Story 5: "White Twilight"

Summary: The sequel to Story 4 - "Dark Secrets", in which we learn Central's true motives for allowing Allen and Kanda to marry.

Contains mpreg and character death (secondary characters).

.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

Komui Lee was in the archive room at headquarters, wandering through the stacks of records. He was being especially stealthy. If anyone found out that he was looking for something pertinent to the experiment he was working on, they'd make him stop. That's what lead him to the dusty corner in the back. These were the records that no one ever needed, so there'd be no reason for anyone else to be in that section.

Eventually he forgot his mission and gave in to his curiosity. He had found some records that seemed out of place. At first glance, they appeared to be medical records on past exorcists. This dusty old corner wasn't where they should have been. So he pulled out the whole box and took it back to his office. He wanted to know why they had been misfiled.

Safely at his desk, he began to look through the files in depth. The pattern was obvious immediately. The data was from eight different exorcists: all male, all in their twenties at the time of the records, and all accommodators of parasitic Innocence fragments. It sounded suspiciously like a certain white haired exorcist who was loved by everyone at headquarters. Komui dug deeper into the files, and what he read made his heart stop.

He bolted from his office and straight into his little sister, almost upsetting the cart of coffee she was pushing. "Nii-san? What's wrong?"

"Are Allen and Kanda here?" He was too disturbed to give in to the desire to fawn over his sister.

Lenalee blinked at the abrupt question. "Yes, they were heading to the cafeteria last time I saw them."

"Can you go tell them I need to see them?"

"Of course." She nodded politely and started to walk away.

Komui called after her. "Tell them it's urgent. It can't wait for Allen to finish eating."

Hearing that, she picked up speed and ran off. The Supervisor returned to his office. He sat back at his desk, and flipped through the files once more. It seemed like hours passed before the two exorcists arrived.

Kanda Yuu and Allen Walker-Kanda had been married for six months. In some ways, they had grown more alike, and in some, they were as different as ever. They came into Komui's office, Kanda grumbling and swearing, and Allen quiet and polite.

The Supervisor watched Allen critically. Was it his imagination, or had the young man gained a little weight around the middle? He shook his head. It had to be the first option; he was only seeing it that way because of the files he'd just finished going through.

Kanda growled from the chair he'd sat down in. "Get on with it, Komui. What was so damn important that it couldn't wait until after dinner?"

Komui took a deep breath and kept his gaze locked on Allen. "I was going through some old files and I found something that the two of you need to know."

"And what would that be, Komui?" The way the Chinese man was staring at him made Allen nervous.

"It's possible for male parasite-type accommodators to have children."

Allen and Kanda shared a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

Komui was briefly confused by their confusion. "Sorry, that came out wrong. I meant: it's possible for them to have children in the same way a woman would. The Innocence changes their bodies in such a way that it allows them to conceive and bear children."

"Wait." Kanda couldn't believe what he was hearing. It had to be some sort of cruel joke. "You can't actually be saying that it's possible for the Moyashi to get pregnant."

Komui's nod silenced Allen before he could protest. "That is what I'm telling you. If you two continue like you have been, Allen's going to end up pregnant."

Allen was suddenly glad he hadn't finished eating. That news made him sick to his stomach. "Why now? Why wasn't I told this years ago?"

"I called for you the second I found out." Komui smiled gently, hoping to placate the young men before one of them lost their temper. "The information was in a disused section of the archives, almost like someone was trying to hide it. I stumbled onto it by accident."

"Why would that information be hidden?" It took everything Allen had to keep his voice level.

Komui sighed. "According to these records, there was a time when the Order was experimenting on male parasite-types; forcing them to have sex with other male exorcists until they got pregnant. The goal was to see if their babies would also be parasite-type accommodators."

When he paused for breath, he surveyed the two carefully. Kanda was as angry and impassive as always, which wasn't surprising given the experiments that he had personally lived through. Allen was on the verge of tears. The young man looked like he was going to say something, but instead he flat out fainted.

Kanda barely caught his husband before he fell to the floor. He eased the young man the rest of the way to the ground, settling Allen's head in his lap. The samurai was actually laughing, if only just a little.

It wasn't until Lenalee arrived with coffee for her brother that they were able to wake Allen. Neither of the men had much experience in dealing with unconscious people.

With Lenalee present, they couldn't continue their conversation. Komui tried to tell her it was private, but she wouldn't tolerate them keeping secrets from her. Not after the events leading up to Allen and Kanda's marriage.

Kanda rolled his eyes at the arguing siblings. "It's the Moyashi's secret. Shouldn't it be up to him whether or not she finds out?"

Lenalee immediately focused on Allen. "Pleeeaaaaseeee?"

Allen sighed. There weren't any reasons, outside of embarrassment, that he could think of for not telling Lenalee. He smiled shakily at her. "We just discovered that it's possible for me to get pre-..."

He clasped a hand over his mouth and shook his head. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. He couldn't say the word, not in that context.

Lenalee blinked at him. Concern was written all over her face. "Allen? What is it?"

Allen only shook his head some more. Kanda snickered. "The word he can't say is 'pregnant'. It's possible for the Moyashi to get pregnant."

The color drained from Lenalee's face. She looked back at Allen. "You mean you're going to have a baby?"

"NO!" Allen was mortified by the conclusion she had reached. "We're saying it's possible, not that I am!"

She relaxed a little. "Oh, good. That would be too weird."

"Because this isn't?" Kanda rolled his eyes at her reaction. "Can we get back to business, Komui?"

"Of course." The Supervisor nodded as he began cleaning up the files. "Given this new development, the two of you need to be careful when you ... sleep together. You know, use protection and all that. Though maybe that could go without saying. I can't imagine the two of you actually wanting to make a baby. But you should know that, because you're married, if Allen does end up pregnant, you will have to raise the baby. There will be no giving it away, even with the war going on."

The couple nodded solemnly. Lenalee was trying not to laugh at the idea of Allen and Kanda raising a baby. Komui placed all the files back in their box and offered it to Allen. "You should read these reports, Allen. There are some things you should know that are explained much better in them than I could."

Allen took the box. "Anything else?"

"Be careful with those. And come back to talk to me when you're done. You're free to go back to dinner now."

The white haired young man bowed slightly and left the office, his husband at his heels. They didn't go back to the cafeteria. Instead, they went to their rooms; after their marriage, they'd been moved into a suite: a larger bedroom with an attached living room and private bathroom.

