THIS IS RATED M FOR A LITTLE BITTY BIT OF SMUT NEAR THE END. DON'T LIKE TWO CONSENTING ADULTS DOIN' THE NASTY, DON'T READ!!

Lock up the liquor and keep your kids indoors

"She don't mean nothing, she's just having fun
tomorrow she'll say oh what have I done?
Her friend's will joke about all the stuff she lost
ya tequila makes her clothes fall off."
-Tequila Makes her Clothes Fall Off, Joe Nichols

"I want to get a cat." Sam announced.

It was close to nine at night and they had taken the last two available seats on the subway into mid-town. Its crowded and boisterous, filled with Friday night revellers on their way for a good time and shift workers tired and weary from a long shift, anxious to get home to a cold beer and some relaxation. Flack was using the browser on his cell to pass the time, while Sam, her arms wrapped around his bicep, peered to see what he was looking at. She smelled amazing. The J-Lo Live perfume she kept in the bathroom and knew drove him crazy. Just a little spritz in her hair and he was a goner. It didn't hurt that she looked devastatingly sexy in a sleek dark denim skirt that just grazed the top of her knees and hugged her ass and her hips, and a shimmery bronze halter top with a dangerously low back. And those Manolo Blanik shoes she'd wanted so badly and nearly fainted when he stopped off on their way home from the zoo and bought them for her. When she'd recovered enough to ask him how he paid for them, he'd just shrugged and said that's what credit is for.

"A what?" he asked, looking down at her.

"A cat. You know, four legs, whiskers, a tail."

"Please tell me you're kidding."

"What? You're not a cat guy? You're more the pit bull and rottweiler type?"

"It's not that. It's not that I have anything against cats. I'm not going to go and purposely run down one if I see it crossing the street. I ain't gonna gun it down like you do to innocent squirrels."

"It happened once!" she laughed. "Let it go! It's not like I meant it."

"Sure... my girlfriend, the psychopathic small animal killer wants a cat she can do unspeakable things to."

"I'll do unspeakable things to you in your sleep if you don't knock it off!" she laughed and looked up at him, her golden eyes sparkling.

He leaned over and kissed her. Long and soft. "Now back to this cat thing." he said. "You get a cat and I can't even come within five feet of you. Allergies. Massive allergies. We're talking sneezing and breaking out in hives."

"Well I don't want that. What about one of them hypo-allergenic cats with no hair?"

"Are you nuts? Those things are just plain ugly. Get a bird or a rabbit or a guinea pig or something like that.'

"My gun might accidentally go off and kill the last two."

He laughed. "Hey, you said it. Every store that sells small animals needs to get an order of protection against you."

She giggled and kissed his cheek. He smelled so good and looked so damn good in a pair of well fitting jeans and a white button down shirt. "You're so mean to me." she pouted playfully.

"And tell me how you of all people would have time for a pet when you barely have time for me?"

"A pet I can boss around and it doesn't give me lip." she reasoned. "Not to mention it's cute and cuddly. Not that you're not cute and cuddly when you want to be..."

"So get a dog. Some small yappy thing just like you."

She frowned and pinched the inside of his thigh hard enough to leave a mark.

"Oww...okay, okay...I meant meant to say some pretty, sweet submissive little thing like you."

"Yeah... I bet. Submissive. You wish."

"What? There isn't anything submissive about letting someone handcuff you to the bed?"

"I was not being submissive. " she argued. "I was enjoying it."

He shook his head. "You are one sick, twisted little girl."

"Me!?" she exclaimed. "It was your idea! What does that say about you?"

"Says I have a kinky girl who likes me to kinky things to her."

She pinched him even harder the second time.

"Shit! All right, all right! Just joking! Take it easy! Come here..." he put his arm around her slender shoulders and pulled her tightly against him. Kissed her temple, then her ear. "I'm just teasing, you know that. You know I love you. Didn't I show you that for the last two hours?"

She smiled and giggled softly when he kissed her neck. "I have to admit," she said. "Those multiple orgasms nearly put me in a coma."

"And you're complaining?"

"No. Not at all." she declared and turned her face into his and kissed him long and soft.

"Maybe we should just get off at the next stop and go home." Flack suggested.

"And leave Carmen without her best drinking buddy? She would not be impressed."

"You're not planning on getting too drunk are you?"

"What do you consider too drunk?" she asked.

"You paying homage to the porcelain God all night."

She laid her hand over her chest. "I promise you on my life that I will attempt to keep my stomach contents to myself."

