I've been asked what ships I'm aiming at. The story is starting to let me know. Thank you all for the reviews.
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By the time Tuesday came, Jade was ready to work, if nothing else than to have something to focus on. She showed up that morning, determined to put in a full day. She intended to make a breakthrough on her own theories, and soon. It would help her career and it would keep her mind off her troubles. Beck was gone, and Jade found she was using Tori's father to help her feel safe enough to stand on her own. It was disturbing, feeling vulnerable every time she left her house. She was a Black Belt, and yet felt so afraid. Still, Jade was sure it would get better. The worst part was it showed how much she depended on Beck to feel safe. Losing him had hurt her confidence at a time when the twelve year old Jade was emerging; hurt, scared, and damaged. Jade had to heal that on her own. That is if her friends would let her.
Work had it's own brand of crazy going on. Doctor Kripke and Doctor Cooper had a long standing rivalry that was held in check more by their inability to actually do anything to each other than by Caltech's rules. Their status was best described as frenimy. The shared a social group but didn't get along, since both were self centered and arrogant. Jade had made a decision to avoid being a pawn in that conflict, and after Barry Kripke succeeded in gaining her respect, she decided the best course of action was to be friendly to both sides. 'Well, as friendly as I get.' she thought. She knew if she decided, she could make this a three way conflict that would leave the department battered and scarred.
Ignoring the ongoing feud, Jade quickly found that she had to respect each persons workspace, including her other would be friends. Apparently she couldn't just barge in on Lenard or Howard, since they had their own work to do. Still, a couple of dynamics were developing. The interactions she was having with her coworkers would effect how she enjoyed her time at Caltech.
She and Howard had quickly created a game where they would say something to each other in a different language each time they saw each other. Jade eliminated Klingon early with a few well placed threats. Howard eliminated Sioux by complaining that he should be allowed to use Klingon if she could use an equally obscure language. Otherwise they each spoke enough languages to usually figure out anything the other said. The only other rule was keep it clean, since Howard wanted to return to Bernadette relatively whole. 'Promising to make him relive his circumcision was probably not my best threat' Jade thought. 'Boys...Men can be so sensitive about that area.' The thought caused her to smile.
Despite everything she was doing to distract herself, Jade was getting agitated as lunch approached. To ease her tension, she called a graduate student she knew from UCLA to come have lunch with her. He was a friend who was studying to be a therapist, and she was suddenly interested in learning more. While he could not personally be her therapist (Conflict of interests, he was already her friend) he did recommend some people who she could talk to. She promised to look into it, then asked about his research. He was studying the limits of Hypnotherapy. While fairly limited in what it could do to treat mental illness, it had areas where it's applications were extremely useful. Jade decided on an experiment. She then called Raj.
Jade and her friend looked at Raj's problems talking to women, noting that he could talk to his female relatives and to women in general if he even thought he was drunk. Then as an experiment and to prove a theory, she had her friend put Raj under. He was then given a suggestion straight to his subconscious to regard Jade as 'Like a sister'. At the time it looked like a harmless enough bit of amusement. The whole thing took less than half an hour, and by one thirty she was off to her next project. Jade was looking for the classrooms she would be using to teach her classes. The classes would start next week, and like a good actress she wanted to walk her stage first.
She got a call fro Raj, checking in on how she was doing. They talked for a short bit, but the real test would be a face to face conversation. Jade decided to drop by his office towards the end of her day. She then called Tori to see how she was doing. Tori was visiting Beck, so the call was quick. Both were doing Okay, but Beck was a wreck. He was moping around, and they were just helping out. Someone had recommended helping him clean his trailer, and that was the mornings activity. Based on the condition it was in and Becks mindset, she was hoping to be done by evening. It was clear that Beck was hurting. Jade felt guilty. 'He could have stayed with me.' She was sure he was worse off then her because he was right, he was the one who loved more.
Raj was waiting for her at her office, and she regretted her experiment almost instantly. Jade West was now the only female in LA he could talk to sober. He would just not stop talking. He talked about his problems with his rich parents back in India. He complained about haw hard it was to find someone when the only way to talk to them was to get hammered. He talked about the frustrations he had dating different types of damaged girls, and how he must be the least attractive man many of them ever met. He especially complained about how pathetic he felt because Howard, who came across so much worse to women, was now married and he was the odd man out. His rant about how even Sheldon had a girlfriend was particularly bothersome. Jade decided to give his number to both Robbie and Sinjin. 'Let the losers have a support group.' Then it got worse. While talking about the troubles he's had with his sisters dating, Raj became hyper concerned with Jade's breakup. It was bad enough that he sucked at comforting her. Always managing to say the wrong things was almost like a curse for a man who honestly cared. But the worst part was that he seemed intent on making sure her next relationship was up to his standards. Two second after he told her he wanted to personally approve of each of her would be suitors he was physically thrown from her office. Jade was worried that even that extreme act seemed to fit in with his family. She banned him from her space until he learned boundaries. Still, she didn't even think of ending the hypnotic suggestion. She found she liked him more with her being able to hold a conversation with him.
