"Freddie, you're up!"

For days I had been thinking about what I could possibly say about Sam at her birthday party. I couldn't just pretend we never faught. But, it was her birthday after all, and she was my friend. I came up with this happy medium:"I just wanna say, Sam, even though you constantly cause me both physical, and emotional pain." The crowd laughed. " Heh heh. not joking. I think of you and me as really close friends."

"Apparently, I haven't caused him enough emotional pain." The crowd laughed again.

Hmm, just emotional, huh?

"Sam, you're funny, you're cool, and you're the only girl I've ever seen knock out a truck driver using only a carton of milk. So happy birthday, you crazy psychopath!"

"Woot!" We all raised our glasses (filled only with juice.) in a toast to Sam.

''

I was bored the afternoon after Sam's party and walked over to Carly's apartment to see Sam and Carly eating at the table. "Hey, What're you guys doing?"

"Carly's teaching me to be girlier."

"And I'm out of here."

"Wait!" said carly, comming towards me.

"What?"

"I want you to role play with Sam so that she know's what to do when she likes a guy." I looked over at Sam attempting to eat her food neatly. Then I ran for it. Carly quickly caught up with me.

"Come on!" said Carly.

"No!' I said in whiny voice.

"For me?"

I said: "Ohhh!" but followed her. Sam gave me a look but I shrugged. It's a hard habit to break. "Alright, what do you want me to do?"

"Just stand here, Sam, you here, and I want you to pretend Freddie is a guy you have a crush on. (She said this like it was the most crazy thing in the world.) Sam just stared at me and I rolled my eyes.

"One sec." said Sam. She opened a drawer in the kitchen and retrieved a large paper bag and placed it on my head. I knew that was going to happen.

"Sam!" exclaimed Carly.

"Well how can I pretennd to have a crush on him if I'm looking at his face?"

I was fed up."Y'know, I don't need this!" Spencer came in, and Carly went to talk to him, leaving Sam and I alone in the kitchen.

"So what happened to you not listening to please, for me?" Said Sam quietly.

I took the bag off my face. "Oh come on! I'm working on it!"

She shoved the bag back on me. "Work harder!" and she shoved me to the floor and started hurting my leg.

''

"So? What do you think?" Asked Carly.

Wow, what did I think? Sam stood before me with straightened hair in a pink shirt and high heels. Ever since Carly asked me to stand in for Sam's crush I knew this whole makeover thing was a bad idea. I pretended to be supportive, for Carly's sake. But I knew it would never last.

"She looks great."

It wasn't really a lie… She looked nice. If I didn't know Sam I would have really liked it. But it just didn't fit her.

"Well, we have to go to the groovy smoothie." and they left.

I couldn't help remembering sixth grade before Sam and I had ever met. Carly was our mutual friend and she mistakenly set us up on a blind date. I'm not kidding. Here's how it went: We both sat at a table, Sam took one look at me then stood up and screamed: "Carly! You set me up with a nerd!" embarrassing me in front of the whole I can look back on the whole ordeal with a little less sting. I could almost laugh. I was secretly hoping then was that Carly was setting me up with herself, and she was just too shy to ask me out. Pathetic, I know.

''

Wow. So as far as Sam being all girly, that didn't really last long. She got Pete to ask her out. And then ate his hamburger. Charming.

Then came the date. Carly, Sam and I were just sitting at a table, minding our own business when some bully from school came up. And then dumped fries down Sam's shirt.

"Let me handle this." said Carly. She got up and stood next to the bully and backed away a little. "Look, I know the only reason you're acting like this is 'cuz you're insecure but that doesn't make it okay for you to-- ahh!" She had thrown Carly unto the floor. I went on the ground to see if she was okay.

"Sam?" said Carly.

"Yeah?"

"Rip her head off!"

And before I knew it good old Sam was beating up a senior. Carly and I cheered from the sidelines. The senior and her two friends were soon running scared. Then Sam hugged Carly and I hugged both of them. When we withdrew, Sam asked: "You okay?" to Carly.

"Yeah, but…" Pete was right behind her.

Aww, poor Sam, I thought. She never really had a chance. He'll probably be scared off now.

"You were like, awesome."

Uh, what?

"Dude! I don't wanna date some daffodil!"

Well, okay then.

"I want a girl who can kiss good and snap a bone if she needs to."

Wow. That's definitely Sam.

So I just sort of stood in place, with that smile frozen in place. Sam left with Pete, and I got a ride home with Carly and Spencer. The whole way Carly kept talking about how great they were for each other. I just kept thinking of what an idiot that guy is. "Dew, I doe wanna day some daffy-dill." I repeated in stupid voices in my head.

The next morning I was in my living room reading The Seattle Sun (A very ironinc name for a newspaper.) when I heard a muffled noise outside my door. I looked out to see Sam out in the hallway.

"Hey. We don't have planning for iCarly today, do we?"

She turned around a little startled. Which is weird for Sam. It was also strange how red her eyes look.

I was afraid to ask. "Have-- have you been crying?"

" No. I just… didn't get much sleep."

I nodded knowingly. "Didn't work out with Pete, huh?"

She glared at me. "No. I ended things with him. He was too clingy."

"Yeah, I can see how that could happen. Especially on the first date."

"Do want to get beat up? "

"No… Sorry Sam. But for what it's worth, that guy was a loser."

"Yeah, this coming from the big loser himself."

Suddenly Carly opened the door. She looked surprised to see the two of us by ourselves in the hall. " You okay Sam?"

"I was. Before Fredward showed up." And with that she gave me a particularly nasty look and walked into Carly's loft, slamming the door behind her.

A/N: I know I took a long time to post this but I had a good reason: I wasn't sure if Pete would be in more than one episode. It was confirmed in Igo Nuclear that he wouldn't be when Sam said "I wish I had a boyfriend!" Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter write me some nice long reviews. :)

p.s.: My favorite line in this chapter is: Wow, that's definetly Sam. :)

p.p.s: Sorry it's so short! :( T-T