Chapter three
Daria had finished with her schoolwork and decided to chance seeing what the rest of her family was up to. She left her room and headed downstairs. In the living room, Quinn was watching TV; Daria ignored her and continued to the kitchen, figuring she needed a refreshment.
In the kitchen, Daria was surprised to see that the ceiling light fixture was missing and that a gaping hole and loose wires had replaced it.
Jake was standing on the table and reading what appeared to be an instruction manual. He apparently was trying to fix the ceiling light and seemed to be having a bit of trouble.
Daria stopped to watch him.
"Dammit," Jake swore, still reading the manual. "Where does it say which wire is which?" he said touching the group of wires on examination.
"Maybe a little light will make things easier," Daria teased, reaching for the light switch.
"No! Daria, don't!" Jake yelled, fearfully.
Daria smirked. "I was joking, dad," she said and went to the fridge to get an Ultra Cola.
Jake was relieved and went back to looking at the wires. "Was the green one always here?" he questioned to himself.
Daria left Jake to his work and went into the living room. Quinn was still watching TV.
Daria stood behind the couch and looked at the show. A man was changing a tire on an SUV in a snowstorm. Daria was surprised to see Quinn wipe at her eyes with a tissue.
"The man who rescued Donna that snowy Christmas Eve was no ordinary roadside mechanic. The authorities have no record of his existence, but someone, or something, fixed the tire on her sport utility vehicle. To this day, Donna believes it was...a guardian angel," said the announcer.
Quinn sniffed back her tears.
Daria rolled her eyes in disbelief.
"Too bad the angel didn't fix Donna's brakes before she flattened that family in the hatchback," Daria said drolly.
"You shouldn't make fun, Daria. There are some mysteries that are just beyond our knowledge," Quinn warned.
"Like, the fact that the human ego is bloated enough to believe that the force that created the universe gives a crap about our blowouts," Daria challenged.
"You wouldn't say that if your life were touched by an angel," Quinn argued.
"I'd be too busy suing for harassment," Daria said irritated.
"Daria!" Quinn said scandalized. "Don't even joke like that. Angels are everywhere; they can hear you," she chastised.
"Then I'm going to my room so we can talk about you behind your back," Daria said annoyed and walked up the stairs.
"Some people just won't listen to logic," she heard Quinn say.
Daria scowled and entered her room, closing her bedroom door, grateful that it was soundproof and kept noise out.
English Literature was the last class of the day and Daria couldn't wait for the bell to ring. Jane sat next to her, doodling as she usually did, tuning out the current discussion. Daria knew that, once again, she would have to fill her in.
Daria had been watching Jane for a moment before she was brought back to reality by Mr. O'Neill asking a question.
"All right, why did the soothsayer tell Caesar to 'Beware of the Ides of March'?" Mr. O'Neill asked looking around the class, "Who wants to 'take a stab'?" he said and laughed lightly.
"How much you wanna bet only he getsit, well, besides you?" Jane whispered to Daria, not letting up her attention from her drawing.
Daria looked at her surprised. "So you are paying attention?" she accused hushed.
"Not really, but it's a bit distracting when you keep staring over my shoulder," Jane said, and then looked up at Daria, grinning.
Daria blushed deeply, "Sorry," she muttered.
"I wasn't complaining," Jane assured.
"Ah, Kevin," Mr. O'Neill said.
"And that's my cue…," Jane said, tuning the world out again for her sketching.
Daria, however, turned her attention back to the discussion, although, wondering why. It was Kevin answering, or at least trying to.
"Um, because the Ides were gonna do something mean to him?" Kevin answered unsurely.
Daria smirked. Only Kevin could answer a question with a question that was supposed to be an answer.
Mr. O'Neill slightly frowned, "The Ides aren't people. They're a time of the month," he explained.
"Eww, gross. Well, there's your answer," Kevin said revolted.
Mr. O'Neill looked at Kevin confused, but didn't press.
"At least he's consistent with his lack of knowledge," Daria said, mildly entertained.
Jane chuckled and put her sketchbook away.
Mr. O'Neill looked at the clock; class was coming to an end. "Oh, class, before we go, Brittany has an announcement to make," he said.
Brittany stood, "I just wanted to tell everyone that my dad and stepmom are throwing a party for me on Saturday for getting a C-minus average last semester," she said, "There's gonna be a band and everyone's invited, even the unpopular people," she said in her usual squeak.
"Oh, stop," Jane said, mock embarrassment.
The bell rang.
Jane and Daria grabbed their backpacks and left the classroom.
"Thank God," Jane said, stretching.
Daria glared at her. Jane looked at her confused.
"What?" Jane asked.
Daria shook her head, realizing that Jane didn't know about the angel dispute she was having with Quinn.
"You seem tense," Jane commented as they left the school grounds and walked their usual route home.
"It's nothing. Or, at least nothing I want to talk about," Daria said firmly.
Jane nodded and knew not to press Daria; it would only cause them to fight. Jane decided to change the subject.
"So…I noticed you watching me," Jane began, smirking at Daria.
Daria rolled her eyes, "Nothing else to do," she remarked, shrugging, but had a light hue to her cheeks.
"Right," Jane said skeptically, but was greatly amused.
They continued walking in silence. Jane musing and, secretly, watching Daria.
Jane found that she liked teasing Daria more now that they were together. True, she used to do it when they were still just friends, but Daria seemed more vulnerable to it nowadays. Daria wasn't so quick to fight back because she was usually trying to hide a blush or her light embarrassment. Jane thought it was fun, and that Daria really was too cute in her bashfulness. Jane was truly happy and liked knowing that Daria was hers now. Jane still couldn't believe her good fortune.
Jane looked around and saw that no one was walking along their block. She stopped Daria, pulled her close and kissed her passionately.
Daria didn't resist her, but she only kissed her back a few seconds and then pulled away. Daria's blush now darkened considerably. She looked at Jane surprised.
