Yeah, I know, I took wwaaayyy too long updating and I didn't even give you 20 pages. Naughty me :) Ok, now that my life has gotten into a regular routine after all the after-school stuff going on, I think I'll be able to udate at least four more chapters this summer. But don't get too excited, I could do just two more, who knows.
And now I really am going to introduce my next announcer, the ever estimable Boromir!
Boromir: You have got to be joking!
No. I'm not. Now hurry up before I let that crazy drunken woodelf get at you for writing all those gross stories about him!
Boromir: What stories? What are you talking about? Legolas, go away, I don't know what she's talking about! DOWN BOY! This-authoress-doesn't-own-anything-except-Rhov-and-Kelly!
Thankyou Boromir. Now was that so hard?
Needless to say, the next morning I was extremely embarrassed to the point where I sure as heck was not putting my face out my door until I was sure everyone was gone to breakfast. Unfortunately, I figured without the determination of Arwen who came and fetched me two hours after daybreak so that I could be breaking my fast with all and sundry I had not seen since the Council three days ago.
"No, really," I protested to the relentless Arwen who was following behind me to make sure I couldn't run for it, "I'm not hungry in any way, shape or form. A headache, a really bad headache. I got it this morning and it won't go away until I can stay quiet for a day or five."
Smiling, Arwen merely shook her head at my weak and unfruitful protestations and chivvied me along the halls, through doorways, and finally into the small, private room in which the family and friends of Elrond ate together. Don't get me wrong, they eat with everyone else most of the time but, after all, social interaction gets a little old after a while.
To my everlasting chagrin, all who had witnessed my strange afternoon were present and accounted for. Was it just me or was that what Arwen had in mind in getting my little behind out of my bed this morning. Maybe my chronic shyness would wear off with all this public humiliation. So, deciding to be as dignified as possible, I straightened my back, lifted my chin, and marched into the room, ascertaining which seats were empty and farthest away from anybody. To my great displeasure, the only seat besides Arwen that was empty was right next, and I mean next, to Elladan with Legolas on the other side. Rhov was exactly across from that awful chair of doom.
All looked up and smiled serenely in that horribly eerie elvish way that makes one wonder how such other-wordly beings came to be on this… whatever it is. My hands suddenly became cold and clammy but I merely stuck them in the folds of my dress and swept to my chair that was held by dear Halbarad. He was the only one (again!) whom I could take comfort from as we were the only two humans in this pack of non-earthly things. Smiling encouragingly my way, he helped me into the chair and then slid it forward to the table's edge like a true gentleman. It gratified me, I'm sorry to say, to see Rhov's eyebrows contract slightly. Why in the world was I delighted every time I seemed to miff the very person I should not be miffing?
"I am glad to see you have recovered from your shock." Elrond said in what I could assume was a kindly manner.
"Shock?" I choked innocently. "Oh no, it wasn't shock, I just happen to be in that time of month and my nerves and emotions are all screwed up so don't take it personally." Now why had I gone and spit THAT out? To my relief, the only person who seemed to have even a glimmer of realization was Halbarad who, I'm very sure, has had experience with that sort of... thing. I have no idea if Elves... yeah, ok, I'm digressing: badly.
"You have a certain time of month when you are... upset?" Elrond asked, slightly taken aback.
"Oh yes." I replied cheerfully. "All females, eh, at least human ones, have this same thing. I won't explain it to you and be glad; I'm saving you all from TMI."
With one accord Legolas and Elladan's eyebrows shot up while everyone else merely looked puzzled. Both of my resident elves had experienced TMI from me before and knew that whatever I declared "TMI" was definitely to be kept to myself without exception.
I noticed Rhov's mouth opening but Legolas cut him off with a overly loud, "Elrohir, you said you finished your bow yesterday. I'd be interested in seeing it after breakfast."
The coversation switched accordingly to weaponery then to the different aspects of preparing for the mission, then to the journey itself. I said nothing the whole time and merely filled my raging stomach with the excellent fruit and what passed for Middle-Earth pancakes and no, it wasn't lembas. I hate lembas. So boring.
I had just finished scraping my plate clean and was preparing to make a quiet exit when Halbarad interrupted Elrond's hysterically solemn cautions about the Misty Mountain passes. "Adlanniel, perhaps you would like to learn a little archery?"
I stared open-mouthed at the man until his innocent look changed to one of perplexion. Finally, I was able to blab out, "Why?"
Gasping out a very unmanlike "ummm", Halbarad's face became the rich red of Arwen's lips and his head slumped down to stare at his plate. Legolas piped up right then to save the poor fellow from unnecessary embarassment. "She's only asking because none of us ever dared put anything even resembling a weapon in her hands before."