He sighed. "You always been a drinker or something? Where does a little thing like you store it all?"

She narrowed her eyes. "Are you trying to suggest something?"

"What? No. I'm just saying that..."

"I do not have a drinking problem." she informed him.

"I never said you did." Flack defended himself. "I just asked if you've always drank a lot and where you put it."

"So you're saying I drink a lot." she concluded.

"No. What I'm saying if you'd listen to me, is that when you do drink you drink a lot for such a tiny thing. You tend to go a bit overboard. Like you don't know when to stop. Booze can only numb the time for a little while. Next day the pain is back along with a nasty hangover."

"Jesus Christ, Don," she huffed and moved as close to the window as possible, arms crossed over her chest. "Quit trying to psycho-analyse me all the time."

"I'm not. I'm just saying that it doesn't help anything. It's only temporary. You need to stop reading into everything I say. I wasn't suggesting or accusing. I was just commenting."

"Well do me a favor and keep your comments to yourself."

"Why do you do that?" he asked. "Get all bitchy and moody when someone tells the truth and it bothers you to hear it."

"I don't." she argued.

"You do. Wouldn't bother you if you didn't have a guilty conscience about it."

"I don't have a guilty conscience about anything. I don't have a drinking problem. When I go out I like to drink and when I drink I do it until I don't feel anything or remember anything. Why is that such a problem for you? You drink. Far more often than I do. You're always going out after work with Danny."

"The difference is that I can find my way home afterwards and remember by name." Flack told her. "You drink more in one night then I do in a week. That's dangerous. You can't tell me you think that that's okay.'

She just sighed.

"And on top of that, you're not even suppose to be drinking with the meds you're on. You trying to kill yourself?"

"Not lately." she mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing. And you're right. You're always right. It's not okay. But I do it because I cope better with things and it's nice to be someone else for a while. A different me."

"But what about the people who love you the way you are?" he asked gently.

"I don't know how anyone could like me I'm so fucked up." she complained.

"I do."

"I meant normal people."

"I love you." he said. "And I don't like seeing you hurt yourself. And you seem to do that a lot. Revisit all the bad things, torture yourself instead of living in the present and letting yourself be happy."

A smile spread slowly across her face and she turned those golden eyes on him. "When did you get so deep?" she asked.

"I have my moments." he replied, and put his hand on the back of her neck and pulled her back towards him, kissing the side of her head. "Just promise me you'll be smart about what you're doing. I don't want to see you get hurt."

She sighed and relaxed against him. "Why do you always have to be right?" she asked.

"It's not that I'm always right. I just make more sense. More education, less common sense. So what does that say for someone with a masters degree? Means you function like a ten year old."

She elbowed him in the gut. "What do you care? Not like you're with me for my brains."

"I happen to find your brains very sexy. And very intimidating. Scary when a woman is that much smarter than you."

"And in your case, that does not take much." she teased.

"Easy... easy... quit trying to be a comedienne. Just promise you'll take it easy tonight. Don't go overboard. I'm just asking for a little co-operation."

"But if I get really drunk, it'll be easier for you to take advantage of me." she said.

"It's not easy enough when you're sober?'

"Now whose being a comedian?" she laughed. "So you gonna buy me a cat or what?"

"You trying to get rid of me?" he asked.

She smiled. "Not in a million years."

They met Carmen and Speed outside of Tailgate's. A sports bar/night club in mid-town that was popular with the college crowd and some of the cops. Carmen paced up and down the sidewalk, irritated that her friends were over ten minutes late. She hated it when people were late. Speed teased her that she was as anal about lateness as he was about people messing with his trace lab. He sat on a nearby bench watching her grow more and more agitated with each passing second. Mostly though, he was thinking how hot she looked in a ruby red corset style top and black skirt that reached her knees and had slits up the sides, and killer black heels. her auburn hair flowing loosely down her back.

When Samantha and Flack did arrive hand in hand, Carmen first gave them a royal bitching out and then the two girls hugged each other and squealed in greeting.

"Can you explain to me why they do that every time they meet up when they see each other all day nearly every day?" Speed asked.

"Your guess is as good as mine." Flack said.

Carmen was eyeing Sam from head to toe approvingly. "Check out those shoes!" she exclaimed. "Are those the Manolo's?"

"They are!" Sam cried. "He bought them for me today. You like?"

"Love them." Carmen declared. "How'd you manage to swing that?"

"I've been a good girl." Sam reasoned. And check this out..." she held out her left hand.

