CHAPTER 32

Hermione had never been so grateful for darkness. She didn't know what time it was, but it was still dark outside from the look of the enchanted windows.

A dull ache throbbed in her temples and she felt sick. She had cried on the bed until she had passed out from exhaustion. Her mind was blank. Simple, blissfully silent. She slowly blinked while looking at the ceiling.

"I told you to leave me alone."

She didn't have to look around to know that he was there. The room felt different when he was in it.

"And I said no."

Hermione felt too tired to argue or even to think. To do anything for that matter. So they were silent for a while. The Gryffindor started snoozing again as she felt someone cover her with a blanket.

"Severus?"

It was a whisper that left her lips. Not a question, nor a statement.

"Yes." His voice was as hushed as hers had been.

She could feel him sitting down at the bottom of the bed, the mattress shifted under his weight, but she kept her eyes closed, not wanting to start crying again.

"Why don't you trust me?"

"It's not that easy, and you also didn't trust me."

"At least I tried."

"I tried."

"Liar."

She felt him glaring at her in the darkness, and perversely that made her feel a little better. Hermione didn't like that he was so calm now and she wasn't.

"I have never lied to you Hermione."

"You said you would never intentionally hurt me."

"It wasn't intentional."

"You could have fooled me."

"I was angry Hermione, and I will never forgive myself for that."

"But you want me to forgive you."

There was only silence in answer to her question, but she knew that it was meant as agreement. Hermione turned onto her side, and faced the empty space beside her. Amber eyes stole down until she saw the dark figure leaning on one of the bed posts.

"I know you are angry Hermione, and you are right."

"But?"

"But… I can't let you go."

"Why didn't you just ask me? You just thought the worst of me."

"I have been lied to so many times Hermione that sometimes I forget what it means to simply trust."

"I never lied to you Severus."

"I know, but sometimes when things are going right, for maybe the first time in your life, you expect things to go wrong."

"You were expecting it to go wrong? Why?"

"Everything I have, I've had to fight for. This job, pardon for my crimes, my life. Nothing has been easy."

"So you were expecting me to cheat? You have got to be kidding. You expected me to find someone else? I was giving you all the time and attention I possibly could. Why would you…?"

"And why do you think? It is easy for you to say it now."

"It is easy for me because I am not paranoid!"

"I am not paranoid. I was just angry."

"Being angry didn't give you the right to act like you did."

Hermione sat up and leaned against the headboard, so now they were looking at one another across the bed.

"Rights and reasons weren't high on my list then."

"And what was?"

"Lust."

Hermione didn't know what to say to that.

"Excuse me?"

"You are not that naïve Hermione. You do know that I desire you."

Hermione squirmed under his dark eyes; she felt strange as his eyes roamed over her bathrobe clad body. It was a weird feeling in the pit of her stomach and it wasn't the first time she got it. Since she came back she didn't want to dwell on it. He was her husband and had a right to look at her like this, but she understood now that this feeling used to appear long before she signed his petition.

"For … how long?"

"A while"

"Before… Before I signed?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Why does any man lust after a woman? It is just the way things are. In our nature"

"But... But…"

"But what? I have never claimed to be a good man, but I never have or would have crossed that line. But there is no point denying that you were the only student of mine that I have ever been drawn to, that I felt anything for. I never thought that one day I would be given the right to expect something from you."

Hermione found it hard to breath.

"But… You were always so hard on me."

There was a laugh in the darkness and the Gryffindor flushed brightly at her choice of words.

"Indeed."

"That's not what I meant!"

"I doubt you would have been all right and able to study knowing that your teacher wants to give you some extra lessons."

"Pervert."

"Guilty as charged my dear."

Hermione was getting angry. He looked and sounded genuinely amused. To calm herself she nervously started to look around for her wand.

"It's not there if you are looking for your wand."

Her attention snapped to Severus again.

"What? Give it back!"

"I feel sorry and guilty, but that doesn't mean that I am willing to face the dangerous end of your wand."

"Bastard."

"I can assure you that my parents were married when I was both conceived and born."

"Leave me alone."

"You need to rest."

"I need to be free of you."

