March 8th 1992
My intentions were to contribute to this book quite more often than I found myself doing, but I found myself buried in my work more times than not even on my off-time. My fear of commitment group seems to be falling apart. Their attendance has subsided, but I have high-hopes that some of the members will someday return. I have spent many hours in my study lately. One would think that I would find myself updating my diary, yet I find myself too intrigued with my case studies from work. I seem to have been spending less time with Maris and she seems to be getting… shall I say… a little bit self-centered and a trifle self-absorbing. Just last month, she took a flight to spend three days in Paris completely unaccompanied. Along with my fear of commitment group, I have a few patients dealing with intimacy avoidance and I have found their circumstances weighing heavily on myself. For Valentine's Day, I felt somewhat empty and troubled. Maris can't have chocolates. She breaks out in hives and she is allergic to any plant baring pollen. So I took her out to dinner at a quaint little restaurant. It was a quiet evening. Dining out causes Maris to tire easily. She has to fight to keep from wanting to ask more of the dining staff when she is used to the staff at home. That evening, she caught herself asking our waiter to massage her feet and she stopped herself in mid-sentence when asking the maître d to draw her bath. I will plan a romantic evening at home. I will update you with the results. Of course, you will only get the PG version.