Jean and Robbie

She couldn't concentrate for the rest of the day. Her heart ached over James and the relationship they had. She desperately wanted things to be simpler so that she could just give herself to him completely without any of the complications that existed. Sighing deeply, she put her head in her hands. James and Robbie were like Father and Son, she knew that and she hated to be the one causing this big secret to be hanging in the air between them. Robbie had noticed the change in his young sergeant. He had even been to speak to her about it, telling her how worried he was and taking is personally that James didn't feel able to discuss whatever it was with him. She felt terrible. Then there was her husband. He had kept enough secrets from her over the years with the countless affairs that he'd had, but that didn't stop her feeling bad about this. She wasn't like him and didn't want to be. Yet it was when she thought of Chris that the pain was worst. A mother always wanted to protect her child and even though he was grown up she knew the truth would cause him pain.

She was shaken from her thoughts by a knock at the office door and she tried to compose herself quickly before calling out for the person to enter.

Robbie walked into the office and she smiled at him warmly.

"What can I do for you Lewis?"

"Just need a signature on this please Ma'am," he announced returning her smile and passing a piece of paper to her.

She glanced over the paperwork and then scrawled her signature across the bottom before handing it back to him. "Is everything ok Robbie? You don't seem yourself, problems with the case?"

"No Ma'am, nothing like that, this one seems pretty straightforward now." He looked down at the floor, not wanting to look at the way she was narrowing her eyes at him suspiciously.

"Well if not the case then something else," she started, clearly not going to let him off the hook without some sort of explanation. "Look Robbie, you can tell me to mind my own business but if I can help then..."

Robbie sighed and sat down on the chair opposite Jean's desk. "It's just Laura," he began, "I've clearly upset her, she's been avoiding me for a while now and earlier I got it into my head to confront her about it. Now she's agreed that we can go for a drink later and talk, but I'm not really sure I want to listen to whatever she has to say."

Jean smiled softly, Robbie Lewis had never been one to talk openly about his feelings so she knew that he must be in a state of emotional turmoil to be confiding this to her. "Robbie, what do you want her to say? How do you want things to be between you and Laura? I must say it's dreadfully confusing to the outside world. It looks to all of us like you adore each other, she has turned down many good offers of future happiness because she only has eyes for you and yet you are still causing each other heartache and leading separate lives."

Robbie looked across at his boss, but couldn't answer any of her questions. She thought he looked like a child, hurt and upset and in need of someone to tell him what to do, but he had to figure this one out for himself.

"Robbie if you love her then you need to do something about it before it's too late." She said sympathetically.

"I know Ma'am," he replied nodding slowly before getting to his feet. "Thanks for the listening ear; I'd better get back to it."

Jean watched him leave her office and waited for a few moments before picking up the phone.

"Hi, it's me, look I need to speak to you. Can you meet me, it's really important?"

As Robbie reached his office he flopped down on to the chair. If only it was as simple as telling her he loved her. He did love her, he had done for a very long time, but it wasn't that easy. He loved Val, he had always loved Val and the feelings of guilt that swept over him when he thought about letting himself love Laura were almost too much to bear. He didn't know if he could live with the guilt. Then there were his children. How would they feel about him betraying their mother's memory? Yet Jean was right, he did have to make a decision one way or the other. He couldn't keep going on like this with Laura. He had clearly upset her and possibly even blown his chances already anyway. Glancing at his watch he realised he didn't have long to make what was possibly one of the biggest decisions of his life.

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