Allen dropped the box unceremoniously on the couch, then went to the bedroom and collapsed on the large bed in a heap. Kanda lay beside him and pulled his lover into his arms. They stayed that way until Allen finished crying. His voice was hoarse when he finally spoke. "This is awful..."

Kanda snorted. "No, it's not. The only thing that's changed is that we have to start using condoms."

"And what happens if we forget?" Allen didn't even bother to look up.

"Then you'll have to top."

"That's not what I meant, Yuu."

Kanda rolled his eyes and rolled Allen over so that they were facing. "Allen. We've been together for years and nothing's happened. One screw up isn't going to suddenly change everything."

He smirked at the face Allen made. "Besides, Komui was wrong. If it was up to me, I'd take you here and now, and not let up until you got pregnant."

Allen blinked slowly at him. "That's not a funny joke, Bakanda."

"It's not a joke, Moyashi." Kanda stared serenely down at his confused spouse. "If all that mattered were my feelings, if we weren't in the middle of a war, then I would knock you up in a heartbeat. After hearing the news, I've found that I want nothing more than to have a child with you."

"That's not gonna happen."

"I know." Kanda smiled wistfully and brushed his fingers through his husband's snow white hair. "I know that getting pregnant is already your worst nightmare. And I know that there's a war going on. But it doesn't hurt to dream."

Allen was silent. He had fallen asleep. Kanda laughed lightly as he removed his husband's coat and boots, and tucked him into bed.

.x.x.

The next day was spent going over the files with a fine tooth comb. Allen focused his attention on the medical records, wanting to know every minute detail of how the new development affected his body. Kanda sat with him, a permanent frown etched on his face as he read the accounts of the experiments. As familiar as he was with the Order's cruelty, it was still surprising to him that more than half of the exorcists involved in the decades-long project died as a result of it.

The project started over fifty years earlier, when a male parasite-type exorcist started showing the symptoms of pregnancy. Medical tests revealed that he was indeed pregnant. The man and his exorcist lover were slated to be executed for homosexuality after the baby was born. But when the baby was born with a parasitic Innocence, the execution was cancelled: one of the superiors got the idea to see if all male parasite-types were capable of bearing new accommodators.

Over the course of the next twenty years, twenty five male exorcists were coerced or blackmailed into joining the project: eight parasite-types, and seventeen equipment-types. The equipment-types would be tossed aside if they failed to impregnate their assigned mate or if the resulting child wasn't an accommodator. The parasite-types were stuck until they died or they reached an age where they were considered too old to bear children.

Fourteen babies were born because of the project, thirty if you included miscarriages and stillbirths, and only three turned out to be accommodators. The project was finally shelved when one of the scientists figured out that they were losing more accommodators than they were creating: eighteen of the exorcists involved had died, either by suicide or from medical complications, and only three new ones had been born.

Allen and Kanda were thoroughly disgusted by what they were reading. But the thing that disturbed Allen the most was how familiar it all sounded. The pregnancy symptoms described in the files were all things he had been feeling over the past few months. He had convinced Kanda that the vomiting was because of a stomach flu, but now he wasn't so sure. Every new thing he read was saying that Komui hadn't gotten the information to them soon enough.

Kanda knew something was bothering Allen, but he let it go. It was probably just the brat's kind-hearted nature reacting to the awful things they were reading.

.x.x.

The pair sitting in front of Komui had the expressions he expected them to have: Kanda looked pissed and Allen looked depressed. A little too depressed actually. Maybe giving him those files wasn't such a great idea.

"There isn't really anything more for us to talk about, you both know firsthand that the Order is no stranger to human experimentation, so you know that everything you read is true. I just wanted to make sure you understand the severity of what could possibly happen." Komui waited for the two to nod before he continued. "I can't order you to not get pregnant, that's not something you can control. And you're married, so I can't order you to not have sex. So will you at least promise to do everything you can to make sure it doesn't happen?"

When Allen spoke, his voice was so quiet that the other two almost missed what he said. "Actually... I think it ... already has..."

"Hmm? What's already happened?" Komui had no clue what the young man was trying to say.

Allen's gaze dropped to his lap. He summoned all his courage to say the words that terrified him. "... I think I'm pregnant."

You could have heard a pin drop, the others were so shocked. Allen's unshed tears were audible when he explained. "All those symptoms that were described in the reports, I've had almost all of them over the past couple months. The vomiting finally stopped about two weeks ago..."

Kanda rolled his eyes. So that's what was bothering the Moyashi. "Relax, Moyashi. That doesn't mean anything. You're just overreacting."

Komui wasn't quite so sure. He moved swiftly over to Allen and knelt beside him. Paying no attention to the young man's personal space, the Supervisor quickly opened Allen's shirt and placed a hand against his bared midsection. The skin was firm to the touch. It wasn't his imagination; the young man did have a bit of a bump there. "You said the morning sickness has already passed? What about the other symptoms? Any mood swings? Back pain? Indigestion? Issues with any particular foods?"

A snicker from Kanda interrupted the Supervisor's panicked rant. "The way he eats there'd be no way to tell."

Komui didn't have the patience for the samurai's attempt at humor. "You're his husband. You're supposed to notice these things. Yet you didn't notice that he was throwing up or that he's gained weight around the middle?"

"I did!" Kanda was highly insulted by the insinuation that he wasn't a good husband. "He said it was a stomach bug, and it passed, there was no reason to believe it was anything else. Also, he eats ten times as much as a normal person; I just figured it was finally catching up to him."

"And what about the other symptoms?" Komui challenged Kanda intentionally; he'd get more accurate answers out of the samurai than out of Allen.

"He cries a lot, but the Moyashi's a crybaby." Kanda rolled his eyes. "And he's irritable, but he's always irritable around me. And as far as pain goes: since when does that brat ever tell anyone that he's in pain?"

"Yuuuu..." Allen whined at the semi-insults his spouse gave.

Kanda huffed, his personal version of an exasperated sigh. He hadn't been lying when he said he wanted to get Allen pregnant, but the timing on this was too weird. "Yes, his back sometimes bothers him. He hasn't said anything, but I can tell from the way he moves. Plus sometimes giving him a back rub is the only way to get him to finally shut up and fall asleep."

Komui hummed and made other thinking noises as he continued to feel around Allen's belly. The symptoms combined with what his fingers were feeling... It wasn't surprising that Allen had reached the conclusion that he was pregnant; it was Komui's best guess too. But what bothered him most was that the young man's morning sickness had already stopped. It most likely meant that he had miscarried.

