"Kat, its fine. It's just one night. I'll be okay. I promise. Okay? Love you. Bye." The young performer ends the call and slips her cell phone back into the bag slung across her back. She smiles as she thinks of the girl on the other end of the line, first best friends, then eventually roomies. The slender brunette begins the short walk back to the apartment the two girls share in New York City. A sound in the bushes makes her jump, then chuckle and blush at herself for being easily frightened. This moments distraction is all he needs. The larger man grabs the petite girl from behind, covering her mouth as he drags her into a nearby alley. The threat of a gun and whispers about her roomie are all she needs to keep quiet. She struggles as he strips off her clothing but, though she's strong for her size, she's no match for the very muscular attacker. He finishes and pulls out of her, throwing her against the brick wall. He zips his pants and takes off into the shadows, leaving the girl frightened and in pain against the cold ground. Slowly, she makes her way to a sitting position and eventually stands. She maintains a brisk pace and an overactive state of alert the final block to the apartment. Trembling with full body shakes, she struggles to unlock the door. Once inside, she throws the door shut and locks it behind her. The adrenaline ebs and she sinks to the floor in shock. Kat will be home. Get up. Do something. She forces herself to get up from in front of the apartment door. She shakes as she makes a cup of coffee, knowing sleep is a very, very long way off.
"Litz, what did we say about coffee after 11pm?" The taller, elegant roomie grins at her best friend's quirks and the smell filling the apartment as she arrives home.
"I don't think it'll make much difference tonight." Kaitla's face falls at the higher tense tone of Elizabeth's voice. She hurries into the living room to find her roomie sitting on the sofa bed they share, her eyes exhausted and terrified.
"Honey….what's wrong?" Litzy stiffens as she sits near her and Kaitla's brows furrow deeper. It's been months since Elizabeth wouldn't let Kaitla touch her, years since she wouldn't allow her near. Elizabeth pauses before answering, staring into her coffee cup.
"You were right…you did have cause for concern…."
"Baby what happened?"
"I was wrong. I didn't end up okay…."
"Love, whatever this is, we'll get through it. You just have to tell me what happened. Honey it's okay. I love you." The affirmation of love is all that Elizabeth needs and she throws herself into Kaitla's arms. She catches her, her heart breaking violent tremors coursing through the smaller girl's body.
"He-he-he hurt me. He threw me against a wall. He took my clothes off and did horrible things to me. He threatened me with a gun." She pauses to regain her breath before whispering the most terrifying part of the encounter. "He told me he would kill you."
"Honey it's okay. You're safe now. I won't let you go. I'm safe too. It's okay." Litzy's breathing begins to normalize as she clings to Kaitla for dear life.
"I love you." She whispers before passing out into an adrenaline-absence induced sleep.
"I love you too baby." Kaitla whispers back, leaning her best friend back until they're both lying on the bed, neither letting the other go.
Kaitla awakes to a shrill scream in her ear. She leaps out of the way as a thin arm flails towards her face. Her heart breaks as she peeks up from the side of the sofa bed. Sweat drenches Litzy's face, mouth wide open in an everlasting scream of pure terror, her limbs flailing as if trying to fight of something that's not there. Cautiously, Kaitla crawls towards her roomie, whispering comforting noises as she gently but firmly holds Elizabeth's limbs still.
