Thank you guys for all the love, once again! Please Enjoy and Review.
'' You're up early,'' I say walking into the living room where Amanda stands looking out the window wall, towards the early morning sun.
'' I have a breakfast meeting with a new client,'' she replies without turning from the beauty that is Seattle at sunrise.
I frown at her distance, usually a morning after sex would include sex jokes and some stupid comment but now…it seemed like we were guilty for doing what we did. After the sex was done all we did was turn away from one another and laid in the bitter silence. Round two wasn't even a prospect in our minds, not like it usually was.
'' Amanda, last night-''
'' Was awkward,'' she says turning around to face me, her beautiful face full of remorse and her vixen look nowhere in sight. '' Sex, sex with each other is usually hot and wild and so amazing but…'' she sighs running a hand through her curled locks.
'' But this time it wasn't,'' I finish for her, coming to stand in front of her.
'' No, no it wasn't,'' she smiles sadly.
'' Hey, it's okay-''
'' No it's not,'' she cuts me off. '' None of this is okay. I had sex with a hot guy that happens to be my best friend and I felt nothing but…but guilt. It's like I cheated with you.''
She stole the words right out of my mouth. Everything in me screamed I had made a mistake by using Amanda to get rid of the sexual tension I had felt with Olivia, and all I had earned in return was another reason to dislike myself more.
'' This can't be happening Theo, I don't have feelings for anyone-''
'' There's a first time for everything. I don't feel so happy about myself either,'' I say rubbing her shoulders forcing her to look up at me. '' Amanda you might think you don't need a man or the palace for a house, but something tells me that black cold heart of yours does,''
She shoves me and giggles at my teasing voice, her turquoise eyes lighting up. Running my hands down her soft face I move to give her a peck on the corner of her glossy lips.
'' How did you come to be so smart?'' She asks once I pull away from her lips.
'' I grew up,'' I reply giving her my charming smile.
'' I hope you find the woman you need, Theo. She's out there somewhere,'' she says pulling me into a hug.
I think I've already found her…
'' I'm fine for right now,'' I tell her instead of responding with my last thought.
'' No you aren't. I've known you since we were kids you can't hide your feelings from me. You have to let go of the hurt, Theo. Lillian was a bitch that fucked up in the worst way possible, but you need to move on.''
'' Easier said than done,'' I reply bitterly moving away from her. Amanda was the only person that dared name the girl I had once loved, that deep down I think I still do. I also know Amanda practically ripped off Lillian's face after what she did.
'' You can't be alone forever,'' she says moving up to me.
'' I won't. I plan on marrying you before I turn forty,'' I joke but she doesn't even let out an exasperated sigh.
'' You deserve more than a girl that works 24/7 and doesn't pretend her parents aren't sleeping with other people. I drink a martini daily to forget how I actually come home to a lonely apartment that feels like an iceberg. I've only had one real relationship in college and he dumped me because I cared more about making daddy proud than going out and being young. I don't want to be married because I don't want to be like my mom, a socialite that pretends to be happy but at night screws her yoga instructor,'' she whispers.
'' You could learn to love me,'' I shrug pulling her in for a much needed hug. I had known for years her parents were seeing other people but Amanda always turned a blind eye. She would smile and ignore the looks from people just like I did.
'' I do love you. I'm just not in love with you and you aren't in love with me either.''
She was right, like always. Amanda and I shared many similarities but there were times where we just couldn't stand each other and times where we only had sex, and left right after. A marriage between us would end up in divorce or just a life of loneliness. I couldn't ruin our friendship by up and marrying her just for the sake of not being alone.
'' We're fucked up people, aren't we?'' I ask giving her head a peck.
'' The fuckiest of fuck,'' she mumbles. '' I really made a mess of things-''
'' With Aiden?''
I feel her nod against my chest, '' I'm Amanda Noel Carter, I have more balls than any other man and yet I run out like some…some- I might have lost the one man that wasn't intimidated by me,'' she sighs.
'' I'm not intimidated by you-''
'' Your dad is Christian Grey that says it all he is the definition of intimidation. Besides, you've known me since I wore those overlarge bows and drank milk from my Tiffany's baby bottle.''
'' You'd still drink from a Tiffany's bottle if you still could,'' I joke. '' Amanda take some advice from me and live the life you want, not the one everyone expects you to.''
'' Says the guy that does everything to be the next Christian Grey. The day you stop living in your ivory tower I'll up and marry the first guy I find just for you.''
'' The first guy you find, really? I think you should just marry that Aiden Vandervick guy.''
'' After the humiliation I suffered in his arms-''
'' And the immense pleasure,'' I add teasingly.
'' Shut up. Aiden Vandervick isn't my future Theo and like I said I won't marry until your rich ass is riding off in the sunset with some blonde princess,'' she says before walking off towards her oversized kitchen.
'' Blonde, how do you know she'll be blonde?'' I ask picking up my jacket where it laid forgotten on the floor after last night's events.
'' Please, like you'd marry someone that wasn't blonde,'' she scoffs grabbing her clutch from the kitchen counter.
Before I can respond my BlackBerry sounds off, checking the caller I groan in annoyance. Can't this damn woman take a damn hint?
'' Who is it?'' Amanda asks fixing her lilac toned blazer.
'' Rebecca Collins,'' I reply hitting ignore on my cell.
'' The annoying reporter? The one that works with your Aunt Kate in the fashion segment? The fake blonde bimbo?'' She arches her brow.
'' She's not blonde?'' I ask.
'' No, have you not seen the horribly dyed eyebrows?''
'' No, not really actually I mostly just saw the back of her…repeatedly,'' I shrug.
'' Gross! Theo, tell me you didn't screw that hyena. I thought you had better taste than that,'' she gags.
'' I might have,'' I mumble.
