

Lucas lead us up a flight of stairs and started beating on a closed door. Dean pulled Lucas back into Beth's arms as he kicked the door open and John rushed in ahead of him. The scene before us was nothing short of a horror movie. The overflowing tub was seeping out brown dirty water, and Andrea was struggling to break the surface, essentially being drowned by an unseen force.

John dropped to his knees beside the tub and grabbed Andrea by the shoulders attempting to pull her up but it was obvious he was fighting Peter Sweeney's spirit. I went around to the side of the bathtub and pulled the plug, but even then the water wasn't going down.

John struggled a bit more with Andrea, before he was finally able to wrench her out of the spirit's grasp. He rolled with Andrea in his arms onto the floor pulling her away from the water.

I reached around behind me for a towel and tossed it over the top of her as John let Andrea go and she rolled onto her side still coughing up water. Beth released Lucas and he ran to his mother whimpering. I looked away from the embrace, giving them some privacy, and reached down to help John off the floor.

"Thank you." Andrea said simply turning to face all of us.

"We'll be downstairs," Beth said quietly to Andrea ushering us all out of the bathroom so the disturbed woman could get dressed. Andrea and Lucas met us downstairs in record time, and after she set Lucas at the living room coffee table she turned to face John, Beth, and I.

"Can you tell us what happened?" Beth asked softly. Andrea shook her head, tears gathering in her eyes.

"It doesn't make any sense," she said her voice cracking under the strain. "I feel like I'm going crazy," she covered her face with her hands.

My heart went out to her, this was the part I hated about being a hunter. Sometimes you had to take an innocent completely out of their comfort zone and into a whole other world where demons, monsters and homicidal spirits existed. And it sucked. Big time!

"Hey. You're gonna be okay, we're gonna help you but we need you to tell us what happened, everything." I said softly trying to keep her from freaking out.

She lowered her hands from her face. "I heard… or I thought I heard…. a voice saying 'come play with me'. I don't understand what's happening," she said dissolving into a small round of sobs.

Dean entered into the kitchen holding an old album. He flipped it open to a page and held it out to Andrea. "Do you recognize any of the kids in these pictures?" He asked her quickly.

She shot him a startled glance, "No, um except that's my dad, here and here," she said pointing to a few pictures. We all leaned forward to get a better look. Of course. Peter Sweeney and Bill Carlton were both pictured in these group pictures.

"That's the connection!" Beth said excitedly picking up on it the same time I did.

"Then Peter Sweeney's spirit wasn't tied to Bill Carlton, it was tied to the Sherriff," John said, "So why kill Carlton's kids?" He asked us at large.

"No!" I said impatiently. "It was to Carlton and to the Sherriff. They both had to have something to do with his disappearance," I explained hurriedly.

"Yeah, Chris Barr's drowning, it was a connection to them both!" Dean said backing me up.

"Wait, what about Chris?" Andrea asked "My… my dad what are you talking about?" She asked.

Dean's eyes caught the same movement mine did. Both of our heads turned simultaneously.

"Lucas?" Dean said. At his question, Andrea turned around to find her son staring out of the door. "Lucas what is it?" Dean asked, trying again. The boy didn't reply, he simply opened the door and ran outside, away from the house.

John, Beth, and I were already rising out of our chairs as Dean and Andrea flew to the door after Lucas.

We followed him out into the woods, Andrea kept calling for Lucas. He stopped a short way from the house looking down at a patch of grass; we all spread out surrounding him. Then he looked up and met Dean's gaze.

"You and Lucas should get back into the house and stay there," Dean said looking down at the kid. Then he and John exchanged a look. Time for the shovels.

Andrea reached out and grabbed Lucas, taking him back inside. Beth and I made our way to the Impala, grabbing the shovels that were inside the trunk.

"Is it wrong for me to be thankful that there's only two shovels?" I asked with a grin. I was totally kidding of course, I could pitch in and dig up a body with the best of them, however, I liked being one of the first to dig, I didn't like being down at the bottom when the coffin was opened. The smell. Ick.

"At least it's not night time and a graveyard," Beth said with a laugh. That was the combination Beth always complained about – seemed we were always digging up the bodies in the dark. I wound my arm around her as we traipsed back to the clearing where Dean and John were. Beth handed the shovel she was carrying to Dean with a grin, while I kept hold of the one I had, I was serious about not being the one down there when we found the body.

Dean and I started digging and we weren't digging long. I didn't know whether to be grateful or not, when I heard the sound of Dean's shovel hitting metal. He and I exchanged a look. That can't be good.

