Chapter 4-

… "Good evening ladies and gentlemen," Remus began somewhat hesitantly, "May I begin by offering my warm congratulations to the bride and groom?"

There was a decisive, "Hear hear!" from the wedding guests, as James grinned proudly at his new wife.

"I first met James on the train to Hogwarts in our first year," Remus began, "Which, coincidentally

is the very same place where I met his lovely wife! Though for me, some of their best, and let's face it, most entertaining, moments came at a much later time in our school career. This is the story of how James Potter broke his nose – for the fifth time. Now this story is not mine first hand, however, I have had a first-hand experience of it on one of my stranger journeys into a penseive… that one, however, is another story…"

…

"You?"

"Yes, hello!"

"Why are you here?"

"Well, it said on my letter, which I received only a few weeks ago, that on the day of the first of

September I was to report to the Head's Carriage pendant notre voyage to be briefed on my new duties as Head Boy-"

"-I was expecting Remus, that's all," Lily replied to James, giving him a scornful look, as though he were a puppy who had done something foul on a brand new shag pile carpet.

"Well Dumbledore was expecting me, you see," James replied eloquently, "And unfortunately, Head Girl or not Lillykins, Dumbledore is still, as they say, top dog."

"Why is it that everything you say is so laced with irony?"

"Because without irony the world would be far too happy a place, my sweet flower," James grinned, plonking himself down in one of the armchairs beside him, "Ooh, they make the chairs much comfier here!" he exclaimed, the façade of an intellectual young man slipping.

"Please don't call me that," Lily sighed, apparently noticing his change in character, "I knew you couldn't keep that mature appearance up for too long."

"I can!" James protested, proving his immaturity, and apparently recognising it, "I mean… Of course I can remain mature for prolonged periods of time, my dear one…" he serious face slipped again into a broad grin, "You can't deny that you're happy to see me."

"There's a difference between being happy to see someone and happy to spend time with them," Lily quipped.

"Aah, I see," James looked mockingly quizzical, "So you're happy to see my gorgeous face, but disappointed that my otherwise beautiful mouth produces such horrifying noises?"

"For such an idiot, you caught onto that one fast," Lily said, blushing quickly, "Not that I think you're attractive or anything. I despise you."

"Course you do," James winked at her before turning to look out of the window as the outskirts of London rushed past them in a blaze of grey and black.

"What was that?" Lily snorted.

"What?" James raised an eyebrow at her.

"Your little wink, just then!"

"I think you're seeing things, Evans," James said, standing up to face Lily square on, so that he could see into the deep emerald green of her eyes, "I think that secretly you're so in love with me that you make up these little things, just to cling onto the hope that one day, we might be together," he moved closer, until they could feel each other's breath on their faces, Lily's was fast, whether out of anger or passion James couldn't tell, their faces were close to touching, "Ah well," James pulled away at the last moment before their lips met, "I'm afraid you might have to come to terms with the fact that that will never happen- better go patrol the corridors, " he said, heading for the door, "Sirius told me he'd bought an industrial strength dungbomb which he planned to give to a first year!"

James slid open the door of their carriage, and was gone in a flash.

"What just happened?" Lily whispered to herself, slumping in a chair.

"I think that young man just tried to kiss you, my dear," replied a refined voice from behind her, making Lily jump. She turned around to see a portrait of a plump old lady in a hat adorned with feathers, sitting chuckling to herself behind where she was sitting, "Good looking one too, my dear, wouldn't let him get away too easily!"

… "Now I know many of you think this may not be the most obvious story for me to tell, since I was not actually present for the event, however, it was the events after the… event… which I felt make the story…"

"Alright, Moony?" James slid open the door to the carriage and plonked himself down in the seat beside Sirius.

"Yeah not too bad thanks, James," Remus replied, before turning to look out of the window once more.

"No hi for me then?" Sirius simpered, pulling his best puppy-dog face.

"No," James grinned mischievously at him, "Now that I'm Head Boy, I have little time for peasants such as you."

