CHAPTER 10

Edward yawned and scratched his head. He'd just gotten his wakeup call and fumbled for his phone. As much as he wanted to, it was too early in the day to call Bella, but family was a different story. Emmett answered on the second ring.

"Where the fuck have you been?"

"And it's good to hear your voice as always Emmett, what's up?"

"Dude, we've been calling and calling. What's wrong, are your arms painted on or something? Couldn't you pick up the phone?"

"I don't know if you've noticed," replied Edward drowsily, "but I'm working. Things are hell busy and I haven't been able to call you guys at any time that's remotely sociable."

"Just as long as that's all you've been doing."

"What are you talking about?"

There was a long gusty sigh over the phone line.

"I swear Edward, for a famous guy you've really got your head up your own ass sometimes."

"Cut the flattery and dammit Emmett, just tell me!" Edward's morning haze was wearing off as he started to get annoyed at his brother.

"Are you doing Tanya?"

"What?" Edward sat bolt upright.

"Oh god, not you too," he said, falling back onto the bed with his free hand rubbing the furrow that had formed between his brows.

"Whaddya mean 'not me too'? Dude, there are pictures everywhere of you two getting cosy in the street, having dinner together .. all sorts of shit." Emmett's voice dropped. "I don't have to tell you just how pissed Rosalie is."

"Screw Rosalie."

"Oh I do, and man, ….. but that conversation is for another time…. "

"Emmett! Cut the crap and just tell me everything that you know."

So Emmett talked, and Edward listened.

"… and so now you know why we've been calling you so much," finished Emmett. He had talked at length, even going to far as to read out some of the articles to Edward over the phone."

Edward couldn't speak. By now he was sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. He groaned.

"Just tell me, is any of this even remotely true?" asked Emmett after Edward stayed silent.

"Of course none of it's true!" Edward barked. "Jesus, what sort of guy do you think I am?"

"Well you know they've written articles like these before, and some of it's turned out to be true."

"Yeah," retorted Edward, "but two of those became full on relationships that didn't involve any break-ups with third parties, and the third one was when she was cheating on me on her film set, remember?"

"Oh yeah, I'd forgotten about that. Sorry."

"If you've forgotten about it, chances are everyone else has too." Edward sighed. He picked despondently at the bed sheets.

"Speaking of everyone else," Emmett continued, "How's Bella taking this?"

Silence.

"Uh … Edward?" Hearing nothing, Emmett continued. "Bro, tell me you've at least spoken to Bella about this." Emmett paused.

Edward still hadn't replied.

"Oh fuck. If you didn't know about this," Emmett said in a quiet tone, "Then you wouldn't have known to talk to her about it, huh."

"Right." Edward's tone was even quieter.

"So what are you going to do?"

Edward took a deep sigh and rubbed a hand over his eyes, he could feel a headache starting.

"I don't know what I can do."

"You could call her for a start." Emmett said in a stern tone. "Dude, don't make me tell Rose that you're stalling …" this was said as a warning.

"I'm not stalling! It's just … " Despite the fact that Emmett couldn't see him, Edward waved his arm to encompass his hotel room, script updates and clothes scattered everywhere. "Shit, I've just got so much going on, time isn't on my side at all."

"Fuck Edward, when are you going to grow up? Are you seriously going to tell me that whatever bit of celluloid you're working on is more important than anything else?"

"No," said Edward, insulted. Emmett had never attacked his career like this before. "But I'm not saying that my time is more important than anyone else's. There are a shitload of people working on this film, I can't drop everything each time some fucking magazine wants to make up a story about me."

Emmett sighed.

"I know Edward, I know. But there's nothing wrong with doing something for yourself now and then."

"I'm listening."

"Look, are you interested in Bella at all?"

"Now more than ever. Listen," he hesitated, "can I be honest?"

"Always bro."

"I … well … that is to say."

"Just say it."

"Well, Bella and I haven't … " another awkward pause, "you know."

"Yeah I know. What of it?"

"It's just that I don't know where our relationship is at. There's certainly attraction, but we didn't get a chance to talk anything through before we both got involved with work."

"And?" Emmett prompted.

"So I don't know what the hell is going on between us."

"Well," said Emmett after a considered pause, "seems to me you've got to do something to find out."

"Yeah."

"Have you guys been in touch lately?"