Allen felt himself pulled from his chair. He tried to fight it, but Komui dragged him to the infirmary. Kanda watched with a mixture of amusement and concern as Komui and the doctors ran test after test on his husband.

It seemed like forever before the test results came back, but not even half an hour had passed. Komui almost laughed at what he saw on the report. "Allen, you're not just pregnant, you're fourteen weeks pregnant. With twins."

Kanda was speechless. As much as he wanted it, he hadn't expected it to actually be true. And then to have that piled on top of it... How were he and the Moyashi supposed to raise two babies?

"Twins?!" Allen's voice cracked when he said that word. "Twins means two, right? And how is 'fourteen weeks' important?"

"Yes Allen, there are two babies inside you." Komui smiled slightly at the way that made Allen squeak. "And 'fourteen weeks' is how long they've been there. It means that the entire first trimester of your pregnancy has already passed. It's impressive that your babies are as healthy as they are, given that you went so long without knowing. Honestly, with your fighting style, you should have miscarried them."

Allen tried to talk, but no words came out. He was too overwhelmed. Komui smiled gently at him. "You've got twenty six weeks left of your pregnancy, probably a little less since twins are usually born early. In the meantime-"

"No missions. No training. Be careful with what I eat. Drink lots of water. Etcetera. I read the files." Allen smiled weakly. He wrapped his arms protectively around his middle. "Is this really happening? Am I really pregnant with twins?"

"You are."

"And do I really have to keep them?" One was ok. Mostly. He could handle one. In theory. And Kanda wanted one. That was how he'd been able to accept that he was pregnant without putting up a fight. But two...

The mixture of stress and panic in Allen's voice made Komui's heart ache. "Allen. Listen to me carefully." The Supervisor sat on the bed beside the young man. He placed a hand on his knee. "I'll be honest with you, if you were only carrying one, things would be different, but with twins there's only a fifty-fifty chance that even one of them will live."

Allen's eyes were wide with horror. Now that Komui had said it, he remembered reading that in the reports. It scared him more than he already was. Komui kept talking. "And to top it all off, you missed the entire first trimester. It's somewhat of a miracle that you haven't already lost them. You need to be prepared for the possibility that that could still happen. The cold hard truth is that you may never get to hold either of your babies."

Silence followed that last sentence. Komui smiled awkwardly. "I have no doubt that you'll beat the odds though, Allen. Which leads me back to your question. You never knew your parents; you grew up on the streets. Your husband's childhood memories are of scientists and laboratories. Lenalee was a young child when our parents died. Lavi-"

"What's your point?" Kanda finally found his voice. He was tired of listening to Komui ramble on like that. And the mention of their lost comrade actually upset him a little.

Komui sighed. "My point is that you of all people should know that your babies deserve to know their parents. They deserve a chance to be cared for by the people whose love created them. Especially if one or both of your babies are accommodators. The-"

"Fuck!" Kanda's loud curse interrupted Komui's lecture. "Those damn bastards knew all along, didn't they?"

Allen finally tore his gaze from his lap. "What are you talking about? Who's 'they'?

"Central." The samurai practically spat the word. "They knew about that damn project all along. They allowed us to get married because they knew the Moyashi would get pregnant with an accommodator."

"What made you jump to that conclusion?" Komui's initial confusion faded as he spoke. It really wasn't weird for the higher ups to have an ulterior motive.

"It was in those records." Kanda's next words made the other two freeze. "The only Innocence-compatible babies born during that damn project were born to the one homosexual couple. It isn't that big of a leap to figure that any child the Moyashi and I have would be too."

.x.x.

Allen and Kanda ran into Lenalee as they were leaving the infirmary. She immediately flew into a panic at seeing them there and rushed over to them. "What's going on? Are you two okay?"

"You may as well tell her. She'll pester you until you do. I'll meet you back at the room." Kanda laughed at the look on Allen's face and kissed the top of his head before he left.

"Kanda!" Lenalee called after him, but he didn't stop. When she turned back to Allen, he was looking at the ground and his hair was obscuring his face. "Allen? What's wrong?"

He sighed and leaned back against the wall. He was dreading telling her, but Kanda was right. "You remember that thing we talked about yesterday? Well, I am."

Lenalee blinked at him, trying to figure out what he was referring to with his cryptic statement. He merely waited in silence for her to put it together. Her eyes suddenly flew wide open. "You don't mean...!"

Allen sighed again. "Yes. I'm ...pregnant." That word was still hard to say. But he was just going to have to suck it up and get used to it. It was going to be true for the next six months after all.

She squealed and pulled him into a tight hug. "Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!"

He stared at her critically as he pushed her away. "What happened to 'that would be too weird'?"

"I changed my mind. That's allowed, isn't it?" She punched him lightly on the shoulder. "I want to see you and Kanda attempt to take care of a baby. It's going to be hilarious."

He glared at her and she laughed. "So, how far along are you? ... And were you lying to me the other day?"

Allen frowned at her. "I wasn't lying, I just didn't know yet."

She nodded. "And...?"

"Fourteen weeks."

Lenalee's eyes went even wider. "But that's three months! It took you three months to figure out you were pregnant?!"

Allen snorted and shook his head at her. "If Komui hadn't found those files when he did, I might not have figured it out for another three months."

"Oh. Right. It's not like you knew to suspect that." To break the tense atmosphere, she smiled brightly. "Is it a boy or a girl?"

Her attempt didn't work. Allen merely sighed again. "Komui says it'll be another six weeks before we can know that. And that even then it may not work."

"What do you mean?"

Allen sighed again. "Apparently having twins makes it more difficult to read their genders."

Lenalee nodded in agreement, but stopped abruptly when she realized what he'd just said. "Twins?! You're having twins?!"

"Yeah."

She hugged him tightly again. But this time she didn't let him go when he squirmed. Eventually he gave up and just stood there. "Will you let go?"

"No." She could feel Allen's slight baby bump through their hug, and while it was a bit weird, it was fascinating.

When Allen finally escaped, he went straight to his room. He collapsed on the bed without even acknowledging Kanda's presence. The samurai joined him, leaning back against the headboard. He nudged and pulled on his husband until Allen caved and situated himself in the other's lap.

Kanda kissed the back of Allen's neck as he unbuttoned his shirt and placed his hands on Allen's belly. "You're going to be okay, Moyashi. I know you're overwhelmed, so if you need to cry or faint or whatever, do it. But know that I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to be here for you and our children."

