Still not mine. :) This chapter is a little choppy - it's a means to an end. I'm typing the next chapter as we speak :) Again, sorry for the 'choppiness.' =)
4/30/18 (Updated the end. I forgot where I was taking it so we're doing something completely different! I know it's been FOREVER since I updated, so much has happened, I hope my writing voice is still similar and adequate :) I'm a bit out of practice :\ Not beta'd and none of the characters are mine!)
"Let's go get her," Daryl paced in the cargo bay. "What are we waiting for?"
"We're waiting for a better plan than to just go in guns blazing," Zoe informed the newcomers. "We've already attacked once and he'll be expecting us this time. He's hoping we do something that stupid."
"So what do we do?" Rick asked, sleeves rolled up and ready to get to work.
"Nothing."
All eyes turned to Mal as he voiced his solution.
"Niska wants me. I will message him and let him know I'll accept an even trade. Me for River. He'll have to come here because we're land-locked. Once River is off the space station an Alliance ship waiting nearby will 'sterilize' it."
"Do you think he'll meet you here?" Lori added.
"He's not overly accommodating, but he and I have a complicated relationship. I don't think he'll pass up the oppor…"
Mal was cut off by the shrill alarm that alerted them an WAVE was incoming. Eight feet tripped over themselves, stairs, and each other as Mal, Daryl, Jayne, and Simon raced for the bridge. The race was futile, Daryl didn't know how to answer a WAVE and Jayne and Simon dared not – so it was Mal that was allowed on the bridge first.
Mal hit the button to accept the WAVE and instantly the pruny, snake-eyed face of Adalai Niska filled the console screen. From his slicked-back grey hair, to his wiry, tiny glasses, to the greasy smile smeared across his lips – Daryl found everything about the man revolting.
"He better not touch her," he growled.
"Growin' fond? Got a think for little girls?" Jayne teased maliciously.
"Niska," Mal greeted the screen and everyone else quieted and payed close attention. "You seem to…"
"Before you start," the tinny Russian accent interrupted him from the speakers, "I vuld hate for us to vaste our time so I vill get straight to ze point…"
"You wasted time from the time you took River. Let me see her," Mal demanded.
"I vill do you one better, Captain Reynolds. My men are on zeir vay back to you vith her body."
Daryl left Mal, Simon, and Jayne on the bridge; all silent and in shock. He stalked down the hall toward the kitchen, his stupor also gripping the deepest parts of him. Carol and Lori waited at the table, watching his slow and calculated steps. Blind to them, his anger broke into a fury of punches against a metal wall of Serenity. Carol gasped as she watched blood start to stream from his knuckles, down his arm, and even causing little pools to trickle down the wall.
"Fuck!" he cried, kicked the spot he's just punched and collapsed against it.
She'd been that anguished at one point, after seeing the babe that she'd raised and tried to protect from the world – shot in the head. By Rick. What had happened that Daryl was full of such grief?
"Daryl," she quietly entered the hall. "What happened?"
"She's dead," he muttered, keeping his hand in his heads. He drew his knees up and rested his elbows on them.
Carol caught a gasp in her throat.
Silence stretched. She had seen him lose people before. First, his brother. She attributed him taking that so well to there still being a glimmer of hope that he was alive. Then they lost Jim, not a big loss to Daryl. Then the names and bodies kept building. Finally when it was Sophia, her beloved daughter – she watched the human part of him fight for something. He wasn't the survivalist anymore, nor was he broken – he was just human. Then she watched him through the loss of Dale, then Andrea, and some of Herschel's people. It got to him now. Death. Like he finally understood how finite it was.
He was realizing the finality of River's loss. What transpired between them that he cared so much? He didn't react like this to Dale or Andrea and he had known them much longer than he'd known River.
"Why is this hitting you so hard?" she immediately wished she could take back her awful question.
"Just leave me alone, please."
The crew spent the night, sleepless, wandering around the bridge and the cargo hold. Kaylee dabbed a wet cloth around Simon's tearful puffy eyes, everyone stayed very clear of the Captain, and the Earth-that-Was group stayed mostly to themselves, wondering what River had said behind that rock to have such an impact on Daryl.
Daryl paced. Daryl sat. Daryl stood up and paced again. When River had mentioned life anew and that she'd already seen them together, he knew it was stupid, but he imagined little ones running around. At first, his chronic bachelor state led him to believe nobody would ever call him 'Pops.' When the infection broke out, he knew the nails had been hammered into the coffin of any hopes he had for fatherhood. When River spoke of a future that he was pretty sure was going to happen – she was a 'reader' and all – he couldn't help but to buy into the fantasy, even if it only lasted 2 seconds. 2 seconds before his entire world fell apart. 2 seconds before she helped him escape and threw herself at the captors. 2 seconds he saw her frantically pushing him away so only she would be taken. 2 seconds before he was the last of the crew to see her alive.
Daryl sat back down on Jayne's weight bench, dropped his head to his hands and closed his eyes – trying to memorize how she looked, smelled.
"Rick, Daryl," Captain Reynolds walked down the stairs with Zoe and Jayne in tow "Glenn, Maggie, T-Dog, we need a plan for tomorrow. Whoever is delivering her body isn't leaving this planet alive."
"We can't just be murdering folks," Carol offered from afar.
"Why not?" Daryl hissed.
