Disclaimer: The Show Victorious, its characters and other associated copyrights are property of someone else and not me.

The Last Resort

Chapter 2 – Picking up the pieces

Tori's POV

If there was any reaction, I couldn't see it. The Goth sat like a statue just starring out of the window.

I took a couple of unsure steps into the room, feeling very much like an intruder. The words "Krista's territory" ran through my mind.

"I'm not really sure what to say Jade. You were more confident with your words than I ever was. Cat begged me to come and talk with you. I'm so very sorry about Krista." I wasn't sure if Jade would believe me in saying that I was sorry about Krista. But like before, Jade did nothing.

Gathering up my courage, I closed the distance, pulled up a chair next to Jade's wheelchair and sat down. Her eyes were open but her expression was blank. I took a moment to study the Goth's eyes, to try and get a feeling for what was going on inside that head. But I could read nothing in Jade's blank quiet stare out the window. Her only movement was the occasional blinking of her eyes which wasn't that often.

I felt so helpless and guilty and for a few minutes sat quietly next to Jade. Part of me wanted to hold Jade's hand, but I decided to not cross that boundary. Much to my regret, I knew perfectly well that I had forfeited any right to touch Jade.

"I'm the last resort. That's why I'm here. I say that because I know the first words out of your mouth upon seeing me here would be. What the fuck are you doing here? If you don't snap out of this, they will transfer you to a mental hospital. I know you don't want that."

I could hear Jade's imaginary reply in my head. My imaginary Jade was doing the talking for her. "How in the fuck do you know what I want Vega?"

"It could be said that I no longer know you or what you want. I know you hate hospitals or at least you used to. Your mom says you like classical music now, that's changed but I doubt your hatred of hospitals has."

Much like the real one, imaginary Jade remained silent.

"I suppose everyone has told you how much there is too life and how you should rejoin it. How you should remember the good times and move on. Because that's what Krista would want you to do."

"Don't you fucking dare even think of putting words in Krista's mouth Vega!" Imaginary Jade roared.

"I honestly have no clue what Krista would say or want you to do. I met her for less than 5 minutes in probably one of the most painful and awkward moments in my life. It hardly makes me an expert on the subject of Krista Tyler."

Once again imaginary Jade, roared in anger. "Dam fucking right Vega!"

"As I was saying, I'm sure they said all kinds of things to try and snap you out of this. I doubt if I say any of those things it would do any good either. I know your mom outside, thinks I'm going to fail."

"Wow, for once I agree with my mother, you are going to fail Vega." Imaginary Jade said rather sarcastically

"I stayed away because I didn't want to make anything worse. My first instinct was to come to you right away when the accident happened."

"Was that the same instinct that caused you to fuck your co star. instead of your girlfriend?"

"But I'm here now and I'm here to help you Jade. It's the least I can do."

"The least you could do is jump off a fucking cliff, you cheating bitch!" I honestly had no idea if that would be Jade's real reply, but it's the one I imagine I would get. It's the one I deserve though.

At this point the door opened and Allison poked her head in. "I was just checking up on things. You're not moving Jade aren't you? I want her to stay by the window."

I could see it written all over her face, hidden under that placid smile. "You don't belong here, you don't belong with Jade." She never did seem to like me for some reason. Probably cause my dad was a lowly cop. Krista came from money and was much higher class. Krista's dad was a hedge fund manager and her mother was an opera singer. Jade didn't care much about class and money her mom did.

"Everything is fine Allison. Thanks. I'll keep Jade where she is."

After Allison shut the door I turned back to Jade. "She doesn't even want me here, I can tell."

"Holy fuck, I agreed with my mother twice in one day. Call the presses, now that's fucking news. I don't want you here either, shithead."

Though the imaginary Jade in my head was replying, the real one just sat here doing a dead on impression of a statue.

"You want Krista here."

"No shit Sherlock." Imaginary Jade replied bitterly.

"But she's gone." I said sadly.

"FUCK YOU!" Imaginary Jade screamed. "YOU SHOULD BE DEAD AND BURIED, NOT MY KRISTA! SHE ACTUALLY LOVED ME!"

This wasn't the first time I thought what Jade's reply would be in a given situation. The Imaginary Jade in my head was bitter, cold, abusive and unforgiving. Though I knew perfectly well Imaginary Jade wasn't real, it was a form of self imposed punishment that I pulled out from time to time. Have her berate me inside my head for what ever I felt guilty about. Being here with the real Jade, Imaginary Jade was having a god dam field day. Basically imaginary Jade was all my guilt torturing me. The barbs she slings out sting, but I feel like I deserve every last one of them for hurting Jade.

For hurting my precious Jade, my true love.