"I am afraid that that is not going to happen."

Hermione pulled the blanket up to her chin and sulked in the darkness. Her life was just peachy.

"How do you feel?"

"Terrific. But I would feel even better if you would leave me alone."

"By the bed is a Headache Relief Potion and a Dreamless sleep."

"I don't need them."

"I don't want you to be sick Hermione."

"The only thing that makes me sick is you. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't feel so pathetic now."

"Have you eaten?"

"Yes."

"Good. Drink the potions and rest. We will talk tomorrow."

"Why not now? I thought that you wanted to talk with me. Didn't you?"

"You need to calm down first."

"I am calm. Calmer than I have ever been."

"Drink the Potions and get some rest."

"I don't want your potions."

"Suit yourself. Tonight I will spend on the couch..."

"You can move there permanently, I am not sleeping in a bed with you."

Severus didn't say anything just looked at her for a minute. It was clear that he didn't like that idea.

"Rest."

"Drop dead."

At that Severus decided that it was time to call it a night and leave her to calm down. Soundlessly he rose and left the room, closing the door behind himself.

Hermione was still looking at the door a few minutes after he left. 'Well, that went well.' Actually she didn't know exactly how conversations like that were supposed to go.

Wrapped in a blanket like a warm cocoon, she tried not to think, but it didn't work. Bits and pieces of their conversation were spinning in her head. It sounded like a broken record, a foreign broken record… that was playing backwards. It didn't make any sense.

Hermione snuggled into her pillow and closed her eyes, wishing that sleep would come faster.

'He wasn't serious about… wanting me before I signed the petition was he?'

Hermione tried to remember any signs of special attention he might have shown, but she couldn't think of anything. He was always so tough with her. He checked all her work in painful detail, trying to find a mistake. If she ever looked at him his eyes showed nothing.

'I should have known better than to trust a Slytherin, or marry one for that matter…'

Pity that you don't know the consequences of your choices in advance. Good choice. Bad choice. Who decides which is which? You? Those around you? God?

Once she heard someone say "There is no good or bad, just different points of view."

The pain pulsing in her head started to increase, and not being able to take it anymore Hermione reached for one of the vials hoping that it was what she needed.

After drinking both of them she half smiled into the darkness. Anyone else, after having a row with the infamous Potions Master would have been afraid to take and drink anything from him, but Hermione knew better. He might rant and rave and sulk, but he would never spike a potion with something that would influence her free will.

She knew that he wasn't above doing it to someone else, but he wanted her, not a mindless puppet by his side.

Talking of being by his side, it was clear as day that he wasn't going to let her go, no matter how sorry he was about what happened.

Hermione pulled a blanket over her head and groaned; somewhere in the distance she could hear knocking.

"WHAT?!" She shouted from the bed, not even bothering to lift her head. She still felt sleepy.

"You have guests Hermione."

The Gryffindor sat up in the bed to see Severus standing in the doorway. She glared at him while trying to rub the sleep out of her eyes.

"What do you want?"

"Good morning to you too."

His voice was calm and even, but Hermione wasn't impressed.

"What. Do. You. Want?"

"I need something from my wardrobe, and you have guests."

"Guests?"

"Yes. Miss Parkinson and Bulstrode."

"Pansy and Millicent? What time is it?"

" Half past ten."

Hermione groaned. She was supposed to have met them in the Great Hall at ten. After making them swear a Wizards Oath that they would tell no one of what happened, and in return they insisted that she meet them to make sure she was ok.

"Tell them that I will be in the sitting room in 10 minutes."

"As you wish."

Ten minutes later Hermione stepped into the sitting room to see Severus at a table checking some essays and on the couch making a show of drinking tea sat Pansy and Millicent looking distinctly uncomfortable by their teachers' presence.

"Morning girls."

"Hermione!"

For a second it seemed that Pansy was going to jump up and hug her, as if the Gryffindor had returned from hell. Hermione smiled at the two girls and looked at Severus to find him concentrating on his marking.

'Right. Nice try Severus, but you never do any work in the sitting room.'

"Good Morning Mrs Snape."