"Oh my God!" Carmen grabbed her friend's hand. "It's gorgeous! You must have been a very, very, very good girl. Congratulations. You and Don will be so happy together."

"What? It's not an engagment ring, Carmen. It's too soon for that. It's a commitment ring. A just because ring."

"Well whatever you want to call it, it's fucking amazing. Look at that thing sparkle. Show Speed."

"Show me what?" he asked as he and Flack joined them.

Sam held out her hand.

"Very nice." Speed said. "Way to go Flack. Make the rest of us poor bastards look bad."

"And the shoes!" Carmen exclaimed.

"You're pathetic, Flack." Speed declared. "You just have to give her whatevr she wants, don't you."

"He always does." Sam said with a grin and grabbed Flack's hand and dragged him towards the bar.

Adam had long ago arrived with Hawkes and was discussing his lack of love life while the two shared a pitcher. Stella nursed a white wine as she listened to them, a smirk of amusement on her face. She didn't go out often with the team, but with Mac stuck working late yet again, she'd accepted the offer of a night out. Danny was alone, sipping Crown and Coke and spending most of his time text messaging Erica who was stuck on nights.

It wasn't long until the guys had made their way to the back of the bar and staked claim on two pool tables and were knocking back pitchers of beer and shots of JD and the three women were huddled at a table, engaging in a little girl talk and Carmen and Stella continuously inspecting Sam's ring.

"Looks like an engagement ring to me." Danny commented for the fifth time in as many minutes.

"Well it's not." Flack told him yet again.

"Musta cost you a mint." Danny said.

"You'll punch me out if I tell you how much."

"Try me."

"Almost a grand."

"That does warrant a punching out." Speed declared. "A grand on a ring and six hundred on shoes? How can a homicide detective afford all that?"

Flack shrugged and sipped his beer. "I came into some money."

Danny frowned.

"Legally, Messer. Don't be an ass. You guys hear the latest about Zack? Serving Sam with papers?"

"I was there." Speed sighed. "Nearly knocked out the process server."

"Not right." Danny shook his head. "That sonofabitch plans to abduct her and to who knows what to her and he takes her to court? Tell ya, Flack, we should have killed him and hid the body."

"Like that wouldn't have come back to bite ya in the ass." Speed said. "Gotta trust the system."

"The system?" Danny snorted. "How do you do that when you're constantly seeing criminals go free?"

"You start getting disillusioned in the job and might as well quit." Speed said.

"Would you like it if this was happening to Carmen?" Danny asked.

"Why would you ask me that? Of course I'm going to say no. I didn't say it was fair."

"The guy is a fucking wack job and Brooklyn doesn't deserve that." Danny declared.

"I didn't say she deserved it." Speed told him. "The system is in place for a reason. It upholds the structure of modern society. Without it, we'd have no order or justice and the crime rate would be unspeakable."

Flack frowned. "Do me a favour and shut the fuck up. This is personal. Not work."

"If I wasn't being subjective, I wouldn't believe in the system and I wouldn't get up and go to work every morning." Speed said. "I do think that Sam has nothing to worry about. Any good lawyer will get that thrown out and we all know it."

"Wanna hear the latest?" Flack asked. "How good the system is? Mac heard from Phoenix PD. Zack is pleading temporary insanity. And you both better keep your mouths shut 'cause Sam knows nothing about it."

"Every system is flawed." Speed reasoned. "And why the hell haven't you told her yet?"

"Mac asked me not to."

"No one else knows?" Danny asked.

Flack shook his head. "Just me, Mac and now you two. He wants to tell her himself on Monday."

"Better have something nice planned for afterwards to take her mind off of it." Speed said.

"Yeah." Flack agreed. "Like a whole bottle of tranqs just for her."

"Go with some tequila and a box of oreos." Speed suggested.

"I'm trying not to contribute to her love affair with alcohol." Flack said.

"That leaves you with the oreos and good old fashioned sex." Danny told him.

"Comfort sex is often the best kind there is." Flack said.

"The sad part is how true that is." Speed sighed.

"I was thinking." Flack said seriously. "About retiring early, say around fifty, and moving somewhere nice and quiet."

"It's scary." Danny declared. "You thinking long term. Sam's changed you. In a good way, mind you. You gotta future there, Flack."

"I didn't say with her." he joked. "How nice and quiet would that be?'

"You'd be bored if it was all sunshine and roses." Speed told him.

"You guys wanna hear scary?" Flack asked. "Today, I actually thought about kids."

