Clash of the Smashers

Chapter Thirty-Seven: The Endful Pit.

"Agh!" Luigi said, hitting the ground roughly.

He got to his feet as quickly as he could, and glanced around. As far as he could tell, he was on an expansive green field. His first thought was that the green was grass, but further examination of the substance revealed it was a chalk-like substance. He tried scraping some of it away, but it did not come off.

He looked around, cautious, but mostly confused. The last thing he could remember was being trapped in the cage…he was talking to Peach, and something hit him from…above? It was kind of blurry.

The place he was in was not helping either. It had no distinguishing features, and with the exception of the ground, and cloudless…and sunless, but still lit blue sky, there was nothing to see.
He turned around, hoping to spot how he got here, but he failed at that minor task. Disheartened, and slightly creeped out, he started to walk forward. He didn't get far before someone dropped in front of him.

It was a small boy, about half of Luigi's height, with a striped shirt and blue shorts. His clothes were different than Luigi's surprisingly clean green shirt and blue overalls, and as Luigi examined the boy's red hat, he realized too that the boy looked like his clothes just got cleaned as well.

With a cough the boy turned over, revealing a bright expressive face, which was pinched with an emotion Luigi couldn't quite determine. With a gasp of surprise the boy jumped back from Luigi, and the green clothed plumber realized who it was.

"Ness! What's going on?" Luigi asked.

"You don't know?"

"Obviously not," Luigi said, ruffling the back of his head in evident confusion.

Before either could continue the conversation, the ground shook around them. Startled, both of them almost fell to their knees, but managed to keep their balance. With a terrible grating noise huge chunks of the ground ripped up from their perch and formed floating platforms. Other larger chunks dropped down in a circular pattern, until somehow the endless plain had become quite endful.

They were on a much smaller strip of land that was floating over an endless expanse of blue nothing, while five or so platforms of various lengths were situated around the edge, some of which of were moving up and down, and the others horizontally.

"What the?" Luigi said, scooching towards the center of the arena, while Ness stared around in confusion.

An answer came to him, but unfortunately it was not a pleasant one.

"Combatants ready?" A booming, but somewhat familiar voice yelled. The very power of the voice caused Luigi's knees to shake.

"What? Ready for what?" Luigi asked, while Ness cocked his head.
"Your battle of course," the voice said in a slightly mocking tone.

"Battle against what?" Luigi demanded, trying very hard not to be terrified.

"Each other."
There were several moments of silence before Luigi laughed.

"You've got to be joking! We're not going to fight! Why would we?"
Whatever meager confidence Luigi managed to summon in that time vanished when he heard the voice laugh, deep and booming.

"Because the winner will go free," the voice told him, after it was done laughing.

"That wouldn't motivate-AGH!" Luigi started to say before Ness slammed him in the stomach with his bat.

"Begin!"
Luigi groaned and clutched his stomach, which was kind of foolish because it allowed Ness to bash him in the back of the head, knocking him to the ground.

Ness reared back to beat Luigi some more, but the plumber wasn't as wounded as he appeared: His leg flashed out, catching the short Ness in the stomach, and knocking him to ground, and forcing his bat to go clattering away. Luigi hopped up to his feet, quickly overcoming his pain.

"Ness! What are you doing?" Luigi asked, maintaining a wary distance from Ness, and keeping between him and the bat.

"Getting out of here!" Ness said, dashing for the bat, but a quick punch from Luigi knocked the boy back.

"You can't trust that voice! It might not be telling the truth!"
"I don't care! I want OUT!" Ness said, this time diving for Luigi, yanking a yo-yo out of his pocket and swinging it at the plumber.

This was not the first time Luigi had seen this attack however, and while the speed was startling, Luigi still managed to duck under the high attack and grab the yo-yo as it came over his head.

"Let go!" Ness demanded, sounding for a second like a petulant kid.

"No way!" Luigi said, using Ness's momentum, and his superior strength, to lift him up and flip him over Luigi in order to slam the lighter boy hard onto the ground. With a sharp yank, Luigi than pulled the yo-yo from Ness's loosened grip, and tossed the yo-yo on top of one of the platforms.

"Are you done yet?" Luigi asked.

"Am I free yet?" Ness said, aiming a weak kick from the ground that Luigi easily dodged.

With a cry of frustration Luigi lunged forward and grabbed Ness, lifting him up into the air, pinning his arms to his sides, and keeping him far enough away so that he was unable to kick at Luigi.

"Now listen here you-" Luigi started to say before a dark swirling tear in the sky ripped open…and deposited a tall man dressed in tight bright colored clothes. He bore a racing helmet that obscured his eyes, making them appear like glowing white shapes that lent him a decidedly creepy appearance.

"Captain Falcon?" both Luigi and Ness said.

