4: Damn Door
Anaya shifted uneasily at her desk, trying to avoid drumming her fingers. She nervously glanced up at the clock for the tenth time in the past five minutes. Less than fifteen minutes until I have to choose between saving my life and my career. For her part, Samara had remained silent since Shepard's last update. The justicar sat next to her in a deep meditative trance, a look of peace on her face as a blue aura shimmered around her. I wish she didn't have to shine like that. Makes me feel like she's about to Warp my ass into oblivion. I just hope that Shepard-
Her omni-tool pinged, bringing her out of her thoughts. She quickly checked the sender ID. Thank the Goddess! "It's from Shepard."
The justicar remained still. "Read quickly, detective."
Anaya knew it was an ultimatum. She frantically scanned through the text on her omni-tool. Merc leader neutralized... Normandy coming... Evidence against Pitne For... "There!" She exclaimed the last word aloud, prompting the justicar to turn toward her. "The fugitive was smuggled out of Nos Astra three days ago aboard the AML Demeter. It's a human shipping vessel that runs a route spanning half the known galaxy." She looked up in dismay at the warrior. "They stopped on Sur'Kesh and the Citadel already. It's heading for Noveria right now, if the fugitive is still on board."
Samara closed her eyes, giving a soft sigh. "It is alright. Thank you for your assistance, detective." She looked back at Anaya. "I will now go straight to Nos Astra to board Shepard's vessel and leave the planet. I trust that will satisfy your superiors."
"Wait," Anaya said, looking back at the message. "His ship, the Normandy, is already on its way here. Docking clearance overridden using Spectre authority."
The justicar gazed with her unbreakable poker face, though Anaya suspected she was surprised. "That is unusual. I would not expect a man of Shepard's reputation to invoke his Spectre status outside of an emergency."
Anaya read through to the end of the note, looking at the evidence against the volus. The name of the merchant's "gift" to the Eclipse jumped out at her, prompting her eyes to widen. Oh shit.
"It is."
"John!"
The yell, with that particular voice and inflection, had been engraved into his subconscious. It was a trigger for the Spectre, one that had meant only one thing to him ever since he'd first heard it two years before:
Move your ass now!
His body had already complied before he had time to consider blinking, the man rolling to the side before thinking about the fact that he was already behind cover.
If he hadn't, he would've been hit by the metal storage tank that had been sailing straight for him.
A red mist spread through the air around him as the tank burst, burning his eyes and lungs as he stumbled out of the cloud. He slammed his eyes shut and coughed heavily. That wasn't the toxic stuff Pitne For was talking about, was it? He hacked again as the rest of his squad continued to fight off a wave of Eclipse mercs.
Or, at least, Garrus and Miranda did.
Tali was gunning right for their leader, a fury in her luminous eyes that the N7 operative had never seen before. She looked so driven, so focused...
But she wasn't paying attention to the canister rising into the air behind her.
The man tried to warn her, but all that came out was another cough as the man watched her turn toward the thing. The woman turned just in time to land a single shot, a glancing blow, as it flew toward her. Her arm came up, a futile effort to protect herself from the object. The mouthpiece on her helmet flashed briefly as she said something that was lost to his ears in the chaos of the firefight.
She vanished in a cloud of the same red dust that had engulfed Shepard mere moments before.
John sprinted directly into the cloud, wheezing the whole time as he ignored the rounds that glanced off his shield. His lungs screamed at him to get out of the crimson fog, but he persevered. He found his target, a dark figure on the ground amidst the haze of red. He gingerly picked her up, noticing that her wrist was making an unnatural angle with the rest of her arm. The quarian let out a soft whimper as he Charged out of the cloud and into cover near the back of the room.
"Tali, can you hear me?"
She responded with an ear-splitting scream as her body glowed blue. John's eyes widened with surprise, then slammed shut as the familiar feeling of a Warp ate away at his abdomen. The sensation was mercifully brief, but he began to feel lethargic as he took a deep breath afterward. He nearly dropped her as his vision started to blur.
Did that red dust do this?
He saw another canister of the red dust glow a soft blue.
Not again.
John sent his own Throw at the minagen tank, causing it to spiral harmlessly into a wall. He then turned toward the offending merc leader. His head began to throb in protest, but he ignored the pain. The man summoned another Throw.
The asari flew into a wall of crates behind her, slamming through the metal cases like they were tissue paper.
John felt unsteady as he recovered. The attack had taken much more out of him than usual, and his muscles were crying out with exhaustion. His shields took a minor hit as the rest of the mercs turned toward him. He felt as if he was swimming as he whirled to face them, delivering another biotic attack.
The attack was several times more potent than his usual Shockwave, leaving craters in the ground as it traveled toward and decimated the rest of the mercs.
Tali suddenly felt much heavier in John's arms, and he nearly fell over. Garrus put a steadying hand on his shoulder as Miranda rushed toward the merc leader's desk. Her voice sounded as if it came from down a long tunnel to the Spectre. "I've got it, Shepard. Samara can come with us now."
John fought the gathering darkness at the corners of his mind, willing himself to remain conscious. He reached for his radio. "Joker, get your ass over here ASAP."
"Sir, the Normandy's not cleared to dock there."
"I said come here now Joker. Spectre authority."
"Aye-aye, commander."
The Spectre began to feel lightheaded as the room around him began to spin. He focused on Tali, the only proof that the world wasn't melting around him. His lungs continued to burn as he spoke. "Miranda, send a message to Anaya. Update her on everything." He stopped to cough again. "Including the minagen and Pitne For."
"Done." Another group of mercs poured into the room through the door they had entered from. A burst of fire followed Miranda as she took cover. "They've got reinforcements."
John glowed blue as he looked at the quarian in his arms. His vision was going in and out of focus, to the point that he could barely make out the swirls on her hood. His body was starting to tremble as he sank to his knees.
I'm not strong enough for this.
He jumped as a round pinged off Tali's still-active shields. He turned, seeing an Eclipse vanguard closing the distance, shotgun at the ready.