Sirius gave James a very rude hand gesture, before piping up again, "So, I can tell you're just dying to tell us, Prongs – how was the lovely Lily?"

"Lovely as always?" Peter added with a giggle.

"Oh shut up you two," James ruffled his hair in a fashion he was much adept at doing, "For your information, we were just in the Heads' compartment, and she was all over me."

"Really?" Remus asked teasingly, "What exactly was she saying?"

"Oh James," Sirius squealed in his best girl's voice, "I know I've been pretending I hate your guts for the last seven years, but it's really because I'm so in love with you I can't bare it! I must have you now-"

"Oh bugger off Padfoot," James elbowed him light-heartedly, "Actually, she kissed me."

"WHAT!" screamed Remus, Peter and Sirius in unison, standing up in their seats just as the train stirred, causing them to fall clumsily back into their seats.

"Yup," James smiled crookedly, "We were just talking, and she came over and started making out with me… I knew it wouldn't be long before she could resist my charm!"

"If that's true then I'm Merlin's left testicle," Peter exclaimed, standing up once more and instantly being shoved back down.

"Well then, Wormy," said James, "You should currently be residing within Merlin's saggy y-fronts."

The boys laughed loudly as there was a knock on the carriage door, "Umm James," said the red-haired girl standing in the corridor as she slid open the sliding door, "I need to talk to you about some of the Head's duties we need to perform on the journey to Hogwarts."

"Head's Duties," Sirius winked at James, "Interesting…. James I think you should accompany the fair lady…."

James stood up and joined Lily in the corridor of the train, letting the door slam shut behind him. The green English country side seemed to glide by behind their two faces which were lit up in heated conversation. The boys watched them through the glass window of the compartment door.

"What do you think they're talking about?" Peter asked.

"Probably about how lovely the weather is, Wormy," Remus said sarcastically, raising an eyebrow at his dim-witted friend.

"No, I can tell exactly what they're saying," Sirius said confidently, "Oh James, that kiss we just shared was so fabulous I can't stay away from you! Oh Lily, I love you so much…" he put on a deep drawl to imitate his friend's voice, "Blah blah blah… Ah speak of the devil… I mean, devils," James and Lily had both stepped into the compartment once more.

"Surprised you managed to keep your tongue out of his mouth this time Lils," Remus said, chuckling to himself.

"What are you talking about?" Lily asked confusedly.

"Aha, well, your dear friend James here just told us that you two were, as they say, le faire comme les Français," Sirius laughed, James blushed fiercely, as he adjusted his glasses and slumped into his chair.

"What do you mean?" Lily asked once more, shooting daggers at James.

"You and James just made out in the Head's compartment!" Peter squealed with glee, and nearly fell from his seat once more.

Suddenly, there was a loud crunch of breaking bones, followed by a yelp of pain, and a slamming of the compartment door. It had all happened so quickly it was hard to tell what was going on until they boys looked at James' face. He was holding both hands to his nose and his shirt was covered in blood.

"Take your hand away from your face," Remus said quickly, and James did so to reveal an extremely crooked and blood splattered nose.

"Your good looks have been ruined, Prongs," Sirius grinned.

"Look here," Remus said, pulling out his wand, "Episkey!"

There was another sound of crunching bones, as James' nose regained its usual form. He began to siphon the blood from his shirt, a severely disgruntled look on his face.

… "So that's how James got his fifth broken nose. No matter how hard he may try to pretend, that fifth one was not in fact a Quidditch injury. I guess we know who'll be the perpetrator of any domestic abuse in this marriage," there was a loud laugh from the wedding guests as Remus finished his story, "I'm joking of course! To the happy couple! Now I believe it is the turn of a very dear friend of the bride's, Mrs Alice Longbottom, née Prince-"

"No need to always be so formal, Remus," said a small woman with short, dirty blonde hair, as she stood up to begin her wedding toast, "Now, I put a lot of thought into my speech…."

Hello guys! Sorry its been so long since my last update, but I hope you enjoy this one!

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