"What was that for?" Daria asked, not at all upset.
"I've wanted to do that all day. I couldn't wait 'til we got indoors," Jane said casually, smiling, and continued walking.
Daria followed her, falling into step. "I know you hate hiding…," Daria began apologetic.
"Oh, I wasn't complaining; just explaining," Jane reassured quickly.
"I know, but I just wanted you to know. I feel like you initiate a lot of what we do and I don't want you to think I have a huge problem with it-us, or something," Daria said honestly.
"I know you don't," Jane said. "I don't mind. Promise," she said firmly.
Daria nodded, "Just making sure."
"So, you want to hang out at my house?" Jane asked.
Daria's mood darkened a bit as she thought about it.
"Sure. No one is likely to be at your house, right?" Daria asked seriously.
"Well, I haven't spoken to him, but No one did promise to drop by today, if that's all right with you," Jane said smiling.
Daria looked at her confused, and then caught onto the joke. She gave a half-smile and rolled her eyes.
Daria smirked. "I think you need to stay out of the sun."
"Just trying to bring you out of your mood; you're no fun once you've gotten irritated," Jane said.
"I'm fun?" Daria asked feigning surprise.
"You know what I mean," Jane deadpanned.
"Meaning you won't get any," Daria said, raising an eyebrow.
Jane smiled mischievously, "You know me so well, my darling," she said.
"Ugh, I told you not to call me that," Daria said disgusted.
Jane smiled, "I know, but it vexes you so, and you're so cute when you're vexed," she said.
Daria blushed, "I think us being together has perverted you more so than normal," she said, "I don't remember you acting like this with Tom," she reprimanded.
Jane shrugged, "Tom wasn't as cute when he blushed or got angry," she teased lightly.
"Uh-huh," Daria said.
"All right, all teasing aside. For now. Why don't you want to be home, or should I say, be around Quinn other then the normal reasons?" Jane said, "What are you guys fighting about this time?"
Daria glared at her. "Who said we were fighting?" she said, and then sighed, "All right, we are, sort of, but I don't want to discuss it now."
"Meaning we'll have to discuss it eventually, though," Jane said, "Why don't we just discuss it now and get it out of the way?"
Daria smirked, "I thought you wanted to keep me in a good mood," she teased.
Jane grinned, "Are we promising something, 'cause if we are then we never have to discuss anything ever again," she said.
"Down, Jane," Daria said, rolling her eyes, amused.
They walked up to Jane's door.
"All right, I'm letting it go as long as when we get to my room…," Jane said stopping and pulling Daria close to kiss her, "You drop the mood," she said, pulling back.
"Fine," Daria conceded and kissed Jane lightly.
Jane opened the door, holding Daria's hand, and led her into the house. Jane stopped a few feet in and lightly groaned; sitting in the kitchen were Trent, Max, Nick, and Jesse.
"Now I'm in a mood," Jane said, letting go of Daria's hand.
"Guess No one showed up," Daria remarked.
Jane sighed, "At school, now at home," she muttered darkly, closing the door.
Daria gave her a sympathetic smile.
They walked over to the four guys to see what they were discussing.
"Hmm, I'm just not sure that high schoolers are mature enough to appreciate what you're saying," Trent said thoughtfully.
"High schoolers?" Jane inquired, curiously.
Trent looked up at her and Daria. "Yeah, we got a gig this weekend at a high school party," he said and then grimaced, "Ugh, makes me feel like I'm back in high school," he said.
Jane smirked. "I wouldn't worry about it, Trent. Unless you suddenly find yourself doing algebra problems, I think you're safe," she said.
Trent shivered, "Algebra…eww," he said.
Daria looked at the group, "Wait a minute. Is this Brittany's party?" she asked.
"Yeah, you guys should come," Max said.
Trent nodded and looked at the girls, "We could use the moral support," he said.
Jane nodded, and then looked at Daria with a small smile, "All right, but the support will be amoral at best," she said.
Daria was lightly amused.
"Cool. So, what are you guys up to?" Trent asked Jane and Daria.
They looked at each other innocently.
"Homework," Daria answered simply.
"You guys gonna be here long?" Jane asked Trent.
Trent gave her an apologetic expression, "Yeah; working on songs for the party," he said.
Jane nodded, "All right, well, we'll let you get back to…whatever," she said.
"We'll try not to bother you," Trent said.
Jane gave him an appreciative smile and grabbed Daria's arm, "Come on," she said.
Daria waved at Trent, "Later," she said.
"Later," Trent said.
Jane and Daria disappeared down the hall to Jane's room, while the band continued discussing music.
Jane pulled Daria into her room and immediately started kissing her.
Daria kissed her back for a moment and then pulled away from Jane's attack. Jane looked at her disappointed.
"Sorry, but I don't feel comfortable with that many guys in the house," Daria said, putting her backpack on the floor, "It's weird."
"Yeah, well, I don't mind," Jane said annoyed, "Beggars can't be choosers," she muttered.
Daria looked at her resentfully. "I know that we hardly ever get the kind of privacy you want, but I don't feel comfortable," she said, slightly irritated.
Jane sighed, wanting to keep Daria out of a bad mood. She walked over and kissed her forehead, "All right, don't worry about it," she said and walked over to open the sheet-curtains of the window.
"We'll find some time, okay," Daria said earnestly.
"Yeah, when humanity ceases to exist," Jane muttered darkly, forgetting the truce.
"Do you really want to fight about this?" Daria said reproachful.
Jane looked at her contemplatively. "Not fight, necessarily," she said innocently.
Daria glared at her, "Then?"
"I'm sorry," Jane conceded. "It's just that I could literally count on one hand how many times we've really made out. We don't kiss outside of your house or mine, unless we're sure we're alone. We have to hide at school and everywhere else and I understand that, but…no one can see us here, in my room. Or, when we're at your house in your room," she said frustrated.