NO!
The man lashed out at the asari with everything he had. The woman appeared to cringe for a moment, crumbling under the biotic assault.
Images flash. A salarian dies quietly, barely known. An angry young voice yells in defiance. Pride flows as she dons the yellow armor.
The asari let out a bloodcurdling scream, her form suddenly flipping backwards as if struck by a hovercar.
"What was that?" Miranda demanded. Shepard, however, had risen to his feet. His now-clear vision focused on a merc in the center of the group assaulting them.
He unleashed the same energy on the soldier, though with more purpose this time. The man, along with two others near him, dropped their weapons as they were wreathed in purple energy. Without warning, they rose into the air like puppets on a string. Their arms were held out as if they were being crucified as their screams filled the air.
A colony awakens, oblivious to the threat hidden within its own streets as he calls in the attack. His grandfather quietly polishes the rifle, a relic from his time with the hated Alliance. She winces as the asari yells a single word at her, pointing at the wretched form on the ground at their feet: "Kill!"
They crumpled to the ground, lifeless, as the energy faded.
"Good God..." the Cerberus operative whispered.
John looked at himself, noticing that a similar purple aura had covered him for a brief moment before fading. What the hell was that? He took a deep breath. I'm better. He coughed. But it's not a permanent fix. He looked past the devastation in front of him, pushing aside his distaste at what had passed through his mind. Only one thing to do now.
"Spirits..." Garrus was still dumbstruck by the display. Shepard, however, was already sprinting for the door. His arms gripped the quarian with renewed vigor.
"Keep up, and stay out of my way."
"Oh look, it's the lovely daughter of Admiral Zorah vas nedas."
"You watch your mouth!"
The Girl ignored the jibe, tugging the suit of the quarian next to her as she continued walking. "It's okay, Quala. That bosh'tet doesn't know what he's talking about." Her father's work meant that he needed to constantly consult with experts throughout the fleet as he did his research. It wasn't his fault that he was rarely stationed in his own vessel, the Alarei, for more than a week at a time. He was simply too busy to stay there.
Or with his own daughter, for that matter.
Quala interrupted her thoughts. "I'd give you a piece of my mind if she wasn't holding me back, Sanir'Tovo."
The named quarian simply laughed, the bright yellow of his suit appearing sickly in the low lighting of the liveship's maintenance deck as he nudged a soldier standing next to him. "Well look at that, Prazza'Naal. I guess I do owe you half a shift on air scrubber duty. Miss Zorah really is spineless without that marine boyfriend of hers."
The Girl visibly flinched as she continued to tug her friend away from the man and his companion. In another universe, she might have taken an interest in Kal if he had stopped referring to her as "ma'am" all the time. As it was, she considered the idea laughable. That still didn't keep her face from burning at the insinuation. "Shut up, Tovo," she growled.
"You can't silence truth, Tali'Zorah," he returned. "Especially when it concerns privileged people like you and your mother. Tell me, when was the last time you did any honest work, hyel'tet?"
The Girl's helmet hid her bared teeth as she whipped back toward him, her now-shellshocked friend forgotten. "I'm already one of the best damn techs on this fleet and you know it."
"A combat tech and hacker well-versed in theory, not an experienced engineer," the man coldly corrected, his eyes narrowing. "You're never utilized for anything other than emergencies. You don't design, build, or repair anything. Your piloting is laughable, at best. The closest you've come to the crops that keep us alive is the line in the Rayya's galley. That's without even mentioning that you've never even seen a geth, whether down the barrel of a gun or not." He stepped back to fold his arms. "Face it, your father let you and your hyel'tet mother off easy. You are nothing but a liability for us real quarians, plundering our scant resources while you wait for your one golden moment to-"
The rest of his sentence was cut off by the Girl's fist as it sank into his stomach. She didn't give him time to recover, delivering a second punch to his helmeted head. He deftly dodged the third blow, winding up a powerful punch in return. By that time, Quala had sprung into action. The young quarian attempted to tackle the much larger adult before he could strike the Girl, only succeeding in knocking him to the ground as she intercepted his blow.
The Girl made sure that her friend's charge was not in vain. She landed a few more shots on him before standing up, her attention now focused on Quala. The barely-conscious man made no effort to stop her, nor did the silent Prazza, who narrowed his eyes as the Girl pulled Quala to her feet.
"Keelah, Quala, he's twice your size! That was stupid and you know it."
The young woman laughed weakly, clutching her side. "Doesn't mean I didn't have to. I wouldn't be a very good hesh'nealan if I just stood there like him." She gave a slight nod toward Prazza, who was pulling Tovo to a sitting position.
The Girl grinned fiercely as she pulled her friend into a tight hug. "No, you definitely wouldn't."
"This changes nothing," a voice rasped. The Girl glared at the previously-defeated man, who had climbed back to his feet. "You will never be able to do anything meaningful for this fleet, hyel'tet."
The Girl crossed the room, grasping a fistful of the man's suit as she looked him dead in the eye. "Spacing you sure sounds like it would be a favor to the universe."
"Tali'Zorah!"
The Girl cringed as she released Tovo. The four of them turned to face the speaker: a very angry Admiral Shala'Raan vas Tonbay. Her eyes were locked on the Girl as she excused the others.
"Quala, go back to your quarters. You two can go back to your stations." It was not a request. "Tali, come with me."
The Girl bowed her head as she obeyed her surrogate-aunt. The next several minutes were a blur as the admiral led her down the corridors of the Rayya. Tovo's last words haunted her as she blindly followed Raan.
"Shala, I wasn't expecting a visit."
The Girl immediately fell out of her stupor, gazing in surprise at the speaker. "Father? When did you come aboard?"
Raan shushed her with a stern gaze. "Tali was in another conflict with Sanir'Tovo. I caught her fighting him down in the service corridor this time."