He couldn't help grinning at that phrase and the feel of the bump under his hands. It was happening fast, and there were so many risks involved, but he was thrilled all the same.

"Don't touch me like that." Allen shoved his husband's hands away with a heavy sigh. He couldn't deny that there was a small part of him that wanted to intentionally miscarry the babies. But he knew he wouldn't: no matter how much he didn't want to be pregnant or to raise babies, he desperately wanted them to live. It was terrifying to think that there was a possibility they'd die while they were still inside of him. Even Kanda and Komui knew his feelings: Allen had already been told that if things went wrong the doctors' orders were to ignore his protests and save his life over the babies.

Kanda smiled at his husband's attempts and moved his hands back to Allen's belly. Not even a moping Moyashi could ruin his mood. "I'm sorry I teased you about gaining weight, Moyashi. I wouldn't have done it if I'd known you were pregnant. It's amazing that this little bump is from our babies growing inside you."

When Allen's response was silence, Kanda kissed him again and continued talking. "Moyashi, you're going to be an excellent parent. I'll ...try, but you're just going to take right to it. And we're not going to be doing it alone. Lenalee will name herself their aunt and she'll literally beg to babysit. Teidoll is going to be ecstatic to have grandchildren. He'll dote on them and you. Komui, Jerry, the scientists, everyone here who loves you is going to love these babies. Even those who avoid you because you married me will fawn over your pregnant belly. It makes me sick just thinking about it."

That last sentence got a slight chuckle. And Allen had to admit that he did feel a little better. He was in over his head, but he wasn't alone. "That doesn't change the fact that I don't want them."

"And it shouldn't." Kanda had known that that would come up, so he'd been planning his answer. "You need to give it time. One day you'll wake up and realize that you love them, and then you're going to want to never let go of them. But it has to happen on its own; you can't force yourself to want them just because I do. And if it never happens, that's ok too. There's no shame in not getting attached to something that you know you're going to lose."

Kanda sighed when Allen whimpered at those words. "Moyashi, you heard what Komui said: the odds are that we'll lose at least one of the babies. So if you want to wait until they're born to decide you want them, that's fine. But I know you. You're going to grow so attached to our unborn babies that you're going to be completely devastated if you lose one."

Allen glared at his husband. But that only made Kanda laugh. "Don't worry about it right now, Moyashi. Just go to sleep or something."

Allen laughed, but was asleep the second he closed his eyes. He was so emotionally exhausted that he slept all the way through to the next morning.

.x.x.

Allen and Kanda sat at the breakfast table with Lenalee and some of the other exorcists. A very focused glare aimed at the Chinese woman told her to keep her mouth shut; they wouldn't be answering any of her questions. Allen tried to act like his usual self, but the knowledge that he was pregnant was making it hard.

And then Komui came into the cafeteria. He stood in the doorway, and cleared his throat to get everyone's attention. When the room grew quiet, he spoke. "I have an announcement to make."

Allen immediately looked at the Supervisor in a panic. Their eyes locked briefly, and it confirmed Allen's fears. "Komui, don't you dare."

The protest was heard, but ignored. Allen whimpered as he pulled on his hood and lay his head on the table, his arms wrapped tightly around his middle. He desperately wished he was anywhere else. "Our resident married couple is expecting their first child."

Confused whispers filled the room. Everyone knew that Komui was talking about Allen and Kanda. Someone spoke up from the back. "Could you please explain that better? It kind of sounds like you're saying that one of those two men is pregnant."

"I am." Everyone had expected Komui to correct him. "Specifically, Allen Walker-Kanda is fourteen weeks pregnant."

All eyes turned to Allen, who groaned and tried to hide more. Kanda, with a permanent glare fixed on Komui, pulled his husband onto his lap and let the white haired man bury his face in his chest. Those nearest to the pair saw the tears in Allen's eyes. And it all proved that what the Supervisor had said was true.

A different voice came from the crowd. "How is that possible?"

Komui forced himself to look anywhere but at Kanda, though he could continue to feel the Japanese man's murderous gaze. "To put it simply, Allen is the host of a parasitic Innocence. And because he is a male in a homosexual relationship, that Innocence changed his body to make it possible for him to get pregnant."

All but five people murmured statements of shock or awe. Allen was crying. Lenalee was trying to calm him down. Kanda was still glaring murder at Komui. And Krory and Timothy, the Order's other two male parasite-types, looked and felt like their heads were about to explode. Not only had they just learned that Allen, one of their best male friends, was pregnant, but they also learned that it was possible for the same thing to happen to them.

Three things happened all at once: Kanda picked up Allen, ready to storm out, Krory fainted, and... Leverrier stepped into the cafeteria.

Allen's tears stopped immediately as burning anger replaced humiliation in a heartbeat. His mood swings were out in full force that morning. Fortunately for Leverrier (and unfortunately for everyone else), Kanda was oblivious to Allen's sudden switch and kept his hold on his husband.

The blond man cleared his throat. He looked straight at Allen with an expression of contempt; it was clear he was disgusted with idea of a pregnant man. "As of this moment, Allen Walker-Kanda's status as an exorcist is revoked. We have reason to believe that the child he is carrying is Innocence compatible, and so, until the child is born, Walker's primary duty will be to make sure nothing happens to it."

Komui gave Leverrier an odd look before turning back to the crowd. "What Secretary Leverrier means to say is that Allen will be placed on maternity leave until he has recovered from his pregnancy and his child is old enough to be away from him, at which point he will resume his duties as an exorcist."

Leverrier openly sneered at Allen. "Now, Walker, if you would come with us..."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"I said no." Allen worked himself free of Kanda's grasp and approached Leverrier. "I had a complete medical exam yesterday. Hevlaska can't tell if a baby is a potential accommodator until it's over a year old. Which means that you want to lecture me about getting pregnant. To which the only thing I have to say is: I'm married. What I do when I'm alone with my husband is none of your damn business. If you didn't want me to end up like this then you shouldn't have approved our marriage."

The entire cafeteria applauded when he finished talking. Allen stalked out of the room with his head held high. Kanda followed after him with a smirk on his face; he knew it was the hormones that made Allen act like that, but it was nice to see the brat show his backbone.

.x.x.

The next six months passed far too slowly for Allen. He wanted nothing more than to no longer be pregnant. Initially it was because he never wanted to be pregnant in the first place, but as Kanda had predicted, Allen soon loved his babies so much that he couldn't wait to hold them in his arms.