"Honey, it's okay. You're here. I'll keep you safe. I won't let you go." The long haired, long legged beauty continues soothing her until Litzy finally stops screaming and regains consciousness. For the first time since the attack, she breaks into gut wrenching sobs, painful to hear from someone who never cries. Curling into Kaitla's arms, she stays there until the tears ebb. "You want to talk about it?" The smaller girl sits there, looking painfully childlike, before shaking her head no. Her best friend gives her a hug and simply waits. The two are close enough to know that nothing stays secret for long. Litzy hasn't told her because it's too painful, not because she doesn't trust her. The gorgeous protector takes her hand and knows just what she needs. Time. And coffee. Always coffee. "Come on. I'll make some coffee. What would you like for breakfast?" The two step into the light and the shadows beneath Litzy's expressive eyes become clear. She blinks, comprehending the question, then shakes her head before releasing Kaitla's hand and heading to the coffee maker. She replaces the filter and begins the coffee as if on autopilot. Emotionless, she walks to the cabinet and pulls out an orange pill bottle. Kaitla sighs as she watches her shake four little white pills into her hand. The younger, though taller, roomie crosses the room to her shorter counterpart and gently takes three of the pills from her hand and puts them back in the bottle. "No, honey, you're only supposed to take one." Litzy looks at her, her eyes full of broken innocence. Reluctantly, she allows Kaitla to take away the extra pills. The coffee finishes and she swallows the pill dry before reaching for the cabinet to get them mugs. Kaitla doesn't miss the quiver in Litzy's hands and gently takes them between her own. "I'll get it, love. You sit down. It's gonna be okay." Litzy obediently takes a seat the deep red kitchen table, motionless as she watches Kaitla gracefully move around the kitchen. After a few minutes, the tall beauty joins her at the kitchen table, setting a cup of coffee in front of her. Litzy nods her head and mouths thank you, but no sound comes out. "What do you want for breakfast?" Once again, Litzy shakes her head. Kaitla sighs, not wishing to press the issue. She grabs an apple for herself and sits back down. "Do you want me to call and have them cancel your performance tonight?" Litzy vigorously shakes her head no. Performing is what gives her life. Mid-shake, a thought crosses her mind and her head stills. She instead shrugs. "Do you want me to walk with you?" Litzy nods her head cautiously. "Do you want me to see if James will walk with us?" Litzy nods her head more certainly now, confident in their friends' strength and protectiveness. "Do you want me to tell him what happened?" The shame in her best friend's eye is enough to tell Kaitla the answer to that question is definitely no. "It's okay honey. I won't tell anyone. It's okay." She reaches across the table and takes Litzy's hand. "I love you." A squeeze in return is enough for Kaitla.
A few hours later the girls prepare to leave for the theatre where they'll be performing tonight. "Come on babe. Let's have lunch." Litzy shrugs, still silent. "At least an apple?" The minimum meal limit the pair agreed on when they first moved in together. She looks up at Kaitla through tired eyes, then realizes she has no choice. She grabs an apple and stands by the door. "Honey, I know if you don't eat it here you won't eat it at all." The smaller girl sighs, looks at her best friend, looks at the apple, then takes a small bite. Her dead eyes stare at Kaitla as if to ask, 'there, are you happy now?' as she's vocalized so many times in the past. The lengthy beauty crosses the room and takes the other girl in her arms, Litzy's petite frame feeling more fragile than ever before. "Let's go. James is downstairs waiting." The two make their way down the flights of stairs in their apartment building.
"Hey beautifuls! Thanks for giving me a call! What a nice surprise!" James jovial attitude sombers as he sees Litzy. To many people she appears strong, but James can read her like an open book. A concern glance towards Kaitla, who's walking slightly behind her friend. She shakes her head, an unspoken promise to explain later. How she'll explain without breaking her promise to Litzy is she doesn't know yet, but she does know the last thing that needs to happen today is for James to push Litzy for answers.
"Thanks James. We really appreciate it. How are Idina and Jackie doing?" The mention of his wife and daughter light up James' face.
"Great. Tonight is mommy-daughter date night." Kaitla continues the conversation with the man old enough to nearly be their father all the way to the theatre. As they reach the door she turns to face Elizabeth, lifting the older girl's chin to meet her eyes.
"Are you ready for this?" Litzy nods. The trio walks into the theatre, James heading to the audience, Kaitla heading to the dressing room, and Litzy heading to the warm up area. As soon as Litzy is out of her sight, Kaitla changes directions to follow her. For the first time this day, sounds erupt from Litzy in a beautiful, heartbreaking melody. Dissonant chords resonate through the halls, still ringing with passion when the source has stopped. Litzy exits the room and passes Kaitla, giving her a small nod and a twitch towards a smile as she heads to the dressing room. Half hour to show time.
A week and a half later, Litzy speaks her first word outside of performance since the night of the attack. Kaitla holds her long hair back from her face with one hand, rubbing the girl's small back with the other as she empties the contents of her stomach into the toilet after returning home from a performance.
"I'm so sorry." The horror still remains in Litzy's eyes when she first wakes up, but not as time is beginning to heal.