"He was talking about Moth-" The Girl was cut off by a smack to the back of her head. Not strong enough to daze or unbalance her, but still powerful enough to get the message across.
"Silence, Tali. There's no excuse for that kind of behavior."
Rael'Zorah stepped away from a nearby terminal to look at his daughter. His voice was calm and analytical as he addressed Raan. "Was she injured?"
The Girl shook her head as the other admiral answered. "No, but I'm surprised that Tovo and Quala were in good enough shape to avoid a visit to the hospital wing."
"She fought Quala too?" He asked the question as if it was no more important than what size wrench was needed for a repair.
"No, poor girl helped Tali at one point. She's lucky Tovo's blow wasn't intended for her."
Rael nodded and turned back to the terminal. "Sounds like everything's perfectly fine, Shala."
"What?" the two women said simultaneously.
"She successfully proved her physical prowess against an enemy, and her friend escaped no worse for the wear." An orange light shone from the terminal as he walked up to it. "Tali did everything she needed to."
"Keelah, this isn't you and Gerrel defying orders to save a ship Rael. This is your daughter we're talking about!"
The man was unfazed by Raan's outburst. "She will be a great asset for our cause someday, Raan. That much is clear."
"Not while she's starting fights with anyone she disagrees with, Rael. You must know that."
"She did what she had to do. Nothing else matters."
The Girl found herself distracted as the admirals continued to argue. Tovo's words again leaped to the forefront of her mind, causing her to mouth the hated syllables silently to herself.
"You will never be able to do anything useful for this fleet, hyel'tet."
She knew there was only one way to prove him wrong.
"I need a ship."
The Girl's soft voice startled Shala'Raan. "What did you say, Tali?"
"I need a ship," she repeated, with more confidence this time. "Because I'm starting my pilgrimage."
Raan's demeanor did a complete 180 as her eyes flashed. "But Tali, you've still got two years before you have to start your pilgrimage."
The Girl shook her head. "No, it has to be now."
"Just like her old man," Rael chuckled, ignorant to the concern in Raan's voice. "Shala, can you make the preparations? I need to finish this study."
"But Rael, she's not-"
"I'm ready, Auntie Raan."
Raan met the Girl's eyes. The determination in her voice prompted a sigh from the admiral. "I will get everything in order."
The Girl spared a last look at Rael as they turned to leave. The man was furiously typing away at the terminal, dead to the world around him. "Goodbye, Father."
The man remained silent as the doors closed.
"Why, Tali?"
The Girl looked down at her hands, which had engaged each other in their own private thumb war. "It's just something I have to do."
Raan saw right through her evasion. "You don't have to prove anything to Tovo, you know."
"It's not him I'm worried about."
Raan nodded as she embraced the younger quarian. "Just promise me you'll stay safe, Tali."
The Girl closed her eyes and patted Raan's back, wishing that she could. "I'll do my best."
"I guess that's all I can hope for," the woman breathed as she released her. "There's something I must give you, before you go."
Raan reached into one of the deeper pockets on her toolbelt, pulling out a long package that had seen better days. A white and blue handle gleamed through a portion of the wrappings.
"This..." The Girl trailed off as she carefully grasped the box. She didn't need to open it to know what was within. "This was my mother's."
The admiral nodded. "Laenya would have wanted you to have it, Tali. Her mother gave it to her when she started on her own pilgrimage."
The Girl choked back a tear. There were no words to express her gratitude. She finally found her voice again. "I need to talk to Quala before I go."
"I understand. A vessel will be waiting by bay seven when you're ready."
"Thanks Auntie Raan. For everything."
"Keelah se'lai, Tali'Zorah nar Rayya."
Samara stood on the docking ramp as a ship pulled in. The sleek craft was impressive, especially considering the humanity's youth in the eyes of the other species.
As if on cue, a trio of figures rushed toward her position. The leader, a human, was carrying a quarian in his arms. Shepard looks almost dead on his feet, the Justicar observed. "Shepard, how bad was your dose?"
The human shook his head, as if trying to stay awake. "She needs help more than I do." He gingerly lifted the quarian a little higher. "Help me get her to the med bay."
Her injuries are severe. Samara could tell from the thin layer of red dust on her suit that she had been exposed to minagen as well. "The antidote that Anaya gave me will not work for dextro species."
The others rushed into the decontamination chamber as Shepard stood the quarian upright, supporting her weight on his shoulder. "Doctor Solus can figure it out."
The justicar grasped the quarian's opposite arm without comment, taking some of the weight off of the Spectre. Shepard pointed the way toward an elevator, directing Samara as they rushed through the ship. The five of them traveled down a level.
"Keelah!"
The quarian regained consciousness as the doors opened. She nearly wriggled out of Samara's grip as they guided her to another door. A pair of medics, one salarian and the other human, stood at the ready.
"Careful," Shepard grunted as they laid her on the exam table, "Her arm is broken."
The human doctor's eyes widened as she looked at the pitiful sight before her. "Dear God... Mordin, I need twelve suit patches. Quickly!"
"Shepard will need medical attention as well," the asari informed as the doctors went to work sealing the suit.. "He and the quarian were poisoned. I have an antidote, but it would be toxic to dextro species." She drew a syringe that Anaya had given her.
The human doctor reached for the syringe and waved toward the commander. He shook his head. "No, you need to use it to make a cure for her first. I'll be fine in the mean-"
"Damn it!" The quarian flashed blue as a bolt of energy flashed from her uninjured arm. Several medical instruments on a counter nearby floated into the air right as the salarian finished the last patch.
"Suit compromises sealed," he announced as the human doctor rushed over to the offending arm, which was shaking uncontrollably. "Should prevent further infection."
"Help me strap her down," the other doctor pleaded. "We can't risk her doing that again."
"Understood. Pain and toxin causing uncontrolled spasms. Correcting."
"Watch out for her left arm," the justicar offered as she held the quarian's legs still.
"Suit patches holding," the salarian announced as they finished binding her. "Multiple entry wounds in abdomen, left leg, left arm. Need to download diagnostic data from suit, ensure section seals are not compromised."
