The Sweetest Gift
(Chapter Seven: The Hard Way)
Olivia stood on the balcony looking out over the city as she enjoyed her morning cup of coffee.
"How long have you been up?" Elliot asked rubbing his eyes.
She turned to look at him standing there beside her in his white tee shirt and boxer shorts.
"You look like you had a rough night," she laughed handing him her coffee mug.
"I woke up and you were gone. It is barely five thirty and you're already dressed. How long have you been up?"
"I couldn't sleep much last night. Too excited. So, I got up around four and went for a run. Then I came home and took a shower, made breakfast and got ready to go see Tessa."
"You made breakfast?" he asked turning to look at the kitchen counter.
"I did. Bacon, sausage, eggs and toast. I also have homemade blueberry muffins about ready to come out of the oven."
"You have had a busy morning."
"I am ready to bring my baby home. But I cannot get in to see her until seven. I had to find something to do to pass the time."
Elliot smiled and kissed her.
"Sit with me and have some breakfast. Then I'll help you get things ready around here. I know you want things to be perfect for Tessa when she comes home."
"I put away the last of her clothes this morning. I have the crib and the bedding ready for her. I even bought a bunch of the same diapers and formula that the hospital is using for her. I have stocked up on everything I need for the apartment," she said opening the pantry to show him, "toilet paper, deodorant, and all of the food I will need for the next few weeks. I also stocked up on Lysol and antibacterial hand gel. There is some in each bathroom and in random places around the apartment. Bottles are sterilized and ready to go, her car seat and diaper bag are sitting by the door and my maternity leave started this morning," she said with a smile.
"Sounds like you are good to go."
"I am just excited to finally be bringing my daughter home."
"Well, why don't you sit and have breakfast with me," Elliot replied pulling her by the hand back into the apartment. "We can enjoy a morning meal together, then I'll jump in the shower and go with you to visit Tessa."
"Don't you have to be at work in a few hours?"
"This is much more important. I can take the morning off. Then I can be here with you when she gets to come home. If you don't mind?"
"No, not at all. I'm glad that you want to be here when she comes home."
"I'm honored that you would share it with me. This is a big moment for the two of you."
"For the three of us," she corrected him. "No matter how things work out between you and I, El, you are always going to be in Tessa's life. I want you in her life."
Elliot smiled.
"And I want to be there," he replied kissing her forehead. "I have to go in to work this afternoon, though. There are a few things I have to get done today. That will give you a little mommy-daughter bonding time alone together. I can stop by later tonight, maybe bring some dinner."
Olivia smiled.
"Sounds good."
"Maybe some of your favorite red wine to celebrate."
"No wine. I don't want to drink around the baby."
"I'm talking one glass here, Liv. I'm not saying we should get sloppy drunk."
"I just don't think it is a good idea, especially with it being her first night home. I want to get to know her sleep schedule first. I would never forgive myself if she woke up crying and I didn't hear her. Or didn't wake up because of a wine buzz. Tessa needs me and I want to make sure that I am always there for her."
Elliot smiled.
"You are already such an amazing mother and you have not even brought your baby home yet. You're a natural, Liv."
"Loving her is easy, Elliot. It is the taking care of her part that I will have to learn. I am determined to be the best mother that I can for her. I know what it is like to have a mother you can't depend on. I know what it is like to constantly wonder if your mother even loves you. My daughter will never have to wonder. I tell her every day how much I love her."
"And she loves you," Elliot whispered kissing her tenderly.
A couple of hours later, Elliot was showing Olivia how to buckle the car seat into the car and they were on their way home with baby Tessa.
"You didn't have to sit in the back, Olivia. It is only a few blocks, I'm sure she would have been fine."
"I know. I just don't want her to think that she is alone. This is a big world for such a little baby. It's kind of scary, isn't it Tessa?" she cooed to her new baby girl.
Elliot smiled as he watched her in the rear view mirror.
Back at Olivia's apartment he opened the car door and held the baby's carrier as Olivia climbed out of the car. He held the door for her and watched as she dropped the diaper bag in the floor beside the sofa and sat the carrier on the coffee table.
"Let's get you out of that seat," Olivia cooed as she unbuckled the baby and cradled her in her arms. "That's better, isn't it? Are you hungry? Mommy can make you a bottle."
"You have a seat with her," Elliot insisted. "I'll make a bottle."
Elliot moved around the counter and pulled the can of formula from the cabinet. After carefully reading the instructions on the back, he mixed the baby girl a bottle.
"There we go," Olivia said softly as she slipped the bottle into Tessa's mouth. "She feels so good," Olivia replied as she nestled Tessa against her cheek, "I just want to hold her forever and never put her down."
"And now you don't have to."
Elliot smiled watching her cuddle the baby girl, knowing how long Olivia had waited for this day. She seemed to be a natural and looked so beautiful holding her new baby daughter. He knew that no parent had ever loved their child more than she loved Tessa. Olivia was finally a mother.