Komui's warnings of miscarriage were never completely forgotten; they haunted Allen's dreams, turning them into nightmares in which he watched his children die. But despite all that, Allen was determined to see his pregnancy through to the end, with both of his babies alive and well.

For the bystanders at the Order, the most intriguing part of Allen's pregnancy was watching him turn into an overprotective mother. The bigger his belly got, the more he fawned over the babies inside it. It was even more fascinating than watching the fierce and stoic Kanda Yuu play the doting husband.

Between carrying twins and his slender frame, Allen's belly was a sight to see. But he was strong and stubborn, if the added weight slowed him down, no one but Kanda would ever know. And he did know. He knew that Allen was physically miserable, but he also knew that the white haired young man was so in love with his unborn children that he didn't care.

The event that really changed Allen's attitude towards his pregnancy happened when he was about twenty one weeks along. And it scared everyone who was around. He was having lunch in the cafeteria, when he suddenly burst out crying in the middle of the meal. No one knew what had happened or what to do. They had learned early on that trying to intervene with one of Allen's mood swings only caused more problems. All they could do was wait for him to stop crying. But he never did.

And that was how Lenalee found him when she returned from her latest mission: sitting in the cafeteria, silently sobbing and rubbing his belly. She knew from one glance that whatever was going on was deeper than hormones. Approaching him carefully, she sat beside him and placed a hand on his knee. "Allen? What's wrong?"

It wasn't until he looked up at her that she could see they were happy tears. He didn't say anything, just pulled her hand off his knee and placed it on his belly. Her eyes went wide; he didn't let anyone other than Kanda touch him like that. And then she felt what he was showing her, and she couldn't help crying alongside him. The feeling of one of his unborn babies kicking the spot where her hand rested was overwhelming. She wrapped her white haired friend in as tight a hug as she could without removing her hand from his belly.

Those first kicks changed Allen's mindset completely. He was surprised to find that he could already tell the difference between the twins; he knew which kicks belonged to his son and which ones came from his little girl. And it brought him to tears.

The babies stopped kicking, but Allen didn't stop crying. Lenalee may not have been told any of the details of Allen's pregnancy, but she was observant enough to have at least picked up that he hated what was happening to him. And as such, she knew that the real cause of his emotional breakdown wasn't solely the joy of feeling the babies' first movements. She gently coaxed him to his feet and towards his room; he needed privacy.

They met up with Kanda in the hall just outside the cafeteria. He took the crying Moyashi from the Chinese woman without a word, and the couple returned to their room.

.x.x.

Komui had been monitoring Allen's growth, weight gain, and other various vital signs ever since they'd learned of his pregnancy. And what he was seeing wasn't good. Allen was consistently and severely underweight. No matter what or how much the young man ate they couldn't get him up to a healthy weight.

And that was just the tip of the iceberg.

Blood tests revealed that his hormone levels also weren't where they should be. Even when compared to the records from the past, and thus to other male pregnancies, Allen's results were all over the place; one day they'd be too low, and two days later they'd be too high. Attempts were made to make Allen less stressed, with the idea that that would correct his hormone imbalance. But all it did was make him more stressed; and the emotional stress from not being allowed to do things was far worse than the physical stress of doing them.

There were also concerns over Allen's heart. The fainting spell in Komui's office that first day hadn't been an isolated incident; Allen fainted almost once a week throughout the rest of his pregnancy. Komui did some tests and determined that the trauma his heart had suffered in the past, combined with the stress put on his heart by carrying twins, was affecting Allen's blood pressure and complicating his pregnancy.

All in all, there was now a ninety percent chance that Allen would miscarry at least one of his babies, and a sixty five percent chance he'd lose them both. And the odds were good that he'd experience a premature labor as well.

Bak Chan was brought in for a second opinion, and what he had to add scared Allen to the core. The Asian Branch Supervisor was surprised that Kanda had been able to get Allen pregnant in the first place. He admitted that he didn't know all the details of the Second Exorcist project, but he hadn't thought Kanda's sperm would be genetically viable. It didn't seem like something the scientists would have been concerned with when they were creating his artificial body.

More tests were done, this time on Kanda as well as Allen and the babies. Fortunately, Bak was proven wrong. Kanda's genetically altered body had nothing to do with the complications of Allen's pregnancy. If anything, it was most likely the reason the white haired young man hadn't miscarried back in his first trimester.

.x.x.

Allen literally looked ready to pop. The twins were full term. He could go into labor any day now. Not only had he not miscarried, but Allen was now forty weeks pregnant. It was nothing short of a miracle that all three had made it that far. Unfortunately, it also meant that Allen was more miserable than he'd ever been.

He didn't get out of bed for anything other than to eat or use the bathroom. And he needed help with even those most basic tasks; Kanda hadn't left his side in weeks. Allen tried not to take his frustrations out on the samurai, but the imbalanced hormones in his system made the mood swings difficult to control. The two were barely getting along anymore.

At lunch one day, someone finally asked the question that had been bothering everyone for the past few weeks. "So how exactly are those babies supposed to get out of you, Allen?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you're a man, right? You can't exactly give birth. So is the Supervisor planning to cut you open when the time comes? Or is there something else?"

Allen blushed, not that anyone could tell, his whole body was flushed with exhaustion. "Why do you want to know?"

This time it was Lenalee who spoke. "It just seems to us that if the plan was to surgically remove the babies, my brother could have done that already, and then you wouldn't be so miserable. Is he waiting for you to go into labor first?"

The question was rhetorical, but Allen nodded. Lenalee's eyes widened and she reached across the table to place a hand on Allen's. "Why?!"

He pulled his hand away and began rubbing the side of his swollen belly. His gaze dropped to his plates, and he remained silent. It was Kanda who spoke. "Che. You're wrong on something obvious. The Innocence that changed the Moyashi's body so that he could get pregnant also made it possible for him to give birth."

Allen's sigh filled the stunned silence that followed. He shifted slightly in his seat, trying to move his focus away from that spot between his legs. The birth canal had formed and opened two months earlier, and he was much too aware of it. "We're waiting for me to go into labor, because that is how the babies will be getting out of me."

"But couldn't they do the surgery anyway?"

Allen's frown deepened. "Only as an absolute last resort. It's far too risky. Doing so could kill the babies, and it would kill me. Giving birth is really my only choice." He didn't have the heart to tell them that a natural birth was almost as risky.

Lenalee blinked at her heavily pregnant friend for a moment before she was struck with an idea. She turned to the rest of the people in the room. "Does anyone know any tricks to make labor start?"