John and Beth came forward to help us get a little more dirt dug out from around whatever we had found. There was a bar sticking out from the ground, and I reached down to grab it, a bad feeling forming in the pit of my stomach.

John's hand covered mine. "Let us," he said quietly, a hand around my waist moving me back away from what we'd found. He and Dean yanked it up the rest of the way from the earth.

"Peter's bike," I said softly. Dammit. I felt a familiar itch forming between my shoulder blades, the one you get when someone has a gun trained on you. I heard the familiar click of a gun cocking, and I instantly froze with Beth beside me. We exchanged a look, as a similar tingle of anticipation shivered down both our spines.

"Who are you?" A voice said from behind us. John and Dean turned, dropping the bike.

"Put the gun down Jake," Dean said softly to Devins. He stretched his arms out in a gesture of surrender, glancing worriedly at Beth and me.

I kept my gaze on Devins, his gun hand wasn't steady like a man of confidence should be. He was shaken, rattled and gazed darkly at each of us in turn. "How the Hell did you know that was there?" He asked, his gaze flicking from Dean to John.

"What happened? You and Bill killed Peter? Drowned him in the lake and then buried his bike?" John asked darkly, his voice pitched low. He was drawing the attention away from us. Beth and I glanced at each other, neither of us was close enough to try to disarm him.

"You can't bury the truth Jake," John said. "Nothing stays buried." He snapped at the Sherriff.

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about," Devins said denying everything. Of course he would deny everything.

"You and Bill killed Peter Sweeney thirty five years ago. That's what the hell I'm talking about. And now you have one seriously pissed off spirit," John said, his voice growing harder and showing his agitation at being unable to act without putting us all in danger.

"Dad!" Andrea called out, running up to us. Jake's gaze wavered, flicking to her. I took a step forward, as he swung back around to face me, the barrel of his Glock pointed at my heart. I froze lifting my hands in an unarmed gesture.

"It's gonna take Andrea," Dean said speaking up, drawing the attention away from Beth and I. We were after all in the best position to get Devins unarmed, although I'd rather take him on myself. Last thing Beth needed was to injure herself again. "Lucas, and everyone you love. It's gonna drown them and it's gonna drag their bodies God knows where, so that you can feel the same pain Peter's mom felt. And then after that. It's gonna take you. And it's not gonna stop until it does," Dean said.

"Oh really? And how do you know that?" Devins asked Dean quietly.

"Because that is exactly what it did to Bill Carlton," Dean responded in a matter of fact tone.

"Listen to yourselves all of you are insane," Devins said in disbelief.

"I don't really give a rat's ass what you think of us, but if we're gonna bring down this spirit, we need to find the remains, salt them and burn them into dust," Dean said quietly.

"Please tell me you buried Peter somewhere? That you didn't just let his body go into the lake?" John demanded, speaking up again.

"Dad is any of this true?" Andrea asked her father.

"No, don't listen to them. They are liars and they're dangerous," Devins responded, not taking his gaze from any of us this time.

"Something tried to drown me. Chris died in that lake. Dad look at me!" She said, her voice raising in fear. Jake dropped his gaze to the ground before raising it to meet his daughter's eyes.

"Please tell me you didn't kill anyone," she said beseechingly to him. He dropped his gaze again, unable to meet Andrea's eyes. "Oh my God!" Jake lowered his gun from us. I sent up a silent prayer to whomever was listening. Thank you!

"Billy and I we were at the lake. Peter was the smallest and we always bullied him. This time it got rough." He paused to collect himself and barely met Andrea's gaze. "We were holding his head under water. We didn't mean to. But we held him under too long and he drowned."

He turned his gaze back to us. "We let the body go. And it sank," he said while John and Dean exchanged a frustrated look. "Andrea, we were kids, it was a mistake. But to say that I had anything to do with these drownings, with Chris. Because of some ghost. It's just not rational." Jake said turning back to his daughter.

"All right listen to me all of you," John said assertively. "We have to get you as far from this lake as we can. Right now." He said in a tone that brooked no argument.

Andrea turned her gaze away from him and I found myself following her line of vision. Oh no Lucas! The boy was leaning over the pier trying to reach something in the water.

"Lucas!" Devins yelled. All of us turned toward the lake, sprinting for the dock.

I heard Dean and Andrea yelling for the boy. We broke from the tree line still flat out running for the pier. Devins had stopped, and I swerved around him gaining the dock the same time Andrea and Beth did. John and Dean were already in the water.

I stopped at the edge of the pier, I would be more use to them here, in case God forbid something happened to the boy.