The commander's other companions began to argue as Samara glanced at Shepard. The man hadn't walked away unscathed, his armor pockmarked with dents from his recent firefight. He slowly approached the operating table as the argument reached a crescendo.
"I consider it lucky that the commander's even breathing right now, Vakarian. Once again, no thanks to her."
She does have a point, she thought as she viewed the scene.
The salarian cut in before it could continue. "Enough! Must insist upon silence. Will need to decontaminate room in order to proceed. Please leave."
"Go on, Commander," the human doctor stated as the other two soldiers left. " Let Mordin and me help her." Samara reinforced their point by placing a hand on his shoulder.
I wonder if...
"Tali..." he mumbled, oblivious to the justicar.
The quarian's eyes settled on him as a moan escaped her lips. "Johnnnaaaaaugh!"
The room erupted into pandemonium as the quarian glowed blue. Before any of them could react, Shepard had been Thrown against the opposing wall. The doctors rushed to sedate the quarian as Samara pulled the commander to his feet. I must know.
"Shepard, look at me," she ordered. To her relief, he was still lucid enough to obey. "I have an important question for you. Nod if you understand."
He obliged.
"After you inhaled the minagen, did you use a biotic power you hadn't before? One that had a purple energy?"
He nodded. This is... troubling.
Before he could protest, the justicar swiped the syringe with the cure off the counter. His eyes went wide as she pressed it into his skin.
But it's kept him alive at least.
"Do not worry, there's still enough for the doctors to work with. I must perform an oath of fealty to you, to ensure that I won't have to choose between your orders and the Code."
"Just hurry with that defibrillator, Mordin. Commander, you need to leave." The human doctor was rapidly pumping the quarian's chest, trying to buy time for the salarian.
"Indeed. Shepard, we must find somewhere vacant to perform the Oath."
An electronic voice came out of numerous speakers at once. "The starboard observation deck is vacant, if you wish for isolated quarters. It is to your left as you exit the medical bay."
An AI? She looked at the Spectre again as she considered the Code. He is in poor health and I am providing care for him while the doctors are occupied. That will suffice until the Oath is complete.
Samara walked Shepard to the indicated room, laying him carefully on one of the nearby couches as she knelt before him. His eyes began to close as she spoke.
"By the Code, I will serve you, Shepard."
John sat up, looking for Samara, for the doctors, for anyone who can say if Tali is alright.
There was only White.
The sound of clapping echoed through the space. "Bravo, commander."
He turned, seeing Kaiden Alenko walking toward him. The dead soldier beamed at him. "I knew you could do the impossible, but fighting like that while poisoned... And don't get me started with Haestrom."
"Is Tali safe?"
The man's smile was dialed down a notch, a secret hidden behind his eyes. "She'll recover. You got her to the docs in time."
John breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness. I just..." He closed his eyes for a moment and gestured at nothing in particular. "I don't want her to end up here."
"I understand, commander," the ghost replied softly.
"I'm just glad I could save her." He took a deep breath and continued, "After a fight like that..."
Kaiden's smile slipped a little more as he trailed off. John noticed the sadness in his eyes this time. "She is safe now, right?"
Kaiden looked to the side, as if worried someone was watching. "I can't say much on that. Only that you've done well so far."
"Is she safe or not?" John demanded, his own eyes pleading with the dead man.
A sigh, then, "It won't let me give any details, commander." The lieutenant gave a sad shake of his head. "It's not like I don't want to, I just... can't."
As if reinforcing his point, a Red presence made itself known. It focused on the Spectre, bringing forth a primal fear unlike any he had ever felt. Shepard could sense an insatiable hunger as the Red pulled at him. Kaiden stepped between them, shielding him. The Red vanished, the Spectre still very much whole.
John slumped down, crestfallen. The two gazed off in silence for a time before he spoke again. "I thought about what you said last time. 'You have to save her so she can save you.'" He looked up at Kaiden. "Is it wrong if I don't care about being saved?"
The lieutenant looked confused. "Sir?"
"That Eclipse base, Haestrom, that time we got ambushed by husks on that derelict freighter... Heck, the alley by Chora's Den on the Citadel. I've been coming to her rescue ever since I met her." The soldier gave a long exhale. "Don't get me wrong, it's not like I mind helping her or anything. I just..." John trailed off, at a loss for words.
Kaiden placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, prompting him to continue.
"I feel like it just isn't enough," John continued. "I never wanted this for Tali. I mean, she was so innocent back when I met her. So happy, and full of wonder. She had lived a normal life for a quarian back then. Her father is an admiral, sure, but she had earned so much for herself- her dedication, her astonishing tech abilities, her selfless drive to help her people." He fell silent as he stared off into the White.
"Her only legacy now is playing princess in a castle for a Spectre who can't seem to keep her safe. And all because she stumbled onto a recording of a traitor while on her pilgrimage." John shook his head sadly. "I can't help but feel like, somehow, I'm part of the worst thing that could happen to her."
Kaiden spoke up, "You're wrong, commander."
"What?"
"Time and space, they're not the same here. But I can still see things. Her mother dying before her time, for instance."
Shepard shrugged. "She didn't like to talk about that on the original Normandy."
"Her father being distant with her, to the point that he doesn't talk to her about anything other than her salvaging parts and data on the geth?"
"She told me he was very work-oriented. A lot of parents are like that."
"The fact that she searched aimlessly for four years on her pilgrimage before meeting you. How she found items that would have easily earned any other quarian passage onto the ship of their choosing. She had to pass them all up because they weren't worthy enough for an admiral's daughter."
John raised an eyebrow. "We touched on the subject, but she didn't say it was that long."
"What about the Admiralty Board that sent her with a trigger-happy, inexperienced, and disloyal squad to deal with an unknown situation? Who then tossed her straight back into the fire on a geth-controlled world for a worthless mission with a bunch of defenseless scientists and only a handful of soldiers to protect them?"
