Author's Notes: I do not own Doctor Who. Thank you so much for the reads and reviews! Please let me know what you think and happy reading!
"Are we there yet?," asked Josh.
The Doctor looked at Josh next to him. Oswin was driving the air car, Lydia and Donna were up front, which meant he currently had the dog on his lap as he sat between the twins.
"Not yet," said Oswin.
"Why couldn't we take the TARDIS?," Josh complained.
The Doctor was eager to answer this one because he really didn't want Donna to know the real answer. "Well, you know, get you out of the house, see a bit of scenery, I used to play out here when I was your age."
"Don't you mean the Master isn't allowed within a hundred kilometers of a TARDIS?," asked Oswin.
Donna looked back from the front. "Why is he not allowed within a hundred kilometers of a TARDIS?"
"It's a sort of probation thing. Really, he's mellowed a lot."
"And you're taking our children here why?," asked Donna.
"Why did you say 'our?'," asked Ella.
"I misspoke," said Donna.
"Collectively, they are ours," said the Doctor.
"I think it may be a bit early to be referring to things collectively," said Donna.
"Or a bit late," the Doctor countered.
Donna groaned and turned back towards the front.
"Doctor," said Ella.
The Doctor looked down. Her eyes were big.
"He's not very bad, is he?," she asked.
"No," said the Doctor. "He never does anything to children."
"What about dogs?"
"Wouldn't think so."
Donna stepped out of the air car in front of a creepy looking Time Lord house. She wondered if all Time Lord houses looked like that. The door opened and a man with cropped blond hair emerged eating an apple.
"Hello, ginger!," he shouted.
The Doctor stepped out of the air car and next to Donna.
"So, your friend thinks he's funny," said Donna.
"Oh, I ought to have known she was with you," moaned the Master. "What happened to the ears?"
Josh and Ella stepped out with Esther.
"You're traveling with children now?!," he asked incredulously. "And a dog? What is this? 'Lost in Space?'"
"When have you ever watched 'Lost in Space?'," asked the Doctor.
"I've had a lot of time on my hands and there are only so many Scissor Sisters albums. I was bound to get sucked into American television sooner or later. So, what brings you to Mount Perdition?"
"You and I should talk," said the Doctor.
The Doctor walked away with the Master.
Donna turned to Oswin. "So, how mad is he?"
"Oh, very," said Oswin.
The Master was laughing maniacally in a manner that usually heralded the downfall of governments.
"So, to summarize, your wife left it in her will to marry a woman that you've already had children? That's just..."
He again erupted in laughter as the Doctor rolled his eyes.
"Are you going to laugh or mock me?," asked the Doctor.
"Oh, Doctor, I can do both," said the Master.
"You could probably keep quiet about the bit in the Oracle's will," said the Doctor.
"Or what?," asked the Master.
"Or I'll tell the Chancellor what really happened at his birthday party."
The Master pointed. "That's not fair."
"So?"
They found they were soon joined in the lab by Donna.
"Nice house," said Donna, "Very creepy."
"No one said humans are known for their interior design."
"Funny, never heard that Time Lords were design experts." Donna looked at the Doctor. "So, why did we come all the way out here?"
"I have clearly done something to mask the children's true identity," said the Doctor. "We have to sort out how to undo it."
"Why would you hide it?," asked Donna.
"To keep them hidden from humans or Daleks or Judoon or-"
"Okay, Master, that's enough," said the Doctor. He turned to Donna. "Yes, it would be safer for them to go undetected."
"Then why would you want to undo it?!," Donna screeched.
"Because I'm their father and it's important that they know who they are."
"Well, I'm their mother and they know exactly who they are!," snapped Donna.
"Oh, just not the part where they're half Time Lord!"
"What does it matter? They're just children?!"
"Oh, and if our situations were reversed, you would just say that was fine by you?"
"How would our situations ever be reversed?!"
The Doctor stopped, puzzled by the sound of someone talking.
"Is there a woman on the telephone?," asked the Doctor. "Wait, when did you get a telephone?"
"No, that's..." Donna glared at the Master. "Are you playing 'Let's Have a Kiki?'"