I reached out a hand and grabbed Andrea's arm, forcing her to stay with Beth and I on the docks when she looked like she might jump in after them. "No, Andrea you need to stay on this dock." I said sharply to her.

"But Lucas, no that's my son," she screamed at me, attempting to wrench her arm away from me, Beth wrapped her arm around Andrea from the other side. Preventing her from breaking my grip and diving into the lake after Lucas.

"They'll get him, we just need to stay on the dock," Beth said to her.

Dean had surfaced again, as had John. "Dad, anything?" Dean yelled to him, looking wildly around. John shook his head negatively. Oh God. They both dove under again looking for Lucas.

The surface broke again and Dean's head popped up above the water. "Anything?" Beth yelled, and he shook his head. Suddenly he flailed and was jerked under the water.

"Dean!" Beth screamed from beside me, she stepped toward the edge, pulling off her jacket and I grabbed her.

"What the hell are you doing?" I asked her sharply and she looked at me in a panic. "Beth you can't go in there!"

"Like Hell I can't! It's Dean!" She said, wrenching her arm free of my grip.

"I'll go," I said, forcing my jacket off, precious minutes were passing. "You're still injured you definitely aren't going in there." I glared at her and dove into the lake, the cold water surrounding me in an instant as I started swimming to where Dean had been pulled under.

John surfaced at that moment with the boy in his arms. He looked at me in the water and frowned. "What are you doing?!" He yelled at me.

"Dean! He's been pulled under, Sweeney has him!" I called out to him. His eyes swung around, taking in our predicament. He shoved the boy toward me and into my arms.

"Where?!" He yelled to Beth. She gave him directions to where she'd last seen Dean go under. "Get out of the water and stay there! That's an order!" He yelled, then he dove again.

I swam back to the desk, pulling Lucas with me, keeping his head above the water. Beth and Andrea leaned down to haul him onto the dock. He was already coughing and spitting up water. I pulled myself out of the water, wet and cold, and checked Lucas' vitals, he was cold, and in shock, but breathing.

My attention was forced from the scene in front of me, where John was searching for Dean, to where the Sherriff had waded out into the lake calling for Peter.

I didn't even bother calling out for him or trying to stop him, maybe if Sweeney took Devins we'd get Dean back. Beth and I shared the same thought in a look. We weren't gonna stop him, not if it meant getting Dean back.

The Sherriff was pulled under water. Beth and I gripped each other, in a kind of terrifying all-encompassing fear that we were about to lose one of our family forever. Our gaze turned back to where Dean had been pulled under.

Seconds ticked by where we had nothing but the comfort of each other, the pounding of our hearts beating loud in our own ears, the blood thundering through our veins and adrenaline making us itch for action. But there was nothing we could do. We'd been given an order and we had to obey.

I gasped as John surfaced, he had hold of Dean in front of him, keeping his face out of the water. Beth cried out beside me, at least we had Dean again. As John got nearer I reached over the side of the dock seizing a handful of Dean's clothes and wrenching at him, pulling him up onto the dock. Beth leaned down to help me and with a massive effort and a huge adrenaline rush the three of us got Dean onto the dock.

Beth was leaning over him, "Dean! Dean don't you leave me, open your eyes! Don't you leave me!" I scrambled to check Dean's pulse. There wasn't one.

"No. Oh God no." I fought back the sob welling up in my throat. The tears were another matter, I didn't even bother fighting them. Beth was freaking out, reaching for her phone and calling 911. She was crying, sobbing so bad her whole body was shaking.

"Beth. Dammit Beth listen to me!" I yelled at her. She jumped looking at me shocked. "We can get him back but I need you to hold it together!" I snarled. The anger and fury was taking over, this was what I absolutely hated about being a hunter we never had any freaking clue when our last moments would be as a family.

Beth pulled herself together as she talked to the operator on the phone, giving them our location, though tears still streamed freely down her cheeks. I grabbed the phone out of Beth's hands and gave it to Andrea. "Tell them I have a 23 year old male, approximately 160 to 200 pounds. Not breathing and no pulse. CPR has been started!"

"Now you," I said swinging back to Beth, "breathe for him! Got it?" Beth nodded at me tears streaming down her face as she bent down to hover over Dean's face.

I'll never forget this feeling. The feeling of holding life or death in your hands. At times when saving people's lives is nothing more than a job, it can be a total thrill seeking adrenaline rush. Other times when it's the life of a loved one it can be the most terrifying feeling in the world. I was scared to death, I couldn't show it though. Dean needed me, and I knew without a doubt that if I showed even an ounce of fear or defeat Beth would crumble into a million pieces.

