A/N: Thank you for continuing to read my story. I'm sorry I have made it unclear: Prue, Andy, and Cole are alive. In my other stories, I have clarified that Prue received amnesia because in my stories Leo has the power to revive for the first 1 minute after death due to his and Piper's marriage approval. Andy's alive because he was granted life after he risked his life to save the world. To have a full understanding, please read "One Big Happy Family." All the information intertwine though so any story should give you a profound understanding. On with the story, enjoy!
Day 2 of Mission: Moving
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
The girls ended up sleeping in the same room, too tired to move. The kids slept together and the guys didn't sleep at all.
Piper - while bringing in the food - Wake up, the guys have their food and now it's our turn. - calling - Egg Muffin? - Paige raises her hand and Piper hands it to her - Pancake deluxe? - Prue raises her hand and Piper hands it to her - Egg and Sausage Biscuit? - Phoebe raises her hand and Piper hands it to her - And last but not least, my Canadian ham, egg and cheese biscuit.
The girls eat first, considering the kids didn't even budge.
Paige - taking a sip of coffee - So, for breakfast it's fine, but no McDonalds for supper.
Piper - Paige, I'll eat anything but hamburgers, but it's harder to resist the urge when you're there.
Phoebe - taking a bite of her biscuit - Come on, give us the dish.
Piper - also taking a bite of biscuit - Nope.
Prue - taking a bite of her pancake - Piper!
Piper - Later. I think the kids and the guys will be asleep. I know they're not driving first.
Phoebe - taking a drink of orange juice - Why?
Piper - They've been up all night. They were watching a rental movie when I walked in.
Paige - What kind of movie?
Piper - The kind that only grown-ups watch.
Phoebe puts down her food and marches up to Richard and Paige's room.
Prue, Piper and Paige - Ut oh.
Paige - When Phoebe enters back in, it's my turn.
Piper - Go get him, girl. I've already got Leo.
Prue - Andy's next.
Phoebe walks in 10 minutes later and Paige leaves.
Piper - Is there anything left of Cole?
Phoebe - bashful - An ear.
Prue - Seriously!
Phoebe - No, 2 ears. No, he's all the way there; just his pride went for a walk.
Piper - I gave Leo a long lecture about Whitelighter status.
Prue - How'd he take it?
Piper - He said, - mocking Leo - "I fell from grace, remember?"
Phoebe - What did you do?
Piper - He's sleeping in the recliner.
Prue and Phoebe - Ouch.
Paige walks in with something in a McDonald's bag.
Prue - What's that?
Paige - Nothing.
Richard comes running in.
Richard - Please Paige, the guys put me up to it.
Paige - Did they, now?
Richard - Yes, they did.
Paige - If you tell me the truth, - she shakes the bag - you get these back. If not, - she takes a match and lights a candle - they burn.
Richard - We were just having some fun, nothing crossed our mind. So please, give me back my testicles!
Paige - calling - TESTICLES, BACK!
Richard - Thank you.
He walks out.
Paige - yelling after him - It happens again, and you'll never see those puppies again!
Richard - yelling back - Yes, ma'am!
Prue, Piper and Phoebe - Wow…
Prue - Nothing, huh.
Piper - Way to go, Paige.
Phoebe - You were the strictest. Holding on and not letting go!
Paige - Well, Prue, it was nothing, or… they were about to be at least. Piper, thank you. Phoebe, kinda.
Prue - My turn.
She walks off.
Richard and Paige's room
Prue walks into the room.
Prue - Boys, could you excuse us. - Leo, Cole and Richard walk out of the room and Prue shuts the door telekinetically -We need to talk, now!
Andy - Prue, let me explain.
Prue - I don't want to hear your explanations. Only your screams of agony and mercy.
Andy - God have mercy on my soul.
Prue - He may, but I won't.
Time Lapse
Prue comes walking into Piper's room, dusting off her hands.
Piper - So, how'd it go?
Prue - Beautiful.
Leo - Is there anything left to burry?
Prue - If you run quickly, the crows might not get his last eyeball. - the boys dash towards Paige and Richards room - They fell for it.
Piper - I fell for it! What happened?
Prue - I gripped at him, he tried to plead his case, and I didn't listen. You know, the usual.
Phoebe - Wow. I'll take it back. You were worse.
Prue - No, Andy kept his testicles. I'd be afraid of no more kids.
Paige - I was planning on him never seeing those puppies again.
Piper - I can't believe you orbed away his testicles.
Paige - I didn't. I orbed them to me, not away.
Piper - I hate to cut this short, but we need to go.
Phoebe - Could you at least tell us our next destination?
Piper - For sleep, lunch or supper. For what?
Phoebe - Sleep.
Prue - Lunch.
Paige - Supper.
Piper - We're sleeping at Evanston, having lunch at Elko, and supper will also be at Evanston.
Phoebe - Where is Evanston again?
Piper - On the outskirts of Salt Lake City, Utah.
