Previously on How to Hide a Criminal...

Jellal walked out of the dressing room. Erza and Levy's jaws literally hit the floor. The blonde wig he was wearing has swept aside side bangs and it reached down to his chest. He has light blue contacts in his eyes. His outfit was a long ruffled pink dress that kissed the floor. Sleeves down to his wrists. His chest was pumped out thanks to the waterballoons being held by the giant bra. Lastly he was wearing light pink wedges.

"Daymn! Look out world! Here comes Fiore's next model!" Levy barely choked out, attempting to hold back her laughter.

Chapter 5: Hell's Playground? Hell Yes

"Are we done yet?" Jellal pouted, readjusting the balloons on his chest. "I don't like these!"

"Jellal would you just shut up and act like a man, er, woman! We're almost done. Just one more stop!" Erza scolded.

"What! Where else could we possibly go?"He whined.

"Oh just Maybel's Marvelous Maternal Make up!" Levy said trying to hold back her laughter.

"DO I EVEN LOOK LIKE A MOM?"

"Whoa Jellia, so unladylike." Levy admonished, failing to choke back her giggles any longer.

"I swear when this all blows over, I WILL PERSONALLY SEND YOU TWO TO YOU'RE DEATHBEDS!" Jellal screamed, crossing his arms.

"Well, before that you're gonna have to learn how to put on lipstick." Erza declared dragging him into the "malevolent" make up store.

"Where should we start? Lipstick, mascara, foundation? Oh decisions decisions!" Levy listed.

"Hm lets see why don't we start at the exit?"

"Lipstick it is!" Erza decided dragging the poor crossdressed blunette to explore the lipstick selection.

"Hmm how 'bout cherry number 5? It compliments your eyes!" Levy asked picking up the first one she saw.

"I thought we were gonna give him colored contacts?" Erza confusedly said.

"Ughh. This is going to be a loooooooooooooooooong stop." Jellal sighed as he was pulled to the colored contacts section.

1 looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong hour later...

"So we're going with cherry number 5 after all! Do we have everything Erza?"

"Let's see. We've go the foundation, concealer, blush, nail polish, eyeliner, lipstick, bronzor, contacts, mascara, and oh we forgot the eye shadow!"

"Oh no eye shadow! How ever will I cope without colored powder over my eyes?" Jellal faked in a girly voice.

"That's the spirit Jellia!" Erza complemented, not knowing that her childhood friend was only being sarcastic.

"What shade do you want Jellia-Chan? What do you think of shady shamrock? " Erza asked.

"You know I'm not good at fashion but the cherry charge up obviously matches the pink of my dress the best! God!" Jellal snapped.

"It's a miracle! Jellia! Welcome to the world of womanhood!"Levy exclaimed spilling tears and hugging Jellal.

"Didn't Wendy join your guild?"Jellal asked out of the blue.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Erza questioned, confused on the mention of the sky dragon slayer.

"She has heightened senses and she knows what I smell like. Well, so do Natsu, Laxus, and Gajeel."

"Hmm. Let's get you some perfume then!" Levy compromised.

"How about Strawberry Silk? or Watermelon Wind? Theres Apple Air!" Erza offered the choices. "Use Apple Air! I love apples!"

"Apple Air it is!" Levy exclaimed, while grabbing a green apple shaped bottle.

"I think we're done here" As Erza uttered those words, Jellal's eyes grew wide and he shouted in joy. "Lets go pay" When she said that, the bluenette looked over to the payout line. It had around thirty people waiting to pay, he groaned. Its not over yet... he thought.

He looked to the register. The cashier was chatting with a customer.

"Before I tried peach paradise he wouldn't even take a glance at me. After he was all over me!"

"Oh really? Let me go grab some real quick then!" The customer said, waddling off. A round of groans was heard throughout the line.

1 hour later...

"I can't believe we were in that line for an hour!" Jellal complained as the three 'girls' walked out of the store.

"Ah stop complaining Jellia! We can go get your food now!" Levy consoled.

"Oh yeah I forgot the whole reason we were dressing him up" The re-equip mage mused. Jellal sweatdropped. "Well lets go get some food!" The threesome strode to the food stall. Jellal began drooling a bit.

"Jellia! Act more lady-like!" Levy scolded wiping the offending substance of his face. "So Jellia, what do you want to eat?" The previously playfully aura turned into a tense silence.

A tick mark grew on Erza's head, "So you let us strip away your manliness and force you into girly clothes just to hide your identity so you could come shopping with me for food... AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT!?" The red head screeched.

Jellal scratched his head nervously, he couldn't tell them the real reason he wanted to go! I swore I can't... The former wizard saint thought.

"Fine Fine! I'll take some strawberry pancakes!" Levy blinked. Erza blinked.

"Strawberry..." Erza started.

"Pancakes?" Levy finished. Silence preceded their words. Suddenly the silence shattered and a loud chorus of laughter could be heard for miles. Jellal rolled his eyes as the two girls struggled to breathe through their laughter.

"It's not that fu-" The blue haired mage was cut off as another round of chuckles were exchanged at his expense. He crossed his arms over the water balloons and tapped his foot impatiently, waiting for the humor to wear off.

"St-rawbe-rry haha" Erza choked out between laughs. Gradually the laughter subsided and the trio paid for five Strawberry Pancakes, promptly leaving the mall with the occasional burst of laughter coming from either of the two girls.

Pie: Elo! Chapter five is finished! Ah Strawberry Pancakes, sounds good... *Drools a bit* Uhhh *Wipes* Whatever! I wasn't doing anything! *Gets nervous* LEVY THE GIG IS UP! LETS BUST THIS JOINT! Ah Levy... you are so awesome! Ditch Shadow Gears and join Team Natsu with Lucy~~~~~ And Erza o.o Hey I have a quick question for the readers we have! How many of you listen to music while writing? I do! It helps me focus a lot!

Nin-Nin: Lol. You can never go wrong with cherry number five. And really peach paradise, that stuff really works! Don't you just love Maybel's Marvelous Maternal Make up? Yeah, haha, no. Jellia's right guys. Those lines are really killer. So I have a deal. Give one review, get the Jellia gift package. Cherry number five, peach paradise and all other items mentioned on tonights episode of How to Hide a Criminal. Until next time, Ja Ne and WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!