However neither of those two things are what really and truly solidified my resolve that I was not losing my brother, what really cemented that belief was the gaze of the man across from me. John looked lost and alone. I knew in that instant he truly would never be able to survive without his children.

I ignored the sickening feeling of Dean's ribs cracking under the pressure I was exerting on his heart. I ignored the tears and sobs coming from Beth between life-saving oxygenated breaths for Dean. I focused on my mission, keeping my brother alive.

At some point the paramedics had arrived. It didn't matter. I could vaguely feel the vibrations of the wheels of the gurney they were rolling down the dock toward us. "I've got a twenty three year old male approximately two hundred pounds, drowning victim, was under approximately five minutes. We've been doing CPR, so far no response." I panted out between breaths of air for myself and compressions.

"And you are?" One of the EMT's asked me as they cut away Deans shirt and hooked up some EKG leads and defibrillator patches to Dean's chest.

"Nicole Singer, RN at Upper Connecticut Valley Hospital in the ER," the other EMT was trying to pull me away from Dean. "Back off man I'm not ready for a break yet he's my goddamn brother!" I snarled.

They had lowered the stretcher and we were transferring Dean onto it. He gasped for air suddenly, spitting up water.

"Dean!" I heard Beth cry. The EMT closest to me and I reacted, rolling Dean onto his side on the stretcher so he could get some of the water out of his lungs.

Within minutes the paramedics had Dean hooked up to oxygen, and a portable telemetry monitor on. One was attempting to start an IV and he blew the vein. The other EMT blew another. Dean appeared to be fading in and out of consciousness. I wasn't worried, his monitors would alert us to any serious change in his condition.

I reached around for a new IV start kit pulling on some gloves and ripping off the index finger tip so I could palpate for a vein. I had one in the wrist. I popped in the IV, withdrew the tourniquet and applied a clear op site over it before either paramedic knew what was happening.

I decided to take a step back while they continued stabilizing Dean for the trip to the hospital. Now that the adrenaline rush was over and Dean was technically alive again, I was starting to feel absolutely exhausted.

"All right we're ready to move him to the hospital," one of the paramedics said. John and Beth were on either side of the stretcher moving with it toward the ambulance.

"One of you can ride with him." The EMT said to us. John and I looked up, we were both soaking wet.

"Beth, go with him." John said, "we'll be along once we're changed."

The minute the ambulance doors had closed on Dean and Beth, I sagged against John in relief. I was exhausted.

---

I made my way out of the hospital into the ambulance bay. I was tired and exhausted. I sighed, leaning against the red brick of the hospital building. The automatic doors opened again behind me to reveal John coming for me.

"So the doctor's say Dean is going to be okay. They want to keep him overnight for observation. Something about how most drowning victims if they are going to have issues it's in the first eight hours." He said, coming to lean in beside me, offering me comfort.

I simply nodded my head. Since Dean had been brought to the hospital I had once again been in one of my down and depressed moods. I didn't know what was up with that. Maybe I was coming down with something.

John moved in front of me and I met his gaze unblinkingly. I loved this man. There was no denying it. "I love you, John Winchester," I said softly, looking up into his gaze and meaning every one of those words.

His brow creased in confusion. "I love you," he said slowly after a moment of silence.

I wrapped my arms around his waist leaning into him fully, pressing myself against him. I loved him so much it hurt. It hurt my heart to think about what I was about to do.

John moved his hands to my shoulders gently forcing me back. "Baby what's wrong?" He asked concerned.

I struggled to blink back the tears in my eyes. "I have to go." I swallowed trying to get past the lump in my throat.

"Go?" He said his brow furrowing further. "Go where baby?" He looked so confused. So unprepared. I however had known this was coming ever since we'd arrived in Wisconsin. And instead of preparing him for it, and getting him and myself ready for the inevitable. I'd blissfully and ignorantly allowed myself to go on thinking things could remain the way they were.

"I have to go back to my life, John. I worked hard to achieve some semblance of normal. I can't do this on a daily basis, it scares me too much. Not knowing if we are coming out alive or dead one minute to the next. I don't have the same drive, I don't have the vendetta, Mom is gone and nothing is bringing her back. I have to live my life for her, for what she would have wanted. For what Dad wants." I said trying to keep my voice on an even keel. I felt like my heart was breaking. I loved John. I loved my father. I loved hunting. I also loved getting a break from the supernatural world, from the killing and the fear. I loved being a normal 23 year old girl. Why the hell did this all have to be so hard?

John's face had shone through with love only minutes before, now it was completely unreadable; like a mask. I cringed inwardly, what had I just done? He looked over my shoulder, and let out a sigh. When he looked back at me there was a resignation I hadn't seen in his eyes in a long time.

