"Hi Hannah!" She spoke brightly as she knocked. "Great weather we've been having isn't it?"
Hannah barely glanced in her direction. Apparently she didn't deem Elizabeth enough of a threat to warrant more than a cursorily glance. Inwardly Elizabeth bristled at the notion of not being a threat. She was the master of dodge ball. Give her a rubber ball and she would show She-Rah over there something to fear.
"So obviously Anna hired you for your conversational skills." Elizabeth grumbled under her breath, impatiently shifting from one foot to the next. "Come on girls, I know you are in there."
"Quit pestering Hannah." Robin cooed in a sickeningly sweet voice. Hannah glared at her. Contact! Mission accomplished. "Come on in. I apologize for the mess." The mess that Courtney had been wreaking on their poor loft all morning. Robin had been relieved when Bobbie showed up and took Morgan from her last night, saying that Lance wanted him to spend the night. She knew she had made the right decision in letting him stay over there.
Elizabeth looked around the loft in shock as she made her way in. "Did a natural disaster occur? Do I need to organize a star studded telethon for you?"
"Don't. Please." Robin murmured to her. "Courtney is in a really bad mood."
"I'm not deaf Robin Scorpio!" Courtney snapped from the kitchen.
"Still pissed about the date with Patrick thing is she?" Elizabeth asked. SLAM! Courtney slammed a cabinet in the kitchen so hard; the other two women could hear the glasses shake in the sink.
"Not just that. She called my phone and got him instead."
"Oh that doesn't sound good at all."
"Enough about that. Tell me about Lucky."
Elizabeth pushed off some discarded clothes off the couch and onto the floor. "Well we finally talked."
"Is that why you're avoiding my gaze?" Robin challenged. "Because you talked each other into utter madness?"
"I'm avoiding an 'I told you so.'"
"I'll hold off on it then. So, what happened?"
"Well after he realized his mother cornered me at the park..."
"Cornered you? Why would Laura...oh she has high hopes for you then." Robin realized giving her friend an unwelcome wink.
"Why do I tell you anything?" Elizabeth asked throwing up her hands.
"Because I am the voice of reason." Robin declared arrogantly.
"Says she who is dating her ex-brother-in law." Another slam echoed from the kitchen.
"Guilty." Robin shot her eyes to the kitchen. No noise accompanied her admission.
"That's scary. At least when she's slamming things we know she's not sharpening knives or something." Elizabeth whispered.
"Back to Lucky. How exactly did you work things out? Don't give me that look. I don't mean anything dirty by it. Really, Elizabeth." Robin patronized with an eye-roll.
"Sure you didn't." Elizabeth returned with an eye-roll of her own. "Well after he figured out why I was avoiding him, he cornered me in my classroom."
"And made you talk to him? Good boy." Robin clapped.
"Oh he did a lot more than make me talk about that with him."
"I'll take the bait. What happened?"
"Like a babbling lunatic I told him everything about Max and how that fiasco ended."
"How did that go? Did he agree that Max is a son of a bitch?"
"The word asshole and bastard was repeated a few times and I'm 75 sure he's planning on possibly running him over with a car the next time he has to go to Boulder."
"Can I go too? I'd like to give that prick a piece of my mind." Robin insisted.
"Sure. You can make sure that he doesn't go out and kill like I'm 25 sure he's thinking about. I hear it really sucks visiting people you date in jail."
"Yeah." Robin agreed knowing all about that.
"So after that then I decided to take the plunge and tell him I'd seen him and Daphne."
"And? And?" Robin prodded.
"He dragged me to his office, talked in freaking code the entire time, and then set me up to meet her and her boyfriend."
"I don't give Lucky enough credit." Robin giggled.
"And the worst part is she's nice, and sweet, and just about the cutest thing that ever walked the Earth. God help me I like her. It would be so much easier to be mad at him about this if I could hate her."