Everyone began shouting out their ideas. Someone produced paper and a pencil, and everything was scribbled down. When the chaos died down, Allen was given a list of a couple dozen old wives' tales for inducing labor. It contained everything from eating spicy food to sex. He frowned at the list before passing it to Kanda. "Really Lenalee? You think these will work?"

She laughed at his disbelief, though she wouldn't have been so jovial if she had been told just how dangerous Allen's pregnancy was. "Who knows? But it's better than sitting around waiting, right?"

"I guess." He sighed and pushed his empty dishes away from him. They were immediately whisked away by the observers.

When Kanda was done eating, he helped Allen up and they walked back to their room. Now completely alone, they pulled out the list and read through it. Most of it seemed stupid to the two men. Especially the ones centered around eating certain foods. Allen's stomach was a bottomless pit, how was eating that one little thing going to make a difference?

They had a good laugh about it. But then one of the babies started kicking, and Allen's good mood went out the window. And as such, he immediately began pushing Kanda's buttons. The samurai was trying to be understanding, but the brat was making it hard.

Kanda turned his attention from his obnoxious husband to the list and back again. One particular item had caught his attention. He didn't even remotely think it would work, but it was the only thing worth trying. And if all else failed it would at least put Allen in a better mood.

He helped Allen up from the couch and led him to the bedroom. "What are you doing, Bakanda?"

Kanda laughed as he helped Allen onto the bed. "I'm trying to help you get comfortable, Moyashi."

Allen snorted and winced, before reclining back against the pillows Kanda had placed for him. "If you really want to help, make your brats stop kicking me."

The samurai smiled inwardly, whenever Allen got especially irritated he'd deny ownership of the babies; it was very amusing. He placed a kiss on the swollen belly. "Does that help?"

"Of course not." Allen rolled his eyes.

Kanda snickered then went back to his plan. He sat at the foot of the bed and pulled Allen's feet onto his lap. The young man's shoes and socks were removed. His complaint of "Now my feet are cold!" was forgotten when Kanda began to massage his swollen feet and ankles.

The babies were still kicking, but his feet felt better than they had in weeks. And Kanda didn't stop there. When he was done with Allen's feet, he had his husband roll onto his side so that he could rub his back. The tense muscles relaxed so slightly under his touch, it didn't feel like he was doing anything. But to Allen it felt like heaven. He could feel his stress melting away.

Kanda rubbed his back all the time during his pregnancy, but never like that. Never with that much patience and attention. Allen was practically a puddle of goo when he was done.

Of course, that's when his water broke.

The young man winced as he felt the fluid trickle out of him. And the contraction that followed made the twins' kicking seem like cute little taps.

Kanda was startled by Allen's sudden scream. But he quickly understood what was happening. He carefully helped Allen sit up and get off the bed.

It took fifteen minutes for the pair to reach the door to the hall. The contractions were making it hard for Allen to walk. It was at that point that Kanda ran out of patience and picked the stubborn man up.

Allen objected to being carried, but Kanda didn't care about his pride. All that mattered was getting him to the infirmary.

.x.x.

When Allen's dinner time rolled around, Lenalee headed to the cafeteria. She was excited to help him try to induce his labor. He would fight it, but that would only make it more fun.

But Allen and Kanda weren't at their usual table. She initially thought she missed them, but after a quick talk with Jerry, she learned that they hadn't come down yet. She debated going to check on them, but that would only make Kanda mad. So instead, she grabbed some food and waited for them to come down on their own.

An hour later, Lenalee's dinner had been finished, but Allen and Kanda were still nowhere to be seen. She put her dishes away and then went to find them.

The path to their room was empty, but when she knocked, she got no answer. That was really strange; there wasn't anywhere else they would be. She knocked again; maybe they just didn't hear her.

When there was still no answer, she tried the door. It was unlocked and opened right away. Lenalee went inside, and looked around. It was dark and quiet. The two men weren't there, and there was nothing to indicate where they had gone.

She went back out to the hall to think of places they might have gone (she didn't want to be caught inside; they'd accuse her of snooping). The library and the garden seemed like her best bets.

Both spots turned up empty. And the people there hadn't seen either of them. It was over an hour of wandering before Lenalee happened to walk by the infirmary. The screams coming from inside scared her. But between the screams she heard what could only be Allen and Kanda bickering. She felt stupid. Of course Allen had missed dinner, he'd gone into labor.

She went into the reception area right as Kanda was leaving one of the private rooms. He gave her the briefest of glances then sat down in a chair. She smiled. "Did Allen kick you out?"

He rolled his eyes. "The nurse did. She thinks my presence is hindering his progress."

Lenalee smirked. "You mean she couldn't take any more of the two of you cussing at each other."

When Kanda only scowled more, she changed the subject. "How long has it been?"

He shrugged. "What time is it?"

"About eight thirty."

Kanda sighed heavily; he suddenly looked and felt exhausted. "Then it's been about seven hours."

Lenalee's eyes briefly widened. "You two tried something off that list, didn't you?"

The samurai snorted, but didn't respond. She took his 'you're an idiot' as a 'yes'. "What was it? Oh, I know! You two had sex! That's it, isn't it?!"

Kanda wanted to throw something at her, but there was nothing in range, so he had to settle for telling her to shut up. But that only egged her on. When Kanda couldn't take any more (which was only about ten seconds later), he caved and told her. "We never made it that far. His water broke before we even got started."

They were interrupted by a particularly loud scream. When it passed, Lenalee changed the subject. "So how much longer does he have to go?"

"Don't know."

"Kanda!"

"Che." He rolled his eyes at her tone. "The nurse said she'd come get me when it was time for him to start pushing."

And three hours later, she did. The first of their babies was born as the clock struck midnight. Allen and Kanda had a healthy and beautiful baby girl.

To Allen's horror, the contractions started up again immediately, he was given no time to rest. But that was the least bad of all the bad things that would happen that night.

The baby was breech. The doctors tried to correct it, but there were problems. One thing after another started going wrong. There was too much blood. They needed to keep Allen calm, ideally by drugging him and knocking him out, but Kanda wasn't going to let that happen without a fight, so he was given his newborn daughter and kicked out of the room once again.

In the end, there was nothing anyone could do: saving Allen's life was more important than saving the baby. Allen and Kanda's son was dead before he left his mother's body.

.x.x.

Kanda sat at his husband's bedside, cradling their daughter in his arms. The medication was wearing off, and Allen would be waking up soon. It had been decided the night before that Kanda would be the one to break the bad news to him. He still didn't know what to say. He didn't even know how he felt about the whole thing.