"Whatever you want baby girl, I would never ask you to go against what you need," he said quietly, reaching out a hand to bring it softly along my cheek.

I stared at him. Did he just tell me goodbye? Tears pricked in my eyes and I felt a disappointment settle there.

"I'll take you back to Olivia's to get your car, Dean will be here overnight anyway," he said, and with no further ado he pushed past me, walking quickly toward his truck, leaving me wondering about what was really going on in his head.

---

The drive to Olivia's was made in complete silence. We didn't even speak when we stopped for gas or food. I wasn't sure what I'd done, I only knew that one minute I'd been totally and powerlessly in love with John, and the next I had blown it all to hell because of my own personal landmine.

Hours had passed, hell it may have even been days. I woke with a start when John reached out to wake me.

"We're here. Your normal life is waiting," he said quietly, his voice sounding scratchy and faint from not speaking for hours on end.

I glanced out of the window, not ready to leave yet. I had to know something. Besides it was pouring down rain outside. We sat there in silence it seemed simply waiting for the other to make a move.

"I love you," I said softly unable to bring myself to look at him, I gazed at my hands. "I think I've loved you since before I even knew what love was. I…. You saved my life John. I love you and you saved my life. I would be dead without you." I said, tears falling now, silent and freely, but there. I grabbed my bag and wrenched open the door stepping out into the pouring rain.

At least now no one would be able to tell I'd been crying, not that anyone cared. I walked around the front of the truck to my car, throwing my bag in on the passenger's seat.

I felt a hand grip my arm tightly, swinging me around like I was nothing more than a rag doll. I found myself pressed up against my car by John's body. He was looking at me with a desperate ache in his eyes.

"I love you dammit! I've loved you for so long I don't remember not feeling this way. I stayed away from you and Bobby fighting my feelings, thinking nothing good could possibly come from them. I was a monster, as sick and twisted as those we hunt. I'm so tired of fighting how I feel about you. There is no getting past how I've felt about you for years. I have spent decades alone and lost and chasing a love I believed was my only shot. You're my redemption, you're my salvation. You're mine and I will not give you up!" He said to me.

The rain fell down upon us, and once more we were drenched through to our skin. It was as if the rain was there for us alone, to wash away all the heartache and pain from the past bringing in a cleansing that was so desperately needed.

"This isn't over," John said to me, "it will never be over for me." Tears welled in my eyes at this statement.

It's all I'd been looking for this past month, for him to fight for us, to show me that we were important to him, not just another stroll in the park, another notch in the bedpost. It was enough. I knew beyond a doubt after this declaration that ours was a love that was born out of time, it defied all meaning and understanding, and here he was acknowledging that he had loved me all along, just as I had him.

I smiled at him softly, encouragingly. All I could think to say was a quote from my favorite book Leaves of Grass.

"Among the men and women the multitude, I perceive one picking me out by secret
and divine signs…" John shook his head in amusement at me.

"Shut up and kiss me would you?" He said with a smile and twinkle in his eye. He lowered his head to mine claiming my lips possessively. Maybe we didn't know what was going to be coming our way in the future, maybe we would walk separate paths but now I knew that regardless of where our own paths took us, we would never been fully alone, we would carry each other in our hearts. He was mine as much as I was his. I was home. And I was safe. So long as I had him, I always would be.

The End.

---

Author's Notes:

All right guys this is the end of How to Save a Life. I had planned on continuing this for some time however it just no longer fits my storyline that I need to progress on to. So I do still have more story to write, and the next story picks up in Season One. This story was almost four years before S1 so I have told the beginning. I am going to tell the middle and the end in another few stories. I hope you guys liked it! Please Read and Review, I love to read your thoughts. I may revisit the years in between depends on whether or not I can see any possible story lines. If you guys have any ideas on that please feel free to share!

Thank you BellaDonna78 I loved loved LOVED working on this with you! I am really excited to do S1 and tie in some more stories. If anyone is confused about Beth and Dean check out Highway to Hell, All Hell Breaks Loose, and Hell to Pay!

I have a few questions for my readers: 1. What do you guys see John and Cole's relationship being like almost five years down the road? Do they fight a lot? Do you see them being sweet and loving? Can you see Cole not putting up with any of John's crap? And vice versa. Also in this story Cole's attitude seemed all over the place one minute hot the next minute cold. Do you guys like seeing that aspect or would you like to see her more mature and less frazzled? ( I know I for one would love to see her more mature and less freaky. And since we are now jumping four years into the future I think that is a reasonable expectation.)