Title: The Annoyance From Hell
Summary: Naruto gains two bloodlines before his Genin exam. One that lets him know the ultimate pet peeve of any person he looks at and another that makes him the biggest annoyance in the Hidden Countries. As Sarutobi said: poor, poor Kakashi.
Intended Rating: T
Prologue
1234567890
Namikaze Minato looked over at his newborn son in awe and sadness. Kushina had died after complications with childbirth, only living long enough to name him Naruto. And now, he too would be leaving their son, sealing the Kyuubi into him.
He sighed and turned back to the letter he was writing to Sarutobi. It was short but it explained the Kekkei Genkai both he and Kushina might pass onto their son. He smiled sadly and signed it, before sealing it and leaving it on the desk for the old man to find.
As he left for the battlefield, Naruto cradled in his arms, Minato never noticed a breeze come through the open window and blow the letter off the desk. The letter floated down to the floor gently, slipping underneath the desk.
1234567890
Twelve Years Later
1234567890
'Hmm, let's see,' Sarutobi thought. It was two days before the Genin exam, and it was up to him to choose the teams, even though they were unsure of who would be graduating. It was the Chuunin sensei's job to complete the teams if one or more of their members didn't graduate.
'Hmm. Well, Inochi, Shikaku, and Chouza have been bugging me to create another Ino-Shika-Cho trio. And the sensei…Asuma should do quite nicely. We've needed a tracker team for a while, so Kiba, Hinata, and Shino…hmm, a sensei though…ah! Kurenai was recently promoted to Jounin! Perfect. Now…Sasuke…the rookie is always paired with the dead last…(sigh)…Naruto…Sakura's the top in grades under Sasuke, so she'll be placed there too. Perhaps she'll be able to keep the peace. But for the sensei…someone who can help Sasuke with the Sharingan, get Sakura over the fangirl stage, and not see Naruto as the Kyuubi. Ah, yes, Hatake Kakashi.' Satisfied with having thought of three of the teams, he moved to write them down and knocked a stack of paperwork off his desk.
"Oh, damn," Sarutobi cursed, leaning down to pick up the papers. He knelt down to check under the desk. He didn't find any paperwork, but, "Hmm? And what's this?" Sarutobi asked out loud, as he examined the letter in his hand. It was addressed:
'To Old Man Hokage'
Sarutobi's eye twitched at the nickname, but, recognizing the handwriting as Minato's, opened it.
Hey Old Man,
Sorry to stick you back with all the paperwork, but you can consider it payback for not warning me about it. As I'm writing this, the Kyuubi has just passed the northern gate. As you know doubt already know, I plan to seal the damned demon into my son, Naruto.
"Naruto?" Sarutobi asked, surprised.
Yep, that's right. Namikaze Uzumaki Naruto, although I'll be giving you only the Uzumaki part on the battlefield. Can't have too many people knowing the truth…I have far too many enemies.
The reason I'm writing this is because of the Kekkei Genkai that Kushina and I had. Naruto will with any amount of bad luck inherit both.
The only ones who knew I had a Kekkei Genkai were Jiraiya, Kakashi, Rin, Obito, and Kushina. No doubt Jiraiya and Kakashi could tell you how bad mine was. Daimeiwaku. And as the name suggests, the Kekkei Genkai makes the one who has it extremely annoying. I thank Kami every day, that no one ever killed me for it.
Kushina's Kekkei Genkai on the other hand, Kizushiryoku, allowed her to automatically know the pet peeve of anyone she met. As you can tell, with these Kekkei Genkai combined, not only will Naruto be annoying as hell, he will be able to use his annoyance to its fullest ability.
Both bloodlines start showing sometime after the age of seven. Please protect Naruto. I know he'll be annoying as hell, but it's not his fault. It's mine for reproducing.
Do enjoy hell.
With love,
Namikaze Minato
After reading the letter, Sarutobi came to a single conclusion:
"Poor, poor Kakashi."
1234567890
Several blocks away, in his apartment, Naruto was sleeping soundly, dreaming of all the cool missions he would take when he became a Genin.
He never saw the red glow that surrounded him, or heard the malevolent, mischievous chuckle that came from the demon sealed inside him as the fox unlocked both his Kekkei Genkai, insuring (at least in Kyuubi's mind) Konoha's destruction.
The fox had no idea how much it would regret that decision in the years to come.
Secret Of Daimeiwaku: (You don't necessarily have to use this if you don't want to) The Kekkai Genkai doesn't affect anyone that has promised to protect Naruto without knowing about the Kekkai Genkai.
Feel free to adopt this story. If you do, please remember to PM me so I may add your penname below.
Adopted by: No one yet.