When Allen woke, he was really groggy. He didn't notice Kanda or the baby girl. His whole body hurt, especially the muscles around his middle and that spot between his legs. But the weight in his stomach was gone; it was a relief to no longer feel so heavy. No thought was given as to why. He blinked his eyes open, but the light was too bright and he had to close them again.

Kanda saw his husband's eyelids flutter and knew he was awake. He sighed. "Moyashi."

"Hmm?" Allen's eyelids fluttered again. He knew there was a reason he needed to be awake, but he couldn't recall it.

The way Allen was acting would have normally made Kanda smile, but he was in no mood for that. "Moyashi. Wake up."

"I'm awake." Allen's silver eyes stared at the ceiling. "...Mostly. What happened? Why does my body hurt so much?"

Kanda snorted at the question. "You gave birth last night, remember?"

"Oh... right." Allen blinked a few times. He recalled the screaming and the pain. Then the doctors started freaking out. And then there was nothing. "Are ... the babies ... ok?"

"Moyashi." Kanda sighed heavily. "Allen. Do you remember what Komui said back when we first learned you were pregnant?"

"Hmm?" Allen could not figure out what Kanda was talking about. But he was now awake enough to be aware of how deadly silent everything else was; combined with Kanda's reluctance to answer his question, it put him on edge. "No, I don't."

"Come on, Moyashi. He's also said it at every appointment." Kanda was starting to lose his patience; Allen was just too good at irritating him.

Kanda wanted Allen to say it himself, but when the brat remained silent, he had to say it for him. "'Don't get too attached, the odds are that babies aren't going to make it.'"

That woke Allen the rest of the way up. That was why it was so quiet. All that work was for nothing. His babies were dead. He started sobbing uncontrollably. It took several minutes for him to collect himself enough to form words. "Then our children are both..."

"No." The word made Allen's sobs abruptly stop. "Not both."

"What...?" Allen finally turned to look at his husband, silent tears still falling from his eyes. The silver orbs widened as he caught sight of the bundle in Kanda's arms.

The samurai smiled at Allen, holding the little bundle out towards him. He watched the joy fill his husband's eyes, thankful his scheme had worked. Instead of being upset over their dead baby, Allen was focused on their living one. "Do you want to meet our daughter?"

Kanda helped Allen sit up and lean back against the pillows. He gently moved the blanket wrapped baby into her mother's arms. Now Allen was crying for a different reason. "She's gorgeous."

"She is." Kanda smiled as he sat beside Allen. He wrapped his arms around the young man, helping him support the newborn. "You did it, Moyashi. You beat the odds. You brought a perfectly healthy little girl into the world."

Allen sighed. "Yes, but I lost our son."

"I know you're sad, Allen, but we've known from the beginning that something like this was going to happen. And it wasn't your fault. You did everything you could." Kanda kissed the top of his head. "I wish you could see it my way..."

"And what would that be?" Allen was almost scared to ask; knowing Kanda it was probably something calloused.

"You're alive."

Allen blinked, unable to break his gaze on his daughter to examine his husband's expression. "Huh?"

"Moya- Allen. If I had lost you, our babies would have ended up orphans."

Completely shocked, Allen finally managed to look away from his baby. Kanda was sincere. "But- but I thought you wanted the babies."

"Not without you." It was hard for Kanda to say out loud. "I never wanted to even care about another person, but you've got me so dependent on you that I can't imagine life without you. Not even our children could change that."

Allen was speechless. Kanda smiled and kissed the top of his white hair. "You're allowed to grieve. I would never expect you to be ok with losing a child. You can cry all you want. But don't do anything stupid. I need you. Our daughter needs you. You wouldn't want to disappoint her, would you?"

As if on cue, the baby girl began to get fussy. Kanda smiled at the panicked look on Allen's face. "What do I do?"

The samurai almost laughed at the question, but then, he only knew the answer because the nurses had already explained it to him. "Feed her. You've been unconscious since she was born, she's hungry."

Allen continued to look panicked and clueless. This time Kanda did laugh. "I know you're still groggy from the drugs, but you can't have forgotten that embarrassing conversation already."

"Oh." Allen turned bright red as he remembered the day just a week earlier when Komui had to explain to him that he was lactating.

With Kanda's help, he managed to get his shirt open while still keeping his hold on his daughter. He maneuvered her to his chest, and she latched onto his nipple without any coaxing. The couple fell silent as they watched their newborn feed.

Looking at his daughter, Allen couldn't help thinking about her dead brother. It would take time to recover from the loss, but Kanda had a point. This fragile little girl needed him; she couldn't even eat without him. She could have easily been like her brother; the medical teams had all said she wouldn't survive the birth either. It was a miracle that he even had her. That's what he needed to focus on: her, his daughter, his little miracle. He could grieve for her brother, but only so long as it didn't affect his ability to care for her. She was his priority.

"So what are we going to name her?"

Kanda blinked at the unexpected question, but he quickly realized that it meant that he had gotten through to Allen. "Do we have to do that now?"

Allen smiled happily up at his husband. It wasn't exactly his real smile, it was marred by grief and exhaustion, but it was far from the fake one that Kanda was expecting to see. "If we don't name her before everyone comes to see her, they'll try to do it for us."

Kanda balked at the thought. "Right, we can't let that happen."

In typical Allen and Kanda fashion, they couldn't even agree on a name for the baby they had made together. Their bickering attracted the nurse on duty, and she rushed to check on them. The sight that greeted her was relieving. Allen wasn't crying. The newborn wasn't ignored, she was held securely in her mother's arms and being nursed. The nurse vanished before she was noticed, off to tell Komui that Allen was actually doing well; he hadn't rejected the baby like they all feared.

Eventually Allen proposed a compromise. Kanda was insistent that their daughter have a Japanese name. So Allen had him list out all the names he could think of, he'd stop his husband if he heard one he liked. "Wait. Go back one. 'Erica'?"

"Actually I said 'Eriko'."

"Oh." Allen was a little dejected. He'd liked that one.

Kanda smiled at his husband. "But 'Erika' could also be Japanese. It would use the kanji for 'flower' instead of the one for 'child'. And she's definitely a flower."

Allen kissed him, and then turned to the baby in his arms. He lightly stroked her tuft of navy hair. "Hi Erika."

She blinked at him, and it was like she approved of her name. Kanda smiled and kissed the top of Allen's head. "It's perfect."