"Unforgivable paranoia, really." I said and then I stood up. "I would be delighted to take you up on your offer, Halbarad. I shall be in the music room whenever you're ready." With what I hoped was a graceful toss of my plain brown hair, I turned and walked swiftly out the door and down the hall to my bedroom to braid my hair.
When I was actually on my own planet, world, time zone, whatever, I had taken piano lessons from some old lady who decided I had some musical talent. She taught me to play the harp, the big one actually, and I did ok. I only remember a few and I enjoyed going to the music room in Rivendell where a couple harps, flutes, and stuff I didn't even bother trying to put a name to were kept for whoever wanted to play them.
Having washed my hands earlier, I rubbed them together as I sat down on a stool behind the smaller harp to warm them up. To my consternation, just as I began twiddling with the strings just to warm up, Rhov and Legolas appeared at the doorway. Both wore expressions of decided incredulity.
Rhov sat down on one of the four steps that led down into the room and shook his head. "Is that the music your people play?"
"No! I'm just warming up that's all." I snapped. Hey, I may have a crush on the guy but any dolt could see I was just plucking random strings.
"Warming up?"
"Yes." I sighed. No doubt an elf could plop down and plink out the Rachmaninoff Prelude, Op. 3, No. 2 no problem. I have no doubt that they are excellent sight readers. "I'm just getting my fingers used to the harp strings and also limbering them."
"I see." Rhov said. I watched him and Legolas out of the corner of my eye and realized they showed no intention of leaving. Apparently they were both prepared to hear something thoroughly strange and delightfully horrid. I had no intention of satiating their perverted curiosity and promptly began to thrum out "Greensleeves".
Coming to a small pause, I sneaked a look in their direction and saw Legolas' eyes were closed and he looked bored (considering that's all I ever played in Mirkwood) and a tiny bit dissappointed. Rhov was watching me very carefully and I do believe he was enjoying the tune.
When I finished, Rhov leaned back against the stair and said, "Beautiful, simple, yet beautiful. Did you write it?" Legolas merely opened his eyes and stared down at Rhov like the black-haired elf was in desperate need of physciatric counseling.
"Eh, no." I muttered. "Tell you what, I will play a Beethoven just for Legolas since he needs to hear something new." I began playing Fur Elise with a couple flourishes of my own. I liked adding stuff to whatever I played, which, of course, drove my poor teacher to distraction and the local shrink. But that was also because her son had gone and married a Las Vegas showgirl and her daughter refused to babysit my teacher's chihuahua. In honesty, I can understand not being to happy about the showgirl but jeez, just because your daughter is worried about her allergies? Sorry, digressing...
Finishing the slightly altered version of Fur Elise, I noticed that Legolas and Rhov had been joined by Halbarad who was staring at the harp with a completely unreadable look. I jumped up, refusing to look at Rhov. "I'm ready to go and twang a few strings!"
I heard Legolas groan. Turning I stuck my tongue out at the faking dramatic elf then, of all things, waved goodbye to the now-standing Rhov. He grinned and my heart stopped beating for a second. Wow... I'm serious, all guys should have a little dimple when they grin.
Halbarad had just taken my arm when Rhov suddenly decided something because his grin vanished within his huge smile as he bounded up and took my other arm.
"As Halbarad's protector I had better go along with you two to make sure Adlanniel doesn't kill anyone."
"Ha, ha." I murmured as Legolas brought up the rear of our strange quartet and we moved out of the music room and towards the outside. I noticed my Caucasian skin looked suddenly very, very white against Rhov's dark brown and Halbarad's leather colored skin. Boy, if Rhov and I ever had kids they would such a pretty coffee color...
I hate my brain. It really shouldn't think things like that.
We reached the archery field without incident and Halbarad and Rhov dropped my arms with alacrity and began to string their bows (Rhov had left his here yesterday), check the tension, and several other things that I, as a newbie, didn't recognized at all. Finally they seemed to have their bows ready and I could see Legolas looking once more at Rhov with that strange, observing look that was usually held for fools and idiots.
Humph. It wasn't as if I was going to purposefully point my arrow in the direction of one of them. Twiddling my thumbs, I sat down on the grass as Rhov and Halbarad tried a few practices shots that all went sickeningly dead center. Without realizing it, I began to idly rip grass up, play with it, then toss it and reach for another clump. Legolas winced every time the ripping sound reached his delicate ears but the other two seemed to engrossed in their archery. Legolas doesn't understand my basic human instinct to rip up grass, he thinks it's a little disturbing.
I was just getting Legolas to his certain line of toleration when things start getting fun when Halbarad stopped shooting and turned to me. "Would you like a try now, my lady."