Paige - I want to know where we will be eating. What restaurant?
Piper - Anything that is reachable but McDonald, Burger King, Dairy Queen or anything hamburger-ish.
Paige - Darn.
Prue - Ok, lets pack up and head out.
Phoebe - I'll go and get the guys.
Paige - Sarcastic - I have this strangest feeling we'll be driving.
Piper - Hey, get your own lines.
Phoebe leaves.
Paige - So, how are you feeling?
Piper - pulling out a map - Good.
Prue - Want some help?
Piper - Not a chance.
Paige - Come on, Piper. At least tell us the interstates we'll be traveling.
Piper - We'll be on I-80 east all day. We'll be driving 440 miles today.
Prue - At least tell us what interstates we'll be traveling this entire trip.
Piper - And let you follow with a map, no way. Find a better plan for executing.
Phoebe - entering - Hey, the guys are tired and ready for a nap.
Paige - Great. Lets get the kids ready for traveling. Get ready, get set, go!
They all do their things and head out.
Car #3
Phoebe - over the speakers; to Piper - Come on, Piper. Tell us what's up with you and hamburgers.
From Car #3, we can see Piper quickly glancing at Leo beside her, asleep.
Piper - over the speakers - On one condition.
Paige - in the phone - What?
Piper - over the speakers - You all tell me the truth. You promise not to tell anyone and not to laugh.
Phoebe, Prue, and Paige - over the speakers; in the phone - Promise.
Piper - over the speakers - Ok, are your men asleep?
Phoebe - over the speakers - Out cold.
Paige - in the phone - Like a log.
Prue - over the speakers - He's drifting in and out of consciousness, but he'll be out by the time we get to straight roads.
Piper - over the speakers; whispering, but loud enough - Oh no.
Paige - in the phone - What's that?
Piper - over the speakers - Nothing, it's just we're going to be in some very curvy roads in a few days.
Prue - over the speakers - He'll be wide-awake.
Piper - over the speakers - Well, its just… hamburgers make me a little boy crazy. I jump Leo every time.
Prue - over the speakers; trying to contain her laughter - I just never… never seen you as that kind.
Piper - over the speakers - Yeah, I don't know what it is. But every time I have a hamburger I jump Leo.
Phoebe - over the speakers; to Paige - Hey Paige, maybe we should have listened to him after all.
Paige - in the phone - Maybe… yeah. We should have. A lot more than we did.
Piper - over the speakers - Whom are you talking about?
Phoebe - over the speakers; a little hesitant - Chris…
Piper - over the speakers; sadly - Oh.
Paige - in the phone - I just can't stop thinking about him. Every since the day of his birth/death.
Prue - over the speakers - Huh?
Piper - over the speakers - Remember the guy I told you about: Chris. I did tell you he was our Chris, right?
Prue - over the speakers - Yes.
Piper - over the speakers - He died on his birthday, one year and 2 days ago.
Phoebe - over the speakers - I just can't believe it's been a year.
Paige - in the phone - I know. Me either.
Piper - over the speakers - Leo's been quite shaken up these last few days. Telling me he should have done something to prevent that.
Phoebe - over the speakers - Is he still having guilt trips?
Piper - over the speakers - Yeah, he's had them every night. They get stronger at night and they were at an all time high yesterday.
Paige - in the phone - I can't believe that. He seemed to get over that.
Piper - over the speakers - Seemed, but not succeeded.
Phoebe - over the speakers - So that was the big bad secret. They make you go guy crazy.
Piper - over the speaker - Yep, that's the reason.
Paige - in the phone - The personal reason.
Piper - over the speakers - Yes, that is personal.
Over the speakers and in the phone, the girls giggle a moment.
Piper - over the speakers - Ok, we've left Lovelock and we're heading towards Woolsey. 275 miles down, 395 to go today, 2,366 to go altogether.
Phoebe - over the speakers - Let's get this party started.
They drive about 16 miles and they stop in the small town of Rye Patch. They get some gas, stretch their legs, get the kids some juice and the guys some coffee.
Phoebe - passing out coffee - Ok, Leo; hot espresso. - she walks over to Car #4 - Andy, black coffee. - she walks over to Car #3 - Richard, cappuccino. - she walks over to her car - Cole; you wanted a coffee with little sugar and lots of milk?
Cole - Yes, ma'am.
Phoebe - Here you go. - she hands it to him and walks over to where Paige and Connor are watching the big rigs. - Hey.
Connor - Look Mommy, it's a blue one!
Paige - Yeah, baby. Do you want to get a closer look?
Connor clings to her.
Connor - No! It might eat us.
Connie was standing to Paige's left, by her foot. One of the big rigs fire up. Paige looks down to where Connie was just to find out she's not there.
Paige - Connie! Connie!
A trucker comes running out of the gas station, yelling.
Trucker - Hey, someone get that kid!
Paige looks up to her horror to see Connie in the drivers seat.