"Honey, why are you sorry? You're absolutely fine. I love you." Litzy opens her mouth to respond but quickly redirects her path as she vomits yet again. Her face is white and pasty, exhausted from lack of sleep and food, on top of whatever is wreaking havoc inside of her.
"I'm sorry you had to take care of me. I'm sorry for not speaking. I was just so….scared."
"Honey, it's okay. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. The most important thing is getting you better."
"I think I'm done throwing up….at least for now." The smaller girl tries to stand on her own and nearly falls. Kaitla rushes to hold her up, but Litzy is determined to stand on her own. "I'm okay, bae. I can walk." Kaitla settles for holding her hand as they head to the living room. Litzy collapses onto the sofa bed, currently set up into a couch, completely exhausted from the short walk.
"Honey, please eat something. You're scaring me."
"In a bit? My stomach is still churning."
"Litz, you never get sick. What's going on?"
"I wish I knew." She pauses, dread filling her eyes. "I wonder…"
"You wonder what?"
"I'll be back." The smaller girl gets up and returns to the bathroom. Much to Kaitla's dismay, she shuts the door firmly behind her. A few minutes later, a squeak of a voice stops Kaitla mid-pace. "Um, hey Kat? Will you come here?" Kaitla opens the bathroom door to see her roomie staring shell shocked at something in her hand, swaying on the spot. A positive pregnancy test.
"Come on, Litz. Let's go sit down. Can't have you falling on me. Especially now." The two, well, three, make their way back to the couch, Litzy's eyes wide with fear.
"What am I gonna do? I swore I'd never have kids! I'd be a horrible mother!"
"No, what you're going to be is an amazing mother. You meet every challenge you face with passion and determination. Why should this be any different?"
"I'm too screwed up inside! How can I handle a child if I can't even handle myself half the time?"
"Elizabeth. Calm down. It'll be okay. We can get through this together. I won't leave you. If you want, we can find the guy. If you want to try and forget about it forever, we don't have to. If you want, when you get too big to hide, you can stop doing shows and focus on the shop. You don't have to decide anything tonight. You've got nearly nine months ahead of you! Just don't give up now, baby. Now you'd be giving up for two people I love with all my heart." They lay back on the sofa, Litzy's back up against Kaitla's chest, one arm clinging to Kaitla's beneath her head, the other protectively wrapped across her still flat stomach. Kaitla's free arm covers Litzy's as she inwardly vows never to let anything else happen to her best friend, or the small child now growing inside of her.
"I'm so tired." Litzy's voice comes out in a soft whisper, weary, exhausted, broken. Kaitla strokes her hair.
"It's okay baby. Go to sleep. I'm right here. You're safe." Their thin frames press against each other, finding safety in the closeness between them. At last, they fall asleep.
Kaitla awakes to a cold sofa bed. Litzy didn't wake up screaming. That's new. But where did she go? Kaitla rolls out of bed and heads to where she always used to find her roomie when she couldn't sleep. The creativity room. Neither girl could sleep well in a bedroom, so the bedroom of their apartment became a room where they could create anything and everything they could imagine and figure out. Sewing materials, wood, spare parts, paint, various notepads and pencils litter the room. Sure enough, Kaitla finds the small mother-to-be amongst a pile of pillows and blankets in the creativity room. In her hand is a notepad filled with writing and scratching outs and bulleted lists and side notes.
"I figured it out." Litzy's soft voice breaks the early morning silence.
"Yeah?" Kaitla takes a seat next to her and Litzy scooches to share the blankets.
"Yeah. I'm gonna keep performing for about three to four months, until the baby becomes real noticeable. You'll be taking over more of the performances, as we still have seven months left on the contract. In the mean while, I'll be working on the shop more to have a secure and stable place for both of us once the performances are done. That's what we did before we got this opportunity to perform; it's what we'll do again. It'll be enough, and busy season is coming so it'll be plenty. I want this guy found so he never hurts a girl again, but I don't want to be involved. I don't want to know any more about him than I already do. Not his name, nothing. I know if he becomes more than this nameless, mostly faceless creature, I'll blame him forever, and I don't want to blame the baby. I want to love this baby with all my heart. And I don't want to find a man to cover up anything. I'm perfectly happy the way we are. Two best friends. We have something better than romance and sex. We have a love that will last forever." Litzy looks up from her notepad to find Kaitla watching her, tears in her eyes.