A knock at the door interrupted them. Komui stuck his head inside cautiously. "Can I come in?"

The pair nodded and turned back to their little girl. Komui continued to be careful as he approached the bedside; like the nurse had said, Allen was indeed holding the baby willingly, but the Supervisor was still scared he might upset him. "The nurse said you two were fighting. Is everything ok?"

Allen smiled brightly at him. "Not fighting, just disagreeing. We were trying to pick out a name for our daughter."

Komui blinked at the completely unexpected answer. He turned a questioning gaze on Kanda. The samurai shrugged in response and wrapped his arms around Allen once again. "We talked. It'll take some time, but he's going to be ok. Right, Moyashi?"

Allen's smile fell and he dropped his gaze down to his baby. It wasn't until he saw the drops landing on Erika's face that he realized he was crying. "I still feel like I failed, but I'm going to appreciate the baby I do have. She needs me."

Kanda smiled. "You're getting her wet, Moyashi. Eri doesn't need a bath just yet."

Allen giggled just a little as he wiped his eyes on his sleeve. "Sorry. ... ...'Eri'?"

"Yeah, she's so little, I couldn't help shortening it." Kanda tried to keep his tone nonchalant; there was no telling how Allen would react to the nickname.

"Well it's better than 'Moyashi'." Allen scowled at his husband, but with his tear-stained face, it looked more like a pout.

Komui smiled at the interaction. "Well, if you're ready, everyone would like to come see her. I know Lenalee's been pestering everyone she can to let her in."

Allen frowned. "I..."

Kanda hugged him tighter. "Moyashi, it's ok to say no. They'll understand."

"I know." Allen sighed. "But I... I feel like I need to act as normally as possible. If I just hide here alone, I'll get depressed. But if I see everyone, then I can keep moving forward and begin to heal."

Komui smiled. Despite Allen's words, it was obvious that he didn't want to see anyone just yet. "Alright, but let's see how it goes with just Lenalee before you decide if you're ready to see everyone else."

When Allen didn't object, the Supervisor left the room and ushered his sister in. Lenalee was appropriately excited, though it was tinged with sadness and anger. The loss of her nephew hit her hard, and it was definitely an understatement to say that she was upset with Allen for not telling her that his pregnancy was so risky. But she kept all that to herself, Allen didn't need to see it. Instead, she fawned over Erika, constantly telling Allen that her niece was the most beautiful baby she had ever seen.

.x.x.

There was no funeral for Allen and Kanda's stillborn son. It was against the Order's regulations. Even a child that small could become one of the Earl's akuma.

Or at least that's what Komui and the new parents agreed to tell everyone.

The truth was that Allen didn't want one. He wanted to focus on Erika and move on with his life. And he couldn't do that if everyone was making a big deal over Nolan's death. The couple said goodbye to their son privately that first day in the infirmary, and then they put it behind them.

That's not to say that Nolan was forgotten, Allen's caring nature wouldn't allow that. And even Kanda had moments where he wondered what life would be like if Nolan had lived. But they refused to let grief take them. Like Kanda wanted, Allen focused his attention on Erika, latching on to the rationale that it was a miracle that they even had her. Having a newborn kept them both busy, and that was exactly what they needed.

But no one, except for maybe the late General Cross, could have predicted how quickly Allen recovered. In his twenty one years he had become quite the expert at handling loss, having lost so many of the people closest to him: Mana, Nahrain and Mina, Cross, and most recently, Lavi. Compared to them, a baby that died before he ever got to meet it was no big deal. Allen was back to business as usual before Erika was a month old.

That was four months ago. The now five month old Erika had been weaned off her mother's milk, and Allen was back in fighting shape. He didn't want to leave his little angel, but it was time to resume his duties. All that was left was a final medical exam and then he'd be assigned his first post-pregnancy mission.

It was a formality. Allen was obviously in perfect health, both physically and emotionally; he was even at a healthy weight for the first time in his life. The outcome was so expected that Komui had already picked out the young man's mission. The exam was right after breakfast, and Allen was going to leave before lunch.

That didn't happen. The doctors determined that Allen was unfit to return to duty.

Allen honestly didn't know what to make of the results. He was both disappointed to not be cleared and thrilled to be able to remain with his baby. Komui read irresponsibility into the results; he lectured Allen for a good half hour before he realized that there was no real reason to be upset with the young man.

Kanda returned from his latest mission to find Allen in the cafeteria, with Erika in his lap, when the Moyashi should have already left. He approached his family and kissed the top of Allen's head. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what the hell are you doing here, Moyashi? Weren't you supposed to be on a mission?"

Allen shrugged and tousled Erika's hair, making the girl giggle. "I didn't pass my physical."

The baby was taken from him to get him to focus; Kanda was less than happy with that revelation. "How could you not pass, Moyashi?"

"I'm pregnant."

Kanda nearly dropped Erika. The baby thought it was great fun and her laughter echoed through the cafeteria. He gaped at Allen who was beaming up at him. "It only happened two weeks ago, so the symptoms haven't started yet, but we're going to have another baby."

"Moyashi..."

Allen stood and took Eri back from her father. "It's only one. We caught it early this time, too. And I'm not underweight anymore. The odds of losing it are lower than the odds of keeping Erika were. So there's no need for you to freak out, ok Yuu?"

"I'm not freaking out."

"Of course not." Allen snickered. The samurai concealed it well, but his husband knew him well enough to see through it. "I don't blame you for it though. It's so sudden. We only had Eri five months ago. I'm not sure I'm ready to be pregnant again. And-"

Kanda cut off his babbling with a kiss, Allen wasn't the only one who could read the other like a book. "Moyashi. Calm down. I'm not mad at you."

"You're not?" Allen blinked repeatedly. He was positive that Kanda would be pissed that he'd gotten pregnant.

"No, I'm not." Kanda laughed and kissed Allen again. "So if you want to be happy, go for it. You don't have to pretend for me."

Allen wrapped his arms around the samurai as best he could while holding the baby. The truth was that he was ecstatic to be having a second chance at being pregnant. He wasn't going to mess this one up. Even if he knew that losing Nolan wasn't his fault. "Thank you, Yuu. I love you."

"I love you too, Moyashi."

.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

A/N: To everyone who was concerned about Lavi: I didn't intentionally plan for him to be dead in this story. It just happened to work out that way. I didn't realize until I was writing the ending to the story that Lavi wasn't in it. Including him in Allen's list of lost friends was simply the easiest way to explain where he was without having to rewrite everything.