Paige - CONNIE!
Paige runs up to the truck.
Paige - a little nervous - Hey, Connie. Wanna show Mommy? - Connie shakes her head no - Come on, Mommy wants to see, too. - Connie shakes her head no again - Connie…
Trucker - Ma'am, I'm sorry to inform you, but that rig is carrying chemicals.
Paige - Oh, oh, oh! Connie, please. Connie Lea Bryant-Matthews-Montana, get down here now!
Connor - Connie, can I see?
Connie shrugs.
Paige - Connor!
Connor climbs up.
Trucker - What is my truck, a toy? Get those kids out of there!
Paige - Wait sir, I think I know what he's doing.
Trucker - I'm sure glad you do cause I don't.
Connor - Connie, can I sit in your set. - Connie moves to the left - No, no! We need to go and mommy's gonna be mad. - Connie shrugs again - Connie, please.
Connie moves out of the truck and swaggers over to Paige.
Connie - Sorry.
Paige picks her up. Connor walks over to them.
Paige - It's okay.
Piper walks out of the gas station.
Piper - What's going on?
The trucker leaves after he checks his rig.
Paige - Connie got bored, I guess, and decided to have a little fun by playing with a live sized real rig.
Piper - Ut oh. I was afraid of that. Children are very easily distracted. We couldn't keep them entertained for long with a little ride that is a long one.
Paige - So how do we capture their attention?
Phoebe - looking at attraction map - By going to the lake.
They turn to look at what she was talking about and smile.
Piper - We can't stay long, but we can go for a while. We'll just be turning in late. - Paige and Phoebe hi-five and Piper starts to think - Oh no, we can't.
Paige - Why?
Piper - There are several Air Force bases over that way. I want to get past them without stopping. Great Salt Lake is over that way so we can stop there.
Phoebe - How far is that?
Piper - About 100 miles.
Paige - Ok, but it better be fast.
Piper - It won't. But we will get through it.
They walk back to their cars, get everything settled in and start off again.
Time Lapse
Piper - over the speakers - Guys, follow me. We're taking 553 to Elko to eat.
Paige - in the phone - Roger that, good buddy.
Prue - over the speakers - You bored, Paige.
Paige - in the phone - Yeah, didn't you hear me singing a while back?
Phoebe - over the speakers - Yeah, and dogs for 500 feet howled.
Paige - in the phone - If I were there, I'd hit you.
Phoebe - over the speakers - But you're not, ha!
They pull off the interstate and up by 553.
Phoebe - over the speakers - You know, that reminds me of that song/movie.
Paige - in the phone - What song/movie?
Piper - over the speakers - Breaker, breaker. Come in. This here is the Duck.
Prue laughs.
Paige - in the phone - What in the world?
Prue - over the speakers - Convoy.
Paige - in the phone - That country movie?
Phoebe - over the speakers - That country movie? That movie rocked.
Piper - over the speakers - Especially the scene where the Duck's rig blew up.
Prue - over the speakers - Yeah, but thinking back it was kind of corny.
Paige - in the phone - I think you're all corny.
Phoebe - over the speakers - I think I have a couple trucking and traveling songs around here. - they hear ruffling - Ah ha! Got them!
Paige - in the phone - God help us.
Across the speakers comes Phoebe's 'Trucking Songs.' It's the CD itself, not Phoebe.
Uh, Breaker One-Nine, this here's the Rubber Duck. You got a copy on me Pig-Pen? C'mon. Uh, yeah 10-4 Pig Pen, fer sure, fer sure. By golly it's clean clear to Flag-Town, C'mon. Uh, yeah, that's a big 10-4 there, Pig-Pen, Yeah, we definitely got the front door good buddy, Mercy sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy...
Was
the dark of the moon, on the sixth of June
In a Kenworth, pullin'
logs
Cabover Pete with a reefer on
And a Jimmy haulin' hogs
We 'as headin' fer bear on I-One-Oh
'Bout a mile outta
Shaky-Town
I sez Pig-Pen, this here's the Rubber Duck
An' I'm
about to put the hammer on down
Cause
we gotta little ol' convoy, rockin' through the night
Yeah we
gotta little ol' convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on an'
join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna git in our way
We're gonna
roll this truckin' convoy, cross the USA
Convoy...
Uh,
breaker Pig-Pen, this here's The Duck
Convoy!
Uh, you wanna back off them hogs. 10-4, 'bout five mile or so, 10-roger. Them hogs is gittin' in-tense up here
By the time we got into Tulsa-Town
We had eighty-five
trucks in all
But they's a road block up on the clover leaf
An'
them bears 'as wall to wall
Yeah them smokies 'as thick as bugs
on a bumper
They even had a bear-in-the-air
I sez callin' all
trucks, this here's The Duck
We about to go a huntin' bear
Cause
we gotta great big convoy, rockin' through the night
Yeah we
gotta great big convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on an'
join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna git in our way
We're gonna
roll this truckin' convoy, cross the USA
Convoy...