"I love you, bae. You're the best thing that ever happened to me." Kaitla leans over and kisses Litzy's forehead.
"Nope. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you, too." The two sit there, foreheads together for a while, until Litzy suddenly jumps up and sprints to the bathroom. She barely makes it in time before she hurls into the toilet. Kaitla isn't far behind, once again comforting her best friend as she empties everything in her stomach, dry heaving when there's nothing left. "I swear, if this ever happens to you I'll take care of you too. I'm sor—" Kaitla rubs her back, sympathizing for her.
"Don't be sorry, honey. But I am thinking maybe I'll just end up with a girl and avoid this whole thing."
"Yeah, we all thought I was gonna die a virgin but look how that worked out." Litzy's sarcasm is punctuated by even more dry heaving, then she seems to be through.
"Do you want to lie down for a while?" Kaitla asks as she helps Litzy stand. The shorter of the pair shakes her head no as she rinses her mouth with water from the sink.
"No thanks. I'll be okay. I gotta get used to it sometime. No time like the present." Kaitla stands with her jaw dropped as Litzy takes off into the other room, factual, logical, and never stopping moving.
"Honey, the contents of your entire stomach were just flushed into the apartment sewage system and you're white as a ghost. Do you really think this is a good idea?" Kaitla enters the kitchen to see Litzy standing by the coffee maker, hand on her lower abdomen, partially from nausea and partially still getting used to the idea of there being another life in there. "Oh come on, Litzy, that kid is gonna end up addicted to coffee before it's even born!"
"Just think of it this way: at least it's not heroin." Kaitla rolls her eyes at Litzy's sass as she joins her in making their morning coffee.
"Fine. But more than an apple for breakfast. You haven't been hardly eating lately and now you're eating for two."
"Not for breakfast, bae. It'll just follow everything else down the sewers. It'll settle down by afternoon. I'll eat more then."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
"Are you sure this isn't too tight?" Litzy examines herself in the mirror of the dressing room, dreading her last performance.
"You look beautiful as always, Litz."
"I don't want it to end." The shorter brunette wraps her arms around her growing stomach, leaning back into the arms of her best friend.
"I know, honey. Me either. But think, you've got a new song for the line up tonight."
"Yes. It's the closing song."
"It'll be okay, hon. You've thought about this and you've planned and you've prepared and you've done so, so well. The shop's up and ready. The audience always loves you." Kaitla's pep talk is cut short by an interruption from her blushing roomie.
"They love you more. Just like I love you more."
"Impossible."
"I've always loved you more. Now come on, it's about time to start." Kaitla rolls her eyes at her still petite best friend. Kaitla was thinner than her now, which she was very glad for. Both girls were delicately built, but at the beginning of her pregnancy, Litzy had been unhealthily thin. Now, four months later, Elizabeth is back to healthy and just beginning to show a baby bump. Sweatshirts and other baggy clothing conceal it fairly well, but in their performance dresses, you can only go so far. The pair enter the stage, grinning and waving at the audience. If there was one thing Litzy never lost through this entire experience, it was her ability to perform onstage. The set list flies by and soon it's time for Litzy's closing number. She motions to the band that she would like to say something before the final song.
"This next one I have never sang for you guys before. It's originally sung by one of my dear friends, Idina Menzel-Snyder. I don't know if you've ever hear of it; it's called Child. I thought it would be a very appropriate song to sing for you all tonight because," Litzy pauses to swallow back tears. She blinks once and maintains her composure. "Because tonight is the last night I will be performing for you guys. I have something more important to take care of now. In about five months, there'll be another addition to our makeshift family. And honestly, it's getting kind of hard to hide a baby bump in a performance dress." The audience chuckles nervously at the singer's attempt at humor. The good girl? Pregnant out of wedlock? Or even outside of a relationship? "But in all seriousness, guys, I'm gonna miss you all, but being the best mom I can be is my number one priority now." She nods to the band as she blinks tears out of her eyes and begins to sing. "Child….teach me everything you know…."
