Just a few notes for this chapter-

-Jackson is still getting along fairly well with his agency because I didn't want to turn this into another story of him on the run from his bosses for his failure.

-If you're really into this story and haven't added it to your story alert list, I would do so as it's probably going to have to change to an M rating (for language and violence mostly) within the next two chapters. As far as I know, you need a special filter to find M fics, so it won't post on the main Red Eye page anymore after the switch.

To my lovely reviewers:

trudes193- Thanks for the good review. I love that you have a response within minutes of the chapter being posted. Makes me feel fuzzy. :D

Medisha- Yes, he has been slightly OOC for me, but he's working his way back to sanity. He's much more patient with Caleb, and he's just a tad high strung right now. But I think he will explain it fairly well in this chapter. :)

Brunette bulma- Thanks! It's always nerve-wracking to write characters that already exist and that people are a fan of. I usually expect a lot of "OMG he would never do that!1". He's not so sweet in this chapter, though- he's kind of a cranky pants right now.

Jesscah- Thanks for noticing! I re-wrote Lisa's thoughts about Jackson near the end probably 12 times, and still gave it a tweak before posting. As you're probably aware, thought processes are hard to write- our brains just don't like to be linear.

SparklesFranqula- A new reviewer! Thanks for the support. Yes, the fact that you can include narratives in writing both helps and hurts the story. It helps to have more realistic dialogue since the character doesn't have to verbally express everything that they're thinking, but it hurts because while in a movie you can have clips of pretty scenery and general downtime, a story tends to drag on if you write all about the trees and whatnot (I'm looking at you, J.R.R. Tolkien).

EmpireX- Another new reviewer! Christmas in March for little Orlha. As for a new chapter, obviously it's "ask and you shall receive" at the moment.

Onward!

Chapter 10: The Boy Done Wrong Again

Jackson opened his eyes and turned over on the bed. He couldn't sleep- a thousand thoughts were swimming in his brain at a rapid rate, all screaming to be heard. Silence often had this effect on him. He had fallen asleep in the car not long after they had left the restaurant, but there was music playing then. There was the movement of the car. These little things that would annoy most people had the opposite effect on him. Often, his mind was at its calmest when he was distracted.

He envied Lisa, sound asleep next to him. She had been through as much as he had, maybe even more, and sleep still seemed to come so easily for her. He rolled onto his back, turning his head to look at her sleeping form. They had checked into a motel two hours ago. Thankfully, she hadn't questioned why he had gotten a single room- he was tired of the constant questions that streamed from this woman. And when it wasn't the questions, it was just a look she gave him that simply asked "Why?"

Jackson was not used to having to explain his every action. He was accountable to very few people in his life, and every single one of those people knew where he was coming from. They were familiar with the work that he did. He couldn't blame Lisa for always questioning- she couldn't know what the life was like and the reasons behind what he did. He didn't blame her, but he was still sick of it. His not having to explain that he paid for a single room because it would look odd to get a double was like a breath of fresh air.

He wanted a cigarette, mostly because he knew that he couldn't. His lung was not fully healed, and it wasn't a good idea to infect the wound with chemicals and tar. He hated not being in control, and itched like crazy to just suck down one cigarette out of spite.

He wondered where Caleb and Cheryl were. He hadn't heard anything from them, but he knew they could handle themselves if the Russians got there before they could get out. They would make it out alive, but at what cost? A big scene, and their life as they knew it was over. The guilt gnawed at him when he thought about them having to uproot everything because of him and his failures, especially Caleb.

As the oldest, Jackson had gotten used to protecting Caleb. He had gotten them through the last eleven years of their lives, not without difficulty, and it was beyond frustrating to accept that the tables were turned at it had been Caleb taking care of him for the past two weeks. The fact was made harder knowing that it was his own fault. He had gotten soft and allowed Lisa to overtake him on the plane, and weakly succumbed to his own rage when he chased her down. He knew that he should have counted his losses and left her alone. He would still be in the same situation with Robert and the Russians, and still have the outstanding need to end Keefe's life, but at least Caleb and Cheryl would be out of it where they belonged and he wouldn't be here with Lisa, trying to figure out how to beat the DHS on top of everything else.

Jackson turned again. Another thought that plagued him was how Caleb and Cheryl could have gotten involved with this latest development. They all worked under pseudonyms and had since they first started. How had-

"Jackson?" He sighed. Apparently Lisa wasn't as asleep as he thought.

"Hm?" he replied, turning to face her back. She rolled over to meet his eyes.

"What's wrong?" Jackson ran a hand through his hair.