By that point it was after three and Jade decided to make the rounds. Howard was busy with whatever project NASA had for him. She just spoke with him quickly and moved on. Sheldon was letting her be for now, so she decided to avoid him. She liked it with him giving her space. She decided to check on Lenard. He was her favorite, since he was both the most normal and the one with the balls to talk to her when she was crabby. Plus she just liked the little guy.
As she was walking over, Raj called to check on her. He told her he just wanted to make sure she knew she had someone to talk to. He then promised to be there for her. Jade was really beginning to regret helping him, and wondered what women in her life she hated enough to add to his list of girls he could talk to sober.
She dropped by Lenard's lab and found him setting up for one of his experiments. Surprisingly Sinjin was there as well.
"Hi Jade, you look pretty." Sinjin said, alerting everyone that she had arrived.
"What's he doing here?" Jade demanded.
"Summer internship. I'm sharing him with Howard. The boy can run wires like a pro, he can do basic fabrication, and helps us with a lot of our setup work. He's really useful to have around." Lenard was almost gushing. Jade didn't have the time to marvel at the nerd bromance.
"So Jade. Now that we both work here, I was wondering if maybe.." Sinjin was cut off.
"NO!" Jade was loud, clear, and the lanky youth almost wet himself. "Wait, why aren't you helping out with the summer plays?"
"He does plays? What does he do? Acting? Maybe he knows some directors?" Penny was in the room, lost in thought, and Jade hadn't noticed.
"I am. I can do both. I give each project a couple of day. I also hang out with the guys. Burf and I are going to the races this Saturday with Beck." Sinjin replied to Jade. His mentioning Beck should have hurt more, but all Jade felt was happy that Beck had such good friends.
"I'm glad he has you. Sinjin, be nice to him and I'll tell you how to meet a lot of pretty girls. They are a bit skanky, but that's okay." She was smiling. Then she turned to Penny. "Sinjin is the master of the back stage technical stuff. Only Robbie is better at Tech theater, and no one runs the boards like him. Oh and Penny, what the chiz are you doing here?" Her voice raised towards the end.
"I invited her. I wanted her to meet Sinjin, and I thought you might like having a girlfriend to hand out with." Lenard's word choice hit Jade strangely.
'Girlfriend? Do I want a girlfriend? Wait, he meant a friend who is a girl. But..' Jade pushed the thoughts from her mind. She had some damage to do. "That's nice, but I'm not sharing my troubles with your groupie. No offense Penny, but I have a lot of female friends looking to comfort me. I came here to get lost in the science, and in that area you are functionally a..ah.." Jade hesitated to find the words.
"Blond Monkey?" Penny asked, still stinging from when Sheldon had called her that.
"No, monkeys are useful to have around. But I like the thought. A gerbil maybe? Doesn't matter. The point is, I appreciate the concern, but Lenard needs to man up and accept that if I want his help, he can't farm me off to someone else." Jade would have continued, but the sound of breaking glass stopped her. Holding up a finger to ask for a second, she reached for her phone, looked at the caller ID, and groaned. Then she answered the phone. "Raj, I'm doing fine, please don't call me every twenty minutes to ask." Jade then hung up.
"Raj is sure concerned. I guess he...wait a moment. He's talking to you?" Penny did a double take. Raj often had trouble talking to a female on the phone, so face to face was out of the question. It was also unlikely he was drunk at work, so naturally she was confused.
"I found a way to get past his blocks, but now I can't undo it. That boy needs to learn to shut the chiz up before I jank him up." Jade sounded frustrated. She did know how, potentially, but wasn't going to tell anyone.
"Look, Jade, I was wondering, hows that play you were working on? I mean, I know you've had a lot going on, but the sooner we get a final draft, the sooner we can get it cast and start rehearsals. The producer I know is very interested in getting started and I'm hoping that maybe a small lead roll would fit me?" Penny was usually more subtle, but today she was facing a potentially heartbroken Jade. Best to be direct in case the girl was just writing his name over and over again.