"Litz, you're gonna be late!"
"It won't—freaking—fit!" Kaitla moves aside the curtain and joins her best friend in the curtained corner of the living room designed for storing clothes and getting dressed.
"Honey….can we chose something else? I don't think this is gonna work…" Litzy's shoulders slump as she stops fighting the top, one hand settling on her distinctive bump.
"Ugh. I'm so fat. Nothing fits anymore." Outgrowing clothes had long been a problem for Elizabeth's self image, but pregnancy gives you no choice.
"Hold on." Kat disappears outside the curtain and leaves Litzy standing there, hugging her swollen abdomen protectively. She returns shortly, holding onto a wadded red piece of fabric. "Here." She unwads the fabric, revealing a shirt. "It has an elastic back. I figured there'd be a day when you'd come to need it. I finished it a few weeks ago." Litzy takes the shirt, hugging her best friend and blinking back tears.
"Frick, these stupid hormones." This elicits a chuckle from Kaitla. "What would I do without you bae?"
"You'd still be trying to get that shirt on. Here. I'll help you." Dressing around each other has long since stopped being a problem, reoccurring only briefly when Litzy first began to show. "Hon, you have to move your arm if you want to change." Litzy reluctantly lifts her arm from its protective position around her child. In no time flat, both girls are ready to go, though in opposite directions. "I love you, okay?"
"'Kay. I love you too." The girls kiss cheeks as they take off opposite ways down the street in front of the apartment building. Kat heads to the theatre still, while Litzy heads to the shop. On an ordinary day Litzy would be at the shop at the crack of dawn, but today is their tenth anniversary of being friends. A delightful breakfast and extra time spent together before heading off. The cool fall breeze blows gently through Litzy's waist-long brunette hair. She feels her baby kick, both inside her and by her arm permanently protecting her baby. For a short distance she walks with her eyes closed, enjoying the feel and smell of fall. She opens her eyes to see another pair of orbs she never thought she'd make eye contact with again. The two grown young women, from far in each others' pasts, pass each other on the busy New York City sidewalk. Litzy picks up her pace, struggling for normal breath as she reaches the shop door. Her hand fumbles to fit the keys in the lock, one arm clinging to her growing and now obvious child for dear life. She throws open the door to the shop and inhales deeply. Her systems relax as she takes in the sweet scent of fall mums, the delectable scent of the cupcakes and other baked goods she had prepared yesterday in advance. She probably didn't even recognize you. Oh, who am I kidding? We'd recognize each other anywhere. A series of memories flash through Litzy's mind like an old camera reel. The laughter, the fun times, the strength off each other. Then the pain, the rejection, the brokenness, the shame. The loneliness. Litzy comes to on the floor of the shop, sitting against the cool wall. I hope I didn't fall here. She looks down at her hand across her swollen abdomen. Oh baby I hope I didn't hurt you. Please be okay. She slowly works to a standing position, not the easiest thing at seven months pregnant. She flips the sign to open and draws back the blinds. Customers begin to flood in and Litzy assumes her composed shopkeeper character. Not often does she hide behind a character, but today stresses her enough that she does. The day passes and eventually the shop closes. Litzy cleans the shop and James arrives to walk her home at just the perfect time. Litzy has grown to feel as close to safe as she can over the past few months, and James has played a huge part in that. After letting herself into the apartment and James goes on, Litzy pulls out her phone to let Kaitla know she's home safe before she arrives from the theatre an hour later. What she doesn't expect is what she finds however. A text from the flash from the past. "Olivia: Hey! Congrats! I didn't know you were married. Who's the lucky man?" Litzy sighs. Great. Here we go again. But then again maybe she's changed. Maybe I've changed. Litzy takes a deep breath before texting back. "I'm not married." Three words are all she has the courage to say to the girl. She ponders on texting her more as she types out a message to Kaitla. Just as the message sends, her phone explodes with messages from Olivia. She manages to read the first few before her vision becomes too blurred with tears to catch anything but phrases. Stupid. Revolting. Horrid. Worthless. Reckless. Slut. Idiot. Good for nothing.
