A new Harry:Life is a game

by Flyingninjafish

Harry and I both happen to die at the same time and our Death consultant sends me with all my knowledge in Harry's place to finish his destiny. And gives me Gamer powers just because. Don't look at me like that I was just as confused as you are as to why. I think she was just bored or somethin'. Self insert with gamer powers. No OP, no rape, little slash(if any), harem, lemons.

2. Tutorials suck but are needed

AN: New chapter folks, took about 3 days to write. Don't expect another quick update,I'm being dragged away from my keyboard to help my mother with redecorating her business so I won't be able to write as much for at least the next few days when this comes out. In this chapter I focus more on the gamer portion. If there are any errors feel free to point them out in a review I will try and fix them when I can. For now, enjoy the 2nd chapter of A new Harry:Life is a Game.

I awoke in near darkness, so it was hard to actually tell that I was awake and not still unconscious. My attention was immediately drawn to a floating dark blue, mildly luminous screen that hovered in front of me.

Congratulations for starting Harry Potter the video game. Press Ok to start the tutorial!

True enough there at the bottom was a small outline of a rectangle with the word "Ok!" written in it with fancy penmanship. The kind you see on those really awesome signatures you try to copy and end up failing at miserably and you end up just writing your name slightly tilted. Seeing no reason not to follow the instructions I of course pressed my palm against it. The texture was strange, almost like jelly but harder; my hand sunk in slightly but there was definitely a decent amount of force needed to push. I smiled at the fact that I wouldn't be forced to use a crappy touchscreen feature and would actually be using a decent touchscreen feature. One that joined the ease of regular touchscreen and the satisfaction of buttons. Ah bliss. The writing on the screen seemed to fade before new text replaced it.

This basic tutorial program will show you the base aspects of the game. We will start by opening your status menu. Simply say or think "Status" to do so.

It was simple and easy, but still when I whispered out "Status", the higher pitched voice somewhat disconcerting, and a new screen popped up, I gave a little squee in excitement. The crazy Death Consultant hadn't been lying. My life was actually a game now. It wasn't something she had just lazily tacked on at the end as a way of fucking with me. My eagerness was unfortunately put on hold as another screen popped up over the status screen blocking it from view and allowing me to actually see it.

This is your status screen. It shows basic information about your character as in all games. This includes health, mana, any status effects you are under as well as your base stats. How to access advanced information will be covered in the next part of the tutorial. For now familiarize yourself with the current screen available.

The text faded once more before the box shrunk and flew to the edge of my vision, like one of those black spots that you try to focus on that always moves away when it's in the center of your vision. The screen it self was a beige color not too dissimilar of parchment. And given that this "game" is based on Harry Potter where that's still a thing, this is probably what they were going for on that one. The writing here was just as curvy and loopy as the text in the instructions, so it ended up being a little hard to read but after a few seconds to suss it out I finally learned just what the hell my status screen was showing me.

Name: Harry James Potter

Level 1 (0/200)

Age: 9

Race: Human (wizard)

Health : 50

Mana : 200

Stamina: 100

£0/0g, 0s, 0kn

Strength (str): 3 (-2) - This affects how much weight you can lift as well as the damage of your melee attacks.

Vitality (vit): 3 (-2) - This affects you health and health regeneration as well as your stamina

Dexterity (dex): 5 (-3) - This affects your aim, as well as your speed and how well you can dodge attacks

Intelligence (int): 10 - Your intelligence will improve the size of your mana pool as well as how generally smart your are. Nothing else to it.

Wisdom (wis): 10 - Your wisdom will improve the rate at which your mana regenerates as well as how good you are at using what you know.

Charisma (chr): 8 - How charismatic you are will affect how well you can influence those around you through speech, as well as improving the prices of goods, both for buying and selling

Luck (lck): 5 - Sometimes your life relies on the luck of a die. Luck affects the chances of getting a critical hit as well as the loot that enemies drop when defeated.

Malnourished: Drastically reduces str and vit. To cure eat lots of varied foods.

