Author's Note: Hi! Again, at the beginning, I want to thank everyone for the lovely and encouraging reviews and all the story alert as well as favourites. Without it, it would be harder to write :). The fact that you like how I portray characters, Izaya, makes me very happy.

Now, the chapter is focusing more on conversation than thoughts and describing feelings this time, but hope you'll like it still. Ad the best is still ahead of us, I believe! ;D

Cold War Kids – Something Is Not Right with Me

"Something is not right with me

How was I supposed to know?

Something was not right with me

Trying not to let it show"

"Two days ten hours and thirty-five minutes..." I said as a greeting, leering at Shinra's surprised face.

"What?" he asked simply.

"Two days ten hours and thirty-five... no, thirty-six minutes is how long you have been deprived from my blessed presence. Missed me?" I ducked under his outstretched arm to enter the apartment.

He swirled around to face me, a trace of discomfort passing over his features.

"Not really. I've been rather busy, you see... Why are you here?" he enquired directly.

"Why, you ask... Isn't it obvious...? My blood summoned me! I couldn't help but follow its call. One of despair, might I add." I laughed darkly, looking around the room for possible signs of someone else being in it not long ago.

"Yes, really, very amusing, Izaya... If you have no real business here, then you can as well leave." Shinra replied, motioning the front door that was still opened.

Now that was interesting! Why was Shinra so set on getting rid off me as fast as possible? Something wasn't right. Poor Shinra, now that I became curious there was no way he would have an easy task...

"I don't think so, Shinra. I'd rather not. Say... The last time I was here, you were adamant on me staying and now you don't want me here at all? Something stinks here... quite badly. You're sure you don't want to fill me in?" I asked, observing him intently. I could let him away with a lie, but I wasn't going to be dismissed by him. People do not do that with me. Even if it's Shinra...

He must have came to the same conclusion, because he sighed and quietly closed the door.

"You will be the death of me eventually. I can't comprehend why I'm even putting up with you and your quirks..."

"I really don't think that you're the one to talk... You live with a headless non-human being and make it your live-mission to inform everyone about your deep love for it. You're an underground doctor and your hobby is to dissect every breathing creature if it somehow differs from what most see as a norm, or at best experiment with it if dissecting is not an option... I wouldn't be surprised if you made some unnecessary examinations just to check how Shizu-chan works while you had a chance..." I pointed with a finger at him, a self-satisfactory smile appearing on my face.

"Celty is not an 'it'!" he exclaimed hotly.

"The fact that it was the only thing you could find fault in sums it up very nicely!" I laughed.

"Whatever... And you are here because...?" he changed the topic. If this was his inversion plan then it wasn't working on me.

"I have a small package for Celty to deliver. I was near and thought, why not to give it to her now instead of meeting somewhere in the city. I value my time." I let him think that he'd won for a moment.

"She's not available, but I can pass it on to her. I swear I won't look what it is, so... You said you value your time, it seems like a good solution, doesn't it?" he asked hopefully, stretching his hand out, ready to take the package.

"Shinra, Shinra, Shinra... Who do you think I am? You're supposed to know me and yet you're trying such a lousy excuse?" I clicked my tongue at him. "What's going on? If you're not conspiring against me then I don't see why you're so desperate to hide it from me..."

He bit his lip, looking at me uncertainly. And when he finally opened his mouth to speak up, a loud groan emitted from within the apartment.

Oh... So that's what made him so edgy. Shizu-chan woke up from his slumber... coma, or whatever it was. It made my eyebrows rise in an unspoken question.

"He regained his consciousness the morning after you've left. I don't think he should know you're here..." Shinra admitted in a hushed voice. Why only now he chose to lower his voice was above me...

"Were you thinking that I'd barge into his room and try cutting him with my switch-blade? Were is the fun in that if Shizu-chan can't response to the provocation?"

"How could I not have thought about it..." Shinra responded sarcastically. "Who I'm more concerned about is actually Shizuo, not you this time. We both know he's not very... fond of you. He would be restless at best. With his temper, he will try choking you with bare hands despite his injuries and I can't let him exert his body."

