OKAY, here is a super-shortchapter for all of you. It deals with Dean finally revealing what the hell is wrong with him. I know a lot of people wanted to know.
disclaimer- i own nothing.
a/n: i may have taken some liberties with how long a sedative keeps you asleep. Sorry, but I think it will be good for the drama-angst in the next chapters.
chapter 23
Deans mind, in the face of his fathers veiled threat, went blank. For once in his life he could not think of what to say. Possible solutions came into his mind, sure. Nearly 12 years of
hustling had seen to it that he had an excellent bank on hand if he should ever need them. However, each one of them died on his lips. He did not want to lie to his dad. Heck, he
was not even sure that his dad would believe him.
John frowned at Dean. He turned and looked over to the nurses station and then around the room. Dean knew he was looking for his doctor. John finally found him, three beds
down talking to the family of a girl. He looked calm and sympathetic. Dean saw the older woman he was talking to, the girls mother he guessed, clap her hand to her face and burst
into tears. The older man beside her tightened his grip around her arm.
Dean wondered what they had just been told. John contented himself with trying to catch the mans eye. When that did not work, he raised himself slowly from his seat. He looked
at Dean as if to say- this is your last chance.
Go ahead! Dean met his gaze calmly. John clucked softly. He made it three steps before Dean, haggerdly uttered "Stop dad."
John turned and was slightly scared by the tansformation. Deans confidence was draining out of him. He could see his face becoming paler. Fear radiated off him.
"Why son?" JOhn moved back to his seat anyway. Looking at Dean and seeing the change, made him believe he was probably going to need to sit down..
"I'll tell you." Deans eyes flickered down to his hands. John noted this. His son never refused to look him in the eye-ever, even when he was a kid.He resisted the urge to hug Dean,
instead he asked,
"So you are saying to me that you lied before?"
Dean nodded slowly.
"Why son?" John tried to make his voice as gentle as possible and avoid lacing it with the fear he felt.
"It was not real then. I could control it." Deans voice was heavy. John wondered if his son was crying. John moved closer. He gently squeezed Deans shoulder.
"Then tell me son. What is wrong with you?"
Dean looked up. His eyes were bright. He looked at John briefly and gave him a small smile. John nodded encouragingly. Dean looked away. He picked a spot on the far wall and
began talking to that.
"You already know, at least you partly know. The demon-bitch who was with me after the crash fed me all these drugs. According to the doc, this forced me into several heart
attacks." JOhn nodded in confirmation.
"Apparently these attacks damaged my heart even more than they thought.The condition I've got, the doc called it something, I can not remember though," Dean stopped and took
a breath. When he started again, his voice was filled with emotion. It sounded like every word he spoke hurt him.
"To fix it, I have to see if I am eligible to get a machine in my heart. A machine! And i may not even get that. I..might have to get a transplant...someone elses heart, inside of me."
John was stunned into silence. Dean looked at him. He was completely vulnerable. John could see his fear, his loyalty, his anger and his confusion. He was looking at John waiting
for him to answer.
"Oh son" John managed after a second.
"Dean."
Oh please no! He prayed. He looked over.Sam was awake, bleary eyed but awake.
His family knew now. Dean knew that he should feel relived. All he felt was tired.