The Life and Times of the Kazekage's Assistant

Disclaimer:I don't own Naruto. This story is inspired by a novel by Lauren Weisberger. I do own Tsubasa Imamura, any other OCs in the story, the designer labels and names of the magazines/newspapers, and the plot.

Author's Note: Happy Thanksgiving! This is my gift to you. :)

Chapter Twenty-Seven: The Take Over, The Break's Over

Seasons change, but people don't.

That was the thought I woke up with that morning, and it was an odd sort of thought to have so early. Perhaps it was some sort of premonition for what I'd face that day, or maybe that was me coming out of the cough syrup induced sleep.

Groggily, I prepared myself for the day. I hoped the cough syrup wouldn't make me too drowsy, and that I could get through the day with relative normalcy.

I took one last glance in the mirror, wondering if anyone would be able to tell I was tripping off the cough medicine dosages I'd been giving myself every evening so I'd be able to sleep. I hated the thought that I'd become nothing more than a cough syrup addict, but I desperately needed something to ward off the feelings of shame and guilt.

My head had become a prison, and I didn't want anyone, including myself, making conjugal visits. I'd been dissected enough by everyone around me from Temari to the council to the people of Suna to even Kankuro, Gaara and my friends. It doesn't mean a thing anymore.

And I thought my life was boring before. It still is. It's just overcompensating with headlines and flash photography.

After rounding the corner and entering the office, I regretted not downing more of my secret supply of cough syrup. Before me stood Team Gai—not that I had an issue with their marvelously tough team of taijutsu and weaponry, but it was just Tenten I didn't need to see.

"There she is," Kankuro greeted with a grin. Out of the Sand Siblings, Kankuro was the least awkward with me. I appreciated that.

Gaara looked up briefly, caught sight of me and looked away just as quickly. The young Kazekage turned to Maito Gai and said, "Kankuro, my assistant and I will escort you to the Desert Survival Training Grounds. We will oversee your training. My assistant will participate alongside your team to ensure everything goes accordingly."

I hated the fact that Gaara refused to say any part of my name. It was just "my assistant" now. What was even worse was that I'd have to accompany that bunheaded hussy Tenten for DST and partake with her.

If only the cough syrup had knocked me out completely. Or better yet, killed me.

"Alright!" Gai exuberantly struck a pose and a shining smile. It nearly blinded me, and I almost stopped him to ask what toothpaste or teeth care regiment he used to get it that way.

I followed the group silently at the tail, while the team conversed with Kankuro and Gaara. Every time I heard Tenten's voice, I felt my blood rise more and more. It boiled the effects of the cough syrup right out of me and forced me out of my drowsy state into a state of red.

I couldn't believe she was still looked the same way since I'd last seen her and her big stupid meatball-looking buns. She was a few years my senior and she couldn't come up with a more adult hairstyle. What was it that Kiba had even seen in her?

"Are we beginning with kunai throwing practice?" asked Rock Lee, always polite when he spoke.

The Kazekage nodded. "Our kunai throwing practice may prove more difficult. You'll have to make contact with several targets through a sandstorm."

"Let's put everyone in pairs," Kankuro suggested. "Tenten and Tsubasa, Neji and Gaara, myself and Rock Lee. We'll engage in a simulated mission with a sandstorm. Make sure to hit all the targets that appear with shuriken. You'll be fired upon as well, but by paint. Try not to get hit in any vital organs, and we'll see who comes out the least scathed."

My gaze sifted over to Tenten. Her eyes were already upon me. There was a smirk, tugging at the corner of her lips and her brown eyes seemed to say, don't pretend you ever forgot about me.

The premonition I had from this morning proved correct and accurate. Though the seasons around me were changing and we were already halfway through spring, the people I knew stayed the same.

I let my eyes settle themselves on the obstacle course ahead as Kankuro gave us headsets. The desert before me looked merciless and hostile. I sincerely hoped it would swallow me up and never spit me back up. I'd rather be imprisoned in sand than have to act as Tenten's teammate in the survival training.