Daria sat on Jane's bed and looked at her.
"I know all that, but…it just feels weird with Trent and his friends around. Or, when my sister and her friends are at my house," Daria said. "And I still think it's weird that Trent knows about us. I don't like the idea that he might think that we're doing stuff when we're alone," she said awkwardly.
"Trent doesn't care and so what that he knows. It's not like he's going to fantasize about us or something," Jane said and then grimaced. "Forget I said that. Now, I get it," she said slightly uncomfortable.
Daria shook her head, amused. "Exactly. However, I wasn't going for that angle, but thank you. Now I can feel even more uncomfortable when I'm around him," she said and then looked at Jane seriously. "And I don't like that the physical thing is becoming an issue."
Jane looked at her. "It's not. And I'm not dating you just for that. If that's what you're implying," she said truthfully.
Daria shrugged. "I don't know. I mean, I know the relationships you had with guys have been more physical than we are…," she said.
"I don't have a problem with it. I guess…I just worry that with the lack of physical contact you might want to revert to being just friends again, or that somehow we'll just slip back into that unknowingly," Jane admitted worriedly.
"We won't. I like being with you. Honest. I guess, I'm just still getting used to us being us," Daria said.
Jane nodded and lay on the bed next to Daria and sighed. "I hate this, you know?"
Daria turned to look at her. "What?"
"I just…," Jane started but paused, troubled.
"Yeah?" Daria said uneasily.
"I just want us to be like everyone else, you know? It shouldn't matter that we're two girls dating," Jane said pensively. "I mean, it's completely messed up that I could be seen dating those loser guys-guys that I wasn't even taking seriously-and not worry, but I get with the you, who I am serious about and…I can't actually be with you because someone else might have a problem with it."
Daria sighed and lay back on the bed. "I know exactly how you feel. Minus the dating loser guys part," she said with a small smile.
Jane looked at her, amused. "It sucks," she said simply.
Daria nodded. "I know, but I just don't want to have to deal with these Lawndale idiots, yet; I don't want us to have to struggle more then we have to," she said honestly.
"I get it. Also, if it were to get back to your parents…we still don't know how your parents would react. I know they like me as your friend, but who knows how they'd feel about us dating," Jane said.
Daria shrugged, "It's not them I'm really worried about," she said.
"Oh?" Jane said surprised.
"I like that it's just us and that only we know," Daria said, taking Jane's hand and twining their fingers, "I like not having to fight the world, at least yet."
"Me, too," Jane smiled, and lightly kissed Daria.
Daria let it turn into more, but then they heard the guys laugh loudly from the kitchen.
Jane stopped the kiss and sighed, "Okay. I don't think I could tune them out," she said and moved away from Daria.
Daria felt disappointed, but didn't say anything.
Jane grabbed the remote from the floor and turned on the TV. She gave the remote to Daria, "Here, you watch TV. I wanna finish a painting," she said and got up.
Jane uncovered her easel and set up her paints. Daria watched her, frowning, then sighed and settled on the bed.
Daria hated the way Jane got when she didn't get her way, because she usually went straight into painting and ignoring her. Daria knew that was a complaint Tom had made and Jane liked that she didn't complain about it. Therefore, Daria knew she had to be careful about what she said when she wanted to spend time with Jane and it interrupted one of her painting sessions.
Daria started channel flipping. She stopped on their favorite show, Sick, Sad World.
"Back from beyond the grave, and he still won't pay child support! Undead deadbeat dads, next on Sick, Sad World," said the announcer and the show went to commercial.
Daria looked at Jane; she was already lost in her world.
They had been together for two months now and Daria was still worried about being found out. She wasn't worried so much about what people would say or think, or that she was ashamed of the relationship. She just wanted to wait until she and Jane had really settled and were comfortable with each other. Otherwise, it would be tougher to deal with people being against them and to try to be together through it. They didn't need the hardship so early in the relationship.
Daria knew that Jane hated hiding, and she did, too. There were many times when she wanted to be able to hold Jane's hand or share a kiss in public but had been too afraid. She knew Jane felt the same. They both hated seeing all the straight couples literally groping each other so candidly in the school halls with no one saying a thing.
And that was another thing Daria was also getting used to, Jane being such a physical being. Their relationship hadn't changed much except that when they were alone Jane just wanted to kiss and touch a lot. Daria liked the physical part, too, but didn't want it to be the only thing they did together. However, when Daria didn't want to be physical with Jane, Jane usually started a fight about it. Daria knew it was because Jane took it as rejection of them being a couple.
Daria didn't mean it like that and she never thought of it as such. She just didn't want their relationship to turn purely physical. She like that Jane could still be her best friend.
The show came back on, but Daria had tuned it out. She just watched Jane from her peripheral vision, not wanting to be teased anymore about watching her.
Jane was so content in painting and Daria liked seeing her that way. Jane may like to see her emotional, probably because she hardly showed any emotions, but Daria liked seeing Jane at peace. Daria also liked that she caused some of that peace.
Daria liked it best when Jane just wanted to be with her, without the need to be physical. Daria liked when they could just lie together in each other's arms and watch TV or talk. Daria found that was when she was happiest, but she never told Jane that because she felt a little embarrassed about it. However, she figured if she told Jane her feelings maybe Jane wouldn't run to painting so often when she got upset at them not being able to be together romantically.
"So where do you want to hook up before the C-minus fest? Here or your house?" Jane asked suddenly, not stopping her painting.
Daria looked at her startled, "Huh?" she said.
"Brittany's party," Jane said amused, looking at her now.
Daria looked at her confused, "You don't like when people are around because we can't be alone and now you want to purposely go to a place full of people where there's not chance of us being alone?" she asked.
"Yeah? Besides, we already told Trent we were going," Jane said.
"I thought you were kidding," Daria admitted.
"Come on, it'll be fun. We get to spend some time together outside in the world," Jane said.