"That's right and I'm…wait…what's going on here?" Captain Falcon said in a disturbingly manly voice.

"Ness…the voice," Luigi started to say, but it wasn't necessary, as Falcon quickly came to a conclusion. Of course it was the wrong one.

"Luigi! I know Ness is a whiny little-" Falcon started to say before Ness's cry of outrage drowned out the word, "but that's no reason to beat on him!"

"I'm not-" Luigi started to say, before Ness took advantage of the distraction to slip out of Luigi's grip and drop heavily on the ground in a manner that made it appear as if Luigi violently tossed him down.

"Agh!" Falco said at this seeming brutality, "Looks like I'm going to have to teach you a lesson, you plumber you," Falcon said, before dashing forward at a frighteningly high speed, "Falcon Justice!"

"This is going to hurt!"

The Pit of Ends…

The Smashers tumbled to their doom. The hole that K. Rool had tricked them into falling into had no bottom, and they were forced to fall for all eternity. Kidding!
Actually there was a bottom, and they were falling towards it quite quickly, so they ceased their screaming, and those that could act, did.
Kirby floated over to Link and grabbed him, and despite Link's extra weight, he was able to slow him down considerably. Meta Knight performed a similar action with Bario and Diddy grabbed Raichu and used his jetpack to prevent their untimely death. Mario pulled on his cape and using his great strength he plucked both Falco and Samus out of the air and deposited them safely to the ground.

Grumbling the Smashers didn't waste any time celebrating their survival and turned their attention to the opening high above them. They couldn't see K. Rool, but they could see it closing, and in seconds their only way out was gone. Seeing no other alternative they started to explore the new place they were in.

A bright orange-ish light permeated the entire chamber, revealing to the group that they were on a very large rectangular stretch of land, with a considerable gap between the block they were on and the wall. A cursory examination by Link revealed that the light was because of a thick river of lava flowing a hundred feet or so beneath their feet.

"Great, how do we get out of here now?" Falco asked.

"Diddy?" Raichu asked, turning expectantly to his friend.
"What?" Diddy asked, surprised that he was even being asked, "I don't know what K. Rool is planning!"
"Well somebody better come up with something fast, or this is "adventure" is going to be very over," Link said grumpily.

"Everybody calm down. I can't imagine K. Rool just leaving here to die a slow death by starvation or something…I'm sure some giant monster that Diddy thought had been killed will soon reveal itself and then we'll kill it and figure out how to move on," Bario said matter-of-factly.

"Wow," Samus said, smiling a bit at Bario's words, "These villains are getting really predictable."
"If they are so predictable, than where is the beast?" Meta Knight inquired.

A loud rumbling followed immediately after his words and a large chute opened up near the ceiling. Immediately after that a massive brown wheel came rolling out at a high speed and crashed very hard into the ground only a dozen feet or so from the closest Smashers.

"Right there," Falco said, as the Smashers instinctively backed up and aimed their weapons at the new foe.

It unfolded itself into a huge creature, with the brown wheel turning out to be the thick, metallic, armored, hinged shell of a pink and ridiculously large armadillo that stood a good three of four times higher than Link or Bario, and was longer still. It had wide expressive eyes, but they didn't detract from its frightening mass. It laughed at them in a high pitch as they gaped at its largeness. This than was Army Dillo.

They didn't spend much time gaping however, as they've been confronted with far worse in the past, and they would have opened fire, if it wasn't for the large roar behind them. Spinning around they saw another large beast detach itself from the darkness in the opposite corner of where the now closed chute Army Dillo had come from and fly over to the platform, trapping the Smashers between the two.

It was a massive red dragon-like creature, with clear dragonfly like wings. It was of equivalent size to Army Dillo, but this monstrosity stood erect with a thick snout full of relatively small, but sharp teeth, and long thin arms ending in dangerous looking claws. It had a long tail topped with the same pointy yellow triangles that ran down its back and ended in a spade-shaped tip. Its tiny dark eyes were protected by a thick bony brow. This than was Dogadon.

The arrival of a second massive beast startled them long enough for Army Dillo to begin his attack. Panels located on the side of his shell retracted and two large cannons popped out, (literally popped, it is unclear how exactly they had fit in there) and aimed them at the Smashers. The brown plated armor on his back partially stretched out, until it completely covered his face, protecting his body from a frontal assault.

Dogadon reared back and let loose a massive flaming ball of…snot? Apparently. Any ways the attack, which was as large as most of our heroes flew towards the Smashers, who dodged and started to fire on Dogadon…at the same time that Army Dillo began shooting smaller, but still huge balls of fire from his cannons at them.

Where the balls hit, the ground seemed to shake slightly, and the small explosion resulting from the balls, and the small waves of flame, caused the Smashers to focus more on evading than on countering.