"Ready?" asked Kankuro after giving us each kunai with different colored ribbons tied to them to distinguish which team they originated from. Mine were light pink, like my hair, and Tenten's were hot pink (like the color of the aftermath of the Tsubasa-Punch I wanted to leave on her). Gaara's were red, Rock Lee's green, Kankuro's yellow and Neji's white.

No, Kankuro. I'm not ready to be Tenten's teammate. I'd rather kill myself. I'd rather feed myself rat poison, or drive senbon into my heart.

"Go!"

I crouched low to the ground, not taking any chances of being hit by the paint snipers or by the rough sand grains that were quickly lifting from the floor. Beside me, Tenten crouched too, instinctively knowing what to do.

Damn her.

We took cover behind a large jutting rock as sand grains began to tear through the air surrounding us. I reached into my leg pouch and retrieved some goggles despite how uncomfortable I felt with the stinging air. When I turned to see how Tenten was faring, she already had her goggles on too. I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

Glancing over my right shoulder, I spotted our first target and slipped my hand into my waist pouch to retrieve a kunai. I flinched when a kunai with a hot pink ribbon soared past me and hit the target dead on.

Tenten, accurate as ever, smirked beside me. My fingertips released their grasp on the kunai I was in the process of removing from my pouch. Casually, I tucked it back in its place.

Alright, Bunhead, you want to make this a competition?

Let's go.

When the storm subsided somewhat, we both bolted out from our positions, racing through the desert sand. It's difficult to run through sand, unless you're accustomed to it (like I am) because it weighs down your steps and prevents you from moving too nimbly. It makes you clumsy, but I was able to dart through it just fine.

Tenten, on the other hand, had a much more difficult time, which was why the next few targets were hit by soaring kunai with light pink ribbons.

We pressed on through the obstacle course, both streaks of different shades of pink. Warrior cries pierced the air. I couldn't help but notice an intimidated Rock Lee and Kankuro as we whizzed by. I didn't pay them too much attention though. The next target was ahead and I felt my arm poise itself into a ready position with a kunai clenched in my hand.

My compatriot was ready too. We threw our kunai at the same moment, but then a shuriken knocked mine, angling it to hit off center. I glared over my shoulder at Bunhead. She, of course, was grinning. If she wanted to play dirty, we could.

I discreetly summoned a sand clone, which materialized far ahead of us. The clone didn't take on my form as usual. Instead it stealthily maintained its grainy visage and blended with the dunes. I tossed an explosive seal at her and then tucked myself between two huge boulders.

The sand blasted at Tenten, pushing her far behind me as I continued onward once it was safe to proceed. The look of shock on her face was priceless. Maybe I got a little carried away, but it was too late to worry about that now.

I successfully hit the next three targets, not at all distraught by the kunai with white and red ribbons. I wasn't competing with the two genius ninjas like Neji and Gaara. They'd always be of greater caliber than me. It was Tenten who was my true rival.

I should have considered that Tenten would be quick to recover, but when I felt bolas wrap around my ankles and secure me to the floor where I ate some sand, I regretted it.

"See you at the finish line," Tenten smirked, "Partner."

I spat the sand out, wiggled myself into an upright sitting position, and cut myself loose with the slash of my kunai. I chased Tenten down, our rivalry at full throttle.

We threw rocks at each other, kicked sand in each other's faces and played other dirty tricks all the way until the very end of the obstacle course. Kunai with light pink and hot pink ribbons were strewn about everywhere. Many of them connected with their targets, yes, but many of them were carelessly adorning the sand because we had gotten a little too throw-happy with the blades.

Gaara, Kankuro, Neji and Rock Lee were already at the finish, totally unscathed. Tenten and I, however, were not so fortunate. Our hair was in this direction and that, spraying out from our heads in messy clumps, our clothes were torn and filthy with sand and dirt, we were breathing heavily from the exertion and our eyes had the crazy look of competitiveness within in them. We looked absolutely mad.

