A/N: One of my friends reminds me of Bike, so this one is for her. :)
Brittany sat stretching in the middle of the gym floor, having just finished another day of dance camp. Mike had asked her to help him teach for two weeks during the summer, and she was more than happy to help. There was only one thing…well, person, she loved more than dancing.
That's who she was thinking of now.
Santana.
No matter what she thought about, it always went back to Santana. She thought about her during breakfast, when she took Lord Tubbington on walks, when she made crafts in the afternoon with her little sister, during family game nights on Wednesdays. That's who she thought about in school all the time. Santana was much more interesting than whatever the teachers had to say.
No matter where she was, everything reminded her of Santana. Like two of the girls in one of the classes today looked like her and San did when they were that age. The mini Santana watched as the mini Brittany danced, and the mini Brittany helped the mini Santana with the steps when she got lost. When the mini Brittany messed up her dancing, and another little girl laughed, the mini Santana stomped over and threatened to make the girl eat her teeth. Brittany made the mini Santana sit in the corner (even though she really didn't want to), and made the little girl who laughed apologize to the mini Brittany.
Santana always stood up for Brittany. Brittany didn't like to talk, and she didn't like fighting, so even if people said things that were mean to her, she never did anything about it. Santana took care of her. Santana was always checking on Brittany to make sure she was okay, to see how her day was. Santana would send Brittany texts to tell her something funny she thought of or saw, sometimes even when they were in the same room together. Brittany would laugh and then look up to find Santana already smiling at her. As if the only reason she sent what she did was to make Brittany smile.
Santana always knew how to make Brittany smile. She knew Brittany better than anyone. She knew why Brittany didn't talk a lot. She took Brittany seriously, something she didn't think anyone else did. She knew what Brittany liked, and she knew what she didn't like. Brittany knew Santana would do anything to make her happy. And that's why what they were going through right now hurt Brittany so much.
Seeing Santana hurt was the worst thing in the world. She felt like her heart would drop whenever Santana was upset, and she felt like her insides would fall to a million pieces when she saw Santana cry. She loved Santana more than anything, and whatever Santana felt, Brittany somehow felt too.
Santana was hurting so much right now, and that meant Brittany did too. Brittany just wanted it all to stop. She just wanted to be with Santana. She knew they'd be so happy together. She wished things were different so they could be.
"Care for some company?"
Brittany looked up to see Mike walking towards her. She smiled up at him. "You bet!"
Mike sat down Indian style in front of her about five feet away. "I really appreciate you helping me with this dance camp, Britt."
"You tell me that every day," Brittany giggled.
"I know." He shrugged. "I just want to make sure you know it."
Brittany folded her legs in to mirror the way Mike was sitting. "I do."
"Good." He thought for a moment. "So how are you and Santana?"
Brittany's face fell a bit. "We're fine."
"Are you sure? If you need to talk some more, you know I'll always listen," he offered. "What's on your mind, Britt?"
"Santana," she answered.
"Why did I ask?" Mike smiled at her.
"Because you can't read minds?" she asked flatly.
"You're right. I can't. It'd be awesome if I could though!" he chuckled. "What about Santana?"
She looked down to the gym floor. "I don't know what to do."
"Just give her time. This is something she needs to do on her own," he said, leaning back on his hands. "You know that."
"Yeah, and I'm letting her. But it's hard." Brittany sighed as she picked her head up, and twisted to the left to stretch her back. "I want to hold her hand when we're at the movies. I want to kiss her forehead when we're standing around waiting for ice cream with gummy bears. I want to call her the things she won't let me call her outside our rooms." She twisted to the right to stretch her back further. "I want to show everybody how happy she makes me."
Mike watched her as she turned back and forth again. "Why don't you show her how happy she makes you?"
"How? She doesn't like to talk about feelings a lot, and she usually decides what we're doing," she answered as she put her hands up over her head to straighten her spine.
"Well, ask her to come over and have a date at your house," he suggested. "Your mom and dad could go out to dinner and take your sister so it'd be just the two of you. You could order pizza or Tina and I could come over and help you cook, then you could watch a movie."
Brittany smiled widely at him as she dropped her hands. "She likes Breadstix. They have takeout, right?"
"Yep!" He nodded. "They do! Anything I can help you with, just let me know, okay?"