"Mommy has waited so long for you," Elliot said softly as he kissed Tessa's strawberry blonde locks.
"I'm a mommy," Olivia said with tears in her eyes as she looked up at her partner and smiled.
"You are. And you're an amazing one at that."
Olivia laughed.
"I have only had her for about an hour. Isn't it a little early to start bragging on my parenting skills?"
"You have been her mother for two months now. And you have done everything a parent could do for her. You organized a fundraiser to cover her hospital treatments and you were there for her when her when even her birth mother had given up on her."
"I will never give up on her."
"And that right there is exactly what makes you a great mommy. This little girl is your world. That is just how it should be."
"Thanks, El. Your confidence in my ability to do this means a lot to me. She deserves the best."
"She already has it," Elliot said leaning forward to kiss Olivia tenderly.
"Aww, she is falling asleep."
"Babies sleep a lot at this age. Eat, sleep and poop. Some doctors say they grow when they are sleeping. It's good for her."
"I was hoping to play with her."
"You should take advantage of this," he whispered. "Grab a nap yourself. Your nights of peaceful slumber are over, honey. Babies don't really develop a sleep schedule until they are older, so they wake up several times a night needing to be fed and changed."
"I guess you're right."
"I can move the bassinette back into the bedroom if you'd like," he said grabbing it by the rim of the basket and rolling it down the hall.
"Are you leaving?" Olivia asked watching as Elliot took Tessa into his arms and hugging her.
"Precious little doll," he whispered kissing the baby as she grunted a bit and stirred in his arms. "I think I'll go ahead and go into work. I can get my stuff done earlier, then come back and spend the evening here with my girls."
Olivia smiled.
"I also want to take some of these pictures in and show them off. The guys at work will be so excited to know she has finally got to come home. They might even want to stop by for a visit."
"Whoa, wait a minute, El. I am not so sure that is a good idea. It is her first day out of the home from the hospital and it has already been a big day. She's a preemie, her immune system isn't as strong as it should be and I am just not quite sure if being passed around from person to person right now is a good idea. I know they all mean well and I know that no one would ever harm her on purpose, but something as simple as the common cold could easily put her back in the hospital for weeks. I know they all want to see her, I'm just not sure it's worth the risk right now."
"Maybe you're right. I wasn't thinking. I haven't had a lot of experience with preemies. Eli was a little early, but he wasn't as early as her and it was no big deal. I'm sorry. I just know how excited they'll be to hear she got to come home. That all adore her."
"I'd like to take a few days just for us. You and us," she clarified. "Maybe after that we could invite a small group of friends, Casey and the guys, over for dinner or something to celebrate. Then they can all scrub up and take turns holding the baby. Do you think I'm being too over protective?"
"No," Elliot said with a smile. "I think you're being a good mommy," he said kissing her tenderly. "Try to get some rest. I'll be back in a few hours."
"Alright," she agreed.
Elliot returned a few hours later with take out from one of Olivia's favorite restaurants. He stepped inside and set the bags of food down on the bar. The seemingly empty apartment was dark and still. He looked around the room to see one of Tessa's soft pink blankets tossed over the back of the sofa and a half empty bottle of formula on the coffee table.
"Still warm," he said picking up the bottle and making his way down the hall.
Elliot pushed the bedroom door open to see baby clothes scattered across the foot of the bed. In the bassinette across the room, Tessa laid peacefully staring up at the mobile above her with her pacifier in her mouth.
"Hello sweetheart," Elliot cooed smiling down at the baby. "Where is your mommy?"
Tessa blinked her big dark eyes and focused her stare on him. She grunted a bit and sucked on her pacifier.
"There now," a topless Olivia said as she walked out of the master bathroom as she wiped her chest with a wet washcloth.
Looking up at the man now standing in her bedroom, Olivia screamed half startled.
"It's just me," he explained. "I was just talking to the baby, I didn't mean to scare you."
"I wasn't expecting you. Well, not just yet."
Elliot smiled.
"Liv, I think that's a little obvious," he said staring at her black lace bra.
Olivia smiled suddenly feeling a bit shy as she tried to cover herself with her arms.
"We sort of had an accident."
"Is everything okay? Is Tessa okay?"
"She's fine. Now," Olivia said pulling an old tee shirt from the dresser drawer and pulling it over her head.
"Now?"
"I guess I over fed her. I gave her the bottle and she fell asleep while drinking it. I didn't want to wake her, so I just let her sleep. She woke up crying, so I changed her and fed her again. Then when I picked her up to burp her she…."
"She….?"
"Kind of blew up."
"She spit up?"
"Elliot, I have seen babies spit up. That is not what happened here. This was some kind of exorcist kind of stuff. Projectile."
Elliot couldn't help but laugh.
"It isn't funny!"
"I'm sorry."