Damaged eyes: Reduces Dexterity immensely. Can be negated through eye-wear of the right prescription. Incorrect prescription will either further reduce dex or not fully negate this effect.

"Town Hooligan":Due to lies spread by the Dursleys, all except certain characters in the area "Little Whinging" will have a negative reputation with you. This effect can be negated through positive actions to either a person or a community, however this will not work on all characters.

Adorable: For once your small frame and wild hair comes in handy as certain characters will find you so cute they cannot help but like you. Enjoy all the inevitable embarrassing boob hugs your bound to get because of it!

Living Horcrux: 2 souls for the price of one! Because of "Voldemort"'s butchering and gluing of his soul into your scar, you have permanently gained the "Parseltongue" skill. However this also leaves you 2x as vulnerable to possession by "Voldemort".

Foreknowledge: Your previous life has given you access to certain skills and abilities. However some of these may be locked until a later date.

Going over my stats I was left very disappointed by the health stat though based on the fact that I was only level 1 it was likely that way simply because of my lower level. The age surprised me greatly as I had assumed that Harry had been about 6 or 7 based on his size when I first met him. I didn't know much about children but even I knew that Harry was far too small to be healthy for his age, so his low amount of health obviously reflected this. His - my, I suppose I should get used to that - my mana however was substantially larger. Most people assumed that Harry was powerful and the amount of pure mana he had for such a low level seemed to agree with the fact. I had no money to my name whether normal or magical, at least not on my person so those being 0 was not surprising. My stats were all atrocious though, at least on the physical side of things. Thank you Dursleys.

However my mental based stats were a lot higher, most likely from me having the brain on someone almost 3 times Harry's age. What worried me were the large amount of debuffs. If I was reading them right then no matter how I raised my physical stats, the debuffs would lower them to the point of near uselessness. So getting rid of them would be a priority.

The "Town Hooligan" debuff was just stupid in my opinion. How could everyone believe that a 9 year old boy who looked closer to a 6 year old could be a criminal? At least it said some people weren't affected. Note to self, find and befriend these people, do not want to go crazy from lack of decent interaction with fellow humans. I blushed heavily at the description of the "Adorable" buff. Watching anime and reading fanfiction had taught me that cute kids always somehow end up being squeezed into the breasts of beautiful woman. My adult perverted side was drooling at the thought that I too may get the chesticle caress, while simultaneously cursing the fact that I was only 9, and that I had not yet entered puberty, so I would be unable to truly enjoy such and embrace.

The debuff to the Living Horcrux was frightening as I had no desire to lose myself to some hairless, no nose, Michael Jackson impersonator with a snake fetish. Not without a fight first. But the way it was written sounded like I could also protect myself from possession as well. Not a priority skill to learn now but perhaps something to look into later.

Having understood my stats and current buff/debuffs, I tapped the tiny blue screen, causing it to expand and new writing to fade in once more.

Would you like to continue? Yes or No

I hit Yes and the words dissolved once more. My status screen was replaced by a new screen, though I could see a tab called "Status" at the top of the screen as well as another that said "Advance Status". Again my sight was blocked by the now familiar blue instruction screen.

This is the Advanced Status screen. This contains all the extra information about yourself that you may need. This includes your Reputation with certain characters or communities as well as a map of your surrounding area. Reputation is measured between -100 and 100. Higher positive reputations will allow you to get away with certain acts in someone's presence, convince to partake in certain acts, as well as better the buying and selling prices if they sell items.

With the map there are 2 options: local, which shows your surrounding area, and world which shows a great deal more, but in less detail. Tap a location to set a way-point and use the slider on the left to zoom in or out. To open, simply open your status screen and tap the tab called "Advanced Status", tap the "Status" tab to return. Again familiarize yourself with this screen before continuing.

