Disclaimer: Me no own, you no sue.
HAPPY CANADA DAY TO ALL YOU CANUCKS READING THIS!
This is dedicated to all of you who love long chaps.
When it rains, it pours
"She's the sunset's shadow,
she's like Rembrandt's light
She's the history that's made at night
She's my lost companion,
she's my dreamin' tree
Together in this brief eternity
Summer days, winter snow
She's all things to behold
She's my kind of rain
Like love from a drunken sky
Confetti falling down all night
She's my kind of rain."
-She's My Kind of Rain, Tim McGraw
A/N: I just want to thank each and every one of you that have supported me and this story and helped me reach the 500+ reviews mark. I never dreamed that this story would be as popular as it is and touch so many people. Updates may slow down a bit. My son is out of day care for the summer and he's my main priority. But I promise I will work deligently at this story and try for once or twice a week updates. Hope everyone understands and keep reading!
Much love to all of you
BEG 75
"Therapy?" Carmen asked, helping herself to a bottle of water from an artfully arranged table of canned and bottled drinks and trays of fresh fruit and veggie and dip located at the front of the crowded conference room.
"It's what he said." Sam replied, flipping through the information package handed to her the moment they walked in the door.
There were two and a half dozen couples gathered in the room for the sign up and introductory to the pre-natal classes, and Sam was somewhat flustered at the thought of being the only one there without a husband or boyfriend.
Flack had called a half an hour before he was suppose to pick her up with the news that he was stuck at a last minute crime scene with Max in Far Rockaway and didn't see himself getting away from work anytime in the near future. She could tell by the reluctant, wary tone in his voice that he was expecting a freak out on her part, but she'd surprised him, and herself, by accepting the news graciously and telling him to be safe at work and that if he was that late to wake her up when he got home if she was sleeping so she'd know he'd made it in okay. And then finished the call with a sincere I love you.
She figured if he was trying to turn over a new leaf, she may as well, too. And part of that was accepting how stressful his job was and how important of a service he preformed and that sometimes, unfortunately, she had to take a back seat to his career. He'd been understanding and caring and patient that afternoon while she talked about her past, and the least she could do was return some of that.
She still couldn't help but be a little pissed. She had been looking forward to having some couple time. They didn't seem to get enough alone time that was outside of the bedroom. They tried going on dates like a normal couple. The movies and dinner and walks through Central Park and even a couple Mets games complete with concession stand food and Cracker Jacks. But dates always seemed to be interrupted by his cell phone going off. Hell, even bedroom time had a knack of being interrupted mid session. She always thought that because she was in the same field, it would be easier accepting the role as a cop's wife if she ever decided to settle down with one. Turns out, she still worried endlessly and prayed that that one horrific phone call would never come and was filled with enormous relief when he walked in the door safe and sound at the end of a shift.
But that's what happened when you loved someone. Love outweighed logic and reasoning sometimes. And she wouldn't change that out of control feeling for anything in the world. She just hoped it would always stay that way. That that kind of love wouldn't diminish over time.
"Why does the thought of Flack in therapy make me want to piss myself laughing?" Carmen asked, handing Sam a can of apple juice.
Flack had called her, their designated labour coach -how and why she'd ever agreed to being in the room during the delivery and guiding Sam through the experience she'd never know- and asked her if she wouldn't mind filling in for him at the sign up/information session. Carmen had just gotten home from her own long shift and had planned to take a steamy bath and the curl up on the couch with something to eat and a glass of wine or two. But with Speed working nights for the next couple of weeks, she found herself lonely and with no desire to be on her own, and being with her best friend and future niece or nephew was the next best thing.
"He is the last person you'd expect to be cooperative." Sam said. "But surprisingly enough, it was his own decision."
"Something tells me that your guys' little fight the other night may have played a small part too." Carmen told her, as they stepped in line to sign up.
"Maybe." Sam agreed. She had told Carmen bits and pieces of their argument and Speed had filled in the rest when Carmen arrived home from work. "And I think maybe the therapist said something today that may have got him thinking about some of the things I said."
"Well personally, I think it takes a big man to realize there's things he needs to change. And if he's willing to try therapy in hopes of it making things better between you guys, than he obviously loves you more than you give him credit for."
"Since when are you on his side?" Sam only half joked.
"I think sometimes you're a little quick to jump to conclusions and a little too harsh on him. He's been single for a long time and things happened pretty fast between you guys and it has to be overwhelming for him. He'd never admit to it, but I bet you the idea of getting married soon and having a kid is scaring the shit out of him."
"You're right. He'd never admit to that. And I can't believe you think I'm too harsh on him and that I over react about things." Sam said, sounding hurt.
"Sam, you know I love you and you're my girl. But that's the way I see it. You nee to cut the poor guy some slack over this Max thing. I wouldn't be too happy either if Tim worked with someone he had a past with, but you go a little overboard. You know he loves you and adores you and you should also know that he'd never do anything as stupid as cheating on you. He'd loose everything and he knows it. And he doesn't want that happening. Trust me."