Millicent was collected and managed a formal greeting.

"Sorry. I overslept. But we can go to breakfast now if you want."

"Hermione?"

"Yes Severus?"

Severus slowly put down the quill and looked at her. He didn't look happy. It would have been the first time that Hermione would go to meals alone without his accompanying her.

"I will escort you."

"I will be fine. I know the way"

"I insist."

If Pansy and Millicent weren't there then she would have given him a piece of her mind. But Hermione didn't feel like making a scene in front of others, so she took a deep breath and glared at him.

"Fine. I will just grab my robe."

The Slytherin girls looked at each other and said nothing. Being married to their Head of House was a tough job. There were lots of jokes going around the school on that topic, but no one knew the real extent of Snape's protectiveness over his wife.

Two minutes later Hermione reappeared with a deep blue outer robe on and her hair tied back.

"Let's go."

Severus rose from his seat and walked up to Hermione, offering her his hand while she was looking on in disbelief.

"You have got to be kidding."

The man in front of her said nothing, but it was clear that he wasn't kidding. Hermione almost shook in anger.

'He's acting like nothing happened.'

She couldn't believe his nerve. She clenched her fists. This hadn't been her first surprise since waking up, when she was in the bathroom she noticed that her bruises were gone, every single one of them. He had obviously healed them whilst she had been asleep.

Hermione tried to calm down as she saw Pansy and Millicent looking a little pale.

"Forget it." She hissed at him.

"It will look strange."

"I don't care how it looks."

"But I do."

"Tough."

"You are my wife"

"What's your point?"

"Hermione…"

"What?"

"You are making a scene."

"Severus, I am not going to take your hand and you are the one making a scene."

Hermione's voice dropped to an angry whisper as she glared at the Head of Slytherin. It was really a battle of wills, and this time the Slytherin, against all odds, decided to back down a little.

"But you will walk beside me."

'I guess I should be grateful to God for small favours.'

"Deal."

Pansy silently watched the argument, Hermione looked angry and Snape, for the sake of peace was willing to compromise, something that rarely happened. A Slytherin willingly stepping back and offering a solution that didn't entirely benefit himself and the Gryffindor understood it, and accepted the offer.

'No wonder Brown calls him Hermione's Batguard.'

The raven haired girl had never paid too much attention to the pair as they were when they were together, as she thought it would have been rude, but now, walking beside them through the dungeons, she had to admit that they looked… weird, but strangely suited at the same time. Of course she wasn't one to judge what made a weird couple.

Pansy felt her cheeks flush.

Of all the possible boys she could go and develop feelings for, she had managed to get a crush on Neville Longbottom. She was still working out how to deal with the bizarre fact that he seemed to look at her as a friend.

'I really have to talk to Hermione about this; she knows him and is married. She should know what to do with a complicated relationship… Besides, for Heavens sake, I can get Longbottom to like me!'

The truth was that Pansy didn't have the foggiest idea what to do. Being Slytherin, she couldn't just go up to him and tell him that she liked him, and she was running out of valid reasons to talk to him.

As they continued their trek to the Great Hall, Hermione tried her best not to look at Severus every two seconds. It was hard, as his mere presence was making her feel on edge. She wanted to take a step to the side and make some more space between them. Not even touching him, she could feel echoes of his hands on her. She rubbed at her wrists trying to get rid of the feeling. It seemed that her skin was ultra sensitive where he had touched her, and it made her feel irritable that the feeling wasn't passing.

Apparently the saying about Slytherins being able to smell trouble was true, because as soon as the Snape's stepped into the Great Hall the entire Slytherin table became very interested in their plates and tried to stay as quiet as possible. Their Head of House looked angry and his wife pissed off. It didn't even take a glance at them to see that something was wrong. Very wrong. Even Malfoy Junior sat quietly looking at his father from time to time as if asking what was wrong with the two.

Slytherins weren't the only ones to notice the black mood of the Snape's, even if they were the first. So by the time Hermione and Severus were seated half the hall was wondering what was wrong. There was a general feeling of overwhelming relief that it was a Sunday, having Snape for a Professor in general was a curse, but having Snape in a mood like this was the worst penalty in life.