Uh, you wanna give me a 10-9 on that Pig-Pen?
Convoy!
Uh,
negatory Pig-Pen, yer still too close. Yeah, them hogs is startin'
close up my sinuses. Mercy sakes, you better back off another
ten.
Well
we rolled up interstate fourty-four
Like a rocket sled on rails
We tore up all a our swindle sheets
An' left 'em settin' on
the scales
By the time we hit that Chi-Town
Them bears was a
gittin' smart
They'd brought up some reinforcements
From the
Illinois National Guard
There 'as armored cars, and tanks, and
Jeeps
An' rigs of every size
Yeah them chicken coops 'as full
a bears
An' choppers filled the skies
Well we shot the line,
an' we went for broke
With a thousand screamin' trucks
And
eleven long-haired friends of Jesus
In a chartreusse microbus
Ah, Rubber Duck to Sod Buster come over. Yeah 10-4, Sod Buster? Listen,you wanna put that microbus in behind the suicide jockey? Yeah, he's haulin dynamite. He needs all the help he can git.
Well we laid a strip fer the Jersey Shore
An' prepared to
cross the line
I could see the bridge 'as lined with bears
But
I didn't have a doggone dime
I sez Pig-Pen, this here's the
Rubber Duck
We just ain't a gonna pay no toll
So we crashed
the gate doin' ninety-eight
I sez, let them truckers roll, 10-4
Cause
we gotta mighty convoy, rockin' through the night
Yeah we gotta
mighty convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on an' join our
convoy, ain't nothin' gonna git in our way
We're gonna roll this
truckin' convoy, cross the USA
Convoy...
Uh, 10-4 Pig-Pen, what's yer 20?
Convoy!
Omaha?! Well they oughta know what to do with them hogs out there fer sure. Well mercy
Convoy!
sakes alive good buddy. We gonna back on outta here. So keep the bugs off yer glass. An' the bears off yer...
Convoy!
tail
We gonna catch ya on the flip-flop. This here's the Rubber Duck on
the side
Convoy!
We gone. Bye, Bye...
Paige - in the phone - Ok, so it's not slow. But it's weird. What the hell was that?
Prue, Piper and Phoebe - over the speakers - Convoy by C.W. McCall.
Paige - in the phone - Cute. Really cute. Play something good.
Prue - over the speakers - Friendly sisterly warning. Those are fighting words to Phoebe and Piper.
Phoebe - over the speakers; angrily - More particularly me!
Piper - over the speakers - Ain't that the truth.
Paige - in the phone - Ok, so play something else then. Sorry.
Phoebe - over the speakers - It's already started. Get ready for Johnny Cash.
Prue and Piper, over the speakers, cheer.
Paige - in the phone - Johnny Cash, give me a break!
Music starts to play:
I
was toting my pack along the long dusty Winnemucca road
When along
came a semi with a high canvas covered load
If your goin' to
Winnemucca, Mack with me you can ride
And so I climbed into the
cab and then I settled down inside
He asked me if I'd seen a road
with so much dust and sand
And I said, "Listen! I've traveled
every road in this here land!"
I've been everywhere,
man
I've been everywhere, man
Crossed the deserts bare,
man
I've breathed the mountain air, man
Travel - I've had my
share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been
to:
Reno
Chicago
Fargo
Minnesota
Buffalo
Toronto
Winslow
Sarasota
Wichita
Tulsa
Ottawa
Oklahoma
Tampa
Panama
Mattawa
LaPaloma
Bangor
Baltimore
Salvador
Amarillo
Tocapillo
Pocotello
Amperdillo
I'm
a Killer
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere,
man
Crossed the deserts bare, man
I've breathed the mountain
air, man
Travel - I've had my share, man
I've been
everywhere
I've been
to:
Boston
Charleston
Dayton
Louisiana
Washington
Houston
Kingston
Texas
(Country)
Monterey
Fairaday
Santa Fe
Tallapoosa
Glen
Rock
Black Rock
Little
Rock
Oskaloosa
Tennessee
Tinnesay
Chicopee
Spirit
Lake
Grand Lake
Devil's Lake
Crater Lake
For Pete's
Sake
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere,
man
Crossed the deserts bare, man
I've breathed the mountain
air, man
Travel - I've had my share, man
I've been
everywhere
I've been
to:
Louisville
Nashville
Knoxville
Omerback
Springfield
Bakersfield
Shreveport
Hackensack
Cadillac
Fond
du
Lac
Davenport
Idaho
Jellico
Argentina
Diamantina
Pasadena
Catalina
See
What I Mean
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere,
man
Crossed the deserts bare, man
I've breathed the mountain
air, man
Travel - I've had my share, man
I've been
everywhere
I've been
to:
Pittsburgh
Parkersburg
Gravelbourg
Colorado
Ellensburg
Rexburg
Vicksburg
Eldorado
Larimore
Adimore
Haverstraw
Chadanocka
Shaska
Nebraska
Alaska
Opalacka
Baraboo
Waterloo
Kalamazoo
Kansas
City
Sioux City
Cedar City
Dodge City
What A
Pity
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere,
man
Crossed the deserts bare, man
I've breathed the mountain
air, man
Travel - I've had my share, man
I've been
everywhere
I've been everywhere
Paige - in the phone - That wasn't Johnny Cash!
