All characters and character likenesses are copyright of C.S. Lewis and everyone affiliated with him and his estate. I only own parts of the plot and any miscellaneous characters I may introduce.

This is a heavily alternative universe based on the Chronicles of Narnia series, and I do not intend to offend any purists out there. Again, I own only parts of the plot.

Sorry this one took so long, I re-wrote it three times trying to get it right.

'Return to Gold' – Chapter 12 – Innocent Love

Caspian felt as if his blood was boiling, angry and disappointed in Aslan. He had found the woman that was his other half that completed his soul. Lucy balanced him in every way. She was quick, witty, brave and faithful, strengthening Caspian and guiding him in his darkest hours. Letting his protective side take over Caspian led Lucy back into the castle, drawing her away from the lion and the pain that He was inflicting on the two of them.

"Here." He held out a square of cloth to her, always carrying a 'hankie' with him. "You should dry your eyes."

"Thank you, Caspian." She whispered, accepting the soft cotton. He watched solemnly as she dried her tears and blew her nose with a blush. "Sorry."

"Don't be, I have plenty others and it can be washed." He reached out and ran a finger down her satiny soft cheek, feeling the dampness of her crying. "I just wish I could take your pain way, to make it all better."

"Convince Aslan to let me and the others stay in Narnia." She said wistfully as they continued to walk through the darkened halls of the ancient castle. "Make it to where you and I can be together forever, having our happily ever after."

Pain filled Caspian, wanting more than anything to make her dreams come true. He wanted all the dreams that filled him, the visions of what his life would be like with Lucy and her family becoming his family. He longed for the fellowship that would fill the castle, the sense of belonging, of home. Stopping in a spill of moonlight that fell though a tall window, Caspian gathered her into his arms. Lucy, with a small sniff, huddled close, trying to hide in his arms. He wished with all his heart he could open himself up and take her inside, hiding her away from Aslan's power.

"If I could, I would do it in a heartbeat." His voice was anguished as he tucked his head into the crook of her shoulder, breathing in her essence. He was trying to make memories for the eventuality that they would be ripped apart, suffering wounds too deep to heal. Lucy shuddered and hugged him tight, pressing close.

"I love you." He breathed into her skin, irrationally wanting to run away from the pressure that he felt, taking Lucy with him. But he knew that it wasn't an option, running not being a part of who he or Lucy was.

"I love you as well Caspian." Caspian felt her speak, her face pressed so tight to him that he could feel her lips moving and the warmth of her breath through the fabric of his shirt. Heat and lightning blazed though him, urging him to turn the situation into something more, something less than innocent. Everything in him clenched tight.

"I never expected to find you." Lucy continued, drawing Caspian's attention away from his darker desires. "I was just glad to be home. And yet, I found the man I could see myself loving, living my life with, having a family with."

Lucy felt safe and at home in Caspian's arms. Safe enough to tell him her deepest desires and dreams, telling him what she had only began to grasp herself. In the last day or so, she had begun to dream of being Caspian's wife and Queen. They would be happy, using each other to strengthen their ability to love and rule.

Lucy could see it, a return to gold, restoring Narnia to how it was when she and her siblings had been Kings and Queens. They would make the land warm and full of love and faith in Aslan, something that had withered into nothingness the day the Telmarines took over. Narnia, as well as Caspian and the people, would be made whole, becoming what they were always meant to be instead of the shadow of reality they were now. Everyone and everything would be realer, truer and complete because of Caspian's and Lucy's love for one another, that love pouring out to cover all of their kingdom.

"You surprised me as well." Caspian's voice was soft and velvet in the moonlit darkness, soothing her raw nerves. "I had hoped that I would defeat Miraz, saving my life, but you changed me. I was only thinking of myself, about what I wanted, not what was best for Narnia."

Lucy looked up into his face when he let out a gusty sigh, seeing how truly young and unsure he was about his future. Caspian was still growing, still learning who he was and what he was capable of. Lucy prayed she would be there by his side as he grew, helping him in any way she could.

"I didn't realize how much depended on my survival and Miraz's defeat. You and your siblings opened my eyes to how royalty should be, strong and loyal to his subjects above all things. I can never repay you for what you have done."

"There is nothing that we ask of you other than be the man and king you are destined to be, to rule the land and people we love with the same care and devotion that we did and still do." She reached up and cupped his cheek, feeling the rough stubble of his beard, shifting something inside her.

"Oh Lucy." Caspian sighed and dropped a quick kiss to her lips, tightening his hold on her. "I don't think I can do it without you and the others. You have made me who I am and balance my temper and naivety with your wisdom and experience."

"I have faith in you." She smiled up at him, feeling a gentle warmth expand in her chest. "It wouldn't be easy, but I know that you would be able to be the King Narnia deserves."

Suddenly a yawn took her by surprise, making her blink back the fatigue she felt. Caspian, with a heart meltingly endearing smile, turned and led her down the halls once again. It was a smile Lucy knew she would never forget, one so full of love that it made it hard for her to breathe. She would cherish the memory forever, holding it close to her heart once they were ripped apart.

"I think it is time the two of us retired for the night, it has been a long and exhausting day."

Lucy, slipping deeper into slumber with each step, sagged against Caspian's side, glad of the arm he had around her shoulders. His warmth was seeping into her, adding to the drowsiness that was beginning to fog her mind and make her eyes heavy. Warmth had always lulled her to sleep, something comforting about the sensation.