Smirking over at the glaring Legolas, I brushed off my hands and turned toward Halbarad. With a grin, I nodded and reached for his bow that he was holding out. I heard Legolas shift behind me and knew that he had taken refuge behind Rhov. I couldn't understand why that stupid elf believed me to be such a dreadful menace when it came to weaponry since I had never even been given a dagger to play with. Of course it could be my attitude toward weapons that made him a little nervous; after all, one isn't supposed to "play" with daggers.
"Adlanniel," Halbarad said with a smile, "you're holding the bow upside down."
"Heh, so I am." I said. Halbarad then began going over the bow with me pointing out where I was to notch my arrow, where my fingers needed to be, how to pull my elbow back, how not to snap the string against my elbow, essentially the basics.
Rhov and Legolas stood back, now and then adding a little something here or there. Finally I was ready to notch my first arrow and try to "shoot it in the general direction of the target," as Legolas put it.
You know how in movies whenever the girl is learning to shoot a gun or an arrow the guy always stands behind her and then they end up kissing? Well none of the three gallants did that and I decided it must be a purely Earthian thing. A little nervous I lifted the bow and pulled the string back. I pulled air into my lungs and let it out slowly as I released the string as Halbarad had directed. The arrow made a halfhearted leap and landed about 20 feet from where we were standing. I heard muffled wheezes, groans, and choking as the three (headed by Legolas) made a concerted effort to not laugh outloud.
I guess I should have been embarrassed but Mom said I had never had anything resembling basic human pride when it came to learning something new. Sure I blush at about everything except when I'm learning something. Then I don't care as long as someone shows me what I did wrong.
It was Rhov this time who came over and began to explain everything all over again. Granted, it was annoying hearing the same thing again but I decided to grit my teeth and just listen again. Maybe this was the way they learned.
Finishing up, Rhov walked back a couple steps and I could feel three pairs of eyes on me as I raised my upper body, pulled the string back, thought about everything Rhov and Halbarad had said, let out a soft breath and let the string go. The arrow actually went a decent distance this time, sure it didn't hit the target but it was only about 10 feet away from it.
"Not bad, really." Legolas said nonchalantly behind my back. "For a first time."
Glancing back, I noticed that Legolas was no longer taking refuge behind Rhov but was standing in the open like any respectable elf his age instead of acting like the kids I used to babysit. "Thanks. Actually if someone would show me how to stand correctly and where my elbows should be I would appreciate it."
They looked at each other and then Rhov and I both realized that Halbarad and Legolas were staring not at each other but at Rhov; quite pointedly actually.
"Oh fine!" Rhov snorted and the other two grinned. "I need not remind you, Halbarad, that this was your idea in the first place."
Well, I was feeling quite flattered by Rhov's eagerness and began to become very businesslike. Any ideas of romantic goings-on faded as I looked at Halbarad and Legolas' snickering smirks. I would show them I could fire an arrow with some modicum of dignity even with an extremely handsome elf helping me!
However, all my good, noble, business-like intentions went out the window when Rhov stepped up behind me, put his arms around me, and began pushing my hands into place on the slack bow. Only when I imagined Orlando Bloom as the actual one framing me was I able to get nauseous enough to concentrate. With Rhov holding my elbows in place, I pulled the string back a third time, went through all my moves and to my everlasting delight, the arrow sunk its shaft into the target. Albeit it didn't even touch the colored part, I felt I had reached a hill in my archery.
Rhov back up and clapped my shoulder with a manly gesture. "Well done, Adlanniel. Perhaps we will make an archer out of you yet."
Oh, gee thanks. "Thanks to you and Halbarad not to old squeamy over there."
Legolas stuck his tongue out at me in a very Earthian human way that was quite disgusting for someone of his ethnicity. I'm serious, some guys look quite cute when they stick their tongues out but elves…? I don't think even Rhov could pull that off.
A yell from behind us made us all look. Pippin was flying down the small slope that led up to the house and his curly hair shone in the bright autumn sunlight. Right then I knew that hobbits were perhaps the most familiar things to my former reality and I loved them. Gee, no wonder we all sort of protected the brave, resourceful, definitely scary when-made-mad hobbits.
"Quick, quick, Elrond needs all of you!" Pippin yelled again, then he reached us. Almost without stopping he swerved around Rhov and grabbed my hand then wrenched me toward the Last Homely House leaving the other three to run after us. Another thing about hobbits: they are very strong.
As I was hauled along behind the young hobbit, I managed to gasp out. "What in the world is going on, Pippin?"
"I have no idea! Elrond just looked like he'd swallowed a cat and couldn't get it out!"
I blinked and decided I was very confused.