"I can't believe you." Sam huffed.
"What? What did I say?"
"Siding with Max! Thanks Carmen. Makes me feel real great."
"What? I am not siding with Max. I barely know her. And when she tried talking shit about you to me and Hawkes today, Hawkes and I knocked her back a bit. I just think you need to relax a little bit with Flack. He's trying Sam. He really is. And you should trust him enough to know he'd never fuck you over."
"Well let's just hope that no one from Tim's past never shows up. I wonder how'd you'd be reacting to that? Bet it would be different then."
"There you go with the over reacting again." Carmen said.
"Oh whatever." Sam snapped. "Go be friends with her if you like her that much."
"Sam, come on. I never…."
"Good evening ladies." A bubbly blond greeted the two young women as they stepped up to the registration table. "Welcome to our orientation session. If you'll just sign your basic information on that clipboard there and include all the names of family members or friends who may at one point accompany you to classes. And if you'll make yourself some name tags, you can start making some new friends…"
"Don's going to shit if he finds out he needs to network with people." Sam said to Carmen as the latter grabbed a marker to make their name tags and Sam filled out the information on the clipboard. "He's not exactly Mr Sociable. Hope there's no group exercises. He would not be impressed."
Carmen finished with the name tags and slapped one roughly onto Sam's left shoulder.
"Oww!" Sam complained. "What the hell?"
"Snap out of it! Stop being such a whiny little bitch about this Max thing and get control of yourself."
"You know…." the blond behind the desk said. "I have to hand it to you two."
"What for?" Carmen asked.
"We don't get a lot of same sex couples coming in for our classes. New York City is very diverse and open minded, but we still don't see it often."
"What?" Carmen laughed. "Wait….you think me and her are….oh my God! You are so far off! I'm just her labour coach. The baby's dad couldn't make it so I'm here instead."
"There's no reason to hide it or be ashamed." the woman said. "I think it's wonderful to be in love."
"You have this so wrong." Sam argued. "We are not lesbians. We're friends. My husband couldn't make it and asked her to come in his place. That's all. We like men. We love men. I got pregnant by a man. The old fashioned way. And he's a hot, hot man at that. I am not a lesbian and neither is she. At least I don't think she is."
Carmen frowned. "Very funny."
"I'm sorry." the woman appeared sheepish. "I just assumed…."
"Well don't." Carmen said and she and Sam headed for some empty seats. "Can you believe that? I mean, no offence, Sam. You're hot and all that, but I'm just not into you in that way. Curious sometimes maybe…."
Sam's eyes widened. "I will try and pretend you never said that." she said, sinking into one of the chairs.
"But not curious enough to say hey, let's see if we like it. But if I was a lesbian, I would so corrupt you. You'd never want to go back to Flack ever again."
"I doubt that. He knows exactly what he's doing and does it very, very, very well. Mind you, it would so turn him on to hear you talk like that. You know, he told me today, right before we were about to do things, that me and you are his ultimate wet dream."
"I'm flattered. Tell him I said the three of us should…"
"I don't think so." Sam said.
"Relax." Carmen laughed. "I'm joking. I'd never poach your man just to see if his tongue is as talented as you say it is."
"That I do not exaggerate about." Sam declared. Then suddenly turned serious. "When you were with Matthew and hanging around all the Tanglewood guys, I'm sure you witnessed some run ins with Pelham Bay boys. Right?"
"A couple? Why?"
"Do you remember a Pelham guy named Evan Lucerno? He was a few years older than you and Matthew. Him and Sonny Sassone used to be after each others asses all the time for one stupid thing after another."
"Hmmm……rings a bell. Really tall? Well built? Kind of shaggy blond hair and hazel eyes?"
"That would be him."
"What about him?" Carmen asked.
"That was my first boyfriend. My gangster boyfriend." Sam rolled her eyes at the word gangster.
"Really? You had good taste even back then. Why are you bringing him up now?"
"My cousin Erica ran into him about two weeks ago. He's some big player on Wall Street now and has really transformed himself. And for some idiotic reason known only to her, she gave him my phone numbers. Work, cell, you name it."
"Uh-oh." Carmen said.
"Exactly. He's been trying to contact me since. He's left messages on my cell phone and at the lab."
"What does he want?"
"He says he wants to touch base. Catch up."
"After what? Sixteen plus years?"
"I know. Nothing but trouble can come from this. He knows that I'm having a baby and getting married. So I don't know why he's so insistent about meeting up with me. That part of my life is so far in the past."
"Did you tell Flack?"
"I told him about Evan and I a long time ago. I didn't tell him about Evan trying to contact me."
"Smart move. One busted hand is enough." Carmen said. "Seriously though, you should mention it to him. In case this guy shows up at the lab and they run into each other accidentally. That would not be pretty."
"No," Sam sighed and sipped her juice. "it would not. Why can't things ever go nice and smooth for us?"
"You and Flack are not meant to have things go easily and smooth. It's what makes your guys' connection so strong. That you have to work so hard all the time. Makes you guys realize how much you love each other and support each other. "
Sam grinned. "Boy, you are on a roll tonight with the relationship advice."
