Thank you to everyone who gave this story a try, I know the subject matter is a little dark, I've tried to sprinkle levity throughout the chapters and some humor. I never write an unhappy ending,and I promise this is going somewhere really good. xxxxxxxxKrissy
After the first dose, Daryl wasn't very sick; he felt almost like he had the minor flu and the symptoms were manageable. Merle was right there insisting he eat everything Andrea cooked and they had a very nice Thanksgiving dinner. Life was ok, and they were grateful for it.
It would be one day at a time from now on, and they knew that there might be some bad days ahead, but they would face it together, and Merle would never let him give up or know just how scared he was.
Merle was terrified and had been since that phone call in September. But he never let Daryl know it and always acted like everything was perfectly normal.
He loved his brother so much, and it was time to be the strong one.
He knew that Daryl could beat it, but he also knew that years from now it could show up again as it did with their grandma Jean, but that was a worry for another day.
At the AA meetings Merle went to now, they said, "One day at a time." And "Keep it simple." And Merle intended to do just that, for the rest of his life and Daryl's if need be.
The second dose was a dress down day at the hospital, the Friday after Thanksgiving, and Daryl smiled when he saw her that day. Allie had on an Incubus T-shirt and a pair of black scrub pants that fit her shape perfectly. She looked like she was going to a rock show and not at work.
His first impression of her had been off a little; this had surprised him. He wanted to get to know more about her, but it didn't mean anything, he was just passing the time and she was there.
Merle was aware that Daryl was staring at her ass as she bent down to retrieve her pen from the floor, they both watched as she carefully cleaned the pen with alcohol gel and then washed her hands.
His brother wasn't dead after all it seemed, and this was the best thing Merle had seen in months, maybe years because Daryl did not take after him in the woman department.
He'd been burned once and never seemed the same after, never had been interested in women at all after that.
Merle guessed that Chelsey had broken his heart although Daryl never let on to that.
But Daryl looked at this girl like she was a cheeseburger he wanted to devour, and Merle smiled as he watched his brother keep an eye on her like it was his job.
"Incubus, huh?" Merle said when she approached them, "Seen them about ten years ago, right Daryl?"
"Me too," Allie said, "A few times. You guys ready?"
Daryl nodded, and as she led then to what was now his spot on Friday morning, he was sure he heard her humming "Love Hurts."
Love hurts, but sometimes it's a goodhurt,and it feels like I'm alive, love sings,and it transcends the bad things, have a heart and try me cause without loveI won'tsurvive.
"Good song," Daryl said, and she smiled as he sat down and she sat in the chair opposite them, as she usually did.
"I like it," She smiled again, and Merle noticed a little blush in her cheeks. "So, any problems this week?" She asked Daryl.
"Just a little sick to my stomach." He replied.
"Any vomiting?"
Daryl shook his head, "Dry heaves a little."
"Ok, I'll get you some Compazine for that, it's an anti-nausea medicine, in case you need it," Allie replied.
"He ain't sleeping right, and he's losing weight," Merle piped up, and Daryl looked over at him, "What, it's the truth. You got to tell her the truth, or she can't help you, brother."
"That's all normal; we can give you something to help sleep."
"No, I don't want it." Daryl said quickly, "I don't want to feel all hung over all the time."
"Come on Daryl; you got to…" Mere started but didn't get to finish.
"I'm afraid this is his rodeo Merle," Allie spoke up, "His body, his illness, his choice."
Merle listened intently to her words and the way she advocated for his brother, her patient. He couldn't help but admire her as she explained things to Daryl, different foods he could eat to keep nausea away and herbal teas he could get to help him sleep.
She knew her stuff that was for sure. It took a lot to impress Merle Dixon, and she had done that time and time again already.
After they finished talking Allison stood up to get the IV bags and wrote down a few suggestions on a notepad and handed it to Daryl who put it in his shirt pocket.
"Hey Allie," Merle said, "Can I ask you a question?"
"Shoot," Allie said with a smile.
"This medication you're giving him and the radiation, will it affect, ya know, like his sperm count or anything?"
"Jesus Christ Merle!" Daryl hissed.
"No," She said trying to hide a grin, "You can still be an uncle one day."
"I'm sorry about him Miss, he ain't got no class," Daryl said, as his face heated up more, Merle was something else sometimes.
"No worries," She replied, "It's a valid question and a lot of people are too embarrassed to ask, don't give it another thought."
Daryl seemed satisfied with her answer, but he still gave Merle a dirty look. Leave it to Merle to bring up an uncomfortable subject. Even though he was glad to know there wouldn't be lasting effects after this was over.
Allie busied herself checking his PICC line and when she was satisfied she faced Daryl and explained that she was checking for signs of infection and there weren't any. Then she told him what to look for at home and what to do if he saw redness or swelling around the catheter that went into his left arm.
She had successfully distracted him from the previous conversation and put him at ease, that was her job, and she did it well.
"I'll be right back with your IV's Mr. Dixon," Allie said and turned to go.
"Hey, Allie," He said, and she turned back to face them, "Call me Daryl, ok?"
Her green eyes lit up, and she smiled at him, Merle smiled as he watched the exchange between the two of them, it was like he wasn't even there now. Noted and then she was gone.
"What?" Daryl said as he saw Merle snickering at him, "Might as well be on a first name basis since you brought my dick into the conversation."