"That's priceless, Shinra! Priceless!" I laughed loudly, imagining Shizu-chan throwing a fit in a hospital gown, not being able to do much more than glare daggers at me.

His incapacity to lay a single finger on me would've drive him mad! Like a child in front of a sweets shop, but without a single yen in his pocket. And I would stand in front of him, not having to dodge a blow or look out for flying vending machines, just pissing him off with my mere presence... I could now understand what was Shinra worried about. It was almost too sweet to resist... Was I going to walk away without giving it a try? I was able to restrain myself, wasn't I...? I was.

However, for Shinra's bad luck, I didn't really want to...

"Great! Now that you had your laugh, you can leave and spare me any unwanted problems. Off you go!" he pushed me not so delicately into the door's direction.

"I'm sorry, Shinra, but that's just too much you're asking of me... You can't stop the hero from collecting his prize, ne~? Now we'll be even, though." I wriggled myself out of his weak hold and stormed were I knew Shizuo was resting.

I easily reached the room before Shinra and stepped in without a second thought. I was so excited at the prospect of interacting with Shizu-chan... So many things to tease him about! A catheter for example. I was sure he had one! I felt like during Christmas before I even started!

I opened my mouth with a true intent of voicing a mordacious greeting remark and then closed it again.

"I was right about you being the death of me..." Shinra said, turning up behind my back finally, his voice void of any specific emotion. There was a short silence and he spoke again. "It's a sad picture, isn't it?"

"Sad? Why would it be? He has the damned leg!" I snickered, though somehow quieter than usually.

"It's sad seeing him so quiet, lifeless, weak... It's not Shizuo like that, just a shell."

"Bullshit! You said that he has been conscious since Saturday and now you're talking about him like he still was in a coma or without some vital part of his body. Stop being so dramatic, it's making me sick... I thought that he woke up and it looks like he intends to sleep for at least a week non-stop without batting a single eyelash..." I muttered out, irritated at everyone in the room suddenly.

At the idiotic brute who dared to sleep when I wanted to piss him off, at Shinra spilling sentimental nonsense and at myself, as I shouldn't have felt put off by the sight of this protozoan's battered body.

I should have laughed like I did just before coming into his room. And I would have, if he was looking at me with his angered eyes. They stayed closed, however, all I could focus on was the rest of him and somehow the laugh died in my throat before it even started.

What was different? What was fucking different from when I saw him under the fire escape, with the fractured bone comically sticking out of his torn trousers and blood covering his face? He reminded a broken toy more than ever and yet I managed to laugh like a maniac. Now he was clean, his head bandaged and the more severe cuts covered with gauze and I was standing like a fucking sissy not able to take my joy in it? This was preposterous! This was not me! Not the Orihara Izaya that everybody known, that I knew...!

My eyes landed on the brute's left leg that was somehow exposed in the process from under the blanket he was covered with. The gown he was wearing hidden only half of his thigh and I could see a part of a metal screw visible at the side of it. There were probably more... I clenched my teeth and cleared my throat. All of this was enormous bullshit!

"He will have a nasty scar on that leg of his, poor Shizu-chan! Now people will fear him more than they already do!" I recovered from this unusual moment of weakness.

"I don't think he will exactly walk around the city with his pants down... Save if you somehow make him lose them..." Shinra corrected.

"Ne~! You're putting some naughty ideas into my head, Shinra! I must remember it! I will make a photo and then millions of copies to spread around the city! You can be so smart without trying sometimes, Shinra!" I laughed and the sound was like a balm applied to a burnt hand. It calmed me and made almost sigh with contentment.

"A devil incarnated, that's what you are..." Shinra stated blandly.

"At least I don't have to spend my money for a vacation in tropics. I'll be always nice and warm." I stuck my tongue out. I had great humour suddenly!

