Here it is - the final chapter. Sequel is up next week though! And I would love to know what you think...did I surprise you? Did you like it? Review, people!
"Edward, I need to go to La Push today," I said, brushing my hair methodically. He sat on my bed, watching me, and I met his eyes in the mirror. "It's not what you think. I'm going to cut ties with Jacob. I've been thinking about everything, and it's for the best if I tell him I can't be friends any more."
Relief spread across his features, but it was chased away by concern. He stood and came to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and nuzzling my neck. "Love, I'm not sure you're thinking clearly," he murmured into my ear. "First last night, now this…are you sure you don't want to wait and think things through? Carlisle told me you're still not well."
This was only one of the reasons I loved him so much. I knew he was desperate to get rid of Jacob, but he was willing to push that aside for fear I'd do something I'd regret for the rest of my life – which I was, but I didn't have a choice.
"I'm okay, Edward," I said, pushing all my sincerity into my voice. "I'm really, truly, okay. What happened to me was horrible. But it also made me realize some things – like what's really important, and what I have to let go of."
"I love you," he said into my hair. "God, Bella, I love you so much."
"I love you too," I whispered. "I'll be back by lunchtime. Get some hunting in with Emmett and Jasper."
He kissed me fiercely, and then was gone with a whispered, "Be careful and call me."
I waited a few minutes to be sure he was gone before taking Jacob's dreamcatcher off my headboard and stuffing it inside my jacket.
Jacob came bounding out of the house when I pulled up, wrapping me up in his sinewy arms. "Bells!" he crowed, setting me down and taking a good look at my face.
"Something's wrong," he said.
"Yes," I whispered. "Can we go into the house? I have to talk to you."
He slung him arm around my shoulders, and I didn't protest. This would be one of my last days with him, though not in the way I had told Edward.
Inside, I handed him the dream-catcher. "When you gave me this, you told me if I ever wanted you to, you could use the elders' chants on it. And whenever I was around it, I could hide from vampires. Remember?"
"Yeah…"
"I need you to do that for me now."
"Did your bloodsuckers threaten you?" he growled. "If you're afraid of them, we can protect you, you know."
"No," I cut him off. "I'm not afraid of the Cullens – I'm afraid for them."
I explained everything to him, leaving nothing out. I made him understand exactly what would happen if the Volturi saw fit to visit Forks.
"I need your help," I pleaded, tears rising against my will. "They have to believe I'm dead. They have to be so sure, they will never search for me."
"I'll go with you," he said, already making rash plans.
"You can't," I interrupted him. "If you disappear, they'll know. Please, Jake. This will have to be goodbye."
"You're asking me to abandon you? To let you just disappear and start over somewhere? I'll never see you again." His voice broke slightly, and so did my heart.
"I'm asking you to save the lives of the people in this town," I said, with more strength than I thought I possessed at the moment. "And that includes the vampires and the wolves."
He buried his face in his huge paw of a hand. "What do we do first?" he asked finally. I hugged him, feeling my tears rain down on his back.
"We have to curse the dream-catcher, then plan out exactly how we're going to do this."
"Popcorn for the human!" Emmett hollered, setting the giant bowl in my lap.
"Emmett," Esme reprimanded quietly. "Must you yell?"
"Sorry," he grinned, looking very unrepentant. I looked at the mound of popcorn that I would never, ever be able to eat.
"Don't worry," Edward whispered in my ear. "I'll make him eat what you don't."
Emmett pouted and I threw a piece of popcorn at him. It bounced off his head and tangled in Rosalie's hair. She reached up and very slowly pulled it out.
I automatically steeled myself for her glare and scathing words. Tension settled over the room – the last time I'd accidentally gotten something in Rosalie's hair, Emmett had had to keep her from killing me.
She looked up at me. I swallowed. I heard the beginnings of a growl in Edward's throat.
And then Rosalie did something that completely took me by surprise. She laughed.
It wasn't a bitter, derisive, mocking laugh – the only kind I'd ever heard from her before. It was a genuine, warm-hearted laugh.
And she was looking right at me. I smiled back automatically, amazed. She tossed the piece into the trash without even looking. "No harm done."
The tension melted away, and the room dissolved back into normal chatter. Esme sat on Carlisle's lap in his armchair, Jasper pillowed his head on Alice's lap, and Rosalie waited for Emmett on their loveseat. Edward's arm tightened around me, and he smiled at me, with so much happiness in his face I felt a stab of sadness. My forever had suddenly faded into only days, and it was painful to know I had to give this up.
Jasper looked at me curiously, and I fought to disguise my traitorous emotions. It was the one thing I couldn't hide.
Emmett got the movie started, and went to sit beside Rosalie. I saw Jasper's lips move just the slightest bit, and Carlisle nodded in response. He was ratting me out.
I wasn't surprised when, after the movie was off, the family scattered and Carlisle came to sit next to me. I steeled myself, the temptation to tell him everything nearly overwhelming me.
We sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes, his arm gentle around my shoulders. How was I going to give this up? This warm, loving family who had adopted me, and why I didn't know.
"You can always tell me anything," he finally said, his voice so tender it brought tears to my eyes. "No matter what it is."
"I know," I whispered, laying my head on his shoulder. "I guess I haven't fully recovered yet."