"What took you ladies so long?" asked Kankuro incredulously as he examined our battered appearances.

We were both still huffing when I replied, "Got caught up in the storm for a bit."

I could feel my thong successfully ride up and pinch in the most awkward of ways. I hoped that somehow Tenten's boobs got misarranged and was contorted just as awkwardly as my underwear. When I saw her try to discreetly straighten her blouse near her chest, I knew my hopes had come true. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of me adjusting my posterior wedgie. I'd grin and bear it for the time being until I could slip away into privacy and fix it.

The subject was dropped, and we were finally allowed to call it quits. Well, quits as in no more DST at least until after lunch. My competition with Tenten would continue, however.

"First one to the door," Tenten whispered to me when we neared Sand Castle.

I didn't respond. Instead, I bounded for the door. We were neck and neck, uncaring that we were embarrassing our companions with our absurd competitiveness. We tied to the door, but it didn't end there either. The rivalry was guaranteed to continue.

"When Kakashi and I compete," I heard Gai tell Rock Lee, "it's usually in good fun, but I think there might be a deep-rooted issue here."

Gai, you have no idea.

"Tenten is giving her best effort, and as her teammates, we should cheer her on," said Lee with an encouraging smile. I don't think he realized the part where Gai mentioned that we had deep-rooted issues. In Rock Lee's mind, it was all innocent. It was cute of him to think that way.

"She's humiliating our team and our purpose here," Neji remarked, turning his head the other way. It was to emphasize his disdain, because we all knew that the Hyuuga nearly had 360 degrees of a visual field. His arms folded across his chest as he condescendingly imagined himself elsewhere.

"I will do one-hundred push-ups each time Tenten has a victory," Rock Lee said, fist pumping next to his Sensei. "I will do two-hundred push-ups if she loses so she knows I am pushing hard for her!"

Neji scoffed. Gai laughed nervously along with Kankuro. Gaara was silent. Bunhead and I didn't care what any of them thought.

I glared back at Tenten, who was already glaring at me. Her fierce brown eyes stared deep into my ferocious blue ones. I could feel the electricity between us, the hate just seething. It was like two lionesses had crossed each other's path, both after the same gazelle.

I knew we had both made it incredibly awkward for everyone around us, but we couldn't stop. Even Gai approached me, elbowing me in the ribs and gave me a wink to lighten the mood.

"Word is that you're the Kazekage's girlfriend. Reminds me of my spirited youth!" He placed his hands upon his hips, threw his head back and laughed heartily in his own reminiscence. "Oh, yeah! I remember what it was like to hold someone special in my arms and to be completely smitten!"

That snapped me out of my glare-feud with Tenten and placed me into a state of embarrassment. I could feel the blush spreading across my face like wildfire.

I watched as an over exaggerated tear slid down Gai's cheek when he began to speak again. "I'm so overwhelmed by all this love in the air! It's completely charged with such youth!" His fist excitedly pumped through the air several times.

I didn't bother to correct him, to tell him that the Kazekage and I were no longer a thing. Gaara, I noticed, was quiet and hadn't made an effort to correct him either. Surprisingly, neither did Kankuro or Temari (who had joined us for lunch and the second half of DST).

Tenten, however, had no problem saying, "I read in the news they were broken up actually, Gai-Sensei. Probably shouldn't bring it up because it's still a touchy subject for her. It must be hard to feel like you're on top of a pedestal only to be knocked down." She patronized me by patting me on the shoulder roughly. "You poor dear."

"Thank you, Tenten. How considerate of you," I said through gritted teeth.

At lunch, we raced to finish our food first, almost starting a food fight right there in Sand Castle. We raced all the way back to the Desert Survival Training Grounds one-footed to see who was the quickest and had the best balance.

Tenten won, but only because she stuck her stupid meatball bun ahead of us. Excuse me for not having an idiotically obtrusive and protruding hairstyle. I was so frustrated. I knew I wasn't the greatest shinobi, but I at least expected to do better than Tenten in some instances.