"It's coming along, and I don't know if your good enough for the lead. I know a lot of actresses. I have worked with some good ones in the past, and I'm positive I'll find a cast I can trust. When we do auditions, I'll see if there are any parts you fit. Do you do furniture?" Jade smirked at Penny.
"Just trying to help." Penny replied, stinging a little. Jade was just a girl, with maybe an inch in height and a years of unarmed combat training on her, but Penny didn't want to push the potentially volatile girl. Penny looked into her eyes, saw the lingering hurt, as well as the way the lanky boy was silently screaming for her to run for her life, and decided to let the issue rest for now. Later she would impress this girl and get the part.
Lenard spoke up. "So Jade, I was wondering if maybe you'd like to hang out with the guys again. I can send you our schedule and see what interests you. No pressure, it's just we really like you as a friend and we want you to feel like part of the group. Or we could see what you might want to do with individual members. Maybe Penny.." A glare from Jade and a look from Sinjin told the physicist that that was not a good subject."Not penny, but the girls hang out a lot. What do you girls do when you hang out?" Lenard was babbling, but with good intentions.
"We usually just have a few drinks and talk about stuff. You know, girl stuff." Penny said.
"My period will probably start in another week and a half. Girly enough for you." Jade deadpanned.
Both Lenard and Penny looked shocked. That was hardly the sort of thing they ever expected to hear in this lab. Sinjin checked his phone.
"Twelve days if you stay with your usual schedule." Sinjin's statement had an immediate effect on everyone, but outraged Jade, and he quickly realized it was time to run. His rapid escape took him past Alex, who seemed nervous for some reason, and past Sheldon's office.
Jade's pursuit of her sometimes stalked was almost cut short by Alex. "Doctor Cooper would like to see you" the assistant screamed as Jade tore past her at a dead run. Jade stopped when she realized that Sinjin had his escape planned and could have hidden in any of the offices. She entered the one she believed the young man would probably think Jade would not willingly enter, and found herself looking at Sheldon.
"Jade, nice of you to join me." Sheldon said, a smile on his face.
"Where is he. Where is that mop headed freak. I'm gonna kill him." she screamed.
"I'm afraid I'm alone here, unless you count Doctor Amy Farrah Fowler here on video chat. Is there something wrong?" He asked.
"That creepy little loser's been spying on me again. I thought he'd stopped, but he's still doing it." Jade was pacing, noticeably upset.
"Oh my. I assume you saw Doctor Kripke peeking into the ladies room, presumably using some sort of camera?" Sheldon guessed.
"Wrong creepy loser. Sinjin's been spying on me. Wait, he does that?" Jade continued pacing around, looking to figure out where her prey was.
Sheldon turned his computer so Amy could look into the room. "I was just assuming. Sinjin? Really Jade, how could he have placed a camera in the ladies room? He's only been here a couple of days." His comment didn't help.
"He knows my menstrual cycle. How janked up is that. Now he's gonna get janked up." Jade was fuming, angry enough to share when she normally wouldn't.
"He may just notice other things associated with your cycle. You said he used to spy on you? Maybe he noted behavior that came with the cycle and just tracked that?" Amy offered. "I'll admit, it is creepy, but it doesn't require direct spying." before Jade could answer, Sheldon showed his usual tack and started on another topic.
"Jade, I hate to interrupt your planed homicide, but I need to talk to you about something important. Amy and I have been discussing your predicament and feel they you should have greater interaction with a more productive and positive social group. To help facilitate this, we're willing to allow you back into ours. I will email you our usual schedule, and you can join us maybe once or twice a week." Sheldon's usual mix of compassion and arrogance was on full display.
"Why is everyone so intent on me hanging out with you losers? I'm not gonna drag your groups cool factor up." Jade said feeling very on edge. Her frustration at life, her feelings of unease were mixing with her anger.
"We just feel you need more positive role models to best develop you intellectual gifts." Amy said.
"I've been talking with Lenard's mother about your possible problems. She thinks you were coddled too much as a child. I tend to agree." Jades eyes would have left deep wounds if they could. "She wasn't too helpful on how to help you now, claiming she would need to see you professionally and she does not see clients. My mother, who's usual response would be to pray, suggested that you needed a supporting social environment. Some place where you would not be judged." Sheldon finished and Jade just started to lose it. The unintended implications hit hard, and she had been through too much today. She felt violated, vulnerable, and above all angry. The sound of her phone, a call she knew was from Raj, was the last straw. She bolted from the office towards her own. Once there she closed the door, sank to the floor and started to cry. It was too much at once. She fumbled with her phone, calling the one person she could trust to make it right.
