The Blessed Events
Within a half an hour, Wilbur and Kay had arrived at the front entrance of the local hospital. By the time they had entered the dimly lit front lobby, Mister Ed and the buggy were nowhere to be seen.
"Must have gone home to his stall!" thought Wilbur. "And I didn't even get to say thank you!"
Before another five minutes went by, the panicking Addison had taken charge of Kay.
Before another ten minutes had gone, Wilbur was pacing up and down the waiting room.
After another fifteen minutes, Addison had returned to the same chair where he had nervously held vigil all day.
Five minutes later, Addison had fallen asleep.
Two and a half minutes hadn't gone by when the nurse came for Wilbur Post.
"Mr. Post," said the attractive young redhead.
"Yes" said Wilbur, halting midstride.
"Congratulations! You're a father!"
"A father!" said Wilbur.
However, there was no one else to congratulate him, as Addison was the only one in the waiting room . . . and audibly snoring.
"It is a boy or a girl?" asked Wilbur as he followed the nurse down the hallway.
"One boy and one girl," said the nurse, with a kind smile.
"TWINS!" Wilbur exclaimed, again stopping mid-stride.
"Yes, twins," said the nurse, kindly leading Wilbur along to Carol's room.
"Carol!" said Wilbur, as soon as he saw her.
"Wilbur" she replied.
She was lying down in her hospital bed, holding one of the twins.
The nurse handed Wilbur the other.
"Is this our son or our daughter?" said Wilbur awkwardly, as Carol laughed.
"Check the bracelet," said the nurse.
"My son," chuckled Wilbur, looking at the blue plastic bracelet.
"Let's name them" said Carol, "Wilbur and Carol Junior"
"Yes," said Wilbur. "There's no better names than those"
Meanwhile, in the waiting room Roger Addison was still fast asleep. He was rudely awaken by a heavy-set middle aged nurse.
"Mr. Addison," the nurse said severely. "Imagine sleeping at a time like this!"
"Sleeping" yawned Addison. "Where am I? Where's Kay?"
"Really!" the nurse scolded. "You're at the hospital, and your wife and your son are waiting for you to join them.
"My . . . son?" inquired Addison. "I'm a father?"
"Don't tell me this is your first?" exclaimed the nurse, with a searching glare. "At your age? Well, well, robbed the cradle, didn't you?
"I'm on the sunny side of fifty!" Addison replied stuffily, raising himself to his full height. "And I'll have you know that I'm only a . . . few years older than my wife !"
"And Jack Benny is only thirty-nine!" the nurse laughed.
"Are you going to take me to my wife and child, or should I return to the lobby and ask for directions?" said Addison acidly.
"Very well," said the nurse. "Down the corridor, take your second right, and then enter the fifth door on your left. I'm busy, so you'll have to find the room yourself."
"Gladly," said Addison, marching stiffly down the corridor.
After some trouble, Addison found the correct corridor, ward and room. In the room he found Kay Addison, his son, and an elderly nurse preparing a basinet for the newborn.
"Addison," said Kay warmly, "Isn't he a little darling?
"Isn't he?" said Addison, atypically choking up with tears. "Isn't he?"
"There, there, doll," said Kay. "Why don't you hold him?"
"Here Mr. Addison," said the old nurse kindly, displaying how the baby should be held, "like this."
"To think," said Addison. "Father and mother after all these years!"
"How wonderful for you both!" the nurse said blissfully.
"Yes," said Kay. "All that he needs now is the right name . . . but that can wait."
"The right name . . . the right school . . . the right car . . . the right college . . . the right profession . . . the right wife," mused Addison, "But that can all wait."
"Yes, Mr. Addison," said the nurse, handing Addison his son. "for all that, there'll be plenty of time!"
Elsewhere in the hospital, Wilbur Post was standing in a corridor viewing the sleeping Wilbur and Carol Juniors. . . . through the window that looked onto the nursery. He was startled by a knocking on the window opposite, the one that led outside. The rain had finally stopped . . . and Mister Ed had returned and was now at the window looking into the hospital corridor.
"Ed," said Wilbur, opening the window. "You shouldn't be here!"
"A fine thanks I get," complained Mister Ed. "Exhausting myself and nearly catching my death of cold trying to take you and Kay to the hospital!"
"You're right Ed,' said Wilbur. "I'm sorry . . . you're the hero of the hour. Without you, Kay'd never had been able to get here on time!"
"That's better," said Mister Ed.
"But what if someone sees you?" added Wilbur nervously. "I could get into real trouble."
"Don't worry, Wilbur," said Mister Ed. "I won't stay for long. But I think it's unfair . . . humans loiter around newborn horses, so why can't horses go into hospitals to see newborn humans?"
"I don't make the rules," said Wilbur, evading the question.
"If you did, would you allow horses into the hospital?"
"I . . . well, I'd allow you in," answered Wilbur.
"And I"d allow you into the stable,' said Mister Ed generously. "But only after the mother and father had the chance to spend time with their new colt. Speaking of colts, which one is it?"
"Speaking of children," Wilbur corrected, "They're the two in the middle. The baby with the blue blanket is Wilbur Post Jr. The baby with the pink blanket is Carol Post Jr.
"Twins? Congratulations, Wilbur. They're perfect . . . for people.
"Well . . . thank you Ed," said Wilbur, not sure whether he was thankful for that.
"How's Kay?" asked Ed.
"I heard the Addisons just had a baby boy," said Wilbur.
"Good, maybe old brush face'll soften up now!"
"He's not old brush face," Wilbur replied.
"Okay . . . Addison then," Mister Ed said.
The two were interrupted in their conversation but the sound of an orderly rolling a bed down the corridor.
"Ed," warned Wilbur.
"Going buddy boy," said Mister Ed reluctantly. "And once again . . . congratulations."
Wilbur managed to close the window before the orderly came by.
Jack Benny, self-described (and actual)"star of stage, screen, radio and television" was famous for claiming to be thirty-nine years old . . . for over forty years!