"I will for sure," she responded. "You know what we should play?"
Mike smiled at her. "10 Things I Love About…?"
"Yes!" she exclaimed, excited.
"Sure, Britt," he said as he sat up straighter, off his hands. "You go first or I go first?"
"You go!" Brittany replied, gesturing in at him.
"Okay!" he laughed, brushing his hands together to get the dust from the gym floor off. "One thing I love about Tina is that she doesn't dress like everybody else, and it doesn't bother her at all."
She stretched her legs out straight in front of her, and leaned back on her hands. "One thing I love about Santana is that she likes the outside crunchy part of the Oreo, and I like the middle."
"Two things I love about Tina are that she doesn't dress like anybody else and it doesn't bother her and she knows a lot about almost every religion in the world," he responded, a little quicker.
Brittany turned her head from side to side stretching her neck. "Two things I love about Santana are that she likes the outside crunchy part of the Oreo, and I like the inside, and she likes to wear my t-shirts when she sleeps over at my house."
"Three things I love about Tina are that she doesn't dress like anybody else, and she doesn't care, she knows about nearly every religion in the world, and her favorite movies are zombie movies." He smiled more at the last part.
"Three things I love about Santana are that she likes the crunchy part of the Oreo, and I like the middle, she likes to wear my t-shirts when she sleeps over at my house, and when Lord Tubbington refuses to move on his walks, she always carries him home," she replied quickly.
"Okay. Four things I love about Tina are that she doesn't dress like everybody else and doesn't care what they think, knows about most of the religions of the world, her favorite movies are zombie movies, and that she tried to teach me how to play the piano, even though I'm terrible at it," Mike said very quickly, nearly getting jumbled at the end.
"I always win, Mike," Brittany laughed. "Four things I love about Santana are that she likes the crunchy part of the Oreo, and I like the middle, she likes to wear my t-shirts when she sleeps over, she carries Lord Tubbington home when he gets too tired to walk, and how she always plays with my hair."
Mike laughed as well. "You win, Brittany. I lost the order of mine. Just finish it out."
Brittany smiled again. "I told you. The rest of the ten things about Santana I love are that she puts my rainbow goldfish in different color piles, that she only likes the twisty kind of spaghetti noodles, that she takes me to the zoo once a month, that she lets me paint her toes in all different colors, that she sings to me when we're driving, and that she always sends me good morning texts, even if she stayed over."
"She's really sweet to you, Britt," Mike said as he returned her smile. "This was fun. One time, I will win!"
"I don't think you will," she replied as she pulled her legs in to start to stand to leave.
"Okay, maybe not," he said laughing as he watched her. "Do you feel better?"
"Yeah, I do, she said nodding, as she stood up. "You're a good friend to me. What would I do without you?"
"Dance alone?" he answered.
"What does dancing have to do with being my friend?" She walked over and held her hand out for him to take.
He shook his head, laughing, as he took her hand and stood up. "Nothing, Britt. It has nothing to do with it at all."
"Hey, Mike?" Brittany asked as they walked back to where their things were. "Why are goldfish in rainbow colors if they're gold?"
Mike turned his head to look at her as they continued to walk. "You know, Britt, that's a great question for Santana."
Rachel's eyes were closed as she slowly shook her head side to side. "Oh. Sam. I-" She hesitated before opening them, looking around at the busying restaurant around her, before finally settling her eyes back on Sam. "I'm not sure I- your question has me so confused. No. I mean, the question didn't confuse me. It's more that you asked it….you," she nodded towards him. "Sam Evans."
"Sam I am," he laughed lightly.
"Yes," she said as she forced a small laugh. "But what would make you ask me something like that? That's a very interesting question. I'd- I'd like to hear your reasoning behind it." She paused for a moment. "This is Quinn Fabray we're talking about."
Sam gave her a confused look. "So?"
"So?" Rachel mirrored his look. "I cannot like Quinn Fabray, Sam."
He waited for a few moments before responding. "I'm sorry. I- I just wanted to ask in case you wanted somebody to talk to about it. It just seemed like you did. I guess I was wrong. We can forget I asked." He shrugged and looked down at his glass.
