STRAWBERRY PANDEMONIUM PART 5
Author's note( once again): I am going to be writing these dinky little notes every time I publish a story. The purpose is to communicate my intentions with the minority of the denizens that actually come here to read this. This note's main objective is to state that the majority of my stories are stream of consciousness writing. I have a lot of things to purge from my cluttered mind, and this is the only way I could do it without any actual effort on my part. With that being said, this is supposed to be a sort of avante-garde/strange humour story, and if you're looking for something along the line romantic fluff lines of Usefuloxymoron's stuff, I suggest you leave right now.
Now that that's out of the way, let's continue on with the story.
Chikaru and her troops marched out into the depths of the Miator dorms and found new horrors around every corner. The first years were the ones that were picked on the most by the inter dimensional beings that seeped through the cracks Kagome made. Out of concern for the limited number of bullets however, Chikaru and her two heavily armed henchmen kept their guns to themselves.
Strangely enough, most of the beings that manifested themselves in the dorm were faceless green men in business suits, systematically picking up little girls and throwing them against walls.
Lucy heard a crowd of voices in her head. Perhaps the green men had some kind of telepathic capacity.
'I don't get it, why aren't they attacking us?'
Chikaru said without turning around, ' They are a collective group known as Anonymous. They will attack us if they perceive us as a threat, but for now, they're doing their thing.' Chikaru pointed at a crouched Anonymous in the process of turning a first year girl into an exact replica of itself.
'Oh dear Lord.' Lucy whispered in a horrified voice, 'Why don't we go and help them?'
'Because, we need to conserve our ammo for the main auditorium. That's the only way we'll be able to access the boiler room.'
Himeko fidgeted with her hair, 'Why don't we call the police? I mean....having some back up would be nice....
Chikaru scoffed, 'The cops can't do anything. Besides, we're stuck in a secluded private school at the top of a remote forest mountain. Do you really think they are going to find us? And to add on to that. Didn't you catch Oshibaru's little speech about cutting all the phone lines?'
A sickening squelch sounded from behind Chikaru. Another student was being turned behind her.
Lucy growled, 'And to think that I cannot stop them with my vectors. They have this sort of void surrounding themselves.'
'But if you catch them unaware, it will destroy them.' Chikaru stated, 'Which is why our best bet right now would be ignore these shenanigans in the hall and move along-
Tamao suddenly woke up in Chikaru's arms. She blinked once or twice like a newborn fawn and looked in her lover's eyes, 'Chikaru....chan....what's happening?'
'Just....calm down, There's a little bit of a problem here at the school, but it's nothing we can't solve-
Tamao gave another whistling tea pot shriek as an Anonymous peered over Chikaru's shoulder, 'LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU!!'
Without ever letting go of Tamao, Chikaru nimbly leapt out of the way while the Anonymous scratched it's bald green head and marched away in a chilling robotic fashion.
'What....are....those things?' Tamao sounded like a fat kid without his inhaler.
'That's the problem.' Chikaru mumbled, 'But, there's no time to explain. Just follow us, okay?'
Tamao choked down several protests and gulped spastically before complying with her girlfriend's orders, 'They....won't kill us, will they?'
Chikaru looked over her shoulder and saw an Anonymous wandering around aimlessly, 'I don't think they'll do much if you don't bother them. Just don't make any sudden movements and you'll be fine.'
All of a sudden, the PA announcer blared, crackled, and spat out in a distorted version of Kagome's voice, 'Attention Anonymous! There are a bunch of newfags in the vicinity- one of them is a pink haired neko wannabe, another is a dumb blonde, two little brats, a dark haired drama whore, and her blue haired dyke girlfriend. Assimilate them or destroy them, I don't care- just get rid of them!'
A chill went up Lucy's spine, 'This....is really bad. How did she know we were here?'
'Beats me, but....RUN!!!' Chikaru shrieked as went into a maniacal sprint with Tamao in hand. Closely following was an extremely irritated Lucy, Chikaru's two henchmen, and at the very back, poor Himeko who possessed no sprinting ability whatsoever.
To Chikaru's horror, the Anonymous suddenly stopped their molasses-like robotic gait and transformed it into a systemized and exaggerated version of army calisthenics knee lift running. Though it wasn't exactly efficient, they were quickly gaining on the helpless travellers.
To make things worse, they started to recite the rules of the internet in emotionless grating voices that were perfectly in sync with their immaculate foot steps.
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Yaya awoke with a thorn from the rosebush stuffed up her ass. To add to her misery, she had landed on none other then Kaname and Momomi- the latter having a face full of Yaya butt and the former having her face crushed by her three inch heels.
Yaya mumbled something amidst the torrent of complaints and obscenities being spewed by the terrible two.
'What the hell!? You could have had me paralyzed!' Momomi whined, 'What the fuck are you doing? Dropping down from such a height!?'
Kaname simply glared at the black haired girl and intoned, 'On that note, what the fucking hell is going on here? There's retarded creature lurking around every corner of the school- I even found this cat-like creature that calls itself moot stuck inside one of the toilets when me and Momomi were having our daily afternoon sex sessions in there-
Momomi's face turned puce, 'SHUT UP!!'