Prue - over the speakers - Yes, that's Johnny Cash.
Paige - in the phone - What happened to the slow songs?
Piper - over the speakers - They died.
Phoebe - over the speakers - Murder On Music Row.
Prue laughs.
Prue - over the speakers - Haven't you quoted songs for enough today. Play more!
Phoebe - over the speakers - Which ones?
Piper - over the speakers - Don't matter. They're all good. Paige, if you lived with us as a kid, you'd like these songs too. We grew up on them. Do you think Grams allowed us to listen to Rock 'n Roll as a child? Heck no, she grew us up on Alabama, Exile, Loretta Lynn, George Jones, The Stanley Brothers, Waylon Jennings, Willie Nelson, Roger Miller, Merle Haggard, Earle Scruggs, Lester Flats, Kenny Rogers, June Carter and Johnny Cash, Johnny Paycheck, John Denver, Jerry Reed, Dolly Parton, David Alan Coe and then the newbies: George Strait and Alan Jackson; then the ones Grams made us listen to: Tom T. Hall, Jim Reeves and Little Jimmy Dickens. - she giggles -
Phoebe - over the speakers - Well, Piper, here comes Jerry Reed. East Bound and Down.
The Music starts to play:
East
bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they
say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to
get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit"
run.
Keep your foot hard on the pedal. Son, never mind them
brakes.
Let it all hang out 'cause we got a run to make.
The
boys are thirsty in Atlanta and there's beer in Texarkana.
And
we'll bring it back no matter what it takes.
East bound and
down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they say can't
be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to get
there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit"
run.
East bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're
gonna do what they say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go
and a short time to get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol'
"Bandit" run.
Ol' Smokey's got them ears on and he's
hot on your trail.
He ain't gonna rest 'til you're in jail.
So
you got to dodge 'im and you got to duck 'im,
you got to keep that
diesel truckin'.
Just put that hammer down and give it hell.
East
bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they
say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to
get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit" run.
Paige - in the phone - I know that song! That was in Smokey and the Bandit! They had a country song for that!
Piper - over the speakers - Yeah, it kinda signifies us. We've got a long way to go and a short time to get there…
Prue - over the speakers - Doing something they say can't be done.
Phoebe laughs.
Piper - over the speakers - Ok, according to the map, we're coming up on Elko in a few minutes.
Prue - over the speakers - Ok, so where are we eating?
Piper - over the speakers - Pizza Hut or some kind of pizza place.
Paige - in the phone - Finally, some good food.
Connor - in the phone; to Paige - We're eating Pizza?
Paige - in the phone; to Connor - Yes, sweetie.
Connie - in the phone; to Paige - What's Pizza?
Paige - in the phone - I guess you'll find out in a few meters.
Piper's car pulls off the road, the rest following her. Piper gets out of her car, grabs Chris and Leo gets Wyatt.
Parking Lot
Piper - Lets go eat, sweetie.
Wyatt - YAY!
Leo - It looks like he's happy. What about Chris?
Piper - I think he's hungry, but not showing it.
Phoebe - getting Courtney - She's starved.
Cole - Famished.
Phoebe - Oh baby, lets get him something, Cole.
Cole - Not the baby, me.
Phoebe slaps Cole on his shoulder.
Cole - Let's eat. He's hungry too.
Phoebe - He better be.
Paige - My two can't wait to get some of that Pizza.
Prue - Where are my Twins?
Leo - pointing towards the building - They went that way.
Prue - Andy, follow them.
Andy walks off.
Richard - getting Connor - Let's eat.
They all walk in. the guys have a table, the kids have a table and the girls have a table.
The Girls Table
Piper - So how is the trip so far?
Phoebe - Pretty good… besides the dipper part. Cole didn't like that.
Paige - Not at all. I swore I heard him in the car without the phone. Our trip has gone smooth, I like it.
Prue - So far, so good.
Phoebe, Paige and Prue - I just wish I knew where we were going. - Piper looks amused - Well, guess I'm not alone.
They laugh.
Piper - I would tell you, but it's too dangerous.
Phoebe - Piper, what if we get separated. We won't know how to reconnect.
Piper - Nicer try. That is what the phones are for. Remember them, we're been talking on them non-stop.
Phoebe snaps her fingers in a 'shucks' way.
Paige - Well, other then that, we may need… our cell phones may die. What if we get separated, as Phoebe said?
Piper - Well uh… Paige, you made that up!