Rachel studied the somewhat uncomfortable look now on his face. The same one he wore when he asked her his first question just moments ago. She cleared her throat to get him to look up at her. "No, that's not what I meant… When I said I couldn't like her, I didn't mean that I didn't like her." She diverted her eyes to the left for a moment and back at him. "This must have been incredibly hard for you to do, knowing you could've been incorrect in your thinking…also slightly awkward, considering your history with Quinn."
He gave her a small smile, relieved. "It's not."
"Well then, if you say so," she said as she straightened in her seat, folding her arms on the table, looking directly at him. "Firstly, I'd like to say thank you. We aren't even that close and yet you took the time to come talk to me about this- this subject, which could have put you in an incredibly embarrassing position, had you been wrong. Not only that, but any other person would probably have taken the idea and run with it, spreading it around the school, further perpetuating my already less than stellar reputation." She took a small breath, pausing momentarily. "Anyway, the entire gesture was very sweet, Sam, so again, thank you."
"There's really nothing to thank me for," he shrugged. "You need a friend and I'm glad to be it. And you know I hate rumors, so you can be sure anything you say to me won't go any further."
She smiled at him. "Thank you for that as well. The second thing I'd like to say to you is that I'm honestly very surprised by this." She laughed lightly to herself, shaking her head. "I mean, that's obvious. But I'm referring to how you knew. I know I am not the best at hiding my feelings when it comes to who I'm attracted to, but I thought I was more than careful this time. I- I had to be. So I can't imagine what would've put this sort of idea in your head. What made you realize that I- that I liked her? Was it something I said? Something I did? Maybe it was a combination of both?"
"A little bit of both," he said slowly, clearly trying to think through her questions.
She jumped back in before he could continue. "You mentioned something I said when we went to Harry Potter, as well as how I acted today? Maybe start there?"
"Right," he nodded. "And I said I didn't remember what you said."
"Do you remember anything? What it had to do with?" she asked, unable to conceal the anxiousness in her voice.
Sam reached up to run his fingers through his hair as he thought. "Uh, I thought it was kind of weird you went to go see the movie when you'd never seen any of the others or read the books or anything."
"Well, Sam. That's easy!" she said happily as she picked up her glass. "The movie was irrelevant to me. Anything that involved Quinn, I would most certainly not have hesitated-"
"That's it!" he quietly shouted cutting her off, snapping his fingers at her.
She jumped slightly at his reaction, carefully setting her glass back down. "What? What's it?"
"You went for Quinn!" he replied, as if it was obvious. "Why would you go see the last movie of the series when you hadn't seen the rest of for just a friend? I wouldn't. But I'd go for someone I liked."
"I suppose that's not very friend-like behavior, is it?" She gave him a small, innocent, smile. "We'll get back to that in a moment. Let's talk about you and Mercedes. That's….odd to me." She shook her head lightly. "Don't get me wrong. It's not a bad thing, just rather unexpected more than anything. I'm happy for you both. I never did tell you that."
"Always too distracted by Quinn?" he asked, jokingly.
"Hmm…" She laughed. "I guess I was!"
He smiled at her, chuckling lightly, picking up his glass to take a drink. "But thanks. It wasn't expected, but I guess we have you to blame." He tilted his head towards her as he took a drink.
"Me?" she asked, surprised.
He nodded as he set his drink back down. "Yeah, you were the one who had us all go to prom together."
"Oh! Yes, yes! Of course! And then I invited Jesse, and-" she stopped abruptly as an annoyed look came over her face.
Sam waited for her to continue for a moment, but when she didn't asked, "Did something happen with Jesse?"
"Well, I suppose you could say that." She took a breath, as she thought for a moment. "After what happened at the party with Finn, I needed someone to talk to, you know. I couldn't very well tell my dads what Finn had said, and I couldn't talk to Quinn…for that reason I mentioned earlier. There really was no one else. Jesse is really me in male form, so I thought he would be most able to understand how dramatic it all was. But in predictable Jesse St. James form, he decided it would be a good idea to use my vulnerability to make his move. Let me tell you something," she said, leaning forward. "I took all the anger I had towards Finn out on him, and he is now taking a mini vacation with his parents in Bali. He will swear to you it's because he needed to, and I quote, 'take a break from the unattractive drama of Rachel Berry', but I'm quite positive it's because I may have threatened his vocal cords." She sighed, rolling her eyes, leaning back again. "And they say I'm the diva."