"Still the loser of Suna," Tenten remarked snidely.

I was at wits ends. The competition between us was escalating, worsening. What I was about to say wasn't going to make things better. "Still providing services in the Leaf Village," I grunted to Tenten as we donned sunscreen over our skin. I spoke quietly enough for just Tenten to hear, but I wouldn't put it past Neji or Gaara to have been listening. Both had extremely keen senses.

Neji was the only one of the two who may have had any inclination what my comment was regarding, but even he wasn't too well versed on the subject. He only knew minor details. Even if he did know more than I figured he did, he wasn't the type to bother in such matters. I wouldn't doubt it if he was aware of the situation because Tenten had perhaps confided in him about it as a ploy to make him jealous.

Bunhead was so stupid. She should have known her place like I did. Someone of that stature didn't like someone of our mediocrity.

"Jealous that I have a service to provide and you don't?" Tenten grinned. She pretended to squeeze the bottle of sunscreen too hard and it squirted on my skirt at my inner thigh like a love-making (skeet) stain. Mortified, I frantically tried to rub it off, but the stain had already set in the cloth.

Smirking, she shut the bottle of sunscreen and set it down next to me. "Let's face it. You're a virgin who can't fight."

Where I had tried to keep our conversation private by whispering, Tenten made it public by speaking in a slightly louder than normal tone of voice. Everyone around us was now aware of the situation, and her comment was a pretty obvious clue to the conversation.

My eyes fell downcast. I didn't know what to say. There was really nothing that I could say. I couldn't decide if I was more humiliated with her comments or if it was the fact that I'd let things escalate so much.

Everyone's faces ranged from shock to horror. Kankuro's usual goofy expression was gone, replaced by a look I couldn't even begin to describe. His buzz was killed, and it was clear he regretted assigning me to DST with Team Gai.

It was clear Temari had lost her patience. She didn't seem too upset with me, but she did arch an eyebrow at Tenten. She seemed to be waiting for me to take charge or take action. I'm not sure what it was Temari expected from me.

Rock Lee seemed to be searching desperately for kind words to say, but could find none.

Neji looked completely pissed and Gaara was unreadable.

Then the Kazekage sighed and rose to stand. I begged whoever was controlling all my bad luck to ease up just this once and not let the Kazekage fire me in front of everyone.

"Tsubasa-san's services are none of your concern," Gaara said at last, "but if you must know, she does an excellent job."

"What?" Tenten was visibly startled, as was everyone else. Her face had contorted itself into one of utter bewilderment and I thought even a little resentment.

I glanced over at Temari and Kankuro. The eldest Sand Sibling seemed smug, like she knew more of what was going on than I did. Kankuro didn't bother to hide his peals of laughter.

"There's a reason I selected her above all others," Gaara reiterated. "She's the best at what she does. You owe my girlfriend, Miss Imamura-san, an apology."

I forced myself not to react. I wasn't even sure what would come out. I wanted to laugh from the hilariousness of Gaara's accidental double meaning (and the funniest part was that he didn't realize it). I wanted to cry from how embarrassed I was. I wanted to die where I stood to end this awkward situation as quickly as possible.

Rock Lee was bright red. Gai Sensei was grinning. Neji didn't even seem like he wanted to be here any longer.

Thanks to Gaara's interesting choice of words, I sounded like the ultimate girlfriend. In other words, one that put out all the time and was up for new challenges (as in kinkiness). I can't say I felt pleased about that kind of over exaggeration.

After an uncomfortable chuckle, Maito Gai stepped forward. He had his hands on hips, eyebrows waggling as he said, "I hadn't realized the Spirit of the Youth was so overwhelmingly vigorous and vivacious here in Suna! It reminds me of a time when—"

"—Gai-Sensei," interjected Lee, "I do not think that it is the correct time to reminisce upon that type of youthful spirit!"

"Perhaps you're right, Lee." Gai patted his protégé on the back with a mighty hand and chuckled more. The youth beside him was still a very bright hue of red, unbelieving his Sensei would reveal the lady-killing days of his youth.