"It was everywhere! All over me, all over her. And she just cried and cried. Then I cried."
"You cried?"
"I felt so horrible! I made her sick! She was crying and I didn't know how to make it better. I cleaned her up and eventually she calmed down. Then I gave her the pacifier and came in here to get myself cleaned up."
"She got you good, huh?"
"Yeah she did. It went right down the front of my shirt. I'm guessing letting her go to sleep without burping her was a bad idea."
"Yeah, I probably should have warned you about that."
"I guess some lessons have to be learned the hard way," Olivia replied sitting down on the bed beside him.
"Did you get any rest?"
Olivia smiled.
"Not really. I was too excited to sleep. I just laid there beside her in the bed and watched her sleep. And I cuddled with her for a little while and watched a couple of children's shows on television. She is so soft and smells so new. I love just cuddling with her, she is a good cuddler."
"Is it okay if I…." Elliot asked peeking over the edge of the bassinette.
"Sure," Olivia said with a smile as Elliot picked up her daughter and kissed on her little cheeks.
"Uncle El missed you so much."
"Uncle El?" Olivia asked.
"You don't like it? I mean I'm kind of like an uncle to her."
"It's alright. It's just…. isn't it a little weird that uncle El is sort of dating mommy?
"Sort of?" Elliot asked as his eyes shot up to meet hers.
Olivia smiled.
"Well, is dating mommy. I don't want to confuse her. Or let her grow up actually thinking that her mother is dating her uncle. The poor kid would never recover from something like that."
"For right now, I am uncle El," he said with a smile. "If things between us work out as well as they have been these last couple of days, then you and I can come up with something more appropriate before she learns to talk," he said leaning forward to kiss Olivia.
"Have you had any second thoughts?" she asked softly. "About dating me, I mean."
"No. Why would I?"
"This is a lot to take in all at once," she said smoothing her fingertips over Tessa's little curls. "You're not just dating me, Elliot. I'm a package deal now."
"So am I," he replied as he stared into her eyes. "I love you. And I love Tessa. She is your daughter, Olivia. But she will always be a big part of my life as well. I have no hesitations about dating you, with or without a baby. Tessa is just an added bonus."
"You are sure you want to do this? I don't date a lot. And I imagine I will date even less now that she is in the picture. It is going to be hard to meet someone and convince myself that he is even half good enough for her. But you….it's different with you."
"How so?"
"You have always been there. And I know you always will be. You are my rock, El. The one steady thing in my life when everything else seems to keep spinning out of control. And I want that kind of stability in her life."
Elliot smiled.
"What about you? Have you ever considered what it would be like dating a man with five children?"
"I guess not. But the idea doesn't bother me a bit. I love your kids."
"Think about it for a minute, Liv," he said laying Tessa on the bed between them as he laid back on the bed to look at her. "If things work out. And a year from now, or two years from now…..ten years from now, we decide that this is right…..this is what we both want….if we did decide to get married…..we would have six children."
Olivia smiled a warm smile and laid down as well. She stared at the little baby between them as she thought for a moment about his scenario.
"Six really great kids," she replied smiling up at him.
"Do you think that is something you could handle?"
Olivia stared into his eyes and smiled again.
"I think, if it was right and we reached that point together in our relationship…." she paused for a moment as she bit her lip and considered the possibilities. "I think that we together….as a family, we could handle anything. I'm not saying that I'm in a big rush to get married," she clarified as she shook her head.
"No. We have only been dating a couple of days. It is way too early to be talking about that…..I was just saying hypothetically."
"Yeah," she agreed. "Hypothetically. Maybe some day."
"If things work out," Elliot said hypnotized by her pretty smile.
Olivia laughed softly and Elliot smiled as he leaned forward to kiss her.
"For now, I brought take out for dinner. Are you hungry?"
"I am, actually."
"Well, what do you say we try out that vibrating infant seat? We can bring her in and sit it up on the table while we eat. That way she gets to have dinner with us."
"That sounds like a great idea," Olivia said with a smile as she scooped Tessa up from the bed and nestled her nose softly against the baby's forehead and kissed her.
In the dining room Olivia held Tessa and they watched as Elliot assembled her seat.
"There we go. These are supposed to work really well for soothing fussy babies."
"She isn't fussy," Olivia replied kissing her baby girl.
"Not now, but if she likes the seat it may come in handy later."
"Good point," she said as they buckled Tessa into the seat and turned it on.
"I think she likes it. Here is the bar with the toys," he said snapping it onto the seat as the baby focused her little eyes on the brightly colored jungle animals dangling from it. "All of the little animals make noise or and it lights up. And the seat plays music."
"I think I love this," Olivia said, "I think mommy wants one, too."
Elliot got them some plates and set the table. Moments later they were enjoying their first dinner together, just the three of them. After dinner they moved into the living room to snuggle on the sofa with little Tessa and watch a movie together before heading off to bed.