"So it was all publicity scam...like I said?" Robin would never tire of being right. Now that she was dating Patrick, she knew she had to take what she could get.
"Go ahead and say it. I know you are just dancing in your seat over there to do it."
"I told you! Talking is the key!"
"Well it does lead a person to use time productively."
"What did you do with the rest of your evening? If you don't mind me asking." Robin asked.
"I'll just say that I really hate his secretary."
"What did she do?" Robin pried though she could guess.
"I think she's in cahoots with my grandmother. And the driver of that car." Elizabeth huffed, falling back on the couch with her arms crossed. "It's a conspiracy I tell you."
"Were you wearing clothes?" Robin wondered, not missing the shocked gasp she got from her friend. "Okay, I guess you were."
"Enough about my frustration. It just leads me to getting all pissy again. Not good. So what happened to turn this place into World War III?"
"Oh, where should I begin? Patrick took me to Santa Monica for our date." Robin replied.
"Santa Monica?" Elizabeth's eyebrows shot up. "Damn that's impressive."
"I think it was all for show. You know, I think he was trying to one-up Lucky. You know how men are." Robin glanced over at the kitchen. "Courtney, you okay?" Her roommate grunted in response. "Anyway, it was incredible. He was so sweet."
"I love being the beneficiaries of a pissing contest between men. We must continue to compare notes. But please explain said sweetness."
"Well, I hadn't ever been on a rollercoaster and I was a little scared..."
"So he held your hand the entire time? Or did he re-enact the roller coaster scene from Fear?"
"He held my hand and distracted me with talk about the hotel's spa." Robin grinned.
Nodding her head approvingly, Elizabeth smiled. "Very good. Continue."
"We made it to the aquarium and then this little bastard of a crab clamped onto my finger--"
"And Patrick had to clamp onto it in other ways to make it all better?" Elizabeth gasped, keeping one eye carefully on Courtney to duck any flying lethal weapons.
"He pulled me into the corner and we started making out. We barely made it back to the hotel." Robin remembered, unintentionally blushing.
"Does anybody listen to me? No. Damn Patrick could have some kind of fungal disease." They heard Courtney mutter.
"Getting that hot in public? Girl you could have scared the fish and children with that action." Elizabeth pointed out laughing.
"There were no children!" Robin responded in a harsh whisper.
"That you saw."
"Oh." Robin covered her eyes with each of her hands. "It was his fault really."
Out of the corner of Elizabeth's eye she could see Courtney roll her eyes with such force it was a wonder her head didn't snap off. "That would be a violation of the code that it is always their fault Robin. You better be prepared to defend such a blatant shift of reality."
"I might have had something to do with it, but he started it." Robin countered.
"Well yes we figured that one out all on our own." Elizabeth snorted. Robin couldn't even bring herself to admit she wanted Patrick the last time she was over here and she thought for one second everyone wouldn't think she started it? Please.
"We got back to the room and everything was moving so fast--"
Elizabeth clapped her hands as Courtney covered her ears muttering, "I don't want to hear this. I don't need to be traumatized."
"Would you rather we saved this for when you have to leave for work?" Robin offered. Courtney stuck out her tongue and slammed a few more cabinet doors. "I won't go into it, but the only reason we didn't sleep together was because of Patrick." Robin hoped she had said it quiet enough for Courtney to miss it.
"Excuse me?" Elizabeth nearly fell off the couch in her shock. "All that and you didn't sleep with him?"
"He wouldn't let me." Robin complained, wrapping her arms around her waist. "And you are not to breathe a word of this to Lucky. I mean it Elizabeth."
"Like he'd believe any of this. But my lips are sealed."
"He said that I wasn't ready and then we went to the beach." Robin hoped her friend would leave it at that. She wondered if she should admit to the numerous almost attempts she and Patrick had made over the last couple of days. God and his sense of humor again. Robin bit the inside of her cheek. "Two more failed attempts."
Elizabeth whistled. "I feel that frustration."