Daria gave her a dry look. "I remember the last party we went to at the Taylor's house," she said as the memory of Jane being alone in a laundry room with a dork surfaced. It somewhat bothered her, but she reminded herself they hadn't been together then. It shouldn't matter. "We could spend some time together here. Trent would be gone," she said.
Jane frowned slightly, "Okay, so no good examples to persuade you, but I kind of want to go. Plus, we need to get out more," Jane said resuming her painting.
Daria sighed and then after a moment said, "Fine."
"That's the spirit!" Jane said enthusiastically.
"Spirit?" Daria questioned disgusted.
Jane gave her a small smile, "Sorry."
"Apology accepted, but you owe me," Daria said seriously.
Jane gave her a mischievous grin and walked over to her. She kissed Daria lightly, "I owe you," she promised.
Daria blushed, but smiled and pulled Jane closer to prolong the kiss, forgetting about the four guys in the kitchen.
Daria walked into the kitchen and sat down for dinner. Helen was finishing cooking dinner and Jake was at the table reading a book. Her mother placed a plate of meat and vegetables in front of her.
"Well, I'll be damned, so that's why they call it a male plug," Jake said fascinated.
Daria decided that it was best not to ask. She started eating.
Helen walked back over with a plate for Jake. She looked at Quinn's chair. "Where's Quinn?" Helen asked.
Daria looked up from her plate, "I warned you, remove those Day-Glo arrows from the floor and she gets all confused," she said.
Helen gave her a small smile and was about to reply, but Quinn came into the kitchen. She was reading a book as she sat down.
"Quinn is that a book you've got?" Helen asked, trying to keep the astonishment out of her voice.
"Sorry to give away the surprise, but in the end he eats the green eggs and the ham," Daria teased and then resumed eating.
"For your information, I'm reading about real-life people who've had encounters with guardian angels," Quinn retorted.
"Oh, I know that book, Chicken soup for the stupid," Daria said calmly.
Quinn ignored her, "I just finished a story about a family whose house caught on fire and the cat saved their baby's life," she said.
"Technically, that's a guardian cat," Daria pointed out smugly.
Jake looked up from his book and caught the conversation, but completely missed the point.
"You know, I wanted a cat when I was little, but my father never let me have one, 'Dogs are for boys, cats are for girls'," he started and ended up in one of his usual rants, "Well, you know what dad, I didn't want a dog, okay!" he shouted to no one in particular.
Helen looked over Jake's shoulder at the book he had been engrossed with, "Oh, my, aren't those diagrams fascinating," she said hoping it would distract him.
He looked, "Yeah," Jake said going back to his book.
Helen was relieved at not having to hear another rant and turned her attention back to her daughters.
"Quinn, I think it's wonderful that you're discovering your spiritual side," Helen said approvingly.
Daria frowned at her mother for what she considered feeding into the delusion.
Quinn smiled, "Thanks, I think I'm very spiritual," she said.
Helen went back to the stove to prepare a plate for herself and Quinn.
"Yes, you take after your mother in that," Helen said proudly.
Daria looked at Helen incredulously, "You work fourteen hour days helping giant corporations find loopholes to skim on their taxes," she accused.
"See, you said it yourself; helping," Helen said twisting Daria's words, "That's spiritual."
"Ugh," Daria said frustrated and pushed her plate away.
"That's okay, mom, Daria just can't understand because she's so unspiritual," Quinn said smugly, "You know, I think I'll finish dinner in my room; I don't want to be disturbed," she said.
"Too late," Daria remarked.
Quinn ignored her and stood up, with her plate and book in hand. As soon as she moved just a few inches away, the light fixture that Jake had just installed fell from the ceiling and onto the chair Quinn had just occupied.
Quinn and Helen looked at it in shock.
"Dammit, my fixture!" Jake swore, oblivious to the danger his youngest daughter had just missed.
"Oh, Quinn, that just missed you!" Helen said startled.
Jake changed tactic, "I mean, yeah, are you all right sweetie?" he said compassionately.
"Oh, my gosh, if I hadn't gotten up at just that second, that would have hit my head," Quinn said still stunned and upset.
"Or something vital," Daria deadpanned.
"Someone, or something, told me to get out of that chair," Quinn exclaimed, "Don't you see, this is proof that I have a guardian angel!"
Daria scowled darkly.
Daria had been in a bad mood all morning. Jane had tried to inquire, but Daria said nothing.
It was first break, and Daria and Jane were at Daria's locker so that she could put her stuff away. However, a conversation caught Daria's attention.
Daria saw Quinn with her friends Tiffany and Stacy just a little ways away. Jane looked, too, when she saw Daria's mood darken at their presence.
"And something just pulled me out of my chair seconds before that light came crashing down," Quinn said dramatically.
"Wow, a real-life miracle," Stacy said in awe.
"Like in that movie about the bible," Tiffany drawled.
Sandi walked over to them, "I can't believe Ms. Barch banned phones in study hall," she complained, oblivious that Quinn had just been speaking, "What am I supposed to do in there for an hour?"
Quinn looked at Sandi and then her eyes widened, "Eeeh! Your sweater!" she exclaimed.
Sandi scowled at her. "Isn't it rude when people try to pretend they don't like something you're wearing because they're secretly jealous," she said moodily.
"No, Sandi. I almost bought that exact same sweater, but something told me not to," Quinn explained.
"Could that something be a mirror," Sandi said irritated, "Because a sweater like this only looks good on a very tall and lean figure," she said derisively.
"No, no, no, my guardian angel told me not to get the sweater, because he knew you already had it," Quinn insisted.
"Your guardian angel is a guy?" Tiffany asked.
"I think so, I mean, whenever I talk to him about low-fat yogurt flavors he seems very detached," Quinn said thoughtfully.
Sandi gave Quinn a disbelieving look, "Quinn maybe you better stop putting your coats into storage until we know the effects of mothball fumes on the human brain," she teased.