"I am in rare form." Carmen agreed. "But you should tell him. Before he finds out in some crazy freaky way. Like the guys shows up at the door with flowers and candy."
Sam shuddered at the thought of what reaction that would bring about. "That would so not be a good thing. Don would kill him."
"He was honest with you about Devon calling him all those times." Carmen pointed out.
"True. And we haven't heard from her since, thank God. She probably found some other blue coloured guy to torment."
"You'll tell him? About this Evan guy?"
Sam nodded. "I'll tell him." she said somewhat reluctantly.
"Good. Because you don't and you'll cause yourself a world of hurt, trust me. I picked something up for you today."
Sam's face brightened. "Presents? I love presents."
"Nothing major. Just a little something I saw passing by this store on my lunch break." Carmen dug around in her cramped, over flowing hand bag and came up with a small velvet box that she presented to her friend. "I thought of you when I saw it." she said.
Sam took the box and opened the lid carefully. Inside, dangling from a thin gold chair, was an oval shaped blue cameo pendant, inside of which was a silhouette of a mother holding a child. It brought tears to Sam's golden eyes.
"Carmen, it's beautiful. Thank you." she leaned sideways in her chair and hugged the other woman.
"I know how much this baby means to you, Sam. And with all the suspicions of problems, you love it no matter what. And I want you to know that if there is something wrong, you and Don can count on Tim and I to support you guys. And we'll the baby no matter what. I know it's been tough. Having that on your mind and not being able to do anything about it."
Sam nodded. "Thanks, Carmen. For being there for us. We do appreciate it."
Carmen smiled. "I know." she bent down and put her face close to Sam's stomach. "Do you hear me in there you spoiled rotten little shit? You're more like your mother than you realize. Your daddy spoils her, too. " she rubbed her friend's tummy and sat back up. "Getting bigger there, mommy." she teased Sam.
"Don't remind me." she sighed. "None of my normal clothes fit anymore."
"Hey, no bitching. You guys had fun, pay the price. I hope you realize how much he loves you and this baby."
"I do. But something tells me I need to tell him that more."
"Even guys need to know their appreciated some time. He may be all tough and macho, but I'm sure you'd make his day if you did tell him. Boost his ego a bit."
"Trust me, Don doesn't need an ego boost. There is nothing wrong with that man's ego. But you're right. I should tell him. I have a lot to make up for."
"Shit, we all do. We've all made mistakes in our relationships. It's just acknowledging it and fixing it before it's too late that really matters."
Sam nodded. And decided there was no better time to start repairing things than the present. She took out her cell phone and turned it on and sent Flack a sappy, short and sweet text message.
A small start was better than no start at all.
The rain hammered down. Noisily pelting the windshield of Flack's unmarked squad car, the wipers working frantically to keep the glass clear of water. So strong and so hard that it sounded as if hail was hitting the roof and the hood. Thunder rumbled and lightning slashed the pitch black sky. It looked like midnight but was only twenty to eight.
Flack sat behind the wheel with the engine running and head cranked and radio on. Waiting for Max while she grabbed them some coffees and something to eat at the deli across the street before they made the pilgrimage to Far Rockaway. Surveillance. Until seven thirty in the morning. Flack was not impressed. All day long they'd done nothing but sit on their asses with no calls and no new leads in old cases. And an hour before clock out, a tip came in that someone was harbouring a wanted a suspect. There were two plain clothes sitting by the house for the last three hours and nothing.
Max was taking a hell of a long time. He could barely see through the driving rain, he thought he could make out crowds of people in the deli. He'd brought along a book for such moments. And for when he got sick and tired of staring at some guy's house and decided to let Max play captain of the watch.
He was almost done the fifth chapter when the passenger door opened and Max, drenched from head to toe, sat the drink carry tray and bag of food on the dash before climbing in. He didn't look up but did lean forward to turn the heat up even more for her.
"You're doing coffee run next time." she informed him, running her hands through her hair and squeezing out excess water.
"Can't get cast wet." he responded.
"Lots of good you'll be if you can't get out and chase a perp."
"Don't worry about me, Max. I'll be out the door and down the block before you get one foot out the car."
She snorted. "You mean you actually know how to read?" she asked, nodding at the book.
"Yep. I happen to be one of the few literate cops. And unlike you, I prefer books without pictures. And I was going to bring the Karma Sutra to read, but I've gone through it about ten times and my wife says I'm a God when it comes to those things so I've since retired it."
"You wish, Flack." Max said, grabbing the bag and digging through it. She took out a neatly wrapped sandwich and a bag of chips and tossed them in his lap.
"You always seemed to enjoy it. You remember how amazing I am, don't you, Max? You certainly never complained. Begging is more like it."
Max felt herself blush furiously at his words, and at the memory of what had taken place between them. And that he wasn't exaggerating in the slightest.