"I haven't ever killed anyone still alive," Maggie sided with Carol. In the next few minutes T-Dog and Glenn were on Team Carol as well.
"I'll gut those bastards from waist to throat," Daryl growled low.
"They may just hover low and drop her body out while still moving," Jayne offered. "A crew I ran with at one time did stuff like that."
"Won't the Alliance destroy them once they realize River was on that ship?" Zoe reminded.
"I want to personally kill someone for this. The Alliance already gets Niska, I want these guys," Mal stated.
"We don't know how big of a crew it will be," Zoe thought aloud.
"It's body transport," Jayne scoffed, "Maybe 3 at most."
"I was a Sherriff, I usually like upholding the law," Rick fidgeted, "I'll be there, but I'd rather hang back as back up."
"Suits me," Mal agreed.
The fighters huddled for almost an hour discussing strategy and timing. It was agreed that Mal would kill one, Daryl would kill one, one would be held for Simon to kill, and they rest were fair game. Simon joined halfway through the discussion. The vengeance would be nice, but it still wouldn't bring back his mei mei. So much had been risked. So many dreams he'd had of growing older with her being the aunt to his little rascals the he and Kaylee were sure to have. If River ever had children he thought he'd make a great uncle. Spoiling their children together and always having each others' backs. The 'Verse was a scary place to be alone. She had been. She had been all alone on that space station. Horrible thoughts went through his head about which torture it was that killed her. Electroshock? Cutting? Burning? He turned his mind away from that as Kaylee and Lori walked up.
"Tomorrow is going to need you all focused. Do you want to try to sleep?" Lori reasoned.
"I can't sleep," Simon shook his head.
"Simon," Zoe offered, "Let's go look at my weapons and you can choose what you want to use and we can practice. I can't be there," she rubbed her baby bump, "so I'm going to help you inflict the most pain. It's my specialty." Simon and Kaylee followed Zoe up to the armory locker. Cutting? Burning? He turned his mind away from that as Kaylee and Lori walked up.
"Tomorrow is going to need you all focused. Do you want to try to sleep?" Lori reasoned.
"I can't sleep," Simon shook his head.
"Simon," Zoe offered, "Let's go look at my weapons and you can choose what you want to use and we can practice. I can't be there," she rubbed her baby bump, "so I'm going to help you inflict the most pain. It's my specialty." Simon and Kaylee followed Zoe up to the armory locker.
"I can't sleep," Daryl agreed. "You got a blade sharpener?" he asked Jayne. Jayne had a couple, so they made their way to the kitchen to prepare all devices of death and torture.
"I'll join you in a bit, hon," Rick patted Lori's arm and sent her off. "I wanted to talk to you," Rick turned to Mal, "I've been somewhere like this before. What's going through your head?"
"A strong urge to kill some folk, Sherriff."
Rick chuckled, "Well, I think we can safely say I'm out of my jurisdiction so I won't even try to stop you. Like I said, I even have your back. I just want to take a backseat on this because there are times I already question my humanity. Have you heard about Sophia?"
Mal shook his head. "Not really. Just, that was Carol's little girl that passed, right?"
Rick nodded. "She didn't pass. I shot her in the head." Mal's silence invited Rick to explain. "So you know about the infection, what gets glossed over is what we went through daily. One day we were trying to get to a fort that we had heard wasn't overrun with the infected – we call 'em 'walkers.' Well we got to this part of the road that was blocked by an accident, a BIG accident. We were scavenging for water, food, clothes, whatever we could get our hands on. Then, it's like it was out of nowhere, a 'herd' – a large group of these walkers come up and there's no way to explain it. Their skin is rotting off of them, some of them so much you can see their skeleton. The smell like decay and death. They walk on twisted ankles, they have chunks of body missing from where they were eaten when they were alive. They are mindless until they hear you or see you. So we hid under cars – anywhere we could hide. I gave an all clear nod and we started coming out from the cars and Sophia had a left over walker come up on her. Well, the sound they make, like a gasp through wet blanket, attracted the attention of more and I tried to help her. I did for a time, but ultimately I didn't save her. I will never not see accusations in Carol's eyes when she looks at me. I was her leader and I failed. So I'll ask again, Mal, what's going through your head?"
"You want a confession? That I feel responsible for this? Is that what you want?" Mal's tone dropped to an accusation.
"If you feel like this is your fault, it can corrupt every decision you make from here on out."
"It is my fault. I should have killed Niska when he took me and tortured me. I shouldn't have left that space station until he was dead."
"Avenge her, but do not let this be the moment that defines you. Don't lose your compass. I lost mine for a while and more people died because of it. You're still their Captain."
So many people wanted to talk. Mal just wanted blood. He'd never felt blood-lust in his life before. He spent the rest of the night talking when people wanted to talk, but in between chats he built up the joy of knowing Niska was dead and the glory that was at hand with the death of those who did Niska's bidding. To think, all of this over some crappy medicine on a train job.
Daryl and Jayne watched the black satin sky ease to indigo and then erupt with clouds of pink and orange as the sun stretched above the horizon marking dawn. Simon was practicing slicing as thinly as possible into canned processed meat, and Mal was going over the attack plan…again. When, at 6:20am local time a transport flew overhead and set to dock beside them, the crew jumped to action, every person frantic to get into position.
The fighters exited through the cargo door as Niska's transport touched down. The dust settled, the transport door opened, every fighter tightened their grip on their weapon.