The "Advanced Status" screen seemed to be split into two sections. One half on the right for a map, and one half on the left for the Reputations. As to be expected there was a lot of people Harry - I, again need to get used to calling myself Harry, - I had a low reputation with. There were the Dursleys at -100, no surprise there. Piers Polkiss was another name in the red at -90, pretty sure he was that kid who bullied Harry with Dudley. After that there was a long list of names for the neighbors and Harry's schoolmates, all either slightly bad or in some cases, very bad, averaging at -40 or so.

Fortunately there were a handful of people who were at least "neutral" when it came to Harry. Arabella Figg, Dumbledore's spy or caretaker for me or whatever she was supposed to be, of course had a positive view of Harry at 30, and a woman called Miss Rosanna who had a Reputation of 35. Harry's file said she was one of his teachers so it made sense for her to have a decent score. She probably interacted with him more than most people would dare to so she saw him more as a normal boy than a criminal like so many others. A few other unimportant names all hovering between 0 and 10 from other random locals were all that was left of the Surrey bunch.

But then it came to the big ones. My Reputations on the wizarding side of things. Dumbledore was one of the first at a respectful 20. To be honest I was never a fan of Dumbledore. Call me one of those crazy conspiracy theorists but I always thought he was planning Harry's downfall all along. All that greater good nonsense and the creepy eye glint may have had something to do with it. I resolved to keep a close eye on Dumbledore. Who knows maybe he won't be an idiot in this timeline? Famous last words those are right there.

Minerva Mcgonagall had a much higher reputation of 40, the highest out of anyone on the list. Which was weird because she'd only known Harry - me, dammit this is still weird - me since I was a baby and despite being cute, they aren't that great at conversations. Maybe I was just a really, really cute baby? Hagrid followed suit on the high reputations at 37, the first non-multiple of 5 in the entire list. Jeez what did I do to get that? Maybe I vomited on him when he was flying me here on that motorbike. That's gotta be worth a few negative points. Sirius and Remus both shared a Reputation of 34, not so bad there.

Next up was the bad guys, starting with ,of course, Voldemort who was right up with the Dursleys with a reputation of -100. Hey maybe I should introduce them sometime and they can bond over how much they hate me and want me dead. Maybe they can swap ideas on how best to torture me. Peter Pettigrew, the cowardly pedophilic rat (he sleeps in a room full of teenagers and even curls up next to Ron, if he's not a pedophile then I'm married to a hippogryph) had a score of -70, not as low as his Master's but still pretty bad, not that I cared much. Strangely enough these were the only other reputations I had. I kind of expected, well, a lot more. Figured being the "boy-who-lived-to-have-a-hyphenated-name" would give me more than just the locals and the few magicals I had met as a baby.

Wait. All the people in my Reputations I had met at some time. Either when I was a baby or when I was younger. So that means that I only get a Reputation with someone when I meet them. Or at least I can see their Reputation once I meet them. That seemed fair. How can I tell what people think of me if I've never met them?

Finishing with the Reputation side of the screen, I switched my attention to the map portion. The map side had two tabs at the far right edge one saying "local" and another saying "world", with a slider close to the center of the screen, just to the right of where the Reputation and map screens separated.. Currently the "local" tab was highlighted and the map was showing what was presumably the interior of number 4 Privet Drive. There in the center was a cartoonish looking version of my face, complete with glasses and tiny scar. Deciding to experiment, I pushed a finger against a room that I guessed was the kitchen, and sure enough a little lightning bolt way-point, along with a dotted line that showed how to get there. Given that I was right next to it, it amounted to a small, backwards, dotted "L".

Satisfied with my knowledge of the new screen, I repeated the steps to move onto the next part of the tutorial. Like before, the "Advanced Status" screen faded away to be replaced with a new screen, that once more was blocked by a text box. It was getting somewhat annoying how I was forced to wait to see the actual screen until after I had read the info on it. Nevertheless, I read the content that this new box provided me.

This is your inventory. You can use it to store all sorts of items, be they weapons, armor, healing items, quest items etc. There are multiple tabs that you may name at your convenience. To place something in your inventory, simply touch the item in question and say or think "Send to inventory". To move things around your inventory simply drag and drop. To pull something from your inventory, select the item and say "Remove from inventory". This inventory screen also allows you to quickly switch equipped items by dragging them onto the representation of yourself. Feel free to meddle around with it for a while before continuing.