"No," Edward replied. "She sent me an email last week to say she'd be going quiet for a while."

"Why was that?"

"I don't know."

"Hang on, Rose is here. I'm gonna bring her up to speed and call you back. You going to be there for a while?"

"Yeah, but not long. I'm due on set soon. I'll shower and grab some breakfast, so call me back in about twenty."

"Deal."

o * o * o * o

Edward reached for the phone, his hair wet and curling against his collar.

"Emmett?"

"It's Rose."

Edward sat down and kept towelling his hair.

"Hey Rose. So you know everything?"

"Yeah. Now I've got some questions for you."

Here it comes, thought Edward, and mentally braced for impact.

"So, I hear that you and Bella haven't been in touch for a while."

"True," agreed Edward, "but that's from both sides."

"Mmm-hmm. And Bella emailed you saying she wouldn't be in touch for a while. What did she say? I want the exact words."

Edward had been expecting this, and had his laptop ready. He scrolled through his inbox, and read out the email. When he finished reading, Rose was silent.

"Edward, when did Bella send you that email?"

"Last Wednesday, why?"

"The first article about you and Tanya came out on the Monday. Chances are she's seen it too."

Edward threw his towel across the room, flinching when it knocked a lamp off one of the bedside tables. He'd have to clean that up before he left for the day.

"It would seem that you have a bit of a problem here Cullen. You're on a film that you can't get away from, and there's an incredible woman on the other side of the country that thinks you're screwing someone else."

"I know." Edward groaned. "How do I handle this?"

"You'd better start praying that she hasn't found someone else," Rose warned.

Shit. He hadn't thought of that. The band. Jacob.

The silence that hung on the other end of the phone caused Rosalie's voice to soften. "Listen Edward, putting aside the fact that Emmett and I both think Bella's sensational, even a blind man would be able to see that you're mad for her too."

"Is it that obvious?"

"We've never seen you as happy as you've been since she came on the scene." She paused. "Even if the two of you are still finding your way, you'd both be fools if you didn't try to find your path together. You seem to be so good for each other."

Another moment of silence followed as Rosalie gave him time to process what she had said.

"You're right, " said Edward quietly.

Rose snorted. "Took you long enough to work that out."

"I just wish I knew what she wanted."

o * o * o * o

"No!" Bella scrambled out of Jacob's embrace, away from the kisses that a few moments before, she had been returning enthusiastically. She stood up.

"What's wrong? I thought that maybe you would be okay with this."

Bella sighed, and ran shaky hands down her jean-clad thighs.

"I'm sorry Jacob, I thought I was too."

Jacob stared at her for a moment, and then picked up his drink and took a swig.

"Well, I can't say that I'm not disappointed," he finally allowed.

Jacob looked up at Bella where she stood, and she gazed back. He was a good man. Nothing wrong with him at all. Any woman who be happy to be with him. Bella moved towards the sofa where they had been sitting.

o * o * o * o

Thinking back to after the gig the night before, Bella had been astounded at just how much alcohol she and Jacob had consumed. What had started with a couple of beers had continued with Jaegermeister, and ended with Tequila. The gig might have finished for the evening, but the club partied on. By the time even the hardiest patrons had left, the bar owner was kicking back with Bella and the members of Wolf Pack, loudly singing along with the jukebox.

She remembered giggling, and stumbling against Jacob who had seemed only too happy to catch her before she could fall.

She also remembered dancing with Jacob – after much protesting on her part – and when the spinning of the room became too much, snuggling her head against his chest. He had smelled of sweat, smoke and tequila, and an underlying male musk scent that had only served to remind her of Edward. Instinctively she had closed her eyes and snuggled closer, too drunk to notice that Jacob had tightened his arms around her.

Mercifully, Bella had woken up in bed, shoeless but still clothed, and very much alone. The only thing keeping her company – much to her regret – was a monumental hangover. She rolled over groaning with agony to see two ibuprofen tablets beside a glass of water, and a note from Jacob saying that they would talk in the morning. The two of them had a conversation that had been carried out in pained whispers, before meeting at the café and consuming a breakfast that seemed to contain enough grease to deep fry a cow.

For the rest of the day, they had been careful to do as little as possible, other than enduring the teasing of the rest of the band. Bella had smiled and taken the ribbing with good humour, and Jacob had given as good as he got, keeping a protective arm around her shoulders whenever he felt the teasing was getting too much.