"I chalked those up to bad luck," the Spectre said. He gave a bittersweet laugh. "That and, you know, politicians."
"That may be more true than you think, but that's not the point I'm trying to make." He waited for the Spectre to look at him before he continued. "My point is her life's been anything but normal. And ever since you entered it, you've been one of the only good things she's had." The dead soldier grasped his shoulder, more firmly this time. "You're the only one strong enough to protect her from the ones who should have helped her all along. And that is something I can tell you."
John smiled weakly. "Thanks Kaiden, but I'm still worried about her."
The White slowly dissolves around him as he spares a last glance at his friend. Kaiden grinned as he vanished in a flash of light.
"Tali's tougher than she looks."
Tali slowly awoke, her body not wanting to shift from its comfortable position. She felt a bit colder than usual, but dismissed the feeling. I'll worry about the suit temp later. She stirred a little, her limbs feeling stiff. I wonder why it feels so... soft. And my head... She felt a minor headache, similar to the morning after her day sharing drinks with Kasumi. She lifted her right hand toward her forehead. I didn't let myself get drunk ag-
She paused, her hand feeling not the expected solid glass of her visor.
Her hand felt skin and hair.
Memories instantly flooded into her mind. Tali bolted upright as her eyes jumped open. She immediately regretted the latter action, as her vision was overloaded by the light in the room. The nearly-blinded quarian yelped as she covered her eyes.
An artificial, yet feminine voice chimed up. "My apologies, Tali'Zorah. I was aware quarians were naturally nocturnal, but there was little data on the extranet regarding the extent of your species' sensitivity to light." The flat electronic tone did little to convince her of the machine's sincerity. "I have dimmed the lights significantly to accommodate you better."
Damn bosh'tet AI. Tali opened her eyes, though much slower this time. "There's a reason our visors are so dark, EDI."
"Noted. I have forwarded a message to Doctor Chakwas so she can take the appropriate precautions."
The quarian looked around, noticing that the room had gone to the opposite extreme; she could barely see beyond her hands. "You can make it a little brighter. Just do it slowly."
"Tell me when to stop."
Slowly, the lighting rose back to a comfortable level for the quarian. It was a far cry from how bright it was when she had awoken, but she could now view her surroundings clearly. "That's enough, EDI." She stopped to examine the room she was in. Several electronic consoles towered around the room, though she could tell that they were not of a medical nature. They hummed with energy as she looked on. She could see a low dais at the far end of the room, its purpose a mystery. A privacy curtain stood next to the bed. The opaque sheet was undoubtedly obscuring the doorway. She could see a ladder sunk into the floor near the curtain, though the hatch it led through was sealed. "Where am I?"
"You're in the AI core room, adjacent to the med bay," EDI elaborated. "The ladder you see leads to a service corridor into the engineering subdeck. However, I have sealed the emergency bulkheads there to help preserve the sterile environment."
"How is it clean anyway?" the quarian asked, curious.
"Commander Shepard requested additional medical sterilizers for several rooms onboard while on Illium. The other rooms currently equipped with them are the medical bay, Mordin's lab, the crew quarters, both restrooms, the life support maintenance area, and the captain's quarters." The AI paused for a quarter-second. "I believe he expected something like this to happen."
Tali nodded as she looked back at her ungloved hands. Her pale lavender skin felt surprisingly smooth without the rubberized gauntlets she usually wore. She stroked a finger from her right hand down the back of her left, stopping just above the wrist. The rest of her arm was bound in a cast. "How badly was I injured?"
"You had two broken bones in your arm, as well as several shrapnel wounds along your left side. They also had to neutralize the effects of your exposure to minagen-X3," the AI dutifully reported.
"And how long was I unconscious?"
"Eight days, sixteen hours, forty-two minutes."
The quarian grunted an acknowledgement as she examined the rest of her clothing. She was dressed in a loose fabric, one she remembered was called a "hospital gown". While the garment covered most of her form, she felt far from secure in it.
As if hearing her thoughts, a part of her garment stirred behind her as she felt an icy blast along her back.
"Keelah!" she yelped, leaping to her feet as she prepared to strike whoever had dared to invade her privacy with her uninjured hand.
A metal device whirred innocently next to the wall, pivoting from side to side.
"I recommended that an air-conditioning fan was installed after you were moved here," EDI explained. "Temperatures in this room can exceed sixty degrees Celsius depending on how 'active' I am."
No wonder Garrus always complained about wind. The quarian shook her head and warily considered the AI's statement. At least it isn't going to cook me alive, she thought sardonically as she slowly moved back to the bed.
She still felt very exposed. "Why am I wearing this?"
"Your sh'rayan took extensive damage during the mission on Illium. Doctor Solus and Operative Taylor have been working to repair and upgrade it while you were unconscious."
Tali was surprised to hear the proper term for her species' environment suits. Funny, my translator never gets it- Her eyes widened as she was hit with an epiphany. "Wait, are you speaking to me in Khelish?"
"Yes," EDI replied. "Between extranet references and the knowledge of Justicar Samara, I was able to learn the language fairly quickly. I find that it improves crew efficiency by up to five percent when I address them in their native tongue."
Now it's learning my language? If EDI starts calling me its 'hesh'nealan', I'm deactivating it no matter what Miranda says.
The quarian cleared her throat. "Has anything happened while I was unconscious?"
"We have been tracking a missing survey crew through the Attican Traverse. Commander Shepard is currently groundside at a Prothean dig site on planet Kopis."
"Interesting," the quarian wondered aloud. "I'll have to ask him about that."
"If you like, I can have him visit once he's back on the Normandy."
"Really?" The quarian's voice dropped as she considered the offer. "I could get sick. And he might not like to see me in this state." Even so, her heart leaped at the prospect. She blinked, her next words coming in a whisper that even EDI had trouble detecting. "He'd see my skin."
