Chapter 10

Nathalie sat perfectly straight in the chair. Her mother would constantly remind her that good posture was a sign of good breeding and as a result she was incapable of slouching. She watched with detached curiosity as her father took the stand. He too sat straight and in a clear and loud voice stated his name for the record. She only half-listened as the adept Mr. Young led her father through the laundry list of her failings. Having heard him describe his disappointment in her for so many years, it barely even registered when he told the court that she wasn't dependable, was a poor example and should never have had children in the first place.

Alexis rose and began her cross-examination. Nathalie knew that very little would come of it. No matter how despicable her parents were, and they were overachievers in that department, they had lived a public life beyond reproach. There was no dirt to be had, no scandal to be uncovered. A side by side comparison would inevitably show that she was the lesser parent and that her children would be better off with them.

"Mr. Harder - do you love your daughter?" Alexis asked.

"Pardon me?"

"Do you love your daughter?" she removed her glasses.

"My daughter has made it very difficult to be involved in her life and she is a poor role model."

"Thank you but that isn't what I asked you. Do you love your daughter?"

He looked at Alexis and shifted his gaze to Nathalie. "No" he said clearly.

"Did you ever love your daughter?"

"Your line of questioning is not relevant" he countered.

Alexis crossed her arms and smirked. "Mr. Harder, you can be a witness or you can be a lawyer but you can't be both at the same time. Did you ever love your daughter?"

"When she was deserving of it."

"Deserving?" Alexis questioned. "And is that what you plan on doing to your grandchildren if you are awarded custody - make them jump through hoops to prove they deserve your love?"

"Not at all" he shook his head. "Once we get the children away from her negative influence, they will be filled with love and guidance, everything a child needs to succeed."

In an effort to get him to break, Alexis peppered him with further questions but he was too experienced and too sure of himself to slip up. Finished with her questioning, the judge adjourned the court until the next morning when he would meet with Grace in chambers. Nathalie stood as the judge exited and smoothed her skirt. Turning, she followed Alexis out a side door. Nikolas followed behind.

xxxxx

Patrick held Robin's hand tightly as they walked along the docks. "Where's your head at?" Robin asked quietly.

"Drew had told me that Nat came from a messed up family and they had done some damage to her - her parents didn't come to her wedding - but I had no idea that it was like that."

"Her father is hateful - can you imagine admitting in open court that you don't love your child?" Patrick shook his head. "Did you want to go see her tonight?"

"No" he said quietly. "I think she needs more of what Nik can offer than me - I'll spend some time with her tomorrow." Stopping, he looked at his watch. "Would you mind if we asked my dad to come for dinner tonight?"

Robin stroked his arm. "Not at all."

"We should ask Brenda too" he added. "After hearing the ambassador go on in court today, I'd like us to just be with the people we love."

Lifting his hand to her mouth, Robin kissed it. "Sounds like a great plan. Let me pick up Rian from daycare and I'll call Bren and Noah and you can figure out what we eat."

"Okay." He cupped her face and pulled her lips into his. "I love you Robin and I love our son and there is nothing either one of you could do to change that."

She smiled as she returned his kiss. "Right back at you"

xxxxx

"Are you going to speak to me at all?" Nikolas asked as he watched Nathalie move food around on her plate.

The car ride from the courtroom had been silent. Nikolas had reached for her hand and while she had let him take it, she hadn't returned his squeeze. He had been in the room as she tried to prepare Grace for her appearance before the judge tomorrow but as every conversation had lately, it ended with the little girl telling her mother that she hated her. Nathalie had tried everything since New Year's Eve - negotiation, discipline, even just holding her, none of it worked to soothe the angry little girl.

"I asked you not to come today" she said flatly, staring at the food.

"I know but I didn't want you to be alone."

She scoffed. "I already am, Nik."

"You have me" he said softly. "And Patrick and Robin and Brenda and Lulu - family of choice."

"I didn't want you to hear that."

Nikolas moved his chair beside hers at the table, turning sideways on the chair so he was facing her. "Didn't want me to hear what?" He tucked her hair behind her ear.

"About my past."

"Don't you mean you didn't want me to hear what your father said?"

She shrugged disinterestedly. "Whatever - I had already told you that I was a disappointment to them, he just confirmed that."

