Came back from holiday yesterday morning at 3 am, and hurriedly wanted to type this chapter, so apologies for any mistakes. I will get around to fixing mistakes later on. Hope you enjoy!

He didn't know why these thoughts kept coming back to haunt him, they weren't even appealing to him. Every time they got too close to the surface, he would squash them like a bug under his shoes. And just like bugs infecting a house, they would come creeping back from nowhere and slowly infiltrate his mind. Just a week ago he had not had a single improper thought about the blond, but now? They sprang to the front of his mind at any opportunity they got. It was like being a freaking teenager again. As if one teenager in the house wasn't enough already.

Naruto was of course totally oblivious to the internal fight in Sasuke's mind. He seemed happier than ever, and hadn't stayed out a single night since his birthday. He also seemed to think that it was just fine to hug (or, well throw himself at) Sasuke without much reason. Or lean on him if they sat beside each other on the couch. Generally they had not become more physical with each other; Naruto had always been a very physical person. But it had changed from being mock punches, kicks and pushing around, to becoming more friendly touches.

Sasuke honestly didn't know what to think of it, so he tried not to think about the subject at all. He went to work as usual, and Naruto would always be there when he got back.

Neji had had the guts to ask him about whether he was seeing someone since his schedule had become so regular in the last few months. With an icy voice he had given some poor excuse about the "puppy" needing company. He didn't know if Neji bought it or not. He couldn't say that he had really put much thought into a permanent solution for Naruto's living arrangements, and this became blaringly obvious to him one evening when his brother called. Itachi just wanted to discuss their Christmas plans, since he would be back in the country by then.

These people lived outside the little bubble he had created around his home, and they burst the illusion that everything was as it should be. What would happen if anyone found out about the homeless boy living with him? Naruto wasn't actually supposed to be here. The thoughts about letting Naruto go was just as troubling as the ones about Naruto's child-adult status and everything it included. So Sasuke dealt with them in the same way; he pushed them away.

He had come home from work half an hour ago and was preparing dinner. Naruto chopped vegetables next to him and was humming happily along with the song in the radio.

"I'm done with the tomatoes, do we need anything else?"

"No that's fine. The meat just needs a few minutes more."

Impatient as always when it came to food, Naruto stepped closer to him to peek over his shoulder. The blond settled his head on Sasuke's shoulder and the raven tried to shrug him off, annoyed by the invasion of his private space.

"Move, idiot. it will not get done any faster, just because you watch it cook."

"Hey Sasuke, can you feel it?" Naruto asked with a teasing sound to his voice as he moved his head so close, that his cheek touched Sasuke's neck.

Sasuke tensed. What was the kid talking about? "No. Now get off." He answered through grit teeth.

As a response, the blonde slid his cheek along Sasuke's neck repeatedly.

"Okay that's enough!" he growled and pushed the boy away. The kid just smiled back at him very, very smugly.

"I've got stubbles."

Sasuke frowned and rubbed at his neck to make the scratchy feeling go away."Hn. Good for you." He said sourly. "If you already noticed, then take care of it."

"But you said you'd show me how?" Naruto pouted.

Did I say that? Oh, yeah I guess I did. Hn.

"Fine I'll help you after dinner, just to make sure you don't make a mess of yourself like last time."

"I didn't make a-" one dark look stopped him from finishing the sentence. "Okay maybe I wasn't perfe-" a raised eyebrow stopped him this time. Then he grumbled something about bastards and went to sit down at the table.

They ate, cleaned up and went into the bathroom for Naruto's "shaving lesson". Naruto sat down on the toilet seat and Sasuke sat opposite of him at the edge of the bathtub. At first Sasuke tried to give Naruto directions on how to do it.

"So like this?"

"No! More gently, or you're going to cut yourself."

"Uh, okay, so this way?"

"You're doing it in the wrong direction!"

"There's a right direction?"

"Of course there is, you have to do it like this- "

"Ow!"

"Ugh, give me that, or you'll end up like last time." Sasuke ordered and took the razor out from the tanned hand. He grabbed a hold of Naruto's chin with the other and carefully steered the face to the right.

"Notice how I do it, okay?"

"Mmh hnnh." Naruto hummed in confirmation and looked at him with big frightened eyes.

"I'm not going to cut you, as long as you sit still." Sasuke said in a low murmur.

"Mmm."

