Disclaimer: same old song we've sung before. From the beginning and with gusto.
"I make no money, I profit in no way. I put JE's toys back in the box when I'm done and hope she doesn't get upset that I change all of the rules of the game, nightly."

A/N: In many ways, the phrase 'What's the worst thing that could happen' will be revisited over and over and over again..

The Ultimate Debate 11
What's The Worst Thing That Could Happen?
by Alfonsina

I had been reducing time spent with each of my roommates in small increments. I had known that Brett would continue to sleep with me until he found a full time playmate. I'd taken to leaving singles magazines in the bathroom, I doubt he took the hint.

Tank was aware of what was going on, so he moved Brett's apartment next to mine; Lester was already on the other side. It reduced their travel time at night, and it was less obvious on monitors where they were spending their time.

Barry had been hired while we were out of town; he was a snot nosed, undisciplined punk. I don't know what Ranger or Tank saw in him. What I saw was someone who had no class and no skills. He thought he was macho and tough, he had wrestled in college and done some cage fighting. Barry didn't quit muscle development at the neck; he was all muscle and no brains, or common sense.

Brett and I worked a takedown with Stephanie which resulted in a less than tidy appearance. I don't know how she gets the guys who like to roll in garbage, but she's consistent in it. It was one of the few times when we got covered in more slime than she did; she was proud, we needed showers and clean clothes.

We ran into Barry and Zero getting a body receipt when we dropped off Steph's skip. Zero had done his fair share of Stephanie Duty, so he merely waved and covered his nose. Barry hadn't been trusted yet to back her up, much less back up her back up.

I heard Barry mutter the 'f' word, no the other 'f' word when he saw us. Zero must have heard it too, because he tried to get Barry to shut up.

"Why are you defending them?" Barry asked Zero.

"You don't know anything about them. Don't cast dispersions."

Brett started to make a move on Barry, I held him back to the best of my ability and Zero tried to hold back Barry.

"It's not worth it, Brett," I said in his ear. "He's a newbie. He doesn't know anything about any of us. He's just making assumptions."

"I don't like anyone making assumptions about me," he said loudly enough to be heard across the room. "I really resent that he thinks he can make assumptions about you. He's never worked with either one of us."

"Get a referee," said Carl from behind the desk, "and take it outside."

"Gladly," Brett said dragging me behind him.

When at all possible, I want to be the peacemaker. There really wasn't much of a point in getting feathers ruffled anymore than they were, was there? I just wanted it to go away. I'm the bigger than most of the other guys and I don't really need to fight to prove anything. All fighting really proves is how well you can take a blow. Since Barry was already a cage fighter, my guess was that he could take several blows and land them, too.

"Come on, let's go home and get cleaned up," I said. "We can go out to dinner or do something tonight. What do you think?"

"What did I tell you?" Barry asked to Zero. "They're both light in their loafers."

The comment did nothing for Brett's temper. Brett would have walked away, could have walked away until the name calling began in earnest. I pulled him off and made him the offer of some fat free brownies and sugar free ice cream at home.

"You're right, Hal, he isn't worth it. Let's go home and get cleaned up," Brett said.

You know, I was really proud of Brett for walking away clean.

"You two are nothing but a pair of …" Barry began when Zero pulled him away. Unfortunately, Barry's mouth continued to work long after he'd been moved away.

"I didn't know that Ranger would hire a pair of fairies," he called.

I know I should be the better man, but this conversation was wearing thin. And this time, it wasn't Brett's temper that was triggered, it was mine.

H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V

"Like the man said, leave us alone. You don't know us, what our relationship is at work or in private. You need to be tolerant because you never know who is who," I said.

I let Brett into the passenger side of the SUV and asked him to start the engine. I walked behind Barry and swept his legs under him dislocating his knee.

"Son of a bitch, that hurt!" Barry said rolling on the ground in pain.

"From now on, leave my partner and me alone. No more comments of any kind."

"Don't take it so seriously, bro."

"I'm way serious, bro. Leave all of us alone. Pretend you don't know who Brett, Lester or me. We are complete strangers to you."

I returned to my vehicle and said to Brett, "I'm thinking we should watch the Music Man tonight. You OK with Meat Lover's Pizza?"

~x~x~

I'd been hearing comments in the halls about 'the three stooges' and took up the matter with Tank. No one needed to be rocket scientists to know who they were talking about. It wasn't so much that I have a problem with the Stooges, but not several times per day, it just got old. A bad trend was starting at Rangeman and it needed to be nipped in the bud.

Tank organized a seminar on cultural diversity for all of the offices, it was conducted as a webinar. I really didn't want to see the reactions of anyone else during the presentation; I just hoped it made life easier for others. Lester and Brett weren't doing well with the stigma and I was tired of coming to their defense.