Sam slowly nodded his head. "Well, there will be no move making here. I like my vocal cords where they are."
"Oh, Sam, I would never!" she reassured him. "I'm very aware that you are far more respectful that Jesse when it comes to my feelings, and had I known then what I know, about what a good friend you are, I'm sure I would've come to you."
"I'm sorry I wasn't here for you sooner." There was a hint of regret in his voice.
"Please, don't apologize! I'm very grateful you are here now!" She smiled genuinely at him. "Anyway, why would you have reason to even come talk to me? Finn and I had broken up so many times before, no one else ever bothered to ask how I was doing. I've been caught in the Finn bubble for a long time. Now that I'm free, I can finally see how very…wrong it all was."
"But you're sure you're okay?" he asked, still concerned.
"Yes, Sam! I promise you, I am fine. I mean, the words hurt, and I replay them sometimes in my head. Both what was said to me, and to Quinn, about Quinn…let's not talk about that, okay?" She forced a small smile and continued. "If you want to know the truth, I think it's been a long time since I loved Finn, really loved him. I'm sure part of me always will, because he was my first love, and nothing will change that, but I will never go back to him."
"When did you realize there was no more Finchel?" he asked trying to sound serious, while also trying to hide his smile.
Rachel nearly choked on her peach iced tea. "Did you just say that to me?"
"I think I did." He waited a moment as he pretended to think. "Unless somebody took Polyjuice Potion and I'm actually someone else pretending to be me, but I'm not. I'm me. And it would have been me who said it anyway."
"Now I see why you don't mind that I ramble," she laughed. "And don't think I don't know what you're talking about now! She made me watch every movie! And read the books!"
He chuckled. "I'll have to high five her next time I see her."
Rachel's face fell slightly, and her smile faltered.
"Aw, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you," he said, frowning.
"No, no, you didn't. It was just one of many everyday reminders that she isn't speaking to me. It's not your fault. I could look at the straw for example, and think of her." She began to play with the straw in her glass. "She likes two straws in her drink, did you know that?"
"I did," he replied.
"Of course you do," she said, as she smiled ever so slightly, not looking up from the now swirling liquid in her glass. "That's why it's so ideal for you to sing this song to her. Not only does your voice fit it perfectly, but you will really put your all behind it because you care about her. You loved her, or maybe you still do. She deserves this."
"She does. And a part of me will always love her," he said, giving her a small smile back.
She looked up from her glass. "Because she's your first love?"
He nodded. "She is."
Rachel thought for a moment. "Why does this not bother you?"
"Bother me?" he asked, somewhat confused.
"Talking about this, about me liking her, all of it," she shrugged, swirling the straw in her glass again.
"Me and Quinn had our time. I wasn't right for her I guess," he said with the slightest hint of sadness in his voice. "But I've never seen her happier than I did this summer, and her happiness is what matters to me the most."
She gave him a kind smile. "You're a good person, Sam. I'm lucky to be able to call you my friend. As for Quinn's happiness this summer, I'm very glad to see I'm not the only one who noticed. Though I of course won't take credit for it, if that's what you might have been insinuating. Quinn had quite the summer. I think her happiness is mostly because she finally let someone else help carry the burdens."
"You mean you," he said as more of a statement than a question.
"No." Rachel shook her head. "Not just me. It was actually Santana of all people she opened up to first, though that's not so surprising. It makes sense given they are the two most closed off people I know. They would be the ones to open up to each other." She waited a moment, and sighed as she picked at her straw. "Quinn is very lucky to have Santana, as Santana is very lucky to have Quinn."
"I'd say Quinn was lucky to have you." Sam smiled.
Rachel looked up at his comment, and smiled back, her eyes watering just slightly. "Thank you, Sam. That's a very nice thing to say." She looked back down at the straw. "But I'm the lucky one of course."
Sam tilted his head as he watched her. "Uh…how is Santana? Do you know?"
"She is…managing." She sighed. "It's obviously very difficult, you know. I imagine it's probably the worst feeling in the world. This is what she was afraid of in the first place. Not this specifically, as I'm sure it was quite unexpected. The scale of it for starters, the way it all happened- Wait." She paused and looked up at him. "How do you even know about this? I thought it was only Quinn, Brittany and me."