Sasuke let the razor run along the jaw, the chin, then tilted Naruto's head up a little and let it graze along the upper part of his neck. It was different from doing it to himself, and his eyes were sharply focused on Naruto's skin to make sure he didn't cut the boy.

He was especially careful around the scars marring the tanned cheeks. He paused for a moment to let his thumb stroke away a blob of shaving cream on Naruto's bottom lip. The skin was warm and moist, something he would never notice on himself. Sasuke had no stubble before he turned eighteen, and even now he would never have been able to grow a beard, with the little amount he did have. His Asian ancestry made sure of that. He imagined how Naruto's father must have looked. Some huge blond Viking looking guy with a massive beard was all his imagination could come up with. The corner of his mouth pulled up into a barely visible smile.

He pushed the upper lip down gently with his finger to remove the hairs on top of it. He caught Naruto staring at his face, and the blond fidgeted in his seat. As he shaved the other side of his neck he could see the Adam's apple bob up and down as Naruto swallowed. He finished his work and studied the skin thoroughly with both eyes and hands.

"There, all done." He said and suddenly caught onto how uncomfortable Naruto looked. The boy tried to look anywhere but at Sasuke, and his face had turned red. Sasuke quickly pulled his hands away.

"You can wash off now."

"Okay."

He watched silently as Naruto splashed water on his red cheeks. The easygoing and comfortable feeling he usually associated with being in the company of the younger male was nowhere to be found; quite the opposite actually. An awkward feeling had snuck in between them, as if some sort of boundary had been crossed. It was like they had ventured into something too intimate, that neither of them knew how to deal with. But helping Naruto out shouldn't have felt intimate in any way, it was just the most practical solution, that was all there was to it. Or at least Sasuke tried to tell himself that was the case.

There was nothing inappropriate about what I did. Was there? Ugh, my mind is going in circles, why do I keep thinking about such things? But Naruto is clearly embarrassed, I must have done something.

Sasuke gave a short instruction on how to clean the razor, in a monotone voice. Naruto's usual curiosity seemed to have cooled off for the time being and he simply nodded in answer to everything.

The attempt at steering them back to normal didn't seem to work at all, and Sasuke left him in the bathroom, so the boy could have some privacy for his shower. Listening to the running water he tried to get some work done, just to have something to occupy his mind. After a few minutes he gave up with a frustrated sigh, and simply stared at the screen of his laptop as if willing it to do something, to make him focus.

He was tired and his mind wandered without his permission. When was the last time he had actually touched another human being and felt the heat of bare skin against skin? Sure Naruto had begun hugging him, but that was not the same as what had just happened. You didn't just walk up to another person and start feeling up their face. Had he even touched his lovers in such a way? No, but none of them had really been lovers, more like acquaintances' with benefits. Not even friends with benefits, since he had cared more about the physical compatibility than the mental. He didn't do intimacy. Just no.

That must be it! I am so unused to dealing with people on a close hold, that's all. Other people are probably used to all the affectionate stuff and physical closeness that comes with living so closely with someone else. It is just my brain and body getting confused about the sudden change. I can't even say it has been too long since I experienced… well, being with someone… 'cause I never have. Not even family wise, me and Itachi were never like that. Neither were my parents. I must have been acting strangely and Naruto picked up on it. I guess I'll just have to learn how to live with it; it seems to come pretty naturally to other people.

He felt an immense sense of relief at having convinced himself there was nothing weird about what was happening. It was a natural process of having to get used to something new, nothing more. He had become so used to Naruto being physically close to him all the time that he hadn't put much thought into where the limit of said closeness was, other than the most obvious. He would just have to learn along the way and hope to avoid any other tense and awkward mishaps.

It was Saturday evening, and they were both waiting for a movie to begin. Naruto stared at the microwave, impatient to get his popcorn, talking to himself about who knows what. Sasuke watched as the blond got the popcorns out, cursed when he almost spilled them, and cursed again when he burnt his fingers. Watching Naruto fumbling around was almost better than watching an actual movie, Sasuke thought and snorted in amusement.

Naruto sat down next to him at the couch, and began showing popcorns in his mouth. Sasuke wasn't really a fan of the snack, but let Naruto eat them anyway, even though they made the entire apartment stink. A few minutes into the movie he felt a weight settle on his shoulder.