Tank's seminar was conducted by an external company complete with quiz. Barry made such horrible comments throughout that he was actually asked to leave. Later that day, he was asked to leave the company. It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

~x~x~

After about two months, I was sleeping alone and glad of it. I'd have preferred to have slept with a woman, but there were none on the horizon. At least now my space was my own, my habits were my own, and there was no snoring or drooling to deal with in the middle of the night. It felt good but a little lonely.

How did I do it? Easy. I'd paid for three hypnotherapy sessions for each of them, it was money very well spent. I was going to have to look into hypnotherapy for the dating impaired, which I'd declared myself to be. One day, I'll attract women, straight women, I'm sure of it.

It has been almost six months since Brett and I were partnered in Boston and life is actually somewhat normal now. I mean, we hang out as friends as a result of the whole experience. Then again, we'd had to defend each other's honor a couple of times and that tends to be a bonding experience.

Brett was no longer playing fast and loose with women. He was dating a nice girl named Kathy; she wouldn't have even been on his radar a year ago. He had learned to take his time to look beyond the package to see the person. If he got nothing else out of the whole Boston experience, I'd say that was worth it all on its own.

Lester had taken a vow of poverty, chastity and obedience when he got back to Trenton; it was his way of giving thanks to the almighty for coming home without a new husband, namely Kevin. After a couple of months, he understood what he'd vowed to do and decided that he could just be obedient once in a while and he was poor every time he paid his taxes. The chastity thing really threw him for a loop. He almost signed his 'player of the month club' membership over to Caesar; then he found out what he was giving up, he took his membership back.

I got regular e-mails from Larry and Darryl. There were the questions about whether or not Brett and I actually broke up when we got home. I could honestly tell them that we no longer lived together, but that we had developed a really strong friendship.

Larry did send one very pointed e-mail to me about Barbie. I'd kind of forgotten about the whole Barbie discussion. I explained that I named my AR15 Barbie; Larry forgave me for thinking I'd been cheating on Brett initially. He even forgave me for 'breaking up with Brett', but he held out hope for our reconciliation.

Larry and Darryl wanted to renew their vows in June and invited Brett and me to come. I had a lot of leave time built up, so did Brett. We decided it would be worth it to get away from the office for a few of days. We might actually do some of the sightseeing Brett had initially wanted to do. The weather was better and we wouldn't have the rush or push of work obligations.

~x~x~

Two days before we were supposed to head to Boston, Brett got a call from his cousin, Cory. The grandmother who had raised them was now in the hospital in Concord, New Hampshire. Cory relocated to New Hampshire a couple of years ago and sent for his grandmother earlier this year. He didn't like the idea of her being in the Midwest all alone. Brett had agreed and paid part of her moving expenses. He just hadn't taken the time to see her now that she was closer.

The call came when we were on a surveillance shift. Why are those phone calls always so much more ominous in the dark?

"Can you come and see her? She's been asking for you," Cory had said into the receiver.

"I can be there in a couple of days," he said looking at me. I nodded my agreement. If nothing else, I respect the importance of family. Mine is in Omaha, and I don't get back often enough.

"Can we go to Concord before we head to Boston? I know it isn't on the way, but it's close. Please?"

"Of course, we'll go there first."

~x~x~

Since I'd lived with Brett earlier this year, I knew that I had to pack differently than if I was traveling with anyone else. I took twice as many razors, toothbrushes, and other toiletries than I would normally consider. I even went to the store and bought him extra socks and jockeys; I was going to be prepared this time around.

I was about packed when I realized I didn't have a suit that fit anymore. Brett had called the boys about the dress code and it wasn't completely formal, but a suit was in order. Brett made a phone call to a friend who worked at a big and tall men's store so they'd know I was coming in and we were on a deadline.

I picked out a nice charcoal grey suit; very serviceable. Not fancy and not trendy, but it would work for weddings and funerals for several years to come. I bought a couple of button downs to go with it and a new tie. I don't have much occasion to wear these things, but sometimes you really should look nice.

Brett talked me into new shoes while I was at it; said it would finish off the look. He was right, Bates boots just don't work with a formal suit.

I spent more money on the clothes for a commitment ceremony than I was planning to spend on the entire trip. Well, sometimes it's expensive to do the right thing.

What's the worst thing that could happen? I would have a suit hang in my closet, unworn, for several years. Not so awful, I could definitely live with that.

~x~x~

All hospitals look the same to me, big, cold and impersonal. They all smell the same too: bleach, antiseptic and sickness. None of them have decent sound systems; unless you are actually trained to understand what is being said over the speakers it could be Mandarin Chinese for all I can ever tell.