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Later, when the IV was half infused Allison stopped by and checked on them, Merle had brought a book to read, and she looked at the title, 'To Kill a Mocking Bird.' It was her favorite book of all time.
"Did you see the movie, Merle?" She asked, and Merle looked up from the book.
"I watch it every time it's on TV, darlin." He said to her.
"Me too." She replied. "How about you Daryl, you like it?"
"Not so much," He replied.
"What do you like?" She asked.
Daryl shrugged, but Merle piped up right away.
"He's seen Lord of the Rings a million times, and he likes Star Trek."
"Oh my Dad loved Star Trek I've seen the show and the movies lots of times," She said, and then one of the other patients had paged her, and her phone beeped in her pocket, "I'll be back, LLAP." And then she was gone.
"LLAP?" Merle asked.
"Live long and prosper," Daryl replied.
"Seems you have a lot in common," Merle said not looking up from his book.
"Stop, Daryl said, "It ain't gonna happen."
"What ain't gonna happen?" Merle said with a grin.
"Whatever you're trying to cook up in that head of yours, just forget it, that girl is way outa my league, and I'm sure she ain't looking to be a nurse on her time off so just stop."
"That's a shame you feel that way, a girl who likes Incubus and Star Trek doesn't come along every day," Merle replied turning the page in his book.
"You're ridiculous." Daryl huffed.
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Andrea walked in the house with a bag of groceries and busied herself in the kitchen as she waited for Merle and Daryl to get back. She had a pot of soup on the stove by the time they got home, and they could smell it the minute they walked in.
Her job at Dale's grocery store had a lot of perks, and one of them was the hours, she was usually home by three every day and with bags of discounted groceries. Today she had gotten the herbal tea that Allie had recommended; Merle had called her from the hospital and asked her to get a few things.
"Hey, hey darling, looks like you got busy while we were gone," Merle said as he wrapped his arms around her waist as she stood at the stove cooking.
"Just some soup," She said, "I made a lot so we can freeze some, then we'll have it in case…"
"It's alright Andrea," Daryl said, "I know you're worried if I get sick."
She nodded and turned around to face them. "Chicken soup should be ok, right? If you feel sick?"
"It will be all right darlin," Merle answered.
"Thanks, Andrea," Daryl said and gave her a quick hug, "I appreciate it, I really do."
Later they sat around the table that night with bowls of soup and Merle filled her in on the goings on of the day.
"So, Daryl may have a lady friend." Merle said as he tasted the soup, "Great soup darlin." He said turning to Andrea, with a smile on his face a mile wide.
"A lady friend? Really? Do tell." Andrea said, "Thank you, honey," She said to Merle.
"He's dreamin," Daryl laughed, "It's the nurse that runs my IV, Merle thinks I should be throwing myself at her, seeing as I'm such a catch right now and all."
"Hey, you never know, could be something, could work out for ya." Merle said still eating his soup, "She's a smart one too."
"She ain't my type anyway," Daryl said, and Merle rolled his eyes at Andrea. "And this asshole practically asked her if my dick was still going to work after all this."
"And she said yes," Merle said, "And it's a fucking relief not to have to worry about that too, and you know it, so shut it."
"Just leave my dick out of any more conversations with her alright?" Daryl said, and Andrea couldn't suppress a smile, things were going to be ok. Dinner conversation still deteriorated quickly down crazy paths in this house, it wasn't about to change, and that was a relief to her.
"She ain't my type so so knock it off," Daryl said again as a reminder to Merle to back the fuck off.
"Please, I saw you looking at her all damn day, she is so your type." Merle said with a laugh and turned to Andrea, "She likes the same music as him and all that Star Trek stuff, just turn on that ole Dixon charm, it's like catnip to women, you know that."
"What planet are you living on brother?" Daryl laughed.
"The planet where I know what I saw today, your eyes followed that girl all day long."
"Don't mean nothin." Daryl said.
"You just keep tellin yourself that," Merle laughed.
Merle meant well, he really did, and both of them knew that, but Andrea watched as a look of sadness crossed Daryl's face. He was sick, there was no doubt about it, and maybe he didn't have that kind of feelings right now. There was so much to think of now and some things just needed to go on the back burner for now. She understood that, even if Merle didn't seem to, then she laughed again at Merle's catnip joke. She had surely been caught by the Dixon catnip that was for sure.
Daryl," Andrea asked, trying to change the subject, she could tell Daryl was uncomfortable, "How are you feeling so far?"
"So far, so good, but I'm tired now, I think I'll turn in for the night." He said getting up from the table and putting his bowl in the dishwasher. Merle looked at the clock on the wall; it was 6:45 pm and as he watched Daryl slowly make his way down the hall, his heart broke a little more.
"Night brother," Merle called after him.
"Night," He called back, "Thanks again Andrea."
When he got to his room Daryl climbed onto his bed and was asleep in minutes, the exhaustion had hit him half way through dinner, and he hadn't wanted to upset Merle. He slept most of the next day and then the next night he couldn't sleep at all.
He thought about her sometimes that week and wondered if she was having a good day. Just because his days weren't so good didn't mean he didn't want other people to be happy.
There were many sleepless nights that the first week.
It was starting, he could feel it. His body was too heavy now and the slightest things required so much effort.
He just wanted this to be over.