Flack folded the corner down on the book and tossed it onto the dashboard. Using his left hand for everything was proving to be more awkward and uncomfortable as he imagine it would be. He had to reach across his body to take out the coffee cup from the tray. Never mind dressing or starting the ignition on the car or something that required the right hand or two good hands.
Max picked up the book and studied it. "The Expectant Father?" she smirked. "Why the hell are you reading this?"
"Hmm….maybe because I have a kid on the way in less than five months." Flack said, sipping the steaming coffee.
"Don't be so sarcastic." Max said, "You would think getting laid this afternoon would have put you in a better mood."
"Who says I got laid?"
"You were gone for two hours and when you came back you had that goofy grin on your face that men get when they just got lucky."
"Don't be so jealous, Max." Flack said, setting the cup in the holder by his seat.
"What's there to be jealous of? You're dysfunctional relationship?"
"Why don't you…." the sound of his cell phone beeping cut the words off. He took it from the pocket of the NYPD windbreaker he had on and checked the display. An incoming text message from Sam.
I JUST WANTED U TO KNOW THAT I APPRECIATE U BEING THERE FOR ME. IT MEANS A LOT THAT I CAN OPEN UP TO YOU. THANKS FOR BEING SO SUPPORTIVE. ME AND THE BABY MISS YOU AND LOVE YOU AND HOPE YOU STAY SAFE.
A huge smile spread across his face as he read it to himself.
"You make me sick." Max complained, knowing what that smile meant and who that message had come from. "You two are pathetic."
"Is it my fault you've never been in love, Max? Remind me to call her later after that pre-natal thing. So I can tell her how late I'm going to be."
"You have to check in every now and then? Please."
"So she doesn't worry." Flack corrected her, putting his phone back and then switching the car in drive, barely able to see the oncoming cars through the rivers of rain. "What is up your ass, Maxwell?" he asked as he pulled out into traffic.
"My ass? What is up your girl's ass? She all but attacked me at the precinct today when I was sitting at your desk."
"She's protective. And why were you at my desk? You've got your own."
"That's not the point. The thing is she seems unstable. I was just minding my own business and she started in on me about staying away from you and watching what I was doing and all this other crap. You need to reign her in, Flack. Keep better control of her before she gets hurt."
Flack couldn't help but laugh out loud. "Before she gets hurt? Max, pregnant or not, she could take you outside and fucking school you with one hand tied behind her back. So don't be making threats when you can't back them up."
"Why is she picking on me?"
"Why are you picking on her is more like it. What did she ever do to you? You don't even know her and you're talking all kinds of crap about her to people. Carmen and Hawkes? Not smart. And you won't be winning any Brownie points with me talking shit about my wife so knock it off."
"I'm trying to be her friend."
Flack snorted. "Sure you are. You gotta hell of a way of going about it."
"She started in on me. Just because she doesn't like the idea of us working together, doesn't give her the right to be like that."
"Max, she's almost four months pregnant and majorly hormonal. Not to mention we've got some stress with the baby right now and…."
"What kind of stress?"
"None of your business. I'm just making a point that she's dealing with a lot and I want you to back off and stop antagonizing her. She doesn't need that kind of crap and I'd really appreciate if you'd lay off of her to other people."
"I just can't believe you'd be with someone like that." Max huffed.
"You wanna get out and walk? 'Cause I'll pull over right here and you can walk your ass back to the station or all the way to Far Rockaway."
"Never imagined you'd be with someone so high maintenance." Max said.
Flack saw red and cast a quick glance through the rear view mirror. Making sure traffic was clear, he signalled and steered the car through two lanes of traffic before pulling to a screeching stop at the curb in front of a bodega and putting the car in park.
"Get out." he said simply.
Max stared at him. "You can't be fucking serious."
"I am. Dead serious. Get out. Go back to the precinct or find your own way to Far Rockaway. I don't care what you do. Just get out."
"You're fucking crazy, Flack. I'm not getting out for you or anyone else. Now quit being a prick and lets get to the job already."
"Then you listen to me, Max, and listen to me good. I am not going to just sit here and listen to you run your mouth off about my wife, a woman you don't even know. You don't have the right to pass judgement on her, so get the fuck out or shut your trap. Got it?"
Max blinked at the vehemence in his voice. "Got it." she practically squeaked.
"And another thing, who did you imagine I would be with? Someone like you? Give me a fucking break. You don't even know her, Max. You don't know what her life has been like or what her life with me has been like. She's got issues. No one is denying that. But she's an amazing woman and she's the mother of my unborn child. I love her in ways I never thought I could love someone. So do me a favor and back the hell off."
"You sentimental bastard. Defending your woman's honor."
"Max….." he warned.
She held her hands up in self defence.
Flack shook his head in disgust and put the car back into drive and his foot back onto the gas and started on the way once again.
"Think you could ask her to extend the same to me?" Max asked.
"I'll think about it." he replied.
"'Cause Daria really, really likes her and I think it would be nice if Daria knew your kid, Flack. Or kids if you guys plan on having more. We have to work together and it would be a lot easier if Sam and I could at least attempt a friendship."