"No, Sandi, Quinn really does have a guardian angel," Stacy said.
"He saved her life," Tiffany said.
"And, he found this earring I was missing since last September," Quinn added, showing the earrings on her ears.
Sandi smirked, "But if a guardian angel is supposed to help you, why would he find an earring that's so…eighties," she said self-satisfied.
Stacy looked confused and torn, "Gee, Sandi, that's a good question," she said looking at Quinn.
"Yeah, it's relevant," Tiffany said also looking at Quinn.
"I guess there are some mysteries that are beyond our knowledge," Quinn said enigmatically.
Stacy and Tiffany nodded in agreement while Sandi rolled her eyes.
Daria slammed her locker and started walking away with Jane.
"Guardian angel, huh?" Jane said.
"At least he doesn't leave the milk out, like when the Trix Rabbit was staying with us," Daria quipped.
Jane gave a short laugh, "I guess I can count you among the skeptics," she said.
Daria shrugged, "Let's put it this way, in my spiritual universe, if there are guardian angels, they don't care if you leave the house in clogs," she stated annoyed.
Jane nodded and decided not to say anymore on the subject since Daria was upset about it already.
Daria and Jane had just come back from Lunch. They had eaten on the bleachers in the lower field. Jane figured that Daria had enough of Quinn and her guardian angel for the day so they stayed away from the cafeteria. Unfortunately, Quinn's angel was brought back up.
Daria was at her locker again, collecting her afternoon classes' textbooks, and saw the Fashion Club speaking together.
She and Jane heard Sandi speak, "I don't understand why you're making such a big deal out of this, Quinn," Sandi said annoyed.
"Hey, she agrees with you," Jane said.
Daria glared at her, but said nothing. She just grabbed her History book and English Lit. book.
Jane focused back on the conversation.
"Really, that's great Sandi," Quinn said trying to sound truly excited, "What kinds of things does he do for you?"
"Well, today in the cafeteria, my angel told me to have the raspberry vinaigrette dressing, because it will make my hair extra luminous," Sandi said superiorly.
"I had the same dressing; I wonder if my hair will get more luminous?" Stacy said thoughtfully.
"But you always eat salad with vinaigrette dressing," Quinn said to Sandi confused.
"I'm sorry, Quinn, maybe you should tell my angel to stop being so consistent," Sandi said irritated and suddenly covered her mouth.
Quinn looked at her concerned, "Sandi, is everything okay?" she asked.
"Uh, gotta go!" Sandi said and rushed off.
"Oh, I feel really sick," Tiffany moaned.
"Me, too," Stacy said and touched her stomach.
"I feel fine," Quinn said cheerfully.
"I think it was the salad dressing," Tiffany said and then she and Stacy ran off.
Quinn stood alone, amazed, "Someone, or something, stopped me from eating that dressing," she said in awe.
Daria scowled, unable not to pay attention, "I didn't have it either, but I still feel like I'm gonna be sick," Daria said to Jane.
Jane gave her a sympathetic expression, "Well, Amiga, I'd say you just have two more classes for the day, but you live with her, so…," she said.
Daria sharply glared at her. Jane put her hands up in surrender.
"Sorry," Jane said and they headed for their History class.
Daria sat in front of the TV in the living room. It was on mute. She wasn't really watching it anyway. She was feeling annoyed that Quinn was still milking the whole guardian angel thing. She was just grateful that Quinn was in her room right now.
Helen came into the living room from the kitchen and sat down on the couch. Daria frowned when she saw that Helen was reading Quinn's book.
After a moment Daria spoke, "You know the neighbors can see you reading through the windows."
"I wanted to see what your sister's so excited about," Helen offered as an excuse.
"Why?' Daria questioned harshly.
"Oh, Daria, must you be so quick to judge?" Helen sighed wearily.
"You're reading a book about a cat with wings," Daria said pointedly.
"All right, some of the stories are a little far-fetched," Helen conceded.
"Carrying an amputated animal foot for good luck is far-fetched," Daria said, "Celestial middle-managers changing the course of human events is ludicrous."
"Okay, guardian angels aren't for you, obviously, but what's the harm in Quinn thinking someone special is looking out for her," she reasoned.
"Like a heavenly personal shopper?" Daria said sardonically.
Helen gave Daria a concerned look, "Daria, why does this bother you so much?" she asked.
Daria wasn't going to answer, but was glad that she was given a reason not to anyway when she and Helen heard Quinn scream from upstairs.
"Someone just mixed spring and fall fashions," Daria remarked.
Quinn rushed downstairs, carrying a pair of jeans with black gunk all over it. She saw Helen and hurried over to her.
"Mom, Mom, I took my jeans out of the laundry and they have black stuff all over them!" Quinn cried, "How could this happen?"
Jake came into the living room, oblivious to the commotion, "Has anyone seen my electrical tape?" he asked.
Daria smirked, "I think your guardian angel forgot to check Dad's pants pocket."
"Why? Why would my angel just desert me like this?" Quinn moaned dejectedly.
"Maybe the next book you should read should be When Mildly Inconvenient Things Happen to Shallow People," Daria teased.
Jake walked over to Quinn and took the pants from her to examine, "Aw, you can still wear these, there's only a couple of stains," he said trying to downplay the damage.
"Dad, I'm not Daria," Quinn reprimanded scandalized.
"Jake, why don't you tell her you'll replace the jeans, since you're the one that ruined them," Helen said exasperated.
Jake, defeated, pulled out his wallet and handed Quinn a twenty. "All right, here," he said.
"You can't buy pants for twenty dollars," Quinn complained.
Jake sighed and handed her another twenty.
Daria looked at Jake and Quinn and realized the opportunity placed before her. "Hey, why can't I get money for new jeans?" she said.
"You don't wear jeans," Quinn said irritated.