Paige - Maybe, but it's a good question.
Prue - Actually, it is. What would happen if one of our cell phones died?
Phoebe - Or we forget them in the motel?
Piper - You take yours in?
Paige - Hers will be the first to go dead.
Piper - I charge mine in the car!
Phoebe - Well, we could. But I don't go anywhere without my cell.
Paige - Me either.
Piper - Who is gonna call? They think we're dead?
Prue - And if you answer, guess what…
Paige - What?
Piper - They find out!
Phoebe - What if Elise needs me?
Piper - She's in trouble. Phoebe, your probably being replaced at work. She, along with everyone else, thinks we're dead!
Phoebe - What about Spencer Ricks?
Piper - He's probably celebrating.
Phoebe - If he upped and died, I would too.
Paige - Ok, so no more cell phone. What if we lose it? You know, thief.
Piper - Ok, here's the deal. I'll tell you the planned route for the day, that's it. When it's down to the last day, all I can say is keep up.
Phoebe - You're not telling us.
Piper - And allow six days of traveling for nothing, no way.
Prue - Is it really bad?
Piper - I told the realtor to just tell me the streets to take, no cities.
Phoebe - Can I turn around now?
Piper - Phoebe, we have traveled an estimated 410 miles, do you really want to turn around now?
Phoebe - serious - I do if we're going somewhere dangerous. I'm not raising my kids in an unstable environment.
Piper - urgent - NO, no, God no. Phoebe, I'm takin' Wyatt and Chris. San Francisco is more dangerous than this place… It's just so not us. The place is odd, really odd.
Phoebe - Ok, so I'll stick around.
Prue - Ok, the guys are turning in for coffee over there, how 'bout we leave after they get it and make them drive while we sleep the entire way.
Paige - Sounds good to me.
Piper stands up and lays down the money and tip and walks over to the men.
Piper - You guys ready?
Leo - As soon as our cup of coffee comes.
Piper - Good, we'll be freshening up.
Cole - while the girls get the kids and walk away - Good, we can finish 3.
Richard - I'm not so sure about that. I'd say 4.
Leo - They're faster than that. They're bathroom break usually means capital D.
Cole - Does that mean demon?
Leo - Yes, Cole. But I said the code, couldn't we have just left it that way?
Andy - We can finish the first cup of coffee at least.
Richard - At least.
Cole - Yep, at least.
Leo laughs and rolls his eyes.
Ten minutes and three cups of coffee later
Richard hands Cole a $10 bill after the girls come out of the bathroom.
Cole - Mm-hmm.
Phoebe - What did you 2 make a bet on?
Richard - Uh, uh. How many cups we could finish before you get back. Wow, my throat is hot. I bet Cole's is hotter!
Cole - catching on - Oh, yeah. Really hot. Hot as…
Phoebe - Don't even say it. - Cole closes his mouth before saying 'hell' - Good boy.
Piper - Lets roll.
They start to walk out.
Waitress - Ma'am. The men and children?
Piper - Oh, sorry. It's with ours. You can check if you want to. It's there.
The waitress double checks.
Waitress - Sorry.
Piper - laughing - It's ok. Could've happened to anyone - they exit -
Parking Lot
When they put the children in the back seats, everyone heads to their respectful passenger seat.
Outside Car #1
Leo - Piper?
Piper - I'll guide you. Like last time. But you guys snoozed the whole way.
Outside Car #2
Cole - What's going on here, Phoebe?
Phoebe - My turn. - she tosses him the keys - Follow Leo.
Outside Car #3
Richard - Paige, I'm still sore from the testicle incident.
Paige - Too bad.
Outside Car #4
Andy - Really?
Prue - Knock yourself out.
Andy - Cool!
The guy's head to the driver's side, the girls get in the passenger seat.
Car #3
Piper - over the speakers - Ok, just follow 553 until I-80.
Leo - over the speakers - Oh, gosh. I've never felt so nervous about driving.
Piper - over the speakers - Don't. You can't get lost. We don't get off I-80 until Lincoln, Nebraska.
Prue, Andy, Phoebe, Cole, Paige and Richard - over the speakers; in the phone - LINCOLN, NEBRASKA!
Piper - over the speakers - Ut oh. That's still on.
Phoebe - over the speakers - It never went off.
Piper - over the speakers - Oh, I'm sorry. When we get off I-80, we get on to U.S. 77 for a little while. Oh, 2-4 miles the most. Then U.S. 2 for a good while.
Prue - over the speakers - Thanks for telling us a little.
Piper - over the speakers - You're welcome.
Prue - over the speakers - Hey, Pheebs. Do you have "On the Road Again" by Willie Nelson?
Phoebe - over the speakers - I wouldn't have the perfect traveling collection if I didn't.
Piper - over the speakers - Yeah, wasn't he the #1 traveling song on CMT's 40 Greatest Traveling Songs?
Phoebe - over the speakers - Yeah, it was.