She hadn't gone near her laptop.

Thankfully there had been no gig that evening, so the band had enjoyed a rare respite on the tour. The rest of the band had whooped it up at the club, while Jacob and Bella had decided to get an evening meal together. They also seemed to have the common urge to drink a small lake as part of their recovery process.

o * o * o * o

To:Bella Swan

From:Edward Cullen

Subject:Thinking of you

Bella

I need to start this by saying I'm sorry. You said you were going quiet for a while, and my filming schedule has been insane. Every time I've wanted to call you, I know you'd already be asleep.

I miss your voice.

I miss your emails.

I miss you.

Edward

Sitting next to Jacob, Bella tried to put her thoughts into words.

"Jake, you're a great guy …" she began.

Jacob groaned and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes briefly before he looked back at her.

"Don't tell me, I'm a great guy but you want someone else."

"It was that obvious?"

He sighed, and then sat up again to clasp her hands in his.

"It wasn't obvious until I put you to bed last night. We were kissing … and it was great … "

"We were? It was?" Bella's face blanched. She didn't remember that at all.

"Yeah well it was for me." Jacob sighed.

He had been biding his time all week. After the pictures of Edward had surfaced he had watched Bella retreat into herself. He had been relieved when she had agreed to watch the gig, happy to be able to look through the crowd and see her there, singing along with the songs, dancing and cheering with the rest of the crowd. The tour had them all feeling exhausted and dislocated from their usual routines, but Bella's presence had been a constant they had all appreciated. Jacob especially liked having her there. She made him feel anchored.

Bella stared at him, her mind frantically trying to remember what had happened but coming up with nothing.

"Jake, I'm really sorry … but I can't remember."

"And I'm really sorry that I do." Jake gave her a rueful grin. "Babe, you're amazing. You really are, but I don't know that my ego is ever going to recover from you calling out the wrong name."

Bella's face went white.

o * o * o * o

To:Bella Swan

From:Edward Cullen

Subject:I miss you

Bella

I really miss you. Can I call you? There are things that need to be said.

Edward

o * o * o * o

"Hey c'mon Bells, things didn't go that far" Jacob continued, reaching out to grab her shoulder.

Unfortunately. He thought.

"We didn't? I mean … that is to say … I woke up still dressed."

"Yeah, that was me. I did the honourable thing. I put you to bed after .. " Jacob grimaced, "you called me by the wrong name."

"Oh." She said in a small voice, and then continued after a moment's pause. "Did I really do that?

Jacob gave her an exasperated look.

"Jesus, Bells give me a break. Am I really going to have to spell it out for you?"

"No, I don't think so." She replied.

Jacob rubbed her shoulder gently.

"Look Bells, I really like you. More than just like you if I'm going to be honest, but my self esteem isn't going to take being rebound guy."

"And you should never have to be Jake." Bella gave him a resigned smile. "I think I can guess what name I called you, but Ed-"

"Uh uh uh" Jacob held up a warning hand. "Just because I heard it last night doesn't mean I want to hear it again."

Bella risked a small chuckle, and was heartened with Jake gave her a droll smile in response. His feelings were hurt, but he seemed resigned to the situation. She started again.

"He who shall not be named, and I, hadn't reached any conclusion about what was going on between us."

"Maybe not, but I think you have."

"Yeah, I guess, maybe so," she replied, slowly nodding her head.

"Figures." Jacob commented as he took her hands in his and clasped them gently. "I find a woman who reminds me about the tribal heartbeat that I've been following my whole life, only then to find, that her heart beats for someone else."

o * o * o * o

To:Edward Cullen

From:Bella Swan

Subject:RE: I miss you

Edward

I miss you too, and we definitely need to talk. I've seen some pictures of you lately – okay, a lot of pictures – of you lately that knocked me for a spin.

I'm going to be honest here, and say that what I saw had me feeling pretty upset.

Then I got jealous, and then I stuck my head in the sand.

I know that there are two sides to every story, and I guess, as yet, I haven't heard yours..

I miss you.

I miss your voice.

Please call.

Bella

o * o * o * o

Bella sat staring at the screen for a long time, and then clicked 'send'. She watched the email transmit, and then picked up her cell phone to dial a familiar number. After a few rings, it answered.

"Angela? I'm coming home."

o * o * o * o