Kaitla comes home to find Litzy passed out on the sofa bed, phone in one hand and a blade in the other, reminding Kaitla that it is possible to cry in your sleep. The black camisole stretches over her swollen abdomen, one strap dangling off a delicate shoulder. Kaitla gently tugs the blade and phone from her friend's hands before lifting the arm Litzy has protectively across her stomach. She nearly gasps at what she sees. Even unconscious, Litzy tugs her arm back to protecting her unborn child, freshly healing wounds resting on dried spots of blood on the camisole. Kaitla fetches the bandages from the bathroom along with a wet washcloth. She returns to her broken roomie and begins cleaning her wounds. Litzy whimpers and awakes.
"I'm sorry." Kaitla nearly misses the saddened whisper. It's been so long since Litzy's last relapse. Longer than Kaitla even. Far before the baby.
"Honey…why?" Thoughts tumble around Litzy's mind as she contemplates how to respond. Her eyes drift to her phone and remain there. Kaitla catches the drift and picks up the phone as she finishes with Litzy's damaged arm. Litzy returns her arm to protecting her baby, drawing her knees up as far towards her chest as they will go. Kaitla's eyes widen and harden as she reads the messages.
"Honey, she didn't know. She didn't know what really happened. And she never knew how strong you really are. I know it's hard, but please don't let her get to you. We have all we need. We have each other. And now we have this little miracle." Kaitla gently rests her hand on the side of Elizabeth's swollen abdomen, the only one besides the mother herself who can.
"Why can't everyone see like you? However this life was created, it's a miracle just like any other." Kaitla knows the older girl's question is rhetorical. She feels something beneath her hand and a smile lights up her face.
"Is that the baby kicking?" Litzy chuckles in response with a nod.
"Yes, that would be our little miracle playing jungle gym on my insides. If you think it's cute, try having it on your ribs and bladder. The two girls laugh as they lay the sofa back into a bed. Gathering the blankets, the crawl into bed, using their body heat to warm each other against the cool fall night. Like so many other nights, they fall asleep with Litzy's back into Kaitla's chest, Kaitla's arm draped over Litzy's around the baby, their fingers intertwined. They feel safe knowing the other is safe. Tears still stain Litzy's face, but for the first time in a very long time, as slight smile is there as well as she drifts off to sleep.
"Litz, don't you think you should start staying home soon?" Kaitla watches her best friend prepare to leave for work. Had she not been pregnant, she'd have been joining Kaitla at her audition today.
"I'll be fine. It's just the shop. Besides, us two OCD people have everything ready a month before the baby's even due. You go and rock that audition and don't worry about me." Litzy emphasizes the last four words as she grins at her roomie.
"Fine. But only if you swear to let me know if you need anything. A-ny-thing!" The playful banter goes back and forth to lessen the tension of Kaitla's worry and Litzy's need for freedom.
"I will. I love you."
"Love you too."
"Love you more." And with that she's out the door. Kaitla sighs and thinks about her roomie. Fiercely determined, sometimes too much so. But no time to dwell on it. And not to mention she promised Litzy she wouldn't. Kaitla's wondrous voice fills the small apartment as she begins to warm up for her audition, lost in the music.
Litzy sets the bag of cupcakes down in front of the next customer, glad the day is almost over. She knows the life inside her is a miracle, but currently this miracle as been wreaking havoc on her insides. Not to mention, her back and head have been killing her all day. Finally, the clock turns and the last customers make their way to the check out and then the door. She finishes cleaning early and collapses in a chair by the window to wait for James, rubbing her abdomen to try to ease the ache and discomfort. A relieved smile crosses her face as James and Idina walk into view, hand in hand. Litzy rises and exits the shop, locking the door behind her.
"It's great to see you, Idina! It's been so long!" The petite but very pregnant shopkeeper rushes to her friend and embraces her in an excited hug.
"What? I come every day and I've never gotten that kind of greeting!" James fakes offense at the enthusiastic greeting his wife gets.
"Oh, hush, James. Don't be jealous because Elizabeth likes me more than you." The recently-returned-to-dark-hair-ed beauty play smacks her husband on the arm, then proceeding to feel his muscular bicep.
"Yeah, everybody likes you better than me. Even I like you better than me."