"Problems in paradise Severus? Has something happened?"

"Nothing that should concern you Lucius."

Severus Snape sat in his usual place, and tried his best not to hit someone. Lucius Malfoy would have been is first choice had his patience snapped. Malfoy being the new DADA professor sat by Filius, still close to Severus as the Charms professor was so tiny.

"I wonder what kind of advise you could give on improving a relationship with your spouse, considering the fights you had with Narcissa could be heard a mile away." Flitwick squeaked.

Lucius Malfoy glared at the tiny Professor sitting between him and Severus. It was true that his and Narcissa's married life resembled one never ending fight. The only reason they had Draco was because they got drunk once and didn't have anyone else to screw. Simple as that. But that still didn't give the little pipsqueak the right to talk about his married life.

"Well at least I have been married Filius."

"That depends on how you look at things Lucius…"

While Flitwick and Malfoy were having a discussion about the pros and cons of being married, Hermione had to answer the concerned questions of her friends.

"Jesus 'Mya, what happened? Snape looks even more blood thirsty now than he did before."

"Nothing happened. We just… had an argument. That's all."

"And from the look of things, he was wrong… Right? He looks slightly guilty when he looks at you."

"You could say that."

"Can we help?"

Hermione shook her head taking a sip of her morning tea.

"Thanks. But there is nothing you can do."

"He's been looking for you, you know."

Hermione looked questioningly at Parvati.

"… So I heard."

"He came to Gryffindor Tower to ask us if we have seen you." She almost choked on her tea.

"He What?? You have got to be kidding."

Now that was a surprise. Hermione looked wide eyed at the Head Table where Severus seemed to be in a heated discussion with Malfoy senior.

"Yes, I was also a bit surprised to find him standing in our doorway."

"He went to the girls dorms?"

"Yes. He even looked slightly out of breath."

"We think that he had been running, but that is just too impossible to imagine."

Hermione looked, once more, from Lavender to the Head Table.

"Did anyone else see him?"

Lavender shrugged.

"Oh, a few people. I am not sure. Well approximately half the tower. I don't think the Weaslette will ever get over the embarrassment.

"Ginny? What happened?"

"You know guys cant get up the girls stairs, so some of them have developed the habit of walking around, not very dressed… so…."

"Oh my… Ginevra had to be mortified. Well, that explains what she wanted to tell me."

"So where were you?"

"I went to Hogsmead with Pansy."

"That's all? He looked like you were about to leave him for good. Never thought I would see him that nervous. He… "

"Parvati! Can you please not inform the entire table of my personal life?"

Parvati Patil blushed a little and smiled sheepishly at her friend as she looked around.

"Sorry."

"That's ok."

"So is everything ok now?"

Hermione sighed, picking at her food. She wasn't really hungry this morning.

"Let's just say that it is something we are working on."

"Sounds … promising?"

"Can we talk about something else?" She asked hopefully and her friends got the hint.

The hall was bustling with laughter and chatter as always. Hermione just wanted to forget her problems, even for a little while. Pretend that she was like all the others; happy, carefree and not married.

"Sure. Did you hear the latest news?"

"Apparently not."

"Ginny Weasley is getting at it with Malfoy."

Hermione bit her tongue instead of her toast in astonishment and covered her mouth with her hand so as not to curse. It hurt. When the pain lessened she looked at Parvati with wide eyes.

"Malfoy? As in Draco Alfonce Malfoy? Ferret Boy?"

"That's him."

"His middle name is Alfonce? How did you know that?"

"I married his Head of House."

"Oh, yeah. Right."

"What did you mean by 'getting at it'? They aren't, you know? Ginny's taste is much better than that… isn't it?"

"Well, I wouldn't bet my wand on it, but that's the rumour."

"A rumour? Well, you know it might be just that, a Rumour."

"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about that... You never can tell, and being smart isn't exactly something that she's famous for." Lavender looked pointedly at Hermione and smiled.

"She deserves everything she gets."

"I pity her, I mean… Malfoy? Pansy's told me some things about him. What is Ginny thinking?"