"So you actually do know her name." he quipped.
"I'm serious. You think you could pass that along? Help me out a bit here? Help Daria out? She'd love to get to know Sam."
Flack sighed. "I'll try." he said. "But I'm not promising anything. Sam's a big girl and makes her own decisions. If she wants nothing to do with you, you have to accept that and leave her alone from there on out. Can you do that for me?"
I can do a lot for you, Max thought.
"Sure." she replied.
"I'm serious, Max. Don't cause anymore shit."
"I won't. I'm not out to hurt anyone."
Just out to protect myself, she thought.
Shortly after nine on that stormy evening, Samantha and Carmen met up with Gus at Infusions, a small, quaint coffee bar a block from the YMCA that specialized in exotically flavoured coffees and rich, sumptuous desserts made right on the premises. Customers could either lounge in brown leather couches and easy chairs or at individual tables adorned with vanilla scented pillar candles and fresh flower arrangements. Warm laughter and light conversation drifted over top of soft jazz and adult contemporary music piped in through over head speakers. Stella was a regular, and had recommended the spot for their newly organized girls night out. They'd met there twice already and tried to plan for once a week.
They found Gus alone,taking up residence at one of the couches near the back. Sipping a large porcelain mug of double espresso, extra foam and nibbling almond biscotti as she waited for her friends.
"Leave some for us." Carmen joked, shaking out her umbrella before collapsing it and laying it against the wall beside the couch.
"Get your own." Gus laughed. "Look at you two drowned rats. You guys could have called me to come and pick you up."
"We thought we wouldn't drown taking the subway." Carmen said, waving a waitress over. "We were wrong."
"Stella can't make it," Gus told them, as Samantha took a seat beside her and Carmen collapsed into the nearby easy chair. "Mac needed her to stick around and help Hawkes on a case. Erica is running a bit late but she's on her way. How'd the first night of pre-natal classes go?"
"There wasn't much to it." Sam said. "Just signing up and getting to know other couples and getting a suggested reading list and websites to look at. And everyone thinks that Carmen and I are a couple."
Gus arched an eyebrow.
Carmen nodded in confirmation. "And Sam decided that she wants to give birth in a tub at the hospital."
"Come again?" Gus asked.
"Water birth." Sam told her excitedly. "It's wild. In one of them Jacuzzi type tubs. Apparently the jets hit all your pressure points and relax you and give you natural pain relief. And considering I can't have an epidural because of the tattoo on my back, I will take pain relief whatever way it comes."
The waitress came to take their orders. Carmen ordered an extra large black and a slice of cherry pie with vanilla ice cream. Her usual order. Sam asked for a milk steamer with caramel flavoring and strawberry cheesecake.
"And it looks really cool too." Sam continued her tale. "We watched a video about it. I so want to try it."
Carmen eyes widened and she put a finger to her temple and made a circular motion. She's crazy, she mouthed to Gus.
"Something tells me Flack is not the type to go for something like that." Gus said.
"Does he have a choice?" Sam laughed. "I think not. He merely participated in the making of this child. I have to carry it for nine months and get fat. He's done his part."
"That's the best part of all." Carmen told her. "He gets to have his fun and let you deal with the pain and suffering afterwards."
"Yeah? Well he can dream on if he thinks he's not doing three am feedings and changing shitty diapers. I didn't make this kid on my own so I am not taking care of it on my own."
"You know he won't be like that." Carmen said. "He's going to be hands on. He'll be the falling asleep on the couch with the baby on his chest type."
"Is it just me or is that such a cute image?" Gus asked. "Big strong guy, tiny little baby."
"Makes me all warm and tingly inside." Carmen said.
"Really?" Sam asked. "In that case, you and Tim should…"
"Not that warm and tingly." Carmen stopped her.
"You know whose really good with babies and kids?" Sam asked. "Adam."
"Adam?" Carmen responded. "Adam who?"
"My brother, Adam. When we were in Arizona, we had neighbours on our street with kids and he
used to be out there playing with them and chasing them around. The kids would come to our house and ask if he could come out to play. And he was a teenager and they were barely ten. Other parents would recruit him to babysit. He's a natural with babies. So I have no doubt he'll be a great uncle."
"Are we talking about the same Adam?" Carmen asked. "As in your younger brother Adam? Lab tech Adam?"
Sam nodded. "He's going to be a wonderful dad one day."
"Are you taking notes, Gus?" Carmen asked. "This is from a very reliable source?"
If anyone had ever suggested marriage or kids with any of the previous men she'd been involved with, Gus would have been horrified and told them to bite their tongue and that they were insane. But thinking about Adam in that light, as a husband and a father, filled her with such warmth and hope.
And love.
"Hey, guys." Erica greeted as she appeared at their sides. "Raining like hell out there, huh?"
"When it rains it pours." Gus declared. "Trouble getting off shift?"
"Danny made me dinner and we started talking and time seemed to get away from us." Erica shrugged out of her Stella McCartney trench coat and shook it out before hanging it on a nearby hook. "You guys mind if I borrow my cousin for a second? I just need to talk to her about something."