Danny nearly spit out his beer. "Kids with Brooklyn? Now? Is she already knocked up or something?"

"She shouldn't be drinking if she is." Speed said.

"She's not knocked up." Flack assured them. "And I don't mean kids right now. I mean in the near future."

"How near?" inquired Danny. "A year? Five years? What?"

"I mean maybe next year or so." Flack said. "Sooner even. I don't know. And she's made it perfectly clear that she does not want kids if she's not married."

"I knew you'd fallen for her," Speed said shaking his head. "But wow."

"You telling me in a year I could be Uncle Danny? Holy crap. That is an engagement ring, isn't it."

"No." Flack sighed in frustration. "I am just saying she won't have kids out of wedlock and I'm not getting any younger. Am I making any sense?'

"A scary amount of sense." Speed assured him.

"This is all completely beyond anything I have ever been through." Flack declared ad finished off his beer.

"And you're freaking out, right?" Danny asked.

"I am beyond freaking out."

"Just take it one step at a time and you'll be fine." Speed assured him.

"You ever not wanted to go slow and you feel like your going nuts?" Flack asked.

"All the time." Speed replied. "That kind of thing unnerves me. I don't like losing control like that."

"You think that's scary?" Flack asked. "My ex called me while Sam was in the shower tonight."

"What the hell did she want?" Danny said bitterly.

"She says she misses me."

Danny laughed. "She misses not being fucked by a blue collar guy. Tell her if she wants to play police man that bad, you'll lock her pampered ass up for the night and she can get a taste of that first hand."

"Tried telling her I had a girlfriend, but I don't think she believed me." Flack poured himself another beer. "She said that she knows I miss her and what she can do for me."

Danny snorted. "She is unreal. You told me being with her was like fucking a corpse."

"It was. Seriously horrible. She just lay there and let me do all the work."

"No wonder you and Sam can't get enough if it was that bad." Speed said. "From that to all this hot, crazy sex?"

"I do not kiss and tell." Flack said.

"You just let the scratches and bite marks do the telling." Speed concluded.

"You should call Devon and tell her to come down here and let her and Sam scrap it out." Danny suggested. "Sell tickets. All the money you'd make you could retire now.'

"Something tells me I'd make more money off of a video of Sam and Carmen molesting each other like they are right now on the dance floor." Flack said.

They all turned to look. Sure enough, Carmen and Sam were bumping and grinding to Justin Timberlake's SexyBack. It was better than what Sam had been doing earlier, up on a table dancing to The Dope Show by Marilyn Manson while Danny slipped money into the waist band of her skirt. After wards, he'd declared she'd make a good stripper or a suicide girl. To which Sam had replied that a female room mate she'd 'fooled around' with had become a suicide girl. Before the guys could pick their jaws off the floor, Carmen was announcing she and Al had done the same thing and that Al had mentioned the innocent little girl from college she'd corrupted. Flack couldn't get over the fact that Sam, who insisted that she and this Al had done everything but oral, had actually done anything with a girl. Speed, upon hearing the admission from both Sam and Carmen, had announced this news was like all his Christmases rolled into one. And a mention of Al's tongue ring had convince Sam to go after they left the bar to get hers done. To which Danny had slapped him on the back and said "You lucky bastard."

And now, there they were on the dance floor. Two girls who swore up and down they only loved men and were just experimenting, enjoying themselves a little too much. And their eyes only widened more when at the end of the song, Carmen grabbed Sam and kissed her full on the lips and Sam didn't even resist.

"I don't know whether to be jealous or turned on." Flack said.

"I'm going with turned on." Speed said, turning off his cell phone after capturing the whole event on camera. "Jealousy is majorly over rated."

Sam and Carmen headed back, arms linked, secretly relishing the fact that thier little show they'd put on had gotten the guys so riled up. It was apparent by the stunned, yet awed looks on their faces.

"You're girl's a good kisser, Flack." Carmen informed him. "No wonder you have no complaints. I'm going to the bathroom. Sam, you coming with? You can show me what else you can do."

The guys watched as hand in hand, the two drunk women sauntered towards the bathroom.

"What I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall in that bathroom." Speed said.

"You guys think they'll actually do anything?" Danny asked. "You guys should go in there and see what's what."

"Wouldn't hurt to see if they're not passed out or anything." Speed told Flack. "Who knows what they're doing in there."

What they were doing was sitting on the sink ledge finishing off bottles of Mike's Hard Lemonade and laughing hysterically over how worked up the guys had gotten over a plan the two girls had hatched over a week ago. They were still laughing and talking when both Speed and Flack walked into the wash room and busted the two of them.