"Just thinking. Go to sleep." She frowned.

"About what?" she asked. Jackson clenched his jaw. Always questions...

He knew that she couldn't help or have anything that meaningful to say, but he still felt an obligation to give her some kind of answer. She was a part of all of this now. "Caleb and Cheryl shouldn't be involved in any of this. It's not their fight."

Lisa furrowed her eyebrows. "Hasn't Cheryl been involved the whole time?"

"She got the plane tickets for me, but she just happened to work for the airline," he replied. That wasn't uncommon. His agency had someone on the inside of every major airline and other occupations for similar scenarios, but the insiders usually weren't active. This was because it was harder for someone with a permanent job to take extended vacations. The Keefe job was a perfect example. A normal person wouldn't ever be able to take off for eight weeks.

"Caleb thinks that she is still working with you," Lisa said. Jackson frowned. Cheryl hadn't worked with him in years, even before she and Caleb quit. She had worked with...Jackson groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. How could he have forgotten? "Jackson?" Lisa asked, her eyebrows furrowing in worry.

"Remember that phone call I got on the plane?" Jackson asked her, and when she nodded, he continued. "That was Cheryl. She was the one who told me it was a go." He scowled. "It was odd, but I guess I didn't think much of it. I can't think of any reason she would make that call unless she was working for Robert." He noticed Lisa's shocked face, and felt like he knew what she was thinking. "We don't work under our real names. Cheryl would have had to tell him what they were, which she wouldn't do. She would have had to send Russians after me when I was in her own house, which she wouldn't do." Lisa looked satisfied with his explanation, for once.

"Well, who else knows your names?" she asked, yawning.

"Just the higher ups," Jackson told her. "They have no reason to want me dead."

"But you failed."

Jackson laughed humorlessly. "Yes, I did, thank you. You watch too many movies. Sometimes we fail, but unless we royally screw up or betray our agency or our clients, no one puts a hit out or anything like that." He was confident that he hadn't been betrayed by any superiors. Who did that leave?

"Well, I told the government your name. The police report was probably printed somewhere, especially since it was decided that I was lying. He probably got it from there and just looked for you," Lisa suggested. "I mean, I found you, and I'm not a professional...whatever you are." Jackson remained silent. He had to admit that Lisa did have something useful to say, because what she had suggested made more sense than any option he had come up with.

Jackson closed his eyes. It actually made perfect sense because it fit with the theme. He gave Lisa his real name, which was why Caleb and Cheryl were involved. He never should have done it, and it served to rub more salt in his wounds. Caleb and Cheryl's lives and livelihoods were at stake because he had succumbed to weakness. He had made so many mistakes during this job, and now three more people were paying the price.

He sat up, flung his legs over the side of the bed and buried his face in his hands. He heard Lisa questioning him, but blocked her out. This woman...he had met so many women in his work, women who were more clever, more attractive, and not nearly as frustrating, but this woman had somehow derailed him. Every mistake that he had made in the past two weeks were because of these undefined feelings he had for her.

"Jackson?" He still didn't respond, massaging his temples. Why did she have this effect on him? Why did she make him completely ineffective, mocking everything that he was by merely existing? Everything about her was distracting- her pretty face, her tiny, fragile, but seductive body, her sweet voice, her complex personality, her intoxicating scent- all of it.

Jackson felt her hand on his shoulder, and instinctively grabbed it with his own, pulling her away from him. He made the mistake of turning around and upon seeing the look of pain on her face, knew that he squeezed her hand harder than he had intended. He immediately released her and stood up.

"Sorry," he muttered, "just...leave me alone. Go to sleep or something." He switched on the lamp next to the bed and walked to his bag, sifting through his belongings. He pulled a bottle of sleeping pills from the bag, dropping two into his hand. He knew it was the only way that he was getting any sleep. He turned to offer the pills to Lisa, but she had already turned away. He sighed. He knew that he was constantly hurting her, but it couldn't be avoided. He wasn't ready to give her everything that she asked of him.

Jackson got himself a glass of water, and swallowed the pills. With every answer he gave her, Lisa had three more questions. He had never met anyone so anxious to understand him, and he wasn't okay with it. He had never been open, with few exceptions, and he wasn't ready to share himself with her. He wasn't suspicious of her motives. He knew that she couldn't turn him over to DHS in return for her innocence- she had sealed her fate by killing that agent. He trusted her, but she seemed to want more from him. He had no idea what or how to give it to her.