"Sounds serious." Carmen said. "Everything okay."
"Of course." Erica chirped cheerfully, although her stern voice indicated she was anything but cheerful. She was doing her best to hide how furious she actually was. "Sam? Five minutes?"
"Sure." Sam said and stood up, then found herself nearly dragged off by the elbow to the back hallway that led to the washrooms. "What's your issue?" she asked, yanking her arm away.
"My issue?" Erica seethed. "What is your issue! What did you tell Danny about Evan Lucerno?"
"What? Nothing. I wouldn't talk to Danny about personal stuff. Why?"
"When I got home from shift, I barely got my foot in the door and he was on me about what my history was with a Pelham Bay guy. What did you tell him?"
"Nothing." Sam insisted. "I don't talk to Danny about stuff like that."
"Well he knows somehow that I messed around with a boyfriend of yours years ago. How'd he find out about that?"
"Look, I told Don about what happened and he must have told Danny. I don't think he intended to cause you and Danny problems. And if it did, then Danny needs to get a grip about something that happened way before you met him."
"You should have just kept your mouth shut, Samantha. Why'd you tell him anything?"
"Ever heard of honesty, Erica? Don and I have been going through some heavy shit and we're trying to get back on track. And being honest, about everything, is one of the things we both need to concentrate on. He's going to be my husband and I talked to him about things in my past that were bugging me."
"Bugging you? Bugging you? Get a life, Sam. That was sixteen, nearly seventeen years ago. You'd think I'd murdered someone you loved. I slept with your boyfriend. Big fucking deal."
"It was a big fucking deal to me, Erica. You knew what he was saying about me and you still messed around with him. Thanks for being so goddamn loyal to your own flesh and blood."
"You and I were two totally different people back then, Sam. You were half hell raiser, half straight A, goodie two-shoes girl next door student. And I was…."
"A slut?" Sam offered.
"Maybe if you were more of one back then you wouldn't have had the problems you did. You don't have a problem jumping into bed with some guy you barely know now and getting knocked up before you barely know anything about him."
Sam shook her head. "You're reaching there, Erica. You really are. I didn't see you saying no to Danny on your second date. Or moving him into the place you shared with your ex husband. Wait, he isn't even your ex yet, is he? Because you and I both know the divorce isn't even final and you've soaked him for half of everything and moved your new boyfriend in. So don't go passing judgement on me."
"You always were a nasty little bitch, Samantha. Which is why you couldn't keep Evan or Zack happy. They couldn't put up with your bullshit and taught you a lesson. And guess what? When Don gets over the novelty of being in love, he's going to wake up and see what you're really like and I hope he gets the hell away from you and fast."
"First off…." Sam jabbed her finger into her cousin's chest and backed her up against the wall. "Zack was a certified nut job that came to New York to abduct me and do God knows what to me. He beat me and degraded me and made me feel worthless and was letting female motorists off for traffic violations if they gave him head. You know nothing about Zack or my hell with him because while you've been living the high life off your rich husband, the rest of your family has had to sacrifice and put up with shit just to get by from day to day."
"Spare me your poor little girl speech, Samantha. I don't see you suffering now."
"Second, you have no idea what went down between me and Evan and I won't even bother trying to explain it to you because you're incapable of admitting your wrong. And third, and let me make this part very, very clear to you. If you fuck Danny Messer over in any way like you're known to fuck over most of the men you're with, you'll be wishing you never met him."
"Cut you tough girl crap." Erica snorted. "This is exactly why I never bothered with you when you left New York. Too much goddamn drama."
"Well you don't have to bother with me now that I am back in New York." Sam told her, backing away.
"Grow up, Samantha. Is someone like Evan really worth loosing your family over?"
"You apparently thought so sixteen years ago." Sam said and headed down the hall, leaving her cousin standing there, staring after her in shock.
Three a.m. Thankfully the thunderstorm had passed. The rain had ceased and the wind had stopped rattling the windows. Leaving a cloudless, black sky with a half moon and thousands of twinkling stars behind. The temperature had dipped even lower and without the engine running, Flack and Max were relegated to shivering in their seats.
"My ass is getting sore." Max complained, yawning noisily. She'd been on watch for an hour now while Flack, his seat as far back as it could go, legs stretched out, was relaxing with his eyes closed.
No sign of their suspect. No sign of anything whatsoever as a matter of fact. No lights or movements inside of the house.
"Get out and stretch your legs." Flack suggested.
"And risk someone coming out of there and seeing me. I don't think so."
"Face it, Max. We're going to sit here all night with no action."
"Back seat action is good too. " she joked.
He snorted. "Only in your wildest and wettest." he said.
"Hey, remember that time you and I…."
"No." he answered quickly. He wasn't in the mood to be taking a trip down memory lane, especially when it was a topic he had no intention of conversing about. Or actions he was considering repeating. On top of it, he'd forgotten to bring any pain meds and the cold and damp was causing his hand to throb like a bastard.