Yaya sniggered.
'Tell us what's going on, or we'll beat the living shit out of you and then rape you.' Kaname said in a voice that wasn't completely devoid of a touch of fear.
'Yeah. And then we'll rape you some more.' Momomi said in a self satisfied voice. Kaname glared at her with a 'you killed the joke' sort of look.
Yaya sighed, 'To tell you the truth, even I don't know what's going on around here, except that Kagome is the root of all this crap that' been happening to us.'
'Please elaborate.' Kaname absentmindedly scratched her manly buttocks.
'Well, she's doing these satanic rituals in the basement of the school, and she's ripped open these holes in the space/time continuum.....besides those facts, I don't know any more.'
Kaname scratched her chin, 'That girl was always kind of creepy- don't you agree Momomi?'
'Yeah. She's frequently mutter these strange tongues under her breath every time she had one of those lengthy conversations with her teddy bear. It sounded like Latin or something-
Momomi's ears suddenly perked up, 'Wait, hold up. Did you guys hear that ?'
Kaname listened intently, 'It's a water sprinkler. Who would turn that on at this time of the day?'
More water sprinklers turned on of their own accord, creating a cacophony of mild sounds of urination that amounted an almost numbing sound of static.
'Those aren't the usual amounts the sprinklers spew out....' Yaya pointed out, 'Oh....shit....'
There were several anonymous standing beside each of the sprinklers. The grass started to smoke as the water turned to acid.
'Shitshitshit!!!' Yaya squeaked, 'Let's get the hell out of here!'
The three stumbled out of the rosebush and ran towards the greenhouse.
Unfortunately, one of the Anonymous had taken off his clothes and was lying in a perfectly camouflaged naked pile with the grass. It grabbed Momomi's ankles and caused her to fall on her face.
'Momomi!!' Kaname gave a growl and stomped on the naked Anonymous, 'GET. OFF. HER. YOU. FREAK!!' Kaname heard a sickening crack and saw a second year girl under her foot rather than a naked unisex creature.
'So when they die, they revert back to their previous states....how strange....' Yaya looked at the several lumbering Anonymous and wondered what each of their original forms were like.
Kaname looked at the dead girl under her foot in shock while Momomi scrambled to her feet, 'We can't stay here any longer! Let's get going!!' After ten yards of sprinting, she was grabbed by another Anonymous lying naked on the ground.
'They're like chameleons!' Yaya thought incredulously. Under closer scrutiny, there perhaps hundreds of naked anonymous lying on the ground in wait of unsuspecting victims. The fact that it was night didn't really help either.
Momomi thrashed and screamed while the hand slipped and shuddered with uncontrolled spasms, leaving bits of greenish goo behind on her calves.
Yaya and Kaname both shrieked in unison and proceeded to stomp on the Anonymous' head.
After thirty or more vicious stomps, the green figure lay on the ground with a puddle in the place of it's head. Bits and pieces of skull decorated the grass.
The other Anonymous seemed to take notice of this offence and subsequently rose up from the grass with green erect penises that were at least 8 inches long.
The three girls huddled together back to back.
'If this all ends badly, I want you to know that we're sorry for everything.' Kaname said in an uncharacteristically hyper speed and high pitched voice.
Not knowing what to make of this rather clichéd statement in such a dire time, Yaya simply nodded, 'Tell that to Hikari....' She murmured in a deadpan voice.
Momomi shrieked, 'WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!'
'Or get raped.' Yaya said in a contrastingly dead and quiet voice.
Kaname shook her head violently, 'No, No! This is not how it's going to end! I will not leave this world until I have engaged in S&M with Momomi!!'
Momomi's mouth moved around violently as she tried to voice something. She finally sputtered, 'Don't tell her that!!'
Yaya gave a stone cold chuckle, 'Well, this is where my black belt Tae Kwon Do training comes into play.'
Kaname goggled at her, 'You know Tae Kwon Do!?'
Yaya shrugged, 'What else can a tomboy do?'
'THEY'RE CLOSING IN ON US!!' Momomi bawled.
Yaya stood in her ready stance, 'Ready to kick some ass?'
Kaname was not beside her.
She was cowering behind an equally terrified Momomi all the while gibbering garbled versions of dinner table prayers she barely memorized in her first year. Yaya snarled, 'What the fuck do you think you're doing?'
The shuddering blue haired figure that was once the holy terror of the school was now reduced to a quaking and sobbing pile of Dere dere crying.
Yaya called upon all her Tsundere powers and launched her first flying kick at the head of the detestable green nude men.
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'Rule 34, if it exists, there is porn of it. Rule 35, if no porn found at the moment, it will be made.' Chanted the robotic voices of the marching green men. Sporadic concentrations of cartoonish grotesques paraded along with their green brethren. An anime girl with gigantic with cocks in place of the nipples shat out large logs of feces being eaten by a loli with a large 'W' plastered on her forehead.
The travellers reached the staircase spiralling down into the grand hall and found Chikane toting a grenade launcher at the bottom.