"You know what, just put your plan into effect. I'm actually pretty sure that it will find Shizuo a fun-club full of women ready to ease his tremendous pain in any possible way... Maybe you don't see it because of your hatred for him, but he isn't exactly an ugly duckling and most of women love to treat wounded ones, I assure you... You'll only make him a favour." This time Shinra stuck out his tongue at me.

I couldn't help but laugh again.

"And I bet you forgot that I'm an irreplaceable and infallible informant! Because of that I know that Shizu-chan already has a quite large fun-club consisting of women who perceive him as a crude brute who can be civilised to the point where he will play their Tarzan and they could be Jane, if you know what I mean..." I snickered. "What is more interesting, Shizuo seems not at all aware of it, as if he was totally blind to the lone, needy looks he's being given by some of the females on the streets. Personally, I think he is just naturally dense and can't sense flirting even if someone is virtually hanging on his neck. So, I don't think that more members to the already existing fun-club will do him any good!" I ended with a happy announcement.

"Christ, do you know more about him then he himself?" Shinra asked incredulously.

"It may be... I'm just good at doing my job." I shrugged my shoulders.

"I won't deny what is obvious... Although it sounds a bit stalker-ish... It's a miracle that you didn't wake him with your constant tattle, though... Must be the drugs..." Shinra said more to himself than to me now, entering the room and changing the flow of the drip that the protozoan was hooked to."

"It must be some strong shit that you're pumping into him, because he seems to have a primary instinct telling him that I'm near and I don't think that being asleep would dull it normally. Just like a freaking animal, one would think that I reek of something... I hardly have time to put my feet on one of Ikebukuro's streets and he is already shouting my name with a sign ready to kill me in his hand." I recalled.

"It's just some tramadol to ease his pain and a dose of antiphlogistic antibiotics. Nothing above the norm, believe me..." Shinra reassured.

"What did he say when he woke up?" I asked at last, observing Shinra taking Shizu-chan's life parameters.

"Hmm...?" Shinra hummed somewhat absently. "Oh, not much, the usual... He wanted to know what happened and where is he. He's still weak, so he falls in and out of sleep constantly. I don't think he realises your part in the whole ordeal if that's what you're asking... And do you know that you actually smiled while talking about him trying to molest you with the help of a street sign...?" he inquired quite amused, not bothering to look at my reaction.

"I smiled, because it reminded me how I was able to rile him up without especially trying to... and always got away with it... You comment on the most irrelevant things on the other hand. And I don't appreciate that specific usage of words also. You had to go with 'molest' with all the possible ones... You're doing it on purpose, I'm certain, just remember that I don't wait for Karma to go around, I simply make it happen... And I wouldn't let Shizu-chan molest me even if my life depended on in. My body is a temple and I don't want it fouled." I put stress on the last word. I was apparently the time to end my visit as Shinra started to play on my nerves. He and his silly comments...

"Always so dramatic...! Don't worry, I think it is the one thing Shizuo would agree with you on. Probably the only one also... And now, unless you want to give him a sponge bath, you can go and take care of your own 'temple'."

"Ne~, here you go again, Shinra! Always with an immoral proposition or suggestion... You insist on corrupting me so strongly that I start fearing for my chastity!" I cried in false indignation. "It's better that I leave your demoralized company before it will be too late! But first things first, I can't leave without properly saying goodbye to the brute!" I announced to anybody in particular.

"Right, okay. Only, nothing stupid...!" Shinra warned me.

"You're no fun, Kishitani-sensei..." I complained, but came to the side of Shizu-chan's bed despite his words. "Ne~, Shizu-chan, don't miss me too much while I'm gone, I'll find some time to vex you later, don't worry! It's a promise!" And I was really going to fulfil it, how could I not? Then, intending to end my visit on that jolly note I patted his head lightly, as if to reassure him, though it was a clear mockery. If he was only aware of it... Ahh... Not everything could be perfect...

However, before I had a chance to move away from the bed, not to even mention the room, Shizuo growled painfully in his throat and I could see his eyelids flutter.

"Uups...?" was my only reaction to Shinra's half-angered, half-scared glare.