"Get out!" Sam yelled. "This is the ladies!"

"And here I was thinking we'd get to see some girl on girl action." Flack said.

Sam laughed. "You are so gullible."

"I can't believe you two seriously thought we were coming in here to have sex!" Carmen exclaimed.

"Kick Carmen and Tim out and lock the door and maybe me and you can have sex in here." Sam told Flack.

"That's our cue to leave." Speed said and dragged Carmen out of there.

"You can't be serious." Flack said, watching as his girlfriend untucked his shirt. "In a bathroom?'

"You got what you wanted in the car the other night." Sam told him. "Now it's time for me to get what I want. Right here, right now."

"Sam, it's a public bathroom. Germs. Lots of germs."

"You'll only be touching me." she reminded him. "And besides, after the little thing with Carmen, I'm kinda turned on right now. All wet and everything."

"You have had way too much to drink." Flack said, prying her hands off his pants. "Let's just go home and..."

"We can home, you run the risk of me being too tired to do anything." she told him. "You don't want to take that risk do you?" she yanked her hands out of his grasp and began undoing his belt.

He decided he didn't. He went and locked the door. "You better not be thinking of Carmen when I do this." he said.

"I promise I won't say her name out loud." Sam teased.

He grabbed her and kissed her. Hard. Demanding. His hands sliding up her skirt to yank down the lace panties she wore. Pulling them all the way to her ankles and tossing them on the ledge of the sink before grabbing her by the ass and lifting her up onto the counter.

"Wait." she said and slipped back down onto her feet. Then finsihed with his belt, the button and the zipper on hsi pants before sinking to her knees and giving him head.

"You are one dirty little girl." he said, his hands buried in her hair.

She just smiled and continued with what she was doing.

He couldn't take it for longer than a few minutes. Then he was pushing her away and telling her to lean over the sink. "You sure about this?" he asked. It wouldn't be the first time he'd done anything like that. But he wasn't going to be telling her that.

She nodded, shuttering at the sensation of his hands squeezing and carressing her ass, opening her legs farther.

He teased her at first. Rubbing the head of his cock against her moist opening until she was begging him to fuck her all ready. he grabbed her by the hips and thrust into her, watching her face in the mirror in front of them. Seeing the pleasure that came over her face as she watched him as well, both of them smiling.

Someone pounded at the door. A voice telling whoever was inside to open the fuck up before they called the manager.

"You better hurry up!" Sam managed through gritted teeth.

He thrust into her harder and faster. She was trying to not make any noise as she got closer to orgasm and was failing miserably at it. He reached around her to clamp his hand over her mouth to prevent her from screaming. Only to have her bite down hard.

"Fuck!" he nearly screamed himself, both from the pain in his hand and because when she orgasmed, her inner walls tightened around him and sent him over the edge almost immediately.

They took a few minutes to catch their breath and clean themselves up. When they finally emerged from the bathroom, a tiny Asian girl in a skin tight dress was waiting to get in. A huge smile spread across her face at the sight of the slightly dishevelled and flushed couple.

"I'm with the NYPD." Flack said. "Routine drug bust."

The girl eyed him from head to toe. "You wanna bust me too, officer?" she asked.

"No. I busted who I wanted."

"I bet you're good at your job." she said.

Sam offered up a huge grin of her own. "He's very, very good at it." she declared.

Two hours later, barely able to talk with the newly acquired piercing in her tongue that she couldn't stop admiring, Samantha and Flack listened as the piercing artist listed all the precautions she had to take in order to prevent infection. On the top of the list was rinsing with a mixture of peroxide and water, and refraining from smoking, alcohol and oral sex. The latter for at least three weeks.

Flack couldn't believe his ears. "Are you telling me that the sole reason I just shelled out eighty bucks can't happen for almost a month?"

"Live and learn." the heavily tattooed and pierced barely out of college guy told him.

"Just think." Sam said almost incoherently, her tongue swollen, sounding like she had a mouthful of cotton. "You've got something to look forward to."

Thanks to everyone reading and reviewing!! Hope your all enjoying this! I am having e-mail issues and hopefully will be able to go back to returning them on Saturday. My apologies for not returning messages. I really do appreciate them!!

I am plugging Aphina's Devine Intervention and Madison Bellows' Brooklyn Bridges and their joint collaboration, What Ifs. Check them all out. You will not be disappointed!