"Tori, Oh god Tori, It's just too much. Sinjin knows my menstrual cycle and that Penny girl wants me to write her a play so she can get the lead and god why wont Raj just shut the fuck up. They care, I think, because they all want me to hang out with them on one of their nerd pursuit days and I just can't handle it and Sinjin knows my fucking menstrual cycle." Jade was crying, unsure if she just left a message or if she was speaking to Tori. She didn't even know if she hung up. She sat on the floor in her office for a while until there was a knock on her door.
"Go away Lenard." She shouted, voice cracking.
"Jade, It's Raj. I was just checking to see if you were all right? I know your not, because if you were you wouldn't be crying in your office. You don't have to tell me what's wrong, but please let me in. I think you need a hug."
Jade sat on the floor, feeling overwhelmed for another few minutes, not able to answer. Then she just stopped. Something shifted, the tears were done, and she was feeling stronger. Letting the emotions out had given her the chance to just work through a little of her issues. She had somehow made it through the overflow of emotions, and while she still had a ways to go, she was ready to tackle a few issues.
"Raj, can I take a rain check on that hug? I need to take care of something." Jade shouted through the door. Then she made herself a cup of coffee, and calmly texted Sinjin.
Jade(To Sinjin): If you don't want me to hunt you down like a dog, you will tell me how you knew my menstrual cycle. I still might kill you, but it's your only hope. Call me.
Moments later, she got her call. "Sinjin, I'm not yelling. I'm plotting your disappearance, but not yelling. If you don't want to become a part of shadow creek park, tell me how did you know my monthly cycle?"
"When you're on it you're nicer to everybody, and you tend to be easier to deal with one day out of every twenty eight or so. I then checked you trash to confirm my theory. From there it was just tracking your moods and calculating the days. I'm sorry. I just wanted to know more about you. I would never touch you unless you wanted me to. Do you want me to?" He actually sounded hopeful at the end.
"If we're going to both be working at Caltech this summer, you'd best remember I don't want to date you. Be Becks friend, and maybe I'll forgive you, but give me some space or it will end badly for you. Very badly." Jade growled. She then let the boy go.
After the call, Jade decided to see if she could still get that hug from Raj. If he was going to be like the brother the entire family is embarrassed to admit is related to them, then she was going to get used to being treated like a sister. That meant the occasional hug, and god could she use a hug. 'I just hope I'm not telling stories like Cat.' As she opened the door, there was Tori, preparing to knock. The singer quickly smiled, looking ready to help in any way possible. Jade pulled her into the office.
"Tori, thank you for coming, but I'm actually doing better. It was just overload. In a strange way Sinjin helped me. Overcoming the feelings of violation from knowing how much he knew about me helped me deal with some of my feelings of helplessness. I'm better, really better." Jade smiled at the Latina, and for the first time consciously noticed how pretty she was. A thought from earlier returned. 'Do I need a girlfriend? Or a Girlfriend?' Jade allowed the thought to linger several long seconds, then pushed it away. "come on, I'm owed a hug from Raj, and I mean to collect."
"You're willingly letting someone hug you?" Tori asked.
"Yep. Special situation. It's a long story. Anyways I'm probably going to start doing things with these losers. Not much, just enough to be friends. You wanna be my plus one on Pizza night? Wait, Penny will be there." Jade was happy. She could not explain it, but she was happy. 'Maybe later, Tori can reject me. As long as we can still be friend. Or start being friend'. In Jades thoughts she admitted she was attracted to Tori, and was all right with it. 'Just give myself some time. Tori does not deserve to be a rebound.' Jade didn't have the energy to worry about her thoughts, so she let them run free for a bit.
It would be around bed time when it hit her. 'I'm attracted to Tori! That why she always felt like a threat!' The thought caused Jade to laugh, and then she called Raj. She needed advice, and he was as close to gay as one of her friends got. At least one she would talk to about this. Somehow he was not happy with that statement, or with the late hour of the call, but they still talked about it for half an hour before she went to bed. She gave him the customary threat to tell no one and thanked him for listening, then hung up. She was beginning to like this Raj.
David Vega was surprised and relieved to not get a call from Jade, but made a note to check up on her just to be sure. He knew she was far from done with his family, and wanted a good relationship.
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I hope you've enjoyed this chapter. I was surprised about the nature of Raj and Jade's friendship. It will be interesting to see where this goes.