The Master was clearly in his own world. "What?," he asked, offended. "It's not like you needed me in the conversation."
"Oh, God forbid we ignore you," said Donna. "I'm sorry, I'm trying to work through some personal issues without a complete egomaniac trying to make this about him!"
The Master looked at the Doctor. "Did you tell her I was an egomaniac?"
"He didn't have to tell me. You call yourself the Master!," said Donna. "Not quite Mother Teresa, are you? That or you've got some kind of horrible fetish."
"Anyway..." said the Doctor, eager to change the subject. "What would you do?"
"No Chameleon Arch?," asked the Master.
The Doctor turned to Donna. "You don't have a watch you can't account for, do you?"
"No..." said Donna.
"Well, then that's out," said the Master. "Okay, how about this? Since you're almost as clever as me-"
"More clever," said the Doctor.
"Yeah, just go on telling yourself that," said the Master. "You might do what I would do which is disguise them with a lock that would eventually be opened anyway."
"The Untempered Schism!," said the Doctor.
"Wait, is that where you take little Time children to stare at a hole in the ground?," asked Donna.
"Mostly..." said the Doctor. "It's a gap in the fabric of reality, that's all."
"That's all?," asked Donna. "I saw Lydia after she went. She was upset for weeks!"
"It's overwhelming," said the Doctor. "You... adjust."
Donna turned to the Master. "How about you?"
"Oh, I went mad."
Donna turned back to glare at the Doctor. "I don't bloody think so!"
"Come on, everyone does it!"
"When they're eight," said the Master.
"Oh, well," said Donna, "they just turned seven."
The Doctor looked at the Master. "Whose side are you on?"
"Tell you what, leave me some tissue samples and-"
"Oh, no!," said the Doctor. "No more clones!"
"What clone?," asked Donna.
"She's not a clone, per se," said the Master. "I did redistribute and recombine the DNA with the use of this machine I found."
"Stole," added the Doctor.
"Recombined? Into what?," asked Donna.
The Doctor let out a sigh. "Jenny."
"Wait, is that why I've never seen her?," asked Donna.
"The results were less than ideal," said the Master.
"Which is why you shouldn't have done it in the first place!," the Doctor snapped. "You should never have used my DNA without my permission!"
"It's not like I could use my DNA!," said the Master. "I'm crazy!"
Donna groaned and walked out.
"Donna..." the Doctor whined after her helplessly.
"She's feisty, that one," said the Master, punctuating the statement with a low purr.
"You can work on a way to unlock Josh and Ella without exposing them to the Untempered Schism," said the Doctor.
"Well, in case you haven't noticed, I don't have access to any temporal anomalies here!," said the Master. "It's a condition of my probation."
"Oi! Saved you from execution, didn't I? Just make some theoretical models with computers or sticks from ice lollies!," said the Doctor walking out after Donna.
"I haven't got any ice lollies!," the Master shouted after him.
"Donna!," the Doctor called, following her through to the hall of ancestral statues. "Donna, stop!"
Donna turned. "What?"
"I know this is a lot to take in-"
"Oh, is it?," Donna asked, her voice dripping with contempt.
"I want to raise Josh and Ella and be a father to them."
"They're doing just fine," said Donna.
"Donna, please."
"What? Do you want to take them to the zoo every weekend?"
"What?," asked the Doctor.
"I've been raising them on my own," said Donna. "I've done a pretty good job and I don't need any help."
"Donna..."
"Stop whining my name!"
The Doctor stiffened. She was angry at him about something he hadn't done yet. "Well, you aren't any more," said the Doctor. "I'm responsible for them and I won't let you stop me."
"Take me home," said Donna.
"Are we leaving?," asked Ella.
The Doctor and Donna turned to see Josh and Ella.
"I don't want to leave yet," Josh continued. "Why do we have to go?"
"You have school," Donna stammered.
"I'll be visiting you after school," said the Doctor.
"There's really no need, Doctor," said Donna.
"Oh, yes there is."
Josh and Ella exchanged glances.
Donna just groaned.