Matchmaker Iroh
Jing: JunexMing
"C-C-Captain!?" screamed the young soldier. "There's a giant- a giant, um, thing attacking the men!" He ran back to the sound of scuffling.
Ming rushed to her troop in fear, only to discover they were all lying stiff-as-boards on the ground. The captain rolled her eyes when she saw a Shirshu hiding in the bushes.
A tall, dark haired woman crouched in the clearing, holding out her hands. She tried to coax the large animal back to her with food. "Come out, Nyla! Those mean soldiers aren't going to scare you anymore." She held up a cluster of grapes, "Snuffly-Wuffly, don't worry about them."
From behind her Ming said, "You must be June. And I take it this is your Shirshu?"
The other woman did not turn around, "You must be Captain Ming. And your troop of Firebending idiots."
"I suppose my Firebending idiots were under the impression you could control your little pet," Ming retorted with a sly smile.
June stood up slowly. Her face was unruffled, but her words were sharp.
"Is there something I can do for you?"
Taking out a scroll, Ming said, "Fire Lord Zuko and General Iroh have requested your presence at the Fire Nation Capital. You're to be awarded for your assistance in the coup of the Phoenix King."
The yellow parchment unfurled in June's hands. As she read it she said, "Iroh's message told me to meet you here for something important. He's clearly an old fool." She finished reading, "Hmm, for a second I thought you said 'rewarded.' Not 'awarded.'" She handed the scroll back. "No thank you then."
Ming tucked the parchment back into her belt and took a glove from her pack.
"Iroh is not a fool," she said. "And he figured you would say that. He told me to give you something that your Shirshu could track me with, and that from now on I'm your liaison to the Fire Nation, in case you change your mind."
Ming gave her the glove. Nyla the Shirshu sniffed it excitedly.
After a moment, June fixed her eyes on the soldier. She looked back with a challenge on her face.
"Then I guess I'll be seeing you around," she said as she mounted Nyla.
Ming smiled, "I guess so."
Leaving Ming in the clearing with her plank-like platoon, June heard her call out, "Goodbye, June. Goodbye, Snuffly-Wuffly."
June scowled, but quietly thought that Iroh could have picked a worse liaison. At least she was attractive.
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A/N: SUPER CRACK! I love that these two had maybe, I repeat maybe, a half-page of dialogue in the whole series combined. FYI- Ming was voiced by Serena Williams.