"Well, then I need money so I can bribe a dead guy to be my guardian angel," Daria said mock seriously.
Helen shook her head, frustrated, "Jake, give them each fifty and don't negotiate," she said.
Jake grumbled and gave the two money.
Quinn looked relieved, "So, there was a reason for this after all," she said pleased, and then looked up, "Thank you," she said and headed back to her room.
Daria held the money and became contemplative. She sighed, and looked up too, "There's no commission involved here, is there?" she said.
Reprimanding herself and feeling foolish, she pocketed the money and headed up to her room.
Daria and Jane passed by the guardhouse on the Taylor's property and continued up the path. Daria wasn't looking forward to the party, but she was just happy to be in Jane's company. She was just sorry that they had to appear like the best friends they were assumed to be.
"So, you and Tom talking yet?" Daria asked awkwardly.
"Sort of. He wanted to come tonight, but I told him it was just you and me and that we were only going to stay a little while anyway," Jane said nonchalantly.
Daria looked at her, "Did you tell him why it's just you and me?" she asked.
Jane gave her an uncomfortable look, "No. Not yet. I mean, I plan to, but, at the moment, it just seems irrelevant," she said.
"Why?" Daria asked.
"I don't know. I'll deal with it; promise," Jane said and then looked at Daria curiously. She smiled amused. "You're afraid I might want to get back with him, aren't you?"
"No, I'm not," Daria grumbled, but hated that it was true. She was a bit concerned with Jane and Tom's friendship.
"Awww, you're so cute when you're jealous," Jane cooed teasingly.
"Shut up," Daria snapped, blushing intensely.
Jane stopped Daria and faced her, "Hey, you have nothing to worry about. I'm over him and I have absolutely no desire to be with him," she said sincerely.
Daria nodded, "But what if he wants to get back together with you?" she asked.
Jane shrugged, "Then I'll tell him, but at the moment, he's not mentioned that at all," she said and they resumed walking, "So what's going on with Quinn at home?" she asked.
Daria sighed frustrated, "Same old stuff. Her angel got me and her money from our dad by destroying her good jeans," she said.
Jane raised an eyebrow, "You?" she asked curiously.
"I mean, Quinn had a big blow up about her jeans being ruined and her angel abandoning her, so, dad gave her money to replace them and I took advantage," Daria clarified
Jane smirked, "Oh. You had me worried," she said.
"Also, my once rational mother is telling me I should respect Quinn's beliefs," Daria said slightly annoyed.
"Mmm, I suppose the Earth could be flat," Jane said.
"Even that would make more sense. I mean, watch the bloodshed on the evening news and then tell me there are guardian angels," Daria said vehemently.
"Well, someone's keeping those dictators in combat boots," Jane commented lightly.
"Oh, come on," Daria scowled.
Jane sighed and looked at Daria apologetically, "You know what I think is bothering you," she said.
"Oh, really? Enlighten me, doctor," Daria challenged.
"Forgive me, as I know this will cut off some serious necking time," Jane smiled.
Daria rolled her eyes, "I bet it could; continue," she said.
"I think you're afraid it's true; that the Quinns of the world fit in so well because something really is looking out for them, that everything's been decided, they win, you lose, and whatever you do doesn't matter because the end is fixed, so why bother?" Jane said slightly irritated, and then became somber at realizing what she had just said, "God, I'm depressed," she said and stopped walking.
Daria stopped with her, amusement coming over her, "You're right. We'd better call it a night," she said turning around and started walking back down the driveway.
Jane stopped her, went behind her, grabbed her shoulders, and pushed her back towards the house, "Keep moving, Morgendorffer," she said sternly.
"I was almost free," Daria sighed melodramatically.
"No you weren't," Jane smiled, "…So am I out on the necking thing?" she asked tentatively.
"Oh, yeah. Big time," Daria said seriously, but had a hard time concealing a small smile.
Jane noticed the smile. "Damn," she swore, amused.
They entered the house and it was already filled with students from Lawndale.
"Hmm," Daria said, "I wonder how many really know Brittany?" she said looking around.
Jane looked, too, "Not many, I bet."
They saw that most of the students crowded around a makeshift stage. Mystik Spiral was already set up and readying to play.
Daria and Jane stayed near the back, by the wall, hoping they would go unnoticed.
"So, did Spiral come up with anything new and good?" Daria asked, standing close to Jane, trying not to look like they were a couple.
"New, yes; good…well, you've heard them before," Jane shrugged.
Daria smirked.
Jane pointed at the stage when Trent came up to the mike, "Hey, we're Mystik Spiral, and we're here to honor," Trent said and looked at a card, "Brittany Taylor, 'cause every dog has his day!" he said and the band started playing.
"What'd they call me?" Jane and Daria heard Brittany squeak insulted.
They were amused when they saw Jodie try to explain.
The two turned back to Trent when he started singing.
"You put me on a short leash, and threw away my hydrant. You ate up all my kibble, now my coat's no longer vibrant. My nose is dry and chapped, but this puppy's here to stay. Scratch my belly baby, every dog has his day," he sang and the rest of the band members started barking and howling like dogs.
Everyone was getting into the music, or at least trying to. Jane pulled Daria subtly closer to her. She hid her arm under Daria's jacket so no one would know that she was embracing her.
"So what did you think?" Jane said into her ear, when the song finished.
"It was new all right," Daria said.
Jane chuckled, "And I had to listen to that for a while," she lightly complained.
"Oh, you poor thing," Daria teased.
Jane rolled her eyes and then spotted Upchuck coming to Ashley-Amber, who was standing near them. Jane moved back from Daria slightly.
"Oh. How sad, he thinks he's got a chance," Jane said, amused.
Daria smirked, "He always thinks he has a chance. Let's watch him crash and burn."
"Too bad I didn't grab some chips," Jane said trying to pay attention over the music.
Upchuck approached Ashley-Amber, who was completely unaware of him.