His cell phone, resting on the dash rang noisily and his eyes snapped open and he checked his watch. He frowned, his heart beginning to pound in his chest as he leaned forward and snatch his phone. Only time a call came in at that time of the morning was when it was bad news. He checked the call display and was filled with the worst sense of dread.
"Fuck…" he muttered and pressed talk. "What's wrong?" he asked in way of answering. "Are you okay? Please tell me you're okay."
Beside him Max cleared her throat and rolled her eyes.
"Good morning to you too." Sam's sleepy voice said.
"Are you okay?" Flack asked.
"I'm fine."
"No cramps or bleeding or…."
"Donnie…" her voice was quiet and soothing. "I'm fine. I just couldn't sleep so I thought I'd phone you and see how things were going."
"They're going. Slowly. Nothing's come up yet. Are you sure you're okay? Why can't you sleep?"
She yawned noisily. "I feel weird." she said.
"What do you mean you feel weird? In what way?"
"I thought I was having hunger pains so I got up to eat something about two hours ago. And these pains went away after I ate but came back again when I lied down. And it's been on and off since."
"What kind of pain?" Flack asked.
"Weird pain. And not really pain. More like sensations."
"Well what do they feel like? Help me out here."
"I don't know. I guess it feels like fish swimming around. Or butterflies. Yeah…..butterflies is a better word for it."
A grin spread from ear to ear when he realized what she was talking about. "Samantha…..that's the baby…..he's moving around…."
"What? Can't be. The book said that wouldn't happen until sixteen weeks."
"What the book says is that that's the most common time to feel kicking. Between sixteen and twenty one weeks. Hawkes told you that some women, especially really tiny ones like you, can feel it sooner. Like that lady on the 'net that said she felt her second kid at ten weeks."
"You think that's what it is?" she asked, excited despite how tired she was.
"I think so." Flack replied.
"Hmmm…..not what I expected it to feel like."
"What did you expect?"
"I don't know. Stronger I guess. Like real kicks."
"Baby's still tiny, sweetie. You'll be feeling it for real when you're farther along."
"You mean when he's playing soccer with my bladder and making me piss my pants?"
"Exactly. Then you'll be wishing he'd calm down for a bit. I wish I was there to go through this with you."
"I know. But you've got to keep the city safe and sound. And I don't think you'd be able to feel much of anything anyway."
"Still…." Flack said.
"You're okay?" Sam asked.
"I'm good. Especially after this. Make sure you write down the date and time and all that in that book I bought you. That pregnancy moments book."
"I will." she assured him and yawned noisily. "Well now that I heard your voice and I know everything is okay, I am going to go to bed."
"Okay…. I'll be home when I can. I love you."
"I love you, too." she said. "Good night…"
"Good…..wait….wait…don't hang up….you there?"
"I'm here." she said.
"Do me a favor. Put the phone to your stomach and…"
"You won't be able to hear anything, Donnie…"
"Just do it." he said. "Humor me."
She sighed. "Fine. Give me a second. You are so weird sometimes."
"You love me." he said.
"Okay….go ahead….."
"Listen you little shit, stop bugging your mom and go to sleep so she can get her rest."
Max stared at him like he was crazy.
"Happy?" Sam asked. "You made the pain come back."
"Kid recognizes my voice all ready. He knows who the boss is."
She laughed lightly. "Whatever. Can I go to bed?"
"I really do wish I was there, Sam."
"Stop being such a sap before you make me cry. I'll see you when you get in. Wake me up, okay?"
"Okay." he said. "Get some sleep."
"I will." she told him and hung up.
Flack was still grinning when he hung up his own phone and tossed it on the dashboard. "What?" he asked Max when he noticed the way she was looking at him.
"Nothing." she replied, deciding it was best to keep her mouth shut. She reached for her own phone and in the process, knocked his onto the floor of the car between them. When it hit, it bounced and went under his feet.
Flack turned sideways in his seat and leaned down to fish his phone off the floor. He managed to get a hold of it, and when he started to sit up, noticed that Max had bent down to retrieve it as well and their faces were a mere inches apart.
She laid her hand on the side of his face and leaned in even closer.
He jerked back when the realization of what she was attempting hit him. Pulling away so quickly and forcibly that he smacked the back of his head off the driver's side window.
"Fuck!" he bellowed and grabbed the back of his head.
"You okay?" Max asked, reaching for him to check his head.
"What the fuck was that?" Flack snapped at her. "What is wrong with you?"
"I'm sorry, Don…..I…."
"You're sorry? You tried to kiss me!"
"It was a moment. The way you looked at me…."
"I didn't look at you in any way. What is your issue? What more do I have to say to you, Max? I'm not interested! I've got a wife and a kid on the way!"
"I'm sorry. I just thought maybe…"
"Well you thought wrong. Don't ever do that again! Don't ever even think about doing it again. Understand me?"
Max felt herself flush from head to toe and tears well in her eyes. "I said I was sorry."
"You should be. I'm serious. Don't ever try anything like that again."
"What? Afraid you'll like it?"