Tali's cheeks flushed as she looked in horror at her hands and feet. "He'll see my skin!" she screeched, trying frantically to hide them in her gown. My face! She searched for something, anything to cover herself, nearly tripping as she scurried around the room.
The AI was silent for a full three seconds.
"That is not what I meant. Allowing a visitor inside for an extended period would put an unnecessary strain on your immune system." The quarian stopped trying to squeeze herself into a narrow gap between two of EDI's mainframes. "An audio-only link would suffice, especially given that your omni-tool is embedded in your sh'rayan."
"Oh," the now thoroughly-embarrassed quarian said. "Yes, I would like that." She extricated herself from the tight enclosure. "There's something else I have to ask you about first though."
"Ready."
Tali nervously wondered how to word what she was going to request. Having her sh'rayan had meant she hadn't needed to ask the question in years. Her thoughts flashed to a memory of a brief conversation with Ashley Williams on the original Normandy. She looked down at her hands, which she was wringing nervously.
"EDI, is there somewhere I can... I believe the human term is... 'do my business'?"
"There is a bed pan under the cot."
Tali tilted her head in confusion. Though the words had been spoken in perfect Khelish, her mind had no answer for what the coupled yet very different nouns meant.
"A what?"
John climbed out of the M-44 Hammerhead, landing on the floor of the Normandy's docking bay.
"Always fun breaking a few flashlights, eh commander?"
Zaeed had already pressed the button for the elevator, and was waiting for him and Garrus to come over.
"Hah, that was nothing, Zaeed," the turian quipped as the elevator arrived. "Now Feros, that was a good bit of fun. Thorian plant-zombies excluded of course."
Shepard grinned as he stepped in, pressing the button for the CIC. "At least we didn't come out empty-handed this time." He pulled the Prothean sphere out of his pocket. The silvery orb hovered just above his hand. "No idea what it's for, but it does do this-" He poked it with one of his fingers, causing its surface to expand and contract. It also gave off a low humming noise.
Garrus folded his arms. "While I can't deny the wow factor, it doesn't seem to be all that useful."
John shrugged as he pocketed the device. "I'll hold on to it. Not like the Illusive Man will think it's 'important to humanity's survival' anyway."
The three of them shared a laugh as the elevator door opened, much sooner than they had expected. The trio was nonplussed as Zaeed stepped out. "Since when is the elevator this fast?"
The EDI terminal in front of him flickered to life. "Engineers Daniels and Donnelly applied an upgrade suggested by Tali'Zorah after finishing trials with the new cyclonic barriers. The elevator now operates at three times its former speed."
Garrus snorted with amusement. "At least that's another point against Miranda."
"Shepard," the AI continued, "She has regained consciousness. If you'd like, you can-"
"Garrus, crew deck, now!" John interrupted.
The turian shifted one of his brow plates. "Yes sir."
Shepard nearly ran over Doctor Chakwas in his haste to reach the med-bay. "Sorry doctor."
"No need, commander. I don't usually leave the office for lunch."
"No worries." His foot began to shift, betraying his desire to get past her.
Chakwas noticed the cue. "I won't hold you up any longer, Commander. Just use my terminal there and EDI will do the rest."
He gave a grateful nod as he moved to the doctor's chair. The door quietly shut itself as Chakwas left. "EDI," he asked as he sat down, "Is she ready?"
"One moment, Shepard."
Tali paced nervously across the room. The isolation was starting to get to her, and the wait felt been far too long. I wonder when he will be back, she thought. EDI didn't give me a timefra-
The AI's avatar sprang to life. The glowing blue orb startled the quarian, but EDI had been slowly increasing the ambient lighting in the room during the wait. By that time, Tali's eyes had adjusted enough that the image wouldn't hurt her eyes.
"Commander Shepard is requesting to speak to you."
"Put him on," she said, crossing to the terminal.
A soft tone played from it as the avatar vanished. "John, are you there?"
The Spectre breathed a sigh of relief, noticing how different her voice sounded without the suit. "Tali, you don't know how good it is to hear from you."
Get a hold of yourself, Tali. He's just... glad you're alive. Her cheeks warmed a little despite her attempted reality-check. "I can say the same. Having only an AI for company..." She paused to look at the hardware around her, which housed EDI's "brain". "Let's just say I'm a little uncomfortable with it."
After her experience with the geth, I don't blame her. "It's only temporary. Chakwas says you'll get out tomorrow."
"I never thought I'd say this, but I prefer my suit to being stuck in here." She crossed her arms, trying to keep herself warm. The fan was doing its job a little too well for her tastes. "Do you know when Jacob and Mordin will be done fixing it?"
"They should be done by dinner tonight."
"Should I expect any surprises when I get it back?" Her eyes narrowed.
John knew what she meant. "I made sure Miranda wasn't allowed around it. Even she won't refuse a direct order." Not after what happened last time she tried, he quietly thought before continuing. "I let Jacob add some armor-plated reinforcements though. I had Mordin oversee it so Cerberus couldn't throw in any listening devices."
I thought that sounded odd, Mordin helping the armory officer. "I appreciate the gesture. Still, I can't wait til I can come out."
He grinned a little. "You know you could could come out here to the med bay if you want. I could run the sterilizer in this room too," he jested.
She glanced longingly at the door. A hint of a smile played at the corner of her lips as an unbidden fantasy flashed through her mind. Getting to feel those arms of his would almost be worth getting sick...
...And those abs...
...And his che- She stopped, her imagination stamping a huge scar across his chest.
One that she had given him.
"Sorry John," she said with a shake of her head. "It's not that I don't want to. It's just..." Tali trailed off.
She must be worried about how she looks. "Feeling a little self-conscious?"
Tali nodded, before remembering that John couldn't see her. "Among other things."
"Like your immune system?"
She closed her eyes. "Let's just say it's safer this way." Tali was glad he couldn't read her thoughts.
John was mildly surprised as he felt a glimmer of hope in him die. Well what were you expecting, anyway? It's not like she can spontaneously strengthen her immune system.