"I don't believe I've seen your fair figure gracing the halls of Lawndale High," Upchuck purred.
Ashley-Amber looked at him surprised, "Oh, I don't go to your school. I'm…," she started but Upchuck interrupted her.
"Ah, then allow me to introduce myself; Charles Ruttheimer the Third," he said proudly.
"I'm Ashley-Amber," was all she said, looking at him confused.
"And may I be the first to put the legend of my amorous exploits to rest? I'm actually quite sensitive to the secret most stirrings of your heart," he said flirtatiously.
"I'm Brittany's stepmom," Ashley-Amber stated.
Upchuck looked at her astonished, "Stepmom!" he said, and then started speaking to himself.
Daria and Jane couldn't hear what Upchuck was muttering, but were amused when Ashley-Amber wandered off without him knowing. After a moment, Upchuck looked up and was about to speak, but Ashley-Amber had already gone. He looked around confused and then left the room.
Jane was laughing.
"You can always count on him for a laugh," Daria said amused.
"Yeah, you can," Jane said, "So…," she said.
"Ready to go?" Daria asked.
"Hmm, not yet," Jane said looking around and was about to speak, but stopped when Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie stopped by them.
"Do you think that guardian angel dude is here?" Jeffy asked.
"Of course he is. Look around for an old guy," Joey said looking around.
Jamie and Jeffy did, too.
"There he is!" Jamie said suddenly pointing towards the front door.
Jane and Daria couldn't help themselves; they looked, too, and were confused when they saw Mr. O'Neill.
"Dude, that's Mr. O'Neill," Jeffy said sounding confused.
"Don't you get it? They take human form when they come to Earth," Joey explained.
"I thought it was demons who do that." Jamie said unsure.
"No, that's aliens, doofus." Jeffy reprimanded.
"Come on, we gotta keep him away from Quinn," Joey said leading the other two towards Mr. O'Neill.
Jane and Daria shared a look.
"I don't think I want to ask or know," Jane said bemused.
"Good, 'cause I wasn't that interested," Daria said, annoyed at the mention of Quinn's angel.
"Hey, remember when we were here last time?" Jane asked.
"Yeah, didn't want to be there then just like now," Daria said casually, looking around the room at the people, "Why bring that up?" she asked intrigued.
"It had its moments, Esmeralda," Jane smiled.
Daria looked at her confused, and then smirked, "Forgot about that. Too bad Upchuck learned who I really was," she said.
"Yeah, remember that lame tour he gave us," Jane said casually.
Daria looked at her curiously, "Yeah. Why? What's with the trip down memory lane?" she asked.
"You remember that laundry room?" Jane said cryptically.
"Um, yeah, the one you went in with Bobby Bighead?" Daria said smirking.
"Yeah, well, not him so much," Jane said, "But I don't know, I was thinking of checking it out, you know, see if it's changed much since then," she said indifferently.
Daria smirked, "Uh-huh. By yourself, or have you spotted Bobby Bighead?" she said and pretended to look around.
"I haven't seen that lump, but I could use the company. You know, make sure I don't get lost or something," Jane said pointedly.
"Or lose a sock," Daria added.
"Exactly," Jane said hopeful, "So…?"
Daria looked around. Everyone was into the music and in their own little worlds. No one would notice if they went in there together.
"Sure," Daria said feeling bold.
"Cool, I'll lead the way," Jane said, "If I remember where it is," she said looking around.
"Want to get Upchuck to give us the tour again?" Daria teased.
"Ugh, talk about killing the mood, Daria," Jane said disgusted, "Now you owe me," she said heading for the laundry room.
"I'll think of something," Daria said about to follow, but she saw Ashley-Amber heading their way, "Hey, wait," she said grabbing Jane's arm to stop her.
Jane turned and noticed Brittany's stepmom. They leant against the wall, trying to act as if they weren't doing anything.
"Gee, I don't remember seeing you guys before," Ashley-Amber said scrutinizing them, "Are you friends of Brittany?"
"Brittany?" Jane questioned.
"You know, the person for whom this party is for," Ashley-Amber stated.
"Party?" Daria said and shared an amused look with Jane.
"Yes, party, for Brittany, because she's become an honor student," Ashley-Amber said confused at their behavior.
"Brittany?" Jane said, truly confused.
Ashley-Amber shrugged and walked off.
"Good. Now let's go before someone catches on to us," Jane said, pulling Daria with her.
They made it to the laundry room, but before they entered, Trent announced that Mr. Taylor wanted to speak.
Daria turned to look. "Oh, hey, Brittany's getting her prize or whatever," she said seeing Mr. Taylor step on stage with a small blue box.
Jane dragged her into the room and closed the door.
"You mean you'd choose to look at some mystery thing, instead of being with me?" Jane said affronted.
"It's a mystery. You know me and my curiosity," Daria shrugged.
Jane rolled her eyes, and then pushed Daria against the door and pressed her lips to Daria's. Jane was glad that Daria didn't stop her this time. Daria cupped Jane's face and kissed her back passionately.
Jane liked Daria this way and regretted that they didn't get to do this often.
They had only been kissing for less then a couple minutes when a loud noise interrupted them.
Jane pulled back from Daria. "What the hell is that?" she asked annoyed.
"I have no idea," Daria said, and then they heard the shattering of glass and then yelling from Mr. Taylor.
Jane opened the door slightly and quietly; she and Daria peeked out.
Mr. Taylor was on the stage that the band was on earlier picking at pieces of glass on the floor and glaring at Quinn. Quinn was standing near the soundboard for the Spirals instruments with everyone's attention on her. She looked aghast.
"Sorry, I'll buy a new one," Quinn finally said to the glaring crowd, "I promise."
"Some guardian angel," Sandi said loudly, and obviously pleased, "He didn't even stop you from destroying that…item," she said.