"Oh well isn't that touching? Don't worry baby, I've always loved you more than I've loved me." The couple begin draw near to each other and their lips collide in fiery passion. Litzy is content to watch the exchange of true love, if a bit unsanitary, for a short while before a sharp twinge in her stomach causes her to gasp, unintentionally drawing their attention.
"Honey, you okay?" Idina moves from her husband to rest a hand on the young woman's shoulder.
"I'm fine. The baby's just been a bit, active, today." She rubs her stomach as they begin the journey back to the apartment. A few blocks from their apartment building, Litzy feels the sharp twinge again, this time strong enough to stop her in her tracks , bending slightly, both arms now curled around her stomach.
"Litz, what's wrong?" Concern is written clear across James' face, but Idina has the situation under control.
"Come on, sweetie. Let's get back to the apartment before they get too painful to walk. Kaitla's back at the apartment already. That is where you were planning to give birth, correct?" Litzy stares wide eyed at Idina, shocked by the woman in front of her.
"Yes, that's where we'd planned. How do you know Kat's home?"
"Did you really think I didn't catch what was going on back right outside the shop? I've been there twice honey. I texted Kaitla under the premise of seeing if we could stop by. Don't worry, she doesn't know. Otherwise she'd be halfway here by now. Litzy nods in agreement.
"Wait, wait, wait….she's in labor?!"
"Yes James, get with the program. I'm sure she appreciates you informing the entire neighborhood as well."
"Um, actually, I would appreciate getting home reasonably soon." Litzy adds as another the contraction seizes her abdomen.
"We're almost there. And walking really helps speed things up. You'll enjoy that later."
"Well I've been walking all day and the contractions are definitely starting to become painful."
"Yes, that happens." The trio walks up the apartment stairs, only stopping once to let Litzy breathe through a contraction. They knock on the door and hear Kaitla's voice from behind it drawing nearer.
"Litzy, you have a key." She opens the door just after another contraction sends Litzy bent in half, eyes squeezed shut in fear and concentration. Idina rubs her back as James' stands the to the side awkwardly.
"She's, um, a bit preoccupied."
"Oh, James, I'm fine." Litzy says as she returns to a standing position, one arm, as always, protectively across the child she'll be meeting quite soon. "Kat, it's time."
"Oh frickin frick nuggets. The time?"
"Yes, the time. Can we please come in?"
"Yes, yeah, yes. Sorry." She steps back from the door, allowing them to enter.
"You're fine, bae. Those just, um, aren't fun? They're not bad yet but definitely noticeable and decently painful." Kaitla bustles around the house, leading them to the creativity room where they'd planned for Litzy to give birth. What better room to do it than in the room designed for a birth of creativity? Litzy changes into an oversized tshirt and a pair of men's boxers. She's come to find they make great sleep shorts, and not to mention the elastic waistband. She meets them in the creativity room as another contraction leaves her leaning against the door frame before sinking to the floor, curled in a ball.
"How far apart, Litz?"
"Fourteen minutes." She smiles at James, self-designated time keeper, hiding behind a notepad and pen in the furthest corner of the room. Litz paces, both from anxiety and to be walking inside, out of the cool winter chill. The next contraction comes early, ten minutes, and the intensity leaves Kaitla holding her best friend up as her knees give out. She steadies Litz back on two feet before leaning back and looking her in the eye.
"Are you okay?" Litzy nods, terrified.
"That one was strong."
"I figured so, honey." Litzy nods again and goes to begin pacing again but is prevented but Kaitla's thin but strong arms. "Hey. I know you're scared. I know you're terrified out of your wits. I know you're unsure what will happen. But it will be okay. You'll do beautifully bae, like you always do." She lifts Litzy's chin to meet her eyes. Fear and love shine clear from Litzy's eyes. "Shall we dance?" Dancing with Kaitla will produce the same effect on her labor, while reducing the stress as opposed to the way the pacing was adding to it. Idina stands back and watches. There for assistance, but staying silent and out of the way if not needed. She smiles as the two friends hand the situation with ease and grace in the face of something terrifying. Litzy turns her back into Kaitla's chest and they both wrap their arms around Litzy's abdomen, swaying to music only the two of them can hear. Nine minutes later, Litzy's knees buckle from fear, exhaustion, and another contraction. Kaitla lowers her gently to the floor where she turns on her side, arching her back in response to the pain. The contraction ends and she lays there, limp and panting.