"Quinn kind of said something about it when she was helping me watch Stacy and Stevie. She didn't go into details or anything," he said quietly.
"Yes. I don't know all the details either. I don't think anyone but Quinn and Santana know. Brittany probably knows some, but I'm sure Santana has hidden the uglier parts from her." She smiled slightly in understanding. "If anyone will be able to help her, it's Quinn….after what she's been through."
Sam nodded. "She's a strong person."
Rachel didn't answer for a moment. Her eyes began to water and she quickly wiped the tears that had barely begun to form away with her fingertips. "I'm sorry, Sam. It's just that we spent so much time together, and thinking about all we've- all she's been through and shared with me, and how very strong she's had to be…" She breathed in and out a few times as she wiped under her eyes again. "I can't talk anymore about this. Not right now okay?"
"It's fine, Rachel. I didn't mean to make you upset," he answered apologetically.
"You didn't," she quietly replied, shaking her head. "It's the situation. I blame it all on that stupid party. Thank goodness no one but Quinn, Brittany, and I knew about Santana then! Who knows what Finn might've-" Her facial expression grew angry, and the tone in her voice changed to match. "Damnit! Why does everything keep coming back to him?"
"It doesn't, it doesn't have to!" he said quickly, changing the subject. "Let's talk about more things that made me think you liked Quinn. We didn't finish that."
Rachel took deep breath. "I'm sorry, Sam. It's just very frustrating. And I never curse, so you can imagine. Yes, please. Let's talk about my tells, and then maybe we'll finally get around to you answering my question."
"Your question?" he asked as he tried to remember. "Oh, yeah. There isn't much more of mine, so I'll finish, and then I'll answer that. Or I'll try."
"Of course, Sam," she nodded in agreement. "That was my suggestion. Go on and tell me what gave away my admiration for Quinn Fabray."
Sam slowly nodded his head for a few moments. "That's what it was mostly I guess, that you admire her. I mean the way you talked about her today is what really made me think. But everything always goes back to Quinn, doesn't it? That whole nose job thing, and you always talk about how pretty she is, you always go after her."
She thought for a second before responding. "I'm not sure how you know all these things, nor do I understand how you noticed so much. Or how you put all this together. It took me since the…" She rolled her eyes. "…party to figure out everything."
"It's harder to see things about yourself than for other people to, right?" he asked as he picked up his glass. "You know people think I'm not the brightest crayon in the box? I guess it's true when it comes to things that are boring, but things I find cool, like Avatar, and comic books, and Harry Potter, and you guys, my friends, I pay really close attention to." He shrugged as he took a drink, then set the glass back down. "I watch, and I like to listen."
Rachel smiled at him. "I think I've really missed out on a good friend in you, Sam."
"Well, you have me now and I am here to stay," he told her, smiling back. "Does this mean I get to joke with you now? I have a really good one!"
"Should I be scared?" she asked, laughing.
"No. It's funny! So, you know how today you told Finn you weren't gay…" he said, trying to sound serious, but cracking a smile. "You're just gay for Fabray?"
"Sam Evans!" Rachel exclaimed. "You brought up Finn! No more jokes for you!" She ran her fingers over her hair as she composed herself. "I mean, it's funny. I'm gay for Fabray. HA HA. I'll have to tell my dads that one." Her facial expression changed when she noticed the time. "Oh my, we need to focus! It's already two minutes until 7. We'll be lucky if I even get an answer!" She took a breath, closed and then opened her eyes again as she blew out. "Now. When might Quinn start talking to me again?"
"Santana said something about you guys not talking. What happened?"
Rachel turned to see Brittany standing beside the booth. Rachel opened her mouth to speak, but closed it and turned back to Sam. "This would happen. All because of your joke! You will answer my question," she said matter-of-factly.
As Sam put his hands up in front of him, nodded, and mouthed, 'okay, okay', Brittany spoke again. "You mean when Q is going to talk to you again? She'll talk to you she wants. Let her come to you." Brittany paused for a moment, and then continued. "They talked about you in the car today though, so it shouldn't be long."
Rachel scooted over in the booth to let Brittany sit down. "Brittany, what did they say?"
"I can't tell you, Rachel, that wouldn't be right," she said, shrugging as she slid into the booth.
