Okay… Maybe saying I'll update every two weeks was a bit ambitious for my lazy procrastinating self. I'll try to write faster and more but I have exams coming up and after four years of not working and relying on common sense, I have decided it was time to start making a bit of effort. Yay… (' -.-)
But rejoice! The updates should be really quick from now on as the time in the story matches the time in real life (ex: This arc is happening around April – May) and I have four chapters to write before the end of May (hint: The cat festival's in May :D) (I seriously doubt I'll make it)
Anywho, sorry again for my little knowledge on the city of Vienna, I completely ditched Google map so this is purely my imagination speaking thus I have avoided writing descriptions.
Prussia started at the old lady in front of him as if she had just announced he had cancer. Did she just say that…?
"Is the way to Rotenturm street that incredible? Let me guess, we're gonna have to find eight keys, fight two boss battles and brave a desert to reach destination. Unless she just revealed the meaning of life to you, I doubt you should continue making that weird fish face expression." Irene said. The Prussian and the grandma didn't break off eye contact, instead, the woman's glare turned up on an intensity scale. The teen was surprise by the hatred she could literally see oozing from the elder "Seriously, is she an old girlfriend of yours you slept with and never called back? It looks like she wants to rip off both your eyes and poke your eyes out of their sockets with a Hello Kitty chopstick… Simultaneously."
The albino had trouble saying anything. He was not scared! He's not scared of old grandmas! This one was just a bit… intimidating. She would probably have been able to compete against Russia in a glare-innocent-people-who-never-did-anything-to-you-to-death contest. Nah, no one beats crazy Iva – okay… maybe she does. As the near blind brown eyes pierced deeper into the former empire's soul, the latter had more and more trouble getting his voice to produce any sound; never once had he seen a stranger hating him so much, and all he did was ask for directions! Is that impolite nowadays? What the kartoffel did my awesome self ever do to piss her off? Women…
"Don't you understand Austrian?" impatiently asked the girl "Might I remind you that the Austro-russian alliance can fall on us any moment from now? Let's just ask someone else!"
The teenager's voice brought Gilbert back to reality "Austrian isn't a language," he corrected "She speaks the awesome german language!" a proud smile appeared on his lips but disappeared as quickly due to the imaginary daggers he could feel stabbing him.
Irene's eyes opened wide "Austrian isn't a language? My whole life is a lie! Tell me cookies exist."
"What?" questioned the ex-nation
"TELL ME COOKIES EXIST! TELL ME THEY'RE REAL! THIS IS A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH!" insisted the brunette while shaking her strategist. "GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DON'T SAY COOKIES ARE REAL CONCRETE OBJECTS AND NOT CREATIONS OF MY SCREWED UP TEENAGE MIND, I WILL EAT GILBERT FOR BREAKFAST. FRIED. WITH MAPLE SYRUP."
"They're real! Calm down. What's wrong with you?" asked the albino
"Sorry," the girl apologized "I tend to overreact when one of the facts I believed in for so long turns out to be wrong. I hate not knowing something or being badly informed. It makes me feel stupid. And a good brain is pretty much my only good point."
"You're a nerd?" the man wondered in disbelief
"I prefer the term intellectually talented. Why does that surprise everyone? Do I look that dumb?" before Gilbert could reply, the old woman coughed to remind the two of her (unfortunate) presence. Her wrinkled hands grabbed Irene's and with a look of compassion she asked something of her. And of course, Irene just had to use the traditional if-you-don't-understand-just-nod-and-smile technique in response. I took five seconds and a grandma coming out of her banana stand with a knife for the white haired man to react. The young man quickly grabbed his accomplice and ran awa – strategically retreated from the crazy old woman.
"What's happening? What did she say? Should I have answered 'no'?" asked the teenager while running nest to Gilbert
"A potential murderer has chosen me to be her next target, she asked if I was your boyfriend and yes." Hastily answered the young man. "Do I really look like someone who tries to get in the pants of high school girl? I'm no paedophile!"
"Seeing the people you date are around twenty years old and you're like centuries old, I think it's safe to assume the term paedophile mat be used to describe you." Irene contradicted with a grin, trying to keep up with the man's quick pace.
"I don't have a dating li – Uh… I mean the awesome me is no paedophile!" denied Prussia
"You don't date? Pfffff HAHAHAHAHA! I knew you were quite the get-away-from-any-feminine-life-form type of guy during your Teutonic knight era but seriously? Even now? HAHAHA…ha…ha…" Gilbert noticed the girl was all red when her laughter became intertwined by heavy breathing. She was slowing down and holding her sides. The albino sighed, he decided to take on America's job for once and be the hero, only he would be the awesome hero, he grabbed the girl and slung her over his shoulder, carrying her like a bag of potatoes. Speaking of potatoes… When was the last time I drank with West?
"What the …?" Irene had time to exclaim before she noticed the psychopath still following them, she let out a foreign swear word and warned the Prussian "She's still there! What does she eat to be so full of energy? Batteries?"
"The less you talk the easier it is for me to – humpf!" Gilbert stumbled back from the collision, he was more muscular than the man he bumped into thus sending the latter to the ground "I'm sorry, I didn – Austria?"
"Ah, Gilbert. Could you help me fin – Irene?" the aristocrat asked noticing the girl being carried like merchandise by his fellow personification.
"RUN!" Irene yelled, reminding the albino of the Austrian old hag chasing after them. Prussia quickly took off in another direction while the teen observed with horror the formation of an Austrio-russio-hag alliance. They turned a few more corners before being confident they had lost their pursuers.
"Damn! Now they know my awesome self sided with you! Remind me why I chose to?" the oldest of the two wondered
"Beats me. It's too late to turn back anyway." Smirked the girl "Let's just try to find Hungary to free her."
"Well that's two things you can cross from you list." Informed a woman's voice. Hungary slumped on the wall of the alley they took refuge in to catch her breath "Is the camera okay?" Irene pointed to the gadget hanging around her neck and earned a relieved look from the female nation.
"Hello to you too, I'm fine thank you." Sarcastically answered Gilbert
"I see you haven't changed, товарищ." They all looked up to see a pair of beautiful amethyst eyes.
Hungary felt like thanking God for making her a woman. Few man carried nail files with them. Of course, the meagre weapon could only inflict so little damage on the metal chain but mixed with a country's strength, even a fly could become a bullet. The last inconvenience standing between Elizaveta and the pictures was a powerful giant well known for having mental problems. Meh. Finland managed to fight him. The ash blond man smiled innocently at the woman. Then again, Finland is much more than he seems. I wonder if he really allows Sweden to be dominant… I can totally picture uke Sweden! Not the right time to be doing that. So… after I break the chains… Who am I kidding? There's only one thing I can do anyway.
The girl slowly started cutting the metal links and eventually fell to the ground with as little noise as she could make when Russia found himself distracted by whatever was keeping his attention. She began to run and barely had time to sprint a few meters before the cold country began his chase and managed a few more before she got caught.
"Let me go!" she yelled
"Het. You are the bait." He responded. Think brain, think! Screw my weak female body! Am I supposed to stay captive and wait for a prince charming? There's no way I'm doing tha – I'm a woman. I'm a woman! A poor defenceless young girl!
"Help! I'm being molested!" she yelled out "That man's a pervert!" Ivan weakened his grip on the girl by surprise, She took the opportunity to pull out her frying pan and swung it towards the tall man's stomach, giving her enough time to make an escape. She wondered in the Austrian town until she heard Irene's voice. Thank god she's okay! She quickly joined her new friend and Prussia who seemed to have been dragged against his will in this mini war. Little did she know, a Russian had managed to follow her.