After several close calls however, Raichu managed to get enough time to fire a bolt of electricity at Army Dillo, at the same instant Samus fired a stun blast at him. The attacks connected on opposite sides, and despite the armor, the electric attacks appeared to do some damage.

Samus's fizzled out pretty quick, but the more powerful volt from Raichu quickly washed over Army Dillo, forcing his armor up and revealing his head, which was quivering from the amplification the electric attack received from his metal armor. The small bolts crackling across Army Dillo quickly reached his two cannons, and with a small explosion, they both popped off and rolled into the lava.

At the same time, Diddy and Link managed to slam Dogadon with their respective explosives. The attacks caught him in the face, and with a cry of rage and surprise his wings gave out and plunged him into the lava, leading to his certain doom.

Actually not. With yet another roar Dogadon burst from the flames a hundred feet below and flapped back up, his body scorched and sizzling. Falco, Mario, Bario and Meta opened fire, but with the element of surprise gone, their attacks were ignored. Bright yellow beams of energy flared from Dogadon before he leaned forward and blasted a massive wall of fire onto the stage that quickly expanded to cover it from one side to the next and grew to over ten feet in height.

Meanwhile, Samus, Raichu and now Kirby were attempting to focus on Army Dillo, but the shouts from the others as they backed away from the encroaching wall of flame distracted them long enough for Army Dillo to leap up and surround himself entirely in his armor, turning again into a massive wheel.

The characters backing away from the wall of flame quickly bumped into the ones backing away from the wheel of Dillo. Realizing that there wasn't a lot of time they dashed to opposite sides of the giant beast and ran to the opposite end of the arena from Dogadon.

Army Dillo slammed into the wall of flame, and for a second it looked like he was going to take some serious damage…but his armored body overpowered it and the flames dissipated, although Army Dillo was very much slowed down.

Dogadon stared at the Smashers for a bit, before roaring and releasing more giant snot balls. Army Dillo had two more panels pop out of his side that revealed large engine like devices that flipped down and pointed at the ground. Apparently they were some kind of jetpack thing, because as soon as they started whirring, Army Dillo was lifted into the air.

The Smashers managed to regain their composure long enough to fire a few attacks at Army Dillo, but they bounced or dissipated harmlessly against his mighty armor.

In retaliation Army Dillo deactivated his jets, slamming him into the ground and creating a massive green shockwave, which spread out in a circular fashion. This was not the first time the group had dealt with shockwaves before however, and the attack was easily hopped over.

Dogadon had paused in his attacks while Army Dillo performed its shockwave, but now Army Dillo was floating back up into the air and Dogadon was shooting out the flaming balls of snot again.

Determined to at least do some damage, the Smashers focused their attacks on Dogadon, the less armored of the deadly duo. Most of the attacks were minor annoyances, but Link's bomb arrows, and Mario's firebombs seemed to do considerable damage to the dragon-like beast.

While the Smashers attacked Dogadon, Army Dillo partially unrolled out of its shell, and while still floating in midair it summoned its ultimate weapon…a massive cannon unfurled out of its top shell, almost as large as Army Dillo itself and it began firing humongous fireballs at the Smashers.

The attack came as a surprise, and Mario and Kirby were both grazed by near misses that sent them almost tumbling off the edge of the arena.
Fortunately the attack ended soon, and with a desire to end the battle, Army Dillo launched a huge missile that homed in on Diddy. Its red tip and painted teeth served to make it look absolutely absurd, but dangerous nonetheless.

Diddy however had encountered this particular attack before, and utilizing his maneuverability he managed to get it to go right behind him. Leading it on he dived towards a confused Dogadon who apparently was going to fall for a very simple trick.

Diddy jumped up towards Dogadon and then dropped down fast. The missile went up…but didn't go down fast enough to miss hitting Dogadon on the right side.

With a mighty explosion and a pained shriek, Dogadon careened out of control until it hit Army Dillo, sending both of them crashing onto the far side of the platform, forcing the entire thing to shake.
Unbalanced they struggled to right themselves, but it was over for them.

"Fire!" Bario commanded, and the Smashers launched every attack they had.

Already unsteady, the jumbled mass of dragon and mammal lost their tenuous grip on the platform, and plummeted a hundred feet into a deep lake of lava.

Even then Dogadon might have returned if not for the weight of Army Dillo holding him down. The thick armor managed to protect most of Army Dillo, but the liquid flames seeped through the cracks and openings and melted the creature in a short time.

In a matter of moments both were dead and the pink dust that floated up from their charred carcasses healed the wounded Smashers.

"Well…that was an unnecessary waste of time," Raichu said.

"Why?" Diddy asked.