Sometimes it baffled him, how some physical things apparently were totally okay and others not. Hugging and leaning on each other was fine, but touching Naruto's face, as with the shaving incident, or his hands weren't. He had taken a hold of Naruto's hand at one point and the younger had blushed and pulled back. Flustered and confused by the reaction, Sasuke had forgotten why he did it in the first place and they had both been tense afterwards.

It was also okay to ruffle up the blond hair, but not to tug it behind an ear. Ruffling it or giving a noggie would make the blond laugh, but tugging the unruly locks into place brought on an entirely different reaction. The big blue eyes would suddenly look vulnerable, and Sasuke didn't want to make Naruto feel that way.

Sharing a bed was, for some reason he could not comprehend, also all right. He had wanted to avoid it after his little revelation earlier, but it had only taken one bleary eyed blond, sitting sad and alone in his kitchen at three am once again, to change that decision.

Maybe he should have put more thought into why he even bothered touching Naruto, instead of where, and how to do it. Or maybe he should have thought about what his suddenly changed attitude on the subject might do to Naruto. But everyone can be wise in hindsight.

As they sat in comfortable silence, Sasuke shifted a little against the blond. The teen was like most teen boys are before they grow into the shape of a man; all bones and awkward angles. Naruto's sharp shoulder hurt his arm so he lifted it and brought it around the blond's shoulders instead. Naruto tensed for a moment and then seemed to melt to fit against his side. Sasuke watched the action movie and all its explosions with an absent look on his face, when he felt eyes staring at him. He turned his head, about to ask, what the matter was, and was met with intent blue eyes.

He shifted again, so he could face Naruto properly.

It was sudden. Very quick, just a peck on the lips, and totally unexpected on Sasuke's part. It was so very soft and warm against his lips that time seemed to stop for a moment. Then the lips pulled away and reality came rushing back.

Naruto had closed the distance between them in the blink of an eye, and destroyed every thought of innocently playing house that Sasuke had convinced himself of. Blue wide eyes were staring at him and nervousness and hope was written all over Naruto's face. As the seconds ticked by and Sasuke did nothing but stare back in shock and disbelief with his mouth slightly agape, Naruto cheeks became more and more red. The smaller male shifted in his seat and his eyes flickered uncertainly back and forward between his lap and Sasuke's face, searching for an answer.

"Naruto… this-this is…it's not…" Sasuke stuttered out while slowly, almost robotically shaking his head. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest that he could hear the sound of blood rushing in his veins, and the movie had become a faint background noise.

All hope left the young face and the crestfallen look which replaced it almost broke Sasuke's heart. Those lips that had just kissed him ever so gently were now quivering trying to get words out, that wouldn't come. A half choked noise escaped past them and Naruto rose from the couch stiffly.

It felt cold on the side Naruto had been pressed against.

The blond stood rigidly and then almost ran to his room, eyes locked on the floor. But Sasuke had already seen the hurt in them and was just about to follow the blond, to say something, do something, anything that would remove that hurt and make things good again. He was shocked that he had not been the only one thinking about his housemate in more than just a friendly manner, but that didn't make it right!

Sasuke's brain clearly told him "Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!" while his heart screamed for him to go in there to correct the mistake. He wanted to let Naruto know that it was okay, that he wasn't mad, that he didn't hate it. But he held himself back, though it hurt to do so. It had all seemed so very wrong to even consider Naruto as a romantic interest, when he thought Naruto was innocently unaware. It had only made him feel like a creep to think about it.

Now when the boy suddenly showed he wanted it, a flood of thoughts overwhelmed him. Feelings that had been swept under the carpet, were suddenly coming forward. He had wanted Naruto. Did want him. But Naruto was a boy, not a man, not yet. Sasuke was eleven years older than the kid for crying out loud!

So at the same time as he realized the depths of his own feelings he crushed them, before they could be given time to bloom and become something more.

He shut the TV off and went to his own bedroom. A strange emptiness settled over him, but it did not prevent his thoughts from buzzing around in his mind. The thoughts didn't let him rest and followed him even in his sleep.

No, he is so young, it's not a lover, but a parent he needs. He shouldn't be here with me.

Maybe, I could let him…

We could live here, just the two of us, like we have so far, no one would have to know…

No! I shouldn't feel this way. Neither should he. I have to tell him. I have to make things all right.

Would it be possible if…?

What if?

Uh yeah, it was somewhat difficult to write this chapter, but I hope it turned out all right. Feel free to let me know what you think of it, I appreciate constructive criticism or any kind of feedback :)