June 15th 1993
Derek Mann has targeted Frasier through a brutal verbal attack through his newspaper column. This evolved into an auspicious bout outside of Café Nervosa where they were going to pummel each other with their fists. The police showed up and stopped the fight before it began. On the brighter side, I've hired a mariachi band for our summer barbeque.
Maris has started dieting to an extreme to which I refer to as "binge starving". Oh, it all started when her yoga instructor made a comment which was intended as an off-the-cuff bit of humor. He had told her that she had to be a few pounds short of levitation. The poor thing took it to heart. Sure Dad and Frasier laughed at this when I told them. They can see the humor in it. As for me, I'm now employing the services of a personal guru for Maris.
Abadah is his name. He is quite the eccentric. He spoke to me for an hour on the concepts of getting rid of my Steinway to allow more positive vibrations to reverberate throughout the room. He conveniently wrapped the idea around Hindu philosophy, but when it comes to my Steinway, I don't need to dive further into my profession to know who's head needs to be examined.
As far as levitation, the only thing that seems to be getting any lighter around here is my wallet.