"You'll have to excuse my team," Neji spoke suddenly. "I'm ashamed of their behavior today."

"Neji's right," Gai added. "Tenten's vibrant spirit has perhaps proved too much to handle for all of us today. It's probably best we postpone this."

No one disagreed.

The group was urged to retire for the rest of the evening instead of resuming Desert Survival Training. The training would be continued the following day. Gaara decided to assign another team to accompany and guide Team Gai to ensure there were no more distractive situations. No one argued with him.

-The Following Morning-

"Imamura-san, I need to see you in my office," said Gaara, first thing, as he walked into the office.

He stopped at my desk for a moment to emphasize that he wanted me to follow his orders this instant so I rose to stand. He led me behind the French doors and closed them behind me. He took a seat at his desk and motioned for me to do the same. I obeyed.

And no, screwing around like an idiot with Tenten to prove who was the better kunoichi, woman, person, or whatever for the sake of a sense of pride and bragging rights was not worth being fired for. Because I'm pretty sure that's what Gaara wanted to see me in his office for. Sure, Tenten had started the competition and the insults, but I had been just as guilty by continuing them and exacerbating the issues. The fault was mine too.

She may have embarrassed Team Gai, but I did worse in embarrassing the Kazekage and his siblings. After that realization, I was ready to put my own neck on the chopping block and call the orders to decapitate me.

Folding his hands underneath his chin, he stared at me for several moments. He seemed to be contemplating whether he should bring up whatever it was on his mind. I could tell that he found his resolve when he sighed deeply and straightened his posture.

"The blackmailer has been silent for a while since my sister's threat," he said and then paused. He was waiting for a response from me.

"That's good," I said, grateful that this wasn't about Tenten or our awful behavior. "I can't imagine anyone would be foolish enough to mess with Temari-sama."

He nodded and continued. "However, the council has grown very suspicious of our reasons for breaking up and is urging me to fix the situation with you. My siblings and I believe it's safe to resume our false relationship. However, I do not want to impress upon you any more than I already have."

I couldn't hide my surprised expression. This was quite a predicament I was in already. I didn't think I could become even more tangled in this web, and yet there I was practically cocooning myself in the webbing. "I can do it," I told him, "I can go back to being your girlfriend—your pretend girlfriend."

Thoughts of Kenshin flickered through my mind. I reminded myself that Gaara wasn't asking me to be his real girlfriend. He was asking that I be his fake one for sake of the council. I also was disguised whenever I saw Kenshin. There was no real risk there.

The only risk I would truly need to be concerned over was Kiba. I was back in communication with him, yes, but I'd leave it at that. I couldn't let Kiba back in, but I also couldn't cut him off. Just because the blackmailer was silent for now, didn't mean he or she wouldn't resurface. I needed some type of connection to someone in Konoha just in case.

Perhaps being back in the fake relationship wasn't the healthiest for me in my already unstable mindset, but I wasn't doing this for me. I was doing this because Gaara needed me to.

"Are you sure?" His gaze was on me, examining me to see if there was any hesitance or reluctance. All I could feel was my heart race within my chest. I felt so joyful suddenly, so inexplicably happy.

"Yes," I replied. "I'm absolutely positive."

Of course I was certain. I would do anything he ever asked of me. Anything and everything. This morning the thought I'd awoke with was, "Season change, but people don't." I had been correct about that. The seasons had been changing all around me, but I was stuck in the same hopelessly in love rut with Gaara. I wondered if that was ever going to change. I didn't think so.

I realized that the path I was walking on was reckless. The slope I was shooting down was treacherous just like the small spark of hope I had.

And I liked it.

A/N: Looks like Tsubasa and Gaara are back on, but will it last?

Do you think it's good for them to be back on so soon after their fake break up? Do you think that this will antagonize the blackmailer or silence him/her?

How do you think Temari and Kankuro will treat Tsubasa? More importantly, how do you think Gaara will treat her?