Before you start ranting on how long it took me to update, I would like to justify myself by telling all of you awesome people that I have been writing chapters in advance. I knew I would only have time to upload during chinese camp which is why the next four chapters have been finished and will be uploaded once a week.

Reviewers are awesome.

Followers are awesome.

Readers are awesome.

So you'll all become one with Mother Russia, da?

PpD: Hetalia belongs to me, as you all know. *rolls eyes*
Italy: Veeee~ Really?
Germany: Don' t listen to her, Hetalia belongs to Himaruya Hidekazu.
PpD: Killjoy.

Anyway, I have created a pole on my profile for this story so please check it out!

Germany's car was put to a stop when he reached the parking. Despite the little faith he had in that kind of thing, He decided to listen to his horoscope since it was coming up. Oh well, it couldn't hurt and he might get a laugh out of it. Yeah right, last time he actually laughed out loud was after an evening spent with Gilbert… And a few glasses of beer. Just a few.

"Libra: Today, prepare your heart for unexpected surprises as they will fall upon you like little drops of fresh rain on a hot day!" exclaimed the car's radio.

They really emphasis everything, Ludwig thought to himself, how do people believe in this? It's nonsense and after hanging around so many nations, I know nonsense like the tips of my fingers. If only he had been human for a while, long enough to pay more attention to this day's prediction; he would have been more prepared for what was going to happen. Unfortunately, a certain cold hearted author found it fun to make the German nation suffer.

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He wasn't expecting much from that meeting. Actually he had stopped expecting anything from meetings since the second one he ever attended. A sigh escaped his mouth as he glanced at his watch. Thirty minutes early. With that much time to spare, Ludwig knew who to expect: England (forever the first one), Russia (creepy… but hardworking) and with a bit of luck, Poland (he was the host after all). He decided to keep his hopes low and took a deep breath before opening the door.

Unexpected surprise # 1 (AKA mini heart attack): Well that was a lot of pink!

The conference room looked like it came out of a little pony's brain… No, it was a little pony's brain. Who knew there existed so many different shades of pink? Even the windows were pink tainted glass. However, it seemed the early arrivals had gotten use to the, uhm… original choice of colors. Speaking of early arrivals:

Unexpected surprise # 2 (whether this one was good or bad remained undetermined): France, Italy (north and south) and Vatican were already there! How rare for them to be eager to start a meeting.

Unexpected surprise # 3: Poland had become a woman since the last time they saw each other. Not only that but he (she?) matched the room's furniture!

Unexpected surprise # 4 (and probable explanation to the unexpected surprise # 2): England was surprisingly shorter than Germany remembered. That impression may have originated in the fact he looked like a ten year old, it may have.

Luckily for the blonde's agitated heart, Russia was the same as always. Remind us how this could be considered lucky? Oh right, it couldn't. The german proceeded to the well known reflex of slapping oneself to wake up from a dream. Didn't work. Hit the head on the table? Success!... If the goal was to attract attention. What was there that could wake him up once and for all from this nightmare?

"It doesn't work." Informed Switzerland whom Germany had failed to notice "I tried… I tried."

"You went too far, onii-san!" scolded Liechtenstein with more worry than anger in her voice "If slapping does not work, shooting won't either." Sure enough, the small country was tending to a bullet wound lodged in the neutral nation's thigh.

Weren't weapons forbidden within the conference room?

"You know what? I don't even care anymore." The former axis power muttered to himself as he took his seat.

Just as he settled down, Belarus and Ukraine came in, setting the room in a tense atmosphere. Ukraine continued avoiding her younger brother like usual, but since the gaz wars between the two countries, Belarus' attitude towards had also taken a turn to the worst. She couldn't stop loving him of course and she would never bring herself to hate him but she remained confused to how she should really feel. The trust she had in her brother was shattered and she needed time to regain it.

Luckily, the atmosphere lightened up with the arrival of Austria and Hungary. Or so, Germany thought it would.

Unexpected surprise # 5: Austria greeted Russia without any negative feelings implied. That or he suddenly became the best actor ever.

Unexpected surprise # 6: Hungary greeted him too, only she sat next to him and tapped him in the back in a friendly gesture. She remains alive and uninjured to this very moment.

Needless to say, all eyes didn't fail to land on them.

They were only spared from the attention when more nations came in. All of them having the same reaction; open the door, stare in shock, awkwardly find a seat and someone to chat with.

Iceland was the last to arrive. He scanned the room and sighed. Norway was making gestures to indicate the free seat next to him and the Baltics – with whom he shared good relations – did the same as they were closer to the doors.

Unexpected surprise # 7: Out of the nine chairs he could have sat in, Iceland chose the one right next to Russia, earning a wink from Hungary.

Casualty # 1: near death experience for Finland who choked on his coffee.

Was Russia in fashion or something?

"Ahem." Germany called attention to himself "As usual, the meeting will start with simple questions that do not require voting or decision making. Anyone?" All eyes pointed to England and Russia but no one seemed to take the initiative, until Hungary's hand shot up. "Germany recognizes his friend Hungary."

"Well, it's a question I got from a human I met recently, I couldn't answer and I found it ironic cause nations are probably the only ones who know about this kind of stuff…"

"Get to the point." Complained Romano.

"Okay: Why are French fries called French fries if they're from Belgium?"

Awkward silence.

Denmark laughs.

Denmark laughs more.

Norway grabs Denmark's tie.

Denmark's head is acquainted with the table.

Norway tries pretending nothing happened.

No one buys it.

Then again, no one cares.

"It's probably the frog's fault." England huffed.

"Don't put the blame on me for everything, petit (literally 'small' but in this context 'kid')" France pouted "Besides, we call them frites in France which means fries, never once did we attach our country's name to them."

"Don't talk to me like I'm a child!" ordered the shrunken nation.

"But you are a child!" smirked Ireland before being repeatedly stabbed by his brother's glare.

"Don't feel offended," Spain chirped "Kids are cute!"

"ARE YOU SAYING I'M NOT CUTE, TOMATO BASTARD?" yelled everyone's favourite Italian tsundere.

"You'll always be a kid to me~" The Spaniard reassured.

"Doesn't that make you a paedophile?" wondered Portugal with a teasing grin.

"Are we seriously discussing this?" asked Cyprus "I know we're completely off-topic but really? French fries?"

"Ja , Maybe it is for the best to move on to more important matters." Agreed the one who was on the path to becoming the nations' babysitter.

"Wait!" Belgium cried "I'm interested in the answer!"

Germany sighed "Does anyone here know the answer to the question?"

"I do!" declared 'the Hero'.

"Oh, good, then plea – " started Ludwig before realizing something was not quite right "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE AMERICA?"

Unexpected surprise # 8: The United-States had apparently moved to Europe.

The superpower ignored the blonde's outburst and proceeded to explain "I named them like that because when I arrived in Belgium during World War I, but she spoke French so I thought 'I must be in France!' and TADAAAA!" the American turned to England and did what cost Denmark his consciousness. After a while he headed for the door "I just wanted to see if it was true that Iggy was a kid, see y'all!"

…

"That aside," Ludwig dismissed "Let's begin the meeting."

Little drops of fresh rain on a hot day? Electric shocks on a overheated heart is more accurate.

Casualty # 2: Germany's dream of a calm meeting.