'' And you dared put Teddy Jr. in me after it was in that slut!'' She growls.
'' It was two weeks ago,'' I try defending myself and my partner in crime.
'' Disgusting! I hope you went to the doctor right after, to check for any diseases.''
'' I'm clean as a whistle, Amanda-''
'' I can't believe you did her, how the hell did that happen?''
'' It was at a benefit dinner, she was there, a few drinks…then I bent her over a few times,'' I answer her remembering the stupid mistake of fucking the bobble head blonde-well fake blonde.
'' So why is she calling after her five seconds of fame-''
'' It was more like a few hours-''
'' I don't need specifics, Theo.''
'' She hasn't stopped calling ever since,'' I finally tell her.
'' Well, good job that's what you get for screwing her,'' she says as she passes by me, giving me a peck on the cheek.
'' You're leaving?''
'' That's why I'm dressed. I have to pay rent, don't I?''
'' You pay rent?'' I laugh knowing well her dad had bought the entire floor for her, not wanting his little girl to have any pesky neighbors.
'' A saying, anyway lock up and be free to wander around the place,'' she pecks me on the lips before opening her door.
'' Hey, Amanda?'' I call out to her.
'' Yeah?''
'' Would you ever go out to breakfast with me?'' I ask remembering my dad's words of finding a girl that would eat an early meal with.
'' I'll do brunch,'' she smiles.
No, Amanda would never have breakfast unless it was to close a deal with a client. Maybe she was right, I had to find that girl that would and let go of my pain once and for all.
'' Brunch sounds good,'' I smile back pulling her in for a quick hug.
'' Sunday?'' She asks.
'' Sunday, sounds good and I'll take you on The Grace for some sailing.''
'' Is that what you do for all the ladies?'' She teases pressing the down button.
'' Just for you darling, laters baby,'' I wink as she steps into the elevator.
Giggling she waves her goodbye and blows me a kiss with a final '' laters.'' Walking back into her condo I retrieve the rest of my clothes and clean up the mess we had made last night. I pick up the now broken porcelain lamp and take note to replace it for her. Once the chairs are put back in place and I find my car keys tangled in our clothes I leave her condo, and the door locks automatically.
The drive back to Escala is rainy, but not so much as yesterday. The seven in the morning streets are already buzzing with life yet the real traffic hasn't begun. Pulling into the underground garage I park the car and quickly make my way to the penthouse.
Marie is already in the kitchen when I step in. Thompson as well, sits on one of the stools looking over some files and it isn't until I close the door that they notice my arrival.
'' Good morning, Mr. Grey,'' they both greet.
'' Morning,'' I reply setting my keys down in the glass bowl by the door.
'' Can I offer you breakfast?'' Marie asks.
I look down at my watch and see I have barely enough time to shower and get ready. A small breakfast would have to do and I could just have a bigger lunch with mom.
'' My usual tea and an English muffin, please,'' I tell her before turning to Thompson. '' Can you have the car ready in thirty minutes?''
'' Certainly, sir,'' he replies tucking his papers away and heading to his office.
I quickly strip once I'm in my bedroom and with no time to spare I jump into the chilly water before it turns hot. The water relaxes my tense muscles as I think about what Amanda had said. We had never really had such a heart to heart she wasn't the girl that showed weakness to anyone. This Aiden guy really must be special to get her to that level. She had also told me in my face what no one dared to say, she wanted me to move on from Lillian. I know I should follow her advice but that eighteen year old kid inside of me doesn't want to let the memories go.
'' She's out there somewhere…''
Those were the words Amanda had spoken and something in me shouted I had already found her. I had found that woman in Olivia Hart. Yet the rational part of me scoffed and screamed you just met her idiot, how could you fall for someone you barely knew?
My parents had done the same thing though, hadn't they? They had married only two months after meeting each other and then nine months later I was born.
I think about Olivia and wonder if that was possible between us. I knew she was attracted to me and I was most definitely attracted to her. The guilt for sleeping with Amanda after I had practically envisioned making love to Olivia was proof enough. She really was a fireball in a matter of a day she had come out of nowhere and disrupted the way I lived. Her shining personality and her thrive for more captivated me, and I was definitely not blind when it came to her looks. God was she beautiful. From her luscious blonde locks to her emerald green eyes, and those beautiful breasts that had clung onto her wet shirt. That adorable beauty mark on the right swell…god I would love to spend hours kissing those breasts.
I groan as I remember my night with Amanda and how I had pictured Olivia under me, taking in every inch of me and meeting each thrust. The whimpers and moans as I lost myself in her sweet wet embrace again and again. I feel my length getting hard and ready for action as I envision her beautiful face staring up at me in wonder, and like some tween I take hold of it. I run my hand over the wet length fisting it as I pump once…twice…once more…
'' God,'' I moan as I give myself the pleasure my body craved.
I envision my little fireball putting her mouth and hands to work. The imaginary Olivia sucks and sucks, and my body arches as I feel the pleasure build up.
'' Fuck,'' I cry out as I reach my release. I rest my head on the cool shower wall and try to catch my breath as the aftershocks continue down my spine and all through my body. After I'm calm the embarrassment begins to set in and the imaginary Olivia is nowhere in sight.
What the fuck was that? I just pleasured myself in my shower with thoughts of my assistant!
'' How old are you Grey?'' I growl to myself.
Fuckin hell! I just came like a pubic brat that had never seen a rack before in his life.
'' She has a nice rack, though,'' I tell myself.
Now how the hell am I going to look her in the eye? I had just fucked her mouth…well the imaginary her.
'' I'm screwed,'' I say into the shower wall before grabbing my sponge to clean myself up.
'' I hope so…'' A voice in my head says happily.
Hope you guys liked! We couldn't just have Olivia think naught thoughts, now could we? Review please.