He decided to change the subject. "How's your arm feeling?"
She tested her wrist, rotating it as much as she could with the cast. "It doesn't hurt, and it looks like I've got most of my movement back. I'm surprised Chakwas hasn't had me on painkillers though, all things considered."
John remembers how she'd dropped into cardiac arrest the last time they had dosed her with a depressant. "It didn't seem like a good idea to put you on more meds. I... We were worried you wouldn't wake up for a while there."
Tali noticed the accidental "I", giving her imagination another fuel source. She silently wished she could lay her head on something other than EDI's mainframes or her fan-chilled pillow.
Preferably, something roughly the same size, shape, and texture as John's shoulder...
The scar invaded her thoughts again, causing her to shudder. "You weren't... hurt too badly, were you?"
"No," he said with a hint of surprise. "Aside from the minagen poisoning, I was still in pretty good shape."
"Even after I..." She could remember blue light, an unbridled power that threatened to tear her apart, and pain.
Not all of it had been her own.
"I've faced stronger biots than a barely-conscious quarian," he said, trying to lighten the mood. "You didn't break anything valuable."
Tali exhaled. "I was worried that I had hurt y-"
"You didn't."
"Or that you'd be mad at-"
"I'm not."
She sighed. "I just want to say that I'm sor-"
"I forgive you."
She buried her face in her hands. I know he's trying to make me feel better, but this isn't helping. She took a calming breath. "Can you please stop interrupting me?"
One-Mississippi, two-Mississippi, he counted after she had finished. "I'm all ears."
Humans have the weirdest sayings, she thought as a much less suggestive image came to mind. "Anyway..."
She gulped nervously. "I was afraid... After I was hit, I was in so much pain. It was like... my body was turning against me. And then it started using biotics..."
John wished that he could put a comforting hand on her shoulder.
She held herself tighter and shivered, looking down at her feet. "It scared me. I scared me. I had all that power, and no idea how to control it..."
He nodded, his thoughts flashing through a series of memories: accidentally Lifting himself after sparring with Jacob... Tali backing away from him when he told her of his new abilities on Freedom's Progress...
That mysterious energy...
Truth be told, he hadn't tried using that power again. Something about it had just felt so wrong. Samara had strongly recommended against it, at least until she could see his biotic abilities firsthand.
He had no desire to go against her wishes.
Noticing Tali's silence, he felt it was okay to intervene. "It spooked me when I found out Cerberus made me a biotic too. All that time spent being... I guess you could say 'normal'. And then I had the rug ripped out from under me..."
She looked back up at the terminal, then silently cursed. Damn this lack of video, she thought, despite her unsuited state.
"I remember that day. I remember making my rounds like usual. I remember the explosion, and drifting away. I remember..." ...Thinking of you. How amazing you were.
How I felt like I'd made the wrong choice.
He took a deep breath. Now isn't the time for that.
"Telling Liara to go to the escape pod," he finished.
Tali cringed when she heard the name.
"Everything between then and a few weeks ago, it felt like nothing had happened. If someone had told me I'd been blackout drunk and gotten in a barfight, I would've believed them. Instead..."
Tali's mind filed in the rest. ...It was two years later, everyone thought you were gone, and only Cerberus had listened to you. It brought a tear to her eye, trying to imagine his predicament.
"I had no idea it was that hard on you."
He gave a single humorless laugh. "Even if I hadn't been dead for two years, I still would've been traumatized by being turned into a biotic against my will. I'd say you handled it pretty well."
"John, you don't have to lie to me for my sake."
"I'm not," he laughed, a genuine one this time. "Miranda told me I nearly destroyed a lab when I started to wake up, and that was before they were even done... Fixing me, so to speak." His smirk returns to his face. "It's a good thing I found a friendly visor on Freedom's Progress, or I might have gone mad."
She found herself grinning. "I guess I'll have to try harder next time something gives me biotics. Maybe I could mess with Garrus's calibrations a little before it wears off."
"Not that I wouldn't want front row seats for that show, but I'd prefer not to have anyone on my crew poisoned again," John replied with a smile.
"True." Her hands shifted. "There is something else I wanted to say though." Tali noticed that she had fallen back into her tell, and willed her hands to sit still. "Provided I won't get interrupted again."
"Wouldn't dream of it."
"About what happened... in Liara's office, I mean... I wanted to apologize." Unable to resist her vice any longer, her hands began to rub together. "It was rude of me... and stupid... I mean, she deserved better. Even if I didn't like what she asked from you... She was part of the crew once... and on top of that, she's your... your..." She couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence, just as a part of her still refused to believe Garrus's words from earlier.
"Liara and and I aren't together anymore."
Tali's heart skipped a beat, then a second one. It almost forgot about the third one as well before working normally again. "What?"
"She and I aren't a couple anymore. Things... changed between us."
"I'm sorry to hear that." She knew it was a lie, albeit a necessary one. A part of her actually felt like singing, though she didn't dare attempt to do so without her sh'rayan and its convenient ability to mute her voice.
"If you don't mind me asking," she said, curious, "Why?"
Because of you, his mind immediately answered, but he held his tongue. The memory of her hurried exit when they had gotten close in the shuttle bay was still fresh in his mind. Doubt filled him, and his reasonable side latched on to it. It wouldn't be right to put her on the spot like that.
Her sense of boldness was failing her as the silence dragged on. Keelah, that was stupid. I shouldn't have put him on the spot like that. I should just apolo-"
"We grew apart," he stated as he shut his eyes. "It wouldn't have been the same if we tried." It was as much of the truth as he dared to give her.
"Oh." It hadn't been an answer that she was expecting.
He remembered the last moments he had spent in the asari's office. He watches the quarian storm out of the room, his eyes lingering a moment too long on her form as he clumsily tried to excuse himself. He stumbles over his words, his mind a confused mess as he tries to determine which had been more real: the disastrous kiss minutes before or the flustered quarian rushing away to the Normandy's elevator. The asari gives him a knowing look, despite the tear her eye refuses to shed. "Does she know?" He is unsure how to answer.