'Himeko! I'm coming to rescue you!' Taking large, graceful bounds up the stairs, Chikane flicked off the safety and blasted several volleys of grenades at the band of freaks behind the terrified group.
Lucy felt a blast of heat prickle the back of her neck as the shockwave knocked her onto Remon, who subsequently started a domino effect that eventually toppled a very surprised Chikaru. The hapless five toppled down the stairs in a flailing tangle of limbs. Chikane only had time to utter, 'Oh, fuck me sideways-' before the human snowball added her to its collection.
Himeko, flew above the bouncing snowball as if to say, 'fuck you, I'm taking the express way.' Being the slowest runner in the group, she felt the full effects of the grenade's shockwaves and consequently flew in an almost straight trajectory towards the chandelier in the middle of the dining hall before changing her arc to a downwards swoop and landing on the groaning disbanded human snowball.
Slimy bits of green goo flew everywhere, along with bits of gristle and bone of the destroyed Anonymous. Unfortunately however, one inter dimensional being avoided being maimed and swung around the chandelier.
Pedobear stood tiptoe on the crystal structure and looked down at the tangle of Moe girls groaning and squirming in very suggestive ways. Although they were a little old for his taste, it was still going to be a pleasure to indulge in some teenage jailbait....but wait.
He noticed Lucy and calculated....that she was legal.
An adult was tainting his little angels with her fully developed body and her foul woman's smell. Oh, she was going to pay for this....
Lucy spat out a mouthful of Chikaru's hair as she struggled to disband herself from the pile. When she did so, a face full of brown fur met her face and knocked her down.
Pedobear kicked, scratched, and attempted to maim that deceptive moe-looking face with his uneven claws. Oh, she was going to pay for contaminating his stash, she was going to-
Lucy grabbed hold of the three foot freak and plucked the spastic thing off her face, 'What...the....fuck?'
It took a moment to register, but when it finally did, Lucy gave a shrill scream and dropped the sputtering bear. His cock was fully erect at a monstrous 8 inches.
'Oh, for pete's sake!' Lucy snarled as she fumbled around for Himeko's katana.
Remon and Kizuna crawled out of the pile and found hairy bear cock right in front of their faces. Pedobear giggled and garbled something incomprehensible and started to rub his member against Kizuna's bony butt as she attempted to crawl away.
Pedobear suddenly felt a cold clamp around his penis and found Chikaru to be the perpetrator, 'No one touches Kizuna and Remon except me!!'
Tamao's mouth quirked in surprise, 'What was that supposed to mean?'
Chikaru's eyes glowed red as her grip tightened and tightened, eventually causing Pedobear's penis to explode in a shower of bright red gore.
The castrated pedophile lurched back, clutching the half that was left. He pointed a shaking finger at Chikaru for a second or two before running into the darkness that was the math wing.
Wiping her bloody hands on her skirt, Chikaru turned to her two associates, 'Are you two okay?'
Kizuna nodded slowly while rubbing her buttocks.
Tamao stared open eyed at Chikaru, 'What was that....little ditty you just said?'
Chikaru gave a chortling laugh, 'I have past relationships too, right? These two used to be my 'friends with benefits', but we found out that....our tastes differ.'
Tamao nodded in agreement. Chikaru's tastes did err towards the kinky side a little.
The two second years' faces were beet red, 'Don't tell her that, Chikaru Sempai....' Remon muttered.
Chikane stood up abruptly from her prone position under Himeko, 'This is no time to discussing relationships. We should get moving as soon as possible. The dining hall is under siege, and Shizuma needs backup.'
'What are they fighting with?' Lucy murmured.
'The utensils and the butcher knives, but there's only so much you can do with those. I've packed this grenade launcher in case anything like this happened.'
Himeko cuddled close to Chikane, 'You're so prepared.'
'I know. That's what you get when you spend several months battling freaks piloting giant robots.'
'I'm not really sure what you guys are talking about.' Lucy frowned.
'Don't worry. We won't expect you to believe it anyways.'
Himeko looked at Lucy with glistening doe eyes, 'Don't mind Chikane- it's quite a crazy story anyways....'
Chikaru felt her temperature rise up as she witnessed the crumbling of her leadership, 'That bitch is stealing my thunder....this reminds me of the student council....' She cleared her throat, but was interrupted by Chikane once again, as she spat out orders to the motley crew, 'Tamao! You're in charge of distracting the Anonymous, while Remon, Kizuna, and....erm....what's your name again?'
Lucy rolled her eyes, 'Lucy.'
'Ok, and Lucy will retrieve the vats of boiling oil from the kitchen.'
Lucy felt the throbbing pain return to her invisible appendages. She rustled around the pockets of her skirt and was rather surprised to find a small bottle of Advil.
Popping two pills in her mouth as inconspicuously as possible, she took a huge gulp and felt two stony tablets take their sweet time down her gullet.
'This is definitely not a good day....' Lucy thought in dismay as Chikane barked out more and more orders. Himeko stared at her partner in awe and admiration.
Chikaru cleared her throat even more loudly, 'Ahem! Don't forget about our main objective! We need to get into the boiler room to stop that little brat K