"Why didn't K. Rool just drop us into the lake of lava, instead of dispatching two minor villains that have beaten before?"
"Uh…,"

Before Diddy could attempt to answer the question a shudder rippled through the platform they were on, and a strange feeling passed through the group.

"What was that?" Falco asked.

"I'm…not sure," Bario answered.

"Are…we moving?" Samus asked.

Struck by a sudden suspicion Diddy dashed to the edge of the platform they were on. A quick glance of the edge confirmed the sinking feeling in his gut.

"Hey guys," Diddy called, just loud enough to be heard, "We are moving. Down."
It looked like the lake of lava was going to claim nine more victims.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

After K. Rool closed the only exit to the chamber he sent the Smashers down, he spent at least 45 seconds laughing to himself, as he was quite pleased with his evil plan. However he quickly became suspicious of his victory and began to doubt the capabilities of his minions. So he decided he would take action, and finish them once and for all.

With a ridiculously dramatic gesture he hurled his scientist garb off, the lab coat and gloves crumpling into a corner. Temporarily unclothed, the naked tyrant quickly managed to produce his red cape and crown and with more dramatic flourish than necessary plopped them back on his head.
He then dashed through a small door on the side of the room opposite of that which the Smashers came through. Well, relatively small. Since it had to fit his massive bulk it was easily within the size limit of "Crazy Huge," but other than that, it was a rather unremarkable door. It was a made of a typical, plain brown wood that was quite uninteresting. Really, there was nothing even remotely noteworthy about the door…so why this paragraph is focusing on the door is a complete mystery.

After charging through the unexceptional door, and leaving it in small wooden pieces, K. Rool was on the outer part of his fortress, on the narrow strip of land that circled it and separated it from the ocean. Continuing to run K. Rool looped around the back of his fortress until he came to a large pier.

The pier stretched out for about twenty or so feet, terminating well into the ocean, but other than the impressive width of the pier, it was not anything particularly interesting.

He dashed to the end of the pier, with the thick wood shaking beneath his clawed feet, until he came to a silver metal hatch appropriately sized for his body and leapt into it.

He hit the metal floor beneath the hatch with a loud thud, his weight causing the area he was in to slosh a bit in the water.

He was in what appeared to be some kind of aqua-marine vessel, like something one would use to travel beneath the water in some kind of…below-marine. It consisted of one large room with no distinguishing features that had a large screen on one side, a glass screen on the other, showing a clear blue underwater view and a jumble of complicated controls.

A handful of his green crocodilian minions were fidgeting around with the machinery strewn throughout the vessel, but K. Rool ignored them.

Not wasting any time he confidently strode to a control panel and with a flick of a switch, closed the hatch. He was about to wrap his large hands around a large lever, when the screen flickered and a familiar face appeared.

"I trust you have taken care of them?" a booming voice asked, causing K. Rool to jump and face the green-skinned, red-haired man. His Kremlings ignored the voice.

"Taken care of…oh, yes!" K. Rool answered, whatever evil charm he had managed to gather collapsing in the face of Ganondorf's superior malice.

"Really?" Ganondorf asked, cocking his head with a skeptical look in his eye.

"Well, no not yet. But they are as good as gone! Just give me a little while and they'll all be very dead!"
"Good. We have started the tournament, and things are proceeding well. I want all loose ends wrapped up as soon as possible," Ganondorf said.

"So…I'll be going now," K. Rool said, hesitantly turning back to his controls.

"Wait!" Ganondorf commanded, forcing K. Rool to turn back quickly.

"Y-yes?"
"M. C. has decided to change our mission," Ganondorf said, in a manner that indicated he was not pleased.

"J-just now?"
"What?" Ganondorf said, confused by the question.

"Did he change it just now?"
" What do you mean by…oh…no. It is why I contacted you," Ganondorf said, irritated by the digression.

"What is the change?"
"He wants as many of them as alive as possible, so if you can, refrain from killing them. He was especially clear in that he wanted the violet-haired swordsman captured."
"Captured? But it would be easier to kill them!"
"I know, but orders are orders," Ganondorf said, with a hint of sympathy.

"O-okay," K. Rool said, upset by the change in plans.

"Now go!" Ganondorf said, before cutting off the communication.

Clearly Ganondorf was exerting his dominance over K. Rool, and the fact that he had mentioned those crucial orders as a last-minute addition was making the reptilian king quite upset. But he daren't go against M.C.'s orders and Ganondorf was technically his superior…for now.

K. Rool stared at the ocean for a short while before sighing and manipulating the controls to his under-marine he managed to get it to travel into deeper waters. Maneuvering it around the island he aimed it at a large section of the rock the island was based on.

"Can't let them die…so…I have to do this," K. Rool said, before slamming the throttle down and sending the aquatic craft full speed…into the solid rock of the island itself.