He lay back on the bed and looked at her again. In some ways, he had been so wrong about her. He thought that she would be easy to control, that the only way she knew how to take care of herself was through self-imposed isolation. Take her out of her comfort zone, and she would be putty. It wasn't the case. This woman was exceptionally strong. He knew the basic story behind her scar, and he could guess the rest. He knew that he hadn't helped matters in the least by turning her into a victim yet again and had assumed he was condemning her to more years of therapy and isolation.

However, when he was tending her sprained wrist, he had seen most of her naked skin from the waist up. He finally saw many of the bruises and marks that he had left on her. They were faded, and he knew that the only remaining bruises would have been the most severe. It reminded him of the way she had fought back, picking herself up each time he attacked, and throwing it back in his face.

Jackson knew that often, re-opening old wounds hurt more than the original injury. He had put her through what was probably the worst physical and emotional pain she had experienced, and yet here she was, by choice, trusting him with her life. He had seen her in a few moments of weakness since she had arrived, but more often, he was met by a will as strong as his had been. It was as though during that flight, she had begun to drain his strength and taken it for herself.

As he stared at her, he finally began to drift off. If they were going to stay alive, he had to get his shit together. He had to be strong again, but she couldn't go back to being helpless. He could only hope that they could find a happy medium, and soon.

When Jackson opened his eyes again, he was greeted with the a clean fragrance. Lisa had obviously showered already. He turned over and saw her in her jeans and bra, struggling to re-bandage her arm. He had to smile when he saw how hopeless she looked. He guessed that she had just showered with her bandages on since as far as he knew, she still did not know how to seal them correctly. It looked like she had successfully wrapped her wrist, but she was not able to wrap her left arm with the splint hindering her right hand. Poor thing looked like a broken marionette.

Jackson pulled himself into a sitting position. "Come here," he said. Her head snapped around to look at him, but she walked to him with a surprising lack of questions. Lisa sat on the bed near him, holding out her arm as she allowed him to examine the wound. "It's looking good," he said, wrapping the bandages. "Caleb will have to take out the stitches, but I think you can get away with changing the dressing less frequently." Lisa nodded, looking at him expectantly. Jackson knew that she wanted some explanation for last night, but he wasn't going to give her one. Instead, he stood up and grabbed his bag, walking into the bathroom.

Jackson stripped down and got in the shower. He didn't bother sealing his bandages either, because he knew that he would just have to change them before they left. He did the math in his head. They had been driving a little over five hours, which meant that they had about nine left, ten with stops for gas and food. They could cut some time by driving through fast food restaurants, which would also have the added benefit of keeping Lisa out of public.

He wondered why Marie wanted to see him. Keefe still needed to be killed, but what did that have to do with him? He was never meant to take the job in the first place, let alone be the only one who could take care of it. Did she have another job for him? He was hardly in top form. She must just want some kind of debriefing, to figure out exactly what happened.

Jackson could handle that. Get to Oklahoma, figure out a plan along the way, take care of business with Marie, finish this thing with Lisa, and go home. Back to his relative solitude. His life was not unlike Lisa's in many ways. He also buried himself in work. He also did not go out with friends, mostly because it was easier not to have them. Friends meant questions when you disappeared for lengths of time and even more questions if you disappeared permanently. If you were unattached, there was no investigation when you just went missing. Jackson was an expert at making friends for a night. He could go to a bar, have a great time with strangers, and then walk away. It wasn't a bad life, really. He had enough money that he could just wait for jobs to come in and he didn't have the drama that came with a social circle.

He had to admit that he was lonely sometimes. There was a difference between choosing to be alone and just being alone because you had no one. He formed the occasional bond with colleagues, but they all knew it was sometimes a bad idea. Rick had lived in New York as well, and he and Jackson had actually been friends back when they were both low levels. The last Jackson saw him, he was lying dead on Joe Reisert's floor as Jackson bled from his bullet wounds right next to him. No one in the outside world would miss Rick. There was no one to claim his body and give him a funeral. His ashes were mixed with the other unknowns, waiting to be disposed of. Or maybe they already had been. Jackson didn't know, and he didn't really care.

Jackson eyed Lisa as he drove down the freeway. She had been very quiet, seemingly lost in thought. It was fine with him. He preferred just half-listening to the radio and remaining quiet.

"What was last night about?" she finally asked, turning off the music. Jackson shook his head, turning it back on. He did not want to talk about it. Why couldn't she respect that? Lisa again switched off the radio and stared at him pointedly.

Jackson rolled his eyes. Caleb had definitely gotten to this woman. He had no idea how many times his brother had done the same thing- remain quiet until Jackson got so uncomfortable that he ended up telling him what he wanted to know. It wouldn't work this time- too bad for her.