Quinn looked devastated, "I…I, oooh, where's my angel?" She looked at the crowd, and then at Sandi, who was smirking at her. She then ran off crying.
Daria looked at Jane, "Guess now isn't the best time to break the news about the Tooth Fairy," she quipped, but found that she didn't find the situation as funny as she thought she would.
Jane sighed, "Ready to go home?" she asked.
"I was ready to go before we got here," Daria said.
Jane gave her a small smile and they inconspicuously left the laundry room and then the Taylor property.
Daria came out of her room. She was still thinking about the party from the night before. It had been interesting, but she was mostly thinking about Quinn. She looked in Quinn's room, but she wasn't there.
Daria went downstairs and saw that Quinn was moping on the couch with the TV on, but she wasn't paying attention. Daria walked over to her and stared at the TV.
"But aesthetics alone don't account for the silo's round shape, you see, if…," the announcer said before Daria muted it.
"Um, Quinn, you're watching an educational program," Daria said.
"Mm, what's the difference," Quinn said indifferently, "My angels gone," she said miserably.
"Maybe he's just stuck in the engine of a jumbo jet," Daria quipped.
"Right. You know, I know that guardian angels sound like a dumb idea, but once I started to believe in them, it felt really nice," Quinn said, "Like there was someone put here just to do things for me."
"You mean besides the entire male population of Lawndale High," Daria said rolling her eyes.
"It's not the same thing," Quinn said, and then looked at Daria seriously, "Daria, you're smart, right?"
"Well, I'm no Brittany Taylor, but the occasional electric impulse does shoot through my brain," Daria said, unsure of where this conversation was going.
"If there are no guardian angels, what do you believe in?" Quinn asked.
Daria took a minute before she spoke, "I guess I believe in treating people the way you'd want to be treated."
"But, there's nothing watching over us? Nothing keeping track?" Quinn said dejected.
"Well, there's the IRS and those guys with the black helicopters," Daria said, but stopped when Quinn glared at her. She sighed, "Quinn, until I see some pretty convincing evidence to the contrary, I think we're on our own."
"But, but, that's so sad," Quinn said depressed.
Daria decided to change tactic, "Um, then again, I don't have any proof that there isn't something out there," she said, hating that she was actually trying to cheer up Quinn.
"But what about the bullhorn?" Quinn said miserably.
"Maybe the angel didn't think saving an overpriced, undeserved knickknack was the most efficient use of his time." Daria suggested.
Quinn's mood seemed to lighten considerably, "Yeah! Maybe angels only get involved with really big stuff. He was probably playing his string thing when the bullhorn broke and didn't even hear it. That makes sense, right?" she said hopeful.
"I think what makes sense is to believe whatever makes you feel best," Daria said honestly.
"You know what? I'm gonna stop relying on my angel so much for little things and let him do his important stuff and just know that if I need him for anything really critical, like a complexion crisis or an unanticipated weight gain, he'll be there." Quinn said in a greatly better mood, "Thanks, Daria," she said sincerely and headed up to her room.
"Don't mention it," Daria said, surprised at her actions.
"Quinn seems to be doing better," Helen observed as she came down the stairs.
"Don't blame me, I tried to make her cry," Daria said quickly.
"I think it's very sweet when someone puts aside her own strong feelings just to comfort someone else," Helen said obviously having witnessed the whole conversation.
Daria, however, was going to play oblivious, "Sweet? Officer, you've got the wrong guy," she said seriously.
Helen smirked, "Okay, Daria, whatever makes you feel best," she said.
Daria was putting her stuff into her locker. Jane was with her as usual.
"So, you have fun this weekend?" Jane asked, leaning against the locker next to Daria's, huge grin on her face.
Daria looked at her, "Are we talking about something in particular or overall?" she asked, smirking.
"Well, I had fun in the area I'm specifying," Jane said still grinning, "We should do laundry more often, even though it was less then a few minutes," she said.
Daria rolled her eyes, but then gave Jane a mischievous grin, "Well, I have a laundry room, too, you know, and I have a lot of laundry to do this week," she said suggestively.
"Oh, so I'd assume you'd need help," Jane said smiling.
"Yeah, especially since Quinn will be out more now that she's on good terms with the Fashion Drones, and mom and dad have taken on more work," Daria said casually.
"Cool, I'll be over to help you, then," Jane said.
Daria looked at her and then realized the conversation they had just had. Jane seemed to have as well. She was trying to suppress a laugh. Daria then rolled her eyes and Jane laughed aloud.
"God, we are so lame," Daria said, grabbing a couple of books, but still held a grin.
"And weird. And what were you telling me before about being perverse," Jane teased.
Daria shrugged and then saw Quinn and her group coming their way.
Quinn laughed, "I said 'buster', can you imagine," she said and continued walking without giving Daria and Jane a second glance.
Daria watched her, "I need to change my locker," she muttered, closing her locker.
Jane nodded, "I agree. It would save me on a lot of your moods," she said.
Daria glared at her, "You know some of my moods are actually directed at you, right?" she said.
"Yeah, but so are the ones that everyone else puts you in," Jane smirked.
"I hate you," Daria said half-heartedly.
They started for Mrs. Barch's class.
"So Little Miss Spiritual Crisis seems to have recovered from losing her angel," Jane said after noticing that Quinn didn't seem so upset anymore.
Daria sighed, "Yeah, I knew her suffering wouldn't last," she said.
"The good times never do," Jane smiled.
Daria gave her a small smile, "Well, at least we got to see a grown man try to make a bullhorn from a pile of broken glass."
"And, I got to meet Amber-Ashley," Jane said, "Don't know why that matters," she said baffled.
"You mean Ashley-Amber," Daria corrected, "And I don't either, dealing with Brittany is enough."
"Right, how is it that she looks and acts exactly the same age as her own stepdaughter?" Jane asked amused.
"There are some mysteries that are just beyond our knowledge," Daria said, smirking.