"You can say that again."
He sounds so troubled, she thought sadly. I wish I could put him at ease.
He sighs, his thoughts focused once again on their moment in the shuttle. I wish I could hold her like that again.
John gazed wistfully at the door to the AI core room. If only I knew what had been troubling her.
If only I could trust myself around him. In spite of the thought, she looked longingly toward privacy curtain shielding the door from her view.
His eyes settle on the interface, which glowed a defiant red. I wish this damn door-
-wasn't between us. Tali shook her head. "So what have you been up to lately, John?" She silently cursed; it had sounded much more professional in her mind.
He chuckled slightly. "Remember the mako?"
"How could I forget? You always made a point of finding the roughest path possible with that thing. I nearly got a concussion from when you crashed it on the Citadel."
"In my defense, the Conduit is to blame for the fact that we landed upside down. But that's besides the point. I found a replacement."
Her eyes narrowed. "If you think you're getting me into another one of those-"
"It's a gyroscopically-stable hovertank," he interrupted. "Physically impossible to flip, roll, or encounter turbulence due to rough terrain. Besides, nobody's better at repairing tech on the fly than you."
"So you admit your driving is dangerous," she jabbed, though she was flattered by his compliment.
"I plead the Fifth."
"What?"
"Sorry, old human reference. Anyway, the designers of the vehicle neglected to install shields."
Tali facepalmed in frustration. What bosh'tet would overlook something like that in this day and age? "Fine, I'll go with you next time the mission needs this... What is it called?"
"Hammerhead."
"Yes, the Haaaammerhead," she yawned. She blushed as she covered her mouth. "Oh dear."
He couldn't help but grin at her slip-up. "You should get your rest, Tali. Captain's orders."
Damn. Though she was starting to enjoy the direction their talk was going, she had to admit he was right. "Will do, John. Talk to you later?"
"Of course."
Her hand moved toward the control to end the communication.
"And Tali."
She paused. "Yes, John?"
"You have a beautiful voice. It's nice to hear it without the mask for a change."
Her hand slammed down on the console, ending the connection before she could say anything else.
Damn it, John thought as he made his way back to the mess hall.
Tali attached her mask, a light indicating that the pressure seals were once again in place and working properly. The visor's auto-shading immediately activated, darkening her vision to her saved settings. The suit's diagnostics started running, verifying that the various systems and programs within were running smoothly.
Did it always make this much of a difference?
She dismissed the thought as she opened the door, walking out into the well-lit med bay. Jacob and Mordin stood there waiting. "I hope the modifications are to your liking," the soldier stated.
As if triggered by his statement, the diagnostics finished. A bright white display suddenly materialized in front of her right eye. "Keelah!" she yelped, closing the eye. The hologram mirrored itself in response, fixing itself over her left eye instead. She slammed that one shut as well. "What the hell did you do Jacob?"
"I installed a targeting visor. They're standard a for all helmeted Cerberus personne-"
"I'm NOT a part of Cerberus, you bosh'tet!"
She heard Mordin's voice. "Expected as much. Mister Taylor had compelling argument however. More accuracy, adapts to weapons and user. Very useful tool."
"My primary weapon is a shotgun," she growled angrily as she opened her omni-tool. "I'll do fine without it thank you."
"Recommend against that. Required root access, command priority to install." The salarian inhaled deeply. "Troublesome to remove."
For anyone else, maybe. The quarian deftly navigated through the menus on her omni-tool, her eyes still closed.
"Where'd it go?"
The quarian opened her eyes at Jacob's statement. Sure enough, the offending interface had vanished, replaced by a small indicator in the corner of her mask.
"Safe-mode reboot?" the salarian queried. Tali nodded, her fingers becoming a blur as she worked to eliminate all traces of the program. "Astonishing..." he breathed. Jacob was staring wide-eyed as menus, readouts, and hacking interfaces whizzed by on her omni-tool, much too fast for him to decipher. Mordin had no such trouble. "Hidden runtimes within code. Trackers, audio recording suite, lie detector, facial scanner. Programs to track extranet usage, emotional pheromones, changes in body mass, control filtering systems, construct visual of surroundings using ultrasonic sonar. Underhanded, but brilliant ruse. STG work rarely included monitoring so thorough. Would make Shadow Broker jealous of information provided."
"I had no idea..." the slackjawed soldier said.
"Don't worry about it," Tali replied, her task complete. "It's not your fault Miranda doesn't trust me."
Notes from the author:
Wait, you lost me during the Tali/Shep talk. Who said/thought what now?
I tried having all the Tali parts underlined through the whole section, but the site wasn't saving the formatting properly (whole paragraphs kept getting reverted to non-underlining at random when saved).
For example: "'I plead the Fifth.' 'What?' 'Sorry, old human reference.'"
"I wish this damn door wasn't between us." was how I originally intended to have that particular stream of thoughts written, to show that they had the same thought at the same time.
When it came down to it, having to try and rewrite that part without underlining help (or bold font *shudder*) sounded better than having about 70% of Tali's parts underlined and the rest looking like a toss-up between the two.
Who the heck is Quala'Oro?
Shame on you, you should know by now! OC used by permission from Levi Matthews' Finding a Way. Read it or [insert detestable fate here].
Khelish-English cheat sheet:
nedas = "nowhere"
(Credit to ME wiki)
hyel'tet = "unfixable thing"/useless one; an extreme insult when directed at other quarians; comparable to c**t in offensiveness
hesh'nealan = [direct ranslation redacted. Mwuhahaa!]; a term of endearment given to one's most trusted non-romantic friends and protectors
(Credit to Herr Wozzeck and his Mass Vexations series for this one. A great SI/AU saga that's worth a look or twelve.)
sh'rayan = [translation redacted 2: the unnecessary cash-in sequel]; the proper name for the quarian environment suit