We got to the room at the same time Cory was coming out of it.

"Thanks for coming," he said as he hugged Brett. "It's been a long time. You doing OK?"

"Yeah. How is she really?"

"Let's talk down the hall," he said. As an afterthought he asked me, "Hey, could you sit with her so she's not alone?"

"Sure, but I don't know what to say to her. I don't know her," I said.

"Just be yourself. She already knows Hal's partner is coming."

I knocked on the door frame and stuck my head inside. "Mrs. Green, may I come in? I'm Hal Day, Brett's partner."

"Please come in, young man. I wanted to get to know you. Brettie talks about you all of the time."

Brett calls his granny a lot?

"He calls me twice a month. The calls aren't long, but it's sweet of him. He doesn't need to, but I love it."

"He's a nice guy."

"Tell me, is he still wild?"

Actually, he'd toned things down a lot since our trip.

"No. He's pretty calm these days."

"Is he ready to settle down?"

I had no idea. I know things had been going well with Kathy, but they'd been going slowly.

"I think you need to ask him that."

"What about you? Are you wild?"

"No. I get called Grandpa at the office. I'm pretty much boring."

"Are you ready to settle down?"

I had been on a handful of dates with Lori and didn't really know where we were headed. She was unhappy that I was going to go on vacation with Brett, but we weren't that close yet. I think if you can vacation with someone you should really know them first. Vacations, especially early on, can be deal breakers.

"I was born settled down. Like I said, I'm not the adventurous type."

"Good. You seem like you are a good influence on Brett."

"I try."

"He said you're his partner. How long have you known my boy?"

"About a year and a half."

"That's long enough to know each other's foibles and faults. And you still get along?"

I nodded. We do get along. In fact, I now saw him as a friend and not an albatross around my neck. There were still moments though when I wanted to kill him.

Did I ever know Brett's faults? I wasn't going to elaborate on any of them, because this wasn't the time or place.

"You know the only thing I want for him is that he is happy. If he's happy, I can live with any of the decisions he makes."

At about that time, Brett and his cousin came back. Brett was looking like all the wind was out of his sails and he needed to leave.

"I'm going to go to the cafeteria and get some coffee. Can I get anything for anybody?" I asked as I rose from my chair.

"I'll go with you," Corry said. "We'll be back."

As we looked for the elevator, I asked Cory if Brett was going to be all right.

"Sure, he'll be fine. But Grandma isn't doing well. Her doctor thinks this could be her last illness."

H.

"I'm sorry."

"She's old but she's had a great life. Neither of our parents did such a great job raising us, so we wound up on her doorstep as kids. She took us in and gave us the stability we needed and the love we craved."

That's sweet.

"It's part of why Brett has been such a womanizer, he's been looking for the stability of love he only got when he lived with her. I hope he changes his ways."

"He's been dating a nice girl for a couple of months."

"Is it serious?"

"I don't know. Brett doesn't kiss and tell."

"Do you?"

I raised my eyebrow and pushed the call button for the elevator.

"No."

~x~x~

"Hal?" Brett asked as I came out of the shower.

"Yeah?"

"How did you like my granny?"

"I thought she was nice," I said. "Why?"

"She liked you a lot."

That's nice, but what difference does that really make?

"She approves of you."

"Well, I guess I approve of her, too."

Where is this going anyway?

"Can we talk more about her in the morning when we head to Boston?"

"Sure. If you really want to talk now, we can."

"Nah. I need to figure it out in my head first."

"I didn't ask you what kind of a book you wanted to read this time. I brought John Grisham's Playing for Pizza. Is that OK with you?"

"Sure. I love Grisham. He does suspense really well."

"This is a book about American football in Italy."

"That'll work. I hope there aren't a lot of descriptions about the pasta, I'm watching my carbs, I wanted to look good for the trip."

I've been watching mine because I finally got my six pack back and I'd missed it.

"I'll start reading when you get out of the shower."

"I've missed reading in bed with you, it was nice this winter."

"Yeah it was. Boston really wasn't all that bad when we were there together was it?"

"My favorite part was when Lester was with us," he said. "I heard Kevin say that there was no charge for awesomeness or attractiveness."

"Yeah, and I remember Lester's answer. 'There is a charge for the funhouse mirror you use if you think you are awesome and attractive.'"

"He didn't take Lester's hint, did he?"

"Nope. I'm ready for lights out. Hurry up the shower."

"Fine. Fine."

A/N: Hal could use a nap ... He's dealt with a lot of prejudice. He's gotten his own bed back. He's gotten his 6 pack back (and is darned proud of it). He's met the only family Brett has in the world.

thanks as always for reading and reviewing! Alf.