"I do wish you would insult me, talk to me, say anything. Curse me out. Tell me I'm a fucking whore. It kills me to see you like this Jade. All I have is the imaginary Jade inside my head. She insults me all the time. I deserve every insult and curse she spews out."

"You do deserve every last fucking insult. You worthless whore!"

For an instant the corner of Jade's mouth twitched. It was as if she was going to smirk. But soon after, she was silent and motionless.

I quietly sat for several minutes just looking at Jade. Mostly I thought of the look of hurt on her face when I told Jade that I had slept with Mark. That look continues to haunt me, but now it was gone. I could feel the regret and guild filling me up inside.

As I continued to think I looked over at fly that was crawling up Jade's arm.

"What run out useless shit to say Vega? You've been quiet to fucking long. Come on, entertain me with your useless babble as to why I'm supposed to move. Like Norman Bates in psycho, I'm not even going to swat that fly."

Ignoring the insults of the Imaginary Jade, I reached over and swatted the fly away.

"Going to wipe my ass too?"

"Don't just sit here Jade. You're so talented and full of life. You've never been one to give up so easily. I know it's painful. But you have family and friends that want to help you."

A loud chuckle came from imaginary Jade. "If you think that's going to work, you're dumber than I thought and I think you're pretty fucking stupid already."

I sighed. "You know what? Since I have you here I'm just going to say what I've wanted to say for years. I'm sorry Jade. I fucked up." Tears began to form in my eyes. "I'm so sorry. Not a day has gone by where I haven't kicked myself for hurting you. I miss you so much. You were always so jealous of everyone I spoke to. But instead of talking about it, working it out. I decided to give you something to be really jealous about. It was a stupid impulsive decision and it cost me the love of my life." By the end of my speech I was sobbing and put my head down on the arm of Jade's wheelchair.

Imaginary Jade was silent but I heard a whisper. At first I was sure I imagined it.

"I did the same thing."

My head snapped up as she looked to the still motionless Jade. But this time the expression was different. It was one of sadness."

I never expected to succeed or even if I did, so soon. I quickly wiped my tears away. "You…You…said something. I think."

After a moment, a rather pained expression began to form on Jade's face. Just the sight of it, broke my heart. "I killed her." she said softly.

No One's POV

Jade seemed to break down and began to cry. The gulf between them seemed to vanish for a moment as Jade leaned forward toward in need of comfort. Tori instinctively wrapped her arms around Jade who leaned into her shoulder and cried. Tori let Jade cry and cry, just rubbing slow gentle circles on Jade's back.

After a few minutes Jade seemed to regain her senses, wipe her tears, pulled back and quieted down. Tori could once again see the gulf between them. Tori sensed, that Jade's defenses had snapped back into place.

"I'm never going to forgive you Tori." Imaginary Jade said mockingly.

Allison again came into the room, with a rather smug, condescending look on her face. "Well Tori, I know you tried and we do appreciate your efforts. But I have a specialist who is comi…

Tori's patience snapped. "Allison, for your information I succeeded. Jade is Back. Must you always treat me like I'm a piece of shit on your shoe?"

Jade's face darkened, "Get out!" She barked.

"You hear her Tori, You've done enough damage." Alison snapped.

Tori suddenly felt terrible for saying what she did and got up to leave as Jade requested. But before she could get a food from the chair, Jade's hand tightly gripped her arm.

"Not you." Jade hissed.

Jade then looked at her somewhat stunned mother. "I was talking to you. Get OUT!"

Alison's mouth fell open and she quickly grabbed the door handle and retreated out of the room. Tori unsure of what to do or say next, simply sat down with her hands in her lap, waiting for Jade to say something.

Jade sat there again, looking very much like before. But with one notable exception, the eyes were alive and full of emotion. It was an intense, pained sad expression.

Jade said nothing but just gazed out the window. Tori kept quiet and didn't move. Jade obviously wanted her here but made no effort to communicate. It was very odd, but Jade could be very odd at times. After a half an hour Tori began to think that Jade had retreated back into her mind.

"I failed." Tori thought sadly.

"Of course you did bozo" Imaginary Jade said quickly.

At this point, Tori felt like she needed to leave. She simply couldn't take it anymore. The feeling of failure, guilt and loss that consumed her.

As Tori got up again and began to walk away, Jade spoke without warning in a cold voice.

"Did you come here because Cat made you or because you really wanted to help me?"

Stunned by Jade's sudden words, Tori stammered. "Um…the second one."

Jade nodded and remained quiet for a moment. "Come back tomorrow afternoon. Tell the others I want to be left alone."

"Yes Jade." Tori said as she quietly walked to the door. Jade said nothing else as Tori left.

Bonus chapter – I hope everyone is enjoying the story.