"I invited him over two nights ago wearing that nightgown we picked up for the date that I never wore." Robin explained. "You were right about that thing. His jaw was dragging the ground."
"Told you so."
"You've been waiting to say that haven't you?"
"Since the nanosecond I realized you were going to say it to me."
"How much of this to do you really want to know?" Robin scrunched up her face.
"Enough to get the picture but not enough to make me want to blush when I inevitably run into Patrick at some Spencer family get together." Elizabeth suggested helpfully.
"We probably would have slept together the other night, but we finished a bottle of wine and passed out in my bed." Thank God they had made it there. She didn't know how she would have faced Courtney otherwise.
"What do you mean passed out in your bed?" Courtney asked from the kitchen.
"Patrick told me you came to drop off Morgan." Robin explained.
"He was lying." Courtney assured her.
"Courtney, isn't it time for you to get going?"
"Hey don't hate me because I'm right." Courtney waved her hand in Robin's direction.
"But you're not." Robin argued. "Patrick said--"
"Patrick lied."
Elizabeth could sense this was going to get real ugly real quick if she didn't step in. "Courtney, if you didn't drop Morgan off then where were you?"
"My flight was delayed and I didn't get in until after Robin left for work."
"Then how did he get here?" Robin challenged, folding her arms.
"Who did you have watching him?" Elizabeth asked.
"Laura." Robin said.
"Does she have a key?"
"No. Only Bobby has one." Robin's mouth dropped open. "Oh my God. Oh, my God!"
"What? What?" Obviously Robin had realized something but Elizabeth would be damned if she knew what it was.
"Patrick knew Morgan was home before I did." Robin replied shaking her head. "Which means one of two things: either Morgan walked in on us or Laura did."
"Oh. My. God." Elizabeth moved quickly to hug her friend. "I don't know which situation would scare me more."
"Oh my God." Robin moaned into Elizabeth's shoulder. "I'll never be able to face her again."
"Guess he's not so reputable now is he?" Courtney badgered further.
"Shut the hell up!" Robin ground through her teeth.
"Guys...calm down. Not the time for this crisis. What we need to do is plan damage control here." Elizabeth tried to sound cool and in control.
"Good luck with that. I already warned you." Courtney turned on her heel and hurried to the door, throwing it open and ignoring it as it crashed into the wall. She was in the elevator before Robin even knew what was going on.
"Who woke up on the bitch side of the bed this morning?" Elizabeth wondered.
"She's been like that since I came home from Santa Monica. She accused me of abandoning Morgan in favor of Patrick." Robin clarified, working her way through threatening tears.
"Ouch. She never struck me as insane."
"Is she really unfounded? I've made so many mistakes with Morgan already."
"Stop it. Stop right now." Elizabeth pulled back. "Did you suffer a brain injury I am not aware of?"
"What must Laura think of me?" Robin sniffled.
"Well from what I gather she thinks both Lucky and Patrick hung the moon and she seems to like you as well, I'm going to guess she's pretty darn happy and planning how to ambush you somewhere in town as well."
"Why did Patrick lie? I asked him point-blank."
"I know I'm going to regret asking this, but what exactly did Laura walk in on? Was Patrick fully dressed for example?"
"I don't think he was, but I was still in my nightgown. Oh God."
"So basically his aunt walked in on what looked the aftermath of a Sex and the City romp from Samantha and you wonder why he didn't tell you the truth?"
"I deserved to know, Elizabeth."
"Yes you did. And for that we will punish him horribly. But you have to understand why he lied."
"And he let me go over there and apologize when he knew damn well I had more than enough reason to be mad at him!"
"He's a guy. Of course he let you apologize. We'll have to make the punishment extra evil just for that."
"I never thought I'd say this, but I'm really glad I didn't make the mistake of sleeping with him. I'm still in control here."
"Exactly. I'm beginning to suspect control is everything with these Spencer boys."
"He's going to pay for humiliating me."