"I'm ready to have this baby."
"I know, baby. Your baby will be here before you know it."
"Our baby." She squeezes out before another contraction draws her knees up to her chest. A full forty five seconds later, she inhales deeply again. "Seven minutes, James. Give Kat the notepad please. I'm going to shower before this whole mess gets starts." James gladly hands off the notepad and pen, and Katya and Litzy head hand in hand to the bathroom down the hall. James rises to stand by his beautiful wife.
"So what do you think she's gonna do with that arm when the baby's born?" Idina smacks James' chest. The idiocity of men.
"She's scared, honey. She wants to protect this baby as best as she can. That comes out in her arm draped protectively across her stomach all the time." Idina's calm explanatory tone changes then as she gets on James for not using common sense. "And what do you think she's gonna do with that arm? She's gonna use it to hold a real baby!" Idina rolls her eyes at James and he just shrugs.
The last article of Litzy's clothing comes flying over the shower rod and the water turns on. She washes her hair, then removes the showerhead to wash her body, finishing and remaining on her swollen abdomen.
"That feels…I don't know if they're good. I mean natural childbirth is kind of hard, but they're not as overwhelmingly painful. Five minutes now." The water helps her to ride out the contraction as well as the shower providing some privacy before soon to be no privacy.
"How did you know that? I'm the one watching the clock."
"There are some things a mother just knows. Can I get out?" Kaitla shakes her head in wonder at her best friend as she hands a towel over the shower rod.
"I'll be right outside in the hall. Yell if you need anything." The lithe beauty slips out the door and shut it firmly behind her. Litzy kneels in the shower, breathing though another contraction, this one the most painful yet. The contraction peaks and Litzy hears a pop, accompanied by fluid rushing out of her nether regions. The contraction ebbs and she sighs. Well, at least things will get moving now. No need to put her shorts back on. She throws the tshirt on and quickly heads back to the creativity room before the next contraction hits. She barely makes it. Sitting on the makeshift (but disposable) bed, she arches her back and clenches her teeth to refrain from screaming. The extra foam padding from their sofa bed on top of an old shower curtain and covered with old towels provides a perfectly suitable place for their miracle to be born, each piece of it holding a fond memory.
"Three minutes apart. A minute and a half long." She gasps out after another contraction. Kaitla, wide eyed and terrified, looks to Idina for advice.
"She'll know when she's ready. Any time now."
"Whenever you feel ready, love, push."
"Oh gosh, no. I'm not rea—" Her words are cut off but an angonizing groan. "I want her out of me! Now!" She shouts as she begins to push.
"Easy, baby, that does it. Not too fast."
"This hurts like frickin crap! Do you think too fast is a problem?" She bites out between pushes.
"That's it love! I see it head! You're doing it honey!" Litzy arches her back, her neck thrown back, tendons standing out, as she strains with all her might. She breathes and bears down again. The head pops out and Kaitla wipes off the baby's face. She winces in pain, both from Litzy's death grip on her hand and also in sympathy as she sees the baby's shoulders press against the inside of the opening. Litzy shrieks in pain as she pushes again, and finally the shoulders are out. "One last push honey! Then you're there!" Litzy draws in a deep breath and bears down for one final push. All at once, the pressure releases and she falls back limp on the bed. Almost immediately she sits back up, removing her tshirt. Kaitla hands the baby to her and she lays back with her child upon her bare chest. "December 3nd, 1:02am. A baby girl."
"Eleanora. Ellie for short." She makes eye contact with her best friend at the foot of her bed. Kaitla's eyes fill with tears.
"For me?"
"Of course after you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me." Kaitla leans on the bed next to Litzy, one of her arms providing a pillow, her free hand resting upon little Eleanora. Litzy draws in a breath and begins to sing. "And I, I will catch you when you fall. And I, I will be there when you call." Kaitla smiles and joins with her best friend, serenading her almost daughter. "You walk away, where you go, I will follow. And I, won't be alone. And a child will lead, yes a child will lead me home."