"Wake up Lu, we're here." His voice whispered into her ear, making her shiver as his breath slid against her skin. She heard him open her door before ushering her inside, eyes closed against the reality that their time together was growing short. Desperation made her ask,

"Stay with me?" She opened her eyes to see Caspian's reaction. She wasn't disappointed. He swallowed hard, breathing becoming deep, eyes turning a molten black as color crept into his high, strong cheeks.

Caspian gulped, mind racing.

"I'm sorry?" He cleared his throat, not quite sure he had heard right. Lucy smiled sleepily up at him, eyes big in the room only lit by a low burning fire in the fireplace. She was so beautiful that it took his breath away. Her beauty was golden and natural, similar to the beauty of Aslan and allure of Narnia's forests.

"I don't want you to go." Lucy slipped her hand into his, more trust in that small gesture than he could have imagined.

Caspian felt his resolve slipping. He knew that her request was innocent, but his reaction was anything but. His body roared to life, heat sweeping over him from head to toe, flushing him with heady desire. He gazed into her liquid eyes and tried to make her see reason.

"I have to go Lucy." He released his hold on her, taking an agonizing step back.

"Why?" She asked, face betraying her thoughts. She was afraid that he didn't want to be with her, having second thoughts about their relationship. She knew Susan was the more attractive of the two, and she feared that Caspian decided to chase after the black haired queen. His heart squeezed at her insecurity.

"If I stay, things will change forever." Caspian tried to explain without being crude. "I don't think I will be able to stop myself from sleeping with you. And I don't mean the two of us just lying in bed."

"Y-you mean…?" She struggled to say the words, a pretty blush coloring her cheeks spreading up from below the neck of her gown. How he wanted to trace the pink color, to see if the wave of warmth started at the base of her neck, or between her breasts.

"I would end up making love to you Lucy." Caspian said as bluntly as possible, holding her eyes with his own.

"Oh." Lucy blinked, expression adorable, a mix of curiosity and wonder. Deep inside he longed to tuck her into bed and draw the canopy drapes closed, shutting the world out as he gently showed her how much he loved her and wanted her. His chest was tight and his breathing labored as his temperature rose.

"Okay."

"What!?" Caspian felt his world tip wildly, reality spinning away and time seeming to come to a halt. Lucy was biting her lip, eyes telling him that she was ready to take that next step even though her hands were clasped in front of her. He ran a distracted hand though his hair, trying to figure out how to best handle the situation.

"Make love to me." She took a step closer to him, putting her with arm's length. "Give me this moment, this memory to have for the rest of my life. Let me experience this love so I can hold it close to my heart, to know that no matter what happens, we have each other."

"I can't, Lucy." He closed his eyes and hung his head, trying to block out her hopeful face and longing eyes. "I can't take that from you without giving you marriage in return."

"When I go back, I go back as a child." Lucy sighed. Her hand slipped into his, tugging and making him look at her. "Everything is restored, everything."

"Still, I don't want to risk it." Caspian was forced to think of every possibility to spare them even more heart ache. "What if I get you with child only to have you lose it when you cross back over?"

"What if my being pregnant is what keeps me here?" She countered, desperation creeping into her voice.

"And what about your family?" He returned. "What would be keeping them here?"

She looked away, eyes coming to rest on the low burning fire to their side. He could see the reflection of tears in her eyes. He hated to cause her pain, to dash her hopes, to deny them what they really wanted. But her protection was more important to him than satisfying their carnal lusts.

Lucy cursed fluently in her mind, frustrated at the fact that Caspian was right. He was being the man she was proud to say that she loved, noble and protective. Her heart burned with the hope that he would give in and let them share their love in the most intimate way possible. Her mind raced, afraid that he would still deny her, leaving her to spend her last night home alone in a cold bed, dreaming of the life they should be sharing.

"You are right." Tears forced their way down her cheeks. "Aslan would be so disappointed in me. Love is for marriage. I just wish we were married and could be together in all ways forever."

"It amazes me that even now you still have faith in Him." Caspian said in an awed and impressed tone.

"I can't not have faith in Him." Lucy told him. "There is just something inside me that rebels at the thought of turning my back on Him even for a moment. Even as I feel heartbroken and disappointed in the situation He has put us in, I still know that he will do what is best for us all in the end."

"I wish I had your faith Lucy." He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, touch gentler than anything she had ever felt before. "You are so strong. You are a rock in a storm, drawing me into your calm, sheltering me.

"And I'm spouting poetry again."

Lucy laughed a watery laugh, the coiling tension around them shattering, leaving them on comfortable ground. Her heart felt light again, and she made a different request.

"I still want you to stay with me." She watched his face firm, resolve in his expression. "I just want you to hold me. I don't want to be alone."

Caspian took a deep breath, reading her thoughts in her eyes before sighing. Softly he took her hand and led her over to the bed, helping her onto the high feather mattress after she kicked off her shoes. He slipped off his boots before rounding the bed and climbing in on the other side. As he settled onto his back she curled up against his side, draping an arm over his chest as she tucked her head onto his shoulder.

"Thank you." She whispered, eyes falling closed as sleep returned on the heels of his warmth. "I wanted us to have some time together before I have to leave."

"I wanted this time as well." He murmured, hand stroking up and down her arm, holding her close. "Sleep love, and pray that Aslan's will is good."