"Nathalie in all the conversations we've had about your family and about mine, how is it you never told me you were abused?"

Her head snapped up. "I wasn't abused" she said firmly.

He rested his hand on her shoulder, wincing at the knots that were so evident. "Yes you were." His voice was kind but firm.

The cutlery clanged against the plate as she dropped it. "Stop saying that!" she insisted as her breathing became more rapid. "I was not abused."

Lifting his hand, he cupped her cheek and wiped at the first tears with his thumb. "Your parents withheld their love from you Nathalie - by anyone's definition, that's abuse."

"Stop" she whispered. She wanted to surrender to his touch, give herself over to him but didn't trust herself to do so. The legacy of her childhood was that she wouldn't allow herself to depend on another person for anything. Drew had worn her down and with infinite patience convinced her that she could trust his love. And then he did the unthinkable. His choice still had her on the run.

Keeping his hand on her face, he ran his thumb over her cheek. "All this time" he said quietly "I thought it was Drew's death that had you reeling but I know now it's because you don't think you can be loved." She shook her head, tears silently slipping down her face. "But that's not true - it is so easy to love you Nathalie." He pressed his lips just underneath her ear. "You are kind and generous and you have shown such love to me. I have seen how you love your children, our friends, my sister and my son. You are loveable."

Nathalie bit her lip to keep from crying. She had no resistence left when he pulled her onto his lap. Draping his arm over her hips, he linked his fingers through hers. "You are loveable" he repeated. A small sob escaped from her throat as she buried her head in his neck. He rubbed her back, saying nothing. Beyond wanting to take care of her, the only other thing he wanted was to cause as much damage to her parents as they had to her.

Robin looked out the window as Patrick and Noah, bundled in winter jackets, stood over the barbecue. She couldn't keep from smiling at both the absurdity and the warmth of the picture before her. Patrick had been so shaken by the day in court that his instinct was to surround himself with those whom he loved. Domesticity was his new source of strength.

"Seriously? They're barbecuing in January?" Brenda asked, sipping on a glass of red wine.

"It's a male thing" Robin shrugged. "Meat, fire, outdoors."

"It's kind of hot and creepy all at the same time isn't it?"

"Oh yeah" Robin agreed. Leaning back against the counter she watched as her friend continued to stare out the window at the two Drake men. "So, uh, Bren?"

"Yah-huh?" Brenda couldn't take her eyes from Noah. He had seen her in full self-sabotage mode and rather than run away and leave her to it, he stayed with her the entire night. He listened without prejudice as she talked about her toxic relationship with Sonny and the bad choices she continued to make in her life. He had held her through the night reminding her time and again that she was safe. In her very jet set life she had been offered diamonds, gems, cars and money but Noah was the first to offer her something that valuable. Her heart ached for Nathalie during her testimony. Brenda had been where she was and knew all too well the damage parents could inflict.

"Anything new going on in your life that you care to tell me about?"

"Not really. Like what?"

"Oh I don't know" Robin said casually. "How long you're staying in Port Charles or perhaps what the heck is going on between you and Noah?"

Brenda dropped her wine glass. "Pardon?"

xxxxx

"So it was bad today in court?" Noah asked as he and Patrick hopped from foot to foot trying to keep warm.

Patrick nodded. "Her parents - gah! I don't have the words."

"Not everyone is meant to be a parent sport. You certainly are though -I can't tell you how proud I am of you every time I see you with Rian."

He blushed uncharacteristically. "Thanks Dad." Lifting the lid on the barbecue Patrick turned the steaks over. "You know, I listened to Nat's dad say that he didn't love her now and that he loved her as a kid when she was deserving of it..."

"What an ass!" Noah exclaimed.

"Yeah" Patrick nodded. "It got me to thinking though - even when things were really bad between us - you were drinking and I was being me - you know, it never occurred to me to think that you didn't love me."

Noah swallowed thickly. "Patrick" he put his hand on his son's shoulder. "The minute your mother told me she was pregnant, I fell in love with you. I used to talk to you through her belly" Patrick grinned remembering how he had done the same thing when Robin was carrying Rian. "I saw you being born and I knew that I would love always because you are my son. There is nothing in this world that could stop me from loving you." Noah pulled his son into a tight embrace.

"I love you Dad." Patrick whispered against his hood.