Sorry for the confusion with yesterday's posting. I'm not sure what happened there. But many thanks to those who alerted me to the mess up. Hopefully this won't be as redundant, lol. And I'd love to hear from you, what you think and where you'd like to see things go. Love knowing what other people are thinking;-)

"Stay with me tonight?" Then looking around the room and realizing it was his house, she revised her question. "Or rather, let me stay with you?"

Jim couldn't deny the appeal her suggestion held. He hadn't admitted it in years but the last few days had made him realize he did still love her in a dark foreboding kind of way. And she was still beautiful; there was no denying that at all. But would he be able to handle it tomorrow? As he gazed across at her, he couldn't answer his own question. "Nancy, I don't think that's such a good idea," he said softly, achingly.

She blinked and drew back in her chair, physically putting more space between them. "I thought…well, you seemed…and I…"

Jim couldn't remember her ever having being at quite such a loss for words. In fact, she used to singe his ears with her words. But if he had changed, then she had too. Instead of striking back, she got quiet. "I'm sorry," she finally said quietly.

It was then he began to melt, feeling more like putty than he had in years. "Nancy, honey….it isn't that I don't want to. You've always been irresistible to me, you know. But with our history," he shrugged, "I just don't see anything good coming out of it. It would end up a one night stand or a brief affair and then we'd blow apart and you deserve better than that; we both do."

"I just thought….well, I wanted to see if the old spark was still there," she replied with in a deeper tone.

Smirking, Jim raised his brows and then reached over to take her hand in his. "Baby, I can answer that one easy," he said in a gravely voice. "You still got it as far as I'm concerned. It isn't easy saying no to what you're offering. But things have been kinda okay between us this visit, more than kinda okay…almost good. I don't want to ruin that. We got Ellie out of a bad situation and we've managed to get along in the process. Let's…let's call that good and not push our luck. Okay?"

Nancy looked into his sparkling blue eyes and saw kindness there; an expression she hadn't seen from him in a long time. She could also see that he was telling the truth; he was feeling it. Some things a woman never forgets about her man and one is the look he gives her when he's feeling more than he can express. Seeing that look in him made her realize how dangerous her suggestion was for him, for both of them. In that one instant she realized why he'd never found anyone else. Oh they'd talked about it before but in his eyes she saw the depth of his truth. He still loved her. Despite all the bad times, all the angry words, all the dishonesty, and all the years and miles between them, he still loved her.

There was a time when she might have used that knowledge as a weapon but too much had passed, too many years without him. Her need to hurt him was long gone and as she thought back, she wondered why she ever felt it to begin with. He hadn't been the best husband, gone for long hours, married to his job as much as he was to her. But he had also had his moments, times when he dropped everything for her and later for Ellie. And when he'd realized Ellie wasn't his, he'd tried hard to overlook it. He tried to be a good father but it wasn't until this trip that she understood that he really didn't know how to do that, not back then at least. All he had known was what not to do.

So here she sat, staring into eyes that seemed to be caressing her and wishing…what? To wish they'd never divorced seemed to defeat this new understanding; it had taken that to get them to where they were now. But where were they? He was interested, she knew that much. But he was wary too…and for all the right reasons. He didn't want things to go back to the way they were any more than she did. So now what?

As if he were reading her mind, Jim shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. "Well, maybe we should get some sleep?"

"Yeah, sleep," she nodded.

He took their glasses and the bottle back to the kitchen. Smiling, she listened as he rinsed the glasses and put them in his dishwasher and then put the bottle back in the cabinet. If only he had done things like that before, she mused…if only….

They walked slowly into the hallway and to their rooms. Nancy's door was first and as she paused at her doorway, she looked back at him. He was watching her with an odd expression, almost a hungry one. But no sooner than she had glimpsed it, he'd changed his demeanor and it was gone. "Well, good night," he said softly, almost shyly.

She smiled back at him. "Good night, Jimmy." Then in a courageous move, she leaned over and kissed him on his cheek, feeling him tense and then relax, almost welcoming the contact. As she stepped away, she relaxed too. At least he hadn't reacted badly. Maybe there was hope, just maybe…

Jim couldn't sleep, not with her just down the hall, not after what she had suggested and that tease of a kiss at her door. Various scenarios kept running through his mind, memories from all those years ago, visions of how he had wanted things to be between them back then, thoughts of how he didn't think he'd mind having things now. But alongside all of that his mind was running scenarios of how it most likely would be, hurt feelings, arguments, anger, and more damage. He rolled over in his bed, trying to get comfortable, to block it all out of his mind and find some peace. He just wanted to go to sleep and forget about it.

Glancing at the clock, he realized he'd been lying there over an hour. It was rare for Jim to have that much trouble going to sleep. Staying asleep was another matter. His body was getting older and his sleep patterns less routine. Maybe it was all the years of working different shifts, of working so many years on the night shift, maybe not. He didn't know. Still, he was always able to go to sleep quickly…well, almost always. So why was tonight different?

"Damn", he breathed out into the dark room. He was back to thinking about her. Frustrated he sat up, unsure of what to do next. His body decided he should take advantage of the opportunity for a trip to the bathroom, another sign he was getting older. He chuckled as he finished up in his bathroom and washed his hands. "Good thing you said no", he muttered sarcastically. "You're not the guy she remembers."

With a sigh, he returned to his bed. What now, he asked himself inwardly. Read? Yeah… He turned on the bedside lamp and reached for the book that sat next to it. He'd been trying to get this one read over the last few weeks but hadn't made much progress. Well, tonight promised several chapters worth of reading.

He'd started the third chapter of the night when he heard a soft knock at his door. Grimacing as he closed the book, he slid out of bed and walked to the door to open it. He wasn't surprised to see Nancy on the other side. What did surprise him was the obvious evidence of her crying. "Nancy?" he asked, wondering why she was so upset. She'd seemed okay when they said good night.

"I…I had a dream, a nightmare really. And I…" she crumpled into his chest, her face buried on his shoulder.

Instinctively Jim lifted his arms to hold her as he took a deep breath. This night was going to be longer than he could have imagined.