"You know what!" Flack snatched the walkie talkie from between the seats and radioed dispatch. He'd had enough bullshit for one night from Emma Maxwell. Ten minutes ago he was elated that his kid kicked for the first time and now this. Too much.
"What are you doing?" Max asked.
He gave his location to the dispatcher and requested a squad car come to his location to transport his partner back to the precinct. And to bring a back up detective from the twelve.
"You can't do that!" Max fumed when he was finished.
"Yeah? Well I just did! You're done, Max. For tonight at least. And if you try anything like that again, you'll be done for good. Understand me?"
She nodded and sunk into her seat.
The worst ending to an even worse day.
It was shortly after ten in the morning when Flack finally dragged himself into the front door of his apartment. He and Scagnetti, who'd replaced Max, had managed to get away from the surveillance at eight in the morning when their relief showed up. But paper work and an explanation to Gerrard why he'd yanked Max off the job had earned Flack another two hours of work.
And he had to get up at four p.m. and be ready to go all over again for seven.
Samantha was in the living room. Sitting cross legged on the couch in a pair of white girl's boxers with Care Bears on them and one of his t-shirts. Eating a gigantic bowl of Lucky Charms. A huge glass of orange juice on the coffee table in front of her as she watched Maury Povich. The show was her addiction.
"Good morning." he said, bending down to kiss the top of her head.
"You're late." she told him.
"I know. I didn't want to call and wake you up."
He undid his tie and tossed it and his jacket on the back of the couch. He pulled his shirt out of his pants and unbuttoned it before sitting down beside her.
"How'd it go?" Sam asked.
"Nothing. No sign of our guy." Flack replied. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. "Any more movement?"
"Not yet. But the day is young."
He cracked open an eye at the sound of a couple fighting on the t.v. "Whose the daddy?" he asked.
"This is the seventh guy tested for this one baby." Sam replied.
"Yeah? And?"
"He says he's not the father. Personally, I don't think he is either. But I could be wrong. Can you imagine? Seven different men? You can conceive four days out of a month. So she was with almost two guys a day."
"That's nasty." Flack declared.
"I promise you that it's between you and only three others." Sam teased.
He frowned. "Very goddamn funny, Ross."
She finished her cereal and juice and put the dishes on the coffee table. Flicking off the t.v., she tucked her stretched her legs out and moved closer to him, laying her head on his chest.
He reached behind him, pulled the throw off the back of the coach and covered both of them with it.
"We should go to bed." she said sleepily.
"We will." he assured her, wrapping his arm around her. His other hand rested softly on her growing stomach. Just in case that kid decided to kick. He didn't want to miss it a second time. Even if she did say he wouldn't feel anything.
"Let's just sit here for a bit." he said. "Okay?"
"Okay." she yawned and rested her hand on his stomach and closed her eyes.
They were silent for a long time. Outside the mid morning sun streamed down and the birds chirped.
"I wanna give birth in the tub." Sam announced.
"Excuse me?" Flack snapped out of his semi conscious state.
"A birthing tub. At the hospital." she explained.
"Why?" he asked.
"It sounds neat." was her reply.
"Doesn't mean we have to try it. Can we talk about this later when I'm not half comatose?"
She nodded. "Or we can have a home birth and switch to a mid wife."
"You know how I feel about that. I want my kid born in a hospital. With doctors and nurses right there in case something goes wrong. The tub thing…..we can talk about that. But later, okay?"
"Later." she agreed and snuggled into his chest.
"Anything else I need to know?" he asked.
"Yeah……I love you."
He smiled and kissed the top of her head. "I love you, too." he said and closed his eyes once more.
They'd stay there until well into the afternoon.
EmSyd: Welcome to my baby! I hope you keep loving it
Aphina: did the cold shower help? LOL. Sam's revelation was a last minute add on. And Danny and Flack…no one can ever have too much Danny and Flack.
Hope: thanks for all your help with that talk. I appreciate it. We're finally getting to understand why Sam is the way she is sometimes. And Flack is growing up fast.
Mauveine: better late than never. I love your reviews and they're well worth the wait
Blue: Was it smutty enough? LOL. I am glad you enjoyed it
Laplandgurl: Flack and Pelham will meet up in an odd, coincidental way. And if you ask me, us Canadians need more holidays.
Soccer: My faithful! More to come!
Maddy: More Erica to come. And I am trying to get more into Flack and his thoughts and struggles. Not always easy with him
much madness: Intense Flack. I love intense Flack. And he'll be even more so when he meets the Pelham Bay guy. Let's just say he's a relative of someone from Tanglewood in season 1
Brrtmclv: that alert thing was a pain in the a We found each other at least. I needed oxygen just writing that part. Lots more to come
ImasupernaturalCSI: That Pelham kid is going to hate being himself when Flack gets to him
Eva: Flack sure has a way with words. LOL. And yeah, the way he loves her….it's the kind of love we all wish we had but seldom find. I know, corny. I stole that line from James Cameron when he was talking about Jack and Rose in Titanic. LOL.