He stroked my hair, just being there for me. "I love you," he said, "and if you ever want to talk, I'm there."
"I know," I said. "I love you too."
Reluctantly I pulled myself off the couch and into his arms. "I'd better go, Charlie will be worried."
He hugged me gently. "Goodnight, Bella."
"Goodnight, Carlisle." Goodbye, Daddy. I'll miss you.
As we walked out of the living room, Esme came out of the kitchen and pressed something into my hands. "So you don't have to cook supper for Charlie," she explained. Again tears sprang to my eyes. "Thanks, Esme." For everything. You were more of a mother to me than mine ever was.
She gave me an understanding hug. I savored it, knowing it was the last one. "I'll see you when we get back," she said, referring to the hunting trip they were all about to take over the weekend. I just nodded.
Carlisle stayed behind to talk to her, and Emmett popped around the corner. "Leaving already, Bells?"
"'Fraid so," I said. You are the best big brother ever. I wished I could tell him that, but I was afraid they might get suspicious and stay behind, and I would lose my opportunity.
Jasper still looked confused as my emotions bounced all over the place, but he smiled as Alice hugged me goodbye. "Night, Bella."
I believe in you, Jasper. I always have. Take care of Alice for me.
Rosalie even smiled at me, a tentative olive branch, and I touched her hand as I went by. I sure would have liked to get to know you, Rose.
"Sleepy?" Edward asked, as we climbed into my truck for the drive home. "Not really," I said. "When are you guys leaving?"
"As soon as I get back," he replied. "Are you sure you'll be all right?" he asked, concerned, knowing I was still having trouble with the nightmares.
"Yes," I assured him, forcing my voice to be confident. "I haven't had any trouble for awhile. Besides, you need to go. How long has it been since your whole family went hunting together?"
"Awhile," he admitted. I parked the truck. "Coming up to say goodnight?" I asked, forcing my smile to stay steady.
"Of course," he said, with that crooked grin I loved.
He stayed for about an hour, and when he had to go I kissed him goodbye. "I love you," he said, resting his forehead on mine.
"And I love you," I replied.
"Goodnight, see you on Monday," he called softly, and was gone.
Goodbye, my love.
I took a good look around my room, memorizing it. I could take nothing with me; not even a few of my books. Edward would be spending a lot of time here over the next years, I was sure, and would definitely notice if they were missing.
I knew he would not be dragging himself off to the Volturi again, once he learned of my death. I had forced that promise out of him, after we'd gotten back together after the first time, and Edward wouldn't break it. I believed that he would even be all right again, with time. Things were different about him this time. He was more mature, more responsible, more self-sufficient. And even though it nearly tore my heart out to think it, he didn't need me so agonizingly, desperately much anymore. I didn't doubt his love; not for a moment. But he wouldn't be committing suicide this time around.
Jake was meeting me in La Push. He would help mask my scent all the way to the airport, and then I was on my own. The thought was terrifying, and heartbreaking, as I thought about what the Cullens would come home to. And Charlie and Renee…I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. I could not think about that now. There would be time to fall apart later.
Before I could talk myself out of my carefully laid plans, I hollered goodbye to an empty house and climbed into my truck.
When I got to the curve of the road just past the border at La Push, Jake came sprinting out of the trees. He was carrying the sack containing the dream catcher and the envelope I'd asked him to keep safe for me. I just hadn't told him it contained over thirty thousand dollars.
Alice and Edward, and even Esme or Carlisle, thought nothing about leaving a hundred dollar bill in my truck or in my pocket. They would never take it back, insisted I save it for college or something – clothes, if I listened to Alice. I had just saved it, and over time it had added up. When I'd decided on my plans, I also took some of the clothes Alice had bought me – many of which still had tags on them – and returned them, pocketing the money. I felt bad about that, but I couldn't see that I had any choice. I would need it if I ever planned to make a new start.
Jake gave me a rough hug and handed me the sack. "You might not want to watch this," he warned, and I frowned, anticipating what he was going to do to my beloved truck.
He climbed in, shooting me an apologetic glance, before throwing it in reverse. Squealing backwards, he left some impressive skid marks on the asphalt before throwing it back in forward gear. The black marks would indicate I had slid on the wet road and lost control.
As my truck hurtled towards the edge of the cliff, Jake threw himself out just before it bounced over and plunged into the water below.
I let out my breath and raced over. "You okay?"
"Me?" he sent me a disbelieving look for even asking. "Of course."
His gaze softened. "Are you ready for this?"
"No," I choked out, "but let's go."
Two hours later, I boarded an airplane in Seattle. I had settled on Colorado to start with, knowing the Cullens thought nothing of going into Montana and even Canada to hunt.
Demetri couldn't track me, and if Jacob did his part no one would ever know I was alive. The Cullens were safe.
I wiped away a few subtle tears as we left Washington behind. It was all up to Jake now. He'd assured me it would be no problem to hide his thoughts from Edward, and he was even sure he could hide it from his pack brothers. All he would have to do was concentrate on the immense grief my death would have brought him, and everyone would be happy to stay out of his head.
I had kept the secret. I would keep it until I died, every day for the rest of my life. I didn't regret taking that bullet for Carlisle, even though it had led to this.
But for the first time I fully understood the depth of what it had cost me.