This was one of the aspects from the whole "Video-game reality" that I was looking forward to most. It may be a weird thing to focus on but I have always wanted to have a video game inventory. Why? Because it is so convenient! No more carrying everything in bags, or dragging something heavy really long distances. Just "Pop" into the inventory you go. I t would make life so much easier. And now I had one! All to myself! Mwa ha ha ha haaa! Hmm. My evil laugh may take some work. Especially since now even my thoughts sounded childish, as well as my voice. I shook my head clear of the thought. Inventory now, evil laugh later.

The screen was, like the others, a dark blue, though I could make out faint white lines that seemed to make up boxes, to separate the different items perhaps? At the top were the tabs to open the other screens but just below them were several other tabs, all without text. The instructions hadn't said how to rename them though. Taking a chance, I pressed lightly on one of the tabs, not as hard as I had with the other buttons, sort of the equivalent of a right click on computers instead of the regular left. Sure enough a keyboard, or at least a box with a load of letters in buttons, popped up. Having expected something similar to happen I was nonplussed by it. I quickly named a few of the tabs, one for weapons, one for armor, etc. I basically took the suggestions that the earlier text box gave me and left a few tabs clear for later. Never know when I might find something new I need a whole new set of tabs for.

To the right of the screen, similar to how the Reputation and Map had worked on the previous one, there was a little cartoon version of myself. Over which were several white boxes, one on my head with another just below for my face, one on each arms, one for my legs, one for my feet, and a last one for my chest. The face slot was filled with a pair of large, round, taped up glasses. The chest was home to an over-sized, ratty looking t-shirt which housed numerous holes, and the leg slot was filled with a pair of trousers in a similar condition. The rest were empty as I had no other coverings on those areas.

Because there was a lot less to go through, I quickly finished with the inventory section and swiftly moved on. Once more the text box popped up with a new batch of writing for me to read. Hopefully it wouldn't be another one of the "read this and mess around with a screen" tutorials.

Now that you have gotten used to accessing basic features of the game we will now proceed with your very first quest!

Yes! Finally something interesting. Oooh I couldn't wait. I wonder what it would be. Maybe I'll get to beat the crap out of something. Or maybe I'll learn how to cast a spell, or, or -

A sudden, bright light being shined directly at my face, along with a sharp series of knocks at the door to my left brought me out of my delusions, followed by a screeching voice that said "Up, up you ungrateful brat. It's almost time for breakfast, and you'd better not burn anything like last time or so help me God." the voice seemed to trail of as it left it's threat hanging. Aunt Petunia. In the books she had come off as highly unpleasant, but going by that voice alone she was downright detestable. Wait, hadn't she said something about breakfast. Suddenly, a high pitched ping rang in my ears as a new, dark red box appeared in the center of my screen. While the color was different, the text was the same loopy writing as always.

Tutorial quest added: Making breakfast

An everyday occurrence in the Dursley household is Harry cooking the daily breakfast. Now it's your turn. Cook a decent breakfast for the Dursleys to complete the quest.

0/10 pieces of bacon cooked

0/7 pancakes cooked

0/5 eggs cooked

0/7 toast cooked

0/2 coffee cooked

0/1 orange juice served

0/5 hash browns cooked

0/8 sausages cooked

Reward: 50xp, improved reputation with the Dursleys, 1 piece of toast, 1 sausage, 1 piece of bacon, £0.50

Failure: reduced reputation with the Dursleys, no food for a day

At the sight of just what I had to do, my jaw dropped. That was a very big list. A huge list. A ginormous list. And all for 3 people. Well I say 3 people, more 2 whales and a horse woman. The sheer scope what I thought would be a simple task left me gaping. Though the rewards were tempting, the punishment was unpleasant and would not help towards beating the malnourished debuff, and it was the first quest of the "game". I would not fall to such a simple, albeit daunting challenge. I quickly switched out of the ratty clothes I was currently wearing and into a new pair of equally ratty clothes that were slightly more fresh, as well as slipping on a pair of beat up shoes that were a little on the tight side. Crawling my way out of the cupboard that was Harry's, and now my, bedroom I made my way towards the kitchen. The new, smaller body was a hassle to get used to and I tripped over more than once on the short walk to the Kitchen.