"Thinking? Don't give her that much credit 'Mya"

"And you aren't giving her enough Parvati."

"She is nothing but…"

"Parvati! What do you think about today's weather?"

Hermione asked with her voice slightly raised as she saw McGonagall walking by, looking like some kind of vulture.

"What are you…" Parvati was a bit thrown by the sudden change of topic until she saw her head of house walking by. "Right. It's cold. Rainy and cold. A real autumn… She's passed. Weird, McGonagall is never late."

"What's it matter, so long as she is off our case, its fine by me. So anyway, what are you girls going to do today?"

"Nothing much…"

When breakfast was nearing its end, Hermione was trying to decide what to do with her day. Returning directly to their rooms was out of the question. She already had all of her homework done, the weather was horrible and her friends were all busy. Short of wandering around the castle on her own, the only choice left was the library. So before her lovely husband was up from his seat Hermione was off to the library.

When Hermione entered, the first thing she noticed was that it was cold inside and she wrapped her robe tighter around herself. Eyes automatically drifted towards the ever present Madam Pince, who was sitting away from the check in desk at one of the larger student tables, looking quite angry and furiously leafing through a stack of books for something.

"Madam Pince? Excuse me?"

The librarian jumped a little as she registered the voice beside her.

"Miss Gran… I mean, Mrs Snape. You scared me. Is there something you wanted?"

"I just wanted to ask why it is so cold in here. It's usually much warmer."

The other woman sighed and rubbed her temples with one hand. She looked very tired.

"I wish I knew. It seems that the warming charm needs to be recast."

"Oh… I read about that. Every few years or so yes?"

"Every five years. Because of the books, they need very special care, you know."

"Yes, of course"

"It seems that there is some kind of counter spell cancels out all the spells we cast. All of them!"

"What happens?"

"It s just that as soon as we cast them there is a blue glow. It is strange. Because that should only happen if some kind of outsider tries to modify spells in Hogwarts, but that is impossible. I have the Headmasters permission to do it, and this is the first rejection of my magic in over 20 years of working here."

Hermione went still, and very silent.

'Outsiders? Can it be? The library needs my permission to be heated? Oh, that's just great…'

The Gryffindor didn't want to say anything, but she just couldn't leave it like this. It was freezing and students would be coming in here soon.

"Madam Pince, is there anyone else in the library, beside us?"

The librarian didn't even lift her eyes from the Heating Spells book that she was scanning.

"No, we are alone Mrs Snape. It is just too cold for anyone else to be here."

"Good"

With that, Hermione turned to the library door and with a flick of her wand it was closed.

"Mrs Snape?"

Madam Pince looked a bit lost watching as the girl stood in the centre of the spacious room.

Suddenly there was a soft neon blue light around her for a second as she raised her wand up and spoke:

'By the Power of Protecto

Granted me by Sinful Gods

Let the tables shift for angels

Let the Demons freeze in Hell

Walls of stone and finest marble

Be released from endless cold.

Gentle breezes of long lost summers

Warm this room and all that's here

That's my will so mote it be.

A light fresh breeze picked up from nowhere and it slowly got warmer in the library. The air even seemed to smell of grass and summer rain, but it was pleasantly warm and dry.

The librarian sat with her mouth gaping.

"Well, now there is no need for you to recast any warming spells for the next… 100 years or so."

"How? Why? … But… you shouldn't be able to do that. There are spells to counterpoint all students… Oh my … Oh my goodness… Protecto! It... It…"

"Yes, it can be. I did cast Protecto and I would be most grateful if you wouldn't tell anyone what you have just seen. Please?"

"Of course. If you wish it, I will swear not to tell a living soul. Your secret is safe with me. Goodness. I have heard legends about that Spell. But I am babbling. From my personal experience I know that there will be no one wanting the library until at least noon. Would you like some tea and biscuits?"

"In the library?" Hermione was more than a little surprised at this, many a time she had witnessed the librarians' almost violent response towards food in the library.

The librarian just waved her hand dismissively

"We are both adults Mrs Snape and a cup of tea never hurt anyone."

"Well... Sure... That would be lovely."

Review?