Music starts to play over the speakers and Paige just shakes her head and puts her head in her hands:
On
the road again
Just can't wait to get on the road again
The
life I love is makin' music with my friends
And I can't wait to
get on the road again
On the road again
Goin' places that I've
never been
Seein' things that I may never see again,
And I
can't wait to get on the road again.
On the road again
Like
a band of gypsies we go down the highway
We're the best of
friends
Insisting that the world be turnin' our way
And our
way
Is on the road again
Just can't wait to get on the road
again
The life I love is makin' music with my friends
And I
can't wait to get on the road again
On the road again
Like
a band of gypsies we go down the highway
We're the best of
friends
Insisting that the world be turnin' our way
And our
way
Is on the road again
Just can't wait to get on the road
again
The life I love is makin' music with my friends
And I
can't wait to get on the road again
And I can't wait to get on the
road again
Phoebe - over the speakers - Huh? Huh?
Paige - in the phone - You're a bunch of bolts.
Piper - over the speakers - We'll get her.
Prue - over the speakers - We'll bring out the Patsy Cline.
Phoebe - over the speakers - The ONLY song by Pasty Cline in this car is Willie Nelson's version of Crazy, Missy. She was a wonderful entertainer… for the old folks home. Put the sleepless right to sleep. Way to slow.
Paige - in the phone - Finally, sanity!
Phoebe - over the speakers - I just… err!
Prue - over the speakers - Just to spice thing up, put in Operation Bird.
Phoebe - over the speakers - Okey dokey!
Music stats to play:
Well my throat was dry and it was getting late
I was at this bar on the interstate
When a guy with this bird on his shoulder
Walking through the door
Yeah
He proceeded to tell me the wildest thing
He said, "Sir, this bird of mine can sing
Like no other bird you have ever heard before"
Well I kinda looked at the guy and said "Oh really?"
He turned to the bird and said, "Do ole Willie"
When the bird started singing I almost fell on the floor
Whiskey River take my mind
Don't let her memory torture me
Whiskey River don't run dry
You're all I've got take care of me
Well if that ain't the durndest thing
Well I thought, what a heck of a thing
A man could get rich makin' that bird sing
And I could fell this wild idear coming on strong
And besides, I'm sittin' here with two weeks pay
And I'd probably blow it on beer anyway
Then he said "Hey what'll you hear him sing like George Jones"
He stopped loving her today
They placed a wreath upon his door
And soon they'll carry him away
He stopped loving her today
I said "Well that does it sir
Yep, I'd like to buy that bird,
Would $500 take him off your hands? Huh?"
Well he thought for a while and he said "Alright"
And handed me the bird and said "Goodnight"
He counted my money and out the door he ran
Well I was thinkin' I'd found the rainbow's end
That the money would soon be pouring in
When suddenly the bird flew out the door and was gone
Well then it hit me, and I got boiling mad
I knew right then that I'd been had
And as he flew out into the night
He was singing this song
On the road again
Just can't wait to get on the road again
Somebody stop that bird
The life I love is making money with my friend
And I can't wait to get on the road again
On the road again
My bird
Just can't wait to get on the road again
My $500
The life I love is making money with my friend
Oh!
And I can't wait to get on the road again
Somebody get me a BB Gun.
On the road again.
I want that bird!
I just can't wait to get on the road again
This is for the birds
The life I love is making money with my friend
And I can't wait to get on the road again
Buy me a drink somebody
On the Road Again
Paige - in the phone; dying of laughter - What, who, where and why?
Phoebe - over the speakers - 'What' is a song about being ripped off, 'who' is Jerry Reed, 'where' is who knows and 'why' is he likes to see people laugh. The name of the song is "Whisky River: The Bird with Excerpts/He Stopped Loving Her Today/On the Road Again" aka the Bird.
Paige - in the phone; still laughing - Ok, I'm a believer now.
Leo - over the speakers; to Piper - Piper, Oasis? Is it gonna disappear?
Piper - over the speakers; to Leo - I honestly don't know sweetie, when I got this map, it did on several occasions. I was copying it one minute, then the next it was gone. I skipped to the next scene and it was back!
Leo - over the speakers; to Piper - It better not, I'm telling you right now.
Piper - over the speakers; to Leo - Oh Leo!
Paige - in the phone - Are you two having problems?
Piper - over the speakers - Besides he's paranoid, no.
Leo - over the speakers; to Piper - We don't have to stop do we?
Piper - over the speakers - Ok, in about 5 miles, we're pulling over to a gas station. Fill up! I don't care if it's .2 inches away from full, fill her up. We're going into Air Force's and we don't want to be the cause of an explosion no more then we already are. Ok, guys, do you understand the urgencies of these actions. We need to turn off our cell phones. Use the bathroom, make sure your kids do, and your men. Ok as soon as we pull off, we'll be ready to go. We turn them off in-between Silver Zone and Proctor.