As I walked into the kitchen I was "greeted" by Aunt Petunia's demeaning glare and a sharp comment of "Get to work!". As I hurried across the room gathering the ingredients I needed, I took a moment to observe my new "Aunt" (as if she deserves the title). If anything, the books had been rather underwhelming with their description of her. She was tall and bony, not as thin as Harry but rather close enough to be unsettling, almost as if she starved herself in pursuit of the perfect body of a housewife. Or perhaps Vernon just preferred stick insects over traditional women. Her neck was easily twice as tall as any other persons I had seen, which while humorous in writing, is actually quite disgusting in person.

Especially with how wrinkled it was. It looked less like a neck and more like a grandmother's vagina. And no I do not actually know what they look like, I am just assuming. You do not know how many times someone has asked me why I know what they look like. Some idiots just can't take a joke. Back on topic. The face was the worst part. While not as wrinkly as her neck, there was so much makeup layered onto it she looked like a horse who had sex with a clown, and then decided to don a dress and start calling everyone else freaks. So yeah, not pleasant to look at.

After my observation of Petunia (I decided then and there I would refuse to acknowledge her as Aunt unless it was necessary to keep up my disguise) I heard another high pitched ping, similar to the ping I heard when I received my first quest, and a small green box appeared.

Congratulations on discovering your first ability. These are actions you can perform such as spells. This first ability is a simple Observe, where you can learn information about a target, be they a person, creature, or even items. Higher levels will reveal more about the target. To use an ability, simply say or think the name of the ability. However some have additional criteria to using them, though these may be bypassed with high enough levels in those skills.

Finally a skill! I was ecstatic. I know it wasn't particularly that much of an impressive skill but it was a skill nonetheless. Something that showed I was making some progress. "What are you doing boy!" a loud voice screeched into my ear "you're supposed to be cooking breakfast not staring off into space like that!" Petunia's rather maddening yelling jarred me back to my task. I got out a number of plates before sliding several pieces of bread into the toaster, placing a pan with bacon inside onto the gas cooker before turning to a medium flame.

Then I set the microwave to heat up and put the required hash browns on a baking sheet. I then set up a pan for the eggs and another for the sausages, remembering to add in the oil beforehand, god knows how many times I've made that mistake in the past. As the eggs and sausages were cooking, I retrieved the toast from the toaster before adding in the second set of bread. As I picked up the toast however a small ping and a red box showed up in the center of the screen for a few seconds saying:

4/7 toast cooked

8xp gained

So cooking was something that gave me experience? A satisfied grin came to my face. While the, xp wasn't much, only amounting to 2xp per piece of toast cooked, it was still a welcome addition. Not to mention if this quest was a daily occurrence than the xp would certainly start to wrack up. As I continued my cooking of the feast the Dursleys called breakfast, I found that bacon and sausages were worth 2xp each, pancakes 4xp, the drinks all worth 1xp, and the hash browns and eggs worth 3xp each, all netting to a decent 111xp in total. Just over half of what I needed to level up.

I had just finished serving the food onto the plates when the sound of creaking stairs reached my ears, and I gave a mental groan at who was coming. It was either Vernon or Dudley. Don't know who I hate more and which one I would prefer to come down first. Fortunately my inner questioning of which was the bigger asshole (metaphorically speaking 'cause they were both pretty damn big), was broken when in walked Dudley. Like with Petunia, Dudley was much more unattractive than he was described in the books. Which was saying something, considering he was described as a "pig in a wig". J K Rowling could not have been more right with those words, despite them being somewhat underwhelming compared to the actual image that Dudley posed.