As the silence ticked on, Jackson sighed, thoroughly frustrated. Maybe if he distracted her with something else, she would get over it. "Do you still want to know how I got away?" he asked, knowing full well what the answer would be.

Lisa looked surprised. "Yes," she replied. Jackson shrugged.

"Well, I had someone waiting for me at the airport, which is how I got to your dad's house," he explained, "and they were waiting outside. They're the ones who took my guy."

Jackson lay on the floor, watching as Joe and Lisa walked out. With much effort, he pulled his phone from his pocket and called Jeff, who was still waiting in out front. "Quick. We're alone," he croaked out, choking on the blood that was rising to coat his throat. Within seconds, the man was in the house, carefully and quietly lifting Rick. 'Call Jessica,' Jackson said as Jeff carried Rick out of the house, referring to Cheryl.

"I told the guy to tell Cheryl what was happening. I knew she would get Caleb."

Before long, Jackson was lifted in the ambulance and on his way to the hospital. The EMT's identified him through the ID in his wallet. As such, they kept calling him Jim, telling him to stay with them. Jackson struggled to remain conscious as they drove. He prayed that Cheryl could get to Caleb in time and that his brother would know exactly what to do. He knew he didn't have to worry when the doctor met the ambulance at the hospital.

"Caleb was part of this idea to train our people in medicine so we could avoid hospitals. One of the men he met at school, Thomas, works in Miami." Jackson grinned. "At Jackson Memorial, which Caleb thought was a goddamn riot." Lisa smiled. "Thomas declared me dead. He smuggled me back to his house that night and kept me alive while Caleb jumped the next flight to Miami. They operated on me, and then Caleb took me to Minnesota."

Jackson was jostled awake. He was completely numb. He saw that he was being loaded into a van and watched Caleb setting up his IV's.'Drive carefully,' he ordered Jeff, sitting on the floor of the van next to Jackson. If they got pulled over, they were dead. If Jackson's wounds opened, he could be dead. Jackson watched Caleb inject a syringe of liquid into his arm, and felt himself lose consciousness again.

"My guy was traded for me, and Thomas made sure that his cremation was expedited through an 'error'. They're so busy there that an accidental early cremation is considered one of those horrible mistakes, but it's not a total surprise when it happens."

Lisa had remained silent through his story, looking mildly shocked. "Why didn't you just tell me?" she asked, "Why the secrecy?"

Jackson couldn't help but be slightly amused. He just explained that there were people in his agency hiding even in hospitals, and that they had knowingly and crudely disposed of a man's body with no regard, and all she seemed to care about was that she hadn't been told earlier. She was starting to sound like the people that he worked with.

"We like secrecy," he replied sarcastically.

Lisa rolled her eyes. "I'm tired of it," she said. "You keep everything from me. You tell me that you, Caleb, Cheryl, and God knows who else have been planning on how to help me, but you haven't once included me in any discussion. I want to be part of it."

Jackson scoffed. "I didn't realize that you had experience in killing government officials, taking on assassins, and making someone completely disappear off the grid," he snapped. Lisa slumped in her seat, defeated, but Jackson wasn't finished. "How does this sound? You let the people who know what they're doing figure this out, and you learn to do what you're not so good at, and just listen for once. Maybe you'll get out of this alive."Jackson sighed, softening. "If you trust me, Leese, you'll stop questioning everything that I say."

Lisa's eyes flared. "I do trust you," she spat. "I ask because I want to know what's going on in your head. You don't trust me." Jackson resisted the urge to drop his head against the steering wheel. Why do women always want to talk? Talking about your feelings was pointless. It didn't fix things- it just let one more person know the problem.

"You were the one talking about chances," Lisa continued, "I don't know you, Jackson. I want to know who you are." Jackson ran a hand through his hair, frustrated.

"Then ask me real questions," he replied. "Details about the plan aren't going to help you." He hated to admit it, but Lisa had a point. He was attracted to her, and there were times he imagined what it would be like to be with her. He couldn't really expect her to reciprocate when all she had to go on was his behavior on the plane and in the last few days. If he wasn't able to give her some kind of idea of who he really was, then there was no point wasting time thinking that they would ever be together.

"Okay. Tell me about your parents," she responded.

Fuck.

Am I the only one who noticed that Jackson looked confused when he saw who was calling him in the scene on the plane before takeoff? I decided to make my own explanation for it.

The sooner you review, the sooner you find out why Jackson doesn't want to talk about his parents.