Phoebe - over the speakers - Ok, but Piper, what if we get separated, what will happen?
Piper - over the speakers - I've got it covered. We'll stay here for 30 minutes to make sure everyone is finished eating and using the bathroom, excreta.
Paige - in the phone - Ok.
Prue - over the speakers - I sure hope you know what your doing, Piper.
Piper - over the speakers - I do. - they pull off at a small gas station Piper gets in the back of her tractor, and pull out her electronics, she pulls out her laptop, printer and an extension cord and then she looks around and finds a mechanic - Excuse me sir, could you help me for a moment?
Mechanic - Yes, Ma'am, what do you need?
Piper - I need a plug in for my extension cord, but unfortunately cars haven't got that feature yet.
The mechanic laughs.
Mechanic - Sure, right over here. Now, your not powering a circus, are you?
Piper - No, just my laptop.
Mechanic - winking - Good, cause I'd have a field day explaining that one to boss. I just can't resist beautiful and sexy women.
Piper blushes.
Piper - I'm flattered, really I am, but I'm taken.
Mechanic - So am I.
Piper, after plugging in the cord, quickly walks away.
Piper - Ok, here we go…
She plugs in the laptop, hooks the printer and the computer together and adds paper to the printer. She pulls up her document of the map and prints out three copies of Utah. She puts everything back in her bags in the car and walks over to Prue, Phoebe and Paige at the snacks.
Prue - talking to the others - Here comes Piper.
Piper - Hey guys. - she hands them the papers - This is the route we're taking through Utah. Follow this and you'll be ok. I want us girls to drive through Utah, not the guys.
Phoebe - Ok so, just follow the highlighted sections, that's it.
Piper - Pretty much. Ok, stretch, eat, bathroom break, lets roll, lets roll. I'm going over there, - pointing to Wal-Mart not to far away - ok. Leo. Take care of the boys, I'll be right back.
Piper gets in her car and drives off.
Time Lapse
Piper - getting out of her car with about 15 bags - I really didn't know what to get them, so I just got them a little of everything. The girls got girly things of course, and the boys got boy toys, the babies: Chris and Melissa, I got them musical pop up books and little things like that. - she hands a bag to Prue - I got Andy, Jr. some trucks, some books, a CD player, some CD's, a hand-held movie theater; I got Patricia a baby doll with the works, pop up books. I didn't get the babies any. I also got Patricia a hand-held DVD player and a Barbie doll. I got Melissa additional a rattle, teddy bear and a large pillow tiger.
Prue - You didn't have to Piper.
Piper - Yeah, I did. I said we could go to the lake, but we can't. We have to get through Utah. It's too dangerous. Too much of a risk at getting lost.
Phoebe - Ok, so you got our kids some toys, how sweet.
Piper - I got Collin and Courtney, other then the pop up books, baby dolls, soft trucks, rattles, blocks and a leap frog for toddlers.
Phoebe - taking the bags - Thanks.
Piper - I got Connor and Connie… Pop up Books, CD player, CD's, hand-held DVD players, older toys, and something I'm sure if I don't mute will drive their mommy crazy: Gameboy's.
Paige - You better mute that. - Piper mutes it and hands them to Paige - Thank you.
Leo - Ok, so what did you get our kids?
Piper - Wyatt: truck, soft blocks; look out, some stuffed animals and a large pillow like Melissa's. Chris got a large pillow too, rattle, soft blocks like Wyatt, a glow worm and a soft-music-playing toy, a cat.
Leo takes the bags and puts it in the back between the car seats. Cole, Andy and Richard does the same.
Phoebe - Who gives you the most trouble. Collin screams mostly.
Paige - Yeah.
Piper - Wyatt. Chris sleeps.
Paige - Your lucky on Chris, ours scream, cries, or worse, starts 20 questions.
Phoebe - Mine doesn't do that.
Prue - Andy, Jr. still does. But Patricia had me asking twenty questions. When I still had amnesia, Patricia and Andy, Jr. use to disappear and come back a few hours later. I just gave up on looking for them. Once I found a man in my living room, then he quickly orbed away.
Patricia - Chris! I stoled him.
Piper - Big Chris?
Andy, Jr. - Uh-huh. He scolded us.
Patricia - Maybe you, but he didn't me.
Andy, Jr. - Yeah right, Chris scolds anyone he pleases. - Patricia put down her head bashfully - I thought so.
Piper - Is everyone ready?
Prue - looking at her clan - Yep, they're ready.
Phoebe - looking at Cole - Yes, we are ready, we are ready to join the highway men.
Piper - When we get out of Utah, you have to play that… ok, Paige?
Paige - Um, ok, their good, right.
Connor and Connie - Righty-ho.
Richard - Let's get this over with.
Piper - I couldn't agree with you more.
They all pack up, double check their stuff and head out, Piper in the helm. They drive all the way through Utah smoothly, and eventually make it to Evanston. They spend the night there.