He was wearing, of all the God forsaken clothing he had to choose from, a t-shirt and shorts, allowing me an unfortunate look at all the blubbering fat that he consisted of. It was somewhat hypnotizing in a nauseating way how it seemed to jiggle and roll with every movement he made. He appeared to possess no visible neck, instead his head seemed to float on a pile of even more fat. Although considering the rest of him he could have just consisted of a glob of fat and a fat filled head. And fat seemed to be the only thing in his head if the perpetual "huh?" expression on his face told me anything. It was as if he was constantly trying to remember something, or trying to answer a really tough riddle. A ridiculously styled patch of blonde hair nestled above his head, which completed the "pig in a wig" image, as the hair seemed too blonde to be real. Not Malfoy bleached blonde, but still brighter than his mother's, enough to look fake.

As Walrus Jr made his approach to the table, Walrus Sr seemed to be making his way down the stairs, as evidenced by an even louder creaking sound as the stairs almost broke underneath the gargantuan weight of the "man" who was descending upon them. Vernon arrived at the table as Dudley took his seat and began shoveling some food onto his plate. He was the only person who any kind of media managed to get right. He looked almost exactly as he did in the movie. Wide, with a mixture of a lot of fat and some small amount of muscle. His mustache covered his upper lip, as wild and untamed as my hair, only a good deal less attractive. His facial features were slightly scrunched up, almost as if he was preparing to yell and shout a great deal, which he most likely did so often, that his face had permanently changed because of it.

When all the Dursleys had finished their meal, there was very little food left, only a few scraps as well as the food that was to be my reward for completing the quest. Speaking of… Ping! There we go.

Quest Completed

You have gained:

50xp

1x piece of toast

1x piece of bacon

1x sausage

£0.50

Your relationship with the Dursleys has increased by 0.1

I quickly snatched up the food rewards as I read the message. Now my xp was at 161, only 39 away from leveling up, and I had a small amount of money to my name. It was only 50 pence, but it was something. I was rather pissed off that the almost pointless change in reputation but in the end it wouldn't even matter that much. I didn't give 2 shits about the Dursleys. Not even Dudley. He'd only grow up to be a criminal so including him in my vengeance was just stopping that problem before it becomes a problem. My revenge would be slow coming but oh so satisfying. By the time I was leaving for Hogwarts all my debts with the Dursleys would be settled in full. Mwa ha ha ha haa. Once again needs work. Not feeling particularly hungry just yet, I sent the food to my inventory, as I pretended to stuff it into my pocket. No need for the Dursleys to know about my new powers just yet. Or ever in fact.

As I was leaving the kitchen, I stole a glance at the calendar which read Monday 14th September 2007. The date was somewhat surprising as I had died in 2016. So Harry's universe was set 9 years in the past. Well it could have been worse. It could have been in the 90's. All my references would have been useless then! I crawled back into the cupboard and retrieved an almost unusable backpack, that was almost as full of holes as the Lord of the Rings movies' plot (Ooh here come the flamers with their pitchforks and torches). I searched around the cupboard for my school supplies and quickly filled my "new" bag with the secondhand items. Broken pencils, half filled ink pens, and books with many a page missing. Truly it was pathetic, and very pitiable. Note to self, get better supplies.

With my equipment, substandard as it was, all together, I opened my menu to the map, searched for a school building and sure enough there was a location marked Guildford County School. I marked it on my map and a little dotted line showed me the route to get there, just like it had earlier. Only this time I would actually need the route given to me considering I had no idea where to go. Yeah, Harry's file had the names and pictures of his school friends but no directions to his actual school? Being kinda lazy on the info gathering there Maria. With this cynical thought in my head, I adjusted my bag, threw open the door and took my first steps into this new and mysterious world. Well alright not that new, more old considering I was in my past. But it was still mysterious. Well not right now, but it was going to be. Eventually. Sigh, this feels like it's gonna take a really long time.