Rachel moved her drink from in front of Brittany. "But you just told me they were talking about me! Why won't you tell me what they said?"
Brittany looked at Rachel as she reached for the menu behind the napkin holder. "It's not the same thing."
Rachel's mouth dropped again. "But now I know they were! Can't you at least tell me what it was in regards to? If the conversation was good or bad? What one of them said? Quinn preferably," she added quickly. "Brittany! Just tell me what they were talking about!"
"I told you it was about you, Rachel," Brittany answered her obviously.
Rachel rolled her eyes, but before she could say anything, Sam, who'd been silently sitting listening to them go back and forth, waved in the direction of the front entrance of the restaurant. "Hey! Mike!"
Rachel turned around to watch as Mike walked up to the table. He walked over to Sam's side, and after Sam scooted over to make room for him, he sat down. "Hey guys! What's up?"
"Mike, so nice of you to join us," she said, smiling at him before turning back to Brittany.
"I'm not that late, am I?" he asked, looking down to check the time on his phone.
"No," Sam answered him laughing. "She's just annoyed that Brittany won't give her the information she wants."
"Oh?" Mike looked to Rachel and then to Brittany. "What information?"
Rachel sighed as Brittany obliviously continued to look over her menu. She gestured towards her. "Quinn and Santana apparently had a conversation involving me, and she refuses to tell me what it was about!" Brittany went to speak, but Rachel cut her off. "Yes, I know it was about me."
Brittany shrugged, and Mike gave Rachel a sympathetic smile. "I'm sure there's a reason Britt can't tell you, and that it wasn't that bad. Right, Britt?"
"Oh, I'll tell you about it after dinner," Brittany said smiling, reaching in front of Rachel to put her menu back behind the napkin holder.
Rachel stared at her as she sat back again. "Are you- are you kidding me?"
Brittany shrugged, and before Rachel could say something else, Mike jumped in. "Hey! Let's talk about why we came here!"
"That sounds awesome," Sam agreed.
Rachel rolled her eyes. "Fine. Now then. Mike, are you aware of why I asked you and Sam to join Brittany and I for dinner today?"
"Because you have a song you want us, well, Sam, to sing to Quinn and Santana?" he answered.
"Yes! And I am very appreciative that you are willing to hear my suggestion." She reached into her purse and pulled out a small stack of papers. She thumbed through them, separating two copies of sheet music. She slid them across the table to Sam and Mike, and watched as they both looked over the music. "I imagine you are familiar with the song."
"I love this song, Rachel," Sam said smiling up to look at her. "I'm in."
"Yeah, me too. This is a great song. It's really good for both Santana and Quinn," he added. "I get it coming from Brittany, but I'm not sure I understand why it's coming from you, Rachel."
"Oh, that's easy, Mike," Brittany replied, straightening the way she was sitting. "Quinn is Rachel's Santana. Only she's Quinn. Because if she was Santana, then that would mean both me and Rachel loved Santana and that would be bad."
He nodded to himself. "That's why you wanted to know what they said about you. The song actually makes a lot more sense now." He looked over to Rachel, who sat staring hard at Brittany. "You know what, Rachel. That's really cool."
Rachel turned her head slightly to look at Mike, her eyebrows raised. "I'm sorry?"
"I said that's really cool," he repeated. "You know, that you like Quinn."
She perked up at his comment. "Well, thank you so much, Mike. That's very kind of you to say. I hope everyone, in glee club I mean, will be as supportive as the two of you are. I imagine they might be, with the exception of-" She cleared her throat. "Finn, of course. But if you would keep this to yourself, please, I don't want the rest of the school to find out. More importantly, I don't want Quinn to know just yet either."
Sam smiled at her in understanding. "She'll come around, Rachel."
Rachel nodded at Sam and smiled, then looked back at Mike. "So please don't say anything? You can tell Tina, but only if she asks. Don't volunteer any information? I understand that withholding information is still lying, but this is important to me. I hope you understand."
"If that's what you want, Rachel, then I won't tell anybody. And only Tina if she asks." Mike thought for an instant before he continued. "But can I ask what you're going to do about it if she never finds out you like her?"
"Well, I don't really have a plan as of right this moment. But I think we'll just start with the two of you singing this song to her and Santana." She gestured towards the papers in front of Mike and Sam. "And see what happens after that."